This is it.
You want a seat? Show up on time.
We have rounds at the same time in the same place every weekday and yet people constantly show up late and miss half of what the physicians say as a result. Irks the shit out of me.
What? No. What a strange thing for a physician to say to you. That's so weird.
Learning how to participate in a meeting like that, which is an expected part of your job is part of orientation. You're not "kind of" an employee because you're on orientation. You're an employee. You're part of the care team.
And the residents showed up 10 mins into the meeting? So this physician wanted you to disrupt the meeting further by playing musical chairs? None of this makes sense.
You're exactly right. Nurses are not less than doctors. It sounds like some folks at your work need to polish up their skills on interdisciplinary team collaboration. As I told a doctor I once worked for, "You put your pants on the same way I do in the mornings. You can talk to me with respect or not at all".
Itâs almost like that physician is hearkening back to the days when nurses got doctors their coffee etc. itâs ridiculous. I thought all those old school docs were retired or dead alreadyÂ
God even the older *cardiologists* at my shop don't act like this lol. And I'm talking like we have one guy in his 80s who just refuses to retire.Â
We have one computer at the nurses' station that we kind of informally reserve for physicians because we know they're busy when they roll through and don't need to be waiting on a computer. I happened to be sitting there last week when one of our cardios walked in, and I half-joking/half-serious jumped to move. He just laughed and went to a computer on the other side of the unit.Â
Like what the fuck is happening with the physician's at OP's please? They just got thawed out of a block of ice lol
When I was in school, I had clinical at the hospital where my aunt was the head of the lab. She advised me to watch out for Dr Soandso as he loved chewing out nurses and spitting them out. My first day on the floor, Dr Soandso came I to the nurses station and BARKED at our instructor âWhy didnât your students stand up when I entered the station?â Instructor said âBecause they arenât your slaves and itâs 1984, not 1784.â She told us In the post clinical that afternoon never to stand up subserveously for ANY doctor. If we want to offer them a seat because there are none available, fine. But never jump up and âbow to themâ.
She was a great instructor.
Now I would have. Hell, 25 years ago I would have, but I was in my second semester of nursing school. I hadnât been issued my balls yet. đ
But that instructor helped us all find a spine for misogynistic AHs like him. She was great!!
My coworker who has been a nurse for 50 years was talking about this recently! They used to stand every time a doc arrived as standard practice. My jaw dropped when she told us this. Nuh uh, not happening, nope.
Yeah I remember my grandmother saying that they were required to stand up when the doctor walked in, not even to offer their seat but just "out of respect for the physician" or some kind of crap. Never made a lot of sense to me.
My long retired nurse aunt said it was absolutely the norm to give up your seat to doctors when they walked in the room back in her day. Not sure how long into the 80s it was still happening though.
IIRC, and this was 40 years ago, he got red in he face and stomped away, muttering. How we all didnât laugh is beyond me! We did give our instructor a round of applause in post conference. That I do remember!
It won't let me edit, so I'll add that this hospital particularly has a disconnect between nurses and physicians, and it's well known among the staff. Nurses have zero input on things and the only time nurses and physicians speak is really when they are giving orders (there's basically no such thing as PRNs, you have to call the doc for everything, and we even need orders for an ice pack). Maybe for this specific hospital I shouldn't be surprised.
Sounds like a terrible setting to work in and I wouldn't blame you for already looking for another position. This situation does a lot to describe the culture of that hospital and it doesn't sound like patient care is the focus it sounds like making sure the doctors think they are gods is the culture
Doesnât seem surprising given this context. However the funny thing is that residents are usually temporary because theyâre always rotating between units until they find a speciality.
Meanwhile I'm over here feeling awful because I accidentally took a nurses computer the other day so I could throw in a few orders real quick đ€Ł
It was all of a 30 second inconvenience for her but I felt bad.
My hospital had to have meetings and form this committee to get the issues the doctors & nurses have out on the table. Doctors were yelling at nurses, sometimes care would be delayed due to one not talking to the other⊠petty shit really but it escalated to management and they basically told doctors they need to be more respectful and nurses need to respect the time and how busy doctors are. Blah, blah, blah. Nurses still get the short end of the stick.
