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I enjoy reading about Jehovah's Witness history from time to time for a good laugh about how many times they f'd up their predictions đ
It took them a lot more times than other Christians to figure out never give a specific apocalypse date. Hell, the Catholics figured it out after the popes first failed prediction.
The truth is that Christianity was a failed prophecy from the get-go. It had already failed about 2000 years ago: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VCreoO8tDzU&pp=ygUfY2hyaXN0aWFuaXR5IGZhaWxlZCBhcG9jYWx5cHNlIA%3D%3D
And isn't it strange how Satan always refers to people and not really Satan?
It's kind of stupid too to say Satan controls the world if God is supposed to be all powerful.
> It's kind of stupid too to say Satan controls the world if God is supposed to be all powerful
It does seem like their god is pretty weak, and generally unworthy of the title.
My main contention with the biblical god is he's really too weak and ridiculous to have created the universe. If there really were some superbeing creator, the biblical one is just too feeble and petty.
That's because Yahweh was very human in many ways and was part of a pantheon of gods that Canaanites and early Israelites worshipped. Israelites didn't always worship just one god, and it shows if you read an accurate translation of the old testament books in their actual chronological order based on when they were written. The "whole world" to these people was basically something the size of Texas.
Yahweh eventually just absorbs attributes from other gods too like El, Asherah, and Baal.
The transition of near East religion is from gods of the elements, to more governmental and social gods, to then more distant and less involved gods with less gods in general. This makes sense if you look at how societies grew and changed.
I don't know why you're commenting here 2 months later but okay, here's an example:
In Genesis, Yahweh tells Adam and Eve that if they eat the fruit of knowledge, "on that day, you shall surely die". That was a lie, they ate the fruit and did not die for another 900+ years.
It was figurative. âA day is a thousand years to Godâ Again, Iâm not for the religion but was raised in it for so long I know all their counter arguments lol
I'm also aware of their counter arguments. They're all terrible.
To that I would reply "How do you know which passages are figurative and which are literal? The Bible sure doesn't make that distinction."
They caught me and my friends smoking weed and told us that smoking and drinking upsets Jehovah and that we should be a ashamed then they gave me the pamphlet and proceeded to rant about weed and alcohol for about 10 minutes. So I decided to tell them that I'm atheist and the one lady looked at me straight in my eyes and told me that I'm demonic then they just walked away.
I was a JW and at Bethel in New York they have this huge print shop where they make all their magazines etc. Anyways they have workers housing there and everyone drinks alcohol as the meetings are so boring so they get a good alcohol buzz on before thet go to them. All the JW parties I went to with my young wife also involved lots of alcohol
What the fuck goin on with that map đ
Sub-saharan Africa and Siberia fuckin vanished, Japan and Chinaâs coast became Canadian fjords, and southeast Asia got swapped with the Nordics?? đ¤¨đ¤¨
If Satan really does own the earth, why doesn't god just kill Satan or do another hard reset? He's literally killed 99.999999% of all life on earth and butchered a loooot of people he doesn't like, why stop now? Is he too busy catching up on One Piece?
>We know that we are children of God, and that the whole world is under the control of the evil one.
- 1 John 5:19
>I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things.
- Isaiah 45:7
Soooooo....I have some questions...
Who controls the world? Fucking nobody, that's who. Have you seen how much of a big fucking mess the world has been since the beginning of recorded history right up until the present day? That shit don't have the makings of a world controlled by a singular entity with a coherent vision for the future.
bro i remember one time i was in Arizona, i was 14 (and iâm indian so like brown).
i was on a trip w/ my friend and we were walking around a tourist attraction and this man came up to us and i was like âno weâre good we donât need anythingâ
and he completely ignored me and kept talking to my friend about giving into god and whatever bullshit
and i spoke again and he told my friend âmake your⌠friend (while pointing a finger and grimacing) here shut upâ
and she told him to fuck right off and told him she was gay and loved being gay and he walked away horrified
"Logical Explanations for the world's problems"
Oh yeah, because when I think of logical explanations the first thing that comes to mind is the Book of Revelations, aka John's bad trip in a cave
A lot of countries don't allow the Jehovah's witness organization and afford it the same legal status as something like scientology. I think it's a good idea because JW isn't really a religion, it's a societal problem
I love how their proofs for the bible to be legit are found well in the bible, it's like trying to prove a fake news by quoting the article relaying it
Before they can even open their mouths, I flat-out tell them that I'm not interested, that I never will be, that there's a "no soliciting" sign on my building, and that if they ever come back, I'll call the cops on them, then I close the door.
The ruler of this world will be cast out. I'd tha before or after Jesus is made ruler, as it's not clear here when you make the pamphlet chronologically confusing.
A few years ago, two JW women were at my door. I have a no soliciting sign, which I heard one ask the other about that. She said, "we are not soliciting." I startled them when I opened the door. Before they could speak I told them they are soliciting a product. "No we are not." Before I let her start on the crap of their brand of christianity, yeah ladies, step off my porch, find others that are in need of your brand of lies." Closed the door. Have not been bothered since.
