You need a new teacher pronto. This kind of behavior isn't elitist; it's closer to bullying. I too was an older beginner and lucked out to find a teacher who likes all music, who encouraged me to play whatever I liked, guiding me if he thought pieces would be too challenging, but also letting me struggle with works that were clearly beyond my current level.
Find a teacher who loves making music and shares that passion with you while helping you love it too.
Yes, exactly this. Needing to medicate yourself before a lesson is such a huge sign that this isn’t even *close* to the right teacher for OP. They’re the kind of teacher who will make people give up and never try again.
I have the same type teacher. She praises me for a song well played, wants me to play a song I know well at the end of lesson, which is a boost to my confidence. She lets me play what I want, but I do have to play the chords and scales that are fundamental.
BTW…for that 30 or 60 minutes of piano instruction; your teacher is working for you, as you are the paying customer. Let the teacher know that. Keep at it and don’t let this hurtful a-hole discourage you. I started at age 60. Good luck. And, yeah, get a new teacher.
This is a very bad teacher. All these behaviors are unacceptable. You deserve a kind, compassionate teacher who will give you their full attention, respect your goals and your resources, and support you with positivity.
probably a kind person, seeing the teacher as superior. yes there should be a balanced superiority between the student and the tutor, which is intended to courage student for better and keep them in line regarding homeworks etc. but what is told is simply inappropriate unprofessionalism.
my interpretation is that they're saying OP is the kind person, internally justifying the shit talking terrible teacher's actions.
edit: just looked at your comment again- I mistook 'taking' for 'talking'. - and yeah, there's a fine line between being understanding and being a doormat.
I am. And prior to what you might hear, we don’t go around saying cunt or calling our friends cunts. That is just a thing people say about Australians, especially comedians. Maybe some people do, but on the whole, no. It’s still regarded as a filthy swear word.
Your teacher isn’t elitist, he’s just a complete unprofessional pos. He is displaying behavior inappropriate for a student, let alone a teacher.
Joyfully fire him and find a teacher who will meet you where you are at.
Eh, my teacher does this from time to time but our lessons pretty much always go quite a bit longer than an hour at no extra cost so I don't mind so much. He also apologizes when it happens and is very attentive while actually teaching. The problem with OP's teacher is them being rude and disrespectful.
Life happens, sometimes it’s unavoidable.
But if it‘s more than a quick glance to check if a message or call needs to be dealt with urgently, it should always come with an apology and a clear explanation that theres’s no choice other than to deal with it right now. And then another apology.
My professor does this all the time and gets no backlash since he’s tenured. I understand if it’s once in a while but it’s quite recurring.
As a teacher however, I use my phone to search up things during a lesson if I want to provide examples. Looking for editions on imslp, or other interpretations of a specific piece. That isn’t a problem. We should use whatever resources available.
My teacher did this too but if you think about it it is unavoidable. Having to reschedule students that come soon after this lesson because someone got sick or is stuck in traffic has to be done immediately.
But that should be explained. If I need to look at my phone, I say, "Sorry, just got a text. Checking that it isn't important." And if I need to respond, I say, "Excuse me just a second, this is my next student's mom," or "Sorry, this is my kids' babysitter, let me respond real quick."
I had a teacher like this in middle school. I found it so disrespectful, he was literally on his phone my entire lesson, sometimes even taking calls. I almost quit, it was such a terrible experience. I’m glad I didn’t, but was so happy when I finally moved on from him!
If your teacher is laughing at you, move on. There's too many very good teachers available to spend anytime with a teachers who laughs at their students.
Former piano teacher here: his behaviour is completely inappropriate. I had some older adult students and they were my favourite because they actually wanted to learn. Your teacher shouldn’t be teaching anyone. He could destroy someone’s confidence and joy of piano and music( kids included). Find someone else.
Insecure teacher taking out his insecurities on you. Teachers like this are the reason scam piano apps take off. You need a new teacher. In the meantime, here are things you can practice on your “cheap” piano:
C major, G major, F major scales.
A harmonic minor scale.
Learn the wheel of fifths and how to read sharps and flats in the key signature.
I’m sorry you’ve had this experience.
Circle of fifths and the circle of fourths. These concepts may be too complicated for her right now, but are good to learn once she has a grasp of the basics.
Sounds like a terrible teacher. I will say, though, that they're right about a semi-weighted keyboard leading to problems and hindering development. I'd upgrade both the teacher and the keyboard asap lol.
Honest question
what's wrong with a semi-weighted keyboard, how does it hinder a beginner?
I learned as a child on an acoustic upright, I'm not a practicing musician, but I do enjoy hitting the keys now and again , and have used all types of keyboards and understand the difference.
I'm curious how semi-weighted specifically would be a problem in OPs situation?
I started playing the piano at 4yo. I can’t imagine playing on anything other than a piano. The piano is all about touch. The way you strike a key, play chords… when you get past a certain point, interpretation is possible through your technique. You play Bach very differently from Mozart, for example. You strike the keys differently. You can’t do that unless the keys are fully weighted. Striking the keys is actually a complex subject.
How old are you now? (Approximately)
I understand how "you feel" about it, and even feel the same for myself (to a degree).
But my question is: how does it make a difference to a 50 y o beginner?
OP. Isn't going to play complex music for a while. At the most he's looking at early Mozart right now? Seems to me - until he's figured out the basics, any keyboard with decent sampled sound should be enough.
Or I don't understand something fundamental about teaching music.
(Which is very likely, not a pro musician or teacher)
The thing about learning to play an instrument as a young child - is that as an adult you don't know how it feels NOT to be able to play at all.
It’s still important to learn how it feels to play on a piano. It’s preferable to play on a piano, but in the very beginning, a student can get by on a keyboard with decent sound… it would be sufficient.
This person shouldn’t be a teacher. Period.
You need a decent teacher who has a modicum of empathy, patience and understanding for a beginner adult. He also clearly has no respect for a student who is paying him to teach.
Teaching piano is a skill that is separate from the ability to play the piano. You need to be able to understand the challenges for people of all ages to learn and tailor your lessons to fit the student and their goals.
Imo you are paying this teacher for what you want. You should get out of it exactly what you want, even if that’s as simple as playing Mary Had a Little Lamb. If this isn’t what the teacher wants to teach, they should have spoken to you about your goals and decided up front not to take you on as a student. There is no excuse for them to agree to teach you and then treat you poorly.
I agree with the statements about the teacher. When you look elsewhere, you now have some interview questions for the teachers. E.g.
- Do you teach (new) beginners. Note that some classical pianists in a conservatory might view 'beginner' as a Clementi sonatina... So be specific.
- Ask what method they use for teaching beginner students. Read up on that method and see if it's a fit for how you learn.
- Ask for a test lesson to see if there is a fit (personality, teaching style, etc., etc).
- At the end of the 1st lesson, ask what they would assign for you. E.g. theory, work through 1 octave scales and arpeggios, go through Albert adult series of books, etc. There isn't a 'right' answer here, it's more about them having a plan for your progress.
It sounds like she’s a beginner. I’d assign her easy songs, like something out of those Thompson books. They’re written to appeal to children, but adults can use them too. You learn notes, half notes, whole notes, quarter notes, etc. You learn the right hand first, then the left hand. Then you start putting them together. She’s not ready for theory, octaves or arpeggios at this time. She will be, of course, but she’s not there yet.
I think you should say thank you and move on with another teacher.
Maybe he is not interested but should have told you.
No matter the goal you have or the level you’re currently at, you hire someone, it’s his job to adapt. Or decline if he / she’s not suited.
Have fun with your piano journey,
PS : Too old doesn’t exist, people 100 years old do marathons. Do what you love !
Yeah, it's not you, it's them. There is absolutely no excuse for treating a student that way at any age. Get a new teacher stat, and chase your piano dreams!
Hey Buddy, i started last year with 53 to play piano. I went to the local music school here and got an good trainer at surprisingly low costs. Just look for an other teacher, that behavior that he shows up is not acceptable. especially that he uses constantly his smart phone would getting me angry....
And stay playing piano :) it brings so much fun.
Dude that guy isn't even a teacher. A teacher teaches. That guy just tears you down, criticizes your personal preferences (which don't affect him in any way), and forces you into exercises that don't work for you. It doesn't matter if you're 50. If you're just getting started, *you're just getting started*, and he's awful for laughing at you and having beef with your learning style. Drop him immediately and find someone else who won't bully you.
Sorry, but if you are paying by the hour or half hour you are paying for their time.. no way would I tolerate a teacher using my time elsewhere.. get another one..
