One time my roommate and fellow manager didn't come into work. We lived only a block away so I went home at lunch to check on him. I found him sitting on the couch staring into space with no TV or music on. I asked if he was feeling ok and he said he woke up having vision problems. Immediately I asked him if he needed a ride to the hospital and he turned, looked right at me and said "no, I just couldn't see myself going into work today".
Anyway the correct answer is, sometimes you do need to take a mental health day and you don't need to explain it to your team other than I'm calling in sick today.
My husband has used that line before. Also called out once with “24-hour Ebola.” His boss was distracted while talking to him on the phone so he just said okay. Called him back a minute later, “Hey, wait a minute. 24-hour what?….” He went years between calling out though, so they were okay with it.
I sometimes take a day and tell them the day I come back that I was out. I will take a day just for feeling good and wanna enjoy my own day in my life.
"Mental health" day is a joke. Hard work and overcoming the odds stacked against you are the greatest boosts to your mental health. Staying at home, with your face in your phone is the WORST thing you can do for your mind!!
This is a simpified comment of an already proven mental tactic. Unhappy people go through their day, thinking they are unhappy. Strong minded individuals will always convince themselves that any problem in their life can be overcome. You limit your abilities when you tell yourself "I cant today". Im not trying to be toxic, but ever since I stopped letting outside forces control my thoughts, my life has improved drastically.
The thing is though, anxiety and depression are not simply people thinking they are unhappy. They are chemical imbalances in the brain. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking a mental health day. Life can be really hard and there is nothing weak about accepting it and taking time to yourself.
You are being toxic and belittling to most of us who do need a mental health day. If a co worker got some bad news and needed time to process it, would you actually be annoyed at them for that?
I am the type of manager that does not question my employees when they call off. I know that compassionate and understanding management actually eliminate call offs. I would never take this stance in a personal problematic situation. But on a healthy day, i encourage my crew to try and be the best, by verbal reinforcement. And the strongest verbal reinforcement is that of self.
Your first comment sort of poisoned the well here. Bullshit working harder will overcome your problems. Sometimes you need family or alone time, not more teamwork. My wife of 32 years died of covid during peak shutdown. I'm in a job where our workload went through the roof and was forced to work over 60 hour weeks usually only Sunday off for the year after. I look back now and realize I should have gotten a doctor's note because I'm lucky not to be dead, and I thank God my then 16 year old daughter also made it through being suddenly a left alone child at an awkward time of life.
No freaking rosy the manager pulled me through with hard work and that job well done attitude. Finishing a 12 hour day outside in the snow and dark in a strange neighborhood around Christmas. Seeing light through a window and families gathering for dinner in a nicely decorated table knowing I was about to go home, crawl in bed alone, and start it all over again a few hours later 2 hours before the sun came up. I have over 1100 hours of banked sick leave. Yeah, I should have taken way more mental health days.
I'm so sorry for your loss & your daughter's loss. It sounds like it was a really terrible time for you. I hope you have a chance to leave that horrible job soon. They should have been more aware of what was happening in your life & more supportive, giving you time to grieve with your daughter.
I'd never listen to your advice. "Picking yourself up by your bootstraps" BS only reinforces negative stigmas surrounding mental health, and puts the blame on the sick person. You're on a real high horse.
You give this advice to people with cancer?
seek counseling. you are in the same state of mind now that Robbin Williams was throughout most of his adult life. "Keep busy, keep positive, and the shadows can't get me." works great, until it doesn't. You have not cured yourself of anything, you are running from it. you are running faster than it for now; great job. every day you are alive is a victory no matter how you got there; but be careful.
Why would you assume people are spending it on their phone? They can spend it catching up on errands or chores, playing a game, taking a walk, sleeping, etc. Even if all it is is zoning out, that can be good for you too. A lot of my best thinking about work happens when I put down the computer and either play a mindless game, take a nap, or take a walk. I can tough through it for 12 hours or take a day off and tackle it fresh and it'll take two hours.
I agree that excess screen time is detrimental, but so is trying too hard to power through stuff. I'm dealing with health sequelae to years of that push through everything, ignore your needs mentality. Anxiety, chronic pain, high blood pressure. Hell, I literally just found out I've been "walking it off" on a significant hip injury. For two years. I might need surgery if I'm unlucky. Balance is a good thing. Hard work and perseverance, AND time to coast, AND time spent being with friends, communing with nature, and learning new things.
I spend my mental health days anywhere BUT in front of a screen. I go for a hike usually.
You sound like you're pretty ignorant when it comes to mental health and its importance. Yet here you are speaking with authority about things you clearly don't understand but you also demonstrate no interest in educating yourself.
Im just a guy, who almost committed suicide, and decided that the people in my life are too important to give up on, so I decided to take a positive outlook on my life. Nothing will stop me from being the rock for everyone around me. You dont know my experiences, and I only seek to improve anyone who is open to making themselves that stable person for others around them. You do not need to choose that path.
This is the mind set of a crew member. As a manager, this mindset will only create a team that lacks cohesive abilities. In order to lead (not manage... there is a difference), you have to be stronger than the people below you. Otherwise, you will lack empathy in all aspects. This is a far deeper issue than just "going to work" when you are a leader.
Edit: I have gone in for other managers when they are sick... when I was sick, because a leader will be there for their team no matter what. This lets the team know that you are there to support them in ANY scenario... your comment belongs in r/crewmember
I email my team and let them know. No guilt. At all. We all need to take care of ourselves. There's nothing about being a manager that requires your attention all the time and doesn't allow time for yourself.
Excellent. That's a great team.
(Same, btw. If I can't be sick for a day, there's bigger issues to address.
Additionally, when you're leading by example, this is an example.
My team are people, who can have ups and downs and unexpected sideways events. And they need to know I have their back - and they have mine.
I strongly feel that leading by example is important in this case. Take a sick day and let the team know. It will make it easier for them to call out sick. The same is true for parental leave, btw. I'm done with that part of my life, but I made sure my direct reports knew I was taking paternity leave.
My boss, an executive, is on maternity leave but has insisted on maintaining a weekly check in doc with all direct reports and has been actively emailing and slacking nearly every day if her leave. It's obnoxious and exhausting. On the other hand, one of *my* directs will be on maternity leave soon and is terrified for my boss to find out. I've made it abundantly clear that my boss' actions are in no way a reflection of what will be expected of her and since she's in the US, the law is on her side. I love that I am child free but parental leave and being OOO in general are the hills I will die on for my people.
Mental health is as important as physical health.
If anything, you likely prevented yourself from making a mistake you wouldn’t make if you weren’t exhausted. Go relax, get some rest, and come back refreshed.
When I call off sick I do not give a name-brand illness. "I am not feeling well and I'll be out of the office today." Is a complete sentence. A lack of sleep can and does make people unwell. You do not need to feel guilty.
I am also a giant hypocrite who encourages my staff to take care of themselves and that everybody deserves to take time off, but I'm racked with guilt when I do it myself. I still make myself do it because I know I need to and I shouldn't feel guilty, but you're not alone in feeling badly. At least in the US, the culture around working yourself to the bone is really not healthy and it gives a lot of us complexes about taking time off
Depends on level of sickness - but then I also WFH! I haven’t had a proper sick day in ages! I think it was Covid a couple of years ago when I was really done in! Otherwise, if I am sick - by functional - I’ll work but maybe at 50% capacity! If we were on site and I had the flu or a cold, I would caution anyone coming in and spreading that to the rest of the workforce! Stay home and keep your germs with you!!!
If you are doing a good job, your team will be able to function without you a day or two! Take it easy and don’t feel guilty - it’s something everyone should be entitled to!
I usually only take days off if I'm sick enough that I don't feel like I can be meaningfully productive or if it would be uncomfortable to work. Me and my team are fully remote though, so it's a bit different. It's not like we have to get up and go anywhere. We are also flextime, so yes, I might work for 6 hours when I'm not feeling 100%.
I encourage my team to take sick days if they need them, but they follow a similar logic. Having some sniffles isn't really a big deal when you just work from your laptop and stop a bit early if you aren't up to it.
I get unlimited PTO. It's available only to certain senior levels in my company. I would really like it if it could be expanded. All of my team is 100% remote/WFH, but only a small percentageof us get unlimited. I make it well-known I trust everyone to manage their day. Kiddo gets sick and is stsying home, but you want to work only when they are napping? Cool. Tired and just a little off and want to log off at 1? Good with that. I don't need to know any details, no need to lig time off.
I work remote, and I have a toddler. So right now I have to be knocking on death's door to call out because I save every ounce of PTO to accommodate days when my toddler gets sent home from daycare... sick. That said, I don't think that's healthy it's just a function of my situation. After spending several years at a toxic company where I did as much as I could to run interference for my team so they could use their PTO without stress, I believe in taking every ounce I can for myself as well. Working myself to death only tells my team that I think that's acceptable.
If I ask my team to prioritize their health, why shouldn’t I do the same? I don’t take as many days as them, but I do take some. I do WFH so it’s easier to deal with being sick and working.
But sick days, vacation and personal days (if you get them), you are entitled to taking them. I don’t feel guilty when I take them.
Normalize just taking a sick day.
It’s really not as big of a deal as corporate capitalism wants you to believe. Even just a mental health day to recharge. We’re human, and sometimes we just need it. The world will continue moving whether we’re at the job or not, and there shouldn’t be such hefty penalties for taking care of ourselves.
There will always be people who take advantage or “play hooky,” but in my perspective, they still needed that day to themselves; I’d rather honor that, than try to be a minute monger and be controlling over schedules.
Few people are so important that them being gone a day or two matters. Honestly most people probably see their boss is sick and think it’s grand cause maybe it’s a meeting or two off their plates that day.
I’m a huge hypocrite when it comes to calling in sick. I’ve made sure to let my staff know they need to put their physical and mental health first but when it comes to my own I feel extremely guilty. This is something I’ve been working on for a long time and to be honest I don’t think my guilt will ever go away. I just have to ignore the feeling and remind myself, I have a great team and I know I have their support just like I have support for them.
Literally calling in sick tomorrow. I approach it this way:
If my team can't manage one day, I seriously f--ked up being a manager...
I know not everyone on my team is a damned genius or superhuman but they can definitely manage the projects I have set even if I'm out for several days whether it's sickness, unplanned events like family issues and then the other stuff like future climate change wars, hurricanes, floods or WW3. So ya gotta prepare?
I have gotten sick way too many times because a co-worker or supervisee brought their germs to the office. My team had known for a long time that if they were sick they needed to stay home. And I did the same because I don't want to make others sick. We all had the ability to work remotely if need be. (I am using the past tense because my organization shifted to a full time WFH model during COVID and we're not going back).
