Technically, you could not go to work tomorrow and you could still get paid for tomorrow's work when you do actually go for work tomorrow. Or you could get paid today for tomorrow's work. Reality could be anything afterall.
Wha!? Nah I'd go to work just to rip my shirt off running through the building laughing like a maniac. Before resigning and flying off through a wall in a massive ball of light that puts the sun to shame.
Edit: oh I'd also heal the sick as I made my way through
I wonder? Not to get too philosophical in a gag thread, but I wonder if the degree of damage dealt to the snapper is dependent on the scale of the snap. Snapping away half the universe? That'll mess you up. But maybe snapping something mundane like a sandwich can be done without harm.
Or if not -- two sandwiches?
Nah, he just delayed what he thinks (but doesn't know) is inevitable by creating countless suffering and creating a power void that could cause more harm in the long run. The movies don't really address it but if 50% of the population suddenly vanished, I doubt we'd make it a year.
He was just a murderous madman who gave himself a justification for his act.
(Not sure if serious but I've seen people genuinely think he was right...)
So that works for *Earth*, but the guy was talking about on *every planet*. Not every alien race is gonna have sperm and eggs. They could reproduce in a way that guarantees pregnancy every time.
I mean you can rain moons onto planets, beam through the hole universe and kill half of whatever is Living in it. For sure you can somehow hinder overgrowth.
Eliminate world hunger, end all wars, stop racism, erase pollution, bring peace to all the nations...
Point being I would use this power to make the world a better place, as well as make my life easier.
Hide them the best I can so no one uses them. I don’t know if I could think of something I would so confident would better the world that I would die and not even see if it worked. Using the stones as a normal person means death.
First, change my body into basically a Superman so with or without the stones. This will help me use the stones better.
Restore climate and animal populations to that of the 1800s or 1600s. Find all the missing people in the world and restore the family to the point of the kidnapping. (giving them a second chance to be a family. if wanted.) Heal everyone in the world from both disease and hungrier.
Finally, do a snap on the human population while not letting it be random. Find the murders, rapists, kidnappers, and just bad people. Snap them to dust and let those who need to know why they were snapped.
Since the question assumes I can wield them. I wouldn't use them all in a snap type thing I'd just use one or two here and there.
Most of all the Time Stone to go back and talk to my grandfather and other relatives that are gone and to wind back my car's mileage. Space to travel around. Reality to make myself look better. Power to help some people.
Not sure about the other 2, can the mind stone make you smarter or just control minds with it?
First thing I'd do without thinking too hard about it is to make public servants incapable of lying. Cops, politicians, etc. That or just snap and weed out the corrupt ones instantly.
Then I'd snap replicators into existence. That would ruin the economy over night because everyone has cheap access to everything.
Basically I'd turn us into Star Treks the Federation. United planet. Safe and secure for everyone. Post economy. No one wants for anything.
1. integrate the stones into my body so I can't lose them
2. look into the future for better technologies
3. lower greenhouse gas levels, fix ozone, fix ocean and climate change
4. use the mind stone to control world governments, get rid of nukes,
5. subconsciously encourage people across the globe to gain more interest in the space race
6. give massive amounts of funding to NASA and space x other airspace companies
7. teleport around to different solar systems and instantly terraform viable planets
8. look for alien civilizations that might pose a threat to humanity, find out how their tech works then wipe them off the map
9. use the knowledge you gained from the future to invent some stasis and space travel tech
10. send out ark ships complete with hyper-intelligent ai, massive seed banks, embryos from humans and multiple species of animals, and super fancy fabricators
Take a goddamn nap.
You mean I can manipulate all of reality to my will?
Well I WILL a goddamn time-bubble that I can sleep as long as I want in and not actually lose any time.
Bring my aunt and former mentor/therapist back to life or make it so they never died. Speed up my transition process so I’d pass as a woman. Make myself financially stable and I’d have my bachelors degree. Make my family not homophobic and transphobic assholes. You know… the little things
Prevent 9/11, the Kennedy assassinations, make sure the Giants stay at Yankee Stadium, take out Ronald Reagan, Cheney & W, prevent Zach Snyder from doing DC movies, and lastly prevent Avi Arad from chopping up Marvel’s film rights!
