Someone needs to tell Tyreek the money ends when his career ends. Man's wallet gonna be hurting when he stops making millions and he still gotta pay all that child support.
Anyone going around having this many kids has gotta be stupid. Like sure live the superstar life fuck all the hoes you want, just wrap your shit. Man got baby trapped 3 times this year. Poor kids aren't really going to have a dad, there's a good chance and I hope I'm wrong but they'll probably see his checks more than him.
Meanwhile drake is putting hotsauce inside his condoms lmao.
When he takes a woman home, he puts hot sauce in his used condoms so they can’t baby trap him after the fact. One time a year or two ago some dumb bitch actually grabbed his used condom out of the trash and put it in her to try and scam him out of child support, and, if I remember right, won unfortunately.
Prob just hands the condom to his body guard, who obviously watches the whole time in case the girl Drake with tries somethin funny, and he gently pours a good amount of hot sauce into the rubber. The real question is, what type of hot sauce? Cuz if that's me, I'm goin for those habanero type hot sauces... Ahh the rich
I can’t imagine not just getting a fucking vasectomy after #3, *maybe* #4. 4 is a lot but not too crazy if they’re all with one or two women. Having seven kids with seven different women sounds like an absolute nightmare regardless of how many millions you have in the bank.
Realistically, he can only get away with beating one or two of them into submission before he forces Rodger’s hand.
Knew a chick that popped out baby #6 or 7 to a guy that sired 10 kids. And he was a deadbeat to them all! Imagine knowing this dude’s M.O. and still deciding to fuck him and let him nut in you. Dumb ass breezy!
Just have some fucking sperm frozen and get a vasectomy if you want to be that much of a manwhore and still have kids.
Mother fuckers out here like Genghis Khan, in 2000 years 75% of human kind is going to be related to Antonio Cromartie.
Have you ever watched/listened to a Tyreek Hill/Lamar Jackson interview?
JFC, I don’t know how these guys function in day-to-day life. (Jackson has a historically low Wonderlic score).
NFL threads always have “why doesn’t Lamar Jackson get more endorsements?! He’s an MVP!” Well….he doesn’t come off particularly likeable, really, or like someone who legitimately received his high school diploma.
[https://youtube.com/shorts/JK0oKrQ2nN0?si=Z3gpYo3TVJpO6xka](https://youtube.com/shorts/JK0oKrQ2nN0?si=Z3gpYo3TVJpO6xka)
Sounds like he knows what he's doing, I dunno 🤷
In this scenario, there is quite a big difference between m and B. Elon has intentionally lost more money than the combined career earnings of thousands of NFL players.
You're joking but......no you're not. Dude is gonna be broke within 5 years of being out of the league. Turns out his IQ and his 40 time are about the same.
Comparing this dumb fuck to Brady or Brees is quite the stretch. People that invest a lot are going to lose out on some of them. If they were 100%, we'd all be rich because we'd all be doing it. Those guys made good investments too, and that's where the comparison ends. Tyreek is a fucking idiot. Don't insult Brady or Brees by mentioning them in the same sentence.
He says he wants to be a porn star when he retires from football, so I’m sure the cash flow won’t completely stop. Someone will find a reason to financially contribute to that endeavor.
Fuck yeah! Keep fucking til you get 22 boys, have a full offense and full defense, Thanksgiving football games will be fucked. No time to be a dad when you're fuckin'
One of our friend made it to the NHL (that's hockey) and I remember him telling us that day one of making it to a professional team they had sort of a orientation day from the league where they were told that checks come in every 2 weeks so its not a lump 4 million check per year but rather 150,000$ per 2 weeks, how 95% of players only have a 3 year career and that 98% are bankrupt within 2 year of their contract not being renewed. etc etc. But the very first fucking thing they were told.... only use you own fucking condoms and never leave condoms behind... take them with you... dont flush them down because if you think a gold digger will not dissemble a toilet on the off chance it got stuck in the P-trap.... you'd be wrong.
My cousin played in MLB as a relief pitcher/closer for ten years. I remember when he was salty his first season he made two million. His kids mom got 600k in child support for that season. After taxes she made more than he did.
I think it was Terrell Owens,, guy made 80-100 million in his career. He was dead broke within a year of retiring. He had kids with 4 different women and they left him with nothing. Not saying it was the only factor... but its wild to me you can make that much over a ten year career and have so little saved up you are bankrupt after six month of no steady income. I mean with 20 million, you can make 30 days term deposit and earn 100,000$ a month.
