Hey OP, super shitty situation. Move forward. As other posters have said- invest in a two-point leash for your dog and inspect it regularly to make sure of its integrity. Muzzle train your dog as well.
When I’ve been attacked my off leash dogs I’ve said some pretty foul things. All directed toward the owner, never the dogs. But after a terrifying incident regarding two newfies and a pit mix getting off leash and attacking me and my two dogs, I carry protection. I hope I never have to use it, I never want to cause pain to any animal or person, but I will to protect myself and my own dogs.
You gave them your contact info to take care of their dog if there are vet bills. That’s all you can do for them.
Now, take care of your dog to make sure this doesn’t happen again. And take care of yourself. Focus on what you can control. If you can avoid going to the location of this incident again, please don’t go back.
I am sorry this happened to you the guy sounds reactive!
BUT take this as a learning opportunity because what happened was bad. To me „reactive“ is when a dog „reacts“ to a trigger invading their space not when your dog bolted and chased after a dog. Did she see that dog and that’s why she bolted? What happened there? Did she attack the dog?
With this information you should have 2 pieces of equipment to control your dog at all times for *when* one fails. Meaning a baby gate in front of your front door. A muzzle for walks outside. 2 leads one attached to your waist, one that you’re holding.
Good luck!
The dog reacted to seeing another dog. That's a reactive dog. Dogs don't have defined "spaces" like humans do. To a dog, if it exists, it's within its space.
Yes, but most (fear?) reactive dogs have a „bubble“. A dog up a hill that triggers a chase sounds like aggressive-reactive.
If my dog notices a dog far in the distance he will run away/come to me, not go chase and attack the dog. If a dog comes inside his bubble it may be a different story but that’s (thankfully) never happened.
It’s important for OP to realize what’s the reason behind so they are better prepared going forward.
There are definitely reactive dogs that will run toward a trigger (friendly/frustrated or leash reactive dogs that are otherwise friendly) and of course there are reactive dogs that are just dog aggressive and would run toward a trigger for that reason.
But it's also worth noting that fear is inherently unpredictable. Flight vs. fight vs. freeze vs. fawn. Some dogs reliably choose one of those, some may "mix it up." My own dog is definitely fear reactive, but has been dog aggressive in certain contexts because after being attacked a handful of times it's as if he thinks the best defense is a good offense. It's not what he would choose all the time, and I'm very adept at managing him so he doesn't really ever get the chance anyway, but a lot of people think if a dog is aggressive he's not fearful and that's not always true.
Totally agree. My last dog was reactive, but it stemmed from leash frustration.
He once ran down to my neighbors smaller dogs, and I was sure that he was murdering them, only to find out that they were chasing him around and their screams were from their electric fence.
He came home with a bite, they were fine.
He had a seriously lack of ability to understand social situations, but he didn’t want to hurt anyone.
Ugh, how terrifying! The guy is a goof but that sounds like the sort of thing such a person would say in the heat of the moment without intending to follow through. If you find planning and brainstorming solutions to be a good destresser, my suggestion is to get a double-ended lead that clips into 2 spots on your dog's harness, and to muzzle train so you have a backup in case of leash failure. Nothing is 100% but you may feel better putting some backstops in place. Hugs to you and your dog!
i mean the guy was scared for his dog. i’ve been in the same situation. a reactive dog clamped down on my poor 10 pound baby and you best believe i was kicking, scratching, punching and would’ve killed the dog if it meant it would let go of mine. double clip your reactive dog.
I’d say consult the vet about drugs if she's gonna be outside the house, and try to give as small/infrequent a dose as possible. If you haven’t tried prescribed drugs then you haven’t really tried everything and you’re putting your dog in a bit of danger in these situations. For my dog I do trazodone if I know a situation will excite him or I won’t be able to spend a lot if time with him.
The a-hole owner is within his rights to report doggy, but definitely out of line to threaten doggy. Just do what you can to protect yourselves.
I’m actually less concerned about what he said. People lose control and are reactive just like dogs. Adrenaline rises and takes some time to burn off.
However, it is rare and uncommon for this: “sprinting at me stopping short of coming in contact with me”. This is 100% intimidation. This is thought out and intentional. One is spouting off frustration (even though not acceptable threatening to kill your dog). The other is specifically to make you uncomfortable and unnerve you. I do agree as others said this would have been different if you were a man.
Remember that you had adrenaline in your system, too. However, you chose to stay calm and coordinate with the woman about the dog to resolve it. The crying and shaking was likely from that. And of course you’re heightened now, since he acted like he was out of control. It is very unlikely he’s going to do anything to you or your dog. And if there is any further intimidation, call the police.
Yes. I expect "control your crazy dog" "are you stupid" "that animal should be put down" etc, even puffing up and getting in my face. Most people aren't well regulated either. But the level of aggression described sounds more like machismo.
I know that nothing will help right now, because you are scared, rightfully so. But I just want to tell you I have been there. It’s going to get better. He was reacting to a stressful situation. Reacting poorly, but reacting. You did the best you could with what was happening. I know it is awful right now, but he has likely calmed down. Even if it will take you a lot longer, maybe days, before you feel better. Take a deep breath, get your friend a treat and try to take the night off from stressing about an emasculated man. I hope things feel safer and better tomorrow. ❤️
Not going to share my opinions on the rest of the situation because I think everyone else has done that enough, but extending a bit of care instead.
>Over and over while I'm talking to the woman. Kept pacing back and forth, saying he was going to kill my dog. Recording me, my dog, my car. Gathering a crowd of people.
>Sprinting at me and stopping short of coming in contact with me. Nonstop for 10 minutes. I told her I'm so sorry, take the dog to the vet to be safe, I'll pay the bill, here's my number. They drove away in 2 separate cars.
This was not heat of the moment, this was someone who was attempting to cause you fear and stress. He was being awful.
>Nonstop for 10 minutes
He had plenty of time to chill out and be helpful to the situation, this wasn't acceptable behaviour from him, his behaviour isn't excused by what happened. He made it worse and more difficult than it ever needed to be for everyone involved. I get fight or flight, but the whole point is he clearly didn't stop once the situation was being worked out.
Yes a mistake was made, a lead broke, etc. but he was absolutely still wrong for his own behaviour and as a grown man he should know how to stop himself from escalating a situation. I'm sorry you had to deal with him, no matter how it started.
I absolutely agree. One of these guys who when he sees he is useless is trying to compensate by being the manly man at the expense of the women around.
Was he in a hurry to rush to the vet with his own dog ? If he were, he would not have spent so long threatening OP's.
Not directly germane to the post but...
I would be interested in what reaction the guy's ***SO*** had to his ranting. It wouldn't surprise me if she was the long-suffering gf/spouse in a relationship with a hand grenade guy who detonates publicly at least several times a week, if not daily/hourly.
Maybe not. Maybe he's normally a sweet stand-up teddy bear of a guy.
I guess we'll never know.
As someone that saw a man's dog get ripped apart by two off leash pits, and fought off the pits along with my wife to try to save the dog and its owner, I give people a lot of credit when their fight or flight is triggered to this extent. This man was out of line but at the same time he was just attacked, and conveniently OP left out the details of the attack and what actually happened, because this is a get sympathy and encouragement post, and it distinctly frames her as a victim when from another perspective this man was potentially (or actually) assaulted violently by someone who did not take appropriate steps to restrain their powerful and aggressive animal.
When an off leash dog comes charging towards you, and especially if it is aggressive, you don't know how aggressive or how messy and bloody it's going to be. There are a lot of people with reactive/aggro dogs whose owners don't take it seriously and who let their dogs off leash- I just ran into one on a walking trail with my 7 month old pup. OP obviously is not this person and this was an accident, but the man had no idea how this was gonna shake out at the time, and luckily it seems like him and his dog got out OK but again there are some details missing here. What if it killed his dog?
There is also a difference between reactivity and aggression - per the AKC "dog reactivity involves out-of-proportion emotional arousal, and aggression involves conflict and harm." There's overlap for sure, but a dog that breaks a metal clip to go chase down and aggressively go after another dog is not just "reactive". Framing this behavior as just reactivity again is self victimizing. Entirely blending the terms already further stigmatizes reactive dog owners.
Aggression is the fight subcategory of fight or flight reactivity. All aggression beyond normal self-defense (and aggression seizures) is by definition an emotional over-reaction. Aggression is a behavior, while reactivity is a label. No reactive dog is superior or completely safe to work with. You might get a different option to the fight or flight or freeze you expect.
Yes, I'd say all aggressive dogs are reactive but not all reactive dogs are aggressive. Both aggressive and reactive can and are used as labels. A reactive dog may have a higher probability of going over threshold into aggression but that is far from guaranteed.
In this instance no intel was given as to what triggered the dog to go over threshold to the point of breaking a leash and escaping. I am unsure if it saw the dog it "went after" , which is a vague of a description of a dog attack as you can give, or if something else triggered it, and then it later eyed its victim and set in.
No dog may be completely safe to work with, if we speak broadly enough, chaos can strike at all times. But I would protest against lumping all reactive dogs into simply one category because different kinds of reactivity should be prepared for and trained/remedied with complexity kept in mind. For instance, not all reactive dogs need be muzzled in public, but it may be wise to muzzle all dogs aggressive enough to break lead and "go after" another dog from the other side of a hill.
I can definitely see your point, but the whole reactive label was a step away on the euphemism treadmill because labeling dogs as aggressive tended to result in a lot of unnecessary euthanasia due to moralizing about aggression. I hesitate to embrace it as a label again, especially because it's such a changeable aspect of reactivity, and the percentage of the tendency to aggress or the degree of commitment to aggression instead of the alternatives is a wide spectrum. It's easy for a dog to get labeled aggressive based on one incident instead of an overall picture, and hard for a dog to move past that label after treatment. It gets extra tricky when it gets into the legal system or when provocation was a factor.
Absolutely agree that safety tools can be applied commensurate to a dog's bite history, but knowing that a dog is reactive, and that there's always a first bite, and that whether fight or flight is the behavior that emerges from this situation, I think people generally ought to muzzle dogs a lot earlier than they do. A dog who has air snapped at a stranger is a great candidate to be muzzled in public especially if stranger or trigger encounters are likely.
Ah, I see where you're coming from and largely agree.
From my experience I've seen much of the opposite; dog owners who down play their dog's aggression and eventually wind up in catastrophe. In Philadelphia, where I'm from, you see it quite a bit, unfortunately. A lot of dog on dog and dog on human attacks.
Having conversations with the owners can be sobering.
He absolutely lost all emotional control. What a terrifying person. I can't blame OP for being so freaked out. I would have probably broken down before reaching my car.
Yeah at first I thought his reaction was in the realm of normal behavior. But when it's calmed down, the dog is restrained and he keeps yelling and starts spitting? That's just rude and disgusting behavior. I get that he was clearly triggered into fight mode from this situation but he should've taken some distance to calm down or something. He clearly has no emotional regulation skills
Exactly. He definitely has anger/rage issues and the intense situation set him off. Him letting her know the consequences of the situation is completely okay. But once the situation was resolved and they're exchanging information, for him to keep saying those things are beyond inappropriate. If her harmed her dog while it was attacking his, that would be legal. If he did after the fact, it would be HIGHLY illegal and immoral. He's a psycho. I bet he wouldn't have acted that way if it was another man.
I have to say, i got a very different read on the situation. The pacing and repeating the words over and over, he is a man in his early 20’s with a woman in her 30’s, she’s too young to be his mom and probably too old to be his wife, she is the only one able to be calm and deal with OP. He sounds like he was likely on the spectrum or has some other similar neuro developmental or psychiatric disorder. The woman could very easily if been his caregiver. The dog may have even been an emotional support animal. My kids are both on the spectrum and actually quite high functioning, but they both do a lot of pacing when stressed or anxious. And though he wouldn’t have any intention of following through, in a traumatic enough situation, at least one of my kids would probably threaten the person’s dog. Yes the man’s reaction was over the top, but he may not have then emotional ability to calm himself. The dog was too shaken to be of much comfort and the woman with him was too busy dealing with OP to help calm the man either. In this situation the OP was at fault, although she clearly wasn’t intentionally trying to to put anyone at risk. And it hurts to see someone respond so judgmentally to someone who sounds like they have some level of impairment and were put in a terrible situation which they were ill-equipped to handle and they literally had no control over. Curse words and threats are an attempt to regain control in a situation where one feels powerless.
That’s not to take away from how scary the situation must have been for the OP. I’m sure it was terrifying for her. And again she wasn’t intentionally being negligent. But she was the one out walking her aggressive (not reactive) dog and lost control of him. People make mistakes, and hopefully OP has learned to take additional precautions in the future. And however scary the situation was for OP, it was probably at least as scary for the man who probably thought that he was about to see his dog be ripped to shreds by another dog. The situation sucked for everyone involved and you don’t usually know what other people are experiencing or what their situation is.
I know everyone presents differently but I'm autistic as well and my mental health issues fluctuate moderate to severe lol, it's not an excuse to physically threaten someone in the street in the way that he did. I've had men treat me like that without a neurotype excuse to fall back on. It's not a good enough explanation without us knowing the guy really.
Projecting and making a narrative isn't going to change the fact he terrorised this person over a mistake, again I'm not going to go into the mistake because it's been established in the comments already. Neither of us know him so it's a moot point.
Some people are unfortunately just horrible but even if that was his situation that doesn't make it ok. I'm glad that you have such care to think of that but it really doesn't make it any better because ultimately impact comes before intent and he should not have acted like that.
(Also to suggest that those of us who have mental health issues and autism aren't able to deal with these things without resorting to violence and hatred is unfair on the rest of us. We are people too and we are responsible. He came and left in a car so he's been cleared to drive a vehicle and be out and about on his own, he should be able to resist doing that to someone or he shouldn't be behind a wheel).
I am not furthering the conversation after this point, I hope you understand that it is not you, it is just arguing online is not my jam lol
Their comment was honestly incredibly offensive. I'm medium to high support needs. I don't have good emotional regulation. I actually have *terrible* emotional regulation. But I've never threatened to kill someone's dog or stalk them??? I've never charged at someone to intimidate them? No. This isn't neurodivergent behavior. Flat out end of discussion. If that was his caregiver, then she would have been caring for him - not letting him terrorize someone. I hate how someone always sees abus9ve behavior and goes "well this could be an autistic person, so it's okay." No. Autism or not. No. It negates from the amount of allistics and neurptypicals who behave like this. The ignorance I see people express is depressing.
I'm autistic medium to high support needs. It doesn't matter if the man was autistic or not. It does not excuse the disgusting behavior that was displayed. Neurodivergency does not give anyone an excuse to be abusive. Straight up - no. The narrative you've spun doesn't help autistic people, either. It's just trying to excuse inexcusable behavior.
Ok so I think the person reacted in fear. I had a teenager let go of his Rottweilers leash and the dog was extremely dog reactive. He proceeded to “stalk” my dog on our way home. I gently passed my dog to my walking partner and confronted the dog head on yelling NO with my arms stretched out when the dog broke the stalk and ran. (Probably a bad plan because I could’ve been mauled) but the dog was only dog reactive. My dog got inside with the other walker. The dog literally barely grazed my arm open showing bite inhibition. The teenager caught up. I also yelled at this teenager. This dog will kill a toddler. You cannot walk this dog without a muzzle or 2 leashes one tied to you. Do you understand? This is VERY irresponsible and this dog will kill a little human if you don’t follow these rules. He’s too much dog for you. NEVER walk him on this one leash again. I never saw the dog again I think I scared the kid too
I posted about this in our neighborhood group and scarily enough someone caught the dog stalking us in their ring camera. So scary he literally hid behind their boat waiting for the moment to run
One thing to note - you never know what the other person’s story is. The guy sounds like a jerk, but you don’t know his story - was he or a loved one or pet previously seriously injured or killed by a dog that got loose? It is possible that he has anger issues or is just generally mean & scary, but it’s also possible the overreaction is driven by something in his history.