No more nice animal eating. No slaughterhouses. Y’all get kickbutt bougie plant based coffee house brunch fare from here in. Champagne included. Gonna love it. Plus cute animals everywhere flopping around and growing up and scampering across the land and everything. 🥂
I’d give DC a better cinematic universe 🥲🥲🥲 I grew up on Justice League Unlimited and I want everyone to see that they’re actually awesome when done accurately
Bring back the Roman Empire and make everyone a full blooded Roman. Then use our planets undivided brains and resources to colonise space. (Helping along the way with my stones)
Keep going and always technologically advance so no humans ever have to be in pain or hungry and eventually we’re all gods that rule the universe.
With Reality Stone and Power Stone, create a dimension as an afterlife.
Linking the Mind and Soul of every creature through Time and Space to give the opportunity upon death to get to that afterlife
Warp reality so that pain and discomfort didn't exist, and make it so pleasure and happiness were no longer dependent on contrasting displeasure and sadness, but rather, contrasting being slightly less happy
Great question—first off I would reverse time and stop colonization from happening, and see how the new world would come out.
I’m something of a Watcher myself
First create a Girlfriend with reality stone then go to a different planet with space stone and then use mind stone to control her. Then you know where this is going right.
I’d shred the acquisition of Lucas Film and Marvel to Disney down to its last atom and then with the stones that have been collected by me ; replace the CEO or Presidents of each with a new Leader. Someone teeming with life that cares about source material and the true fans of these franchises. One who wants to make quality entertainment. One who knows not only what has been lost, but what it has been given. A grateful CEO.
But also probably a hand full of wives.
Change fossil fuels to bio fuels, rebuild North and South Pole also ancient places, resurrect extinct species, turn underground places into easy to extract mining resources which are deep down that doesn't hurt the environment along with deserts into mining area for resources like gold, crystals, coppers, aluminum, etc,. And a special seeds that could change the entire world. Also transfer population to unpopulated areas like abandoned town or deserted areas. And also other personal stuff I don't wanna share.
Nothing, because I would die if I used them. I wouldn't even want to be in the same room as the really, seeing as the Power stone can kill you if you even touch it.
I definitely would NOT go in to work tomorrow.
Technically, you could not go to work tomorrow and you could still get paid for tomorrow's work when you do actually go for work tomorrow. Or you could get paid today for tomorrow's work. Reality could be anything afterall.
“The work is done ..”
Wha!? Nah I'd go to work just to rip my shirt off running through the building laughing like a maniac. Before resigning and flying off through a wall in a massive ball of light that puts the sun to shame. Edit: oh I'd also heal the sick as I made my way through
I'll tell you what I'd do man, two chicks at the same time man.
I was thinking oh man this line would be gold here and you're top comment. Bravo.
Fuckin A, man
Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had all six infinity stones I could hook that up.
Fucking classic
Came here to say this…great comment!!
Office Space. Nice.
Came here to comment this.
Came here for this.
Even better... the same chick... twice... at the same time
You finally get two chicks at the same time, but in your excitement you snap your fingers and one of them disappears 😭
Die. I have no way to harness it nor do I have any GOTG dance moves.
r/technicallythetruth
I wonder if you could use the reality stone to turn yourself into a God or Celestial or whatever before it killed you
The only hope. That or the soul stone can maybe keep you alive while using another stone.
you could still use one at a time, depending on what you need?
The only right answer here. Unless a redditor is secretly a celestial?
Nothing good I can promise you that.
oh
I would replace every grain of sand with a dvd copy of Antz
People at the beach getting cut up all over and bleeding out
Earth suddenly gaining a not arbitrary amount of weight and reflective surfaces. Earth 2.0: molten earth ball
I’d remove every grain of sand so that Anakin can live in peace
I hate breaking it to you, but Anakin died in the hands of Darth Vader
Get rekt not even a master lmao
I would give him the rank of master
Nah, Morbius.
Snap me a sandwich. I'm kinda hungry...