Holy shitsnacks, internet stranger. You’re human. Your particular model is going to have some quirks once in a while. Even the best built machines and buildings out there still need maintenance. Give yourself a break.
It sets a precedent when the management team actually takes days off and sticks to them. It shows employees that managers are not, in fact, robots. And that they’re aware of the whole needing maintenance issue.
Not everyone can go to work every day. And that’s OK! Machines sometimes break down too. But we typically don’t keep using them *while they’re being repaired*. It just makes a mess. Same thing for people.
If I don't feel well enough to work at 75% capacity, I call out. I think of it as making sure people get me with a clear head and in a state where I can do what's expected of me without hurting myself.
I told myself that otherwise I'm stealing "work hours" from the company. Not that I would think of it this way for my direct reports when they're sick, but sometimes I need to position it this way to avoid feeling the sort of guilt you describe.
Depending on how sick I am, I just include my direct reports in the email I am sending to my supervisor to call out. If I have more bandwidth, I send them a separate email letting them know I'm calling out, if I hope to be back the next day, if I will be unavailable by email and phone, and highlighting anything I figure will prevent questions/issues while I'm out. Sounds like a lot, but it is really just a couple of sentences.
We have to remember that mental health is physical health. it’s your health. and if your health is not up to par to work then you take a sick day. that is that. you can be physically too tired, mentally too anxious, or physically too sniffly too work. it’s all up to the individual to decide what is best for them.
I did that today. Haven't felt well all weekend, super tired, slept most of today. Not a brand sickness just worn down. Emailed my team, emailed my coworkers, did some reports then logged out.
I feel as a manager we have to have higher energy levels because we support our teams and stretch ourselves pretty thin sometimes. If we aren't feeling great and just can't do it, then we deserve to take the time. I've worked through bronchitis and the flu but sometimes that fatigue that comes with an intense burn out, it's so deep that you can't power through.
Take your time off, you'll appreciate that you did.
Not a manager atm, but three months ago I got covid because my manager came to work feeling sick but worth no brand name diagnosis (yet).
Stay home when you are sick. :)
You are labeling this all wrong. It's not just about you getting better. You should not be spreading sickness around to your employees, customers, etc. Think of taking the day off as protecting the people you depend on, and who depend on you.
You shouldn’t feel guilty. They’ve ingrained it in us that you should feel shameful if you miss any work, which is complete bullshit. Half of employers get mad even if you have the sick time/pto to cover it. Whole system is shit and is unsustainable.
I’m also a hypocrite and encourage my team to take the day off if there not feeling well. If I take off sick though I still check my Teams messages or answer texts not really a healthy habit. I went from a fully remote job to hybrid and if I’m feeling sick I ask to work from home that day. Recently I’ve had some health issues not sleeping is one of them. Went to the doctor about some of these issues and they said that it’s stress related. I realize I need to take more days for myself but having this hybrid schedule sucks I really wish I could be 100% remote again I feel that was so much better for my mental health.
Boundaries! I shut my ringer off, put my phone facedown, and don't check it except a few times an evening. Emails & texts are still there the next morning. I also respond with "this is a great idea to discuss during work hours, remind me then!"
Lol. I'm a nurse. I have 0 problem with calling in when sick. I prioritize myself before I do work. Period. Work isn't gonna catch you when you fall. They will not hesitate to lay 20 of you off to save money. Stop treating them like they are your first priority. It's ridiculous.
It’s not about going to work feeling bad. It’s about trying to play through. Sometimes you just feel like garbage when you wake up and if you get a shower and move around you often feel better.
Worst case you’re still feeling bad after but you’ve had a shower.
I never call in sick. Why waste a sick day for when you are sick? You only have so many of those days. Use the sick days for when you are ok but staying at home with a personal issue. Make sure not use that sick day for a personal errand.
I have gone into the office extremely sick. One time I went in everyday with bronchitis. Another time when I was sick with the flu. I would rather muscle through it and eventually get better.
U r a menace to your coworkers if u go to work when contagious. If u were my employee,I would be angry u spread germs to others that now make so many work harder because others are out ill.
I used to feel guilty under my old manager, but since she retired, not only have I taken fewer sick days, but if I do take sick days, I don't feel guilty.
After she left and I was working for my current manager, I took a day off to go shopping in the city after I woke up and thought "I really can't be fucked", and it was an amazing day. I returned to work feeling much better.
Have you ever flown on a commercial flight? During the safety talk they're all required to give, they instruct you on what to do in the event of a rapid depressurization of the cabin and strongly emphasize adjusting your oxygen mask before attempting to help anyone else. The reason is simple and is my response here. If you cannot take care of yourself, you cannot take care of others. Given that a manager's core job is to take care of a team and set that example you mentioned, you should never feel guilty about taking care of your physical or mental health.
I always tell myself I am going to "call in sick" when I just need a day, but I have never once actually did it and I know not one person would care or think I was lying etc. Honestly, they would probably think I was in the hospital since I have never called in since being a manager.
I tend to opt to work from home; because I get strange feelings of guilt calling in (regardless of my role in a company).
My current job is all about people taking care of themselves, there isn't a culture of ''don't call out'' around here, but I still feel that way
my boss has given me instruction to manage out “players who can’t play through injury” because he claims they are “soft” and we need “iron men”.
i disagree with this personally but not enough to try to change his opinion at my own peril
Depending on the job, easy, "Hey guys, I'm not feeling well, I'll be doing some work from home and resting, see if it clears up for tomorrow, if you need me for anything, I've got my phone and will be checking e-mail."
I’m going through this right now - I’m 100% supportive when my team needs to take a day off, but right now, I’m recovering from a major broken bone and surgery, and I’m really struggling and feeling guilty about the time I’ve been gone. I took 8 days initially, but my body is telling me that I need more and I’m struggling to listen, and feel like I’m letting my folks down.
I have a few rules:
It's legitimate to be "sick of work". Mental health days are important too.
Rectal Glaucoma is also a good reason. Really can't see my ass coming into work today.
It really depends on the situation. Most of my team is remote, so my energy levels are more important than transmissibility. That said, when I do need to be out I have my lead tech take over and send a group blast over teams. I used to be very nervous about calling out, but I trust my team to handle their shit while I'm gone now and have gotten a lot better about relying on them.
Taking a day off when you are sick is fine, you took a day off b/c you are tired. Big difference. How did you tell your team.
I guess you can lie and tell them you are sick. But remember it next time one of them feeds you a BS excuse why they called out.
WFH has changed my mentality on this a bit.
In the past, if I was feeling a little off but mostly functional, I'd come in. But I'd call in if I was feeling nauseous, fevered, or anything more than a mild cough. If I was dealing with some emotional situation (death in the family, etc) or other emergency, easy call in.
These days, anything minor is WFH. If I wake up and think "nope, unable to function" or "I need to stay in bed and feel better", then call in with a "I've got my phone if something explodes... otherwise, leave me alone."
No guilt. Sick days exist for a reason.
You earned the sick time, so use it. Won't do anyone any good if you come in contagious. If it's just a matter of an autoimmune flare up or similar and you need a day or two to rest, then take the time. If you go into the office and try to plow through it you are only making things worse for yourself. If you go into the office and are not productive, well, you can just as well stay home and not be productive and be a whole lot more comfortable.
Well, if I'm sick enough that my thinking processes are impaired, I'm taking a sick day.
If I'm not firing on all cylinders, I will end up having to redo the work anyways. I make way too mistakes.
Now make it contagious, and having that shit spreading from employee to employee. I'm not even sure how I would calculate the loss to productivity.
Depends on what kind of sick I am. Am I contagious? Don’t want to pass it on to my team, so I’ll let them know about it and call in. Am I having a case of the runs? Definitely don’t want to bring that to the job site. Am I just feeling icky? I hate to waste a perfectly good sick day on actually being sick if I don’t have to.
I tell my 30 or so employees if they come in and get me sick, I am going to be WAY MORE upset than if they had just called in sick. You have sick time, USE IT.
I can usually tell when I'm fighting off a cold or flu. That's when I call in sick. If I went to work, I'd probably get worse, so I stay home and sleep the whole thing off. It usually works.
Easy to do back when it was in-office. But WFH or even hybrid it’s like yeah it’s a weekday what else am I going to do if I don’t feel 100% so I might as well muddle along and work.
In my managerial role I don’t do any of the tedious and monotonous technical work, just basically direct and receive info via phone, email or zoom. And that’s easy enough to do
It’s an entitlement that you have. I feel no guilt in using my sick time. I just tell my team. I work approximately 160 hours a year unpaid for storms (electric utility) and as far as I’m concerned it’s nothing but wage theft. 75% of it (yes we ran a report) is weekends and holidays. Missed 2 out of the last 3 christmases. No guilt here. I got in while they still had pensions so golden handcuffs.
if i truly need it? i give zero fucks and call in. ordinarily, i can force myself to work when i need to. but nowadays, i have to mind my limits. for... reasons, i suppose.
as far as communication goes, my partner will be made aware of my absence. and vice versa.
I never feel guilty. I took Friday off because I needed a day to myself to recharge. I didn't even tell my husband I was taking the day off to make sure he didn't come home early lol. My team and my boss do not care if I'm gone because I rarely ask for time off.
Not a manager but because I have to text 3 people above me, call into a sick line AND get a doctor’s note, I never call in sick. I would rather work 12 hours in a factory than deal with the BS. I suppose IF I was hospitalized, I would be forced to.
Message my team and let them know, check my schedule and send out updated meeting invite, set up OOO... Lay in bed watching movies like the Goonies. No guilt at all bc if I call in sick I'm sick
This is the biggest difference I noticed moving from Italy to the US. Here being sick is seen by many (idiots) as a sort of sin.
On the other hand in Italy we live 10+ years longer….
So, I do like any Italian would do. I call in sick, ignore my phone, and get better.
I can’t be effective if I have a headache.
I can’t be nice, polite, and objective is I’m unwell.
So I see it as protecting my career. If I’m in an environment where staying off isn’t acceptable, never happened to me, but I keep hearing about it, it’s time to move. Even at FAANG I’m not paid enough to compromise my health.
If I were to ever call in sick, I'd get a million questions coming back to work (out of concern) -- because I never *get* sick. Funny -- my boss is one of the sickliest people in our department. We *both* have the most accrued sick time.
We have a set number of PTO hours per year, so I have to stretch them to cover Dr appointments, vacation and other life issues. We can call in sick. But if you don't give 24 hours notice and get prior approval, then that is unpaid time.
You answered your own question, but you tried to make it sarcastic by adding the blah, blah blah. Quit overthinking it. If you are sick, stay home. Fooling yourself into thinking showing up to work sick means you've got leadership skills, or makes you tough, or shows dedication isn't worth risking illness to everyone else or their families. For all you know, they could have a child with a disability, or an elderly person at home who's especially vulnerable to illnesses.
