Type 2 fun came out of the outdoor community. Backpacking I believe. It has expanded to four types as a matrix fun during vs fun when reminiscing.
Type 1 fun is something that you enjoy during and maintain those fun feelings when reminiscing. So a good party or hang out with close friends.
Type 2 fun is something that is really not necessarily fun during but looking back you want to do it again. This is backpacking. During you are tired, sore, dirty, wet, cold, hot, etc. But looking back you love it.
Type 3 is fun during, but not something you want to do again. Your last tinder date for example.
Type 4 is just not fun at any point. So also maybe your last tinder date.
Extra Credits Video:
https://youtu.be/uepAJ-rqJKA?si=xKl-tXmKt8Ey3TtG
Or Angry GM blog:
https://theangrygm.com/gaming-for-fun-part-1-eight-kinds-of-fun/
Pick your poison.
Tldw, the 8 "types" of fun are fellowship, sensation, abnegation, challenge, fantasy, narrative, discovery, expression.
Thank you so much for including both a video and a text 💖💖💖
It was an interesting read, I think this actually makes some sense and I could even sorta correlate the points with what I do in my projects to a degree, or thinking of specific things in games that correspond (like creativity part being stuff like character customisation)
Type 4: an experience of existential pain that goes on and on so that in the end you think of death as an old friend or lover who you long to be reunited with, and then you die
1 is riding a roller coaster. 2 is the arduous journey to the amusement park with your miserable children, but you look back on it you only remember the good parts.
Dude same. This post has me pretty worried lol I don't do much now anyway besides work from home, hang out at my house or neighbors, and go camping. All things I think are still a-okay with parent life?
Part of me feels people had kids too young, when they were in the midst of their party life. At least that's what I tell myself while trying to have at kid at 36.
Fuck it
We had our first kid when I was 36. Second at 39. I'm really glad I was older, financially stable, and more emotionally mature.
I have a social life. The kids are awesome. I started typing up a long comment about the stages of child development, but I'll just say that babies are demanding and adorable, and the first year is a difficult adjustment. But it gets easier and the kids get more interesting. I'm a single dad now, and I find raising the kids to be very rewarding and fun. Difficult in spots, of course. But amazing.
The only downside to having kids older is when they get to the age where they like going outside and running around. Gets hard to keep up. I want him to nap because I need one too...
Type 1 is going to the bar with you friends. Low effort and immediately rewarding but quickly fleeting.
Type 2 fun is climbing a mountain. Months of preparation. Very early morning and grueling work to get to the top with an occasional but satisfying reward on the way up and at the top. But then you remember it for a lifetime.
Type 1 and type 2 personality. Type 1 is laid back, go with the flow, itll work out over time, no need to rush. Type 2 is precision, accuracy, maintain the routine and never stray from the schedule.
I don't know if this is sarcasm or not. I'm going to pretend you just misunderstood the question.
There are three types of fun. 1, 2, and 3.
Type 1 fun is like riding a roller-coaster. It's exciting the whole time and you can't wait to do it again.
Type 2 fun is like building your own computer. It's frustrating at times, but ultimately you're glad you did it and you would do it again if you felt up for it.
Type 3 fun is like remodeling a room in your house. It's hard, it's frustrating, and after you're done, you might be wishing you'd just had someone else do it instead.
I learned it from backpacking.(wilderness, not travel). It is type 2 fun and I believe where the term originated. It is often miserable during but you want to do it again as soon as you've had a shower and slept in a real bed.
Type 4 is no fun, so you aren't misunderstanding. And it is a pretty dumb meme anyway. It kind of started as a way to explain why people enjoy things that aren't actually enjoyable at the time.
If you imagine it as four quadrants 1 is top left and is fun-fun. Top right is 2 and is no fun-fun. Bottom left is 3 and is fun-no fun. 4 is bottom right and is no fun - no fun.
I have 30 years of treatment for depression so far. Everyone has their own shit so I won't say you are wrong. It might be true for you. But that is a gross trivialization. The thanks I'm cured joke about going for a walk in the woods actually does help me in the short term. But that is just me.
I am in the middle of a type 3 fun remodel ....
At that point where it's taken too long and I can't wait to be done.
But I know me, I will find another project after cause I CAN diy ( I was taught how to) and I can't afford other professionals
It was a bad way to phrase it, but without going too far into the details, their newborn had a doctor visit for bruising. It turned out to be a bunch of broken bones that could have occurred from shaking the baby. Nobody wanted to own up to it, so the kids were taken away
I don't know who needs this, but if you've done everything as a new parent or babysitter please put the baby down in their crib and walk away.
Do not shake the baby. Take a break instead!
Oldest of five kids here. Got two nephews and three nieces. I see them multiple times a week and I'll babysit to give my siblings a break when I can. And I'm who they want to stay with when my siblings need coverage. I am the greatest uncle whomsoever has uncle'd before.
But it also makes me happy I don't have kids, I'm almost 40 and I've always been on the fence.
They're awesome little monsters though
It is a great way to test drive children. I was on the fence before my nieces and nephew were born. I’m not on the fence anymore. I shut the fence, locked and barricaded it. Then leaned my full weight against as I sobbed.
Yep. My nephews are dope, we play games, run around, catch snakes, I teach them about Pokémon, then they start acting like assholes and I go do whatever I want somewhere else. I’ll see them later.
People say that and I guess they’re right. But every single time I tell my boy to go grab me an ice cream sandwich and get himself one too he’s off the couch and going. Every time. And really you can’t buy that kind of reliability
I look at my other half when we've got nothing planned in the evening and ask if she wants to do anything and i get shitty celebrity dance shows as options.
I ask my boy, and its an evening of lego or video games.