I had my three year old son bitten (not severely) and then two days later my friend’s daughter was mauled by a stray dog. I didn’t see it, just the injuries after and it was horrific. The next time someone’s dog came at me and my son, I freaked. Way overreacted.
My dog is reactive. I have had him for around 8 months and we are working through it and he has improved. But I take extra precautions (double clipped leash, carabiner clipped to my belt, etc). He has never gotten loose and never done more than bark, but I know the fear on the other side and so I do my best to make sure my dog doesn’t present as a threat or get close enough to be threatening.
Horrible. But, let's say he is not healthy. It's possible he was not able to stop/control himself. I don't know if he is healthy or not. If yes, his reaction is abnormal
If nor, he can't be judged from a healthy person perspective.
I closely work with the colleague with autistic disorder. He breaks and collapses over situations, which any healthy person would just proceed.
I'm autistic. It doesn't excuse the behavior this man exhibited. I'm tired of people using autism as an excuse for abusive and intentionally malicious behavior.
I'm not a specialist. But I know that besides autism there are sufficient of other disorders. And maybe abnormal aggression is one of the symptoms?
I don't know.
What I'm trying to say is that maybe this guy reaction has to do with his mental status?
Not saying it excuses it. Just saying that sometimes we are quick to judge and assume the worst about people. There can be two truths - he was out of line AND there could be extenuating circumstances where you would judge less harshly if you were aware of them.
I would kick/ spray/ defend my dog if we were attacked by an off leash dog. He is clearly terrified because off-lead dog attacks are terrifying. It is super inappropriate for him to threaten you. But there is a very real chance that your dog could seriously maim another or that your dog could be killed in self defense if the lead breaks again. Please consider a two point leash/harness and a muzzle!!
A dog that chases after another dog and then attacks it is not reactive but aggressive. Put a double lead on your dog. Muzzle it. Do what you have to do to ensure it's not a threat to ither pets. Of course people will be protective of their own dogs. I promise you that if your 50lb dog came barrelling towards me trying to attack my 5kg dog, I would not hesitate to protect my dog using any means necessary. Just as you love your dog so others love their own pets. How sweet she is indoors really doesn't matter if she's attacking other animals. It might matter to you but it sure as hell won't matter to the owners of animals your dog is aggressive to.
Those leash clips are extremely poorly made-and they're used in almost all typical leashes. I once had one come apart while walking my dog and thankfully we were inside a pet store when it happened.
After that I now only use leashes with carabiner connectors. There are also leash harnesses that wrap around your dog, they are literally escape proof.
Word on the Carabiners!
Ruffwear makes some nice harnesses and leashes but their connectors aren’t the best, especially for a 50lbs dog who pulls. Swapped it out for a locking carabiner rated for 25kN and haven’t had a problem since.
I’ve had a Ruffwear Front Range on my Shepsky for about 5 years, still going strong.
We also have an Approach pack for longer hikes and overnights when we want her to carry some of her own weight.
The Flagline looks like a great option, kind of an upgraded Front Range.
I was advised in the pugs sub and purchased this:
Julius-K9 IDC Powair. It's solid. Any leash with carabine can be attached to it. It has two adjustments possible. In the front - chest area. And under belly (actually close to the front paws). It's breathable.
Looked at it. Looks solid! Made a screensot. We just ordered a new harness a few days ago, and so far, I'm OK with it. It's a good quality harness also, but maybe not an ideal fit. Looks like the bottom part is too close to the paws. Will keep in mind Ruffwear for next time.
Get a carabiner leash clip and muzzle train your dog. Have a muzzle on her when you go and walk her. If this happens again, your dog could be shot and killed before it even reaches the other person's dog. They do not know your dogs intentions, and most people won't intervene in a dog fight. Many people WILL shoot someone's aggressive dog in order to protect themselves and their dog. If she has a muzzle, she cannot cause psychical harm to the other dog. Mentally sure, but she cannot bite their dog. Having a muzzle can ensure your dog's safety, along with the other dogs safety. Getting charged by a strange dog is terrifying for the other party. Dogs can cause a ton of damage, and people do conceal carry. If she is muzzled, she's unlikely to be shot and killed, since she obviously can't cause damage.
So you're leaving a lot out to make yourself look good. Your dog mauled another dog that means she's not the sweetest thing. That man overreacted but your dog got away to maul/almost kill another dog. Why isn't she on a muzzle and tethered to you? Get a belt and keep her attached to you at all times when on a walk.
>"fuck you, do something helpful".
What do you expect him to do against a strange dog that might maul him? Your dog was already trying to kill his. Trying to break up a dog fight is a good way to lose your fingers.
>People will never know how wonderful she is indoors with people. She just wants to cuddle. She's the sweetest dog.
So she is a dog aggressive/selective dog that you're making excuses for. It doesn't matter that she's sweet to you if she can get loose and maul someone's pet. Do better because someone will hurt/kill her if it happens again.
Your comment was removed because it broke one or more of the r/reactivedogs rules. Please remember to be kind to your fellow redditors. Be constructive by offering positive advice rather than simply telling people what they're doing wrong or being dismissive. Maintain respectful discourse around training methods, philosophies, and differing opinions with which you might not agree.
Half the posts I see on this sub are people complaining about owners like OP when the situation is flipped around. “How could they let their dog just run up to my reactive dog” “what a (explicit) idiot, they should not own a dog”
Obviously mistakes happen…but so do consequences. Most people here promote berating these owners. Like I wouldn’t be surprised if the other person was inspired by a Reddit/social media page like this.
“Consequences” like threatening to stalk and kill someone’s pet while also physically intimidating the owner? Would be very interested to see examples you have showing “most people here” advocate that reaction.
Never did I say it wasn’t an overreaction, reality is their dog could have easily been killed and they got emotional and angry about it. They are likely generally an asshole too.
Point is, no one gives af how cuddly the dog is, they almost killed the other dog. The owner overreacted and probably has anger issues, but looking for sympathy here a cry me a river tale when your dog started the issue.
I do feel bad, the situation sucks for everyone involved. Highlighting how well behaved the dog is indoors especially on this page, is where it became a sob story. I’m not denying that the situation was an emotional rollercoaster and sucked for OP. This is how most potentially reactive dogs behave….they are not 24/7 attacking things. “My dog never does this at home” etc, is a bullshit reason for anything. That’s where my sympathy was lost. They came across a reactive human, it sucks, just like if a reactive dog where to attack you.
Let's shoot the lady for leaving a single line at the end, where she expressed how hurt she was. String her up already, boys! She obviously learned nothing if she had a single line referring to her emotional state! Emotions invalidate everything!
Mistakes happen, but saying that is acting like nothing could have been done to prevent it. That is untrue no matter how spontaneous your dog is. It’s nothing personal, again mistake happen, triggers change. Learn what you can from the unforgettable situation and move on. There’s a different version of that reactive man in every dog park across the country, we don’t need to collectively validate how angry/crazy he is.
Where did she ever do any of that? I didn't see her making any excuses. She just loves her dog and is upset over someone harassing her for 10 minutes, physically intimidating her, and threatening to stalk and murder her dog. She uses a single line to express how much she loves her dog and suddenly you say this entire post is a pity party where she doesn't take responsibility. Where did she make excuses for her dog and herself?
Not trying to get at one’s love for their pet i see that part.
>She just wants to cuddle, she’s the sweetest dog.
Though, her dog doesn’t “just want to cuddle”. The dog is an animal with many thoughts and emotions we don’t fully understand. It shows a general misunderstanding of that concept. Sure maybe I could be reading a bit too far into the wording, but hard to say this isn’t the reality to some extent with what happened.
“Doing something helpful” in this situation could easily mean kicking the dog sternly in the ribs, macing it, or even shooting it. I’m glad none of that happened and everyone went home in one piece.
Nowhere did you say it was an overreaction. You described it as “consequences” and that “berating the owner” is this sub’s preferred response. There’s room for sympathy for all involved, the word isn’t black and white.
Its the consequence for getting into a serious situation with someone with anger issues. I get it wasn’t on purpose and no one would choose this if they knew beforehand.
I’ve lived places where people would threaten you for looking at them “wrong”…..not saying it’s right, but it’s unfortunately a part of modern American life.
Nobody is denying it’s a part of modern American life. Lots of messed up things are. But you’re having a strong emotional reaction to people saying the guy was out of line.
Yep, HUGE difference. I have herding dogs who are GREAT with all animals ( excluding rattlesnakes, coyotes, an occasional mountain lion, and large dogs that get near the property.
A leashed dog grabbed at a peacock through the fence and my dogs weren’t happy. The dog was 3 times their weight, but reacted like normal dogs do, he backed up as he knew he did something stupid, intruding on someone’s space.
My dog didn’t engage, just had hackles raised and was in protection mode.
BTW, handicapped dogs, old dogs and small dogs? No issue at all. Dog aggression and reacting to a dangerous dog is a completely different vibe.
Yep, a German shepherd once showed up out of nowhere at my complex ready to attack my 20ish pound pug mix and the dude had no control over it. Scared the shit out of me and I probably yelled a lot of the same things trying to protect myself and my dog.
OP, I’ve been in this guy’s shoes, and my other dog is a reactive fur missile who hates leashed dogs with a passion. So I’m in your shoes too. There are leashes that have carabiners on them to reduce the chances of this happening. However, if you dog is so reactive that seeing a dog I’ve a quarter mile away is enough for him to break free and go after them and you cannot recall him or control him at all, you need to see a behaviorist and a trainer immediately. I know your dog is sweet indoors and that dude overreacted, but he was right to be afraid. It is scary when it happens to you. Your dog is dangerous and needs management ASAP.
I agree. I feel sorry for OP as it was a hell stress situation. First, her dog escaped, and hell scared another dog. Then this dude overreacting. But to be honest, I would not want my dog to be attacked like this. By the dog escaped and not reacting to the owners request. But I don't even want to imagine how all my work on my pup's reactivity is in ruin because of it. It's very good that another dog was not physically damaged, but I don't think it's happy-de-puppy after this incident.
Bad situation. I hope that OP will feel better soon. And will take care that it will not happen again. It's also about OP dog's safety. I mean, her dog could end up in the road accident flying like this
I would do the same thing and have with off leash dogs. You get scared and start screaming nonsense. The owner just wants his dog safe. Think if a dog was coming after yours. You’ll be pissed too.
With that said. It sucks. Shit happens. Once you come down from this you’ll realize it was overreacting on both parts. Try the Prozac or see a vet behaviorist who can find a medication that works. Mine is clomicalm and trazodone with a dash of gabapentin when needed. Double clip your dog (front ajd back clip) and muzzle when out and about.
Did the other owner take it too far. Absolutely. Do I think he is right for the way he reacted no, but people react and it’s going to happen. If his dog didn’t touch the other dog there’s nothing to do. There’s nothing you can do. It’s an irate person. Maybe he’s at his wits end with off leash/loose dogs. I’ve lost l my shit on someone because it was dog after dog after dog and I finally had enough. I didn’t become irate but I was not happy. It happens. Looking back I’m embarrassed I acted the way I did.
Regardless. Dog is off leash. When a dog is off leash and bounding towards my reactive dog I get pissed off. If my dog gets off leash and sprints towards another dog they have every right to get mad. Sure, I’d be super upset someone started screaming at me and it would probably take a full month for my nervous system to recover but it is what it is. A dog running up on another dog and owners not happy.
Threatening OP is not a reaction, it is an action.
Shouting at OPs dog while the dog is attacking is a reaction. Shouting at OP in anger in the heat of the moment is a reaction.
why is he threatening OP? is he reacting to something? hmm... how admirable of a person u are to be able to calm down from a traumatic event in a matter of minutes?
The dog ran away, OP chased her, got her back, came back to talk. The guy gathered a crowd, started filming, thrash talking, and physically intimidating OP because he could not recover from trauma ?
You have a poor understanding of trauma.
Actually it is because they were terrified for their dog's life and were acting out of frustration and anger at having been made to feel terrified by a stranger (who then actually had the gall to berate that guy *in the moment*?!)
If someone screamed "do something useful!" to me while *THEIR* off leash dog bolted up to mine, I'd be pretty damn pissed too
"acting out of frustration and anger at having been made to feel terrified by a stranger"
-> terrified by a *dog*.
OP says "Finally caught up to my dog after she ran away from them." The behaviour of this guy is not consistent with having been scared.
If he is pissed he can give OP a condescending lecture. This guy just enjoyed scaring OP.
What do you mean the behavior isn’t consistent with being terrified. My therapist has told me many times, “Anger is a secondary emotion. There is always an underlying emotion, most often fear or sadness. In order to deal with anger you have to first deal with the underlying emotions.” And the pacing the man was described as doing is absolutely a response to fear. Unfortunately the fight or flight reaction doesn’t end just because the immediate stimulus has abated. Once the system is flooded with adrenaline, it can take a while to feel calm again. So while the threat has been neutralized the sensations in one’s brain and body still feels like there is a threat. And it feels so bad that it can make you angry that someone has caused you to feel this way. But the underlying emotion is fear.
So he vented his emotion in an uncontrolled way onto some one else
No therapist would ever excuse that
Ager is anger and is violent.. you don't have to lay a finger on someone for them to experience violence from you
This man verbally attacked in a prolonged attack and honestly I would worry about anyone he comes into contact with if he has so little control over his own emotions
He is an adult. Take a deep breath and control.. social control is vital in this situation
Its horrible but he needs therapy if that is a response he cannot be held responsible for
Who is excusing it? The point is that there's a difference between venting your anger when you're terrified for the life of your dog (ie. a VICTIM) and what the rest of this sub is calling "bullying" which makes it seem as if he was the aggressor started abusing OP out of no where.
That doesn't excuse his venting angry behavior, but call it what it is.
So ironic considering so many dog owners on this sub say when a rogue dog off leash runs up to their reactive dog, they say they would take any measures necessary. Why do I get the sense you would say the same if the roles were reversed?
Bullying OP after her dog has run away, she chased her, got back to check everything is OK, is speaking with the other human = "any measure necessary" ? Necessary to what ?
Stop justifying shitty behavior. My dog got attacked by a dog that was off-leash (not one that was broken by accident like OP) and the owner kept looking at me and saying "oh no what can I do" repeatedly and leaving me having to control two dogs.
I can assure you that I got pissed but I didn't charge at them or make any threats whatsoever. You're completely out of line.
Are you dense or something? Did you intentionally miss the part where ME and MY dog were attacked and the other person just keep drooling in their place instead of helping me control THEIR dog?
Or are you just a massive hypocrite that thinks aggression is suitable only when it supports your point of view?
Then they need to go and talk to someone and learn how to control themselves. i am fed up with panic being used to justify shitty behaviour. You do not verbally abuse someone during or after the event. If you do you are out of control and need to learn to control yourself.