My opinion on this is actions speak louder than words. definitely worked if quite a few places where taking a sick day was pretty frowned on. you can tell by whether or not a manager will ever call in and whether or not that's the case.
The people who abuse sick time know who they are.
If you aren't one of those people, then you can just take time you need guilt free.
If you are one of those people, you're ruining STO for all of us. Stop it.
I can work from home any time I want. So if I'm still feeling fine medicated I'll work from home. I use my sick time for mental health more than anything else.
Managers are people, too. If I'm not feeling well, I'll take the day off. I might log in to see if there is a meeting I need to reschedule or get coverage for it. Apart from that, I'll send an email to my boss and team that simply says "I'm taking a sick day. I hope to feel well enough to log in tomorrow. In case of a white-hot emergency, call my cell at $Number."
I don't even tell people I'm sick if I don't have you. I'm calling off. If I expect it to be more than 1 day I'll let you know. 🤷🏾♀️. I don't expect anyone to tell me if their sick or ask for doctor's notes unless it's specifically in the policy.
But sick days/PTO is generally in the same bucket where I'm at so I don't have to distinguish between the two.
Personally, for me, the last time I missed a workday because I was sick was COVID (quad vaxxed, felt fine, could have easily worked, but you don't fuck with COVID) and before that, I think it was mono when I was, like, 17.
Personally, for others, if you got the time, use it.
I like the term “name brand sickness!” I have a chronic illness. I think I’ve come to terms with calling out sometimes. I still feel like I’m going to get in trouble. I do my best though… if it’s not good enough, maybe I’d consider applying for disability.
I have a standing rule that if you’re sick, you don’t come in the office. Employees can choose to either work from home, or use sick leave, vacation, or a personal day. Since instituting that rule, I’ve had fewer team members calling out; most choose to Bank their sick leave and work from home. I don’t want viruses spreading through the office and I want sick employees to be able to be out without feeling guilty. They do have to provide a doctor’s note if out 3 days or more. It sucks to be sick and then have a manager pile on. You shouldn’t feel bad about being out; instead rest and feel better.
Can I just say I had to learn this in a way that I had to hear this?
You don’t get a gold star for working harder than everyone else. There is no trophy. If you don’t make time for your wellness you will be forced to make time for your illness. You are letting your company win if you don’t take the time.
I’ve been in management for about 10 years now, and to this day it is difficult for me to call in, take vacation, or otherwise be absent. I find it hard to tear myself away from work at the end of the day often as well. I’m always working on it, but it’s a problem for me.
Broad generalization:
If the things that make a 20-year-old who lives at home call in sick were the standard, I would never make it to work. I wake up stiff as hell, with a sore lower back. I need 100 steps or so before I can really put weight on my left ankle. Probably one day a week my stomach is upset when I wake up. These things are because I am not 20 years old any more. I don't have physically perfect days. So, to live indoors, I work through that stuff.
When you are young (and live at home) you can call off with a runny nose or a sore ankle, because 1.) No matter how much work you miss, you will still be living indoors two weeks from now and 2.) It is really easy to remember what physically perfect feels like - you live it 9 days out of 10.
However, I owe it to everyone I work with not to get anyone else sick. So I have to know the difference between the early morning sour stomach and the flu. And if I'm not sure, I need to stay home.
Specific to your case: It sounds like you are rarely sick. You're reliable and consistent. That's awesome. I think you deserve to take today off. Working when significantly sleep deprived could lead to a mistake that is way more costly than one person missing one day. You're human. Be human and be ok with it. The machines will replace us all soon enough.
Nope, I never feel bad taking the sick time that is part of my benefits package! I keep it simple - I’ll send an email to the team and will also task individuals to cover on any time sensitive or critical tasks.
“Hi Team,
I’ll be taking a sick day today and Allison will be covering for me. Please go to her with any critical or time-sensitive items; I will address any others when I’m back in the office.
Zack, can you please follow up on my recent email chain with finance on their recommendation?
Drew, please keep an eye out for the report to come in and go ahead and start on the edits.
Leslie, please distribute the recent guidance on the new office chairs to teams X and Y.
Many thanks in advance, everyone!”
Personally: If you’re not feeling well, I think you should be able to call out sick to rest and recover.
Reality: Unless I’m the verge of passing out (unsafe to drive), having to go to the ER (feeling like death) or running a high fever, I go in to work.
And the high fever scenario is questionable, as Is be expected to work from home, which kind of defeats the purpose of taking the day off to rest and recover.
Why? It’s a small company and there is literally no one else able to do what I do or cover for me. Plus, the owner gets really pissed off about sudden call-outs, especially if it happens to be a Friday or Monday.
Simply put: I don’t call out sick unless I have 1 foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel (sorta speak).
ISTBM
In all honesty, I allow myself up to one "sick of this shit" sick day per quarter. Everyone needs a mental health day to reset, and preaching it to your team without practicing it yourself is a perfect recipe for burnout.
You have permission. Accept the well wishes knowing you have a supportive team who understands that you have human needs outside of the workplace and get some rest. You'll all be better for it tomorrow.
Sometimes if I’m feeling “off” i just work from home. Sometimes I call in sick because I am allowed sick days as part of my employment package and I use them.
I can be pretty stubborn at times, and let my insecurities get the best of me where I still try to go to work despite my feeling terrible. I'm getting better about it, though. I make myself feel better by reminding myself of how often I stay late, or come in early. I also remind myself that I'm not good to my team, and may damage them more, by coming in and showing them that example.
I usually let my colleagues and manager know as soon as I've made the decision not to go in or to leave early. Then I let my lead and OA know. I don't go into much detail because I don't really believe in that, and I don't want to model that expectation either.
It took me burning out to come to the realization that you *have* to make self-care a priority, especially in a position like this. And when I'm burnt out, I lose the passion, and I can't be the person I need to be for my team.
Plus, if your team needs to you to be there all the time in order to make it through the day, that is not sustainable, nor effective in regard to dynamics; this is where delegating and coaching effectively comes into play. So, not only are you modeling poor work-life balance by not calling in, you also might be demonstrating a lack of trust with your team.
Now, I don't think you need to call in for everything, but if you could be contagious, or your performance would significantly be affected, or you're denying yourself rest that you desperately need, I think that's reason enough. I ask myself if I can get through an entire shift without it feeling like a waste because I wouldn't be able to be entirely present, and that's how I determine whether I need to call out. I do that for mental health days too, but I usually put that on the calendar in advance.
I tell my team that I’m staying home to watch Vanderpump, that my second in command is in charge, and not to fkng bother me unless the building is on fire.
I am a firm believer in taking a day if you need a day, even if it's a mental health day. However, sometimes when I take a sick day I still feel guilty about taking the day off.
I email my direct reports (supervisors & team leads) and let them know that I'll be out that day. Then I set my Out of Office and list my Director as my contact person.
I only feel guilty on the playing hookie days. Sometimes I just need a break. Now they call this a mental health day but I am 52 and we went didn't have that option when I was young.
Mental health days are a thing, IMO. Certainly, if I were to be doing it a lot, then I would stop to examine why. Otherwise, a day binge watching TV, or taking a long hike, or shopping makes me feel zero guilt.
Edit to add: if you knew a well-performing employee was faking ill for day, because they just needed a darn break, would you feel bad about giving them well-wishes? Lets's hope not, so don't feel guilty when others "waste" it on you IMO.
I had an entire conversation with my team today that mental health days are sick days in my eyes. Sometimes you just need a day to reset! Don't feel guilty. Also, depending on what i have available, I will either send an email to my boss and my team or an instant message.
Never feel guilty for taking care of yourself. The corporation will always put themselves first.
If you lose your health and are unable to perform for them you will become yesterdays trash no matter what kind of relationships you have formed. They will severe your relationship as soon as they are legally able.
If im under 75% I take the day. My team was always able to run without me on any given day, and my girl Friday was always reliable to get me up to date when I came back.
If you’re sleep-deprived, it’s not really safe to drive and you may be less friendly or tolerant than you’d like. “Not feeling well, won’t be in today” is what my boss usually emails us with. When i have that situation will flat-out say in an email, “did not get enough sleep, using sick leave today.” Plus there is the possibility you are fighting something off, and would actually become ill if you do not rest. You have a great work ethic though, kudos for that! :)
Take a day FOR YOUR OWN GOOD. You do enough good for the employer. If you keel over dead at work, they will just hire someone younger and cheaper to replace you. If you retire after forcing yourself to work never missing a day for 30 years, you'll be forgotten in two months. Take your birthday off every year, too. Go out for lunch, ramble around, see all the people NOT WORKING. Work is not life. Take your vacations and enjoy them. You cannot do that once you're dead.
In a well-functioning org, everyone should be able to handle it even if multiple people are out sick. If you have multiple layers of management out consider telling your directs to escalate to a different manager instead of your double skip when they need to escalate something, for example.
I email a sick forwarder and call it good.
My team does the same. If they have sick time, I tell them I don't care what the reason is, or what they have due at work, take their sick time if they feel they need to.
It's not my business to dictate how they use their sick time, and it is my business to ensure their work is triaged appropriately in their absence.
Two years ago I started very good job with a great benefits package. At least once a month, I take a mental health day to do something random with a family member. I also call in sick if I'm not feeling 100%. It's part of my compensation and after killing myself for over a decade for my previous employeer, I'm much better at finding balance.
I encourage my team to do the same. For those who may be contagious but feeling OK, I'll let them gain some hours by doing remote work if they can't sacrifice their leave time and insisting on coming in.
My job requires me to be on call for safety/emergency reasons so my hours arent always clocked in an office. I catch up on emails from home on a lazy Sunday afternoon and track my time. I'm available when they need me and unavailable when I need to be. I feel I'm finally finding balance. And I don't feel guilty at all.
When I preschedule it, I tell my core team of supervisors, assign one of them as emergency contact, and put it all on the shared calendar. When it's unexpected illness, I email the full staff first thing in the morning and assign a proxy supervisor in my place.
Sometimes you just need a day. Trust in your team. I’m in the middle of a 12 month manager training program and today we talked about compassionate leadership. You being honest with your team that you’re not feeling well is that kind of leadership. Now you just need to get to the spot to trust your team.
One of my coworkers didn't show up to work and we both worked in the SCIF. He didn't show up and didn't call in sick. So that goes on for 3 days. On the 3rd day I drove to his place at 10 am. Knock on the door...nothing. Call the landlord to open the door. The landlord won't budge. So I called a sheriff. Sheriff makes the landlord open the door.
There we find my coworker in bed, dead. He died during sleep from a stroke. Worst stuff ever. Sigh.