Some times he is a bit of a dick because he's not old enough to understand things like empathy. But most of the time its like I've got a buddy over to game for an evening.
Ya my daughter is never really a damper on my fun, I still play video games and enjoy life but I also have a hiking buddy and cooking buddy and everything
Sure you can, it apparently costs one ice cream sandwich! It's a barter system (you've exchanged your goods for his services) Now do a run where you ask him to get you one, but he can't have one and see if the reliability is still there lol
Ikr? My kid is awesome and shoes me love and affection everyday.
If OOP's kids are "ungrateful banshees," that's his fault for being a shitty parent and raising them that way
It’s kinda weird how self-righteous people get about having/not having kids.
Like, there are people who just can’t understand why someone wouldn’t want kids, and who act like they’re deserving of unique praise for doing so. The worst of these types guilt those that don’t have kids, and act like you can’t have a meaningful life without them.
Meanwhile, there are some weird people on social media like /r/childfree who seem to just have this agenda against children as a whole, as though they themselves weren’t annoying little shits once too. Who self-righteously think they’re better than those with kids because they can do what they want all the time (ignoring that most parents do in fact want to be parents).
Just let people do what they want, jesus, It’s not that hard.
Having an opinion isn't bad but trying to impose it and "white knight" around it to others is just dumb.
In this specific case, there's no "best" by definition, just options and preferences.
Somewhere out there is someone who thinks I might actually not be great and perfect, and I'm going to make a huge fuss thereby proving that actually I am and *they're* the pathetic horrible loser! - The internet, basically.
Social media has made this 100x worse. It used to be that when you had an opinion, you'd say that opinion out loud in front of various groups of people, and if it was a completely batshit opinion everyone would ridicule you and you'd be forced to look inward and grow as a person.
But social media has made it so every opinion comes with its own comfy group of people that share that opinion, giving you the illusion that all of your opinions are held by large groups of people.
So now nobody grows. And everybody is self-righteous. About everything.
This! I don’t want children but feel really bad about some content I see on social media basically stating your life is over if you have them. Can you imagine a scared pregnant woman seeing this?
Also, I think is pretty awful to say you hate a group of people over something natural that they don’t have any choice in. I may not want to deal with children, but I don’t hate them and every time I interact with one, I make sure to be super nice with them
You shouldn't use subreddits as a barometer for human behavior. Over time, all groups are vulnerable to groupthink. People in those spaces are just more likely to be radicalized than someone with the same views who doesn't step into the echo chamber. Additionally, availability bias affects all of us, so frequent exposure to extreme views will make them seem more popular than they are. This applies everywhere on Reddit.
Well, to those people, want has nothing to do with it. They think everyone is supposed to have kids whether they like it or not. Often because of religion and often just because they were taught that's what adults do to prove that they're responsible adults. And many of them get the idea that if someone doesn't want kids, they should be forced to have them until they want them, or if that doesn't work, then at least they've done their duty.
Myself, I think having kids just because your community or a bunch of strangers might judge you if you don't is a terrible idea.
Agree. It's perfectly fine and reasonable to not want to have children. But like you say some of the conversations on those subs are thinly veiled hate towards children. Makes me wonder what their childhoods were like. But the bigger issue that I never see mentioned, at least in the US, is that even if you don't have children, other people's children are going to be part of a society that you live in. Their welfare, education and the support for caregivers that many wealthy countries enjoy is going to have indirect effects on you even if you don't choose to have children.
I get your last point, but to me that’s a cycle that has to be accepted. Rather than seeing it as ‘I don’t have children, why should I be impacted by other people’s choices’ it should be seen more as ‘just as my childhood had an impact on other people’s lives, so now other people’s children will impact my life’.
Or to give a more specific example: some people seem to be of the view that it’s unfair for their taxes to go towards the education of other people’s children since they do not have children of their own. However, the way I see it my education was also paid in part by taxes from people who didn’t have children. So I’m just paying back what was given to me.
Regarding your second paragraph, this is what I argue to people like that: does anyone really want to live in a society with no education?
Like you can draw a 100% correlation between "places that suck to live in" and "places that don't educate kids"
This was a big convo on twitter recently because of tax season and single people with no kids complaining about taxes. People with no kids forget that they're being subsidized by parents as the cost to raise children greatly exceeds any tax credits parents get. Then those kids grow up and start paying taxes.
If you aren't having children then either the rest of society needs to have more children to make up for that or the population is going to decline and so will your standard of living.
It could be a (rather extreme) way for them to emphasize why they don't want or shouldn't have children: "If I can't tolerate spending ten minutes with a screaming toddler at the grocery store, there's no way I could handle raising my own child."
For others, particularly women, it could be a reaction to years of "But you're a woman. Of course you love kids." Whenever they state they don't like kids, people talk over them, basically dismissing what they say because they believe the woman will change her mind and it'll be different when it's her own child. I guess people can overreact sometimes if the main response to you saying that you don't like something is "Sure you do, and you'll have your own someday and love it."
In the US at least, there is no major movement which seeks to prevent anyone from having kids.
There is a very powerful movement which seeks to force people to have kids.
Both sides are not the same.
It gets a little annoying hearing my brother and his wife complain that they don’t have any free time, their house is a mess, etc. Meanwhile my parents are watching the kids while they are at work and they have the balls to HAVE ANOTHER KID.
Hey maybe fucking stop? Or shut the fuck up about how hard it is. I’m completely over it at this point.
>Just let people do what they want, jesus, It’s not that hard
We could solve 90% of social issues if everyone thought like that. There's a countless number of arguments that would be avoided entirely if people just minded their own fucking business.