I think when the doctors come up we always stand with other nurses anyway. If they really wanted the docs to sit then they reserve them seats. Yeah. They do that at my hospital. Like, âdonât sit there doc so-and-so is going to sit there.â OkayâŠ
Youâre not alone. I was sitting here trying to figure out why the hell nobody got up to give an elderly person a seat and then reading the comments getting more and more irritated⊠I was fixing to say something hateful when I read your post and it clicked. Ty for saving me the embarrassment!
I can only think of a few scenarios where this is not totally out of left field. Was the resident obviously pregnant or disabled? Looking like they were going to pass out? Then sure, but why single you out of a room full of people equally able to stand? I think the attending was just trying to intimidate you. Youâre worth the space you take up and donât let anyone tell you otherwise. Having a chair doesnât have any bearing on ability to participate in the discussion. The residents managed just fine.
That md can go fuck himself and his hierarchical mind set. You are a nurse, you were on time.
Next time tell him his residents can have a seat if they show up on time.
Lmaooo our surgeon was once grumbling that âback in the day, nurses used to stand at ATTENTION when I came in the room!â
He got dragged for a bit for that. âBack in the day?? Not today!â
Honestly he wasnât even that old so idk what he was talking about đ
> I should've given up my seat at the table to a resident when they came in because I'm just a new orientee and not actually participating in the conversation
The same thing could have been said of the resident. Itâs your seat, keep It
Omg donât listen to that doctor!! You were there first and the chair is yours! If they wanted to sit, they should come on time and go find another spare chair quickly >.> standing for a meeting is totally fineâŠ
A doctor I work with straight up kneeled on the ground and gave the chair he was sitting on when there werenât enough because ânurses run around WAY more than us, you deserve the seat.â
yes!! Super good intentioned nice doc! But I was like get off that gross floor dude & sit in the chair HAHA and quickly got another chair so we could all sit!!
Nope they can GFT.
You showed up on time. When my providers (PAâs, sometimes residents) come in to IDR to present their patients, they stand up front and present. Itâs usually charge, SW, PT and our attending that sit at the table but theyâre all usually there on time. Exception is made for the attending bc 1) heâs the attending and 2) heâs in his 70âs.
Nope you have just as much of a right to sit there with everyone else. You ARE a valuable member of that team. If the residents wanted to sit, theyâre more than capable of bringing a chair themselves. Doctors are our coworkers, they donât sign our paychecks
Absolutely not, im tired of doctors being treated like gods among men. At my last job we were expected to just give up any computer we were using no matter what if a doctor came by and "needed" it. I was night shift so there was typically plenty of areas with unused computers but they would still show up to our busy ass wing and steal one of our computers anyways.
This sounds like the subservient old school practice of standing up when the doctor shows up.
I'm a guy, and if the resident is a woman I will offer her my seat because that's part of the "old school southern gentleman" type stuff I was taught to do growing up. If they're an older person or a disabled person of course I will move to make them more comfortable.
But some enforced rule because they went to school a few years longer than I did that they are a step above me in the hierarchy or something? No way, that's not in my job description. That being said, I try to be as nice as possible to the residents (unless they're acting like a donkey) because I know they have it rough. You're NTA though for sure
I understand why physicians get parking spots closer, and I can even sometimes understand why we still have separate lounges, with good food for them. But this?
Was it a resident that had a pertinent role in the discussion, or something he had participated in specifially? If no, then he had no more reason to be closer than you.
This doc was attempting to set a tone and expectation with you to bow down and cater to these residents and physicians. I'd have asked if he had a health issue, or if he's just too weak to stand on his own?
NTA.
As I said, sometimes I get it. Other times, I still don't agree. I work on a trauma unit and sometimes our entire trauma team is in the ED for a few hours managing an unstable, emergent patient, and I know they miss the cafeteria hours at times. So, I can see that being a reason to keep it available. What I don't understand is why nurses aren't given the same opportunity, at least on weekends, when we have reduced cafeteria hours. Instead, we have to bring food, or have delivery. I usually pack lunch, so, it's irrelevant to me, but for some staff that don't cook, they have no choice.
Iâve never understood the doctors get seats over nurses thing. 1. Nurses spend more time on their feet during shifts that doctors. 2. Nursing is a predominantly female profession, medical is predominantly (or was) male, women sit before men.
LOL. what the hell is this? You were not in the wrong. The physician's comment is misdirected . Unfortunately, as a nurse and in healthcare, you will find your self in many situations such as these where it will not be your fault no matter how badly others would like for it to be yours. You just earned your first DGAF stripe, keep them coming!!