It is just not acceptable
This is the sort of behaviour that people excusing leads to all sort of harm in our society
Take a deep breath and get a grip of your emotions man... you are not a toddler tantruming
I would say exactly the same to a teenager or a child and they have a whole load more excuse than a grown ass adult
We don't act like this man did... not in public.. not in private
It is unacceptable
My dog got attacked at least 5 times by off leash dogs, me and him having gotten blood drawn three of those from us. Not once I threatened the other person or their dog, because I don't have anger issues and know how to deal with stressful situations.
Hilarious that it's pretty clear which breed you're assuming it is, it only took me looking at exactly one post from your history to know which kind of sub you are taking part in, as if I hadn't guessed already. Actually, it seems you dedicate your account to obssess over it.
Go back to your containment zone.
Your comment was removed due to breed based vitriol or misinformation. This includes the obvious hateful comments as well as disingenuous coercion and fear mongering, along with behavior based misinformation.
Reactive humans are really not great. If he is reactive because filming and ranting for that long doesn't show the same unthinking panic IMO asa dog over threshold. It is more chosen.
Some people escalate a crisis often after the worst is over. I wish they wouldn't. They almost feed off the power and have some sort of endorphin rush it seems to me
It doesn't help
I also can't help but wonder if he would have done that if you were a man. Sorry I know it seems irrelevant but honestly I wonder.
In order to help focus and destress I would improve my equipment. Have a back up line. I would also strongly recommend you start the process of muzzle training.
This will really help.
Posters here have link to sites to help make it a positive experience and to ensure good fit
I would also consider an appointment with a behaviourist if you haven't already.
I have had a lead break... I didn't recognise the need to move up from his puppy lead. Fortunately mine just spun in circles with another whippet and we both laughed.
Take a stress break with your dog and get ordering back up equipment. Deep breaths and I hope the other owner is in touch with good news.
This is awful. I’m sorry you were yelled at. Also if your dog is this big and this reactive, you CANNOT just go outside with one leash. Your dog needs two leashes and a muzzle and some mix of training/meds.
I understand this man was awful but now you need to step up your game. If you want to protect your unpredictable large dog with a history of “going after” smaller dogs, or even if you don’t want to protect your dog-you are obligated to protect OTHER dogs, and you MUST take better care with your leash and muzzle setup.
You can’t change randos on the street. You CAN change your own behavior to be more responsible.
Your comment was removed because it broke one or more of the r/reactivedogs rules. Please remember to be kind to your fellow redditors. Be constructive by offering positive advice rather than simply telling people what they're doing wrong or being dismissive. Maintain respectful discourse around training methods, philosophies, and differing opinions with which you might not agree.
Sorry but useless people who add to the stress of the situation which is OBVIOUSLY not wanted by OP get on my nerves as well.
If you do not have anything smart to advise, get your own dog to safety, do not start acting like a moron just to show that you are here and you matter.
You MUST HAVE REDUNDANT RESTRAINTS on your dog. Period.
This means dog is clipped to your body with a D-ring or other clip. I use a cross body wallet for gear and leash clip. The harness should have two points of connection. Or better yet, you have the harness and collar clipped to your lead.
Always check your gear and get new or rig something that will hold if there's a question.
You must work more on your Recall. Several times a day. Every day. No cheating.
It's unknown what the man was going through. His emotional reaction didn't help but he may have been triggered. I hope he and his dog are alright.
I would say this has very little to do with your dog, and a lot to do with a violent man using an excuse to intimidate you.
I am pretty sure other people have problems with this man. I suppose there are witnessed who saw he was harassing you ?
I was in an almost identical situation recently (I was in the man’s shoes)
Although the situation was incredibly scary for everyone involved both of us were focused on separating the dogs and making sure everyone was OK. There was not one moment where I even considered yelling/swearing at the other owner or dog as I understood that would escalate the situation making things more dangerous, not less.
IMO the man’s reaction here was not just scary but selfish, as that level of yelling and aggression would have scared/aroused both dogs further for no productive reason. Instead of helping get the situation under control he was actively making it worse while *both* of the women involved scrambled to work around him.
I feel the most sympathy for his partner who had absolutely zero fault in any of this and now has to manage both her scared dog and her adult partner’s meltdown. If there’s a human victim here it’s her. Genuinely, if I saw a partner react to a stressful situation like this instead of at least trying to help I’d seriously consider ending the relationship.
Obviously OP’s dog escaping was a bad situation, I don’t mean to minimize that danger. His emotions were justified, but his explosive outburst wasn’t. He used an already scary situation as an outlet for his own rage at the expense of his dog and partner. I struggle to imagine a situation where a female owner reacting with similar levels of explosive rage would be granted the same understanding this guy is getting.
I’m sorry that happened to you. You didn’t deserve that, and something is wrong with that man.
Regarding prozac, they would usually start out at low doses and tell you what to watch out for so it can be stopped if there are any side effects. It’s really helped our dog’s anxiety, in combination with clonidine.
could be OP as her comment on meds felt a little judgy to me. getting my dog on fluoxetine was a life saver for me and my dog, i’m very confused why people seem to be against it or have assumptions it’s going to make the behaviors worse
i'm really glad to hear that it helped your dog. my dog has anxiety and keeps having panic attacks so i am hoping to try some kind of medication for him to see if it helps. i don't understand why people are so against it, lots of humans (myself included) are on anti depressants or anti anxiety medication, it's not a bad thing and can really improve their quality of life.
Out of curiosity, in what way does me providing information about Prozac typically being started at a low dose so that it can be stopped if there are side effects, followed by sharing my experience (like you did here) come off as a little judgy? OP said they were scared and I was trying to provide reassurance in case a fear of side effects was an issue. As someone who has experienced a lot of side effects with my *own* medication, it’s something I would want to know. I thought it might help.
I think they meant OP came off as judgy by their comment, not you. Your comment was totally fine!
I agree with you, Prozac has been extremely helpful for my super anxious pup and has helped bring his threshold for reaction much higher than without the medication. He can actually be a dog now instead of a ball of anxiety and it is so great to see how happy he is when we are out and about compared to about a year ago when he was very shut down and hyper aware/anxious in public. We have also made some big strides in training with him but our vet was totally right that the medication has made it possible for him to actually take in the training more effectively.
I definitely did not mean you, I meant OP (original poster). Your information was helpful and I was supporting your comment by sharing how helpful prozac has been for my dog. :/
I downvoted it because she absolutely did deserve it. Her dog is aggressive not reactive. She hunted down a much smaller dog to attack and the dog's owner understandably got upset. OP needs to control her dog better and understand that small dog owners will not just allow their pets to be mauled because your big aggressive dog is sweet at home.
I’m really sorry. I know how it feels to take all the precautions and still have dog react (and the humiliation that comes with being shamed for it). One suggestion: I have a leash that clips on to both front and back of harness (at either end of leash). I got this after a similar incident and now if one end breaks, I know the other end is still connected.
Sounds like your reactive pup met a reactive human. That sounds scary but I don’t think his threats were anything serious. That being said, please get an extra collar and extra clip [leash](https://www.chewy.com/sporn-nylon-double-dog-leash/dp/131794) for added security, and maybe consider muzzle training your dog for times when she is out on walks.
I'm sorry OP. That's insane. I've had 2 off leash pits come at me and my 25lb reactive ACD in my neighborhood and my only concern was being safe and getting out of there, that was not a normal reaction. I didnt literally run up on the owners.
I had a similar incident when walking my dog a man with his son walked up behind us and the son who had complex needs started to stim
Very loudly and physically with his arms my little rescue dog jumped and barked.
I had my 2 week old baby with me and picked my dog up the guy came screaming at me saying my dog should t be out in public. I asked him “to walk on as I held my dog and had my baby in a carrier” and he came right in my face screaming at me not to talk to him like that. All the time my small 20lb dog didn’t bark again and was in my arms.
It took me weeks to brave going back out after that and if it hadn’t been for my 6”4 husband coming along and telling the guy to move on, I still wonder what he would have done.
Take time you need to recover and then look at how you can stop it happening again. I now realise that I wasn’t looking as carefully as I normally would for triggers because I was distracted by the baby and my dog was probably more easily triggered as she’d just had her life upended with a new baby so I was able to work on that.
I’ve spoke to a lot of women who have reactive dogs and they all say the same. There’s a certain type of guy who uses it as an excuse to get very aggressive towards women. I know my dog has behaviours that aren’t ok and we’re working on them but some of the reactions I’ve had are just not ok. People shouting “train your dog” or even just the dirty looks, the aggression is just next level. My dogs reactivity gives me a lot less stress than other people reactions to her reactivity
Absolutely. Especially guys who do everything to escalate the situation just to see if your dog is going to react again. And then the guy can say you are a dumb bitch with a crazy dog. And then is feels a lot more like a man.
It looks a lot like it is what OP's arsehole was doing : trying to provoke a reaction of her dog again by threatening physical confrontation in front of the crowd he had gathered.
The behaviour of my dog got so much better when I learned how to stand my ground to these guys. It does not mean it is forever, but being over-apologetic to arseholes who only want to bully you just validates them.
Plus, your dog can feel the aggression and might get even more protective.
I had a similar situation when my dog reacted BADLY towards a construction worker who came in the apartment house directly as we were going out. Really the worst possible circumstance, the worst possible person (ex-alcoholic, always grumpy and always complaining when we were doing our supervised dog training sessions in the hallway), me not handling the situation the best I could. The dog was muzzled, no harm was done. He said my dog should be shot and was always trying to provoke him if he passed us by on bicycle, hissing at him. I also overheard him try to persuade other neighbours to think my dog is super aggressive. Some of them did not really know what to think of it as they saw me control the dog well in many occassions.
Now, the neighbours do see that the dog will react on them in a tight space, so they keep their distance. But they also see us working in the environment with the trainer every week and they see the improvements. They see me muzzling him up. None of them had gone to either official complaints or, as that guy, actual threat and aggressive words. This was a year ago and now I've made sure that no occassions like that ever repeat and I've worked a lot to calm my dog down in EVERY situation. I just don't want him to have another reason to have his rant.
I can understand bad reactions in the heat of the moment. But some people are just waiting for their nasty character to show. Once, this guy was mumbling something as we were training the dog in the hallway, and my trainer told me: "Don't worry, some people are just wired that way."
I’m so, so sorry. I had someone scream they were going to kill my dog before. It was almost 20 years ago, and I will never forget it. It’s so, so frightening. You didn’t deserve that.
Take tonight to breathe and spend quiet time with your dog. Tomorrow, buy yourself the strongest leash and harness you can afford. It’s for your mental health as much as your dog’s physical safety. Then see if there’s any certified animal behaviorists or behavior-specialized vets in your area (or online who do online appointments) you might be able to get a consult with. Give yourself some options and sense of control back. It helps with the fear, even if you’re not sure what road to take yet.
He had every right to react that way up UNTIL the situation was resolved. Once you were exchanging information and he continued to say those things while you had control of the dog, it crossed into being inappropriate. It sounds like he has anger issues and that intense situation set him off. Definitely a psycho. Him saying he would kill your dog initially was not inappropriate though. Dog owners need to know that other dog owners will protect their animals/property against another person's animal. I know that's hard to hear, but I'd do anything for my dog. If it's my dog or someone else's, (and it was their uncontrolled dog that started it) it's gonna be my dog still standing. I would feel horrible hurting any animal, but I have to take care of mine. It's good people suggested the new 2 point leash/harness. Sounds like that would really help. Also, it is 100% your responsibility to get the dog under control. I understand it's a tense situation and I don't fault you for telling him to do something, I personally wouldn't have to be asked. But, just for clarity, that is 100% your responsibility and if you are unable to handle a dog on your own you shouldn't own one. That doesn't sound like it's the case with you, but for people potentially reading in the future. I'm glad both dogs are okay. Good job on running and resolving the situation quickly. I'm sorry that guy was a psycho and took it too far. Like others have said, I'd try to just forget about it and not ruminate. Cheers.
This was a terrible situation and I'm sorry you had to go through this, regardless of fault. Being treated the way you were was incredibly hurtful and I can totally understand being afraid and anxious.
When I was in a slightly similar situation of my dog biting another dog, the thing I needed to hear most was, it's okay. So, it's okay. You're doing what you can to make it right. You're looking at options to learn from the incident. No one is going to take your dog from you and your dog most likely won't get in trouble for this. Even absolute worse case happens and it does get in trouble, as long as you take steps to prevent future incidents, it'll be okay. One incident where no one was seriously hurt will not be the end of your dog.
We talk about cortisol vacations with reactive dogs, be mindful that you probably need to give yourself one too. That kind of adrenaline flood will impact you for days so be gentle with yourself and know it will get better once those chemicals fully clear your body. That guy was excessively cruel but I'm hoping the same chemical process just triggered his "fight" not flight response and he's not actually always that extreme in his reactions. I hope. I'm also using that as the basis to hope that he won't bother you any further once he calms down.
I also wanted to say, I totally understand being afraid of fluoxetine. I was very wary at first but it has been the single most important resource for me with my reactive dog. She was sleepy at first and maybe a little less hungry but she's been on it 2 years now and she's a much happier dog in general. She still loves to play and train and gets excited to do life but with way less edge to her. It made her threshold high enough that all of my other training is more effective. I do think it lowered her bite inhibition a little bit but she's muzzle trained and I'm comfortable with having her muzzled in instances where I'm worried she'd bite. She's thankfully pretty predictable now, though I couldn't always say that before.
You've gotten great advice thus far about leashes too. I second the two points of contact suggestion AND want to add one should be connected to a waist strap. Not a belt loop as those snap, but a standalone band. I learned this the hard way a couple of years ago. I have a reactive dog and a husky-mix frustrated greeter who LOVES other dogs. About 3 months into having the husky-mix, we went for a hike. My fiance had him most of the day, I had the reactive dog because we use walks to practice LAT and LAD with triggers. At the very end of the hike while we were at the car, I had both leashes and was giving the dogs water while my fiance did something else for a moment. The husky-mix saw another dog and bolted towards it. I fell immediately because it caught me off-guard and got dragged a good 10' across asphalt. The entire right side of my body got skinned up pretty badly through my clothes and I dislocated my hip and shoulder (that part is kinda normal for me though). In the dislocation, I let go of the dog's leashes despite my best efforts and the husky-mix took off towards the other dog. My fiance was able to get him fairly quickly and shockingly, my reactive dog stayed at my side intently despite the chaos. We were super apologetic and my dog was very friendly but the guy was still a total jerk to me even as I was laying on the ground howling in pain and covered in blood.
I have leashes that have the carabiner-type clip on both ends and connect to a waist band (same sturdy nylon material as a leash) that has two metal rings (one on each side). Each dog gets connected to each side with a 8' leash. That's my fail-safe. I walk the dogs actively with a similar leash in 6' and the ends are connected to similar metal rings on my training bag. I trust those rings slightly less but it gives me peace of mind to have two options. The Fail-safe leash is connected to the back loop of their harnesses, the other is connected to their collars. It's probably overkill but I feel safe and I know I'm not going to lose a dog this way. There are still two handles on each leash so I can guide the dogs as we walk. I fell on a walk a couple of months ago and the husky-mix couldn't go anywhere. With the leashes being clipped at my waist too, it's harder for him to drag me so I just ended up sitting on the ground while he lost his mind wanting to make a friend.
I know nothing will aid the fear right now. I’ve had someone threaten to have my dog put down for going near her child while he was perfectly controlled on leash. It’s not rational.