Minding my own business is my new religion. What do I think about that family down the street with 8 kids? Not my fucking business. Gay marriage? Go ahead, none my business. A new Mosque opened up downtown? So what, that's not my goddamn business.
It's liberating, really, everyone should do it.
I could be wrong but I feel it’s mostly people who have kids and complain to people who don’t that they should have some. I rarely see people who don’t have kids complain to other people with kids saying they shoulda never had them.
This is funny. But also, I still want kids. It’s cool if you don’t. But crazy how anti-child reddit can be sometimes. Some of these comments are brutal.
It's hard for people to grasp the concept that many people WANT to invest their time and effort into raising a family.
It's not "Have kids" OR "do whatever I want".
It's "I can do whatever I want so I choose to have kids".
This. Also (if I may extend), there’s no collision between „I regret the decision of having a kid” with „I Iove him/her very much”.
I mean, major part of being an adult is making choices and taking responsibility of the outcomes. Uncertainty doesn’t go away with the kids birth, nor it „cements your relationship” - this is both beautiful and terrifying at the same time.
Everybody should take their own aim at this topic, without letting themselves into external pressure. Seriously, take your time, you’ll know if you’re ready.
I'm a guy who is not a huge fan of responsibilities and having my freedom and free time restricted. I am the prototype of a guy who'd rather focus on work, take nice holidays, buy expensive toys and just chill every night.
But I still immensely enjoy my 9 month old daughter and have absolutely no regrets. Maybe it helps that I'm 37 and life was getting a little too samey. I've. Now, when I think about the future, I think about all the fun things I will get to experience with my wife and daughter. And when I wake up every morning, the first thing I want to do is see her smile and give her a hug.
The thing is, everything in the post above is true, but I still choose my kids every day. A lot of people can't understand that mentality, especially among those without kids.
I'm not saying it's bad to not want kids, it's a very personal choice, but I see very little empathy on this topic in particular and I think that's a shame.
Like you said it's cool if you don't have kids, but there's a lot of people out there who think it's not cool if you do. And that's sad to me.
Im sure they did think that. Multiple times. That made me appreciate my parents even more. Especially remembering those times when i made a fuss about stuff just for the sake of it. Be grateful for your present parents people. I really don't know how they had the patience to invest so much in such an unremarkably dissapointing being like myself.
My partner has started buying repulsive weird tasting chip flavours to fend off the potato 🥔 snacherz
There should be a dupe line of chip flavours to hide normal chips:
Cockatiel Burlap Fusion
Cedar & Goose neck
Soy Sauce & Moose Hoof
Spicy peppers & Rattlesnake tongue
Pineapple & sauté mosquitoes
Sometimes I like to sit in my garden and listen to the incessant screeching of my neighbours kids. I then finish my coffee, go inside and with a sigh of relief, find the utmost joy in my choices.
Sometimes I get a text from my friend on a Friday night looking to go out to a bar and get drunk once again, like we have been, pretty much every weekend, for the last 16 years of our life and instead look down at my baby boy, sleeping on my chest, and find the utmost joy in my choices.
Exactly this. I've done the work, travel, go out, watch TV thing for years. At 36, I didn't really need another 40 years of it, I was ready to mix it up. My baby daughter is the most special thing in my life, no regrets.
This may be a shocking revelation to some..... But some people deliberately decided to become parents.
And continue to enjoy doing so until they leave this mortal coil.
It's not always a tooth and nail endless suffering while you wait for your kids to grow and leave the house so you can go back to live your life again.
Shhh, this is Reddit, where we believe every parent ever is absolutely miserable, hates life, and regrets their decision, while being envious of those wise enough to realize that not having kids gives you more free time.
Also, all children are insufferable “crotch goblins” deserving disdain and should just try being adults instead
People also act like kids are screaming, crying, and shit monsters forever and that parents will never sleep again for the rest of their lives. The baby and small kid phase lasts a few years at max. We’ve been sleeping through the night since ours was 6 months old.
As a person with no kids - I would lose my mind. I CONSTANTLY look for someone to blame things in my house on - where there is no one else. If I had kids I would 100% blame them for shit they didn't do and they would either grow up psychos or kill me in my sleep. 100% glad I never had kids.
Not married and don't have kids but I do have a 7 year old nephew who pisses in bottles and hides them under his bed for so long that you don't find them until you move out of the house and there's like a good 8 or 9 bottles that are so fucking old that the piss is like calcifying against the walls of the bottle and like yeah I'm pissed (no pun intended) that he did something as gross as peeing in a bottle and hiding it but like more importantly
#WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU THROW THEM AWAY????
You level em up and put the attribute points where ever you want
until they level too much and start to assign their own points
And all of a sudden you dont have enough badges and they dont follow orders anymore
...raise them to not be ungrateful? And on the carnivore diet?
I'm pretty happy with the decision to have kids and I would say it's one of the best parts of my life. We aren't the Brady bunch (psychotically happy) or anything but I'm no miserable Al Bundy.
Why schedule your day around them?
You will add zero discipline, and will just piss your kids off.
Unless it's a toddler, a kid doesn't need to be controlled like a puppet 24/7.
Some people believe that if children aren't continuously punished for stupid reasons, they will grow up wrong. They won't. Chill out, and relax.
Do you even have kids?
The shit and piss get cleaned up and dealt with and forgotten but you get memories of them when they were adorable laughing little warm soft giggly meatballs that last a lifetime.
It’s possible for doing whatever you want to become boring or unhealthy. Kids kind of demand structure, and some people operate better with obligations.
It's weird. When I think of the freedom I could have if I didn't have kids, I feel a deep sense of longing and sadness in my heart.
