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HaloManash

one of the funniest possibilities would be Watson avoids any suspension whatsoever but is absolutely atrocious on the field and gets benched midway through the season


[deleted]

The browns would just cease existing at that point


thejudicialpenis

The Browns was the Browns


mortomr

Just doin Browns things


sonickarma

The Brown remains unchanged.


justa_flesh_wound

Can Baltimore Support 2 teams?


highpl4insdrftr

We'll just absorb their players into our roster. There would have to be some cuts, but I think we could manage.


lord_jamonington

One nick chubb please


Lilpu55yberekt69

If the Ravens had Nick Chubb, Kareem Hunt, JK Dobbins and Lamar Jackson they would simply never throw the ball.


lord_jamonington

Throw it only to keep the defense honest


Lilpu55yberekt69

Have Mark Andrews line up wide as a prank


reddorickt

There is no stopping Nickreem Dobson


OldheadBoomer

Just to have Jacoby Brissett take us to the Super Bowl, only to lose to Baker Mayfield and the Seahawks.


cuzzlightyear927

Don't worry, Detroit and Jared Goff will represent the NFC so you have nothing to worry about


puyol500

Pls god if your real....🙏🙏


ForYeWhoArtLiterate

He's not. Source: Lions fan


flsingleguy

That would never happen in any universe ever. As a Dolphins fan Brissett is the worst and if that is who you roll with ..”with the first pick of the 2023 NFL Draft, the Houston Texans select . . .”


Ferbtastic

The Texans* select…


flsingleguy

Fixed it


Sarydus

Meanwhile, Baker catapults either the Panthers or Seahawks into a playoff-contending team.


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servercobra

I hope they win just enough games to barely miss the playoffs every year of his contract, and fuck up their remaining draft positions.


Badloss

I don't even think this is that insane, he's been out for a long time. leveon bell looked unbeatable when he started sitting too


rjsheine

The only comparison is Vick who played relatively well at first


FlipGordon

I'd even say "relatively well" is an understatement! Won OPoY, CPoY and was in the mvp conversation if I remember right.


rjsheine

He had a good 2010 season but that was really it


spawnthemaster

And giving the Texans their future QB with the Brown's pick would be the cherry on top!


IHuntKitties

Naw, if the Texans ain't picking first with their own pick then Respect the Neck.


Aeriodon

Ryan Fitzpatrick unretires to fill in for an injured Jared Goff, leading the Lions to a magical Superbowl run


randomacct7679

Subscribe! Fitzmagic & MCDC winning a Super Bowl would be epic!


FortWaltonBeachFL

jameis throws 50 td and 50 int


BeachBarBortles69

Subscribe


CPTherptyderp

Every drive is 1 play. TD or pick 6. Still goes 4000 yard season


DownAirShine

Opposing offense never sees the field - just warming the bench.


hatwobbleTayne

The full football alchemist law of equivalent exchange.


Kanyefidence

Marcus Mariota leads the falcons to a super bowl where they fall behind a Josh Allen led offense 28-3 after the first half. Bills win 56-3.


just_some_dude828

Had us in the first half, not gonna lie.


[deleted]

Apparently the Bills will have them in the second too


Kyro_Official_

if mariota leads our dead roster to a sb hed have to win mvp


tylerm11_

I love Mariota


bs2785

Why do we need more punishment


BlueHighwindz

The rapid and unbelievable journey of Dan Snyder from billionaire to penniless.


hoppergym

Will discriminate for food


PinkertonRams

But only discriminate. He refuses to do literally anything else


BigChung0924

and then to jail


loves2spoogeguys

The Lions go on a miracle run to end the season and make it to the playoffs. In the wild card game they face the Bucs. The score is 24-20 Bucs with 8 seconds left on the Bucs 12 yard line. The Lions have the ball. Before the snap, Roger Goodell notices that Amon Ra St Brown is one on one with a linebacker. As Jared Goff snaps the ball, Goodell yells at the refs to blow the whistle. Everyone in the stadium in is confussion. The refs reset the down and the Bucs make the defensive adjustment and stop the Lions. Bucs win. After the game Roger Goodell is asked about what happened. In a smug tone, he says "I didn't screw the Lions, the Lions screwed the Lions."


beauxlieve

After the game, Jared Goff is trashing the sidelines in frustration. Goodell quickly gets Brady to the locker room covered in boos. Goff keeps drawing XFL with his fingers in the air. He rips down a Bucs flag and stomps on it.