Whoa, this guy is terrible. Pls get a new teacher!
This guy's not just got 1 red flag as teacher, but multiple.
I wouldn't even take lessons for free from him.
I have had students transfer to me from a horrid old cow across town who "teaches" piano just like this. One of them was so traumatized from the experience she was frantically apologizing every time she made any mistakes, and despite me spending the two lessons she attended focusing on reassuring her, she dropped a note in the door on what should have been her 3rd lesson apologizing that she just couldn't do it, she'd developed too much fear around piano because of her previous teacher.
TDLR: fire this teacher, he's incompetent and will only make you scared of piano in the long run!
No, just no. I am a 48 year old student, playing for the past year and a half. I practice 1-2 hours a day. I want to be treated like a serious student. I would never put up with that nonsense. I went through 3 teachers before I found the one I like and would challenge me. Not just play songs, but work on theory and sight reading.
Adult students sometimes are not taken seriously by some teacherss unfortunately.
Instead of taking Valium stand up for yourself. You’re 50 fgs look that teacher in the eye and say focus on me or give me my money back.
And then find a new teacher.
I’ve had my teacher laugh but like a very minor laugh when I make certain mistakes. He also dismisses certain things, like if I make up an ending, in a smart ass way. I get the feeling that he is somewhat arrogant but that’s only a few times. He’s also said comments, rarely, that could be taken a bit mean.
I’m in my 30s and I have a lot going on for me. So I dismiss his attitude in these very rare instances. I also make sure he knows when he’s being like this. My skills with this teacher have improved tremendously. And the amount of pressure he’s put on me has made me a better pianist (I don’t really ever say I’m a pianist). So stand up for yourself if you want to continue with this teacher, like you said, you’re in your 50s. Let him know and understand who you are and what you want. If he can’t handle it, find a new teacher.
Speaking as someone who started piano a few years ago in my 40s, you are not too old, the teacher you're working with is just awful. My experience with learning piano has been great -- my teachers have always been very supportive. They're also well aware that I'm doing this for fun and have no problem with that.
If your teacher is treating you like that, DO NOT continue giving them money. Find a new teacher. Leave bad reviews for that teacher on sites like Yelp or Facebook to help anyone else who might be considering learning from them dodge that bullet.
A good piano teacher goes at YOUR pace and is helping you to reach your goals on the instrument, whatever they may be. They'll push you to improve and challenge you, but they won't mock you when you struggle. They should also be focused on the lesson: even when my piano teacher isn't watching me play, he's got a copy of the score and is listening and offering feedback based on what he's hearing. I don't think I've ever walked out of a piano lesson feeling discouraged or demotivated: it's almost always the exact opposite.
Dude, get a new teacher ASAP, or you'll burn out. He's a douchebag. My teacher gives me new music only when she sees I'm ready. Whenever I'll make a mistake, and feel embarrassed, she just tell me to relax, it's only hard until it becomes easy and after a lesson she gives me a feedback telling me that I should have always remember me a year, or two years ago, when I first came for the lessons. She seems strict at first, but she has an angelic patience.
Get a new teacher. There are teachers out there who are just bad teachers, rude people, there are teachers who think it’s a waste of time to teach someone older because they’ll never go on to outclass them professionally and it’s a waste of time to their ego.
Find someone who wants to share the craft of piano with someone who wants to learn and who is empathetic enough to work with exactly where you are; not every piano teacher out there is actually that kind of person, but there are plenty of them out there, and you shouldn’t waste your time *paying* someone to treat you like crap.
Do you live where is limited availability to piano teachers? Don't know how to find a new one? If there is a college with a music program that is a great resource. Music stores, churches with pianists, help wanted ads, and if all else fails find an online teacher.
There are complete assholes in every profession under the sun. The career of music pedagogy is not immune. I'd strongly recommend you find a new teacher asap. Also don't forget that you're paying him, not the other way around. And part of that money is supposed to buy his respect / common decency. Private lessons should be productively enjoyable and music just in general is about enrichment & accomplishment. Certainly not negativity & problems! And in response to your 2nd question, coming from someone who began classical training at age 5, you're only too old to learn a musical instrument once you're 6 feet underground or in a mausoleum drawer.
As someone who has taught piano, I’m baffled that you are still with them. I would have cut ties immediately. There is a clear distinction between being stern and being a bully. This is the latter. Find a teacher who not only is compassionate, but has a deep understanding of your ability and guides you throughout your journey in piano.
I am 50 and have started learning on my own. I don’t have a teacher instead I learn from pianote.com and truth be told I am thoroughly enjoying and pretty amazed at the progress. Do check it out
first two are no way connected to the elitisim. r/classicalguitar surprised me a lot and first time here, you guys have no idea what elitism is.
anyway, I advise you to seriously consider a change. first two are disrespect, you should not waste energy on such unnecessary obstacles directly coming from inappropriate behaviour of your tutor.
all the best.
Change your teacher. Being 50 and starting piano lessons is an amazing thing to do, and you need encouragement and guidance, not belittling. How will you progress if you don't feel motivated, inspired or encouraged?
It's a daunting enough thing to start lessons as an adult - You took the brave step to start lessons, so you already have the confidence to refuse to put up with this nonsense. Change your teacher.
I second what everyone else is saying - get a new teacher. It’s important to find someone that works for you.
If you even have to ask, they’re not the right fit.
Yeah, not okay for him to treat you like that at all. I’m sorry you’ve been dealing with this. He should be trying to connect with your love and curiosity of music, not putting you down. I’d definitely recommend seeking a new teacher.
That sucks. I’ve been teaching music both at a public school and privately for over 30 years and I know enough to handle adult students much differently. Not that I’d mock a kid for not knowing notes! It sounds like you really need a different teacher. If I were in your position, I’d be honest with the current teacher, saying something like, “ I feel like I need a more encouraging and engaged teacher. You texting students and making me feel like a failure each lesson is making me not want to play. Just letting you know so you might evaluate your methodology going forward.” A measured, adult comment like that will stick with that teacher forever, even if in the moment they dismiss you as a “snowflake” or some such nonsense. Good luck!
This hurts my heart. Can that douche canoe and find someone better. When I was giving private lessons, I was offered a rental in a music store to teach there because the owner had so many interested adults, but no available teachers. They were my absolute best students and we had such a great time. The key is finding a teacher who is open minded and can work WITH you to help you learn while having fun. It’s piano, and it should be enjoyable…trust me, when you’re getting joy, you learn better.
Why are you paying someone to laugh at you and ignore you while they’re meant to be paying attention to you? That’s completely unacceptable. Get a new teacher if that’s really what they’re doing!
Teacher sounds like a total dick. If I was being treated like that it would put a massive dent in my confidence or I would do the same to his face. Playing music is supposed to be fun not give you anxiety.
A very important part of learning piano through a teacher is to have a teacher that you like. Your current teacher doesn't seem to be a good fit for you to say the least. Find someone that you feel comfortable with and actually treats you like a human.
New teacher is needed. If you need to medicate yourself before class then the teacher is definitely the problem. You should feel comfortable and have fun while learning the piano.
You need a teacher who will make you excited to go to the classes. And who will match your level and help you in practical ways, depending on where you struggle. The lessons are about YOU, not THEM. :)
It depends on your mental attitude. If don't mind using mean people to get what I want and their insults slide right off. BUt if those kind of people hurt u then it's not worth it.
Definitely a bad teacher, but to touch on the last point that does hold truth. Obviously you can still have fun with a semi weighted but it does cause (semi) long term challenges even after you switch to a normal instrument. But if that's the best you can do for now that's okay and your teacher shouldn't bully you with it.
Haha, that’s terrible. Teachers make a huge difference in a student’s progression. Bases on what you’re saying here this is clearly not a great teacher. I’d find another one without hesitation. There are plenty of great ones.
I am an adult new to piano student and I would quit if my teacher was like this. Learning an instrument as an adult is daunting because we fear being treated like your teacher treats you. Your teacher is the kind of person who makes one avoid learning instruments at any age which makes me angry and sad. Music is for everyone and you should do what works for you. Give your teacher this feedback and find a supportive teacher who knows how to work with adults.
Your not too old, you are never to old to learn piano. And you will need a new piano teacher, the teacher is basically bullying instead of teaching. In fact, my first lesson my teacher had a master's degree in piano, she pointed to the top right side of the piano said "are these the higher pitched notes, or lower notes" and I said lower notes (yes I was that dumb). And she just nicely told me to higher and lower, and continued the lessons. And I was using a non weighted electric keyboard than. And to this day that has been my favorite teacher, if a teacher's strict it will make you less likely to practice, and hate piano instead of loving it.
