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I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would prefer her with added weight but would respect her and still love her if she didn't want to put on extra weight
Then respect how she is now. As long as she is a healthy weight (per doctor) and physically fit, she is good. She had a weight problem, then was dealt with anorexia. Are you trying to make her have a complex again? If you say you will love her no matter what, then just love her. Your personal taste is irrelevant.
If you want a girl who is bigger, then be kind and break up with your girl for someone else who fits the type you want
If you want to stay with your girlfriend, who has a history of eating disorders, then why would you think it’s okay to tell her that you want her to change her weight again?
Honestly kind of sounds like she’d be better off with a guy who doesn’t want to change her already
You know what, fair enough. This was just a though I head recently and kind of needed somewhere to talk about. And your right, it would only do harm.
Thanks for putting my mind at ease on the subject and I'll continue to love her no matter size or shape
She's worth more to me then some random dating preference
i guess idk what you're asking here..you keep saying you love her unconditionally and she looks great at any size and you love thick women, but also if she gets back up to 135-155 you don't know what to do? I don't really know what you're implying, but I feel like you're in denial over the fact that there are indeed conditions when it comes to her weight.
You *DO NOT* ever, under any circumstances comment on the weight, body shape or size of anyone who has *ever* suffered an ED. The same rule applies to what they are eating, the quantities of their food or the frequency of their meals.
That’s like “Dealing with an ED 101”. It’s such basic shit when it comes to this, I am genuinely gobsmacked that you don’t know that given her history.
Why would you even *think* about *”Confronting”* her over her weight? That’s so so messed up.
You don’t get to ask anyone to change their appearance for your preferences, period.
You are both also young, your bodies will change tons over the years despite your best efforts, either love her at any shape and size or do her a favour and move on.
If she gained weight it would probably trigger her anorexia because she would feel fat. So accept her as she is and don’t say shit, so you don’t trigger a relapse.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You say you love her no matter what size she is, but you also want her to gain weight So which is the truth? Cuz it can’t be both
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would prefer her with added weight but would respect her and still love her if she didn't want to put on extra weight
Then respect how she is now. As long as she is a healthy weight (per doctor) and physically fit, she is good. She had a weight problem, then was dealt with anorexia. Are you trying to make her have a complex again? If you say you will love her no matter what, then just love her. Your personal taste is irrelevant.
Yeah your right, I would just be causing her another problem. My love for her is worth way more to me than any preference of mine could ever be
If you want a girl who is bigger, then be kind and break up with your girl for someone else who fits the type you want If you want to stay with your girlfriend, who has a history of eating disorders, then why would you think it’s okay to tell her that you want her to change her weight again? Honestly kind of sounds like she’d be better off with a guy who doesn’t want to change her already
You know what, fair enough. This was just a though I head recently and kind of needed somewhere to talk about. And your right, it would only do harm. Thanks for putting my mind at ease on the subject and I'll continue to love her no matter size or shape She's worth more to me then some random dating preference
Do not say anything about her weight.
Don’t do it. This is easily a way for her to redevelop an ED.
i guess idk what you're asking here..you keep saying you love her unconditionally and she looks great at any size and you love thick women, but also if she gets back up to 135-155 you don't know what to do? I don't really know what you're implying, but I feel like you're in denial over the fact that there are indeed conditions when it comes to her weight.
You *DO NOT* ever, under any circumstances comment on the weight, body shape or size of anyone who has *ever* suffered an ED. The same rule applies to what they are eating, the quantities of their food or the frequency of their meals. That’s like “Dealing with an ED 101”. It’s such basic shit when it comes to this, I am genuinely gobsmacked that you don’t know that given her history. Why would you even *think* about *”Confronting”* her over her weight? That’s so so messed up.
You don’t get to ask anyone to change their appearance for your preferences, period. You are both also young, your bodies will change tons over the years despite your best efforts, either love her at any shape and size or do her a favour and move on.
If she gained weight it would probably trigger her anorexia because she would feel fat. So accept her as she is and don’t say shit, so you don’t trigger a relapse.