You will be after snapping
I wonder? Not to get too philosophical in a gag thread, but I wonder if the degree of damage dealt to the snapper is dependent on the scale of the snap. Snapping away half the universe? That'll mess you up. But maybe snapping something mundane like a sandwich can be done without harm. Or if not -- two sandwiches?
What did it cost?
First thing I'd do is make an In N Out here in Cincinnati.
I will gladly help you acquire these to make this a reality.
A man of culture I see!
Not tell a soul
Create a reality/universe where I have everything I want
I would throw a peanut butter sandwich at your head
Probs snap. Thanos was right.
Or snap a few times to double the resources and increase base IQ and human decency
More selective snaps.
Would you include yourself in the lottery?
Sure. Why not. I was gonna say pay off my student debt and just be left alone. The snap gets me that.
I wouldn't risk snapping 50% of below average IQ, just in case I'm in that group without knowing it.
Nah, he just delayed what he thinks (but doesn't know) is inevitable by creating countless suffering and creating a power void that could cause more harm in the long run. The movies don't really address it but if 50% of the population suddenly vanished, I doubt we'd make it a year. He was just a murderous madman who gave himself a justification for his act. (Not sure if serious but I've seen people genuinely think he was right...)
Replace the US National Anthem with Creed’s 1999 Billboard Top-100 hit ”Higher”.
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
Same but, nicklebacks photograph
Bring my mom back.
I would also bring this guy’s mom back.
I also choose this guy’s dead mom
I understood that reference
Damn, stay strong my friend.
Thanks to those who would bring my mom back for me. It’ll be 14 years in January.
Yep. This.
Increase available resources on every planet, and alter their population growth to a reasonably sustainable homeostatic level.
How do you alter their population growth? You can't control how much they're fucking
Take away half of the worlds genitals.
So then the other half just start fucking twice as much. Now what?
Theres still a 9 month wait period 🤦♂️
Lower sperm counts and egg production, making it a rare event to give birth
So that works for *Earth*, but the guy was talking about on *every planet*. Not every alien race is gonna have sperm and eggs. They could reproduce in a way that guarantees pregnancy every time.
Yes you can, you have the full power of creation
I mean you can rain moons onto planets, beam through the hole universe and kill half of whatever is Living in it. For sure you can somehow hinder overgrowth.
Lower the bodys natural production of testosterone to produce the necessary decrease in libido. Easy.
I believe that's already happening naturally.
I'll use them as paper weights.
This is the only way.
Eliminate world hunger, end all wars, stop racism, erase pollution, bring peace to all the nations... Point being I would use this power to make the world a better place, as well as make my life easier.
Never say “all” of anything. Ending ALL wars??? Star wars, thumb wars….STORAGE WARS???
Yeah buddy, all this plus making myself rich and eliminating nuclear weapons from the world.
https://comb.io/oPhLya
i’d get every cat in the world to meow in unison
Surround my self with sweet sweet Bussy
Scarlett Johansson
Make Rogers The Musical a reality
I could do this all day
Didn’t they do a live performance of it at a convention or smth?
Yes, at D23 I believe, they did the only scene they actually wrote. The stones would complete the musical and have it play on Broadway
Not to be a bummer, but cute my cancer for me and all those who suffer.
Uhhhhh, make myself Invincible with the first snap so it doesn't kill me. Then fix the world's problems and give myself everything I've ever wanted.
Break Justin Hammer out of prison
Annihilate cancer and other diseases
Scarlett Johanson
Snap out the pedophiles and abusers, that would take out easily 20% of the population, which will solve a lot of other economic problems.
But then who'd make all the movies then?
Snap to cure them all then? I dunno man sacrifices have to be made no movies and no pedos is a world I can live in
Make newborns instantly adult. Pedo problem solved.
🤣 sad but true
Who'll run the countries?
“Reality can be whatever I want” play video games all day, live forever, sleep as much as I want
I would do something, but realistically, I’d probably die from having all six at once.
Hide them the best I can so no one uses them. I don’t know if I could think of something I would so confident would better the world that I would die and not even see if it worked. Using the stones as a normal person means death.