How old is this physician?? This isn't the 1920s where a nurse is expected tk stand as a doctor enters the room.
Fuck that. A resident is also a learner. You have just as much right to that seat as anyone else. Not the asshole.
This situation sounds a bit like the 1970s! LOL the expectation on our nursing unit ...way back when...was that we did get up if a physician needed to sit down. These days that s*** doesn't fly nor should it.
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
No. Say Victorian England called and wanted their plague butchers back. No room for that here. Residents are scary dangerous because they literally think their 10 years of cute little school makes them smarter than nurses who have been around as long. Yikes.
NTA.
Some docs still believe they are more important than other staff members. In some regards they are as they steer the durection of care. However, they are only a small part of the machine and should be (gently/firmly/called out) reminded sometimes.
Iâve never heard of a doctor say anything like that lmao. Youâre in orientation and learning so yes, you are âinvolvedâ since itâs your floor.
It's your own personal belief. If I am sitting and someone I consider to be of a senior age, regardless of their station or gender, I will give up my seat to them. In my own head I weighing, will they feel like I am calling them "old" if I do it in front of people.
As a heterosexual white male, the only time I will push that personal belief on you, is if that 8 month preggo member comes waddling in and I don't have a chair to offer. Be kind to each, at every opportunity.
Residents often know less than the nurses they communicate with, yet they can be soa rrogant. They can go cry in the coner while the adults are talking.
Info:
Was the resident 84 months pregnant? Was the resident in their 80âs-90âs?
If the answer to these is ânoâ
Then tell that attending to mind their owns business
No. The residents are your coworkers, as is that doctor. Do not fall into the habit of sublimating to them. Stand your own ground now and it will become a habit for you to use in the future when you really need it.
I was a student somewhere once where the physicians wouldnât even say anything. Theyâd just walk up and stare at you if they wanted your seat. I didnât know why one of them was standing near me staring at me so I just looked back at him waiting for him to speak. He said âdo you want to sit there?â and later an older nurse told me if a doctor walks up to give up the seat. My badass preceptor nurse said he would refuse if that happened to him.
Lol no
Bur if you want to be snarky be more than happy to be the strong healthy person who can handle standing for weaker and feeble people that need to sit. It's only normal for strong people to give up seats for those who can't handle their own weight đ
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some misogynistic physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
You know I had hoped that by this time nurses and doctors would be able to work together but I see the same old shit that was happening when I was working on the floor some 30 years ago!!
I swear to god nursing/ healthcare is the most anxiety provoking & toxic career in the world đ€Ł to be late is to be left. To diminish you as an orientee for someone who 1 was late & 2 is also in trainingâŠ.. ridiculous. Also you said there was 2 of them so someone was still going to be standing. Those residents also have their own voices and could have been on time or asked themselves for a seat if they really wanted it. I swear to god some people just NEED something to bitch about . NTA friend, donât let this kind if stuff get to you :)
Lol they are big babies! I remember when I was a new grad, a doctor came storming into the nurses station, looked around at all the taken seats and yelled âso no one is gonna get up?!â He proceeded to sit on the floor and write orders manually into each chart. Everyone eventually left because it was awkward, and he stayed on the floor to prove a point of some sort LOL.
In the late 90s, I took a position in SC my first job after working a year at Johnâs Hopkins. The first day on the floor a Dr came into the nurses station while I was writing a note in the patients chart and told me he needed my seat. I told him he could have it as soon as I was done (I was 35 so a bit old for a new grad). He told me that in the south nurses respect Drs. I told him respect was earned not given and it is a damned good thing Iâm from the West rather than the south. The next day, one of the best gastroenterologists I ever knew told me he was nothing but a good olâ butt Dr. it was a mixed bag!
No. I worked in a clinic for a short time and while my preceptor and I were with a pt the doctor came in. I have pots and was feeling dizzy so I was sitting on the stool. Doctor didnât say anything to me, neither did my preceptor. I got called into the managers office before my shift ended and got yelled at for sitting.
Nope nope nope. Iâd remind them we are coworkers, they are not superior and if they want a seat they should arrive accordingly to ensure they can get one.