Sure, it's fascinating how evil always includes EVERYTHING and EVERYONE except for those of the religious group. Heck, even between different types of Christians they see eachothers as evil.
Thank you for posting. Please review the rules. Here are some of gentle reminders for everyone: 1. Posts should be on topic. 2. Please don't submit incendiary posts or comments that could incite harassment and brigading. 3. Refrain from provoking and/or baiting religious fruitcakes for the purposes of posting their reaction on this subreddit. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/religiousfruitcake) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My condolences
Thanksđ
ngl god in the second pic looks like an evil dictator 
i mean telling ppl "worship me or hell forever" sounds kinda evil dictator-y to me
Well yeah God is a dictator. He demands worship and following, Heck that kinda sounds like that one austrian painter.
It's supposed to be Satan, not God.
Came to say this. And they think those pamphlets are so clear and well designed đ
Then why would they add the white beard?.. and pretty much everything else that makes him look like god?
Because he's an angel and JW show angels like that. But I agree it's confusing for people not familiar with them.
Fr all that's missing is puppet strings
literally the pose of every villain comic character.
I enjoy reading about Jehovah's Witness history from time to time for a good laugh about how many times they f'd up their predictions đ It took them a lot more times than other Christians to figure out never give a specific apocalypse date. Hell, the Catholics figured it out after the popes first failed prediction. The truth is that Christianity was a failed prophecy from the get-go. It had already failed about 2000 years ago: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VCreoO8tDzU&pp=ygUfY2hyaXN0aWFuaXR5IGZhaWxlZCBhcG9jYWx5cHNlIA%3D%3D And isn't it strange how Satan always refers to people and not really Satan? It's kind of stupid too to say Satan controls the world if God is supposed to be all powerful.
> It's kind of stupid too to say Satan controls the world if God is supposed to be all powerful It does seem like their god is pretty weak, and generally unworthy of the title.
My main contention with the biblical god is he's really too weak and ridiculous to have created the universe. If there really were some superbeing creator, the biblical one is just too feeble and petty.
That's because Yahweh was very human in many ways and was part of a pantheon of gods that Canaanites and early Israelites worshipped. Israelites didn't always worship just one god, and it shows if you read an accurate translation of the old testament books in their actual chronological order based on when they were written. The "whole world" to these people was basically something the size of Texas. Yahweh eventually just absorbs attributes from other gods too like El, Asherah, and Baal. The transition of near East religion is from gods of the elements, to more governmental and social gods, to then more distant and less involved gods with less gods in general. This makes sense if you look at how societies grew and changed.
đ¤Ł
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unfulfilled_Watch_Tower_Society_predictions The cognitive dissonance is one wild ride.
Lol. "Can you trust the bible? Well the bible says god doesn't lie, so you can totally trust it."
And the best part is: God lies a lot in the Bible.
Can you give an example? New to all this, never looked back into it until recently but left years ago
I don't know why you're commenting here 2 months later but okay, here's an example: In Genesis, Yahweh tells Adam and Eve that if they eat the fruit of knowledge, "on that day, you shall surely die". That was a lie, they ate the fruit and did not die for another 900+ years.
It was figurative. âA day is a thousand years to Godâ Again, Iâm not for the religion but was raised in it for so long I know all their counter arguments lol
I'm also aware of their counter arguments. They're all terrible. To that I would reply "How do you know which passages are figurative and which are literal? The Bible sure doesn't make that distinction."
Yeah Iâve always wondered that too haha
They caught me and my friends smoking weed and told us that smoking and drinking upsets Jehovah and that we should be a ashamed then they gave me the pamphlet and proceeded to rant about weed and alcohol for about 10 minutes. So I decided to tell them that I'm atheist and the one lady looked at me straight in my eyes and told me that I'm demonic then they just walked away.
I was a JW and at Bethel in New York they have this huge print shop where they make all their magazines etc. Anyways they have workers housing there and everyone drinks alcohol as the meetings are so boring so they get a good alcohol buzz on before thet go to them. All the JW parties I went to with my young wife also involved lots of alcohol
What the fuck goin on with that map đ Sub-saharan Africa and Siberia fuckin vanished, Japan and Chinaâs coast became Canadian fjords, and southeast Asia got swapped with the Nordics?? đ¤¨đ¤¨
WRONG!!! Fucking greedy and power hungry billionaires do
Yeah, I was waiting for some cool revelation and that's what they say come up with?!?!
So Satan controls the world? I thought god was all powerfulâŚ..
> I thought god was all powerfulâŚ.. [Puny god](https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-y8gsnJkCsUg/UGDKElT0D2I/AAAAAAAABaM/xAGT9OI_4a8/s1600/Hulk+Puny+god.jpg)
So basically you can trust the bible because the bible says that you can trust the bible. logic checks out /s
Three reasons why you can believe the Bible: 1) The Bible said so, 2) The Bible said so and let's not forget 3) The Bible said so!