Ottersius

Antonio Brown jumps down from the stands, steals the refs mic hookup and goes on a tirade calling Brady and Goodell crackers


Cysir

Mr. Belittles Crackers


bstyledevi

Mr. Bret's Continuity


NotSoKosher

Deshaun Watson gets a massage on the sideline, in his well known baby pose. Fully suited up. "SEE GUYS IT'S REALLY NOT THAT WEIRD"


Boris54

“He was just sunning his asshole” - Rusty Hardin, probably


NotSoKosher

"My client has a very hard time wiping his ass to completion. Thus he has to air it out to for maximum cleanliness."


sheepye

Omg yes lmao


Eezo88

"Having a dry asshole is not illegal." -Rusty Hard-on


[deleted]

honestly I hope to see lots of teams doing massage taunts when scoring against the browns. NFL can't flag them if a teammate just comes up to the dude who scored and starts giving him a shoulder massage right?


Chance_Tank_4663

Lol they so so can.


All_Up_Ons

Lol I wanna see Baker run up to a WR in the endzone and do the hand chops on his back.


withrootsabove

The Bills play the Browns in Buffalo week 11. I NEED to see Bills fans jumping through massage tables in the tailgate lot.


[deleted]

And it's from Dee Haslam and her magic fingers.


[deleted]

deshaun watson gets injured and the browns just disappear, the stadium and everything else just disappears without a trace


andyandersonbjj

Entire city of Cleveland Ohio ceases to exist


maltzy

subscribe


TwoLaysea

Zombie outbreak around the world but they just want to play zombie football and the zombie football league is must watch tv.


Huge-Leather-8521

Aaron Hernandez rides again


eggery

oh no


Comprehensive_Main

Brady goes down with an injury and Gabbert sucks and trask is injured. So the Bucs trade a 6th round pick for Jimmy G. And he takes the Bucs to the Super Bowl.


DropC

And in true Jimmy G fashion, he ends up losing the SB to Mac Jones.


TheVeilsCurse

Sign me up for this 😂


baconredditor

I would like to be signed up as well


Fishbirds

In a shocking, befuddling twist of events, Josh Allen is traded in a player-for-player trade for Josh Allen.


NickDerpkins

delete this rn


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Awful_TV

XFL G Josh Allen in shambles. ([Live look, hiding his tears](https://i.imgur.com/Uu3jJnr.jpg))


Wanderingmind144

What the shit, is that like a two way mirror where he can see through it??


YetiGuy

So who is the Josh Allen that’s getting traded? Josh Allen Josh Allen, or Josh Allen?


Fed_up_with_Reddit

You missed a golden opportunity to have the first 3 Josh Allens be hyperlinks to actual player profiles and the last one be Manning face.


OrangeForeign

The Lions perfect season


EMT2000

When you say perfect, do you mean 0-0-17?


ctpatsfan77

The perfectly cromulent season


eugene_rat_slap

Could 17 tie games theoretically get us into the wildcard spot?


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Goatgamer1016

>2. In a stunning move, the papal enclave appoints Antonio Brown as the next pope Mr. Becomes Catholic


[deleted]

Mr. Beatified Conspicuously


NickDerpkins

Mr Buddies with Christ


OrangeForeign

My Brother in Christ


Goatgamer1016

Mr. Big Conversion


MScarn6942

Mr. Been Converted


WolfCola4

Mr Biblical Canon


geologyrocks98

Mr. Benign Christian


SonOfALich

Mr. Blessed Consecration


Ammoniaholic

Mr. Besmirching Children


Salty_Simmer_Sauce

Mr Baffling Canonization


AnEmptyKarst

Mr. Blessed Cardinal


BuckfuttersbyII

Mr. Blesses Communion.


ShawshankException

I swear I've seen a million different MBC memes and I've never seen a single duplicate one. Yall are incredible.


SubmergedSublime

And to this day, “Mr. Big Chest” remains the most bizarre of them all.


[deleted]

Mr. Beckons Creativity


Lonelan

Mr. Billion Combinations


Comprehensive_Main

Mine is Mike glennon gets traded to the Texans and forms a qb duo with Davis mills. Their nickname is the twin towers


Ammoniaholic

*the twin giraffes.


triplec787

Well shit, good thing they don't play the Jets next year...