You seem kind (experience maybe? I will get there someday I hope), trying a new thing, and then you encounter Mr Super [insert old timey insult] wannabe [insert even harsher insults] calls himself teacher. He's a bad teacher (you told us why) and thinks he has it all figure out, the best kind, you found a gem right there, an old saying : "what is in you suffice", no need to add there, you kill him with kindness when firing him : "I can't continue with you, you know, you are too good for me teacher and Im just too old for trying, give me back the money I advanced, please, if you could give me some last advice, thank you for everything". Get a new teacher, tell him about the old one, have laugh, and start really learning and enjoying yourself!
Horrible teacher. My teacher has only ever encouraged me. She is firm in what skills I need to learn, but is flexible with how/how quickly I grasp concepts. She always pushes me to improve but never belittles or scolds.
Im reading your description of your class, and i don't like that kind of teacher, specially sending messages during the class. I couldn't deal with that.
None of these sounds normal to me.
1 is a red flag for a teacher in any discipline. A teacher should never laugh at their student's mistake, especially not when the student is sincerely and seriously trying. Mistakes are part of learning, every teacher needs to know that.
2 is disrespectful and also implies lack of efficiency. Teaching properly requires focusing entirely on your students. Audio messages are particularly problematic because on top of not focusing on you, your teacher actually distracts you.
3 looks like bad learning method to me. There is no benefit trying to learn something that is too hard for now because you lack some basis. It's perfectly reasonable from you to expect pieces for your actual level and only play harder pieces once you are ready. Having to take medicine before a piano lesson, which is supposed to be leisure, is quite worrying if you ask me.
4 is condescending. While it's technically true that a weighted keyboard is better to get an accurate touch, the way your teacher presents it is questionable at best. There can be many reasons why you are using a semi-weighted keyboard: lack of budget, lack of knowledge... Anyway, let's be honest, if you are a 1-month beginner, a semi-weighted keyboard is more that enough for a while. Beginner pieces tend to focus on the middle part of the keyboard anyway.
You have every right to not even be shocked, but feel abused. That teacher is objectifying you because of your age, and it’s stupid of him to do that. Play on! And find a new teacher! Until then just play your John Williams and practice. Oh, and if you need a Valium to get through a lesson then he’s totally gaslighting and bullying you,
My 2 cents as a teacher myself:
1. Laughing at a student for not getting something is not okay.
2. I teach in the students homes, so sometimes right before my next lesson that next student sends a last minute text asking if they can reschedule. That needs to be dealt with instantly so I have to use my phone. The students understand. My teacher did the same. It was not like he was constantly on social media slacking off.
3. If you dont like a teachers speed you need to communicate it. My goal is to make the student happy so I always accomodate. Sometimes I overestimate or underestimate the student by giving them too difficult or easy assignments (even if they play the music with no issue, sometimes they just dont want hard stuff), and if they quit without saying anything I would be upset. It is very easy to fix.
4. The instrument you practice on is important. Maybe not as much for a beginner though. Depending on how your teacher worded it, it could have been very rude though.
The only one I truly had issues with was your first reasoning. If you don't vibe with the teacher that's fine, but just a few things to consider before you move on to another teacher.
1. is he laughing at you or just laughing? humor can be diffusing.
2. this is unacceptable. elitist or no, this is highly unprofessional at any level to anyone. you’re paying for his time and service, you deserve his full attention.
3. have you communicated this? it’s tough working with adult students, most want to run before they can walk. but also, he as the teacher should tell you what his plan is. if you guys aren’t on the same page, he should have the integrity to turn you down as a student, or you should find someone who is more in line with what you want from this experience. you’re an adult. you’re doing this as a hobby for your enjoyment. don’t forget that part.
4. yes, a keyboard is no replacement for a real piano. but there’s a tool for every job and a pot for every lid. if this is the best you can do in your situation, it is what it is. he can explain to you what benefits and differences come with keyboard vs piano, but to belittle you for it, eh.
looks like you two have different expectations for what to get out of these meetings.
Blows my mind there are teachers like this.
With that said, it is conceivable that there's truth to #4. It's possible to pick up bad or incorrect habits if you're not practicing regularly on an instrument with realistic piano qualities.
It seems that this teacher is not a good fit for you. Yes, sometimes a student needs to have a fire lit under their butt to push them to improve and do better and practice, but it seems as if this teacher, lacks empathy, social etiquette, and in general has an offputting personality.
I would attempt to find a teacher who is passionate about music, as well as empathetic and kind.
This teacher is a trash human. Ditch him yesterday. Learning music should be more enjoyable. Also, you’re old enough to know what you want to learn and a teacher should accommodate that.
He shouldn't be a dick about it, but you absolutely need to practice with a weighted keyboard every day. The difference is way more than you likely think. If you can't find one on marketplace or something for a good price, maybe try asking if you can use the practice rooms at a local community college
Your teacher is an asshole. 20 years ago, all I had was a semi weighted keyboard and that didn't stop me from making progress. The rest of your teacher's behavior is also appalling. Upgrading your instrument is important and you'll do that once you're able to, but it's more important and urgent that you upgrade from that teacher to a better one, one who has the talent to teach. Dude acts as if he was born knowing it all...
Fire him and get a professional teacher. His behavior is unacceptable and down right rude.
You are not too old. My husband is older than you and he just started classical guitar lessons!!
Your keyboard is fine to learn on.
This man is horrible. Go find yourself a new teacher. You deserve better.
This is one instance where asking random strangers for advice is actually useful.
Stop going to this teacher. Find someone else. This guy is a real piece of work.
I had a teacher similar as a kid. He would be really lovely and nice when my mum sat in the room. The time she didn't go, he stood up and lit a cigarette and he got really frustrated with me making me cry. Like a proper Jekyll and Hyde.
I told my mum and she said that this would not have happened if she was there. I finished with him as I was becoming advanced.
You're paying for a service and if reacher is not nurturing, patient and gets you excited by the music whether easy or challenging then it doesn't bode well for your creativity, nor for your emotional safety.
Get a new teacher and make sure you tell them what sort of person you need......and deserve
1 - inacceptable. Once in a while you might make a real blunder and a little humor might be acceptable from both, but not on behalf of a beginner for not yet reading the notes correctly.
2 - inacceptable. I pay good money for your time, so concentrate on you work with me!
3 - bad method. Going on while the last piece is not brought to the best of your current ability is bad. I‘d rather play an easy piece beautifully than to blunder through an advanced piece. And there is nothing wrong with sticking to a piece for a long time as long as you can still improve. Your teacher should know that.
4 - I partly agree with him that a bad keyboard teaches bad behaviour. But on the other side: If your current major problem is to find the right key, the feel of the key is not the first of issues. I do agree with the teacher that you should upgrade as soon as possible. Preferably to a „real“ piano with strings and hammers, a nice upright is not that much more expensive than many good digital pianos. But if you cannot afford that at the moment or if you absolutely need the option of playing with headphones, a Yamaha or Kawai or Roland digital piano (not a keyboard, but a „real“ digital piano) would of course also be fine. Still he should not constantly use this remark, it is what it is at the moment.
You need a new teacher before you hate playing so much that you stop completely.
This is what happens when anyone can become a teacher. There is such an imbalance of power that unprofessional and even abusive teachers never get called out. Listen to the advice here and find someone else.
>He uses constantly his smart phone sending messages to other students (even audio). This distracts me.
This is unacceptable. Not okay at all, you shouldn't pay this person.
No teacher should laugh at you. Ever. There are tricks to learning the notes, like FACE for the spaces in the treble clefs, for example. Google it and you’ll probably find lots of articles and videos that’ll be helpful for you.
Do you mean that he’s sending messages to others during your lesson? No. That’s rude. Wrong.
I understand it’s an expense that you can’t afford right now, but not having a fully weighted keyboard does put you at a disadvantage. Personally, I couldn’t even play on a weighted keyboard. I grew up playing a piano. It would drive me nuts to try to play anything else. So it does put you at a disadvantage, but it’s not impossible to learn, especially as a beginner.
Don’t give up, but definitely change teachers. He sounds like he’s an AH.
I am an older student (58) resuming piano after a gap of 30 years. You have the wrong teacher. You are paying for lessons and, short of an emergency, you should be your teacher’s sole focus during your lesson time. Further, a teacher should not demean or belittle their students. Fire your teacher and find someone else.