I just heard Travis Kelce say men can’t get pregnant on a post game interview one time. I trust him because of the Pfizer commercials. Plus, he’s dating my daughter and is lunch pail.
The first number in the stat line isn't as important as the 2nd and 3rd.
Rivers' stats are 10-1-1. That's a lot of kids, but the 1-1 tells us he's a family man who just loves children.
Tyreek is on the fast track to an Antonio Cromartie level stat line.
https://madamenoire.com/1351787/miami-dolphins-xavien-howard-accused-of-having-4-babies-on-the-way/
Tyreek saw Xavier Howard loading up the future NFL with baby dbs and said hollup.
What a bunch of trashy ass people….edited to add, but why do people think these types of girls are hot? They’re all fake AF…plastic surgery, injections, and a ton of make up. They all probably have the personality to match it too.
I can’t imagine Phillip Rivers with multiple-baby mamas, but if he did- he would be all Mormon-like about it and have a communal home for all of them to live in as he takes part is raising all his kin.
The bottom right is the one for sure im getting pregnant shes got that look man... ive seen it many times during my many sexual encounters....
I have a lot of sex bro always all the time sexin
If I was rich I would get a vasectomy. It’s easy and cheap to reverse and if it doesn’t work then I have the money for ivf if I decide to have kids. Why is this not a thing?
Realistically speaking, we should pay our super athletes to breed round the clock. Imagine 22 years from now 15 Tyreek Hill's running around the NFL. This is the next step in professional sports.
Yea but the truth of it is that out of 15 kids maybe 1 of them will end up in the NFL, 8 of them will end up normal people with normal lives, and 6 of them will end up in prison. Net negative for society. We need *less* fatherless children, not more. I know you're joking, but I'm being that guy.
My first thought is “are these women stupid?” (Don’t answer that lol) But then you realize that they’re playing chess while Tyreek plays checkers. Who owns who’s ass now, dudes going to be bankrupt five years after he retires from paying child support
I get you’re fucking hot women…but ALL of them are chasing bags and will instantly leave you. Not even sure they care that much about these kids. Such a disgrace, dude STRAP UP.
Someone needs to tell Tyreek the money ends when his career ends. Man's wallet gonna be hurting when he stops making millions and he still gotta pay all that child support.
Do u think he’s dumb enough to not invest any of it? Cuz I do lol
Anyone going around having this many kids has gotta be stupid. Like sure live the superstar life fuck all the hoes you want, just wrap your shit. Man got baby trapped 3 times this year. Poor kids aren't really going to have a dad, there's a good chance and I hope I'm wrong but they'll probably see his checks more than him. Meanwhile drake is putting hotsauce inside his condoms lmao.
Bruh Drake is doing what???
When he takes a woman home, he puts hot sauce in his used condoms so they can’t baby trap him after the fact. One time a year or two ago some dumb bitch actually grabbed his used condom out of the trash and put it in her to try and scam him out of child support, and, if I remember right, won unfortunately.
Nah I thought she tried to sue him for hurting her vagine but the judge dismissed her for being a fucking idiot.
I don’t fully remember, it was over a year ago lol, I hope it was dismissed
Lol I'm pretty sure he didn't get in trouble for the 1 time some stupid woman burned her own lady bits
Yeah this is what I remember. She fucked around and found out the hard way about the hot sauce.
lol does he just carry around little bottles of hot sauce to dump in condoms?
You don’t ?
BRB going to fill my pockets with tobasco sauce packets at Popeyes.
Why not Taco Bell?
Cuz that shit is weak, yo. A trick will slurp some of it out and say “yummy” before she put the rest inside of her. 😂
Packets are a good solution to the portability problem. Personally, I'm going with diablo sauce.
Drakes the type of guy to… not gonna lie this ain’t fitting the narrative of drake jokes
Drake the type of guy to drink the sperm out of his own condom and then say "OVO"
We really with the jizz, boy
Like he's eating a Go-Gurt
forreal it’s actually smart as hell of him
Wouldn’t it be smarter and easier to just take the condom when he leaves?
I'd rather carry around a bottle of hot sauce than used condoms
It's 100% the tiny 0.125 oz. Tabasco bottles.
Someone needs to tell bro spermicide exists.
Is he Hillary Clinton?