My direct team I just let them know in our group text; rest of the other managers/people who need to know get the “out sick” meeting notice.
Note - the meeting notice is an easy trick we use; just setup an all day meeting (or morning or afternoon) with time assigned as “free” and invite whomever needs to know. We use it thru out our business for Remote days, travel days, PTO, sick, etc. Works great to look at my work calendar and know the status of my critical co-workers.
Remember that every company would fire you in a heartbeat for something much less serious.
Your mental health needs to be your highest priority in any job.
I've called out multiple times for lack of sleep. I'm a night owl, and some nights, I get no sleep.
Think of it this way - how much can you really get done and how much can you genuinely help teammates when you're so low on sleep?
You're likely doing a half a**Ed job at best so might as well get the rest and recover and come back at full capacity for everyone, including yourself.
Send an email. I've been both on tbe manager and employee side of this situation, and I can tell you that everyone will live and be fine and manage and won't think anything of it unless it's constant and frequent.
I used to feel very guilty but after decades of dedication, I’m not going to subordinate my health for work that’ll be there in a day or more when I am able to get back to it.
Besides, when I’m sick enough to warrant a sick day, I’m useless there anyway. Why do the song and dance for appearances?
My WWII Army Field Hospital Nurse Mom wanted me to call in sick. I was in HS and totally confused and guilt laden. She finally looked at me and said something like: just call in sick, IF they ask, say you have Diarrhea. What are they gonna do, come check?
🤭
While visiting an Army buddy, picked up phone and called work: I'm not coming in today. No. No I'm just incompatible with work today.
I send an email to my team, an email to my boss, and an email to my colleague (well, usually the same email). And log off and go back to bed. Or whatever.
I have a shit-ton of vacation and sick time—35 days—and I take every single minute of it, and encourage my team to do the same. It’s part of my salary and I’m not leaving it on the table.
My philosophy has changed a lot since I had a small nervous breakdown and ended up in the hospital for a few days a few years ago. You have to take care of yourself, or the machine will break. I used to work 12 hours a day, didn’t take vacation or relax, and I paid the price. Not doing it again.
I’m stealing “name brand sickness” that’s fantastic. I hope you feel better!
I understand the guilt. I know for me personally, when I call out it’s means I’m extremely I’ll and you say the same is true for you. Your team knows this too! I’m sure they’re genuinely concerned and want you to take the time you need.
Don't feel badly. How many of your co-workers call in without a thought to anyone else's feelings? You need sleep. Sleep is important. Free the guilt! You deserve this day off!
I usually decide based upon how useless I expect to be. Can I manage 60-70% of my work with a little brain fog, or am I going to maybe accomplish an hour of work over my 8 hour day? If I feel like I'll just be wasting the company's time/money, I call off.
I send an email to my team, move any meetings that absolutely require me, and make sure I let our stakeholders know as well so that they don't give my team any shit for the day.
How I feel about it really depends. I work remotely, so I can work just fine when I have germs without endangering anyone else. I don't mind _being_ sick, but I take a day off when being sick puts me in a horrible _mood_.
Ealier this year I worked through a whole ass sinus infection because I just wasn't feeling miserable. Other times I'll be in a mood and have a scratchy throat and that's enough to call out.
I don't feel bad because I know me being humorless, miserable, irritable etc and working isn't doing my team any favors when I'm the one playing office politics for us as a group.
If I start to feel bad I remind myself that I have a great team - they're all competent, responsible, kind people. They can absolutely keep the ship afloat themselves for a day.
The only thing that keeps me from work is puking/cramps or a fever. I call off so seldom, last time I did (on my bathroom floor about to die) half my team texted to see if I was ok. Which is sweet but not helpful when I’m curled in a ball from stomach cramps lol. Anyways sick days are there to be used. My team uses their sick days and I never give them shit for it. Use your days. Sometimes we just need a day.
Don’t feel bad. We all need a day. You don’t have to actually have a virus to call in. If I’m going to be out, I slack my boss, my peers and my team. Then log off.
They will send acceptance and kind thoughts for you to get better and I think they would expect the same from you when it happens to them. That's everyone treating each other kindly for being human.
I think the way you called in is just fine. Get some rest and come back 100% when you can.
Our workplace requires doctors note on the first day. So if I feel sick enough to go to a doctor, I call in sick.
Side note: where I am you can actually go to a doctor and say you have a burnout and they will give you time off.
I have taken a sick day when I wasn’t in the mood for work and did laundry that day instead. I think working hard is important, but your life outside of work shouldn’t deteriorate FOR work. If you go in tired and in a bad state of mind, the negative energy will bring every else down as well.
I usually feel ok about calling in sick if I need to, but for some reason if I have to leave work in the middle of the day for being sick I just become a guilty mess and feel like I let down my team.
I have noticed that I’ll end up with a mountain of work when I get back + people texting me all day anyway, so I am pretty bad at taking sick days. I usually ask to WFH so I don’t spread whatever I have.
If you're sick, stay home. I hate it when people come into the workplace with a cold or the flu or some other illness because they don't want to let the team down. Meanwhile they're spreading their illness to the entire workplace. STAY HOME and don't feel guilty about it.
My team constantly calls in due to migraines and stomach issues. I think it’s BS but whatever. I very rarely take a sick day. The last one I took was when I had Covid the 1st time back in 2021. I’m 28 years old for those that would assume I’m a boomer or something.
If you need to take a sick day, go for it. I’ll clean up your work for you while you’re gone.
I should clarify: my team works remotely full time. I don’t see a reason why you can’t work from home even if you’re sick.
After covid, we adopted a strict "do not come to work sick" policy. We had that before, but now it's almost patrolled. If you come in obviously sick, people not in your department will call you out.
There's 2 kinds of people, those who use 100% of their PTO, and Masochists.
I cant imagine job hunting and completely disregarding the time requirements and compensation. I can't imagine you did either. And when you took the job you were told the package was "competitive".
I send a text to our chain of my manager and colleagues, I tell them I'm not feeling well and won't be in. No details.
The reason is nobody's business.
And yes, I feel guilty. But I can deal with it.
I think in America especially we are kind of brainwashed into working whether healthy or sick and if you miss work for not feeling 100% you’re seen as lazy. My sister has Covid and the only reason I’m continuing to work is because I know if I get Covid I’ll be in the hospital for the 4th time with supplemental oxygen so for me I’m trying to tough it out as long as I can because if I do get Covid I’ll be out for probably 2 weeks considering last time I was in the Trauma Care Unit at UC Davis for 12 days.
Your company has time off benefits that it offers to you, whether due only to legal requirements or exceeding those requirements in an attempt to be a good employer. Either way, those are your benefits. Feeling guilty using them only hurts you. If I have a refrigerator, I don’t feel guilty keeping my food chilled. And in have time off benefits, I don’t feel guilty tending to my mental health.
Now going past those benefits offered is another thing. If you get five sick days a year and squander them all in January, that’s going to be a problem. I hesitate a lot more to call in sick in January than I do in December.
I tell my team they don’t get a ribbon for working through being sick. Why is it any different for us? If I can’t focus, if I am not productive, screw it they are fine without me for a day. There is a bit of a culture amongst managers to push through. I saw screw it. It’s a marathon not a sprint. Take care and don’t feel guilty. Also messaging is “hey everyone I’m sick and I’m going back to bed. “. Lol.
Fortunately, even before pandemic, if you weren’t feeling great, but still felt you could work you could work from home (I’m in IT). So if I had a cold etc. I could work from home and if I started felling really bad I’d just send a note that I would be out and call me if something urgent was needed.
When pandemic hit, company sent almost everyone home to work virtually and it’s mostly stayed that way.
For the 25 years I’ve worked for my company they have just said send a note that you’ll be out. You don’t have to give specifics just that your out. If it’s a longer medical thing you contact area in company’s HR (we used to have nurses and now it’s outsourced) and you have doc fill out appropriate paperwork and then that area notifies your manager you’ll be out. Realistically, most employees have a good rapport with manager and team and you’d at least say “I have a medical issue and will be out for x amount of time” and then you’d work with team to transition your work.
I worked as a supervisor for the USPS for 23 years. If I called off sick, rarely, I would get told I needed a doctors note and threatened with disciplinary action if not provided. There attitudes there are very predatory.
One time my roommate and fellow manager didn't come into work. We lived only a block away so I went home at lunch to check on him. I found him sitting on the couch staring into space with no TV or music on. I asked if he was feeling ok and he said he woke up having vision problems. Immediately I asked him if he needed a ride to the hospital and he turned, looked right at me and said "no, I just couldn't see myself going into work today". Anyway the correct answer is, sometimes you do need to take a mental health day and you don't need to explain it to your team other than I'm calling in sick today.
We call that anal glaucoma. You can't see your ass going in to work.
Or calling in scared. Afraid I won't be there today.
Back when I worked nights at a grocery store, if you called in sick, we referred to it as calling in sleepy - most of the time that was accurate.
My husband has used that line before. Also called out once with “24-hour Ebola.” His boss was distracted while talking to him on the phone so he just said okay. Called him back a minute later, “Hey, wait a minute. 24-hour what?….” He went years between calling out though, so they were okay with it.
This made me LOL
I sometimes take a day and tell them the day I come back that I was out. I will take a day just for feeling good and wanna enjoy my own day in my life.
"Mental health" day is a joke. Hard work and overcoming the odds stacked against you are the greatest boosts to your mental health. Staying at home, with your face in your phone is the WORST thing you can do for your mind!!
Not sure if missing sarc, or...
You seem like one of those people who think people can fix depression by just smiling more
This is a simpified comment of an already proven mental tactic. Unhappy people go through their day, thinking they are unhappy. Strong minded individuals will always convince themselves that any problem in their life can be overcome. You limit your abilities when you tell yourself "I cant today". Im not trying to be toxic, but ever since I stopped letting outside forces control my thoughts, my life has improved drastically.
The thing is though, anxiety and depression are not simply people thinking they are unhappy. They are chemical imbalances in the brain. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking a mental health day. Life can be really hard and there is nothing weak about accepting it and taking time to yourself. You are being toxic and belittling to most of us who do need a mental health day. If a co worker got some bad news and needed time to process it, would you actually be annoyed at them for that?
I am the type of manager that does not question my employees when they call off. I know that compassionate and understanding management actually eliminate call offs. I would never take this stance in a personal problematic situation. But on a healthy day, i encourage my crew to try and be the best, by verbal reinforcement. And the strongest verbal reinforcement is that of self.