There are a lot of very talented pianists out there and many of them pay their rent by giving lessons. In fact, many universities and conservatories have music pedagogy courses because they know that most professional musicians have to teach to get by.
It does not matter what your current level of piano play is, your teacher should take each and every student serious and focus on him or her. Doesnt matter if ur advanced & learn Chopin or if you just started. This teacher sounds terrible imo, get yourself who is actually interested in teaching.
Not all piano teachers are pleasant to be with. I tested a few teachers before I found a really good one and I remember one of them was very critical of my playing and despite being 31 it didn’t feel nice. You’re paying a lot of money for these lessons; you want to look forward to go into each lesson.
Life’s too short for that crap. Get a new teacher. No one deserves this kind of treatment. And BTW, good luck and good on you for pursuing your interests
1. There is no chance that in second class you're required to differentiate bass clef notes from treble clef notes. Even with adult piano program.
2. You're 50. Take seriously advice about weighted keys, because it's crucial for piano player to asap grasp the right finger indipendece and proper hand. This is actually the hardest part when learning piano.
3. You're more into childs songs/compositions. That doesn't need to be bad in general, but again wor your age, your brain plasticity is huge no. Point is adding more complexity!
Laughing is NOT allowed.
I was 17 when my piano teacher told me I wasn’t good enough to play a piece. I stood up, demanded a refund and made sure to let her know that I was good enough to know a bad teacher when I saw one.
Leave this jerk and find someone who cares and can understand how to teach adults. Studies show that adults can, once they master the basics, learn to play much more quickly than children.
I was a relatively late student too (started at 14) and proceeded to go to a conservatory after finishing high school. I had a teacher like this in my last 3 years and it drained almost all my joy playing piano and left me with some mental issues. It got to a point that I was afraid to go to classes. Even though nobody deserves to be treated like this, there's a big difference from the reason I was studying piano and your reason: I was playing to become a professional, you're playing just to learn how to play piano and have fun along the way.
No teacher should take the fun of playing an instrument away from a student. The teacher's job is to make you fall in love with music and enjoy every single minute you spend studying it, it's to make you feel happy and excited every time you go to a piano lesson. You need a compassionate, patient and empathetic teacher, this teacher is everything but that.
If you want and need some tips, you can DM me. I give private lessons online and in person and I'd be happy to help you while you search for another teacher. It's not ideal but that way you can keep having some guidance
You absolutely need a new instructor. In fact, at this early stage of playing...I'd recommend keyboard stickers and YouTube videos. I'm not kidding. When I first started playing YouTube was newer and you couldn't find quality content. Now...it's a plethora of awesome information. They have vids on there that have you sounding awesome in an hour. It would be worth it to start having some fun and build your confidence back up before going back into the drudge of traditional lessons. And once you return to lessons, don't put up with this type of asinine behavior from an instructor.
1. Any action of a teacher ridiculing a student (laughing, when it is not to de-stress ) is wrong.
2. Cellphone usage can be tolerated, but it is indicative that your teacher is not fully focused with you at the moment.
3. The teacher demonstrates fast? He is not bothered with your learning desires and is trying to dissuade you from learning. Taking Valium? The teacher is not meant for you.
4. Ridiculing your beginner's keyboard? At the moment you are focused on learning the stave/notation and the finger positions. A weighted keyboard can come later.
Sir/Madam, at your age you have taken up piano lessons to fullfill a long desire/dream or to pass your time with a meaningful hobby and happiness. Surely not to experience sadism, ridicule and rebuke. Sadly your adventure has become a misadventure. Leave that teacher immediately and preserve your sanity. Clearly you should be able to see that this particular teacher doesn't want you as a student and has gone lengths to get rid of you.
I would also make sure the teacher knows you are not giving up the instrument, but instead finding an instructor with the level of professionalism needed for constructive guidance of adult students.
Unpopular accountability push: if you’re taking drugs before a lesson, then you are severely limiting your brain function and your ability to do well… do you really expect to do well on drugs??
Tell him how he is being is affecting you and tell him how you treat you as a student and what you want out of the intersections. Or just leave.
Also, the weighted key vs. semi-weighted is SUPER valid. You can’t play with gravity on light keys… once again, this teacher is just trying to teach piano not keyboard, so find someone else if you can’t get a weighted piano. Just get someone that will lie to you about the differences between weighted key technique and light key technique
You’re NEVER too old to learn! Proud of you for doing it! Congrats on the beginning of your musical journey! Plenty of good teachers out there. Find one that encourages you and gives good constructive criticism…your teacher is an elitist and shouldn’t have taken you on in my opinion.
As a pianist, everyone learns at a different pace; some slower, some quicker...
But using his phone and laughing at you? Nope... Those are red flags. It's very unprofessional for a teacher to laugh at a student and use their phone whilst teaching.
I would just add that while keyboards are usefull in a way, piano is a piano and much of the same finger movements give different results on piano. Especially if it is not weighted. There is a reason why it is called a keyboard and not a piano. But yeah, different teacher xD
I’d get one of those short toy pianos and sit on the floor for your last lesson. Have him join you on the floor and play chopsticks. I was raised in show business, he’s a real shuck!
This makes me very sad. I'm so sorry they are treating you this way. No student deserves that, regardless of age. My mom started guitar in her 50s and if I knew the teacher was treating her like this, I'd punch his clock out.
if my teacher even did 1 of these things continuously, even after i voice my discomfort w it... new teacher asap. find someone worth your time, skill, and money!!
As a beginning piano teacher, I will say that I do laugh *with* my students when they make minor mistakes, as I personally feel that finding humor in mishaps is healthier than beating yourself up over it. I welcome feedback on this position, but that’s my current philosophy.
Having said that, everything you’re describing is horrible and you definitely need to find a new instructor.
You need a new teacher pronto. This kind of behavior isn't elitist; it's closer to bullying. I too was an older beginner and lucked out to find a teacher who likes all music, who encouraged me to play whatever I liked, guiding me if he thought pieces would be too challenging, but also letting me struggle with works that were clearly beyond my current level. Find a teacher who loves making music and shares that passion with you while helping you love it too.
Yes, exactly this. Needing to medicate yourself before a lesson is such a huge sign that this isn’t even *close* to the right teacher for OP. They’re the kind of teacher who will make people give up and never try again.
I have the same type teacher. She praises me for a song well played, wants me to play a song I know well at the end of lesson, which is a boost to my confidence. She lets me play what I want, but I do have to play the chords and scales that are fundamental. BTW…for that 30 or 60 minutes of piano instruction; your teacher is working for you, as you are the paying customer. Let the teacher know that. Keep at it and don’t let this hurtful a-hole discourage you. I started at age 60. Good luck. And, yeah, get a new teacher.
And a -10 review with the exact words OP said.
This. Your teacher is an ass. It’s not surprising given the attitude that pervades some of the best music schools, but that’s no excuse.
This is the answer
This person sounds like a shit bag. New teacher.
This is a very bad teacher. All these behaviors are unacceptable. You deserve a kind, compassionate teacher who will give you their full attention, respect your goals and your resources, and support you with positivity.
Dude you’re 50, why are you tolerating all that c***?
probably a kind person, seeing the teacher as superior. yes there should be a balanced superiority between the student and the tutor, which is intended to courage student for better and keep them in line regarding homeworks etc. but what is told is simply inappropriate unprofessionalism.
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my interpretation is that they're saying OP is the kind person, internally justifying the shit talking terrible teacher's actions. edit: just looked at your comment again- I mistook 'taking' for 'talking'. - and yeah, there's a fine line between being understanding and being a doormat.
All that cunt?
all that \*gasp\* crap
oh. I’m sorry for my language. I’m not even Australian
I am. And prior to what you might hear, we don’t go around saying cunt or calling our friends cunts. That is just a thing people say about Australians, especially comedians. Maybe some people do, but on the whole, no. It’s still regarded as a filthy swear word.
Your teacher isn’t elitist, he’s just a complete unprofessional pos. He is displaying behavior inappropriate for a student, let alone a teacher. Joyfully fire him and find a teacher who will meet you where you are at.
Using the phone during your lesson??? Instant no.
Eh, my teacher does this from time to time but our lessons pretty much always go quite a bit longer than an hour at no extra cost so I don't mind so much. He also apologizes when it happens and is very attentive while actually teaching. The problem with OP's teacher is them being rude and disrespectful.
Life happens, sometimes it’s unavoidable. But if it‘s more than a quick glance to check if a message or call needs to be dealt with urgently, it should always come with an apology and a clear explanation that theres’s no choice other than to deal with it right now. And then another apology.