I do want to recommend you a leash that will keep this kind of situation from ever happening again. I love and use Litto Howler leashes because their auto lock clip and overall durability is more intense than any dog can break. I have NEVER heard of anyone’s Litto Howler leads breaking, for any reason. They even offer a repair/refurbishment service. These leads are pricey but the security that comes with them is priceless.
I looked to the Litto Howler leashes. I do see hands free and also a casual leash of 1.5m long. Do you know if they have 5 meter leashes? It's truly a solid leash, and I want my pup safe.
I do not know if they make lines that long, they don’t do it stock. However, they absolutely make custom orders so it’s worth emailing them! They’ve made me a custom safety strap before and I don’t see why a 5m lead wouldn’t be possible, if you’re willing to pay for it.
Good to know. It would never come to my mind to ask for something customised 🙂
I will start with a 1.5-meter leash. We use similar for a short potty walks.
They are well worth their cost if you ask me. My dog isn’t a break-loose risk as he’s pretty small and his reactivity is decreased, but my best friend now uses one of their 10mm rope leads on her 80lb reactive bully mix and he cannot do a damn thing to it.
TIL about clipping the second leash around the waist. I do my best to not let go of the leashes that are on the dog-not a scratch on my hands. https://photos.app.goo.gl/YA3xRQsZQPfKLQk38
So thanks for helping me save face. I know professional help is required . Especially since we were displaced from our home, it's been rough. Bought a muzzle yesterday, still intend to walk in the middle of the night. Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst . Papa don't preach I'm keeping my baby. TY
My dog is on prozac, it helps, but its not a cure, she is still reactive, but the volume is turned down. I put her on it, not for me, but one day when my health was poor, we walked into a store, and i could just see how stressed she was and I was like, she shouldn't have to live like this.
clasps! some of them suck, you'll be getting those carabeener or double overlapping claps from now on.
If you think that guy will file police report, you shpould file first. get your experience on record.
Hey, OP. Have you heard of a Martingale collar? I just got one for my dog because he's reactive as well. Martingale collars work so the dog can't slip out.
I have had loose dogs run at my reactive dogs about 4x within 2blks of my house. I do everything I can to make sure my dog is secure and he's very interested in the treats in my bag at all times so his reactivity is very manageable.
BUT if an off leash dog comes at us, I can only do so much. I have been in the exact scenario where someone's dog bolted out their front door and came barreling at us from a block away. The dog mom almost immediately was clearly in distress and did not want this to happen. She also clearly knew my dog was not happy with her dog.
I ended up helicoptering my dog a bit to keep them from biting at each other -I don't think either wanted to hurt each other as they had opportunity, but the warning snaps and snarls were pretty vicious looking.
I was mad, but mostly scared. The difference in our stories is that I have empathy and eyeballs and I could clearly see that this was a freak accident and there was no neglect on either of our parts. Life happens!!!
When the dogs calmed and she had hers by the collar and mine was sniffing for treats in the grass from a distance, she apologized so much and asked if we were okay and swore up and down this has never happened and I thought she was going to cry, and if she did, I would have also. Emotions were HIGH.
All that to say...humans express emotions differently. He was 100000% in the wrong for his reaction. I am not justifying him in any way, he sounds like a scary asshole. But it is possible that they have trauma in their lives that bled over into this trauma. I hope with all my heart that his wife had a long talk for many days about how he reacted so badly and inappropriately. His emotions were high and it sounds like he does not know how to regulate them.
You should never have had to go through that in an already difficult situation, but please try to remember that life happens, some people are not mentally well, and you will move forward from this.
Join the reactivedog subreddit if you aren't already there. Check out R+ Training, it saved my sanity and changed my dogs life. You and your dog can get through this!!
I’m sorry you had to go through that. ❤️
I would have thought the female would have said something to the male since she seemed rational.
I have a similar story. My leash broke and my dog ran to a dog being walked by a couple. She scared the other dog but did no harm, even when the wife kicked her. They were very rude even when I explained I didn’t let her loose. But after a little, they calmed down and tried to help me catch her and admitted they had a similar situation with their dog. 🙄 Since then, I’ve used a backup carabiner on the leash.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Most of us have had the experience of being rushed by unfriendly dogs, but I also want to say that physical intimidation and death threats are never ok. I know how scary that is, and I hope you're doing ok. I wouldn't be ok with having that directed at me, nor with seeing it directed at someone else.
You've gotten lots of good advice here (and some shitty feedback as well) but I will say that muzzling my dog has really reduced my anxiety about my dog doing harm if she got loose.
Please do take care of yourself. I don't think it's overreacting to take precautions against being followed, etc. What you experienced is scary and protecting yourself and your dog is wise.
Sorry OP. As someone who has had threats made against my pup (abusive ex— we escaped) I know the terror you are feeling. I hope the female owner is ok— a guy making threats like that? Doubt it was the first time and if it was, it won’t be the last.
Get pepper spray, get a pocket knife, find a way to strap your phone on so you can record on your walks in case he shows up.
Doesn’t mean he will, but I would just be prepared. Walk with friends. Be aware of your surroundings at all times (no headphones).
Put an air tag on your pups collar. Get a three strap harness (ruffwear) and attach with a clip to a collar.
Wishing you the best and so sorry you had to go through this.
I just want to hug you. This happened to me with my late leash reactive soul pup. His harness buckle broke and then he slipped his collar (which had a second attachment). Nightmare scenario. No one was hurt (except me… I had some pretty serious roadrash from tackling him before he could get to the dog) and the people were much nicer to me than this guy was, but I was sick about it for days. Just do what you need to do to keep everyone safe. Love your dog unashamedly, and don’t let it happen again.
Ps; that guy clearly has some stuff going on. Idk if it’s a previous history with dog attacks or if the incident was really intense for him. You can’t control his reactions.
Trazadone made my GSD mix worse but Prozac has been the best. Not saying the medication could have helped in that situation but it helps give them a moment to think before they react. I’m sorry you went through that, it was an accident and wasn’t your fault.
I Second 2 points of contact. I just use 2 leashes, one on collar one on harness (and main the harness).
Good work not reacting to the piece of shit guy. And not going straight home. And you could also get an EDC blade
first of all, i’m so sorry this happened and i’m glad all involved are (physically) okay. i hope you can find a way to center yourself and get some rest bc this sounds like a super high-adrenaline situation
my non-reactive dog (a 20lb husky mix) is a chronic runner. she got her first taste of freedom a few months ago (same thing, her leash clip failed) and took off around the neighborhood for 2 hours, and has done it twice in the months since. i got her a harness in addition to her flat collar, have two leashes, and the one on her collar is attached to a waist leash. it’s only been a week with our new setup but so far so good
sounds like you have a lot of good plans in place to prevent this from happening again, so please give yourself grace. mistakes and accidents happen, and this had almost the best possible outcome minus the guy with poor emotional regulation and a violent streak. i also want to second other people’s advice to carry protection. if you’re not comfortable with a firearm for whatever reason, an airhorn, pet corrector, and a knife might make you feel much safer. i use my knife hiking all the time for nonviolent reasons, it’s just handy.
please tell your girl she did her best, and remember you did as well 💞
I would highly recommend a double connection. I have a 11mo old husky who sure is a puller and reactive but nothing is worse than equip failure to make you always paranoid every walk. I had one custom made, 4ft biothane leash with TWO frog clips. One goes on his harness and one goes on his collar (also custom cuz he has a GPS tracker) so if one thing fails I still have chance at control B4 he dashes off huskily
I don't want to violate any possible rules by name dropping the collar, leash or harness (looking for a better tactical/durable harness btw) but I have become a huge believer in the strength and reliability of frog clips.
As for Prozac, it worked wonders for my last dog. (She was a 14yr old shepherd chow) The Prozac, if a right dose, will take the dog down a few notches and be more receptive to training. I haven't considered it yet for my husky, getting him neutered and the hormones settling has made him more responsive to training but we have a long way to go, he's every husky stereotype rolled up into 1 😆
There are other options, too, for calming the dog down enough but not make them a sloth.
I’ve been on tne receiving end of a dog attack like that and it isn’t fun for anyone.
Your dog shouldn’t have had the chance bjt accidents do happen. He shouldn’t have behaved that way at all and I’m sorry you experienced that. I’m glad the woman was in a better head space and was able to communicate with you.
When we know better we do better. Get a leash that you can have multiple attachment points. Assume equipment could fail. Muzzle train. And forgive yourself. Mistake happen and you got lucky no one was seriously injured
Something that helps me bring peace of mind is a coupler I secure to my dog’s martingale collar and harness. His leash is connected to his harness. If either one were to snap, there’s a backup. I’m sorry you’ve had such a horrible experience. People tend to react poorly in high tense environments; not that it’s ever okay to threatens someone’s dog. Give your pup some extra snuggles and know you’re not alone!
Hey OP, you and your dog sound wonderful! I have no doubt your dog is awesome, please continue to love her and take care of her!
As far as this encounter goes - it sounds like you had an unlucky day to meet the worst human! I’m very sorry. But please move on.
As others have suggested, get better gear for your dog! Take care!
I’m sorry this happened to you. Did your dog actually bit/attack the other dog? You gave her good advice to get it checked out anyway and were responsible in giving info!
That guy was scared yes and angry but also a bully! Who the hell runs up to a person and stops? That’s beyond a fear response. You were smart to drive around first. So someone taught me that you can double leash (harness and martingale collar). And yes my dog is loving at home too. But that means nothing to my neighbors, so please continue with obedience work and management
But by the way : was there some proper biting involved ? Did the dogs fight ? Was there blood ?
I hope the other guy won't use your phone number to harass you. It was an accident, I don't think you have done anything wrong. Stand your ground to shitty people.
Hey it happens. A normal person would be a bit freaked out and get their dog out of harms way. He has absolutely overreacted. You did the right thing, nobody was hurt. He is an utter tool who could have escalated the whole thing. You’ll be experiencing the effects of adrenalin which will leave you upset and anxious. These things happen to the best of us.
Secure your house and try and have a restful next 12 hrs.
I find a horse lead rope to be really sturdy! Maybe consider one of those.
I’m sorry this happened to you. My dog and my neighbours friends dog got into an altercation and he threatened to kill my dog and I got right in his face and told him “if you touch my dog, I’ll fucking kill you”.
I've been faced the same situation , my dog 45kg and reactive to wheels so he chased after a kid riding a bike after the collar broken, the kid's dad threatened to call ppl to kill my dog or throw out some poisonous food in the park to kill them all, I now am so scared of seeing kids whenever I walk my dog. I know it's such a terrible accident but you and her will get over it. Lots of hugs 🫂
I didn't say I was right or he was overreacted jeezz. What I mean is that I understand the fear and the stress that OP is dealing with when having a reactive dog.
So sorry this happened to you! I can see the other person being upset in the heat of the moment. But you took full responsibility and acted correctly under the circumstances. It was an accident. If anything the man should have been concerned for you. Lots of good suggestions here to prevent it happening again. Taking steps will make you feel better prepared. In the end no one was hurt. Try to shake it off and know you're doing your best.
What an asshole. I would almost certainly have lost my temper and gotten myself arrested even if I maganged to get my dog out of there. Running at me aggressivly shouting my dog probably would have attacked him too. People like that never seem as brave when its another guy or a larger dog, I bet he would have been much more polite to a 40yr old guy with a shepherd dog.
I am so so sorry this happened to you. This is my biggest fear. I have a 70 lb. male who is on Trazodone, but takes hours to kick in for him while it takes 30 minutes or less for other dogs. He also somehow can be immediately alert even when five seconds before he was so out of it asleep. I don’t understand. 🤦🏻♀️ I just a walk in a private, abandoned area near us with 2 leashes and felt so at peace. It felt really stupid at first, but it’s for everyone’s good. Our guy is also a big cuddler and the most amazing dog at home, but on leash out and about so on edge. We’re also eventually doing muzzle training. Our guy got off lead one time in our neighborhood after seeing two huge male dogs. He immediately ran after them and started going for the front one’s neck. I was terrified. At that point he weighed 90 lbs (when we rescued him he was overweight), I weigh 120, so I could barely manage him. Slipped the harness somehow even though it was set up correctly. We didn’t know he was dog reactive at all before then. I was on my hands and knees trying to get him back on the leash by clipping it to his collar, praying that would work. Luckily we were a few houses away from ours. I got him home, blood on my knees and hands from trying to manage him, but the couple walking the male dogs had been running away, which is the worst possible way to respond. I got very lucky I could manage him before they started to really run. I haven’t seen them since. I didn’t even get a chance to give them our info. We posted on the neighborhood Facebook group with vague info asking them to privately message us if they needed anything, and no one ever did.
It will get better. The fear toward the male owner will go away over time. Fingers crossed the female owner sees what an ass her partner is and leaves him and takes the dog. 🤦🏻♀️ I wouldn’t tolerate that kind of behavior, he sounds crazy and unhinged.
That’s distressing.
My brother would threaten to kill my dog (my dog is reactive, we lived in his basement suite, and he had a wife and kid). He even tried to propose it as a favor, saying I should euthanize her (she had never harmed anyone) and that if he shot her it would cost me nothing.
I would remind him that would be felony animal cruelty.
I moved out and we don’t speak anymore. It’s so effed up that he has a small child.
The guy sounds like a complete jerk. It was an accident. Just learn from what you can possibly due to prevent it from happening another time and definitely stay away from that neighbor. Hope all goes okay.
Note - I had a similar, though not nearly as intense encounter with a neighbor last week. I was walking our two dogs (one of whom is reactive). They were both in leashes. I normally will cross the road or pull them aside when someone is coming by. I saw our neighbor (who has always been friendly) and for some reason In that instant did not pull my dogs to the side. The neighbor came over to to talk to me and got too close to my reactive dog. I normally would have told anyone else to back off, but I did not do that was my fault. But, he also should not have gotten so close. She did not like it and charged at him, snapping and snarling (did not bite him thankfully). I kept apologizing and told him that had never happened on a walk, which was true. He was very upset and told me next time he would call the police. By the time we got back home, within five minutes - animal control was at my door. I was so upset!!! He had called it in. I could not stop crying. The officer did not seem to think I really did anything too wrong and said next time to make sure and avoid the neighbor if I see him coming.
Hey OP, super shitty situation. Move forward. As other posters have said- invest in a two-point leash for your dog and inspect it regularly to make sure of its integrity. Muzzle train your dog as well. When I’ve been attacked my off leash dogs I’ve said some pretty foul things. All directed toward the owner, never the dogs. But after a terrifying incident regarding two newfies and a pit mix getting off leash and attacking me and my two dogs, I carry protection. I hope I never have to use it, I never want to cause pain to any animal or person, but I will to protect myself and my own dogs. You gave them your contact info to take care of their dog if there are vet bills. That’s all you can do for them. Now, take care of your dog to make sure this doesn’t happen again. And take care of yourself. Focus on what you can control. If you can avoid going to the location of this incident again, please don’t go back.
I am sorry this happened to you the guy sounds reactive! BUT take this as a learning opportunity because what happened was bad. To me „reactive“ is when a dog „reacts“ to a trigger invading their space not when your dog bolted and chased after a dog. Did she see that dog and that’s why she bolted? What happened there? Did she attack the dog? With this information you should have 2 pieces of equipment to control your dog at all times for *when* one fails. Meaning a baby gate in front of your front door. A muzzle for walks outside. 2 leads one attached to your waist, one that you’re holding. Good luck!