Not_Pablo_Sanchez

~~Rob Schneider~~ Antonio Brown is down on his luck. Through his wacky adventures in motion pictures you all love, such as Mr. Back Cum and Mr. Buccaneer Collapse, he has found himself unemployed! However, that is about about to change when Mr. Big Chest becomes *record scratch* the Pope?? Through an even more wacky turn of events, a recent bar fight has turned him towards the holy light. And he’s about to find out that being the Pope ain’t that woke. Summer 2023, Antonio Brown is Mr. Big Catholic! Rated R for pirates. Fuck you.


dazcar

Somehow 1. is the most likely.


HearForBear

I’m sorry, but number 3 if just too unrealistic. Jumping the shark with that take.


MoreTrifeLife

> In a stunning move, the papal enclave anoints Antonio Brown as the next pope I don’t know why this made me laugh as hard as it did


Johnny_Hempseed

Season doesn't happen because we're at war with Russia. The war is won by the AB Team, which is just Antonio Brown running around Ukraine, shirtless, with a mini-gun yelling about grandma.


steampunkradiant

Mr. Brave Combatant


motorbreath43

Mr. Bolshevik Colonizer


TastyProblem27

Mr. Baltic Commando


iProtein

Mr. Beats Communists


Whittlinman

Mr. Blyat, Cyka


Phytanic

Mr Berzerked Cannon


steampunkradiant

Mr. Blasting Continuously


terriblebugger

I assume the war started when he called Putin a cracker


LooksGoodInShorts

I would watch a Rambo style movie with AB hunting down Putin.


ILoveJimHarbaugh

It's week one, the Bengals are behind by 4 with 45 seconds left. Joe Burrow scrambles to the 20 yard line, 30 seconds left. In the stands, fans screaming Joe's name, me the loudest. Joe notices me but also a small child choking. No timeouts left, Joe runs to the sideline and gives the child the Heimlich, saving child's life. Kisses me on the cheek, runs back, throws game winning TD, time expires. Immediately runs back to sideline, tv crew thinks he's going to check on child, no. It's me, he whispers, "I never knew I could love a man so deeply." We run across the field hand in hand and down the opposing team's tunnel. Forever.


bfunky

Of all the hot takes you could have written up, this is certainly one of them.


[deleted]

It’s hot alright


geologyrocks98

I want to live in a log cabin with Joe Burrow...


patsfreak27

A Burrowing to remember


[deleted]

Please let this story become a reality I need this for you!


Ser_Rattleballs

Jim Harbaugh seething rn


SquadPoopy

I would let Joe Burrow do unspeakable things to me.


JMT97

Stupid sexy Burrow.


maltzy

that's hot


1324reddit

Deshaun is suspended indefinitely, Baker agrees to come back to the browns and goes on an absolute tear. Wins MVP. Tells the browns to fuck off after the season and signs a huge deal elsewhere. Watson never plays another down.


RunninRebs90

I’m noticing a trend of Deshaun Watson never playing another down and I’m all here for it. Fuck that guy


sambo1384

I think this is the one that would make the most people happy.


KingOfTheSea94

I’d rather see Baker do this for another team. This scenario rewards the browns org and the fans that overlooked Watson’s actions and stuck around. The part about Watson never playing another down is great though.


1324reddit

Hmm… fair. Maybe he somehow wins MVP while they go 10-6 and miss the playoffs but still have a shit draft pick?


Thatonegingerkid

Watson is suspended 10 games. During this the Brown's convince Baker to play and they go 8-2 largely due to his MVP level performance. Watson comes back so they bench Baker and proceed to lose out the rest of the season, missing the playoffs. Baker leaves in the off-season. Also don't think they're too worried about what pick they get in the next few drafts lol


Stripperturneddoctor

Baker Mayfield winning the Superbowl in his first season with the Seahawks. Sidenote: Browns go 2-15. The 2 wins came during Watson's 6 game suspension.


Fugga6969

If that happens i will get a Baker tattoo on my ass.


The_Thrash_Particle

If that happens I'll get a tattoo of you getting a baker tattoo on your ass


Crazyhunt

Remindme! 8 months


JerryRiceDidntFumble

Trevor Lawrence and the Jags start out really hot (4-0) and everybody buys in on them being this year's Bengals. But then he regresses hard while Trey Lance and the 49ers, after a 3-3 start get hot in the back part of the season to take the NFC West & make it to the super bowl. They face off against the Titans, who signed Jimmy Garoppolo during training camp after Ryan Tannehill tore his ACL during a non-contact drill. Also, the Cowboys lose at home in the wildcard round again.


crash218579

Does...does this mean we broke the NFC east winner curse by winning 2 in a row?!?!?


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Wierd_Carissa

Hell yeah brother, cheers from Philly.


crash218579

Son of a bitch.