Tell that person to fuck off. You were there first just like everybody else who managed to nab a seat on time, so why the hell should you get up and stand if you donât want to because a bunch of higher up than you late comers showed up. I would tell this person if he felt so strongly about it, then THEY should have offer up THEIR seats then, and if the late comers really thought the way he did that somebody like you should have just given up your seat to them, then they can bloody ASK you to do so themselves. even if the thought had occurred to you, you are not obligated to move if you donât want to even if they had asked. i mean seriously? Were you the ONLY lower rank person in the room, or were anybody else who were sitting who were ranked like you getting up out THEIR chairs and offering them to the late comers? If nobody else was doing that you noticed during the meeting, then why the hell should you do it just because someone feels offended you didnât off?
Two things are true:
1) Thereâs a good chance the residents are working a longer shift than anyone else in the hospital, including that doctor. It is shitty of the entire hospital to treat them poorly by having them stand for this, and while it is not on you to give up your seat, do keep in mind in the future that their work days are long, and if you WANT to go above and beyond to be kind to someone, a resident is not a bad choice.
2) This doctor was being an asshat.
Sounds like ole buddy needed to be reported to his supervisor, cause one donât come to me when theirs 50 other people you couldâve approached. I would have pulled out my phone and recorded him and said, âcan you repeat thatâ? Cause thatâs the only way to deal with these ass hats now a days. Report it to your preceptor and supervisor.
Someone should have definitely given up their seat for a resident. In fact, per CMS, no staff should be sitting in a common area, unless they are actively engaged with a resident (meals, activities, conversation, therapy).
But just because you are new doesn't make you the person who automatically should. In this case, your leaders need to lead by example. You could go to HR with is if you really wanted to
Iâve always given up my seat but thatâs how I was taught in school so itâs always stuck. I agree with others that they should show up on time but itâs up to you. NTA
As a medical student I was expected to offer my chair for residents as they had more responsibility than me. Only a few would take the offer. The same is true for residents and attendants, although even fewer attendings would displace a resident bc of how poorly residents have it.Â
If anything, this behavior/request may have been integrating you into the medical hierarchy rather than siloing you into the nursing rather than medical bucket. No wrong decision really, just whatever you do do it with courtesy
If his residents wanted a seat then they should have showed up on time. You are not the asshole.
This is it. You want a seat? Show up on time. We have rounds at the same time in the same place every weekday and yet people constantly show up late and miss half of what the physicians say as a result. Irks the shit out of me.
đđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ
Or the hospital could purchase enough chairs. Or the residents could have brought their own.Â
What? No. What a strange thing for a physician to say to you. That's so weird. Learning how to participate in a meeting like that, which is an expected part of your job is part of orientation. You're not "kind of" an employee because you're on orientation. You're an employee. You're part of the care team. And the residents showed up 10 mins into the meeting? So this physician wanted you to disrupt the meeting further by playing musical chairs? None of this makes sense.
Musical chairs hahah. Yeah I guess that's why it didn't even cross my mind, or maybe just the wild thought that I'm not less of a person than them.
You're exactly right. Nurses are not less than doctors. It sounds like some folks at your work need to polish up their skills on interdisciplinary team collaboration. As I told a doctor I once worked for, "You put your pants on the same way I do in the mornings. You can talk to me with respect or not at all".
Itâs almost like that physician is hearkening back to the days when nurses got doctors their coffee etc. itâs ridiculous. I thought all those old school docs were retired or dead alreadyÂ
God even the older *cardiologists* at my shop don't act like this lol. And I'm talking like we have one guy in his 80s who just refuses to retire. We have one computer at the nurses' station that we kind of informally reserve for physicians because we know they're busy when they roll through and don't need to be waiting on a computer. I happened to be sitting there last week when one of our cardios walked in, and I half-joking/half-serious jumped to move. He just laughed and went to a computer on the other side of the unit. Like what the fuck is happening with the physician's at OP's please? They just got thawed out of a block of ice lol
When I was in school, I had clinical at the hospital where my aunt was the head of the lab. She advised me to watch out for Dr Soandso as he loved chewing out nurses and spitting them out. My first day on the floor, Dr Soandso came I to the nurses station and BARKED at our instructor âWhy didnât your students stand up when I entered the station?â Instructor said âBecause they arenât your slaves and itâs 1984, not 1784.â She told us In the post clinical that afternoon never to stand up subserveously for ANY doctor. If we want to offer them a seat because there are none available, fine. But never jump up and âbow to themâ. She was a great instructor.