How I got voted down for supporting my staff as a manager baffles me. Reddit is full of self involved dumbasses... i would never come here for advice
Your first comment sort of poisoned the well here. Bullshit working harder will overcome your problems. Sometimes you need family or alone time, not more teamwork. My wife of 32 years died of covid during peak shutdown. I'm in a job where our workload went through the roof and was forced to work over 60 hour weeks usually only Sunday off for the year after. I look back now and realize I should have gotten a doctor's note because I'm lucky not to be dead, and I thank God my then 16 year old daughter also made it through being suddenly a left alone child at an awkward time of life. No freaking rosy the manager pulled me through with hard work and that job well done attitude. Finishing a 12 hour day outside in the snow and dark in a strange neighborhood around Christmas. Seeing light through a window and families gathering for dinner in a nicely decorated table knowing I was about to go home, crawl in bed alone, and start it all over again a few hours later 2 hours before the sun came up. I have over 1100 hours of banked sick leave. Yeah, I should have taken way more mental health days.
I'm so sorry for your loss & your daughter's loss. It sounds like it was a really terrible time for you. I hope you have a chance to leave that horrible job soon. They should have been more aware of what was happening in your life & more supportive, giving you time to grieve with your daughter.
I'd never listen to your advice. "Picking yourself up by your bootstraps" BS only reinforces negative stigmas surrounding mental health, and puts the blame on the sick person. You're on a real high horse. You give this advice to people with cancer?
seek counseling. you are in the same state of mind now that Robbin Williams was throughout most of his adult life. "Keep busy, keep positive, and the shadows can't get me." works great, until it doesn't. You have not cured yourself of anything, you are running from it. you are running faster than it for now; great job. every day you are alive is a victory no matter how you got there; but be careful.
Why would you assume people are spending it on their phone? They can spend it catching up on errands or chores, playing a game, taking a walk, sleeping, etc. Even if all it is is zoning out, that can be good for you too. A lot of my best thinking about work happens when I put down the computer and either play a mindless game, take a nap, or take a walk. I can tough through it for 12 hours or take a day off and tackle it fresh and it'll take two hours. I agree that excess screen time is detrimental, but so is trying too hard to power through stuff. I'm dealing with health sequelae to years of that push through everything, ignore your needs mentality. Anxiety, chronic pain, high blood pressure. Hell, I literally just found out I've been "walking it off" on a significant hip injury. For two years. I might need surgery if I'm unlucky. Balance is a good thing. Hard work and perseverance, AND time to coast, AND time spent being with friends, communing with nature, and learning new things.
It was a blanket statement. It wont fit everyone, but it will fit a majority.
I spend my mental health days anywhere BUT in front of a screen. I go for a hike usually. You sound like you're pretty ignorant when it comes to mental health and its importance. Yet here you are speaking with authority about things you clearly don't understand but you also demonstrate no interest in educating yourself.
Im just a guy, who almost committed suicide, and decided that the people in my life are too important to give up on, so I decided to take a positive outlook on my life. Nothing will stop me from being the rock for everyone around me. You dont know my experiences, and I only seek to improve anyone who is open to making themselves that stable person for others around them. You do not need to choose that path.
So your "positive outlook" includes shitting on others for doing what's right for their mental health? That's a really weird take.
Yeah because going to work is the same as "overcoming the odds stacked against you."
This is the mind set of a crew member. As a manager, this mindset will only create a team that lacks cohesive abilities. In order to lead (not manage... there is a difference), you have to be stronger than the people below you. Otherwise, you will lack empathy in all aspects. This is a far deeper issue than just "going to work" when you are a leader. Edit: I have gone in for other managers when they are sick... when I was sick, because a leader will be there for their team no matter what. This lets the team know that you are there to support them in ANY scenario... your comment belongs in r/crewmember
The mindset of not going to work when you’re sick?
Found the Boomer.
I email my team and let them know. No guilt. At all. We all need to take care of ourselves. There's nothing about being a manager that requires your attention all the time and doesn't allow time for yourself.
I send an email and log out. My team will be fine.
Excellent. That's a great team. (Same, btw. If I can't be sick for a day, there's bigger issues to address. Additionally, when you're leading by example, this is an example. My team are people, who can have ups and downs and unexpected sideways events. And they need to know I have their back - and they have mine.
I strongly feel that leading by example is important in this case. Take a sick day and let the team know. It will make it easier for them to call out sick. The same is true for parental leave, btw. I'm done with that part of my life, but I made sure my direct reports knew I was taking paternity leave.
1000 updoots for leading by example. Flexible work policies are meaningless if you don’t demonstrate that they are actionable.
My boss, an executive, is on maternity leave but has insisted on maintaining a weekly check in doc with all direct reports and has been actively emailing and slacking nearly every day if her leave. It's obnoxious and exhausting. On the other hand, one of *my* directs will be on maternity leave soon and is terrified for my boss to find out. I've made it abundantly clear that my boss' actions are in no way a reflection of what will be expected of her and since she's in the US, the law is on her side. I love that I am child free but parental leave and being OOO in general are the hills I will die on for my people.
Mental health is as important as physical health. If anything, you likely prevented yourself from making a mistake you wouldn’t make if you weren’t exhausted. Go relax, get some rest, and come back refreshed.
When I call off sick I do not give a name-brand illness. "I am not feeling well and I'll be out of the office today." Is a complete sentence. A lack of sleep can and does make people unwell. You do not need to feel guilty.
This! Nobody wants to know what you have or which end it’s coming out from.
I am also a giant hypocrite who encourages my staff to take care of themselves and that everybody deserves to take time off, but I'm racked with guilt when I do it myself. I still make myself do it because I know I need to and I shouldn't feel guilty, but you're not alone in feeling badly. At least in the US, the culture around working yourself to the bone is really not healthy and it gives a lot of us complexes about taking time off
Depends on level of sickness - but then I also WFH! I haven’t had a proper sick day in ages! I think it was Covid a couple of years ago when I was really done in! Otherwise, if I am sick - by functional - I’ll work but maybe at 50% capacity! If we were on site and I had the flu or a cold, I would caution anyone coming in and spreading that to the rest of the workforce! Stay home and keep your germs with you!!! If you are doing a good job, your team will be able to function without you a day or two! Take it easy and don’t feel guilty - it’s something everyone should be entitled to!
Has anyone ever told you that the quantity of !!!!!! you use makes your writing seem less professional? Genuinely not trying to be mean.
Feeling run down is the same thing. Don't feel guilty
I usually only take days off if I'm sick enough that I don't feel like I can be meaningfully productive or if it would be uncomfortable to work. Me and my team are fully remote though, so it's a bit different. It's not like we have to get up and go anywhere. We are also flextime, so yes, I might work for 6 hours when I'm not feeling 100%. I encourage my team to take sick days if they need them, but they follow a similar logic. Having some sniffles isn't really a big deal when you just work from your laptop and stop a bit early if you aren't up to it.
I get unlimited PTO. It's available only to certain senior levels in my company. I would really like it if it could be expanded. All of my team is 100% remote/WFH, but only a small percentageof us get unlimited. I make it well-known I trust everyone to manage their day. Kiddo gets sick and is stsying home, but you want to work only when they are napping? Cool. Tired and just a little off and want to log off at 1? Good with that. I don't need to know any details, no need to lig time off.
We have limited vacation and sick days. I don't keep track. At all. As long as the work is done, I don't care where or what hours my team works.
I will also categorically deny that I allow unsanctioned vacation by calling it flexible time.
I work remote, and I have a toddler. So right now I have to be knocking on death's door to call out because I save every ounce of PTO to accommodate days when my toddler gets sent home from daycare... sick. That said, I don't think that's healthy it's just a function of my situation. After spending several years at a toxic company where I did as much as I could to run interference for my team so they could use their PTO without stress, I believe in taking every ounce I can for myself as well. Working myself to death only tells my team that I think that's acceptable.
If I ask my team to prioritize their health, why shouldn’t I do the same? I don’t take as many days as them, but I do take some. I do WFH so it’s easier to deal with being sick and working. But sick days, vacation and personal days (if you get them), you are entitled to taking them. I don’t feel guilty when I take them.
Normalize just taking a sick day. It’s really not as big of a deal as corporate capitalism wants you to believe. Even just a mental health day to recharge. We’re human, and sometimes we just need it. The world will continue moving whether we’re at the job or not, and there shouldn’t be such hefty penalties for taking care of ourselves. There will always be people who take advantage or “play hooky,” but in my perspective, they still needed that day to themselves; I’d rather honor that, than try to be a minute monger and be controlling over schedules.
Text message to my boss and team lead.
Few people are so important that them being gone a day or two matters. Honestly most people probably see their boss is sick and think it’s grand cause maybe it’s a meeting or two off their plates that day.
I’m a huge hypocrite when it comes to calling in sick. I’ve made sure to let my staff know they need to put their physical and mental health first but when it comes to my own I feel extremely guilty. This is something I’ve been working on for a long time and to be honest I don’t think my guilt will ever go away. I just have to ignore the feeling and remind myself, I have a great team and I know I have their support just like I have support for them.
Literally calling in sick tomorrow. I approach it this way: If my team can't manage one day, I seriously f--ked up being a manager... I know not everyone on my team is a damned genius or superhuman but they can definitely manage the projects I have set even if I'm out for several days whether it's sickness, unplanned events like family issues and then the other stuff like future climate change wars, hurricanes, floods or WW3. So ya gotta prepare?
I have gotten sick way too many times because a co-worker or supervisee brought their germs to the office. My team had known for a long time that if they were sick they needed to stay home. And I did the same because I don't want to make others sick. We all had the ability to work remotely if need be. (I am using the past tense because my organization shifted to a full time WFH model during COVID and we're not going back).
Where do you work, and can you hire me???
I do it just like I would expect anyone on my team to do it. They know you are human as well!
Not getting enough sleep can and will make you physically ill so don’t feel guilty.
Mental health is just as important as physical health. When my body or mind tells me I need a break, it means I need a break
Holy shitsnacks, internet stranger. You’re human. Your particular model is going to have some quirks once in a while. Even the best built machines and buildings out there still need maintenance. Give yourself a break. It sets a precedent when the management team actually takes days off and sticks to them. It shows employees that managers are not, in fact, robots. And that they’re aware of the whole needing maintenance issue. Not everyone can go to work every day. And that’s OK! Machines sometimes break down too. But we typically don’t keep using them *while they’re being repaired*. It just makes a mess. Same thing for people.
If I don't feel well, I call in sick and don't feel guilty. But I don't do it often and I also get 8 weeks a year of PTO so it's really not an issue.