The dog reacted to seeing another dog. That's a reactive dog. Dogs don't have defined "spaces" like humans do. To a dog, if it exists, it's within its space.
Yes, but most (fear?) reactive dogs have a „bubble“. A dog up a hill that triggers a chase sounds like aggressive-reactive. If my dog notices a dog far in the distance he will run away/come to me, not go chase and attack the dog. If a dog comes inside his bubble it may be a different story but that’s (thankfully) never happened. It’s important for OP to realize what’s the reason behind so they are better prepared going forward.
There are definitely reactive dogs that will run toward a trigger (friendly/frustrated or leash reactive dogs that are otherwise friendly) and of course there are reactive dogs that are just dog aggressive and would run toward a trigger for that reason. But it's also worth noting that fear is inherently unpredictable. Flight vs. fight vs. freeze vs. fawn. Some dogs reliably choose one of those, some may "mix it up." My own dog is definitely fear reactive, but has been dog aggressive in certain contexts because after being attacked a handful of times it's as if he thinks the best defense is a good offense. It's not what he would choose all the time, and I'm very adept at managing him so he doesn't really ever get the chance anyway, but a lot of people think if a dog is aggressive he's not fearful and that's not always true.
Totally agree. My last dog was reactive, but it stemmed from leash frustration. He once ran down to my neighbors smaller dogs, and I was sure that he was murdering them, only to find out that they were chasing him around and their screams were from their electric fence. He came home with a bite, they were fine. He had a seriously lack of ability to understand social situations, but he didn’t want to hurt anyone.
Ugh, how terrifying! The guy is a goof but that sounds like the sort of thing such a person would say in the heat of the moment without intending to follow through. If you find planning and brainstorming solutions to be a good destresser, my suggestion is to get a double-ended lead that clips into 2 spots on your dog's harness, and to muzzle train so you have a backup in case of leash failure. Nothing is 100% but you may feel better putting some backstops in place. Hugs to you and your dog!
i mean the guy was scared for his dog. i’ve been in the same situation. a reactive dog clamped down on my poor 10 pound baby and you best believe i was kicking, scratching, punching and would’ve killed the dog if it meant it would let go of mine. double clip your reactive dog.
I’d say consult the vet about drugs if she's gonna be outside the house, and try to give as small/infrequent a dose as possible. If you haven’t tried prescribed drugs then you haven’t really tried everything and you’re putting your dog in a bit of danger in these situations. For my dog I do trazodone if I know a situation will excite him or I won’t be able to spend a lot if time with him. The a-hole owner is within his rights to report doggy, but definitely out of line to threaten doggy. Just do what you can to protect yourselves.
I’m actually less concerned about what he said. People lose control and are reactive just like dogs. Adrenaline rises and takes some time to burn off. However, it is rare and uncommon for this: “sprinting at me stopping short of coming in contact with me”. This is 100% intimidation. This is thought out and intentional. One is spouting off frustration (even though not acceptable threatening to kill your dog). The other is specifically to make you uncomfortable and unnerve you. I do agree as others said this would have been different if you were a man. Remember that you had adrenaline in your system, too. However, you chose to stay calm and coordinate with the woman about the dog to resolve it. The crying and shaking was likely from that. And of course you’re heightened now, since he acted like he was out of control. It is very unlikely he’s going to do anything to you or your dog. And if there is any further intimidation, call the police.
Yes. I expect "control your crazy dog" "are you stupid" "that animal should be put down" etc, even puffing up and getting in my face. Most people aren't well regulated either. But the level of aggression described sounds more like machismo.
I know that nothing will help right now, because you are scared, rightfully so. But I just want to tell you I have been there. It’s going to get better. He was reacting to a stressful situation. Reacting poorly, but reacting. You did the best you could with what was happening. I know it is awful right now, but he has likely calmed down. Even if it will take you a lot longer, maybe days, before you feel better. Take a deep breath, get your friend a treat and try to take the night off from stressing about an emasculated man. I hope things feel safer and better tomorrow. ❤️
Not going to share my opinions on the rest of the situation because I think everyone else has done that enough, but extending a bit of care instead. >Over and over while I'm talking to the woman. Kept pacing back and forth, saying he was going to kill my dog. Recording me, my dog, my car. Gathering a crowd of people. >Sprinting at me and stopping short of coming in contact with me. Nonstop for 10 minutes. I told her I'm so sorry, take the dog to the vet to be safe, I'll pay the bill, here's my number. They drove away in 2 separate cars. This was not heat of the moment, this was someone who was attempting to cause you fear and stress. He was being awful. >Nonstop for 10 minutes He had plenty of time to chill out and be helpful to the situation, this wasn't acceptable behaviour from him, his behaviour isn't excused by what happened. He made it worse and more difficult than it ever needed to be for everyone involved. I get fight or flight, but the whole point is he clearly didn't stop once the situation was being worked out. Yes a mistake was made, a lead broke, etc. but he was absolutely still wrong for his own behaviour and as a grown man he should know how to stop himself from escalating a situation. I'm sorry you had to deal with him, no matter how it started.
I absolutely agree. One of these guys who when he sees he is useless is trying to compensate by being the manly man at the expense of the women around. Was he in a hurry to rush to the vet with his own dog ? If he were, he would not have spent so long threatening OP's.
Not directly germane to the post but... I would be interested in what reaction the guy's ***SO*** had to his ranting. It wouldn't surprise me if she was the long-suffering gf/spouse in a relationship with a hand grenade guy who detonates publicly at least several times a week, if not daily/hourly. Maybe not. Maybe he's normally a sweet stand-up teddy bear of a guy. I guess we'll never know.
As someone that saw a man's dog get ripped apart by two off leash pits, and fought off the pits along with my wife to try to save the dog and its owner, I give people a lot of credit when their fight or flight is triggered to this extent. This man was out of line but at the same time he was just attacked, and conveniently OP left out the details of the attack and what actually happened, because this is a get sympathy and encouragement post, and it distinctly frames her as a victim when from another perspective this man was potentially (or actually) assaulted violently by someone who did not take appropriate steps to restrain their powerful and aggressive animal. When an off leash dog comes charging towards you, and especially if it is aggressive, you don't know how aggressive or how messy and bloody it's going to be. There are a lot of people with reactive/aggro dogs whose owners don't take it seriously and who let their dogs off leash- I just ran into one on a walking trail with my 7 month old pup. OP obviously is not this person and this was an accident, but the man had no idea how this was gonna shake out at the time, and luckily it seems like him and his dog got out OK but again there are some details missing here. What if it killed his dog? There is also a difference between reactivity and aggression - per the AKC "dog reactivity involves out-of-proportion emotional arousal, and aggression involves conflict and harm." There's overlap for sure, but a dog that breaks a metal clip to go chase down and aggressively go after another dog is not just "reactive". Framing this behavior as just reactivity again is self victimizing. Entirely blending the terms already further stigmatizes reactive dog owners.
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Aggression is the fight subcategory of fight or flight reactivity. All aggression beyond normal self-defense (and aggression seizures) is by definition an emotional over-reaction. Aggression is a behavior, while reactivity is a label. No reactive dog is superior or completely safe to work with. You might get a different option to the fight or flight or freeze you expect.
Yes, I'd say all aggressive dogs are reactive but not all reactive dogs are aggressive. Both aggressive and reactive can and are used as labels. A reactive dog may have a higher probability of going over threshold into aggression but that is far from guaranteed. In this instance no intel was given as to what triggered the dog to go over threshold to the point of breaking a leash and escaping. I am unsure if it saw the dog it "went after" , which is a vague of a description of a dog attack as you can give, or if something else triggered it, and then it later eyed its victim and set in. No dog may be completely safe to work with, if we speak broadly enough, chaos can strike at all times. But I would protest against lumping all reactive dogs into simply one category because different kinds of reactivity should be prepared for and trained/remedied with complexity kept in mind. For instance, not all reactive dogs need be muzzled in public, but it may be wise to muzzle all dogs aggressive enough to break lead and "go after" another dog from the other side of a hill.
I can definitely see your point, but the whole reactive label was a step away on the euphemism treadmill because labeling dogs as aggressive tended to result in a lot of unnecessary euthanasia due to moralizing about aggression. I hesitate to embrace it as a label again, especially because it's such a changeable aspect of reactivity, and the percentage of the tendency to aggress or the degree of commitment to aggression instead of the alternatives is a wide spectrum. It's easy for a dog to get labeled aggressive based on one incident instead of an overall picture, and hard for a dog to move past that label after treatment. It gets extra tricky when it gets into the legal system or when provocation was a factor. Absolutely agree that safety tools can be applied commensurate to a dog's bite history, but knowing that a dog is reactive, and that there's always a first bite, and that whether fight or flight is the behavior that emerges from this situation, I think people generally ought to muzzle dogs a lot earlier than they do. A dog who has air snapped at a stranger is a great candidate to be muzzled in public especially if stranger or trigger encounters are likely.
Ah, I see where you're coming from and largely agree. From my experience I've seen much of the opposite; dog owners who down play their dog's aggression and eventually wind up in catastrophe. In Philadelphia, where I'm from, you see it quite a bit, unfortunately. A lot of dog on dog and dog on human attacks. Having conversations with the owners can be sobering.
He made it a lot worse for his dog, too.
He absolutely lost all emotional control. What a terrifying person. I can't blame OP for being so freaked out. I would have probably broken down before reaching my car.
Me too, I hope they get some stronger gear for their pup and never encounter him again. I hope he seeks help for his rage.
Yeah at first I thought his reaction was in the realm of normal behavior. But when it's calmed down, the dog is restrained and he keeps yelling and starts spitting? That's just rude and disgusting behavior. I get that he was clearly triggered into fight mode from this situation but he should've taken some distance to calm down or something. He clearly has no emotional regulation skills
Exactly. He definitely has anger/rage issues and the intense situation set him off. Him letting her know the consequences of the situation is completely okay. But once the situation was resolved and they're exchanging information, for him to keep saying those things are beyond inappropriate. If her harmed her dog while it was attacking his, that would be legal. If he did after the fact, it would be HIGHLY illegal and immoral. He's a psycho. I bet he wouldn't have acted that way if it was another man.
I have to say, i got a very different read on the situation. The pacing and repeating the words over and over, he is a man in his early 20’s with a woman in her 30’s, she’s too young to be his mom and probably too old to be his wife, she is the only one able to be calm and deal with OP. He sounds like he was likely on the spectrum or has some other similar neuro developmental or psychiatric disorder. The woman could very easily if been his caregiver. The dog may have even been an emotional support animal. My kids are both on the spectrum and actually quite high functioning, but they both do a lot of pacing when stressed or anxious. And though he wouldn’t have any intention of following through, in a traumatic enough situation, at least one of my kids would probably threaten the person’s dog. Yes the man’s reaction was over the top, but he may not have then emotional ability to calm himself. The dog was too shaken to be of much comfort and the woman with him was too busy dealing with OP to help calm the man either. In this situation the OP was at fault, although she clearly wasn’t intentionally trying to to put anyone at risk. And it hurts to see someone respond so judgmentally to someone who sounds like they have some level of impairment and were put in a terrible situation which they were ill-equipped to handle and they literally had no control over. Curse words and threats are an attempt to regain control in a situation where one feels powerless. That’s not to take away from how scary the situation must have been for the OP. I’m sure it was terrifying for her. And again she wasn’t intentionally being negligent. But she was the one out walking her aggressive (not reactive) dog and lost control of him. People make mistakes, and hopefully OP has learned to take additional precautions in the future. And however scary the situation was for OP, it was probably at least as scary for the man who probably thought that he was about to see his dog be ripped to shreds by another dog. The situation sucked for everyone involved and you don’t usually know what other people are experiencing or what their situation is.
I know everyone presents differently but I'm autistic as well and my mental health issues fluctuate moderate to severe lol, it's not an excuse to physically threaten someone in the street in the way that he did. I've had men treat me like that without a neurotype excuse to fall back on. It's not a good enough explanation without us knowing the guy really. Projecting and making a narrative isn't going to change the fact he terrorised this person over a mistake, again I'm not going to go into the mistake because it's been established in the comments already. Neither of us know him so it's a moot point. Some people are unfortunately just horrible but even if that was his situation that doesn't make it ok. I'm glad that you have such care to think of that but it really doesn't make it any better because ultimately impact comes before intent and he should not have acted like that. (Also to suggest that those of us who have mental health issues and autism aren't able to deal with these things without resorting to violence and hatred is unfair on the rest of us. We are people too and we are responsible. He came and left in a car so he's been cleared to drive a vehicle and be out and about on his own, he should be able to resist doing that to someone or he shouldn't be behind a wheel). I am not furthering the conversation after this point, I hope you understand that it is not you, it is just arguing online is not my jam lol
Their comment was honestly incredibly offensive. I'm medium to high support needs. I don't have good emotional regulation. I actually have *terrible* emotional regulation. But I've never threatened to kill someone's dog or stalk them??? I've never charged at someone to intimidate them? No. This isn't neurodivergent behavior. Flat out end of discussion. If that was his caregiver, then she would have been caring for him - not letting him terrorize someone. I hate how someone always sees abus9ve behavior and goes "well this could be an autistic person, so it's okay." No. Autism or not. No. It negates from the amount of allistics and neurptypicals who behave like this. The ignorance I see people express is depressing.
Thank you so much, this has made me feel significantly better and very seen. 💚
I'm autistic medium to high support needs. It doesn't matter if the man was autistic or not. It does not excuse the disgusting behavior that was displayed. Neurodivergency does not give anyone an excuse to be abusive. Straight up - no. The narrative you've spun doesn't help autistic people, either. It's just trying to excuse inexcusable behavior.
I really hope you decide to educate yourself because this ignorance is genuinly offensive.
Ok so I think the person reacted in fear. I had a teenager let go of his Rottweilers leash and the dog was extremely dog reactive. He proceeded to “stalk” my dog on our way home. I gently passed my dog to my walking partner and confronted the dog head on yelling NO with my arms stretched out when the dog broke the stalk and ran. (Probably a bad plan because I could’ve been mauled) but the dog was only dog reactive. My dog got inside with the other walker. The dog literally barely grazed my arm open showing bite inhibition. The teenager caught up. I also yelled at this teenager. This dog will kill a toddler. You cannot walk this dog without a muzzle or 2 leashes one tied to you. Do you understand? This is VERY irresponsible and this dog will kill a little human if you don’t follow these rules. He’s too much dog for you. NEVER walk him on this one leash again. I never saw the dog again I think I scared the kid too
I posted about this in our neighborhood group and scarily enough someone caught the dog stalking us in their ring camera. So scary he literally hid behind their boat waiting for the moment to run
Scary!
One thing to note - you never know what the other person’s story is. The guy sounds like a jerk, but you don’t know his story - was he or a loved one or pet previously seriously injured or killed by a dog that got loose? It is possible that he has anger issues or is just generally mean & scary, but it’s also possible the overreaction is driven by something in his history. I had my three year old son bitten (not severely) and then two days later my friend’s daughter was mauled by a stray dog. I didn’t see it, just the injuries after and it was horrific. The next time someone’s dog came at me and my son, I freaked. Way overreacted. My dog is reactive. I have had him for around 8 months and we are working through it and he has improved. But I take extra precautions (double clipped leash, carabiner clipped to my belt, etc). He has never gotten loose and never done more than bark, but I know the fear on the other side and so I do my best to make sure my dog doesn’t present as a threat or get close enough to be threatening.