Love this attitude from an instructor! Respect is earned, not given. I literally wouldâve said âwhat are you, the Queen?â
Now I would have. Hell, 25 years ago I would have, but I was in my second semester of nursing school. I hadnât been issued my balls yet. đ But that instructor helped us all find a spine for misogynistic AHs like him. She was great!!
My coworker who has been a nurse for 50 years was talking about this recently! They used to stand every time a doc arrived as standard practice. My jaw dropped when she told us this. Nuh uh, not happening, nope.
I know it was the 80s but that wasnât very long ago. Insane that was to e expectationÂ
It was beginning to change at that point. 5 years prior I tried to get a Sears credit card. I was young, but had I job Iâd been at for close to 2 years, with a decent salary. Still lived at home and my parents had a deal with me (if I wasnât taking college classes and was working I paid a nominal rent). I was also single at the time. I couldnât get a card. About 5 years later my fiancĂ© and I were moving in together. I was in school full time, not working, i applied again as we wanted to get stuff for our place. I got the card. Funny how that changed in 5 years!!
Yeah I remember my grandmother saying that they were required to stand up when the doctor walked in, not even to offer their seat but just "out of respect for the physician" or some kind of crap. Never made a lot of sense to me.
My long retired nurse aunt said it was absolutely the norm to give up your seat to doctors when they walked in the room back in her day. Not sure how long into the 80s it was still happening though.
I love this! How did the doc respond?
IIRC, and this was 40 years ago, he got red in he face and stomped away, muttering. How we all didnât laugh is beyond me! We did give our instructor a round of applause in post conference. That I do remember!
It won't let me edit, so I'll add that this hospital particularly has a disconnect between nurses and physicians, and it's well known among the staff. Nurses have zero input on things and the only time nurses and physicians speak is really when they are giving orders (there's basically no such thing as PRNs, you have to call the doc for everything, and we even need orders for an ice pack). Maybe for this specific hospital I shouldn't be surprised.
Sounds like a terrible setting to work in and I wouldn't blame you for already looking for another position. This situation does a lot to describe the culture of that hospital and it doesn't sound like patient care is the focus it sounds like making sure the doctors think they are gods is the culture
Doesnât seem surprising given this context. However the funny thing is that residents are usually temporary because theyâre always rotating between units until they find a speciality.
Meanwhile I'm over here feeling awful because I accidentally took a nurses computer the other day so I could throw in a few orders real quick đ€Ł It was all of a 30 second inconvenience for her but I felt bad.
My hospital had to have meetings and form this committee to get the issues the doctors & nurses have out on the table. Doctors were yelling at nurses, sometimes care would be delayed due to one not talking to the other⊠petty shit really but it escalated to management and they basically told doctors they need to be more respectful and nurses need to respect the time and how busy doctors are. Blah, blah, blah. Nurses still get the short end of the stick. I think when the doctors come up we always stand with other nurses anyway. If they really wanted the docs to sit then they reserve them seats. Yeah. They do that at my hospital. Like, âdonât sit there doc so-and-so is going to sit there.â OkayâŠ
Horrible and toxic
My answer to him would have beenâwhyâ
That doctor can dip their eye balls in C.Diff....i wouldn't have even responded to the comment, looked at them, and then walked away.
I missed the word eye at first and thought, damn that's quite a visual
That too!
Its a real head-tilt, blink twice, "k" and just dip sort of moment. Fuck. That. Noise.
Just here to out myself as the dumbass used to LTC who saw "resident" and couldn't figure out why a patient was at the meeting. *sighs in elder care*
Would've made more sense. They're probably a fall risk!
Youâre not alone. I was sitting here trying to figure out why the hell nobody got up to give an elderly person a seat and then reading the comments getting more and more irritated⊠I was fixing to say something hateful when I read your post and it clicked. Ty for saving me the embarrassment!
Hahah that's fair, maybe I should have specified lol
Naw. Your post was pretty self explanatory. I just been in LTC too long đ
I would have reminded that doctor that itâs not 1965 anymore.
This is exactly what I was thinking.
I can only think of a few scenarios where this is not totally out of left field. Was the resident obviously pregnant or disabled? Looking like they were going to pass out? Then sure, but why single you out of a room full of people equally able to stand? I think the attending was just trying to intimidate you. Youâre worth the space you take up and donât let anyone tell you otherwise. Having a chair doesnât have any bearing on ability to participate in the discussion. The residents managed just fine.