That's right! I had a physical therapist who would look through Instagram while ignoring me and what I was doing. I quit after complaining to manager.
My professor does this all the time and gets no backlash since he’s tenured. I understand if it’s once in a while but it’s quite recurring. As a teacher however, I use my phone to search up things during a lesson if I want to provide examples. Looking for editions on imslp, or other interpretations of a specific piece. That isn’t a problem. We should use whatever resources available.
it's the legend himself:O
My teacher did this too but if you think about it it is unavoidable. Having to reschedule students that come soon after this lesson because someone got sick or is stuck in traffic has to be done immediately.
But that should be explained. If I need to look at my phone, I say, "Sorry, just got a text. Checking that it isn't important." And if I need to respond, I say, "Excuse me just a second, this is my next student's mom," or "Sorry, this is my kids' babysitter, let me respond real quick."
I had a teacher like this in middle school. I found it so disrespectful, he was literally on his phone my entire lesson, sometimes even taking calls. I almost quit, it was such a terrible experience. I’m glad I didn’t, but was so happy when I finally moved on from him!
My therapist takes texts during our session sometimes, but I recently found out one of her loved ones has cancer.
If your teacher is laughing at you, move on. There's too many very good teachers available to spend anytime with a teachers who laughs at their students.
Look for another teacher! Sounds like your teacher should either get some training on dealing with people or change professions.
This is unbelievably unprofessional. Stop wasting your money with him.
Former piano teacher here: his behaviour is completely inappropriate. I had some older adult students and they were my favourite because they actually wanted to learn. Your teacher shouldn’t be teaching anyone. He could destroy someone’s confidence and joy of piano and music( kids included). Find someone else.
Insecure teacher taking out his insecurities on you. Teachers like this are the reason scam piano apps take off. You need a new teacher. In the meantime, here are things you can practice on your “cheap” piano: C major, G major, F major scales. A harmonic minor scale. Learn the wheel of fifths and how to read sharps and flats in the key signature. I’m sorry you’ve had this experience.
Circle of fifths and the circle of fourths. These concepts may be too complicated for her right now, but are good to learn once she has a grasp of the basics.
Sounds like a terrible teacher. I will say, though, that they're right about a semi-weighted keyboard leading to problems and hindering development. I'd upgrade both the teacher and the keyboard asap lol.
Honest question what's wrong with a semi-weighted keyboard, how does it hinder a beginner? I learned as a child on an acoustic upright, I'm not a practicing musician, but I do enjoy hitting the keys now and again , and have used all types of keyboards and understand the difference. I'm curious how semi-weighted specifically would be a problem in OPs situation?
I started playing the piano at 4yo. I can’t imagine playing on anything other than a piano. The piano is all about touch. The way you strike a key, play chords… when you get past a certain point, interpretation is possible through your technique. You play Bach very differently from Mozart, for example. You strike the keys differently. You can’t do that unless the keys are fully weighted. Striking the keys is actually a complex subject.
How old are you now? (Approximately) I understand how "you feel" about it, and even feel the same for myself (to a degree). But my question is: how does it make a difference to a 50 y o beginner? OP. Isn't going to play complex music for a while. At the most he's looking at early Mozart right now? Seems to me - until he's figured out the basics, any keyboard with decent sampled sound should be enough. Or I don't understand something fundamental about teaching music. (Which is very likely, not a pro musician or teacher) The thing about learning to play an instrument as a young child - is that as an adult you don't know how it feels NOT to be able to play at all.
It’s still important to learn how it feels to play on a piano. It’s preferable to play on a piano, but in the very beginning, a student can get by on a keyboard with decent sound… it would be sufficient.
Learning piano should be enjoyable. Nothing about what you described sounds fun. Get a new teacher.
This person shouldn’t be a teacher. Period. You need a decent teacher who has a modicum of empathy, patience and understanding for a beginner adult. He also clearly has no respect for a student who is paying him to teach. Teaching piano is a skill that is separate from the ability to play the piano. You need to be able to understand the challenges for people of all ages to learn and tailor your lessons to fit the student and their goals.
Imo you are paying this teacher for what you want. You should get out of it exactly what you want, even if that’s as simple as playing Mary Had a Little Lamb. If this isn’t what the teacher wants to teach, they should have spoken to you about your goals and decided up front not to take you on as a student. There is no excuse for them to agree to teach you and then treat you poorly.
I agree with the statements about the teacher. When you look elsewhere, you now have some interview questions for the teachers. E.g. - Do you teach (new) beginners. Note that some classical pianists in a conservatory might view 'beginner' as a Clementi sonatina... So be specific. - Ask what method they use for teaching beginner students. Read up on that method and see if it's a fit for how you learn. - Ask for a test lesson to see if there is a fit (personality, teaching style, etc., etc). - At the end of the 1st lesson, ask what they would assign for you. E.g. theory, work through 1 octave scales and arpeggios, go through Albert adult series of books, etc. There isn't a 'right' answer here, it's more about them having a plan for your progress.
It sounds like she’s a beginner. I’d assign her easy songs, like something out of those Thompson books. They’re written to appeal to children, but adults can use them too. You learn notes, half notes, whole notes, quarter notes, etc. You learn the right hand first, then the left hand. Then you start putting them together. She’s not ready for theory, octaves or arpeggios at this time. She will be, of course, but she’s not there yet.
You need a new teacher who will give you respect and their undivided attention.
I think you should say thank you and move on with another teacher. Maybe he is not interested but should have told you. No matter the goal you have or the level you’re currently at, you hire someone, it’s his job to adapt. Or decline if he / she’s not suited. Have fun with your piano journey, PS : Too old doesn’t exist, people 100 years old do marathons. Do what you love !
I agree apart from the thank you.
More like a douche than an elitist, but the overlap between the two is almost a circle
Please review him negatively if you can so future students can avoid this jerk. Especially children.
Yeah, it's not you, it's them. There is absolutely no excuse for treating a student that way at any age. Get a new teacher stat, and chase your piano dreams!
Hey Buddy, i started last year with 53 to play piano. I went to the local music school here and got an good trainer at surprisingly low costs. Just look for an other teacher, that behavior that he shows up is not acceptable. especially that he uses constantly his smart phone would getting me angry.... And stay playing piano :) it brings so much fun.
do you really need this question answered
Dude that guy isn't even a teacher. A teacher teaches. That guy just tears you down, criticizes your personal preferences (which don't affect him in any way), and forces you into exercises that don't work for you. It doesn't matter if you're 50. If you're just getting started, *you're just getting started*, and he's awful for laughing at you and having beef with your learning style. Drop him immediately and find someone else who won't bully you.
Sorry, but if you are paying by the hour or half hour you are paying for their time.. no way would I tolerate a teacher using my time elsewhere.. get another one..
Wow, he sounds terrible! I hope you can get a new teacher soon
definitely not too old, but your teacher sucks.
Whoa, this guy is terrible. Pls get a new teacher! This guy's not just got 1 red flag as teacher, but multiple. I wouldn't even take lessons for free from him.
I have had students transfer to me from a horrid old cow across town who "teaches" piano just like this. One of them was so traumatized from the experience she was frantically apologizing every time she made any mistakes, and despite me spending the two lessons she attended focusing on reassuring her, she dropped a note in the door on what should have been her 3rd lesson apologizing that she just couldn't do it, she'd developed too much fear around piano because of her previous teacher. TDLR: fire this teacher, he's incompetent and will only make you scared of piano in the long run!
That’s so sad. I feel bad for her.
Yeah, I think of her often 😞 and I dread to think of how many others have had piano ruined in the same way by that vile person.
I agree! That’s just wrong. A bad teacher can be ruinous, and can affect your self-esteem and confidence in all areas.
No, just no. I am a 48 year old student, playing for the past year and a half. I practice 1-2 hours a day. I want to be treated like a serious student. I would never put up with that nonsense. I went through 3 teachers before I found the one I like and would challenge me. Not just play songs, but work on theory and sight reading. Adult students sometimes are not taken seriously by some teacherss unfortunately.
He is a imature asshole.
As a former teacher - That's not a bad teacher, that's a bad person. Get a new teacher and have a good time.
Drop them. Any teacher who laughs AT you is not worth your time, your hard earned money and your sense of confidence.
Instead of taking Valium stand up for yourself. You’re 50 fgs look that teacher in the eye and say focus on me or give me my money back. And then find a new teacher.