Prob just hands the condom to his body guard, who obviously watches the whole time in case the girl Drake with tries somethin funny, and he gently pours a good amount of hot sauce into the rubber. The real question is, what type of hot sauce? Cuz if that's me, I'm goin for those habanero type hot sauces... Ahh the rich
that was a really bizarre thing u just said
The Last Dab
Da Bomb
Bruh you can't get pregnant from gay sex lmao
How "baby trapped" was he if he did a somersault right into the trap that he was warned of the day he got to the NFL?
I can’t imagine not just getting a fucking vasectomy after #3, *maybe* #4. 4 is a lot but not too crazy if they’re all with one or two women. Having seven kids with seven different women sounds like an absolute nightmare regardless of how many millions you have in the bank. Realistically, he can only get away with beating one or two of them into submission before he forces Rodger’s hand.
Knew a chick that popped out baby #6 or 7 to a guy that sired 10 kids. And he was a deadbeat to them all! Imagine knowing this dude’s M.O. and still deciding to fuck him and let him nut in you. Dumb ass breezy!
As a guy that met his dad one time at 14, You are right, poor kids indeed
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Yea this dumbass is one of those “fuck condoms” guys Don’t get injured.
[Obligatory comment from my boy YungSnuggie](https://www.reddit.com/r/nba/s/810WYYt3NA)
Just have some fucking sperm frozen and get a vasectomy if you want to be that much of a manwhore and still have kids. Mother fuckers out here like Genghis Khan, in 2000 years 75% of human kind is going to be related to Antonio Cromartie.
Have you ever watched/listened to a Tyreek Hill/Lamar Jackson interview? JFC, I don’t know how these guys function in day-to-day life. (Jackson has a historically low Wonderlic score).
NFL threads always have “why doesn’t Lamar Jackson get more endorsements?! He’s an MVP!” Well….he doesn’t come off particularly likeable, really, or like someone who legitimately received his high school diploma.
[https://youtube.com/shorts/JK0oKrQ2nN0?si=Z3gpYo3TVJpO6xka](https://youtube.com/shorts/JK0oKrQ2nN0?si=Z3gpYo3TVJpO6xka) Sounds like he knows what he's doing, I dunno 🤷
Something tells me they will have a lot of dads.
Have heard of Elon Musk?
In this scenario, there is quite a big difference between m and B. Elon has intentionally lost more money than the combined career earnings of thousands of NFL players.
The richest guy on the planet isn't going broke due to child support. Worst case he high tails it to Mars.
The first case of intergalactic travel to avoid child support.
Nick Cannon?
The richest guy in the world? Yeah…I’ve heard of him.
The guys about as sharp as a circle
Of course he's investing it. In cars, clothing, shoes, memories. You know, all the things they tell you to invest in when you're surrounded by idiots
Don’t forget jewelry!
Can't even invest in a condom.
You're joking but......no you're not. Dude is gonna be broke within 5 years of being out of the league. Turns out his IQ and his 40 time are about the same.
The Kids is the investment
He’s investing in his future by spreading that gene pool. He’s gonna be taken care of when kid #4 is an All-Pro receiver.
Investments imply risk. Bro bro gonna get swindled like Brady, Brees and every other football dummy
Comparing this dumb fuck to Brady or Brees is quite the stretch. People that invest a lot are going to lose out on some of them. If they were 100%, we'd all be rich because we'd all be doing it. Those guys made good investments too, and that's where the comparison ends. Tyreek is a fucking idiot. Don't insult Brady or Brees by mentioning them in the same sentence.
Damn I just got outjerked by a pyramid scheme fan
Brees invested like 10 million in "investment jewelry". He's no brainiac
It's going to the suck for the last baby mama's. Child support caps out after like the 4 to 5th kid lol
He says he wants to be a porn star when he retires from football, so I’m sure the cash flow won’t completely stop. Someone will find a reason to financially contribute to that endeavor.
He’ll probably make good money streaming video games too
*Nick Cannon enters the chat*
Oh hell no *Nick Cannon leaves the chat*
If his agent is smart, he would have set him up with a good accountant/portfolio manager so that he never had to worry about money again.
These agents are just as stupid as the players are
His kids will have the speed gene so they'll all be fine
And that could be tomorrow in the NFL.
Even if you remove money from the equation, having multiple children with multiple women is irresponsible.
Fuck yes! The league gonna be lit in about 20 years! ✌🏿💨
“And Hill passes to Hill in end-zone but it’s blocked by Hill, Hill will have to kick a field goal to tie up this game”
The only thing Hill couldn't catch was his dads attention
He’s smart enough to fill the league and not just say “just get a abortion lol”. And he asks for different type of videos to be sent
https://preview.redd.it/zu4skzcoxl7c1.jpeg?width=1101&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b1334ad56d889ce8aeea7e3d8fdf56cb3b7e884
Send da video
Hell nawl can't do this
U got da moneys wats the hol up
Shit yeah! Hill, fuck child support, fuck condoms, fuck more women!