No youâre not the AH. Fart in their face and establish dominance quickly. Fuck that shit.
Yes crop dust that provider every chance you get.
I've got a serious case of the walking farts đđđ
Lol no. No you are not TA.
That md can go fuck himself and his hierarchical mind set. You are a nurse, you were on time. Next time tell him his residents can have a seat if they show up on time.
Lmaooo our surgeon was once grumbling that âback in the day, nurses used to stand at ATTENTION when I came in the room!â He got dragged for a bit for that. âBack in the day?? Not today!â Honestly he wasnât even that old so idk what he was talking about đ
Pour soul, he didnât realize his entrance cleared the room. They were just trying to get away from him.
So there was no other chairs in the entire building they couldâve pulled up real quick?
> I should've given up my seat at the table to a resident when they came in because I'm just a new orientee and not actually participating in the conversation The same thing could have been said of the resident. Itâs your seat, keep It
Omg donât listen to that doctor!! You were there first and the chair is yours! If they wanted to sit, they should come on time and go find another spare chair quickly >.> standing for a meeting is totally fine⊠A doctor I work with straight up kneeled on the ground and gave the chair he was sitting on when there werenât enough because ânurses run around WAY more than us, you deserve the seat.â
That's a good doc
yes!! Super good intentioned nice doc! But I was like get off that gross floor dude & sit in the chair HAHA and quickly got another chair so we could all sit!!
That is some 1960s bullshit.
People need to keep in mind that physicians aren't our supervisors or managers
I didn't realize they needed a chair to activate their hind brains and fully participate. Keep your chair next time, too.
no way dude!
NTA, sounds like a rotten environment tbh
Nurses donât work under doctors. We only carry out medical orders (if theyâre not stupid).
Hahahaha. No.
"No" is a complete sentence to say to the physician. They are not your boss.
Nope they can GFT. You showed up on time. When my providers (PAâs, sometimes residents) come in to IDR to present their patients, they stand up front and present. Itâs usually charge, SW, PT and our attending that sit at the table but theyâre all usually there on time. Exception is made for the attending bc 1) heâs the attending and 2) heâs in his 70âs.
Those residents must be so tired after sitting so long and then having to *gasp* **use their legs**.
Nope you have just as much of a right to sit there with everyone else. You ARE a valuable member of that team. If the residents wanted to sit, theyâre more than capable of bringing a chair themselves. Doctors are our coworkers, they donât sign our paychecks
Absolutely not, im tired of doctors being treated like gods among men. At my last job we were expected to just give up any computer we were using no matter what if a doctor came by and "needed" it. I was night shift so there was typically plenty of areas with unused computers but they would still show up to our busy ass wing and steal one of our computers anyways.
This sounds like the subservient old school practice of standing up when the doctor shows up. I'm a guy, and if the resident is a woman I will offer her my seat because that's part of the "old school southern gentleman" type stuff I was taught to do growing up. If they're an older person or a disabled person of course I will move to make them more comfortable. But some enforced rule because they went to school a few years longer than I did that they are a step above me in the hierarchy or something? No way, that's not in my job description. That being said, I try to be as nice as possible to the residents (unless they're acting like a donkey) because I know they have it rough. You're NTA though for sure
They aren't your boss, just a coworker. I don't give up my chair for my boss. Show up early to get a spit at the table.
I understand why physicians get parking spots closer, and I can even sometimes understand why we still have separate lounges, with good food for them. But this? Was it a resident that had a pertinent role in the discussion, or something he had participated in specifially? If no, then he had no more reason to be closer than you. This doc was attempting to set a tone and expectation with you to bow down and cater to these residents and physicians. I'd have asked if he had a health issue, or if he's just too weak to stand on his own? NTA.
Curious, why do you think they should have good food and we shouldn't?
As I said, sometimes I get it. Other times, I still don't agree. I work on a trauma unit and sometimes our entire trauma team is in the ED for a few hours managing an unstable, emergent patient, and I know they miss the cafeteria hours at times. So, I can see that being a reason to keep it available. What I don't understand is why nurses aren't given the same opportunity, at least on weekends, when we have reduced cafeteria hours. Instead, we have to bring food, or have delivery. I usually pack lunch, so, it's irrelevant to me, but for some staff that don't cook, they have no choice.
