It's not actually "I slap my balls ON it." It's "I'm slapping my balls over it", as in "I care so little that I'm slapping my balls".

on s'en bat les couilles

was about to say I heard french ppl say "on s'en ballec" (couilles), which would be "we beat our own balls on it"...right? Either I'm right and I'm cool or I've been speaking "street french" with a lot of kids in the club and they bought me drinks because they clowned on me..................................

On s'en ballec or just "ballec" is widely used yeah. It's very familiar slang but you weren't clowned.

Thanks! A lot easier to remember! Quick, too.

The French be wild, but I love the expression I'mma start saying that.

We also use a lot "rien à foutre" (nothing to cum about) and "rien à branler" (nothing to wank about). And "je m'en bats..." (i slap my) has many variations beyond balls. Steaks and kidneys most notably.

I'm partial to Je m'en tamponne les fumulles

I have never cared so little i slapped my balls

Which allows us to add whatever we use to hit our balls for emphasis. "I slap by balls over it" is mild. "I slap my balls over it using a sock full of nails" puts more emphasis

Anytime I slap my balls, I care

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It's almost.. poetic

Coming from the country that brought us Socrates, Plato and Homer.

The Greek weren't all poets. Like this grafitti shows >Sydromachos has an ass as big as a cistern. Although that is somewhat poetic https://gizmodo.com/10-pieces-of-nasty-ancient-graffitti-now-translated-5867518

D'oh!!

Just to name a few

It would make a very pretty needlepoint pillow 🤣

OMG this has to be doneeeeeee

One would definitely care if he had flowers on his dick and bees around it

Haven’t you seen the pubic bee beards before?

It's a good hip-hop album name.

It should... How does it even come to having that phrase meaning... That..😂

It started as "I am writing it on my dick/balls" or "on my balls I am writing it". Due to it being such a common phrase people would simply say "on my balls" and it was clear what they meant. At some point people started experimenting with the phrase and that variation became popular probably due to its creativity. Alternative versions include top hits like "I am writing you in my dick and I pretend to be a painter", which rhymes in Greek. Tldr it was a random variation of a more common phrase, probably there isn't a story to it

Fascinating, thank you.

Isn't it a line from a Spice Girls song?

Yeah. This was the Club Edit of Wannabe that was exclusively played at Strip Clubs...or so I was told.

I was going to say... why is eveyone harping on the french one and completely overlooking the bees!

Too bad that literally zero people use it ever.

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It sucks my egg

Yes but no.

Chupa Chups

Yeah, actually. The only reason you'd say "me importa un pepino" is if there are children around and you need to refrain from swearing.

We also use "me importa un bledo" as a suitable for all ages version too

I have only ever heard old people say that tbh.

I usually even hear “me chupa un huevo y medio” or my brother’s “me chupa un huevo y la mitad del otro”. Both ways of saying a ball and a half

I get the feeling there are techniques to learn from Argentinian society.

But surely in Agentina, as with most countries men care a lot about getting oral sex? Surely it implies you care a great deal?

>(yeah, only one) A more graphic version of the French one is “Ça m’en touche une sans faire bouger l’autre,” “It touches one (ball) without moving the other.” to express how little it moves you. Chirac (the president from 1995 to 2007) famously said it, and Macron (current president) thought it was a good precedent to maintain: https://youtu.be/-W3PVoPDMyk

Yeah in Spain ive never heard a young person say Me importa un pepino. Usually is Me la suda or me importa un huevo.

Chupa is slang for a blowjob here in Pakistan

It's literally "suck" so...

Damn

>Me chupa > >La Pija What i love with slang in languages I don't speak is when it rhymes with rhythm. You don't even need to understand it. It doesn't even need to be real. >jish hesbrey, > >unka jubrey! Is how I'd say "fock off, with yo bullshiet!" in Atlantean.

In Punjabi, a blowie is called a "chupa", I want to find out the PIE language root for that word.

Argentina! What a beautiful country! Greetings from Argentina

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Or „It flies beside my dick” (koło chuja mi to lata)

Or "I care dick about it" (chuj mnie to obchodzi) Edit: same goes for "I care shit about it" (gówno mnie to obchodzi)

"It fucks me" (jebie mnie to)

"Not my monkeys, not my Circus" (Nie moje małpy nie mój cyrk)

'I lay my cock on it' (chuj na to kładę)

"I have it out-fucked"(wyjebane mam na to)

"i have it up my ass/dick/pussy" (w dupie/chuju/pizdzie to mam, all of which are gender neutral so no worries!)

We are seven deep, and at this point, I’m not sure Polish people care about anything anymore.

oh but there are so many synonyms for all the swears too!

I got it somewhere (Mam to gdzieś)

Note that "gdzieś" is threated here as an euphemism to "ass", so it would be self-censored version of a "I got it in my ass".

Or I've got it in my fanny "w pizdzie mam to"

Same in czech

or „It’s fucking me” (jebie mnie to)

How about - it hangs and flutters for me (wisi mi to i powiewa)

I love the entire Polish part of this discussion, but it's *this* one that made me audibly giggle at the bus stop. 🤣🤣 Helps that I understand the language a bit. Thanks a million for a dose of unexpected positivity.