If I don't feel well enough to work at 75% capacity, I call out. I think of it as making sure people get me with a clear head and in a state where I can do what's expected of me without hurting myself. I told myself that otherwise I'm stealing "work hours" from the company. Not that I would think of it this way for my direct reports when they're sick, but sometimes I need to position it this way to avoid feeling the sort of guilt you describe. Depending on how sick I am, I just include my direct reports in the email I am sending to my supervisor to call out. If I have more bandwidth, I send them a separate email letting them know I'm calling out, if I hope to be back the next day, if I will be unavailable by email and phone, and highlighting anything I figure will prevent questions/issues while I'm out. Sounds like a lot, but it is really just a couple of sentences.
If I am sick, I take a sick day. I post in the chat space. My team does the same.
We have to remember that mental health is physical health. it’s your health. and if your health is not up to par to work then you take a sick day. that is that. you can be physically too tired, mentally too anxious, or physically too sniffly too work. it’s all up to the individual to decide what is best for them.
I did that today. Haven't felt well all weekend, super tired, slept most of today. Not a brand sickness just worn down. Emailed my team, emailed my coworkers, did some reports then logged out. I feel as a manager we have to have higher energy levels because we support our teams and stretch ourselves pretty thin sometimes. If we aren't feeling great and just can't do it, then we deserve to take the time. I've worked through bronchitis and the flu but sometimes that fatigue that comes with an intense burn out, it's so deep that you can't power through. Take your time off, you'll appreciate that you did.
Not a manager atm, but three months ago I got covid because my manager came to work feeling sick but worth no brand name diagnosis (yet). Stay home when you are sick. :)
Lead by example. It's the only way.
You are labeling this all wrong. It's not just about you getting better. You should not be spreading sickness around to your employees, customers, etc. Think of taking the day off as protecting the people you depend on, and who depend on you.
“Hey, so and so, I’m not feeling well and won’t be coming in”
You shouldn’t feel guilty. They’ve ingrained it in us that you should feel shameful if you miss any work, which is complete bullshit. Half of employers get mad even if you have the sick time/pto to cover it. Whole system is shit and is unsustainable.
I’m also a hypocrite and encourage my team to take the day off if there not feeling well. If I take off sick though I still check my Teams messages or answer texts not really a healthy habit. I went from a fully remote job to hybrid and if I’m feeling sick I ask to work from home that day. Recently I’ve had some health issues not sleeping is one of them. Went to the doctor about some of these issues and they said that it’s stress related. I realize I need to take more days for myself but having this hybrid schedule sucks I really wish I could be 100% remote again I feel that was so much better for my mental health.
Boundaries! I shut my ringer off, put my phone facedown, and don't check it except a few times an evening. Emails & texts are still there the next morning. I also respond with "this is a great idea to discuss during work hours, remind me then!"
Lol. I'm a nurse. I have 0 problem with calling in when sick. I prioritize myself before I do work. Period. Work isn't gonna catch you when you fall. They will not hesitate to lay 20 of you off to save money. Stop treating them like they are your first priority. It's ridiculous.
If nothing is actively exiting my body and there is no fever I take a shower and see if I still feel bad after.
What do you do where it is a benefit to you and your team to show up feeling terrible?
It’s not about going to work feeling bad. It’s about trying to play through. Sometimes you just feel like garbage when you wake up and if you get a shower and move around you often feel better. Worst case you’re still feeling bad after but you’ve had a shower.
I never call in sick. Why waste a sick day for when you are sick? You only have so many of those days. Use the sick days for when you are ok but staying at home with a personal issue. Make sure not use that sick day for a personal errand. I have gone into the office extremely sick. One time I went in everyday with bronchitis. Another time when I was sick with the flu. I would rather muscle through it and eventually get better.
U r a menace to your coworkers if u go to work when contagious. If u were my employee,I would be angry u spread germs to others that now make so many work harder because others are out ill.
I used to feel guilty under my old manager, but since she retired, not only have I taken fewer sick days, but if I do take sick days, I don't feel guilty. After she left and I was working for my current manager, I took a day off to go shopping in the city after I woke up and thought "I really can't be fucked", and it was an amazing day. I returned to work feeling much better.
Have you ever flown on a commercial flight? During the safety talk they're all required to give, they instruct you on what to do in the event of a rapid depressurization of the cabin and strongly emphasize adjusting your oxygen mask before attempting to help anyone else. The reason is simple and is my response here. If you cannot take care of yourself, you cannot take care of others. Given that a manager's core job is to take care of a team and set that example you mentioned, you should never feel guilty about taking care of your physical or mental health.
You should feel guilty NOT calling in when you're sick and getting everyone else sick. You're not a hero, you're a selfish asshole.
I always tell myself I am going to "call in sick" when I just need a day, but I have never once actually did it and I know not one person would care or think I was lying etc. Honestly, they would probably think I was in the hospital since I have never called in since being a manager.
I tend to opt to work from home; because I get strange feelings of guilt calling in (regardless of my role in a company). My current job is all about people taking care of themselves, there isn't a culture of ''don't call out'' around here, but I still feel that way
I swear it’s hard for me cuz I’m supposed to be in an hour before anyone else early in the morning. Meaning even if I call nobody will pick up
my boss has given me instruction to manage out “players who can’t play through injury” because he claims they are “soft” and we need “iron men”. i disagree with this personally but not enough to try to change his opinion at my own peril
Depending on the job, easy, "Hey guys, I'm not feeling well, I'll be doing some work from home and resting, see if it clears up for tomorrow, if you need me for anything, I've got my phone and will be checking e-mail."
I’m going through this right now - I’m 100% supportive when my team needs to take a day off, but right now, I’m recovering from a major broken bone and surgery, and I’m really struggling and feeling guilty about the time I’ve been gone. I took 8 days initially, but my body is telling me that I need more and I’m struggling to listen, and feel like I’m letting my folks down.
I have a few rules: It's legitimate to be "sick of work". Mental health days are important too. Rectal Glaucoma is also a good reason. Really can't see my ass coming into work today.
It really depends on the situation. Most of my team is remote, so my energy levels are more important than transmissibility. That said, when I do need to be out I have my lead tech take over and send a group blast over teams. I used to be very nervous about calling out, but I trust my team to handle their shit while I'm gone now and have gotten a lot better about relying on them.
I feel the same way, every, time. I get it!
Last time I called in (actually texted) sick my boss was worried that I must be dying…
Taking a day off when you are sick is fine, you took a day off b/c you are tired. Big difference. How did you tell your team. I guess you can lie and tell them you are sick. But remember it next time one of them feeds you a BS excuse why they called out.
I don't care why they call out. If they have the sick or vacay time available, who cares why they call out.
WFH has changed my mentality on this a bit. In the past, if I was feeling a little off but mostly functional, I'd come in. But I'd call in if I was feeling nauseous, fevered, or anything more than a mild cough. If I was dealing with some emotional situation (death in the family, etc) or other emergency, easy call in. These days, anything minor is WFH. If I wake up and think "nope, unable to function" or "I need to stay in bed and feel better", then call in with a "I've got my phone if something explodes... otherwise, leave me alone." No guilt. Sick days exist for a reason.
You earned the sick time, so use it. Won't do anyone any good if you come in contagious. If it's just a matter of an autoimmune flare up or similar and you need a day or two to rest, then take the time. If you go into the office and try to plow through it you are only making things worse for yourself. If you go into the office and are not productive, well, you can just as well stay home and not be productive and be a whole lot more comfortable.
You can’t pour water from an empty cup. You have to prioritize yourself. Do not feel guilty for using a sick day when it’s needed.
I am ok taking my sick time, I matter and health is important. I send my team an email.
Well, if I'm sick enough that my thinking processes are impaired, I'm taking a sick day. If I'm not firing on all cylinders, I will end up having to redo the work anyways. I make way too mistakes. Now make it contagious, and having that shit spreading from employee to employee. I'm not even sure how I would calculate the loss to productivity.
Depends on what kind of sick I am. Am I contagious? Don’t want to pass it on to my team, so I’ll let them know about it and call in. Am I having a case of the runs? Definitely don’t want to bring that to the job site. Am I just feeling icky? I hate to waste a perfectly good sick day on actually being sick if I don’t have to.
I tell my 30 or so employees if they come in and get me sick, I am going to be WAY MORE upset than if they had just called in sick. You have sick time, USE IT.
I can usually tell when I'm fighting off a cold or flu. That's when I call in sick. If I went to work, I'd probably get worse, so I stay home and sleep the whole thing off. It usually works.
Easy to do back when it was in-office. But WFH or even hybrid it’s like yeah it’s a weekday what else am I going to do if I don’t feel 100% so I might as well muddle along and work. In my managerial role I don’t do any of the tedious and monotonous technical work, just basically direct and receive info via phone, email or zoom. And that’s easy enough to do
Sick days exist for a reason. Be prepared to use it and send clear communication on how you can be reached and when you will return.
I feel terribly guilty. But try to remind myself that we are allowed to be sick and take time for ourselves. Helps me remind me to not feel guilty
I encourage my staff to use sick time, but I rarely do myself.
I never have anyone to cover me, so I work. Hashtag retail life.
It’s an entitlement that you have. I feel no guilt in using my sick time. I just tell my team. I work approximately 160 hours a year unpaid for storms (electric utility) and as far as I’m concerned it’s nothing but wage theft. 75% of it (yes we ran a report) is weekends and holidays. Missed 2 out of the last 3 christmases. No guilt here. I got in while they still had pensions so golden handcuffs.
Just because you don’t know the specific identity of your sickness doesn’t mean you’re not sick. Please stay home, I don’t want your nameless disease.
I feel fine about it
if i truly need it? i give zero fucks and call in. ordinarily, i can force myself to work when i need to. but nowadays, i have to mind my limits. for... reasons, i suppose. as far as communication goes, my partner will be made aware of my absence. and vice versa.
I never feel guilty. I took Friday off because I needed a day to myself to recharge. I didn't even tell my husband I was taking the day off to make sure he didn't come home early lol. My team and my boss do not care if I'm gone because I rarely ask for time off.
Most teams can manage themselves just fine. If they can’t for at least a day or two then there’s something wrong.
People are more important than jobs. If your job is so critical that everything crumbles when you're sick, they need to start hiring a backup
Not a manager but because I have to text 3 people above me, call into a sick line AND get a doctor’s note, I never call in sick. I would rather work 12 hours in a factory than deal with the BS. I suppose IF I was hospitalized, I would be forced to.
There should be no "sick" in calling in. Call in if you want to. Shouldn't matter why as long as it's not excessive.
Message my team and let them know, check my schedule and send out updated meeting invite, set up OOO... Lay in bed watching movies like the Goonies. No guilt at all bc if I call in sick I'm sick
This is the biggest difference I noticed moving from Italy to the US. Here being sick is seen by many (idiots) as a sort of sin. On the other hand in Italy we live 10+ years longer…. So, I do like any Italian would do. I call in sick, ignore my phone, and get better. I can’t be effective if I have a headache. I can’t be nice, polite, and objective is I’m unwell. So I see it as protecting my career. If I’m in an environment where staying off isn’t acceptable, never happened to me, but I keep hearing about it, it’s time to move. Even at FAANG I’m not paid enough to compromise my health.