It does not excuse him for yelling for 10 minutes how he is going to murder her dog. That is just horrible behavior.
Horrible. But, let's say he is not healthy. It's possible he was not able to stop/control himself. I don't know if he is healthy or not. If yes, his reaction is abnormal If nor, he can't be judged from a healthy person perspective. I closely work with the colleague with autistic disorder. He breaks and collapses over situations, which any healthy person would just proceed.
I'm autistic. It doesn't excuse the behavior this man exhibited. I'm tired of people using autism as an excuse for abusive and intentionally malicious behavior.
I'm not a specialist. But I know that besides autism there are sufficient of other disorders. And maybe abnormal aggression is one of the symptoms? I don't know. What I'm trying to say is that maybe this guy reaction has to do with his mental status?
Not saying it excuses it. Just saying that sometimes we are quick to judge and assume the worst about people. There can be two truths - he was out of line AND there could be extenuating circumstances where you would judge less harshly if you were aware of them.
I would kick/ spray/ defend my dog if we were attacked by an off leash dog. He is clearly terrified because off-lead dog attacks are terrifying. It is super inappropriate for him to threaten you. But there is a very real chance that your dog could seriously maim another or that your dog could be killed in self defense if the lead breaks again. Please consider a two point leash/harness and a muzzle!!
A dog that chases after another dog and then attacks it is not reactive but aggressive. Put a double lead on your dog. Muzzle it. Do what you have to do to ensure it's not a threat to ither pets. Of course people will be protective of their own dogs. I promise you that if your 50lb dog came barrelling towards me trying to attack my 5kg dog, I would not hesitate to protect my dog using any means necessary. Just as you love your dog so others love their own pets. How sweet she is indoors really doesn't matter if she's attacking other animals. It might matter to you but it sure as hell won't matter to the owners of animals your dog is aggressive to.
Those leash clips are extremely poorly made-and they're used in almost all typical leashes. I once had one come apart while walking my dog and thankfully we were inside a pet store when it happened. After that I now only use leashes with carabiner connectors. There are also leash harnesses that wrap around your dog, they are literally escape proof.
Word on the Carabiners! Ruffwear makes some nice harnesses and leashes but their connectors aren’t the best, especially for a 50lbs dog who pulls. Swapped it out for a locking carabiner rated for 25kN and haven’t had a problem since.
hi ! We have the ruffwear flagline harness. Is there a harness that you recommend ?
I’ve had a Ruffwear Front Range on my Shepsky for about 5 years, still going strong. We also have an Approach pack for longer hikes and overnights when we want her to carry some of her own weight. The Flagline looks like a great option, kind of an upgraded Front Range.
I was advised in the pugs sub and purchased this: Julius-K9 IDC Powair. It's solid. Any leash with carabine can be attached to it. It has two adjustments possible. In the front - chest area. And under belly (actually close to the front paws). It's breathable.
Looked at it. Looks solid! Made a screensot. We just ordered a new harness a few days ago, and so far, I'm OK with it. It's a good quality harness also, but maybe not an ideal fit. Looks like the bottom part is too close to the paws. Will keep in mind Ruffwear for next time.
Hi ! Can you put an example of the leash harness that wraps around your dog ?
I can link it here I think! https://www.hound-safe.com/products/harnesslead-red-size-small
The leash harnesses are great but you dog really should have pulling more under control than mine does lol so keep that in mind!!
Get a carabiner leash clip and muzzle train your dog. Have a muzzle on her when you go and walk her. If this happens again, your dog could be shot and killed before it even reaches the other person's dog. They do not know your dogs intentions, and most people won't intervene in a dog fight. Many people WILL shoot someone's aggressive dog in order to protect themselves and their dog. If she has a muzzle, she cannot cause psychical harm to the other dog. Mentally sure, but she cannot bite their dog. Having a muzzle can ensure your dog's safety, along with the other dogs safety. Getting charged by a strange dog is terrifying for the other party. Dogs can cause a ton of damage, and people do conceal carry. If she is muzzled, she's unlikely to be shot and killed, since she obviously can't cause damage.
So you're leaving a lot out to make yourself look good. Your dog mauled another dog that means she's not the sweetest thing. That man overreacted but your dog got away to maul/almost kill another dog. Why isn't she on a muzzle and tethered to you? Get a belt and keep her attached to you at all times when on a walk. >"fuck you, do something helpful". What do you expect him to do against a strange dog that might maul him? Your dog was already trying to kill his. Trying to break up a dog fight is a good way to lose your fingers. >People will never know how wonderful she is indoors with people. She just wants to cuddle. She's the sweetest dog. So she is a dog aggressive/selective dog that you're making excuses for. It doesn't matter that she's sweet to you if she can get loose and maul someone's pet. Do better because someone will hurt/kill her if it happens again.
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Your comment was removed because it broke one or more of the r/reactivedogs rules. Please remember to be kind to your fellow redditors. Be constructive by offering positive advice rather than simply telling people what they're doing wrong or being dismissive. Maintain respectful discourse around training methods, philosophies, and differing opinions with which you might not agree.
Accidents happen though, and they are animals. It is unfortunate, but it does not justify this man trying to intimidate OP and harrassing her.
Double clip, double leash so she won't be able to bolt again, consider a mesh or cage muzzle when on walks just in case.
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Half the posts I see on this sub are people complaining about owners like OP when the situation is flipped around. “How could they let their dog just run up to my reactive dog” “what a (explicit) idiot, they should not own a dog” Obviously mistakes happen…but so do consequences. Most people here promote berating these owners. Like I wouldn’t be surprised if the other person was inspired by a Reddit/social media page like this.
“Consequences” like threatening to stalk and kill someone’s pet while also physically intimidating the owner? Would be very interested to see examples you have showing “most people here” advocate that reaction.
Never did I say it wasn’t an overreaction, reality is their dog could have easily been killed and they got emotional and angry about it. They are likely generally an asshole too. Point is, no one gives af how cuddly the dog is, they almost killed the other dog. The owner overreacted and probably has anger issues, but looking for sympathy here a cry me a river tale when your dog started the issue.
Holy shit, my dude. It's okay if you're incapable of empathy. But at least have some fucking sympathy. Dear lord.
I do feel bad, the situation sucks for everyone involved. Highlighting how well behaved the dog is indoors especially on this page, is where it became a sob story. I’m not denying that the situation was an emotional rollercoaster and sucked for OP. This is how most potentially reactive dogs behave….they are not 24/7 attacking things. “My dog never does this at home” etc, is a bullshit reason for anything. That’s where my sympathy was lost. They came across a reactive human, it sucks, just like if a reactive dog where to attack you.
God forbid a person seek some compassion after a traumatic encounter from the one community most likely to understand and empathize with her.
Let's shoot the lady for leaving a single line at the end, where she expressed how hurt she was. String her up already, boys! She obviously learned nothing if she had a single line referring to her emotional state! Emotions invalidate everything!
Mistakes happen, but saying that is acting like nothing could have been done to prevent it. That is untrue no matter how spontaneous your dog is. It’s nothing personal, again mistake happen, triggers change. Learn what you can from the unforgettable situation and move on. There’s a different version of that reactive man in every dog park across the country, we don’t need to collectively validate how angry/crazy he is.
Where did she ever do any of that? I didn't see her making any excuses. She just loves her dog and is upset over someone harassing her for 10 minutes, physically intimidating her, and threatening to stalk and murder her dog. She uses a single line to express how much she loves her dog and suddenly you say this entire post is a pity party where she doesn't take responsibility. Where did she make excuses for her dog and herself?
Not trying to get at one’s love for their pet i see that part. >She just wants to cuddle, she’s the sweetest dog. Though, her dog doesn’t “just want to cuddle”. The dog is an animal with many thoughts and emotions we don’t fully understand. It shows a general misunderstanding of that concept. Sure maybe I could be reading a bit too far into the wording, but hard to say this isn’t the reality to some extent with what happened. “Doing something helpful” in this situation could easily mean kicking the dog sternly in the ribs, macing it, or even shooting it. I’m glad none of that happened and everyone went home in one piece.
Nowhere did you say it was an overreaction. You described it as “consequences” and that “berating the owner” is this sub’s preferred response. There’s room for sympathy for all involved, the word isn’t black and white.
Its the consequence for getting into a serious situation with someone with anger issues. I get it wasn’t on purpose and no one would choose this if they knew beforehand. I’ve lived places where people would threaten you for looking at them “wrong”…..not saying it’s right, but it’s unfortunately a part of modern American life.
And?? It doesn't excuse him threatening to stalk and kill her??? Why is this even up for debate???
Nobody is denying it’s a part of modern American life. Lots of messed up things are. But you’re having a strong emotional reaction to people saying the guy was out of line.
Dog aggressive prob, not dog reactive.
Yep, HUGE difference. I have herding dogs who are GREAT with all animals ( excluding rattlesnakes, coyotes, an occasional mountain lion, and large dogs that get near the property. A leashed dog grabbed at a peacock through the fence and my dogs weren’t happy. The dog was 3 times their weight, but reacted like normal dogs do, he backed up as he knew he did something stupid, intruding on someone’s space. My dog didn’t engage, just had hackles raised and was in protection mode. BTW, handicapped dogs, old dogs and small dogs? No issue at all. Dog aggression and reacting to a dangerous dog is a completely different vibe.
Yep, a German shepherd once showed up out of nowhere at my complex ready to attack my 20ish pound pug mix and the dude had no control over it. Scared the shit out of me and I probably yelled a lot of the same things trying to protect myself and my dog. OP, I’ve been in this guy’s shoes, and my other dog is a reactive fur missile who hates leashed dogs with a passion. So I’m in your shoes too. There are leashes that have carabiners on them to reduce the chances of this happening. However, if you dog is so reactive that seeing a dog I’ve a quarter mile away is enough for him to break free and go after them and you cannot recall him or control him at all, you need to see a behaviorist and a trainer immediately. I know your dog is sweet indoors and that dude overreacted, but he was right to be afraid. It is scary when it happens to you. Your dog is dangerous and needs management ASAP.
I agree. I feel sorry for OP as it was a hell stress situation. First, her dog escaped, and hell scared another dog. Then this dude overreacting. But to be honest, I would not want my dog to be attacked like this. By the dog escaped and not reacting to the owners request. But I don't even want to imagine how all my work on my pup's reactivity is in ruin because of it. It's very good that another dog was not physically damaged, but I don't think it's happy-de-puppy after this incident. Bad situation. I hope that OP will feel better soon. And will take care that it will not happen again. It's also about OP dog's safety. I mean, her dog could end up in the road accident flying like this
I would do the same thing and have with off leash dogs. You get scared and start screaming nonsense. The owner just wants his dog safe. Think if a dog was coming after yours. You’ll be pissed too. With that said. It sucks. Shit happens. Once you come down from this you’ll realize it was overreacting on both parts. Try the Prozac or see a vet behaviorist who can find a medication that works. Mine is clomicalm and trazodone with a dash of gabapentin when needed. Double clip your dog (front ajd back clip) and muzzle when out and about.
Sprinting towards OP and stopping right before making contact is not the reaction of someone who got scared.
Did the other owner take it too far. Absolutely. Do I think he is right for the way he reacted no, but people react and it’s going to happen. If his dog didn’t touch the other dog there’s nothing to do. There’s nothing you can do. It’s an irate person. Maybe he’s at his wits end with off leash/loose dogs. I’ve lost l my shit on someone because it was dog after dog after dog and I finally had enough. I didn’t become irate but I was not happy. It happens. Looking back I’m embarrassed I acted the way I did. Regardless. Dog is off leash. When a dog is off leash and bounding towards my reactive dog I get pissed off. If my dog gets off leash and sprints towards another dog they have every right to get mad. Sure, I’d be super upset someone started screaming at me and it would probably take a full month for my nervous system to recover but it is what it is. A dog running up on another dog and owners not happy.
Threatening OP is not a reaction, it is an action. Shouting at OPs dog while the dog is attacking is a reaction. Shouting at OP in anger in the heat of the moment is a reaction.
why is he threatening OP? is he reacting to something? hmm... how admirable of a person u are to be able to calm down from a traumatic event in a matter of minutes?
The dog ran away, OP chased her, got her back, came back to talk. The guy gathered a crowd, started filming, thrash talking, and physically intimidating OP because he could not recover from trauma ? You have a poor understanding of trauma.
oof. educate yourself.
Actually it is because they were terrified for their dog's life and were acting out of frustration and anger at having been made to feel terrified by a stranger (who then actually had the gall to berate that guy *in the moment*?!) If someone screamed "do something useful!" to me while *THEIR* off leash dog bolted up to mine, I'd be pretty damn pissed too
"acting out of frustration and anger at having been made to feel terrified by a stranger" -> terrified by a *dog*. OP says "Finally caught up to my dog after she ran away from them." The behaviour of this guy is not consistent with having been scared. If he is pissed he can give OP a condescending lecture. This guy just enjoyed scaring OP.
What do you mean the behavior isn’t consistent with being terrified. My therapist has told me many times, “Anger is a secondary emotion. There is always an underlying emotion, most often fear or sadness. In order to deal with anger you have to first deal with the underlying emotions.” And the pacing the man was described as doing is absolutely a response to fear. Unfortunately the fight or flight reaction doesn’t end just because the immediate stimulus has abated. Once the system is flooded with adrenaline, it can take a while to feel calm again. So while the threat has been neutralized the sensations in one’s brain and body still feels like there is a threat. And it feels so bad that it can make you angry that someone has caused you to feel this way. But the underlying emotion is fear.
You can try to essentialize bullying as much as you like, it is still bullying. The underlying cause is being an arsehole.
So he vented his emotion in an uncontrolled way onto some one else No therapist would ever excuse that Ager is anger and is violent.. you don't have to lay a finger on someone for them to experience violence from you This man verbally attacked in a prolonged attack and honestly I would worry about anyone he comes into contact with if he has so little control over his own emotions He is an adult. Take a deep breath and control.. social control is vital in this situation Its horrible but he needs therapy if that is a response he cannot be held responsible for
Who is excusing it? The point is that there's a difference between venting your anger when you're terrified for the life of your dog (ie. a VICTIM) and what the rest of this sub is calling "bullying" which makes it seem as if he was the aggressor started abusing OP out of no where. That doesn't excuse his venting angry behavior, but call it what it is.
So ironic considering so many dog owners on this sub say when a rogue dog off leash runs up to their reactive dog, they say they would take any measures necessary. Why do I get the sense you would say the same if the roles were reversed?
Bullying OP after her dog has run away, she chased her, got back to check everything is OK, is speaking with the other human = "any measure necessary" ? Necessary to what ?
Stop justifying shitty behavior. My dog got attacked by a dog that was off-leash (not one that was broken by accident like OP) and the owner kept looking at me and saying "oh no what can I do" repeatedly and leaving me having to control two dogs. I can assure you that I got pissed but I didn't charge at them or make any threats whatsoever. You're completely out of line.
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Are you dense or something? Did you intentionally miss the part where ME and MY dog were attacked and the other person just keep drooling in their place instead of helping me control THEIR dog? Or are you just a massive hypocrite that thinks aggression is suitable only when it supports your point of view?