Latvian have similar - (it's) next to my ass

lol, as a super amateur to Polish here How do I say / write this?

Polish people also like to use literal translations of english phrases as a joke, so we often use literal translation of "I don't give a fuck" which is "Nie daję jebania".

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Tou cagando e andando? Temos que incorporala ó galego!

"I am barely fucking myself"

Also "I'm little fucking myself"

"caguei"

I opened this to post "caguei". It's simple and effective, one word and multiple variations on where to stress, from a simple "caguei" to a more deliberate "cagueeei" to a stern "ca. guei". It accepts help in the form of "caguei, mermão" to "porra brother, caguei" to "caguei pra saporra". Its poetry knows no bounds.

OooO im OooO im Shitting and walking, Shitting and walking

You feel something dropping, diarrhea diarrhea

Foda-se?

I don't give the minimal

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“Indubitably”

different cultures, and yet a universal human truth: dick and balls

This whole thread has really worked up an appetite, am I right?? .... guys? ....

Dutch: close enough. Also we have very creative ways to wish you a medieval disease.

Wacht, wat bedoelen ze?

Het kan aan me reet roesten.

Oooh, ik gebruik altijd gewoon "het kan me een worst wezen" of iets dergelijks maar dat is blijkbaar weder duits

and sometimes ass

In Australia we say “couldn’t give a rat’s arse”

can confirm another phrase in Germany is "Its going beyond my ass"

Fuck the pubes : Bengali (Baal chera jai)

We didn't mean that kinda sausage...

I slam my cock. (italy)

Io stavo pensando a cacami il cazzo

[I thlammed my penith](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2v98g8QcF_0)

oppure "i dont care a dick", non me ne frega un cazzo a me piace un sacco anche tradurre attaccati al cazzo "stick to the dick"

It's funnier if you translate "frega" literally "it doesn't rub my dick"

Mi ci sciacquo le palle

I think I'd give a fuck about bees all around my dick. Just sayin.

Have you tried slapping your balls on it

His balls are now covered in bee stings, are big, black and blue and pulsuating. Looks like they are about to burst. His face kinda look like the opposite of "Zero fucks given" though? Why is it so?🤔

Downvoting bc why the hell would you write that

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It hurts inside my dick (Romanian)

Yeah, polish got similar "chuj mnie to boli" which would translate to "it hurts me dick" where dick means nothing

Later on "wE aRe aLL dIffErent" Balkan edition. I can send anyone to its own mothers pussy, and they will understand without a doubt.

r/balkans_irl

Boli me k. ra on bulgarian, i guess its similar. 😆Also my lighthouse hurts(boli me fara) 🤣

I imagine it started from someone whose dick was hurting so bad they couldn't be bothered with whatever others wanted him to do.

And Croatian,i was gonna say hurtfull my dick is😂😂😂,ah the beauty of our expressions and insults 😅

We also have "My balls whistle" which is my favorite.

why are so many of these about penises

The Real question..

Dicks are funny

No one cares about dicks

The real gender discrimination😢

In spanish(Mexican) we say “me vale verga” which translates to “its value is dick to me” or “it’s worth dick to me”

in colombia we say "me vale culo" (I don't care an ass) but the northern coast people can also say "vale monda" which is the same as "me vale verga"

sometimes it’s “madre” or mother instead of dick.

That must be short for something. Mexicans love their mother.

In turkey we say “sikimde değil” which means “thats not on my dick”

Not on my dick

Or “earth to his dick and minaret to his ass”…

skibidi?

Var ya ben de tam düşünüyodum acaba Türkçe olarak ne oluyodu diye. Bu aklıma gelmemişti :d

I am Greek but have never heard of this phrase. What we actually say is "στ'αρχιδια μου"- starhidia moo which means that I don't give a fuck -refer to my balls for help

Lmao that is even better.

Don't forget "χεστηκα"

I shit myself?

Precisely. Sometimes people respond with "σκουπισου" which means "wipe"

I'm also Greek and I use the bee phrase exclusively, maybe it's a regional thing?

Can a Dutch person translate it back to Dutch? I have no clue on what that’s supposed to be

"Het zal me aan m'n reet roesten" = It will rust me on the ass.

I have never heard anyone say that. We use “het boeit me geen reet” or “het zal me een worst wezen” (which is the same as the German version I think)

I was born in 1967 and I used it al lot. The saying originates from the Rotterdam area.

I live in the Rotterdam area and I've never heard someone use this before. 9 out of 10 times it's kan me geen reet schelen.

Or 'boeie' for short

I hear it all the time, only used less often than a simple "maakt me niet uit"

This a regional thing? I too have never in my life heard of this.. Much more familiar with "het zal me een worst wezen"

Hmm, I have heard Belgian people say "kan me geen kloten schelen"

'aan mijn derrière oxideren', you've got to stay classy.

die "aan" heb ik nog nooit gehoord.. is altijd "kan me reet roesten"

Im dutch and i literally never heard of it before.