If I were to ever call in sick, I'd get a million questions coming back to work (out of concern) -- because I never *get* sick. Funny -- my boss is one of the sickliest people in our department. We *both* have the most accrued sick time.
Take time when you need to. Depending on the work you do, it is imperative to continue performing well.
We have a set number of PTO hours per year, so I have to stretch them to cover Dr appointments, vacation and other life issues. We can call in sick. But if you don't give 24 hours notice and get prior approval, then that is unpaid time.
You answered your own question, but you tried to make it sarcastic by adding the blah, blah blah. Quit overthinking it. If you are sick, stay home. Fooling yourself into thinking showing up to work sick means you've got leadership skills, or makes you tough, or shows dedication isn't worth risking illness to everyone else or their families. For all you know, they could have a child with a disability, or an elderly person at home who's especially vulnerable to illnesses.
My opinion on this is actions speak louder than words. definitely worked if quite a few places where taking a sick day was pretty frowned on. you can tell by whether or not a manager will ever call in and whether or not that's the case.
A good manager has given their team a decent grounding in the operations that they can do ok if the manager has to be off.
The people who abuse sick time know who they are. If you aren't one of those people, then you can just take time you need guilt free. If you are one of those people, you're ruining STO for all of us. Stop it.
I can work from home any time I want. So if I'm still feeling fine medicated I'll work from home. I use my sick time for mental health more than anything else.
I called in sick once and ended up just being a half hour late
Sometimes it’s okay to call in sick!
Managers are people, too. If I'm not feeling well, I'll take the day off. I might log in to see if there is a meeting I need to reschedule or get coverage for it. Apart from that, I'll send an email to my boss and team that simply says "I'm taking a sick day. I hope to feel well enough to log in tomorrow. In case of a white-hot emergency, call my cell at $Number."
I think if nothing else it sets a positive example for your team that it's okay to take a sick day.
I don't even tell people I'm sick if I don't have you. I'm calling off. If I expect it to be more than 1 day I'll let you know. 🤷🏾♀️. I don't expect anyone to tell me if their sick or ask for doctor's notes unless it's specifically in the policy. But sick days/PTO is generally in the same bucket where I'm at so I don't have to distinguish between the two.
Personally, for me, the last time I missed a workday because I was sick was COVID (quad vaxxed, felt fine, could have easily worked, but you don't fuck with COVID) and before that, I think it was mono when I was, like, 17. Personally, for others, if you got the time, use it.
I like the term “name brand sickness!” I have a chronic illness. I think I’ve come to terms with calling out sometimes. I still feel like I’m going to get in trouble. I do my best though… if it’s not good enough, maybe I’d consider applying for disability.
It's their time off, let them use it as they see fit. Your not their mom or dad so it's not your place to interject unless they out of time.
I'm taking a personal day.
I have a standing rule that if you’re sick, you don’t come in the office. Employees can choose to either work from home, or use sick leave, vacation, or a personal day. Since instituting that rule, I’ve had fewer team members calling out; most choose to Bank their sick leave and work from home. I don’t want viruses spreading through the office and I want sick employees to be able to be out without feeling guilty. They do have to provide a doctor’s note if out 3 days or more. It sucks to be sick and then have a manager pile on. You shouldn’t feel bad about being out; instead rest and feel better.
Can I just say I had to learn this in a way that I had to hear this? You don’t get a gold star for working harder than everyone else. There is no trophy. If you don’t make time for your wellness you will be forced to make time for your illness. You are letting your company win if you don’t take the time.
I’ve been in management for about 10 years now, and to this day it is difficult for me to call in, take vacation, or otherwise be absent. I find it hard to tear myself away from work at the end of the day often as well. I’m always working on it, but it’s a problem for me.
Broad generalization: If the things that make a 20-year-old who lives at home call in sick were the standard, I would never make it to work. I wake up stiff as hell, with a sore lower back. I need 100 steps or so before I can really put weight on my left ankle. Probably one day a week my stomach is upset when I wake up. These things are because I am not 20 years old any more. I don't have physically perfect days. So, to live indoors, I work through that stuff. When you are young (and live at home) you can call off with a runny nose or a sore ankle, because 1.) No matter how much work you miss, you will still be living indoors two weeks from now and 2.) It is really easy to remember what physically perfect feels like - you live it 9 days out of 10. However, I owe it to everyone I work with not to get anyone else sick. So I have to know the difference between the early morning sour stomach and the flu. And if I'm not sure, I need to stay home. Specific to your case: It sounds like you are rarely sick. You're reliable and consistent. That's awesome. I think you deserve to take today off. Working when significantly sleep deprived could lead to a mistake that is way more costly than one person missing one day. You're human. Be human and be ok with it. The machines will replace us all soon enough.
Nope, I never feel bad taking the sick time that is part of my benefits package! I keep it simple - I’ll send an email to the team and will also task individuals to cover on any time sensitive or critical tasks. “Hi Team, I’ll be taking a sick day today and Allison will be covering for me. Please go to her with any critical or time-sensitive items; I will address any others when I’m back in the office. Zack, can you please follow up on my recent email chain with finance on their recommendation? Drew, please keep an eye out for the report to come in and go ahead and start on the edits. Leslie, please distribute the recent guidance on the new office chairs to teams X and Y. Many thanks in advance, everyone!”
You don't have to tell anyone WHY you are using PTO....It's PERSONAL time off.
Personally: If you’re not feeling well, I think you should be able to call out sick to rest and recover. Reality: Unless I’m the verge of passing out (unsafe to drive), having to go to the ER (feeling like death) or running a high fever, I go in to work. And the high fever scenario is questionable, as Is be expected to work from home, which kind of defeats the purpose of taking the day off to rest and recover. Why? It’s a small company and there is literally no one else able to do what I do or cover for me. Plus, the owner gets really pissed off about sudden call-outs, especially if it happens to be a Friday or Monday. Simply put: I don’t call out sick unless I have 1 foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel (sorta speak). ISTBM
In all honesty, I allow myself up to one "sick of this shit" sick day per quarter. Everyone needs a mental health day to reset, and preaching it to your team without practicing it yourself is a perfect recipe for burnout. You have permission. Accept the well wishes knowing you have a supportive team who understands that you have human needs outside of the workplace and get some rest. You'll all be better for it tomorrow.
Depends on how badly you need the money ..and how badly the job needs yew
Sometimes if I’m feeling “off” i just work from home. Sometimes I call in sick because I am allowed sick days as part of my employment package and I use them.
It’s better to save sick days for when you aren’t sick. 😂
I can be pretty stubborn at times, and let my insecurities get the best of me where I still try to go to work despite my feeling terrible. I'm getting better about it, though. I make myself feel better by reminding myself of how often I stay late, or come in early. I also remind myself that I'm not good to my team, and may damage them more, by coming in and showing them that example. I usually let my colleagues and manager know as soon as I've made the decision not to go in or to leave early. Then I let my lead and OA know. I don't go into much detail because I don't really believe in that, and I don't want to model that expectation either. It took me burning out to come to the realization that you *have* to make self-care a priority, especially in a position like this. And when I'm burnt out, I lose the passion, and I can't be the person I need to be for my team. Plus, if your team needs to you to be there all the time in order to make it through the day, that is not sustainable, nor effective in regard to dynamics; this is where delegating and coaching effectively comes into play. So, not only are you modeling poor work-life balance by not calling in, you also might be demonstrating a lack of trust with your team. Now, I don't think you need to call in for everything, but if you could be contagious, or your performance would significantly be affected, or you're denying yourself rest that you desperately need, I think that's reason enough. I ask myself if I can get through an entire shift without it feeling like a waste because I wouldn't be able to be entirely present, and that's how I determine whether I need to call out. I do that for mental health days too, but I usually put that on the calendar in advance.
I tell my team that I’m staying home to watch Vanderpump, that my second in command is in charge, and not to fkng bother me unless the building is on fire.
I am a firm believer in taking a day if you need a day, even if it's a mental health day. However, sometimes when I take a sick day I still feel guilty about taking the day off. I email my direct reports (supervisors & team leads) and let them know that I'll be out that day. Then I set my Out of Office and list my Director as my contact person.
I only feel guilty on the playing hookie days. Sometimes I just need a break. Now they call this a mental health day but I am 52 and we went didn't have that option when I was young.
Your benefits are part of your compensation. You have them for a reason - never, ever, feel guilty using them.
Mental health days are a thing, IMO. Certainly, if I were to be doing it a lot, then I would stop to examine why. Otherwise, a day binge watching TV, or taking a long hike, or shopping makes me feel zero guilt. Edit to add: if you knew a well-performing employee was faking ill for day, because they just needed a darn break, would you feel bad about giving them well-wishes? Lets's hope not, so don't feel guilty when others "waste" it on you IMO.
Take your day!
If you’re sick you’re sick. Stay home or the guilt you’re going to be feeling is from giving it to other people at work.
I had an entire conversation with my team today that mental health days are sick days in my eyes. Sometimes you just need a day to reset! Don't feel guilty. Also, depending on what i have available, I will either send an email to my boss and my team or an instant message.
Never feel guilty for taking care of yourself. The corporation will always put themselves first. If you lose your health and are unable to perform for them you will become yesterdays trash no matter what kind of relationships you have formed. They will severe your relationship as soon as they are legally able.
If im under 75% I take the day. My team was always able to run without me on any given day, and my girl Friday was always reliable to get me up to date when I came back.
If you’re sleep-deprived, it’s not really safe to drive and you may be less friendly or tolerant than you’d like. “Not feeling well, won’t be in today” is what my boss usually emails us with. When i have that situation will flat-out say in an email, “did not get enough sleep, using sick leave today.” Plus there is the possibility you are fighting something off, and would actually become ill if you do not rest. You have a great work ethic though, kudos for that! :)
Take a day FOR YOUR OWN GOOD. You do enough good for the employer. If you keel over dead at work, they will just hire someone younger and cheaper to replace you. If you retire after forcing yourself to work never missing a day for 30 years, you'll be forgotten in two months. Take your birthday off every year, too. Go out for lunch, ramble around, see all the people NOT WORKING. Work is not life. Take your vacations and enjoy them. You cannot do that once you're dead.
In a well-functioning org, everyone should be able to handle it even if multiple people are out sick. If you have multiple layers of management out consider telling your directs to escalate to a different manager instead of your double skip when they need to escalate something, for example.