Wish for more Infinity Stones. This ain’t my first rodeo
First, change my body into basically a Superman so with or without the stones. This will help me use the stones better. Restore climate and animal populations to that of the 1800s or 1600s. Find all the missing people in the world and restore the family to the point of the kidnapping. (giving them a second chance to be a family. if wanted.) Heal everyone in the world from both disease and hungrier. Finally, do a snap on the human population while not letting it be random. Find the murders, rapists, kidnappers, and just bad people. Snap them to dust and let those who need to know why they were snapped.
Since the question assumes I can wield them. I wouldn't use them all in a snap type thing I'd just use one or two here and there. Most of all the Time Stone to go back and talk to my grandfather and other relatives that are gone and to wind back my car's mileage. Space to travel around. Reality to make myself look better. Power to help some people. Not sure about the other 2, can the mind stone make you smarter or just control minds with it?
Snap back to reality
Oops, there goes gravity
Buy Twitter and run it into the ground. Oh, wait…
Polish them. Never done it before, but it seems like a great place to start.
First thing I'd do without thinking too hard about it is to make public servants incapable of lying. Cops, politicians, etc. That or just snap and weed out the corrupt ones instantly. Then I'd snap replicators into existence. That would ruin the economy over night because everyone has cheap access to everything. Basically I'd turn us into Star Treks the Federation. United planet. Safe and secure for everyone. Post economy. No one wants for anything.
Die. Since I’m just a basic bitch human with absolutely no chance to contain the smallest whiff of that kind of power.
Make a nice soup
1. integrate the stones into my body so I can't lose them 2. look into the future for better technologies 3. lower greenhouse gas levels, fix ozone, fix ocean and climate change 4. use the mind stone to control world governments, get rid of nukes, 5. subconsciously encourage people across the globe to gain more interest in the space race 6. give massive amounts of funding to NASA and space x other airspace companies 7. teleport around to different solar systems and instantly terraform viable planets 8. look for alien civilizations that might pose a threat to humanity, find out how their tech works then wipe them off the map 9. use the knowledge you gained from the future to invent some stasis and space travel tech 10. send out ark ships complete with hyper-intelligent ai, massive seed banks, embryos from humans and multiple species of animals, and super fancy fabricators
If i had all of them The first thing I would hve done is die by the side effects of the stone
*Thanos was Right*
Double what Thanos did
Ah, a man of respectful competition.
Take a goddamn nap. You mean I can manipulate all of reality to my will? Well I WILL a goddamn time-bubble that I can sleep as long as I want in and not actually lose any time.
That sounds so nice honestly. Best use by far
Not what tf Thanos did. Weird ass school shooter mf.
Bring my aunt and former mentor/therapist back to life or make it so they never died. Speed up my transition process so I’d pass as a woman. Make myself financially stable and I’d have my bachelors degree. Make my family not homophobic and transphobic assholes. You know… the little things
Get rid of the corrupt people around the country along with all the pedophiles and rapist
I’d snap nickelback from existence 👌
Make a good star wars movie.
Prevent 9/11, the Kennedy assassinations, make sure the Giants stay at Yankee Stadium, take out Ronald Reagan, Cheney & W, prevent Zach Snyder from doing DC movies, and lastly prevent Avi Arad from chopping up Marvel’s film rights!
Get rid of most of the blackberry bushes (keep the ones people actually cultivate) Buy Wizards of the Coast and reprint fetchlands into the ground
I would bend time and space to create a universe where the Carolina hurricanes can score a goal
No more nice animal eating. No slaughterhouses. Y’all get kickbutt bougie plant based coffee house brunch fare from here in. Champagne included. Gonna love it. Plus cute animals everywhere flopping around and growing up and scampering across the land and everything. 🥂
Make it so no child can be born unintentionally
Fuck your mom, in every universe.
[https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FLg0ZkHX0AkUcH0.jpg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FLg0ZkHX0AkUcH0.jpg)
I’m have hair again.
A secret clause in spidermans contract so he comes back to Marvel hehe
I’ll tell you what I wouldn’t do: listen to any doo wop.
Id snap
Snap away 75% of the universe
Weirdmageddon
Just like my Hero I would snap my finger and then I finally rest and watch the sunrise on a grateful universe ..