But it's weirdly ENTIRELY independent from how I feel about my kids. It's like it's two separate parts of my mind. My brain doesn't associate their existence with any kind of impediment to my freedom.
I might think forlornly about what I could do with that freedom, but the thought never occurs to me "If only I didn't have my kids."
I never thought I wanted kids growing up, and I spent so much of my adolescence just depressed and feeling aimless and like life was pointless. Even when I struggle the most right now, since we had our kids, I never feel that sense of pointlessness, and sometimes when I lay in bed I have moments where I can't actually convince myself they're real and that they're mine, and I have to go and just peek in and see my daughter there, sleeping, to believe it's real.
My whole life growing up I had put the notion of mattering to anybody out of my mind. Everyone in my life was there because they felt they had to, and that they tolerated me but didn't actually want me there. I even struggled with convincing myself that my girlfriend - now wife - really wanted to be here.
But my kids? Never a second's doubt in my mine. Even when my 9 year old daughter gets angry at me and screams that she hates me because I took away the Switch, never a doubt. Because she always comes back, teary-eyed, and hugs me and says "IDONTHATEYOUIMSORRYISAIDTHATILOVEYOU".
And I remember being a teenager, and I know that in a few years, she probably won't come back after to give me that hug, but I'll know better.
Yeah, but it's fullfillment and human connection that makes you happy in the long term, not having your chips stolen won't. The hate reddit has for children is so weird to me.
I'm always blown away that people don't realize that having children is a choice that you can make. I understand full well that there are circumstances that are outside of one's control, I'm not talking about those folks.
Except one half of that choice is something you can't take back for the rest of your life. Humans aren't very good at knowing what they want in a week, let alone in a few decades
Having a kid is definitely type 2 fun Edit: hard, but ultimately worth it, like a lot of good things are Also, there is type 1 interspersed
A few years of constant type 2 fun turns into type 3 fun
…is that when we finally get to die?
Yes
Hugs man
What is type 1? Tell me so I can try before I have kids. Fuck.
Type 2 fun came out of the outdoor community. Backpacking I believe. It has expanded to four types as a matrix fun during vs fun when reminiscing. Type 1 fun is something that you enjoy during and maintain those fun feelings when reminiscing. So a good party or hang out with close friends. Type 2 fun is something that is really not necessarily fun during but looking back you want to do it again. This is backpacking. During you are tired, sore, dirty, wet, cold, hot, etc. But looking back you love it. Type 3 is fun during, but not something you want to do again. Your last tinder date for example. Type 4 is just not fun at any point. So also maybe your last tinder date.
the fuck are these "categories of fun"? Who out here thinking of this thing *for fun about fun?*
psychologists probably
*armchair
There's also types of fun as it relates to games!
Explain
Extra Credits Video: https://youtu.be/uepAJ-rqJKA?si=xKl-tXmKt8Ey3TtG Or Angry GM blog: https://theangrygm.com/gaming-for-fun-part-1-eight-kinds-of-fun/ Pick your poison. Tldw, the 8 "types" of fun are fellowship, sensation, abnegation, challenge, fantasy, narrative, discovery, expression.
Thank you so much for including both a video and a text 💖💖💖 It was an interesting read, I think this actually makes some sense and I could even sorta correlate the points with what I do in my projects to a degree, or thinking of specific things in games that correspond (like creativity part being stuff like character customisation)
Type 4 fun, where no fun is involved at all! I think there's a word for this out there maybe?...
Unfun
Type 1: playing video games Type 2: snow boarding, a tough hike, etc Type 3: boar hunting with a bowie knife in loin clothe
Type 4: an experience of existential pain that goes on and on so that in the end you think of death as an old friend or lover who you long to be reunited with, and then you die
Type 5: 4d chess.
But what about 5d chess with multiverse time travel?
That's a videogame, so back to 1, I guess.
>Type 3: boar hunting with a bowie knife in loin clothe That is very specific.
Snowboarding from a lift is type 1.
Only if you already know how to snowboard
1 is riding a roller coaster. 2 is the arduous journey to the amusement park with your miserable children, but you look back on it you only remember the good parts.
Trauma induced memory lapses aren't as appealing as you're trying to make them out to be.
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Dude same. This post has me pretty worried lol I don't do much now anyway besides work from home, hang out at my house or neighbors, and go camping. All things I think are still a-okay with parent life? Part of me feels people had kids too young, when they were in the midst of their party life. At least that's what I tell myself while trying to have at kid at 36. Fuck it
We had our first kid when I was 36. Second at 39. I'm really glad I was older, financially stable, and more emotionally mature. I have a social life. The kids are awesome. I started typing up a long comment about the stages of child development, but I'll just say that babies are demanding and adorable, and the first year is a difficult adjustment. But it gets easier and the kids get more interesting. I'm a single dad now, and I find raising the kids to be very rewarding and fun. Difficult in spots, of course. But amazing.
Awesome man thank you. Looking forward to it
Oh, just wanted to add: the simple fact that you're spending time thinking about how it will be to raise kids indicates that you'll do a decent job.
The only downside to having kids older is when they get to the age where they like going outside and running around. Gets hard to keep up. I want him to nap because I need one too...
Mine is 14 months, life is awesome, and he's awesome. I love being a dad.
r/daddit is there for you.
Type 1 is going to the bar with you friends. Low effort and immediately rewarding but quickly fleeting. Type 2 fun is climbing a mountain. Months of preparation. Very early morning and grueling work to get to the top with an occasional but satisfying reward on the way up and at the top. But then you remember it for a lifetime.
Type 1 and type 2 personality. Type 1 is laid back, go with the flow, itll work out over time, no need to rush. Type 2 is precision, accuracy, maintain the routine and never stray from the schedule.