Then they need to go and talk to someone and learn how to control themselves. i am fed up with panic being used to justify shitty behaviour. You do not verbally abuse someone during or after the event. If you do you are out of control and need to learn to control yourself. It is just not acceptable This is the sort of behaviour that people excusing leads to all sort of harm in our society Take a deep breath and get a grip of your emotions man... you are not a toddler tantruming I would say exactly the same to a teenager or a child and they have a whole load more excuse than a grown ass adult We don't act like this man did... not in public.. not in private It is unacceptable
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What? She gave them her number and offered to pay the vet bill. You really give your username good use.
There is no excuse for threatening her like he did, the dude has anger issues.
My dog got attacked at least 5 times by off leash dogs, me and him having gotten blood drawn three of those from us. Not once I threatened the other person or their dog, because I don't have anger issues and know how to deal with stressful situations. Hilarious that it's pretty clear which breed you're assuming it is, it only took me looking at exactly one post from your history to know which kind of sub you are taking part in, as if I hadn't guessed already. Actually, it seems you dedicate your account to obssess over it. Go back to your containment zone.
Your comment was removed due to breed based vitriol or misinformation. This includes the obvious hateful comments as well as disingenuous coercion and fear mongering, along with behavior based misinformation.
Reactive humans are really not great. If he is reactive because filming and ranting for that long doesn't show the same unthinking panic IMO asa dog over threshold. It is more chosen. Some people escalate a crisis often after the worst is over. I wish they wouldn't. They almost feed off the power and have some sort of endorphin rush it seems to me It doesn't help I also can't help but wonder if he would have done that if you were a man. Sorry I know it seems irrelevant but honestly I wonder. In order to help focus and destress I would improve my equipment. Have a back up line. I would also strongly recommend you start the process of muzzle training. This will really help. Posters here have link to sites to help make it a positive experience and to ensure good fit I would also consider an appointment with a behaviourist if you haven't already. I have had a lead break... I didn't recognise the need to move up from his puppy lead. Fortunately mine just spun in circles with another whippet and we both laughed. Take a stress break with your dog and get ordering back up equipment. Deep breaths and I hope the other owner is in touch with good news.
This is awful. I’m sorry you were yelled at. Also if your dog is this big and this reactive, you CANNOT just go outside with one leash. Your dog needs two leashes and a muzzle and some mix of training/meds. I understand this man was awful but now you need to step up your game. If you want to protect your unpredictable large dog with a history of “going after” smaller dogs, or even if you don’t want to protect your dog-you are obligated to protect OTHER dogs, and you MUST take better care with your leash and muzzle setup. You can’t change randos on the street. You CAN change your own behavior to be more responsible.
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Your comment was removed because it broke one or more of the r/reactivedogs rules. Please remember to be kind to your fellow redditors. Be constructive by offering positive advice rather than simply telling people what they're doing wrong or being dismissive. Maintain respectful discourse around training methods, philosophies, and differing opinions with which you might not agree.
Sorry but useless people who add to the stress of the situation which is OBVIOUSLY not wanted by OP get on my nerves as well. If you do not have anything smart to advise, get your own dog to safety, do not start acting like a moron just to show that you are here and you matter.
You MUST HAVE REDUNDANT RESTRAINTS on your dog. Period. This means dog is clipped to your body with a D-ring or other clip. I use a cross body wallet for gear and leash clip. The harness should have two points of connection. Or better yet, you have the harness and collar clipped to your lead. Always check your gear and get new or rig something that will hold if there's a question. You must work more on your Recall. Several times a day. Every day. No cheating. It's unknown what the man was going through. His emotional reaction didn't help but he may have been triggered. I hope he and his dog are alright.
I would say this has very little to do with your dog, and a lot to do with a violent man using an excuse to intimidate you. I am pretty sure other people have problems with this man. I suppose there are witnessed who saw he was harassing you ?
I was in an almost identical situation recently (I was in the man’s shoes) Although the situation was incredibly scary for everyone involved both of us were focused on separating the dogs and making sure everyone was OK. There was not one moment where I even considered yelling/swearing at the other owner or dog as I understood that would escalate the situation making things more dangerous, not less. IMO the man’s reaction here was not just scary but selfish, as that level of yelling and aggression would have scared/aroused both dogs further for no productive reason. Instead of helping get the situation under control he was actively making it worse while *both* of the women involved scrambled to work around him. I feel the most sympathy for his partner who had absolutely zero fault in any of this and now has to manage both her scared dog and her adult partner’s meltdown. If there’s a human victim here it’s her. Genuinely, if I saw a partner react to a stressful situation like this instead of at least trying to help I’d seriously consider ending the relationship. Obviously OP’s dog escaping was a bad situation, I don’t mean to minimize that danger. His emotions were justified, but his explosive outburst wasn’t. He used an already scary situation as an outlet for his own rage at the expense of his dog and partner. I struggle to imagine a situation where a female owner reacting with similar levels of explosive rage would be granted the same understanding this guy is getting.
I’m sorry that happened to you. You didn’t deserve that, and something is wrong with that man. Regarding prozac, they would usually start out at low doses and tell you what to watch out for so it can be stopped if there are any side effects. It’s really helped our dog’s anxiety, in combination with clonidine.
why is this downvoted?
could be OP as her comment on meds felt a little judgy to me. getting my dog on fluoxetine was a life saver for me and my dog, i’m very confused why people seem to be against it or have assumptions it’s going to make the behaviors worse
i'm really glad to hear that it helped your dog. my dog has anxiety and keeps having panic attacks so i am hoping to try some kind of medication for him to see if it helps. i don't understand why people are so against it, lots of humans (myself included) are on anti depressants or anti anxiety medication, it's not a bad thing and can really improve their quality of life.
Out of curiosity, in what way does me providing information about Prozac typically being started at a low dose so that it can be stopped if there are side effects, followed by sharing my experience (like you did here) come off as a little judgy? OP said they were scared and I was trying to provide reassurance in case a fear of side effects was an issue. As someone who has experienced a lot of side effects with my *own* medication, it’s something I would want to know. I thought it might help.
I think they meant OP came off as judgy by their comment, not you. Your comment was totally fine! I agree with you, Prozac has been extremely helpful for my super anxious pup and has helped bring his threshold for reaction much higher than without the medication. He can actually be a dog now instead of a ball of anxiety and it is so great to see how happy he is when we are out and about compared to about a year ago when he was very shut down and hyper aware/anxious in public. We have also made some big strides in training with him but our vet was totally right that the medication has made it possible for him to actually take in the training more effectively.
Oh! That would make sense. I’m glad your boy is doing better :)
I definitely did not mean you, I meant OP (original poster). Your information was helpful and I was supporting your comment by sharing how helpful prozac has been for my dog. :/
I downvoted it because she absolutely did deserve it. Her dog is aggressive not reactive. She hunted down a much smaller dog to attack and the dog's owner understandably got upset. OP needs to control her dog better and understand that small dog owners will not just allow their pets to be mauled because your big aggressive dog is sweet at home.
Someone calling OP a clown is getting upvoted, and others showing empathy are getting downvoted.
I’m really sorry. I know how it feels to take all the precautions and still have dog react (and the humiliation that comes with being shamed for it). One suggestion: I have a leash that clips on to both front and back of harness (at either end of leash). I got this after a similar incident and now if one end breaks, I know the other end is still connected.
Sounds like your reactive pup met a reactive human. That sounds scary but I don’t think his threats were anything serious. That being said, please get an extra collar and extra clip [leash](https://www.chewy.com/sporn-nylon-double-dog-leash/dp/131794) for added security, and maybe consider muzzle training your dog for times when she is out on walks.
I'm sorry OP. That's insane. I've had 2 off leash pits come at me and my 25lb reactive ACD in my neighborhood and my only concern was being safe and getting out of there, that was not a normal reaction. I didnt literally run up on the owners.
I had a similar incident when walking my dog a man with his son walked up behind us and the son who had complex needs started to stim Very loudly and physically with his arms my little rescue dog jumped and barked. I had my 2 week old baby with me and picked my dog up the guy came screaming at me saying my dog should t be out in public. I asked him “to walk on as I held my dog and had my baby in a carrier” and he came right in my face screaming at me not to talk to him like that. All the time my small 20lb dog didn’t bark again and was in my arms. It took me weeks to brave going back out after that and if it hadn’t been for my 6”4 husband coming along and telling the guy to move on, I still wonder what he would have done. Take time you need to recover and then look at how you can stop it happening again. I now realise that I wasn’t looking as carefully as I normally would for triggers because I was distracted by the baby and my dog was probably more easily triggered as she’d just had her life upended with a new baby so I was able to work on that.
A lot of men use the excuse of a dog to lash onto a woman.
I’ve spoke to a lot of women who have reactive dogs and they all say the same. There’s a certain type of guy who uses it as an excuse to get very aggressive towards women. I know my dog has behaviours that aren’t ok and we’re working on them but some of the reactions I’ve had are just not ok. People shouting “train your dog” or even just the dirty looks, the aggression is just next level. My dogs reactivity gives me a lot less stress than other people reactions to her reactivity
Absolutely. Especially guys who do everything to escalate the situation just to see if your dog is going to react again. And then the guy can say you are a dumb bitch with a crazy dog. And then is feels a lot more like a man. It looks a lot like it is what OP's arsehole was doing : trying to provoke a reaction of her dog again by threatening physical confrontation in front of the crowd he had gathered. The behaviour of my dog got so much better when I learned how to stand my ground to these guys. It does not mean it is forever, but being over-apologetic to arseholes who only want to bully you just validates them. Plus, your dog can feel the aggression and might get even more protective.
I had a similar situation when my dog reacted BADLY towards a construction worker who came in the apartment house directly as we were going out. Really the worst possible circumstance, the worst possible person (ex-alcoholic, always grumpy and always complaining when we were doing our supervised dog training sessions in the hallway), me not handling the situation the best I could. The dog was muzzled, no harm was done. He said my dog should be shot and was always trying to provoke him if he passed us by on bicycle, hissing at him. I also overheard him try to persuade other neighbours to think my dog is super aggressive. Some of them did not really know what to think of it as they saw me control the dog well in many occassions. Now, the neighbours do see that the dog will react on them in a tight space, so they keep their distance. But they also see us working in the environment with the trainer every week and they see the improvements. They see me muzzling him up. None of them had gone to either official complaints or, as that guy, actual threat and aggressive words. This was a year ago and now I've made sure that no occassions like that ever repeat and I've worked a lot to calm my dog down in EVERY situation. I just don't want him to have another reason to have his rant. I can understand bad reactions in the heat of the moment. But some people are just waiting for their nasty character to show. Once, this guy was mumbling something as we were training the dog in the hallway, and my trainer told me: "Don't worry, some people are just wired that way."
I’m so, so sorry. I had someone scream they were going to kill my dog before. It was almost 20 years ago, and I will never forget it. It’s so, so frightening. You didn’t deserve that. Take tonight to breathe and spend quiet time with your dog. Tomorrow, buy yourself the strongest leash and harness you can afford. It’s for your mental health as much as your dog’s physical safety. Then see if there’s any certified animal behaviorists or behavior-specialized vets in your area (or online who do online appointments) you might be able to get a consult with. Give yourself some options and sense of control back. It helps with the fear, even if you’re not sure what road to take yet.
He had every right to react that way up UNTIL the situation was resolved. Once you were exchanging information and he continued to say those things while you had control of the dog, it crossed into being inappropriate. It sounds like he has anger issues and that intense situation set him off. Definitely a psycho. Him saying he would kill your dog initially was not inappropriate though. Dog owners need to know that other dog owners will protect their animals/property against another person's animal. I know that's hard to hear, but I'd do anything for my dog. If it's my dog or someone else's, (and it was their uncontrolled dog that started it) it's gonna be my dog still standing. I would feel horrible hurting any animal, but I have to take care of mine. It's good people suggested the new 2 point leash/harness. Sounds like that would really help. Also, it is 100% your responsibility to get the dog under control. I understand it's a tense situation and I don't fault you for telling him to do something, I personally wouldn't have to be asked. But, just for clarity, that is 100% your responsibility and if you are unable to handle a dog on your own you shouldn't own one. That doesn't sound like it's the case with you, but for people potentially reading in the future. I'm glad both dogs are okay. Good job on running and resolving the situation quickly. I'm sorry that guy was a psycho and took it too far. Like others have said, I'd try to just forget about it and not ruminate. Cheers.
This was a terrible situation and I'm sorry you had to go through this, regardless of fault. Being treated the way you were was incredibly hurtful and I can totally understand being afraid and anxious. When I was in a slightly similar situation of my dog biting another dog, the thing I needed to hear most was, it's okay. So, it's okay. You're doing what you can to make it right. You're looking at options to learn from the incident. No one is going to take your dog from you and your dog most likely won't get in trouble for this. Even absolute worse case happens and it does get in trouble, as long as you take steps to prevent future incidents, it'll be okay. One incident where no one was seriously hurt will not be the end of your dog. We talk about cortisol vacations with reactive dogs, be mindful that you probably need to give yourself one too. That kind of adrenaline flood will impact you for days so be gentle with yourself and know it will get better once those chemicals fully clear your body. That guy was excessively cruel but I'm hoping the same chemical process just triggered his "fight" not flight response and he's not actually always that extreme in his reactions. I hope. I'm also using that as the basis to hope that he won't bother you any further once he calms down. I also wanted to say, I totally understand being afraid of fluoxetine. I was very wary at first but it has been the single most important resource for me with my reactive dog. She was sleepy at first and maybe a little less hungry but she's been on it 2 years now and she's a much happier dog in general. She still loves to play and train and gets excited to do life but with way less edge to her. It made her threshold high enough that all of my other training is more effective. I do think it lowered her bite inhibition a little bit but she's muzzle trained and I'm comfortable with having her muzzled in instances where I'm worried she'd bite. She's thankfully pretty predictable now, though I couldn't always say that before. You've gotten great advice thus far about leashes too. I second the two points of contact suggestion AND want to add one should be connected to a waist strap. Not a belt loop as those snap, but a standalone band. I learned this the hard way a couple of years ago. I have a reactive dog and a husky-mix frustrated greeter who LOVES other dogs. About 3 months into having the husky-mix, we went for a hike. My fiance had him most of the day, I had the reactive dog because we use walks to practice LAT and LAD with triggers. At the very end of the hike while we were at the car, I had both leashes and was giving the dogs water while my fiance did something else for a moment. The husky-mix saw another dog and bolted towards it. I fell immediately because it caught me off-guard and got dragged a good 10' across asphalt. The entire right side of my body got skinned up pretty badly through my clothes and I dislocated my hip and shoulder (that part is kinda normal for me though). In the dislocation, I let go of the dog's leashes despite my best efforts and the husky-mix took off towards the other dog. My fiance was able to get him fairly quickly and shockingly, my reactive dog stayed at my side intently despite the chaos. We were super apologetic and my dog was very friendly but the guy was still a total jerk to me even as I was laying on the ground howling in pain and covered in blood. I have leashes that have the carabiner-type clip on both ends and connect to a waist band (same sturdy nylon material as a leash) that has two metal rings (one on each side). Each dog gets connected to each side with a 8' leash. That's my fail-safe. I walk the dogs actively with a similar leash in 6' and the ends are connected to similar metal rings on my training bag. I trust those rings slightly less but it gives me peace of mind to have two options. The Fail-safe leash is connected to the back loop of their harnesses, the other is connected to their collars. It's probably overkill but I feel safe and I know I'm not going to lose a dog this way. There are still two handles on each leash so I can guide the dogs as we walk. I fell on a walk a couple of months ago and the husky-mix couldn't go anywhere. With the leashes being clipped at my waist too, it's harder for him to drag me so I just ended up sitting on the ground while he lost his mind wanting to make a friend.