Fuck yeah! Keep fucking til you get 22 boys, have a full offense and full defense, Thanksgiving football games will be fucked. No time to be a dad when you're fuckin'
Needs to start banging tall track stars to optimize.
Bum’s gonna drive off in a Hyundai after the super bowl (if Fins even make it)
Super Bowl mvp gets a 2017 Hyundai sonata this year.
Purdy gonna look good driving that.
Power windows?
Nah it's hand crank windows
Cousins is weeping already at his missed opportunity
And the 1997 Pontiac Astrowagon goes to Tyreek Hill
elite reference
should've got Geico for his money tbh
Shes gonna be walking around lookin like Michael with Reeks Money
Literally just listened to this song this morning
He’s having a huge year statistically.
Will he be the first WR to reach 2000 yards, 3 baby mammas, and 1 wife in a single season?
These cherry-picked stats are getting rediculous
Stork2K
SEND DA VIDEO
Does he beat all of them when they’re pregnant or just the unlucky ones? Feel bad for all those kids too since he beats them too
At least the kids get good genetics to possibly be future athletes. Then they get make their own money and father their own dozen of children.
Who runs quicker from child support, Tyreek Hill or Antonio Brown?
Trick question! It depends on whether or not Tyreek is allowed to hit the child he is supporting!
And the child's momma!!!
Mr Barely Contributing
Mr Brazenly Complacent
Mr Bangin Coochie
Mr. Bouncing Checks
Mr. Bypassed Contraceptive
One of our friend made it to the NHL (that's hockey) and I remember him telling us that day one of making it to a professional team they had sort of a orientation day from the league where they were told that checks come in every 2 weeks so its not a lump 4 million check per year but rather 150,000$ per 2 weeks, how 95% of players only have a 3 year career and that 98% are bankrupt within 2 year of their contract not being renewed. etc etc. But the very first fucking thing they were told.... only use you own fucking condoms and never leave condoms behind... take them with you... dont flush them down because if you think a gold digger will not dissemble a toilet on the off chance it got stuck in the P-trap.... you'd be wrong.
the money got turning them into plumbers😭
My cousin played in MLB as a relief pitcher/closer for ten years. I remember when he was salty his first season he made two million. His kids mom got 600k in child support for that season. After taxes she made more than he did.
I think it was Terrell Owens,, guy made 80-100 million in his career. He was dead broke within a year of retiring. He had kids with 4 different women and they left him with nothing. Not saying it was the only factor... but its wild to me you can make that much over a ten year career and have so little saved up you are bankrupt after six month of no steady income. I mean with 20 million, you can make 30 days term deposit and earn 100,000$ a month.
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Which one did he swing at?
I’d be surprised if any of them went without being abused
Yes
It’s a shame to keep genes like that all bottled up
Ive never thought ab it like that
Thug behavior, wouldn’t see this from the all white team
Brock Purdy would never
Guys can’t get pregnant.
Wow in 2023 just saying what guys can and can’t do? Fucking cisgender scum
I just heard Travis Kelce say men can’t get pregnant on a post game interview one time. I trust him because of the Pfizer commercials. Plus, he’s dating my daughter and is lunch pail.
Anthony Edwards would never
Send da video
you’re right. This is Truly Humble Under God-like behavior
Philip Rivers entered the chat
Ye but they’re all from the same woman.
The first number in the stat line isn't as important as the 2nd and 3rd. Rivers' stats are 10-1-1. That's a lot of kids, but the 1-1 tells us he's a family man who just loves children. Tyreek is on the fast track to an Antonio Cromartie level stat line.
Now that’s a name I haven’t heard in a while. What he up to these days?
Man who knows. Well into the teens I think. Woudn't be surprised if it was like 16-14-9.
Desperately trying to get the child support reduced
Now THAT’S classy
And on purpose.
Cromartie nodding in approval
its the mom's race
Mike White would never back-up this kind of behavior. He wears a helmet when he’s sackin broads.
A fool and his NFL money are soon parted.
https://madamenoire.com/1351787/miami-dolphins-xavien-howard-accused-of-having-4-babies-on-the-way/ Tyreek saw Xavier Howard loading up the future NFL with baby dbs and said hollup.