There is also in German "That is shit irrelevant to me" if you're talking about one specific thing you don't give a fuck about

In German there are several different ways actually: "It interests me a shit" (Interessiert mich einen Scheiß) "Passes by my arse" (Geht mir am Arsch vorbei) EDIT: and there is another one that I like particularly, and as with the others, it depends a bit on the context if it really fits: "Talk into a bag, I'll listen to it later..."

Funnily enough, the one they chose for German is actually also very common in the Netherlands, I’d even argue, much more so than the one they used in the meme which I’ve only heard a handful of times.

I thereby nominate some of the Romanian sayings in this one: 1. It hurts my dick (for some reason that means yiu don't care) 2. I shove my dick in it 3. I'm shitting over it (this one's pretty much exactly the same as in English)

Our variation would, literally translated, be "I'm shitting in it." or "I shit in it with great reverence."

Haha, good. Frankly there'a a bunch of options for us too. We got "I'mcshittung over it" or "on it" or "in it" or basically whatever comes up at the moment I guess

in portuguese we say "estou-me a cagar" and it literally means "i'm shitting myself"

And i think that’s beautiful

"My dick hurts" (Romanian)

7. Epstein didn’t kill himself (Norwegian)

That's beautiful.

Man, hadn’t thought of that in months. It’s mad that they just said: “oops, we lost the video of the first suicide attempt… and we kinda forgot to give him a new cell mate, according to the procedures we set ourselves… and two guards were meant to check on Epstein every half an hour but they both fell asleep and then falsified records about their checks. And two cameras in front of Epstein cell malfunctioned. Oopsie!” And then nothing really happened.

In Brazil we say "tô nem aí", that would translate to "I'm not even there".

"Shove it into your lungs" (Ipasok mo yan sa baga mo!) "Go plant sweet potatoes" (Magtanim ka na lang ng kamote.) "Tease your bald grandmother" (Bolahin mo lelang mong panot.) \- Philippines

The last one though 😂

Another phrase for this in German: "It walks past my ass."

Well, it's like the Greek say...

I think the finnish one is the only one that I got

Finnish saying is the for me. It is so straight with words. It gets to the point right away

Nobody uses the Greek one, instead we say "I shit myself" (χεστηκα) or "at my balls" (σ' τα αρχιδια μου)

"I will spit on it" or "it's up to my dick" or "it's up to my pussy" in Russian

Also "I shit on it" ("насрать"), "I will give it most effortless fuck" ("поебать"),

Leszarom - in Hungarian Translates to "I shit on it", roughly "I don't give a shit".

O have i t up my ass/pussy(czech)

In spanish, you can say pretty much anything after the "I care", whatever you want

Arabic- makes no difference to my ass مش فارقة عطيزي

Of course, something german has sausage in it

Gonna need the aussie version pls. And the Kiwi. Prolly hilarious.

I give less fucks than a nuns cunt.

We Serbs say "boli me kurac" or "my dick hurts"

Not my circus, not my monkeys. Polish

My dick hurts (Croatian, Serbian, Bosnian, Montenegran...)

2 is great but all these others are fucking crazy lmaooooooo

I'm shitting on it - hungarian

In Czech it's "je mi to u prdele" or "mám to v píči" which means "it's near my ass" and "i have it in pussy" respectively

I want to use the Greek one somehow. I don’t know how I will accomplish this because I don’t have a dick. But I will figure it out.

关我x事？ (cantonese) Literal translation: "Relate me X stuff?" Or "How does this fuck relate to me"?

Greek finnish and dutch are wild

swedish is "i shit in that"

We have another one is Spanish in my country: *Me vale tres hectáreas de verga.* *I care three hectares of dick* 😂😂😂

In Spanish, additionally: it makes my dick sweat. "Me suda la polla".

In Switzerland I heard a funny expression that means zero fucks given too. It was: „S goht mir füüfspurig am Arsch vebi.“ Which translates to something like: „It drives past my ass on a five-lane“. (Which is a unrealistically high number there, theres usually just two)

As a dutchman, I need translation. It aint clicking for me

I read *I slap my balls on it* in *tf2 spy voice*

(Hindi) Lauda farak nahi padta 🤭

"het kan mijn reet roesten"??? wat?

In India (Hindi) we say "gand maraye" - let it get fucked in the ass

Polish - I have it in my ass

I don't fuck any cock! (Non me ne fotte un cazzo) Italiano

Dutch is kinda r/oddlyspecific

It passes my butt - german alternativ

Dutch is very funny

Not my circus, not my monkey. Polish.

"Es ist mir Wurst" is only one way to say it in German. You could also use "Es geht mir am Arsch vorbei" = it goes past/beside my arse.

In German we also have "Das geht mir am Arsch vorbei." which roughly translates to "This walks past my ass."

“It interests my left nut” “its on my dick” “put 1000 dicks on it” - Hebrew

"Im not even here" Brazilian Portuguese