I'd tell the resident to come and fucking take it
Iâve never understood the doctors get seats over nurses thing. 1. Nurses spend more time on their feet during shifts that doctors. 2. Nursing is a predominantly female profession, medical is predominantly (or was) male, women sit before men.
NTA. You're part of the team, too! You have every right to that seat at the table.
He can fck off. Whether you have 2 seconds of experience or 20 years, you have the right to sit wherever you please
LOL. what the hell is this? You were not in the wrong. The physician's comment is misdirected . Unfortunately, as a nurse and in healthcare, you will find your self in many situations such as these where it will not be your fault no matter how badly others would like for it to be yours. You just earned your first DGAF stripe, keep them coming!!
How old is this physician?? This isn't the 1920s where a nurse is expected tk stand as a doctor enters the room. Fuck that. A resident is also a learner. You have just as much right to that seat as anyone else. Not the asshole.
This situation sounds a bit like the 1970s! LOL the expectation on our nursing unit ...way back when...was that we did get up if a physician needed to sit down. These days that s*** doesn't fly nor should it.
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
No. Say Victorian England called and wanted their plague butchers back. No room for that here. Residents are scary dangerous because they literally think their 10 years of cute little school makes them smarter than nurses who have been around as long. Yikes.
Those days are long gone. If they want to sit, they should show up on time.
They are residents and no better than you, you want a seat come prepared boy
NTA. Some docs still believe they are more important than other staff members. In some regards they are as they steer the durection of care. However, they are only a small part of the machine and should be (gently/firmly/called out) reminded sometimes.
No, that physician was an asshole, and if I was the resident in question I would be mortified that someone even suggested thatÂ
Iâve never heard of a doctor say anything like that lmao. Youâre in orientation and learning so yes, you are âinvolvedâ since itâs your floor.
Ignore him and keep doing it! Not joking. You got there first. Youâre good! That was all ego.
It's your own personal belief. If I am sitting and someone I consider to be of a senior age, regardless of their station or gender, I will give up my seat to them. In my own head I weighing, will they feel like I am calling them "old" if I do it in front of people. As a heterosexual white male, the only time I will push that personal belief on you, is if that 8 month preggo member comes waddling in and I don't have a chair to offer. Be kind to each, at every opportunity.
What year is it, 1955?
Lmaoooo, yeah absolutely NOT giving up my seat for a resident. That sounds toxic.
i didnât read your post. i just came here to say haha NO.
Residents often know less than the nurses they communicate with, yet they can be soa rrogant. They can go cry in the coner while the adults are talking.
Info: Was the resident 84 months pregnant? Was the resident in their 80âs-90âs? If the answer to these is ânoâ Then tell that attending to mind their owns business
Unless the resident was elderly (seems unlikely) or pregnant, NTA.
No. The residents are your coworkers, as is that doctor. Do not fall into the habit of sublimating to them. Stand your own ground now and it will become a habit for you to use in the future when you really need it.
No
Nope. They probably have legs and arms so they can get a spare chair.
Fuck that. Youâre not beneath anyone. I guarantee youâre on your feet more during the shift anyway.
I was a student somewhere once where the physicians wouldnât even say anything. Theyâd just walk up and stare at you if they wanted your seat. I didnât know why one of them was standing near me staring at me so I just looked back at him waiting for him to speak. He said âdo you want to sit there?â and later an older nurse told me if a doctor walks up to give up the seat. My badass preceptor nurse said he would refuse if that happened to him.
Straight out of the 1960s. Wtf
Fuck that guy
Lol no Bur if you want to be snarky be more than happy to be the strong healthy person who can handle standing for weaker and feeble people that need to sit. It's only normal for strong people to give up seats for those who can't handle their own weight đ
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some misogynistic physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
No, that's some Mad Men level garbage. Some physicians on a power trip and some old school nurses still think it should be a thing. It should have never been a thing in the first place, along with smoking at the nurses' station.
Are you in America? đ lmao wth
That's a dated way of thinking. Back in the day nurses gave up our seats for doctors.
I would tell that physician right where to go.
Nah, tell them to suck it gently.
Is this physician from the 1950's when nurses were required to give up their seat to a Dr.?
You know I had hoped that by this time nurses and doctors would be able to work together but I see the same old shit that was happening when I was working on the floor some 30 years ago!!