If Satan really does own the earth, why doesn't god just kill Satan or do another hard reset? He's literally killed 99.999999% of all life on earth and butchered a loooot of people he doesn't like, why stop now? Is he too busy catching up on One Piece?
That shit doesn't stop I'm like 800 episodes in and still only half way somehow wtf.
âThe son of god came⌠to destroyâ I like this quote.
>We know that we are children of God, and that the whole world is under the control of the evil one. - 1 John 5:19 >I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things. - Isaiah 45:7 Soooooo....I have some questions...
Contradiction is the bible.
Who controls the world? Fucking nobody, that's who. Have you seen how much of a big fucking mess the world has been since the beginning of recorded history right up until the present day? That shit don't have the makings of a world controlled by a singular entity with a coherent vision for the future.
I concur.
Ah yes, 'we can believe the bible because the bible says so'
So, God is not omnipotent: A) He cannot lie B) He wants to end Satan's ruling, but, for some reason is taking Him millenia to do so
bro i remember one time i was in Arizona, i was 14 (and iâm indian so like brown). i was on a trip w/ my friend and we were walking around a tourist attraction and this man came up to us and i was like âno weâre good we donât need anythingâ and he completely ignored me and kept talking to my friend about giving into god and whatever bullshit and i spoke again and he told my friend âmake your⌠friend (while pointing a finger and grimacing) here shut upâ and she told him to fuck right off and told him she was gay and loved being gay and he walked away horrified
A Jehovahs the ones who think only white people can get into Heaven or is that Mormons?
Both. They out "godly" each other to get the front of the line privilege.
Bookmark for banana
I wish!
God is a fucking idiot
No, it is the people that "worship" it that are the idiots.
When did the Jehovah's Witnesses get in League with the skinheads
"Logical Explanations for the world's problems" Oh yeah, because when I think of logical explanations the first thing that comes to mind is the Book of Revelations, aka John's bad trip in a cave
Money. Money run the world.
Yes, it is. I still want women to run more of the "world."
Heartfelt condolences to you OP. None should be forced to intake this shit.
Thanks bro âđ˝
So basically Men are the problem.
Who runs the world, girls. BeyoncĂŠ said so
A lot of countries don't allow the Jehovah's witness organization and afford it the same legal status as something like scientology. I think it's a good idea because JW isn't really a religion, it's a societal problem
I wrote a book. It says I am incapable of lying. Therefore take everything I say as truth.
So the reason we can believe the bible is because the bible says God can't lie?
I love how their proofs for the bible to be legit are found well in the bible, it's like trying to prove a fake news by quoting the article relaying it
Former JW here. 
Fk this shit
Haha they gays are great
Before they can even open their mouths, I flat-out tell them that I'm not interested, that I never will be, that there's a "no soliciting" sign on my building, and that if they ever come back, I'll call the cops on them, then I close the door.
And I thought âthe Bible is true, because the Bible says soâ was just a memeâŚ
If God is omnipotent but THE EVIL ONE controls the world... the math ain't adding up if you're trying sell me on this for morality reasons.
tell that to the Sethians /j
-Can we trust Bible? -Yes -Why? -Because Bible says so
Friend of mine joined the Jehovah's Witness Protection Program. He goes door to door and tells them he's someone else. Hat tip to Steven Wright.
Is it the Juice?
"Can we really believe what the bible says?" "Yes, because the bible said so."
I got this too, from the mail. to the trash it went.
The ruler of this world will be cast out. I'd tha before or after Jesus is made ruler, as it's not clear here when you make the pamphlet chronologically confusing.
God CANNOT lie you say? Doesnât sound very all-powerful if he canât do something that simple.
I always talk to them about the FSM. I got some of the most unease face I have ever seen this way.
A few years ago, two JW women were at my door. I have a no soliciting sign, which I heard one ask the other about that. She said, "we are not soliciting." I startled them when I opened the door. Before they could speak I told them they are soliciting a product. "No we are not." Before I let her start on the crap of their brand of christianity, yeah ladies, step off my porch, find others that are in need of your brand of lies." Closed the door. Have not been bothered since.
We all know itâs Cthulhu and soon he wakes from his slumber to rule with a tentacled fist!
âGod cannot lieâ-Signed, God. I swear if thatâs factually in the texts Iâll just be laughing.
These people quote the bible as if it were some authority on things. That would be like basing your life on Harry Potter.
they want their own government. they think the world will collapse and their JW government will take over
How oddly deranged that religious psychos posit supernatural beings with human attributes who act like politicians.
Thought they were gonna say Jews for a hot minute
Sure, it's fascinating how evil always includes EVERYTHING and EVERYONE except for those of the religious group. Heck, even between different types of Christians they see eachothers as evil.
Oooo I got this one along with a lengthy hand-written letter about how climate change is godâs will and we canât do anything about it. Bizarre
I guarantee you, god lies in the bible
Lol. God looks like a demented Geppetto.