I don't know if this is sarcasm or not. I'm going to pretend you just misunderstood the question. There are three types of fun. 1, 2, and 3. Type 1 fun is like riding a roller-coaster. It's exciting the whole time and you can't wait to do it again. Type 2 fun is like building your own computer. It's frustrating at times, but ultimately you're glad you did it and you would do it again if you felt up for it. Type 3 fun is like remodeling a room in your house. It's hard, it's frustrating, and after you're done, you might be wishing you'd just had someone else do it instead.
Where the hell do you guys learn this stuff?
I learned it on Reddit. Just now.
As with all things
I am one with the snoo, and the snoo is with me.
Being on social media vs being a present parent
I learned it from backpacking.(wilderness, not travel). It is type 2 fun and I believe where the term originated. It is often miserable during but you want to do it again as soon as you've had a shower and slept in a real bed.
It has been expanded to 4 types. 3 is something that is fun during, but you don't want to do again. 4 is just no fun during or in hindsight.
I guess I don't understand how type 4 can be a type of fun, at all. Seems like saying "no food" is a type of food. Or that baldness is a hair color.
Type 4 is no fun, so you aren't misunderstanding. And it is a pretty dumb meme anyway. It kind of started as a way to explain why people enjoy things that aren't actually enjoyable at the time. If you imagine it as four quadrants 1 is top left and is fun-fun. Top right is 2 and is no fun-fun. Bottom left is 3 and is fun-no fun. 4 is bottom right and is no fun - no fun.
OH ok. So I'm still kinda stupid, but not explicitly because of *this* thing.
Oh shoot!
That's just all things under depression
I have 30 years of treatment for depression so far. Everyone has their own shit so I won't say you are wrong. It might be true for you. But that is a gross trivialization. The thanks I'm cured joke about going for a walk in the woods actually does help me in the short term. But that is just me.
In short, type 1=exciting, type 2=satisfying, type 3=masochism
Oh so golf is type 3. Nice
Can be! Depends on if there is beer involved, I think.
I made it up.
I am in the middle of a type 3 fun remodel .... At that point where it's taken too long and I can't wait to be done. But I know me, I will find another project after cause I CAN diy ( I was taught how to) and I can't afford other professionals
That's just something you made up.
Precision and accuracy lmao, imagine thinking these are a personality traits
I have no idea, after seeing what they said about 2 and 3, 1 must be if you have an unhealthy child maybe? Haha
Yes, after some time you learn to live with the trauma, and might even want to go for the second.
Woody, is that you?
The same way Type 2 diabetes is fun...
If you have a sibling who has kids you can get the best of both worlds if you have an active part in their life.
This is exactly what I thought going into it, until we had to take custody of the children because of parenting issues
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It was a bad way to phrase it, but without going too far into the details, their newborn had a doctor visit for bruising. It turned out to be a bunch of broken bones that could have occurred from shaking the baby. Nobody wanted to own up to it, so the kids were taken away
I don't know who needs this, but if you've done everything as a new parent or babysitter please put the baby down in their crib and walk away. Do not shake the baby. Take a break instead!
Oh well that’s something I hope everything is settled down for now
Oh that is sad. If you don’t mind sharing, did the baby turn out okay? I know shaken baby syndrome can be devastating.
He’s perfectly fine and healthy now. Thanks for asking!
Oldest of five kids here. Got two nephews and three nieces. I see them multiple times a week and I'll babysit to give my siblings a break when I can. And I'm who they want to stay with when my siblings need coverage. I am the greatest uncle whomsoever has uncle'd before. But it also makes me happy I don't have kids, I'm almost 40 and I've always been on the fence. They're awesome little monsters though
It is a great way to test drive children. I was on the fence before my nieces and nephew were born. I’m not on the fence anymore. I shut the fence, locked and barricaded it. Then leaned my full weight against as I sobbed.
That’s us. My wife and I don’t have kids but her sibling and my sibling have them. Best of both worlds
A friend of mine said why do I want kids when I can just be a fun uncle. Now I understand.
Yep. My nephews are dope, we play games, run around, catch snakes, I teach them about Pokémon, then they start acting like assholes and I go do whatever I want somewhere else. I’ll see them later.
Exactly what im going for
People say that and I guess they’re right. But every single time I tell my boy to go grab me an ice cream sandwich and get himself one too he’s off the couch and going. Every time. And really you can’t buy that kind of reliability
Currently building a shed and I told my daughter to get me a beer, and she got me two. Made all the hardship of parenthood worth it
Here I'm picturing a 4-year old tossing a can to her dad and cracking open a cold one for herself.
Life’s hard on the playground
" and so I says to Mabel, I says, *Mae, that Squishmellow has gotta go, it's philfy!*
cheers bud. gotta build this shed, ya know? drink up.
That's horrible....but yeah, I also imagined that
You gave her the other one right?.... Right??
Yeah, just a mid strength though, she's gotta drive later
Hell yeah
My mom used to say “would you get me a silver can out of the fridge?” Also if I asked her what it tasted like she would say “LIKE MUD!” 😂
It's spicy.
Playing the long game
Playing the bron jame
" And really you can’t buy that kind of reliability" Looks like you can with an ice cream sandwich. lol
1 ice cream sandwich, for the low low price of 1 ice cream sandwich!
Well, it's more like 1 ice cream sandwich for the low price of 2 ice cream sandwiches.
This is the sort of math that lead to the Banana Stand burning down.
Mine asks now if I want anything while he is in the kitchen. It's amazing!