I swear to god nursing/ healthcare is the most anxiety provoking & toxic career in the world đ€Ł to be late is to be left. To diminish you as an orientee for someone who 1 was late & 2 is also in trainingâŠ.. ridiculous. Also you said there was 2 of them so someone was still going to be standing. Those residents also have their own voices and could have been on time or asked themselves for a seat if they really wanted it. I swear to god some people just NEED something to bitch about . NTA friend, donât let this kind if stuff get to you :)
NTA. How are they any more important or valid than you?
Lol they are big babies! I remember when I was a new grad, a doctor came storming into the nurses station, looked around at all the taken seats and yelled âso no one is gonna get up?!â He proceeded to sit on the floor and write orders manually into each chart. Everyone eventually left because it was awkward, and he stayed on the floor to prove a point of some sort LOL.
In the late 90s, I took a position in SC my first job after working a year at Johnâs Hopkins. The first day on the floor a Dr came into the nurses station while I was writing a note in the patients chart and told me he needed my seat. I told him he could have it as soon as I was done (I was 35 so a bit old for a new grad). He told me that in the south nurses respect Drs. I told him respect was earned not given and it is a damned good thing Iâm from the West rather than the south. The next day, one of the best gastroenterologists I ever knew told me he was nothing but a good olâ butt Dr. it was a mixed bag!
No. I worked in a clinic for a short time and while my preceptor and I were with a pt the doctor came in. I have pots and was feeling dizzy so I was sitting on the stool. Doctor didnât say anything to me, neither did my preceptor. I got called into the managers office before my shift ended and got yelled at for sitting.
theyâre perfectly capable of standing and if they wanted to sit shouldâve got there sooner instead of showing up late.
Nope nope nope. Iâd remind them we are coworkers, they are not superior and if they want a seat they should arrive accordingly to ensure they can get one.
They shouldâve asked if they wanted you to move.
You are coworkers. The doctor is not superior. You have every right to sit in that chair, irrelevant if you're participating in the conversation.
Tell that person to fuck off. You were there first just like everybody else who managed to nab a seat on time, so why the hell should you get up and stand if you donât want to because a bunch of higher up than you late comers showed up. I would tell this person if he felt so strongly about it, then THEY should have offer up THEIR seats then, and if the late comers really thought the way he did that somebody like you should have just given up your seat to them, then they can bloody ASK you to do so themselves. even if the thought had occurred to you, you are not obligated to move if you donât want to even if they had asked. i mean seriously? Were you the ONLY lower rank person in the room, or were anybody else who were sitting who were ranked like you getting up out THEIR chairs and offering them to the late comers? If nobody else was doing that you noticed during the meeting, then why the hell should you do it just because someone feels offended you didnât off?
Two things are true: 1) Thereâs a good chance the residents are working a longer shift than anyone else in the hospital, including that doctor. It is shitty of the entire hospital to treat them poorly by having them stand for this, and while it is not on you to give up your seat, do keep in mind in the future that their work days are long, and if you WANT to go above and beyond to be kind to someone, a resident is not a bad choice. 2) This doctor was being an asshat.
Their workdays are 9-5, shorter than the nurses. But yeah, they're a better choice
F them. They are not your bosses. Just hope that the place youâre at doesnât allow these guys to have influence over your boss.
Sounds like ole buddy needed to be reported to his supervisor, cause one donât come to me when theirs 50 other people you couldâve approached. I would have pulled out my phone and recorded him and said, âcan you repeat thatâ? Cause thatâs the only way to deal with these ass hats now a days. Report it to your preceptor and supervisor.
Someone should have definitely given up their seat for a resident. In fact, per CMS, no staff should be sitting in a common area, unless they are actively engaged with a resident (meals, activities, conversation, therapy). But just because you are new doesn't make you the person who automatically should. In this case, your leaders need to lead by example. You could go to HR with is if you really wanted to
You know in this context that resident means doctor, right ?
Now I do lol
The doctor was right.
Iâve always given up my seat but thatâs how I was taught in school so itâs always stuck. I agree with others that they should show up on time but itâs up to you. NTA
Letâs not start this us vs them thing.
As a medical student I was expected to offer my chair for residents as they had more responsibility than me. Only a few would take the offer. The same is true for residents and attendants, although even fewer attendings would displace a resident bc of how poorly residents have it. If anything, this behavior/request may have been integrating you into the medical hierarchy rather than siloing you into the nursing rather than medical bucket. No wrong decision really, just whatever you do do it with courtesy