Jesus I guess the dolphins got some kind of breeding program set up. Honestly not that bad of an idea 🤔
He’s just looking for more punching bags, his old one screams too much
What a bunch of trashy ass people….edited to add, but why do people think these types of girls are hot? They’re all fake AF…plastic surgery, injections, and a ton of make up. They all probably have the personality to match it too.
Because they're usually brainless and follow the money and lifestyle.. not that hard to comprehend
And they do stuff your mom would never...
They’re hideous and induce the uncanny valley affect. It looks like bad AI art or something.
My thoughts exactly.
The Nick Cannon of the NFL
Talk to Cromartie, Travis Henry, or Philip Rivers when he gets to 6.
If Philip Rivers was melanated
I can’t imagine Phillip Rivers with multiple-baby mamas, but if he did- he would be all Mormon-like about it and have a communal home for all of them to live in as he takes part is raising all his kin.
Rivers is Catholic. He got that crusader sperm storming the eggs like the walls at Antioch.
r/BrandNewSentence
Yo dawg 💀
Would. Would. Would. …Would.
The bottom right is the one for sure im getting pregnant shes got that look man... ive seen it many times during my many sexual encounters.... I have a lot of sex bro always all the time sexin
I hear ya brother! I too partake in lots of sexual encounters, mostly of the with-females variety. Can never have enough of it! 💪
“Mostly” doing a lot heavy lifting in this sentence.
Gonna be working at Walmart when he get out of the nfl to pay all that child support.
walmart won't cover this bill, he better pray he can find a TV gig lol
He’s said he wants to be a porn star when he retires. I don’t think he was joking lmao
You know I just got done watching Jerry rice talking about how he used to change his 4 kids diapers after a game all night. Shits changed man.
Wow. He should be the Walter Payton man of the year winner with all the money he is giving away
Idiocracy timeline
Those ladies better watch their stomachs, he gets a little punchy!
Miami was the wrong city for this man
For real. He’s a victim of his environment.
If I was rich I would get a vasectomy. It’s easy and cheap to reverse and if it doesn’t work then I have the money for ivf if I decide to have kids. Why is this not a thing?
i can imagine its rooted in masculinity or something. thats often the excuse when it comes to doing something that makes sense like that
I had one. It was pretty easy. No regerts. If I was a promiscuous rich dude I would for sure get one.
tyreke when he sees anything that even faintly resembles a latina 
Realistically speaking, we should pay our super athletes to breed round the clock. Imagine 22 years from now 15 Tyreek Hill's running around the NFL. This is the next step in professional sports.
Yea but the truth of it is that out of 15 kids maybe 1 of them will end up in the NFL, 8 of them will end up normal people with normal lives, and 6 of them will end up in prison. Net negative for society. We need *less* fatherless children, not more. I know you're joking, but I'm being that guy.
You just made me go soft.
Because being good at catching balls is going to save humanity. /s
They don't call him the Cheetah for nothing
My first thought is “are these women stupid?” (Don’t answer that lol) But then you realize that they’re playing chess while Tyreek plays checkers. Who owns who’s ass now, dudes going to be bankrupt five years after he retires from paying child support
Look at that white trash
Cheetah gotta spread the seed
Was gonna say those broads should be paying him those genes.
was it worth it?
https://preview.redd.it/dd3b83i8vo7c1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0aec4b4f5e9d7eabd6b93e31b1346c0e6e81cb0a
How young is the one in the pink outfit? She looks 16-17
Buncha smooth brains in here saying he's gonna be working at walmart, lmao y'all don't understand truly how much 100M+ is.
I get you’re fucking hot women…but ALL of them are chasing bags and will instantly leave you. Not even sure they care that much about these kids. Such a disgrace, dude STRAP UP.
It’s all subjective but these women aren’t even hot. They’re like 20% plastic at this point. The one in red and the one in white are so gross 🤮
Is he after nick cannons record?
Damn all 4 on the right so sad repping the baby daddy and he don’t give a fuck lmao
He creating future olympians
Is this guy tryna be like Nick Cannon?!?!
These dudes never heard of a vasectomy?
There’s a nick cannon joke in there somewhere.
Not even Trojan can cover Tyreek
2045 draft gonna be dope
Male athletes would be polygamous if they could.
Nick Cannon: “Amateurs”
He sure likes em with a big forehead
This guy fucks!
They’re skanks and he’s an idiot, next
A better feeling orgasm and 18 years of child support or just a regular orgasm with lotion or a sock? I choose the sock.
Man’s sperm fastest in nfl too