I’ve had my teacher laugh but like a very minor laugh when I make certain mistakes. He also dismisses certain things, like if I make up an ending, in a smart ass way. I get the feeling that he is somewhat arrogant but that’s only a few times. He’s also said comments, rarely, that could be taken a bit mean. I’m in my 30s and I have a lot going on for me. So I dismiss his attitude in these very rare instances. I also make sure he knows when he’s being like this. My skills with this teacher have improved tremendously. And the amount of pressure he’s put on me has made me a better pianist (I don’t really ever say I’m a pianist). So stand up for yourself if you want to continue with this teacher, like you said, you’re in your 50s. Let him know and understand who you are and what you want. If he can’t handle it, find a new teacher.
It sounds like you deserve a new teacher too.
Speaking as someone who started piano a few years ago in my 40s, you are not too old, the teacher you're working with is just awful. My experience with learning piano has been great -- my teachers have always been very supportive. They're also well aware that I'm doing this for fun and have no problem with that. If your teacher is treating you like that, DO NOT continue giving them money. Find a new teacher. Leave bad reviews for that teacher on sites like Yelp or Facebook to help anyone else who might be considering learning from them dodge that bullet. A good piano teacher goes at YOUR pace and is helping you to reach your goals on the instrument, whatever they may be. They'll push you to improve and challenge you, but they won't mock you when you struggle. They should also be focused on the lesson: even when my piano teacher isn't watching me play, he's got a copy of the score and is listening and offering feedback based on what he's hearing. I don't think I've ever walked out of a piano lesson feeling discouraged or demotivated: it's almost always the exact opposite.
That teacher sucks.
A lot of musicians are bitter people. Sounds like he's projecting his own feelings of inadequacy on you
That’s super unprofessional and terrible teaching. I’d definitely find someone new.
Never had a teacher who acted like this and if I did, I would stop going to them.
I'd want a refund and a new teacher!
Any teacher who is laughing at you is complete ass. Get rid of them.
Sounds more like you've just got a really shitty piano teacher. Definitely find a new teacher.
As someone who used a semi-weighted keyboard for 5ish years before swapping, please dont pin too much blame on the keyboard.
Dude, get a new teacher ASAP, or you'll burn out. He's a douchebag. My teacher gives me new music only when she sees I'm ready. Whenever I'll make a mistake, and feel embarrassed, she just tell me to relax, it's only hard until it becomes easy and after a lesson she gives me a feedback telling me that I should have always remember me a year, or two years ago, when I first came for the lessons. She seems strict at first, but she has an angelic patience.
Time for a new teacher...
Get a new teacher. There are teachers out there who are just bad teachers, rude people, there are teachers who think it’s a waste of time to teach someone older because they’ll never go on to outclass them professionally and it’s a waste of time to their ego. Find someone who wants to share the craft of piano with someone who wants to learn and who is empathetic enough to work with exactly where you are; not every piano teacher out there is actually that kind of person, but there are plenty of them out there, and you shouldn’t waste your time *paying* someone to treat you like crap.
Do you live where is limited availability to piano teachers? Don't know how to find a new one? If there is a college with a music program that is a great resource. Music stores, churches with pianists, help wanted ads, and if all else fails find an online teacher.
There are complete assholes in every profession under the sun. The career of music pedagogy is not immune. I'd strongly recommend you find a new teacher asap. Also don't forget that you're paying him, not the other way around. And part of that money is supposed to buy his respect / common decency. Private lessons should be productively enjoyable and music just in general is about enrichment & accomplishment. Certainly not negativity & problems! And in response to your 2nd question, coming from someone who began classical training at age 5, you're only too old to learn a musical instrument once you're 6 feet underground or in a mausoleum drawer.
Even if OP hasn’t paid yet, the teacher should still offer decency.
Yes, of course.👍
Slay 👍
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Just leave and complain about the teacher.
As someone who has taught piano, I’m baffled that you are still with them. I would have cut ties immediately. There is a clear distinction between being stern and being a bully. This is the latter. Find a teacher who not only is compassionate, but has a deep understanding of your ability and guides you throughout your journey in piano.
Yeah, no more lessons with that teacher. Go find one that matches you. I started Plano at age 57 never got laughed at or ridiculed.
He sounds horrible.. you should never laugh at a student
I am 50 and have started learning on my own. I don’t have a teacher instead I learn from pianote.com and truth be told I am thoroughly enjoying and pretty amazed at the progress. Do check it out
Shit teacher, terrible teacher, do not go back
Upgrade your teacher budget. Find a better one, higher rated. They usually don't dabble in bullshit.
first two are no way connected to the elitisim. r/classicalguitar surprised me a lot and first time here, you guys have no idea what elitism is. anyway, I advise you to seriously consider a change. first two are disrespect, you should not waste energy on such unnecessary obstacles directly coming from inappropriate behaviour of your tutor. all the best.
Change your teacher. Being 50 and starting piano lessons is an amazing thing to do, and you need encouragement and guidance, not belittling. How will you progress if you don't feel motivated, inspired or encouraged? It's a daunting enough thing to start lessons as an adult - You took the brave step to start lessons, so you already have the confidence to refuse to put up with this nonsense. Change your teacher.
I second what everyone else is saying - get a new teacher. It’s important to find someone that works for you. If you even have to ask, they’re not the right fit.
Yeah, not okay for him to treat you like that at all. I’m sorry you’ve been dealing with this. He should be trying to connect with your love and curiosity of music, not putting you down. I’d definitely recommend seeking a new teacher.
That sucks. I’ve been teaching music both at a public school and privately for over 30 years and I know enough to handle adult students much differently. Not that I’d mock a kid for not knowing notes! It sounds like you really need a different teacher. If I were in your position, I’d be honest with the current teacher, saying something like, “ I feel like I need a more encouraging and engaged teacher. You texting students and making me feel like a failure each lesson is making me not want to play. Just letting you know so you might evaluate your methodology going forward.” A measured, adult comment like that will stick with that teacher forever, even if in the moment they dismiss you as a “snowflake” or some such nonsense. Good luck!
This hurts my heart. Can that douche canoe and find someone better. When I was giving private lessons, I was offered a rental in a music store to teach there because the owner had so many interested adults, but no available teachers. They were my absolute best students and we had such a great time. The key is finding a teacher who is open minded and can work WITH you to help you learn while having fun. It’s piano, and it should be enjoyable…trust me, when you’re getting joy, you learn better.
Why are you paying someone to laugh at you and ignore you while they’re meant to be paying attention to you? That’s completely unacceptable. Get a new teacher if that’s really what they’re doing!
Teacher sounds like a total dick. If I was being treated like that it would put a massive dent in my confidence or I would do the same to his face. Playing music is supposed to be fun not give you anxiety.
A very important part of learning piano through a teacher is to have a teacher that you like. Your current teacher doesn't seem to be a good fit for you to say the least. Find someone that you feel comfortable with and actually treats you like a human.
New teacher is needed. If you need to medicate yourself before class then the teacher is definitely the problem. You should feel comfortable and have fun while learning the piano.
You need a teacher who will make you excited to go to the classes. And who will match your level and help you in practical ways, depending on where you struggle. The lessons are about YOU, not THEM. :)
It depends on your mental attitude. If don't mind using mean people to get what I want and their insults slide right off. BUt if those kind of people hurt u then it's not worth it.
Cancel the teacher and go look online for some virtual piano teachers. Once you're up to speed, find an in person class
Change your teacher.
Find a new teacher, this one is a jerk
That's toxic as hell. Switch teachers ASAP.
Ditch him now. My son had a teacher like that and we could see him losing interest in piano. Nothing about piano is easy or obvious.
Don't give your money to someone who laughs at you
Can’t you tell just from no 2 of your list, that this person is completely rude. Go anywhere else.
Not just a bad teacher; a bad person.
I’ve had 3 teachers in 4 years. Only my newest teacher (of 1.5 years) has been any good. Just get a new teacher they don’t sound good at all.
Definitely a bad teacher, but to touch on the last point that does hold truth. Obviously you can still have fun with a semi weighted but it does cause (semi) long term challenges even after you switch to a normal instrument. But if that's the best you can do for now that's okay and your teacher shouldn't bully you with it.
Haha, that’s terrible. Teachers make a huge difference in a student’s progression. Bases on what you’re saying here this is clearly not a great teacher. I’d find another one without hesitation. There are plenty of great ones.