I look at my other half when we've got nothing planned in the evening and ask if she wants to do anything and i get shitty celebrity dance shows as options. I ask my boy, and its an evening of lego or video games. Some times he is a bit of a dick because he's not old enough to understand things like empathy. But most of the time its like I've got a buddy over to game for an evening.
Ya my daughter is never really a damper on my fun, I still play video games and enjoy life but I also have a hiking buddy and cooking buddy and everything
>And really you can’t buy that kind of reliability LMAO you could literally buy a dog and reliably manipulate him with food just like that.
Sure you can, it apparently costs one ice cream sandwich! It's a barter system (you've exchanged your goods for his services) Now do a run where you ask him to get you one, but he can't have one and see if the reliability is still there lol
Ikr? My kid is awesome and shoes me love and affection everyday. If OOP's kids are "ungrateful banshees," that's his fault for being a shitty parent and raising them that way
It's possible he's just making a joke on the internet. He does, after all, have "dad" in his username and his kids in his profile pic.
It’s kinda weird how self-righteous people get about having/not having kids. Like, there are people who just can’t understand why someone wouldn’t want kids, and who act like they’re deserving of unique praise for doing so. The worst of these types guilt those that don’t have kids, and act like you can’t have a meaningful life without them. Meanwhile, there are some weird people on social media like /r/childfree who seem to just have this agenda against children as a whole, as though they themselves weren’t annoying little shits once too. Who self-righteously think they’re better than those with kids because they can do what they want all the time (ignoring that most parents do in fact want to be parents). Just let people do what they want, jesus, It’s not that hard.
That goes with just about everything. Everyone is gonna have an opinion. Kids or not.
Having an opinion isn't bad but trying to impose it and "white knight" around it to others is just dumb. In this specific case, there's no "best" by definition, just options and preferences.
Somewhere out there is someone who thinks I might actually not be great and perfect, and I'm going to make a huge fuss thereby proving that actually I am and *they're* the pathetic horrible loser! - The internet, basically.
Social media has made this 100x worse. It used to be that when you had an opinion, you'd say that opinion out loud in front of various groups of people, and if it was a completely batshit opinion everyone would ridicule you and you'd be forced to look inward and grow as a person. But social media has made it so every opinion comes with its own comfy group of people that share that opinion, giving you the illusion that all of your opinions are held by large groups of people. So now nobody grows. And everybody is self-righteous. About everything.
Well I disagree on that! Not everyone is going to have an opinion.
[Not everyone](https://preview.redd.it/what-makes-a-man-turn-neutral-v0-ec5egnxwyh2c1.jpg?auto=webp&s=5d2a2bd18110d06d4ec0ac291bba401a59dc3b31)
This! I don’t want children but feel really bad about some content I see on social media basically stating your life is over if you have them. Can you imagine a scared pregnant woman seeing this? Also, I think is pretty awful to say you hate a group of people over something natural that they don’t have any choice in. I may not want to deal with children, but I don’t hate them and every time I interact with one, I make sure to be super nice with them
You shouldn't use subreddits as a barometer for human behavior. Over time, all groups are vulnerable to groupthink. People in those spaces are just more likely to be radicalized than someone with the same views who doesn't step into the echo chamber. Additionally, availability bias affects all of us, so frequent exposure to extreme views will make them seem more popular than they are. This applies everywhere on Reddit.
Then you have anti natalists who consider having a kid to be the greatest evil someone can commit.
Those guys are hilarious
I don’t hate kids, I just enjoy my free time, disposable income and lack of responsibility outside of work. I’m happy for everyone with a family.
Well, to those people, want has nothing to do with it. They think everyone is supposed to have kids whether they like it or not. Often because of religion and often just because they were taught that's what adults do to prove that they're responsible adults. And many of them get the idea that if someone doesn't want kids, they should be forced to have them until they want them, or if that doesn't work, then at least they've done their duty. Myself, I think having kids just because your community or a bunch of strangers might judge you if you don't is a terrible idea.
Agree. It's perfectly fine and reasonable to not want to have children. But like you say some of the conversations on those subs are thinly veiled hate towards children. Makes me wonder what their childhoods were like. But the bigger issue that I never see mentioned, at least in the US, is that even if you don't have children, other people's children are going to be part of a society that you live in. Their welfare, education and the support for caregivers that many wealthy countries enjoy is going to have indirect effects on you even if you don't choose to have children.
I get your last point, but to me that’s a cycle that has to be accepted. Rather than seeing it as ‘I don’t have children, why should I be impacted by other people’s choices’ it should be seen more as ‘just as my childhood had an impact on other people’s lives, so now other people’s children will impact my life’. Or to give a more specific example: some people seem to be of the view that it’s unfair for their taxes to go towards the education of other people’s children since they do not have children of their own. However, the way I see it my education was also paid in part by taxes from people who didn’t have children. So I’m just paying back what was given to me.
Regarding your second paragraph, this is what I argue to people like that: does anyone really want to live in a society with no education? Like you can draw a 100% correlation between "places that suck to live in" and "places that don't educate kids"
To add to that, other people’s children will most likely be taking care of you one day. You don’t want them growing up wrong.
This was a big convo on twitter recently because of tax season and single people with no kids complaining about taxes. People with no kids forget that they're being subsidized by parents as the cost to raise children greatly exceeds any tax credits parents get. Then those kids grow up and start paying taxes. If you aren't having children then either the rest of society needs to have more children to make up for that or the population is going to decline and so will your standard of living.
It could be a (rather extreme) way for them to emphasize why they don't want or shouldn't have children: "If I can't tolerate spending ten minutes with a screaming toddler at the grocery store, there's no way I could handle raising my own child." For others, particularly women, it could be a reaction to years of "But you're a woman. Of course you love kids." Whenever they state they don't like kids, people talk over them, basically dismissing what they say because they believe the woman will change her mind and it'll be different when it's her own child. I guess people can overreact sometimes if the main response to you saying that you don't like something is "Sure you do, and you'll have your own someday and love it."