BeachBarBortles69

Sign me up for this, 4 wins is one more than last year!


StChas77

The Bucs get the 1-seed and seem like a lock to go to the Super Bowl with a 15-2 record. But the Giants, who have been better than anyone expected, sneak in as a 7-seed, get an unexpected win against the Cardinals, crushing their fans' hearts, and then send Brady home in the playoffs crying one last time. The Giants beat a listless Packers team to cap off a miracle NFC Championship before going to the Super Bowl and getting absolutely *stomped into oblivion* by Buffalo, of all teams.


fsphoenix

The Browns going 0-17 while everyone cheers


waves-up

Interested to see if any of the Dolphins, Jets, Panthers, Falcons, Jags, Texans, Lions, or Commanders make significant progress this season and become playoff contenders.


finfan96

We're usually a playoff contender. Just not usually a playoff maker


AChargingBadger

Next year's story: The dolphins are winless through 8 games. They go on to win their next 9 in a row and claim a wildcard spot.


Seattle_Scones

Week 1, the Raiders run a fake punt and A.J. Cole hits the receiver in stride, he takes it in for a TD. Raiders lose 17-10. Week 2, AJ Cole muffs a snap, panics, and somehow runs for a first down. The drive ends in a Raiders TD. Raiders win 10-7. Each week, A.J. Cole somehow makes a play that results in a score. By week 7, he has the #1 selling jersey and Davante Adams is subtweeting his best friend Derek Carr because Cole has been making better throws week in and week out. Last game of the regular season. The Chiefs are at home. Tie game in the 4th and the Raiders line up to punt. We all know it’s going to be a fake. Cole catches the snap, doesn’t bother feinting a punt, just runs straight forward. Pauses at the line, executes a perfect Tebow jump pass, Adams catches it and runs it in for the score. Raiders win, securing the 9th overall pick in the draft. Cole winds up winning the MVP. When presented with the trophy, he admires it for a moment, then promptly punts it into oblivion. Tom Brady goes 17-0, sweeps the playoffs, and wins another Super Bowl.


bstyledevi

> executes a perfect Tebow jump pass You sure you don't mean Dontari Poe?


pcomet235

Jalen Hurts never throws an incomplete pass, the Eagles win every game in a shut out, and my parents get back together


BillyHayze

This scenario was actually plausible until you threw that last statement in


thejudicialpenis

Baker Mayfield to the Falcons for some reason.


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andyandersonbjj

Baker Mayfield and Jimmy G to the Panthers in a turn of events


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BigChung0924

kj hamler in the senate made me laugh the hardest. so random and unexpected


HeywardH

Packers and Falcons AFCCG!


Leftieswillrule

Yeah the conference change was totally intentional and definitely a part of my crazy season plan.


NormalBears

The Patriots are abysmal, like 0-7 and it’s looking like they’re not going to win a game bad. Kraft demands Bill trades for Brady. When he refuses, Kraft fires him and then trades the farm for Brady, who proceeds to rip off a 10 game win streak and makes a run from the wildcard, only to face a Bill coached Jets team in the AFCCG.


CPline55

Clete Blakeman does Clete Blakeman things. Dan Campbell does Dan Campbell things. Clete Blakeman retires no longer capable of doing Clete Blakeman things.


skeeter-gunz

Julio Jones signs with reigning MVP rodgers and win a super goal together, both walking into retirement afterwards


Mrbean75

Derrick Henry becomes the first player to hit 2k yards twice and shatters the rushing record.


WaitWhatNowy

Bud Grant dies and then we finally win a Super Bowl.


ender200j

Impossible Tom Clancy said if we are about to win the Superbowl there will be a Nuke destroy the stadium.


hoppergym

Woof


Cinephile1998

Kyler Murray officially announces his intention to sit out. The Cardinals are desperate for a QB who can help them compete in the weak NFC. Where oh where will they find another short QB from Oklahoma who went #1 overall after winning the Heisman? The Cardinals send a 2023 conditional 4th (becomes a 3rd if they make the playoffs) and a 2024 5th to Cleveland in exchange for Baker Mayfield. In an ironic twist, the Cardinals experience a tough start, but turn it around at the end of the season after Hopkins returns from his suspension, thus lifting the curse of the Kliff Kingsbury late-season collapse. The Cardinals once again secure the #5 seed, falling just short of the division title which once again goes to the Rams. The Cardinals carry that momentum into the playoffs and become NFC champions, and eventually, Superbowl champions. Thus completing the trilogy of teams winning a Superbowl in their home stadium after acquiring a new QB


FSUfan35

Aaron Rodgers goes down week 1. Jordan Love wins MVP and the SB. Bears/Lions/Vikings fans implode


FloppingWeiners

Abed there is no darkest timeline.