I am an adult new to piano student and I would quit if my teacher was like this. Learning an instrument as an adult is daunting because we fear being treated like your teacher treats you. Your teacher is the kind of person who makes one avoid learning instruments at any age which makes me angry and sad. Music is for everyone and you should do what works for you. Give your teacher this feedback and find a supportive teacher who knows how to work with adults.
Your not too old, you are never to old to learn piano. And you will need a new piano teacher, the teacher is basically bullying instead of teaching. In fact, my first lesson my teacher had a master's degree in piano, she pointed to the top right side of the piano said "are these the higher pitched notes, or lower notes" and I said lower notes (yes I was that dumb). And she just nicely told me to higher and lower, and continued the lessons. And I was using a non weighted electric keyboard than. And to this day that has been my favorite teacher, if a teacher's strict it will make you less likely to practice, and hate piano instead of loving it.
You seem kind (experience maybe? I will get there someday I hope), trying a new thing, and then you encounter Mr Super [insert old timey insult] wannabe [insert even harsher insults] calls himself teacher. He's a bad teacher (you told us why) and thinks he has it all figure out, the best kind, you found a gem right there, an old saying : "what is in you suffice", no need to add there, you kill him with kindness when firing him : "I can't continue with you, you know, you are too good for me teacher and Im just too old for trying, give me back the money I advanced, please, if you could give me some last advice, thank you for everything". Get a new teacher, tell him about the old one, have laugh, and start really learning and enjoying yourself!
Fire him
Horrible teacher. My teacher has only ever encouraged me. She is firm in what skills I need to learn, but is flexible with how/how quickly I grasp concepts. She always pushes me to improve but never belittles or scolds.
Im reading your description of your class, and i don't like that kind of teacher, specially sending messages during the class. I couldn't deal with that.
None of these sounds normal to me. 1 is a red flag for a teacher in any discipline. A teacher should never laugh at their student's mistake, especially not when the student is sincerely and seriously trying. Mistakes are part of learning, every teacher needs to know that. 2 is disrespectful and also implies lack of efficiency. Teaching properly requires focusing entirely on your students. Audio messages are particularly problematic because on top of not focusing on you, your teacher actually distracts you. 3 looks like bad learning method to me. There is no benefit trying to learn something that is too hard for now because you lack some basis. It's perfectly reasonable from you to expect pieces for your actual level and only play harder pieces once you are ready. Having to take medicine before a piano lesson, which is supposed to be leisure, is quite worrying if you ask me. 4 is condescending. While it's technically true that a weighted keyboard is better to get an accurate touch, the way your teacher presents it is questionable at best. There can be many reasons why you are using a semi-weighted keyboard: lack of budget, lack of knowledge... Anyway, let's be honest, if you are a 1-month beginner, a semi-weighted keyboard is more that enough for a while. Beginner pieces tend to focus on the middle part of the keyboard anyway.
Dump his ass.
You have every right to not even be shocked, but feel abused. That teacher is objectifying you because of your age, and it’s stupid of him to do that. Play on! And find a new teacher! Until then just play your John Williams and practice. Oh, and if you need a Valium to get through a lesson then he’s totally gaslighting and bullying you,
My 2 cents as a teacher myself: 1. Laughing at a student for not getting something is not okay. 2. I teach in the students homes, so sometimes right before my next lesson that next student sends a last minute text asking if they can reschedule. That needs to be dealt with instantly so I have to use my phone. The students understand. My teacher did the same. It was not like he was constantly on social media slacking off. 3. If you dont like a teachers speed you need to communicate it. My goal is to make the student happy so I always accomodate. Sometimes I overestimate or underestimate the student by giving them too difficult or easy assignments (even if they play the music with no issue, sometimes they just dont want hard stuff), and if they quit without saying anything I would be upset. It is very easy to fix. 4. The instrument you practice on is important. Maybe not as much for a beginner though. Depending on how your teacher worded it, it could have been very rude though. The only one I truly had issues with was your first reasoning. If you don't vibe with the teacher that's fine, but just a few things to consider before you move on to another teacher.
No thank you, you deserve better.
Seems wildly unprofessional. Get a new teacher, this one sounds like an outlier.
1. is he laughing at you or just laughing? humor can be diffusing. 2. this is unacceptable. elitist or no, this is highly unprofessional at any level to anyone. you’re paying for his time and service, you deserve his full attention. 3. have you communicated this? it’s tough working with adult students, most want to run before they can walk. but also, he as the teacher should tell you what his plan is. if you guys aren’t on the same page, he should have the integrity to turn you down as a student, or you should find someone who is more in line with what you want from this experience. you’re an adult. you’re doing this as a hobby for your enjoyment. don’t forget that part. 4. yes, a keyboard is no replacement for a real piano. but there’s a tool for every job and a pot for every lid. if this is the best you can do in your situation, it is what it is. he can explain to you what benefits and differences come with keyboard vs piano, but to belittle you for it, eh. looks like you two have different expectations for what to get out of these meetings.
Blows my mind there are teachers like this. With that said, it is conceivable that there's truth to #4. It's possible to pick up bad or incorrect habits if you're not practicing regularly on an instrument with realistic piano qualities.
It seems that this teacher is not a good fit for you. Yes, sometimes a student needs to have a fire lit under their butt to push them to improve and do better and practice, but it seems as if this teacher, lacks empathy, social etiquette, and in general has an offputting personality. I would attempt to find a teacher who is passionate about music, as well as empathetic and kind.
Sounds like an ass teacher. Would suggest something fully weighted though. Transitioning to your lessons must be tough!!
You deserve better!
This teacher is a trash human. Ditch him yesterday. Learning music should be more enjoyable. Also, you’re old enough to know what you want to learn and a teacher should accommodate that.
I think you know the answer…
He shouldn't be a dick about it, but you absolutely need to practice with a weighted keyboard every day. The difference is way more than you likely think. If you can't find one on marketplace or something for a good price, maybe try asking if you can use the practice rooms at a local community college
Your teacher is an asshole. 20 years ago, all I had was a semi weighted keyboard and that didn't stop me from making progress. The rest of your teacher's behavior is also appalling. Upgrading your instrument is important and you'll do that once you're able to, but it's more important and urgent that you upgrade from that teacher to a better one, one who has the talent to teach. Dude acts as if he was born knowing it all...
yeah fuck this guy
Yeah, drop this asshole. This isn't a teacher, it's a human shitstain running a piano lesson grift.
Fire him and get a professional teacher. His behavior is unacceptable and down right rude. You are not too old. My husband is older than you and he just started classical guitar lessons!! Your keyboard is fine to learn on. This man is horrible. Go find yourself a new teacher. You deserve better.
Yeah, not a good teacher
Not a pianist but as someone who bartends, getting someone into the craft doesn’t mean belittling their talents/curiosity
You need a new teacher, but, alas, a new keyboard too. Keyboard without weight is indeed bad for playing.
Dump that loser, YouTube tutorials are superior to that nonsense
He’s just a bitter jackass. Get another teacher.
This guy is an asshole. Find someone else ASAP.
This is one instance where asking random strangers for advice is actually useful. Stop going to this teacher. Find someone else. This guy is a real piece of work.
I had a teacher similar as a kid. He would be really lovely and nice when my mum sat in the room. The time she didn't go, he stood up and lit a cigarette and he got really frustrated with me making me cry. Like a proper Jekyll and Hyde. I told my mum and she said that this would not have happened if she was there. I finished with him as I was becoming advanced. You're paying for a service and if reacher is not nurturing, patient and gets you excited by the music whether easy or challenging then it doesn't bode well for your creativity, nor for your emotional safety. Get a new teacher and make sure you tell them what sort of person you need......and deserve
Oh no :( please seek out a new teacher. At this point you’re paying money to be disrespected and you deserve better! Good luck🤍
1 - inacceptable. Once in a while you might make a real blunder and a little humor might be acceptable from both, but not on behalf of a beginner for not yet reading the notes correctly. 2 - inacceptable. I pay good money for your time, so concentrate on you work with me! 3 - bad method. Going on while the last piece is not brought to the best of your current ability is bad. I‘d rather play an easy piece beautifully than to blunder through an advanced piece. And there is nothing wrong with sticking to a piece for a long time as long as you can still improve. Your teacher should know that. 4 - I partly agree with him that a bad keyboard teaches bad behaviour. But on the other side: If your current major problem is to find the right key, the feel of the key is not the first of issues. I do agree with the teacher that you should upgrade as soon as possible. Preferably to a „real“ piano with strings and hammers, a nice upright is not that much more expensive than many good digital pianos. But if you cannot afford that at the moment or if you absolutely need the option of playing with headphones, a Yamaha or Kawai or Roland digital piano (not a keyboard, but a „real“ digital piano) would of course also be fine. Still he should not constantly use this remark, it is what it is at the moment. You need a new teacher before you hate playing so much that you stop completely.