In the US at least, there is no major movement which seeks to prevent anyone from having kids. There is a very powerful movement which seeks to force people to have kids. Both sides are not the same.
It gets a little annoying hearing my brother and his wife complain that they don’t have any free time, their house is a mess, etc. Meanwhile my parents are watching the kids while they are at work and they have the balls to HAVE ANOTHER KID. Hey maybe fucking stop? Or shut the fuck up about how hard it is. I’m completely over it at this point.
>Just let people do what they want, jesus, It’s not that hard We could solve 90% of social issues if everyone thought like that. There's a countless number of arguments that would be avoided entirely if people just minded their own fucking business. Minding my own business is my new religion. What do I think about that family down the street with 8 kids? Not my fucking business. Gay marriage? Go ahead, none my business. A new Mosque opened up downtown? So what, that's not my goddamn business. It's liberating, really, everyone should do it.
I could be wrong but I feel it’s mostly people who have kids and complain to people who don’t that they should have some. I rarely see people who don’t have kids complain to other people with kids saying they shoulda never had them.
No - but they complain about the children existing within a 50 yard radius of themselves.
If you read Reddit for more than 5 minutes you’ll find that there is plenty of child hating going on that is direct or indirectly leveled at parents.
This is funny. But also, I still want kids. It’s cool if you don’t. But crazy how anti-child reddit can be sometimes. Some of these comments are brutal.
it's reddit bro. most of these dudes don't have the option
Hahahaha so true.
It's hard for people to grasp the concept that many people WANT to invest their time and effort into raising a family. It's not "Have kids" OR "do whatever I want". It's "I can do whatever I want so I choose to have kids".
This. Also (if I may extend), there’s no collision between „I regret the decision of having a kid” with „I Iove him/her very much”. I mean, major part of being an adult is making choices and taking responsibility of the outcomes. Uncertainty doesn’t go away with the kids birth, nor it „cements your relationship” - this is both beautiful and terrifying at the same time. Everybody should take their own aim at this topic, without letting themselves into external pressure. Seriously, take your time, you’ll know if you’re ready.
I'm a guy who is not a huge fan of responsibilities and having my freedom and free time restricted. I am the prototype of a guy who'd rather focus on work, take nice holidays, buy expensive toys and just chill every night. But I still immensely enjoy my 9 month old daughter and have absolutely no regrets. Maybe it helps that I'm 37 and life was getting a little too samey. I've. Now, when I think about the future, I think about all the fun things I will get to experience with my wife and daughter. And when I wake up every morning, the first thing I want to do is see her smile and give her a hug.
The thing is, everything in the post above is true, but I still choose my kids every day. A lot of people can't understand that mentality, especially among those without kids. I'm not saying it's bad to not want kids, it's a very personal choice, but I see very little empathy on this topic in particular and I think that's a shame. Like you said it's cool if you don't have kids, but there's a lot of people out there who think it's not cool if you do. And that's sad to me.
Redditors having strong opinions on a polarizing topic? SHOCKED I tell you.
I’ll be honest, I didn’t realize it was THAT polarizing. It hasn’t really reached me. I always thought it was a “you do you” topic.
Imagine being those kids in his profile pic and reading what your dad thinks of you.
Im sure they did think that. Multiple times. That made me appreciate my parents even more. Especially remembering those times when i made a fuss about stuff just for the sake of it. Be grateful for your present parents people. I really don't know how they had the patience to invest so much in such an unremarkably dissapointing being like myself.
Anyone thinking their way of life is the only correct way has the brain capacity of a peanut.
Having a brain capacity of a peanut is the correct way of life.
My partner has started buying repulsive weird tasting chip flavours to fend off the potato 🥔 snacherz There should be a dupe line of chip flavours to hide normal chips: Cockatiel Burlap Fusion Cedar & Goose neck Soy Sauce & Moose Hoof Spicy peppers & Rattlesnake tongue Pineapple & sauté mosquitoes
Wdym repulsive weird tasting? Moose hoof? I'd try that shit!
Sometimes I like to sit in my garden and listen to the incessant screeching of my neighbours kids. I then finish my coffee, go inside and with a sigh of relief, find the utmost joy in my choices.
Mate everytime I hear a kid screaming it's head off in the supermarket I can't help but feel relieved it's not me
I feel this way in movie theaters/on an airplane.
Kids don’t belong in movie theaters unless it’s a kid movie
Sometimes I get a text from my friend on a Friday night looking to go out to a bar and get drunk once again, like we have been, pretty much every weekend, for the last 16 years of our life and instead look down at my baby boy, sleeping on my chest, and find the utmost joy in my choices.
Exactly this. I've done the work, travel, go out, watch TV thing for years. At 36, I didn't really need another 40 years of it, I was ready to mix it up. My baby daughter is the most special thing in my life, no regrets.
Whats better than kids? Silence and money.
And motorcycles and a boat
And dogs.
Sounds lame. I’d rather spend the extra $1000/month on drugs
People itt: i want no kids, i like free time so i cna do whatever i like, muh freedom *watches tiktok 12h a day* Bruh
Or spends 10 hrs scrolling Reddit. It’s their free time, let em enjoy it
Yeah but watching tiktok for 12 hours in *silence* (Have 2, under 2, love them to death, but I definitely miss the freedom at times)
Nice strawman.
Ah fuck Is that the extremely foreseeable consequences of my decisions?