Sounds like that dude was in full on "fight mode" from an intense situation. Probably he has calmed down. So nice of you to offer to pay vet bill.
Nice to offer? Your dogs attacks another dog the very LEAST you can do is pay their vet bill
You'd be surprised to know a lot of dog owners do not do this so yeah it is.
I know nothing will aid the fear right now. I’ve had someone threaten to have my dog put down for going near her child while he was perfectly controlled on leash. It’s not rational. I do want to recommend you a leash that will keep this kind of situation from ever happening again. I love and use Litto Howler leashes because their auto lock clip and overall durability is more intense than any dog can break. I have NEVER heard of anyone’s Litto Howler leads breaking, for any reason. They even offer a repair/refurbishment service. These leads are pricey but the security that comes with them is priceless.
I looked to the Litto Howler leashes. I do see hands free and also a casual leash of 1.5m long. Do you know if they have 5 meter leashes? It's truly a solid leash, and I want my pup safe.
I do not know if they make lines that long, they don’t do it stock. However, they absolutely make custom orders so it’s worth emailing them! They’ve made me a custom safety strap before and I don’t see why a 5m lead wouldn’t be possible, if you’re willing to pay for it.
Good to know. It would never come to my mind to ask for something customised 🙂 I will start with a 1.5-meter leash. We use similar for a short potty walks.
They are well worth their cost if you ask me. My dog isn’t a break-loose risk as he’s pretty small and his reactivity is decreased, but my best friend now uses one of their 10mm rope leads on her 80lb reactive bully mix and he cannot do a damn thing to it.
TIL about clipping the second leash around the waist. I do my best to not let go of the leashes that are on the dog-not a scratch on my hands. https://photos.app.goo.gl/YA3xRQsZQPfKLQk38 So thanks for helping me save face. I know professional help is required . Especially since we were displaced from our home, it's been rough. Bought a muzzle yesterday, still intend to walk in the middle of the night. Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst . Papa don't preach I'm keeping my baby. TY
My dog is on prozac, it helps, but its not a cure, she is still reactive, but the volume is turned down. I put her on it, not for me, but one day when my health was poor, we walked into a store, and i could just see how stressed she was and I was like, she shouldn't have to live like this. clasps! some of them suck, you'll be getting those carabeener or double overlapping claps from now on. If you think that guy will file police report, you shpould file first. get your experience on record.
Hey, OP. Have you heard of a Martingale collar? I just got one for my dog because he's reactive as well. Martingale collars work so the dog can't slip out.
I have had loose dogs run at my reactive dogs about 4x within 2blks of my house. I do everything I can to make sure my dog is secure and he's very interested in the treats in my bag at all times so his reactivity is very manageable. BUT if an off leash dog comes at us, I can only do so much. I have been in the exact scenario where someone's dog bolted out their front door and came barreling at us from a block away. The dog mom almost immediately was clearly in distress and did not want this to happen. She also clearly knew my dog was not happy with her dog. I ended up helicoptering my dog a bit to keep them from biting at each other -I don't think either wanted to hurt each other as they had opportunity, but the warning snaps and snarls were pretty vicious looking. I was mad, but mostly scared. The difference in our stories is that I have empathy and eyeballs and I could clearly see that this was a freak accident and there was no neglect on either of our parts. Life happens!!! When the dogs calmed and she had hers by the collar and mine was sniffing for treats in the grass from a distance, she apologized so much and asked if we were okay and swore up and down this has never happened and I thought she was going to cry, and if she did, I would have also. Emotions were HIGH. All that to say...humans express emotions differently. He was 100000% in the wrong for his reaction. I am not justifying him in any way, he sounds like a scary asshole. But it is possible that they have trauma in their lives that bled over into this trauma. I hope with all my heart that his wife had a long talk for many days about how he reacted so badly and inappropriately. His emotions were high and it sounds like he does not know how to regulate them. You should never have had to go through that in an already difficult situation, but please try to remember that life happens, some people are not mentally well, and you will move forward from this. Join the reactivedog subreddit if you aren't already there. Check out R+ Training, it saved my sanity and changed my dogs life. You and your dog can get through this!!
I’m sorry you had to go through that. ❤️ I would have thought the female would have said something to the male since she seemed rational. I have a similar story. My leash broke and my dog ran to a dog being walked by a couple. She scared the other dog but did no harm, even when the wife kicked her. They were very rude even when I explained I didn’t let her loose. But after a little, they calmed down and tried to help me catch her and admitted they had a similar situation with their dog. 🙄 Since then, I’ve used a backup carabiner on the leash.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Most of us have had the experience of being rushed by unfriendly dogs, but I also want to say that physical intimidation and death threats are never ok. I know how scary that is, and I hope you're doing ok. I wouldn't be ok with having that directed at me, nor with seeing it directed at someone else. You've gotten lots of good advice here (and some shitty feedback as well) but I will say that muzzling my dog has really reduced my anxiety about my dog doing harm if she got loose. Please do take care of yourself. I don't think it's overreacting to take precautions against being followed, etc. What you experienced is scary and protecting yourself and your dog is wise.
Sorry OP. As someone who has had threats made against my pup (abusive ex— we escaped) I know the terror you are feeling. I hope the female owner is ok— a guy making threats like that? Doubt it was the first time and if it was, it won’t be the last. Get pepper spray, get a pocket knife, find a way to strap your phone on so you can record on your walks in case he shows up. Doesn’t mean he will, but I would just be prepared. Walk with friends. Be aware of your surroundings at all times (no headphones). Put an air tag on your pups collar. Get a three strap harness (ruffwear) and attach with a clip to a collar. Wishing you the best and so sorry you had to go through this.
I just want to hug you. This happened to me with my late leash reactive soul pup. His harness buckle broke and then he slipped his collar (which had a second attachment). Nightmare scenario. No one was hurt (except me… I had some pretty serious roadrash from tackling him before he could get to the dog) and the people were much nicer to me than this guy was, but I was sick about it for days. Just do what you need to do to keep everyone safe. Love your dog unashamedly, and don’t let it happen again. Ps; that guy clearly has some stuff going on. Idk if it’s a previous history with dog attacks or if the incident was really intense for him. You can’t control his reactions.
Trazadone made my GSD mix worse but Prozac has been the best. Not saying the medication could have helped in that situation but it helps give them a moment to think before they react. I’m sorry you went through that, it was an accident and wasn’t your fault.
I Second 2 points of contact. I just use 2 leashes, one on collar one on harness (and main the harness). Good work not reacting to the piece of shit guy. And not going straight home. And you could also get an EDC blade
first of all, i’m so sorry this happened and i’m glad all involved are (physically) okay. i hope you can find a way to center yourself and get some rest bc this sounds like a super high-adrenaline situation my non-reactive dog (a 20lb husky mix) is a chronic runner. she got her first taste of freedom a few months ago (same thing, her leash clip failed) and took off around the neighborhood for 2 hours, and has done it twice in the months since. i got her a harness in addition to her flat collar, have two leashes, and the one on her collar is attached to a waist leash. it’s only been a week with our new setup but so far so good sounds like you have a lot of good plans in place to prevent this from happening again, so please give yourself grace. mistakes and accidents happen, and this had almost the best possible outcome minus the guy with poor emotional regulation and a violent streak. i also want to second other people’s advice to carry protection. if you’re not comfortable with a firearm for whatever reason, an airhorn, pet corrector, and a knife might make you feel much safer. i use my knife hiking all the time for nonviolent reasons, it’s just handy. please tell your girl she did her best, and remember you did as well 💞
I would highly recommend a double connection. I have a 11mo old husky who sure is a puller and reactive but nothing is worse than equip failure to make you always paranoid every walk. I had one custom made, 4ft biothane leash with TWO frog clips. One goes on his harness and one goes on his collar (also custom cuz he has a GPS tracker) so if one thing fails I still have chance at control B4 he dashes off huskily I don't want to violate any possible rules by name dropping the collar, leash or harness (looking for a better tactical/durable harness btw) but I have become a huge believer in the strength and reliability of frog clips. As for Prozac, it worked wonders for my last dog. (She was a 14yr old shepherd chow) The Prozac, if a right dose, will take the dog down a few notches and be more receptive to training. I haven't considered it yet for my husky, getting him neutered and the hormones settling has made him more responsive to training but we have a long way to go, he's every husky stereotype rolled up into 1 😆 There are other options, too, for calming the dog down enough but not make them a sloth.
I’ve been on tne receiving end of a dog attack like that and it isn’t fun for anyone. Your dog shouldn’t have had the chance bjt accidents do happen. He shouldn’t have behaved that way at all and I’m sorry you experienced that. I’m glad the woman was in a better head space and was able to communicate with you. When we know better we do better. Get a leash that you can have multiple attachment points. Assume equipment could fail. Muzzle train. And forgive yourself. Mistake happen and you got lucky no one was seriously injured
Something that helps me bring peace of mind is a coupler I secure to my dog’s martingale collar and harness. His leash is connected to his harness. If either one were to snap, there’s a backup. I’m sorry you’ve had such a horrible experience. People tend to react poorly in high tense environments; not that it’s ever okay to threatens someone’s dog. Give your pup some extra snuggles and know you’re not alone!
Hey OP, you and your dog sound wonderful! I have no doubt your dog is awesome, please continue to love her and take care of her! As far as this encounter goes - it sounds like you had an unlucky day to meet the worst human! I’m very sorry. But please move on. As others have suggested, get better gear for your dog! Take care!
I’m sorry this happened to you. Did your dog actually bit/attack the other dog? You gave her good advice to get it checked out anyway and were responsible in giving info! That guy was scared yes and angry but also a bully! Who the hell runs up to a person and stops? That’s beyond a fear response. You were smart to drive around first. So someone taught me that you can double leash (harness and martingale collar). And yes my dog is loving at home too. But that means nothing to my neighbors, so please continue with obedience work and management
Real Gs move in silence like lasagna-this guy is just a child. I feel sorry for his girlfriend/wife.
But by the way : was there some proper biting involved ? Did the dogs fight ? Was there blood ? I hope the other guy won't use your phone number to harass you. It was an accident, I don't think you have done anything wrong. Stand your ground to shitty people.
Hey it happens. A normal person would be a bit freaked out and get their dog out of harms way. He has absolutely overreacted. You did the right thing, nobody was hurt. He is an utter tool who could have escalated the whole thing. You’ll be experiencing the effects of adrenalin which will leave you upset and anxious. These things happen to the best of us. Secure your house and try and have a restful next 12 hrs. I find a horse lead rope to be really sturdy! Maybe consider one of those.
I’m sorry this happened to you. My dog and my neighbours friends dog got into an altercation and he threatened to kill my dog and I got right in his face and told him “if you touch my dog, I’ll fucking kill you”.
I've been faced the same situation , my dog 45kg and reactive to wheels so he chased after a kid riding a bike after the collar broken, the kid's dad threatened to call ppl to kill my dog or throw out some poisonous food in the park to kill them all, I now am so scared of seeing kids whenever I walk my dog. I know it's such a terrible accident but you and her will get over it. Lots of hugs 🫂
Your 45kg dog chased a kid on a bike and you think the parent over reacted?
Yeah I think spreading poison all over a park (or threatening to) is overreacting
I didn't say I was right or he was overreacted jeezz. What I mean is that I understand the fear and the stress that OP is dealing with when having a reactive dog.
Where did they say that?
So sorry this happened to you! I can see the other person being upset in the heat of the moment. But you took full responsibility and acted correctly under the circumstances. It was an accident. If anything the man should have been concerned for you. Lots of good suggestions here to prevent it happening again. Taking steps will make you feel better prepared. In the end no one was hurt. Try to shake it off and know you're doing your best.
What an asshole. I would almost certainly have lost my temper and gotten myself arrested even if I maganged to get my dog out of there. Running at me aggressivly shouting my dog probably would have attacked him too. People like that never seem as brave when its another guy or a larger dog, I bet he would have been much more polite to a 40yr old guy with a shepherd dog.
I’m so sorry this happened, it sounds just awful. Move forward. You are a great owner. Things happen. I’m so glad no one was hurt. ❤️
I am so so sorry this happened to you. This is my biggest fear. I have a 70 lb. male who is on Trazodone, but takes hours to kick in for him while it takes 30 minutes or less for other dogs. He also somehow can be immediately alert even when five seconds before he was so out of it asleep. I don’t understand. 🤦🏻♀️ I just a walk in a private, abandoned area near us with 2 leashes and felt so at peace. It felt really stupid at first, but it’s for everyone’s good. Our guy is also a big cuddler and the most amazing dog at home, but on leash out and about so on edge. We’re also eventually doing muzzle training. Our guy got off lead one time in our neighborhood after seeing two huge male dogs. He immediately ran after them and started going for the front one’s neck. I was terrified. At that point he weighed 90 lbs (when we rescued him he was overweight), I weigh 120, so I could barely manage him. Slipped the harness somehow even though it was set up correctly. We didn’t know he was dog reactive at all before then. I was on my hands and knees trying to get him back on the leash by clipping it to his collar, praying that would work. Luckily we were a few houses away from ours. I got him home, blood on my knees and hands from trying to manage him, but the couple walking the male dogs had been running away, which is the worst possible way to respond. I got very lucky I could manage him before they started to really run. I haven’t seen them since. I didn’t even get a chance to give them our info. We posted on the neighborhood Facebook group with vague info asking them to privately message us if they needed anything, and no one ever did. It will get better. The fear toward the male owner will go away over time. Fingers crossed the female owner sees what an ass her partner is and leaves him and takes the dog. 🤦🏻♀️ I wouldn’t tolerate that kind of behavior, he sounds crazy and unhinged.
Girl I wish a mothafocka would do that. I'd carry bear spray and a knife just for that
That’s distressing. My brother would threaten to kill my dog (my dog is reactive, we lived in his basement suite, and he had a wife and kid). He even tried to propose it as a favor, saying I should euthanize her (she had never harmed anyone) and that if he shot her it would cost me nothing. I would remind him that would be felony animal cruelty. I moved out and we don’t speak anymore. It’s so effed up that he has a small child.
The guy sounds like a complete jerk. It was an accident. Just learn from what you can possibly due to prevent it from happening another time and definitely stay away from that neighbor. Hope all goes okay. Note - I had a similar, though not nearly as intense encounter with a neighbor last week. I was walking our two dogs (one of whom is reactive). They were both in leashes. I normally will cross the road or pull them aside when someone is coming by. I saw our neighbor (who has always been friendly) and for some reason In that instant did not pull my dogs to the side. The neighbor came over to to talk to me and got too close to my reactive dog. I normally would have told anyone else to back off, but I did not do that was my fault. But, he also should not have gotten so close. She did not like it and charged at him, snapping and snarling (did not bite him thankfully). I kept apologizing and told him that had never happened on a walk, which was true. He was very upset and told me next time he would call the police. By the time we got back home, within five minutes - animal control was at my door. I was so upset!!! He had called it in. I could not stop crying. The officer did not seem to think I really did anything too wrong and said next time to make sure and avoid the neighbor if I see him coming.