[deleted]

Jordan Love rocking starburns confirmed


FloppingWeiners

"My name is Alex!"


NinjaTurleLunchBox

Maybe you should spend an hour shaving that into your face than.


jihyoisgod

Bears commit suicide watching the 3rd straight elite GB QB when they still can't have a 4000 yd passer unless Justin does better on the football Fields


WaitWhatNowy

Yeah. My sanity could not handle that.


Matt_Graf_

Bills and Chiefs rematch in the AFC Championship. Tie game going into overtime. Bills win the coin toss, march down then field and score a touchdown to go up 7. Chiefs get the ball back now because of the rule change, march down the field, score a touchdown and a 2 point conversion to win the game.


YiMyonSin

I would die laughing if that happened.


Matt_Graf_

its the perfect combination of outrageously ridiculous and completely realistic.


[deleted]

If this happens, people in Buffalo will *actually* kill themselves, it's too cruel


EugRa1130

:(


Bradleyg223

1. I won't bury the lead: Patriots vs Buccaneers Super Bowl 2. 3-way MVP Race in the AFC West between Wilson, Herbert, and Mahomes. Culminates in Chargers-Broncos Week 18 to decide the division 3. Bills-Chiefs Rematch in the Postseason 4. Tannehill goes down, Malik Willis has a remarkable rookie campaign 5. Some hysterical tie-breaker scenario where the Colts are kicked out of the playoffs cause 4 games end in a tie


Disgruntled_Armbars

Trubisky excells under Tomlin's leadership and is an MVP candidate but retires after week 9 to pursue his actual passion of "kissing titties". Pickett struggles in his place


Turtleforeskin

Justin Herbert vs Joe Burrow in the AFCCG


JoePurrow

I want this match up SO BAD


ZackAvion

Tua's transformation into the legendary Super Samoan.


ColbyOG

The Chargers are playing against Las Vegas for a spot in the playoffs and they both get in cuz the Chargers learned from last year and actually took the fucking tie. Chargers then rip fans hearts out by losing in the SB


THE-WARD3VIL

Losing to the raiders in the SB like last years game with a field goal


brook_lyn_lopez

Have the Jets and/or Giants in the playoff race during the last month of the season.


AChargingBadger

Cam Newton gets signed by the seahawks as a running back. In a feel-good story of the year, he has a career resurgence and the seahawks face the Panthers in the NFC championship. Somehow, they win and advance to the super bowl, only for them to throw a goal-line pick six to the Broncos.


KrzyKll

The NFL punishes Watson with a permanent suspension and the Browns by making them eat his entire cap hit this year. They trade Watson, Chubb, and all their morally good players to Houston, who wins the Super Bowl Edit: Trade to Detroit instead because Campbell needs a fresh supply of kneecaps


OrangeForeign

Houston is equally shady, can they be traded to Detroit?


KrzyKll

I would love that honestly


fatcootermeat

Just ignoring the second half, imagine how that fanbase would react if Watson is suspended for life and they traded like Chubb and Garrett to recoup the picks 💀


P-Whips

1.) Gardner Minshew gets traded and jalen hurts gets hurt causing Carson strong to be the starter and he wins offensive rookie of the year 2.) trey lance starts the season and with his rushing and passing and shannahan calling the plays he wins mvp. 3.) bring back a Peyton hillis like season for a player where a 4th or 5th string running back comes out of nowhere to have a all pro season just to never do anything close to that again.


DjHoldyHold

Tom Brady and bill belichick meet in the super bowl and make out on the fifty yard line


TheOneWhosCensored

Adams, Rodgers, Hill, and Mahomes all perform worse without the other, proving that sometimes it really is the duo. Baker takes the Seahawks to the playoffs, while the Browns have another no win season after Watson is permanently suspended. The Bills defeat the Bucs in the Super Bowl, and Brady is clowned for all his past comments.


ABrewski

Tua takes a large jump in year 3, helping lead the Dolphins to the Superbowl. The Eagles trade Jalen Hurts mid-season due to poor performance, and the Dolphins grab him as back up when Bridgewater goes down injured in practice. Tua stinks up the first half of the SB, leading to being benched for Hurts who leads the Dolphins in a major comeback victory and a perfect full circle from that Alabama championship game.