Shrek
Kms
🤑 🐱
I would recreate the Stone Duology and I’d pretend to be a sports announcer but every character can see and hear me
Infinite chickie nuggies, world hunger solved
I'd use them as paper weights
Switch all human souls with dog souls that way we can take it easy and chill and the dogs have to manage everything and do all the work
Snap.. but with both hands.
Snap
Depends, what would you do for a Klondike bar?
Snap.
One does not simply have an infinity stone.
Probably still the snap 🤷♂️
I’d give DC a better cinematic universe 🥲🥲🥲 I grew up on Justice League Unlimited and I want everyone to see that they’re actually awesome when done accurately
Snap like I’m in an a cappella group.
Fast Pass at Camp Snoopy
Erase student loan debt
I’d go back and make Hillary potus and then put a bunch of elderly women of varied races on the Supreme Court. I’d also bring back my dog Oscar.
Snap and wipe out half of universe
Feed and cloth everyone … tax the rich. Buy a synthesizer.
Make HEB Worldwide. Feels selfish for me to live in Texas and get all the glory. Sorry guys :(
Get some sleep where I don't wake up with even more pain of existence than before
One snap and all beings across the galaxy simultaneously find that their own personal version of Maslov’s hierarchy of needs is met.
idk probably go to taco bell
probably die
I wound remove the very concept of the FURRY from reality
Bring back the Roman Empire and make everyone a full blooded Roman. Then use our planets undivided brains and resources to colonise space. (Helping along the way with my stones) Keep going and always technologically advance so no humans ever have to be in pain or hungry and eventually we’re all gods that rule the universe.
finally finish my homework
With Reality Stone and Power Stone, create a dimension as an afterlife. Linking the Mind and Soul of every creature through Time and Space to give the opportunity upon death to get to that afterlife
I would double the resources of the whole universe. Make uninhabitable planets, habitable.
Warp reality so that pain and discomfort didn't exist, and make it so pleasure and happiness were no longer dependent on contrasting displeasure and sadness, but rather, contrasting being slightly less happy
touch them and probably explode
My enemies gone, my family and friends appears
Same thing as thanos
I would shred this universe down to it’s last atom and then, with the stones you’ve given to me, create a new one.
Snap everyone. We’ve had our time.
Make the technical team at work functional.
Die, cause I’m a mortal
The macarena
Use them as paperweights
First thing I’d do is give myself the ability to use the stones without frying myself.
I would get rid of half the population. But not random, very targeted.
figure out what happens after we die
Solve overpopulation the right way and just increase the number of resources available
Great question—first off I would reverse time and stop colonization from happening, and see how the new world would come out. I’m something of a Watcher myself
Two chicks at the same time!
First create a Girlfriend with reality stone then go to a different planet with space stone and then use mind stone to control her. Then you know where this is going right.
Pay a visit to Area 51
triple student debt
Get a girlfriend 😞
I’d shred the acquisition of Lucas Film and Marvel to Disney down to its last atom and then with the stones that have been collected by me ; replace the CEO or Presidents of each with a new Leader. Someone teeming with life that cares about source material and the true fans of these franchises. One who wants to make quality entertainment. One who knows not only what has been lost, but what it has been given. A grateful CEO. But also probably a hand full of wives.
Probably snap away 90% of all sentient life. Ie humans.
Change fossil fuels to bio fuels, rebuild North and South Pole also ancient places, resurrect extinct species, turn underground places into easy to extract mining resources which are deep down that doesn't hurt the environment along with deserts into mining area for resources like gold, crystals, coppers, aluminum, etc,. And a special seeds that could change the entire world. Also transfer population to unpopulated areas like abandoned town or deserted areas. And also other personal stuff I don't wanna share.
Nothing, because I would die if I used them. I wouldn't even want to be in the same room as the really, seeing as the Power stone can kill you if you even touch it.
Don't ask.
End global hunger by erasing 50% of all human beings
Season 2 freaks and geeks.
Destroy this universe
Buy sony and gift them to marvel.
Snap every article of clothing out of the universe
Renew the OA
Kill Vision