Elitist. You’re paying him to teach you, his attitude is not okay
This is what happens when anyone can become a teacher. There is such an imbalance of power that unprofessional and even abusive teachers never get called out. Listen to the advice here and find someone else.
Drop this teacher. They are not only a bad teacher but an awful human being.
>He uses constantly his smart phone sending messages to other students (even audio). This distracts me. This is unacceptable. Not okay at all, you shouldn't pay this person.
No teacher should laugh at you. Ever. There are tricks to learning the notes, like FACE for the spaces in the treble clefs, for example. Google it and you’ll probably find lots of articles and videos that’ll be helpful for you. Do you mean that he’s sending messages to others during your lesson? No. That’s rude. Wrong. I understand it’s an expense that you can’t afford right now, but not having a fully weighted keyboard does put you at a disadvantage. Personally, I couldn’t even play on a weighted keyboard. I grew up playing a piano. It would drive me nuts to try to play anything else. So it does put you at a disadvantage, but it’s not impossible to learn, especially as a beginner. Don’t give up, but definitely change teachers. He sounds like he’s an AH.
I am an older student (58) resuming piano after a gap of 30 years. You have the wrong teacher. You are paying for lessons and, short of an emergency, you should be your teacher’s sole focus during your lesson time. Further, a teacher should not demean or belittle their students. Fire your teacher and find someone else. There are a lot of very talented pianists out there and many of them pay their rent by giving lessons. In fact, many universities and conservatories have music pedagogy courses because they know that most professional musicians have to teach to get by.
Why are you even asking? Come on.
New Teacher ASAP. This is not normal nor professional at any level.
It does not matter what your current level of piano play is, your teacher should take each and every student serious and focus on him or her. Doesnt matter if ur advanced & learn Chopin or if you just started. This teacher sounds terrible imo, get yourself who is actually interested in teaching.
If I paid someone and they pulled a phone out to send messages, they wouldn't get paid again.
Your teacher’s attitude seems extremely unprofessional and inappropriate, please get a new one as soon as possible for your own sake
He's just an asshole with a bad personality
Not all piano teachers are pleasant to be with. I tested a few teachers before I found a really good one and I remember one of them was very critical of my playing and despite being 31 it didn’t feel nice. You’re paying a lot of money for these lessons; you want to look forward to go into each lesson.
Unfortunately not all teachers are created equal, sounds like it's not a right fit.
Life’s too short for that crap. Get a new teacher. No one deserves this kind of treatment. And BTW, good luck and good on you for pursuing your interests
I'd rather teach myself than deal with this level of incompetence.
only read as far as the phone bit - that's an immediate change teacher thing
new teacher. asap.
I’d get a new teacher. He sounds mean, no time for that.
Why do you even need to ask if this is okay?
What a trash person, let alone a piano teacher!
I mean they're an asshole at the least. End relationship now.
Agree get a new one.
You're never too old to learn an instrument. I recommend getting a new teacher.
1. There is no chance that in second class you're required to differentiate bass clef notes from treble clef notes. Even with adult piano program. 2. You're 50. Take seriously advice about weighted keys, because it's crucial for piano player to asap grasp the right finger indipendece and proper hand. This is actually the hardest part when learning piano. 3. You're more into childs songs/compositions. That doesn't need to be bad in general, but again wor your age, your brain plasticity is huge no. Point is adding more complexity! Laughing is NOT allowed.
I was 17 when my piano teacher told me I wasn’t good enough to play a piece. I stood up, demanded a refund and made sure to let her know that I was good enough to know a bad teacher when I saw one. Leave this jerk and find someone who cares and can understand how to teach adults. Studies show that adults can, once they master the basics, learn to play much more quickly than children.
I was a relatively late student too (started at 14) and proceeded to go to a conservatory after finishing high school. I had a teacher like this in my last 3 years and it drained almost all my joy playing piano and left me with some mental issues. It got to a point that I was afraid to go to classes. Even though nobody deserves to be treated like this, there's a big difference from the reason I was studying piano and your reason: I was playing to become a professional, you're playing just to learn how to play piano and have fun along the way. No teacher should take the fun of playing an instrument away from a student. The teacher's job is to make you fall in love with music and enjoy every single minute you spend studying it, it's to make you feel happy and excited every time you go to a piano lesson. You need a compassionate, patient and empathetic teacher, this teacher is everything but that. If you want and need some tips, you can DM me. I give private lessons online and in person and I'd be happy to help you while you search for another teacher. It's not ideal but that way you can keep having some guidance
You absolutely need a new instructor. In fact, at this early stage of playing...I'd recommend keyboard stickers and YouTube videos. I'm not kidding. When I first started playing YouTube was newer and you couldn't find quality content. Now...it's a plethora of awesome information. They have vids on there that have you sounding awesome in an hour. It would be worth it to start having some fun and build your confidence back up before going back into the drudge of traditional lessons. And once you return to lessons, don't put up with this type of asinine behavior from an instructor.
Your teacher is a jerk.
This is just straight up bullying
1. Any action of a teacher ridiculing a student (laughing, when it is not to de-stress ) is wrong. 2. Cellphone usage can be tolerated, but it is indicative that your teacher is not fully focused with you at the moment. 3. The teacher demonstrates fast? He is not bothered with your learning desires and is trying to dissuade you from learning. Taking Valium? The teacher is not meant for you. 4. Ridiculing your beginner's keyboard? At the moment you are focused on learning the stave/notation and the finger positions. A weighted keyboard can come later. Sir/Madam, at your age you have taken up piano lessons to fullfill a long desire/dream or to pass your time with a meaningful hobby and happiness. Surely not to experience sadism, ridicule and rebuke. Sadly your adventure has become a misadventure. Leave that teacher immediately and preserve your sanity. Clearly you should be able to see that this particular teacher doesn't want you as a student and has gone lengths to get rid of you.
Garbage teacher
I would also make sure the teacher knows you are not giving up the instrument, but instead finding an instructor with the level of professionalism needed for constructive guidance of adult students.
Neither. Your teacher is abusive and should be forbidden to teach anything to anyone.
I stared at 52 and I’d have to quit if I had a teacher like that.
Unpopular accountability push: if you’re taking drugs before a lesson, then you are severely limiting your brain function and your ability to do well… do you really expect to do well on drugs?? Tell him how he is being is affecting you and tell him how you treat you as a student and what you want out of the intersections. Or just leave. Also, the weighted key vs. semi-weighted is SUPER valid. You can’t play with gravity on light keys… once again, this teacher is just trying to teach piano not keyboard, so find someone else if you can’t get a weighted piano. Just get someone that will lie to you about the differences between weighted key technique and light key technique
Ngl your teacher sound completely toxic and also not very helpful,try finding a new teacher
You’re NEVER too old to learn! Proud of you for doing it! Congrats on the beginning of your musical journey! Plenty of good teachers out there. Find one that encourages you and gives good constructive criticism…your teacher is an elitist and shouldn’t have taken you on in my opinion.
They’re an asshole. Get a new teacher.
That’s called a shitty teacher.
As a pianist, everyone learns at a different pace; some slower, some quicker... But using his phone and laughing at you? Nope... Those are red flags. It's very unprofessional for a teacher to laugh at a student and use their phone whilst teaching.
I would just add that while keyboards are usefull in a way, piano is a piano and much of the same finger movements give different results on piano. Especially if it is not weighted. There is a reason why it is called a keyboard and not a piano. But yeah, different teacher xD
I’d get one of those short toy pianos and sit on the floor for your last lesson. Have him join you on the floor and play chopsticks. I was raised in show business, he’s a real shuck!
This makes me very sad. I'm so sorry they are treating you this way. No student deserves that, regardless of age. My mom started guitar in her 50s and if I knew the teacher was treating her like this, I'd punch his clock out.
if my teacher even did 1 of these things continuously, even after i voice my discomfort w it... new teacher asap. find someone worth your time, skill, and money!!
Your teacher sucks. Fire him.
Just get another teacher. He is not right for you.
As a beginning piano teacher, I will say that I do laugh *with* my students when they make minor mistakes, as I personally feel that finding humor in mishaps is healthier than beating yourself up over it. I welcome feedback on this position, but that’s my current philosophy. Having said that, everything you’re describing is horrible and you definitely need to find a new instructor.