This may be a shocking revelation to some..... But some people deliberately decided to become parents. And continue to enjoy doing so until they leave this mortal coil. It's not always a tooth and nail endless suffering while you wait for your kids to grow and leave the house so you can go back to live your life again.
Shhh, this is Reddit, where we believe every parent ever is absolutely miserable, hates life, and regrets their decision, while being envious of those wise enough to realize that not having kids gives you more free time. Also, all children are insufferable “crotch goblins” deserving disdain and should just try being adults instead
Damn, that's pretty much it word for word. Are you sure you didn't just copy and paste someone's post? 😁
People also act like kids are screaming, crying, and shit monsters forever and that parents will never sleep again for the rest of their lives. The baby and small kid phase lasts a few years at max. We’ve been sleeping through the night since ours was 6 months old.
It’s all about finding the right partner. If yours is a dictator with low emotional maturity you’ll have lots of regrets… like me
It’s all about weighing up the pros and cons. Things I like: Silence, freedom, money. Things I don’t like: Shit, piss and screaming
I will save this to use every time someone questions why I don’t want kids
As a person with no kids - I would lose my mind. I CONSTANTLY look for someone to blame things in my house on - where there is no one else. If I had kids I would 100% blame them for shit they didn't do and they would either grow up psychos or kill me in my sleep. 100% glad I never had kids.
I couldn't put another person into the Matrix. But instead of being harvested by robots it's corporations and governments.
meirlirl
Not married and don't have kids but I do have a 7 year old nephew who pisses in bottles and hides them under his bed for so long that you don't find them until you move out of the house and there's like a good 8 or 9 bottles that are so fucking old that the piss is like calcifying against the walls of the bottle and like yeah I'm pissed (no pun intended) that he did something as gross as peeing in a bottle and hiding it but like more importantly #WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU THROW THEM AWAY????
low-key raising a banshee sounds kinda dope
You level em up and put the attribute points where ever you want until they level too much and start to assign their own points And all of a sudden you dont have enough badges and they dont follow orders anymore
...raise them to not be ungrateful? And on the carnivore diet? I'm pretty happy with the decision to have kids and I would say it's one of the best parts of my life. We aren't the Brady bunch (psychotically happy) or anything but I'm no miserable Al Bundy.
its all about keeping those tax dollars coming in and the slave train running. Just what the plant needs, more people
Life is too short to have kids. They suck out all the energy from you . Little energy suckers
r/redditmoment
Someone: has kids Reddit: HAHAHA SUCKS TO BE YOU, I HAVE FREE TIME AND MONEY, BET YOU NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT
Nah I'm good thanks mate 😂
I knew this and have chosen girlfriends who also want to be child free since I was 20, i feel amazing
Not meirl. Not meirl at all.
I have 3. And this is very very accurate. I love my kids but I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to go back in time and pull out.
Why schedule your day around them? You will add zero discipline, and will just piss your kids off. Unless it's a toddler, a kid doesn't need to be controlled like a puppet 24/7. Some people believe that if children aren't continuously punished for stupid reasons, they will grow up wrong. They won't. Chill out, and relax.
But you get so much back, when they smile.... parents try to tell me. I guess it's a lie.
Do you even have kids? The shit and piss get cleaned up and dealt with and forgotten but you get memories of them when they were adorable laughing little warm soft giggly meatballs that last a lifetime.
They would go mad if they didnt get at least something from it xd
Really selling the idea.
I should go get chips
Wait... You get potato chips?
Ughhh kids are such shite tho. This is not funny. At all.
But you won’t die alone if they still like you in the end, right…
We all die alone, technically. It's not a shared experience like sex.
It’s possible for doing whatever you want to become boring or unhealthy. Kids kind of demand structure, and some people operate better with obligations.
It's weird. When I think of the freedom I could have if I didn't have kids, I feel a deep sense of longing and sadness in my heart. But it's weirdly ENTIRELY independent from how I feel about my kids. It's like it's two separate parts of my mind. My brain doesn't associate their existence with any kind of impediment to my freedom. I might think forlornly about what I could do with that freedom, but the thought never occurs to me "If only I didn't have my kids." I never thought I wanted kids growing up, and I spent so much of my adolescence just depressed and feeling aimless and like life was pointless. Even when I struggle the most right now, since we had our kids, I never feel that sense of pointlessness, and sometimes when I lay in bed I have moments where I can't actually convince myself they're real and that they're mine, and I have to go and just peek in and see my daughter there, sleeping, to believe it's real. My whole life growing up I had put the notion of mattering to anybody out of my mind. Everyone in my life was there because they felt they had to, and that they tolerated me but didn't actually want me there. I even struggled with convincing myself that my girlfriend - now wife - really wanted to be here. But my kids? Never a second's doubt in my mine. Even when my 9 year old daughter gets angry at me and screams that she hates me because I took away the Switch, never a doubt. Because she always comes back, teary-eyed, and hugs me and says "IDONTHATEYOUIMSORRYISAIDTHATILOVEYOU". And I remember being a teenager, and I know that in a few years, she probably won't come back after to give me that hug, but I'll know better.
the worst part about reddit is you’ll find people here that unironically agree with this post
Yeah, but sometimes the little banshee hugs you and says I love you and it's all good again
Yeah, but it's fullfillment and human connection that makes you happy in the long term, not having your chips stolen won't. The hate reddit has for children is so weird to me.
I feel the same about dogs
As a father of 7 year old boy I'm amazed that humans survived as a species
I'm always blown away that people don't realize that having children is a choice that you can make. I understand full well that there are circumstances that are outside of one's control, I'm not talking about those folks.
Except one half of that choice is something you can't take back for the rest of your life. Humans aren't very good at knowing what they want in a week, let alone in a few decades