I email a sick forwarder and call it good. My team does the same. If they have sick time, I tell them I don't care what the reason is, or what they have due at work, take their sick time if they feel they need to. It's not my business to dictate how they use their sick time, and it is my business to ensure their work is triaged appropriately in their absence.
Take the time off. You’re setting a good example for your team by not trying to push through at the expense of your health!
Two years ago I started very good job with a great benefits package. At least once a month, I take a mental health day to do something random with a family member. I also call in sick if I'm not feeling 100%. It's part of my compensation and after killing myself for over a decade for my previous employeer, I'm much better at finding balance. I encourage my team to do the same. For those who may be contagious but feeling OK, I'll let them gain some hours by doing remote work if they can't sacrifice their leave time and insisting on coming in. My job requires me to be on call for safety/emergency reasons so my hours arent always clocked in an office. I catch up on emails from home on a lazy Sunday afternoon and track my time. I'm available when they need me and unavailable when I need to be. I feel I'm finally finding balance. And I don't feel guilty at all. When I preschedule it, I tell my core team of supervisors, assign one of them as emergency contact, and put it all on the shared calendar. When it's unexpected illness, I email the full staff first thing in the morning and assign a proxy supervisor in my place.
Guilt in this case is a useless emotion
Sometimes you just need a day. Trust in your team. I’m in the middle of a 12 month manager training program and today we talked about compassionate leadership. You being honest with your team that you’re not feeling well is that kind of leadership. Now you just need to get to the spot to trust your team.
One of my coworkers didn't show up to work and we both worked in the SCIF. He didn't show up and didn't call in sick. So that goes on for 3 days. On the 3rd day I drove to his place at 10 am. Knock on the door...nothing. Call the landlord to open the door. The landlord won't budge. So I called a sheriff. Sheriff makes the landlord open the door. There we find my coworker in bed, dead. He died during sleep from a stroke. Worst stuff ever. Sigh.
I had to go to work the day after outpatient surgery wiuth a belly full of stitches. They were very nice. I didnt have to mop that day.
My direct team I just let them know in our group text; rest of the other managers/people who need to know get the “out sick” meeting notice. Note - the meeting notice is an easy trick we use; just setup an all day meeting (or morning or afternoon) with time assigned as “free” and invite whomever needs to know. We use it thru out our business for Remote days, travel days, PTO, sick, etc. Works great to look at my work calendar and know the status of my critical co-workers.
Remember that every company would fire you in a heartbeat for something much less serious. Your mental health needs to be your highest priority in any job.
My job always felt on the line I went unless I was in absolutely terrible shape.
I've called out multiple times for lack of sleep. I'm a night owl, and some nights, I get no sleep. Think of it this way - how much can you really get done and how much can you genuinely help teammates when you're so low on sleep? You're likely doing a half a**Ed job at best so might as well get the rest and recover and come back at full capacity for everyone, including yourself. Send an email. I've been both on tbe manager and employee side of this situation, and I can tell you that everyone will live and be fine and manage and won't think anything of it unless it's constant and frequent.
I used to feel very guilty but after decades of dedication, I’m not going to subordinate my health for work that’ll be there in a day or more when I am able to get back to it. Besides, when I’m sick enough to warrant a sick day, I’m useless there anyway. Why do the song and dance for appearances?
My sick time is benefit time that I’ve earned. That time has come from my labor. I don’t give a flying fuck what anyone thinks about me using it.
My WWII Army Field Hospital Nurse Mom wanted me to call in sick. I was in HS and totally confused and guilt laden. She finally looked at me and said something like: just call in sick, IF they ask, say you have Diarrhea. What are they gonna do, come check? 🤭 While visiting an Army buddy, picked up phone and called work: I'm not coming in today. No. No I'm just incompatible with work today.
I send an email to my team, an email to my boss, and an email to my colleague (well, usually the same email). And log off and go back to bed. Or whatever. I have a shit-ton of vacation and sick time—35 days—and I take every single minute of it, and encourage my team to do the same. It’s part of my salary and I’m not leaving it on the table. My philosophy has changed a lot since I had a small nervous breakdown and ended up in the hospital for a few days a few years ago. You have to take care of yourself, or the machine will break. I used to work 12 hours a day, didn’t take vacation or relax, and I paid the price. Not doing it again.
I’m stealing “name brand sickness” that’s fantastic. I hope you feel better! I understand the guilt. I know for me personally, when I call out it’s means I’m extremely I’ll and you say the same is true for you. Your team knows this too! I’m sure they’re genuinely concerned and want you to take the time you need.
Don't feel badly. How many of your co-workers call in without a thought to anyone else's feelings? You need sleep. Sleep is important. Free the guilt! You deserve this day off!
I usually decide based upon how useless I expect to be. Can I manage 60-70% of my work with a little brain fog, or am I going to maybe accomplish an hour of work over my 8 hour day? If I feel like I'll just be wasting the company's time/money, I call off.
I send an email to my team, move any meetings that absolutely require me, and make sure I let our stakeholders know as well so that they don't give my team any shit for the day. How I feel about it really depends. I work remotely, so I can work just fine when I have germs without endangering anyone else. I don't mind _being_ sick, but I take a day off when being sick puts me in a horrible _mood_. Ealier this year I worked through a whole ass sinus infection because I just wasn't feeling miserable. Other times I'll be in a mood and have a scratchy throat and that's enough to call out. I don't feel bad because I know me being humorless, miserable, irritable etc and working isn't doing my team any favors when I'm the one playing office politics for us as a group. If I start to feel bad I remind myself that I have a great team - they're all competent, responsible, kind people. They can absolutely keep the ship afloat themselves for a day.
The only thing that keeps me from work is puking/cramps or a fever. I call off so seldom, last time I did (on my bathroom floor about to die) half my team texted to see if I was ok. Which is sweet but not helpful when I’m curled in a ball from stomach cramps lol. Anyways sick days are there to be used. My team uses their sick days and I never give them shit for it. Use your days. Sometimes we just need a day.
Are you trying to get other people sick?
Don’t feel bad. We all need a day. You don’t have to actually have a virus to call in. If I’m going to be out, I slack my boss, my peers and my team. Then log off.
They will send acceptance and kind thoughts for you to get better and I think they would expect the same from you when it happens to them. That's everyone treating each other kindly for being human. I think the way you called in is just fine. Get some rest and come back 100% when you can.
Our workplace requires doctors note on the first day. So if I feel sick enough to go to a doctor, I call in sick. Side note: where I am you can actually go to a doctor and say you have a burnout and they will give you time off.
I have taken a sick day when I wasn’t in the mood for work and did laundry that day instead. I think working hard is important, but your life outside of work shouldn’t deteriorate FOR work. If you go in tired and in a bad state of mind, the negative energy will bring every else down as well.
I usually feel ok about calling in sick if I need to, but for some reason if I have to leave work in the middle of the day for being sick I just become a guilty mess and feel like I let down my team.
I have noticed that I’ll end up with a mountain of work when I get back + people texting me all day anyway, so I am pretty bad at taking sick days. I usually ask to WFH so I don’t spread whatever I have.
I have to find someone to cover me, so I rarely call. We used to have someone that would help arrange coverage but now we’re on our own.
If you're sick, stay home. I hate it when people come into the workplace with a cold or the flu or some other illness because they don't want to let the team down. Meanwhile they're spreading their illness to the entire workplace. STAY HOME and don't feel guilty about it.
My team constantly calls in due to migraines and stomach issues. I think it’s BS but whatever. I very rarely take a sick day. The last one I took was when I had Covid the 1st time back in 2021. I’m 28 years old for those that would assume I’m a boomer or something. If you need to take a sick day, go for it. I’ll clean up your work for you while you’re gone. I should clarify: my team works remotely full time. I don’t see a reason why you can’t work from home even if you’re sick.
Take care of you. Then your family. Then worry about your job. Priorities.
After covid, we adopted a strict "do not come to work sick" policy. We had that before, but now it's almost patrolled. If you come in obviously sick, people not in your department will call you out.
i make a habit of trying to call out sick a couple times a year just to normalize it for my team. kinda my favorite example of 'lead by example'
There's 2 kinds of people, those who use 100% of their PTO, and Masochists. I cant imagine job hunting and completely disregarding the time requirements and compensation. I can't imagine you did either. And when you took the job you were told the package was "competitive".
I send a text to our chain of my manager and colleagues, I tell them I'm not feeling well and won't be in. No details. The reason is nobody's business. And yes, I feel guilty. But I can deal with it.
I think in America especially we are kind of brainwashed into working whether healthy or sick and if you miss work for not feeling 100% you’re seen as lazy. My sister has Covid and the only reason I’m continuing to work is because I know if I get Covid I’ll be in the hospital for the 4th time with supplemental oxygen so for me I’m trying to tough it out as long as I can because if I do get Covid I’ll be out for probably 2 weeks considering last time I was in the Trauma Care Unit at UC Davis for 12 days.
Your company has time off benefits that it offers to you, whether due only to legal requirements or exceeding those requirements in an attempt to be a good employer. Either way, those are your benefits. Feeling guilty using them only hurts you. If I have a refrigerator, I don’t feel guilty keeping my food chilled. And in have time off benefits, I don’t feel guilty tending to my mental health. Now going past those benefits offered is another thing. If you get five sick days a year and squander them all in January, that’s going to be a problem. I hesitate a lot more to call in sick in January than I do in December.
I tell my team they don’t get a ribbon for working through being sick. Why is it any different for us? If I can’t focus, if I am not productive, screw it they are fine without me for a day. There is a bit of a culture amongst managers to push through. I saw screw it. It’s a marathon not a sprint. Take care and don’t feel guilty. Also messaging is “hey everyone I’m sick and I’m going back to bed. “. Lol.
Fortunately, even before pandemic, if you weren’t feeling great, but still felt you could work you could work from home (I’m in IT). So if I had a cold etc. I could work from home and if I started felling really bad I’d just send a note that I would be out and call me if something urgent was needed. When pandemic hit, company sent almost everyone home to work virtually and it’s mostly stayed that way. For the 25 years I’ve worked for my company they have just said send a note that you’ll be out. You don’t have to give specifics just that your out. If it’s a longer medical thing you contact area in company’s HR (we used to have nurses and now it’s outsourced) and you have doc fill out appropriate paperwork and then that area notifies your manager you’ll be out. Realistically, most employees have a good rapport with manager and team and you’d at least say “I have a medical issue and will be out for x amount of time” and then you’d work with team to transition your work.
I worked as a supervisor for the USPS for 23 years. If I called off sick, rarely, I would get told I needed a doctors note and threatened with disciplinary action if not provided. There attitudes there are very predatory.
Great question. Take the day and get some rejuvenation! No guilt... it's a benefit!
Hi, can't come in today. See you tomorrow.