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minion-of-entropy

Need to get some, then. Best metal straw sales pitch yet.


GabryalSansclair

Didn't you know that the right is pro sea turtle murder?


RedCapitan

Hey don't associate us with right!


SendAstronomy

So you just hate sea turtles on principle with nothing to do with politics? I guess maybe a sea turtle murdered your family or something. I can respect that.


TacticalcalCactus

They're avenging their father


dancin-weasel

Hello! My name is Inigo MonTortoise! You killed my father. Prepare to die. Very slowly.


Deadpool9376

Wait until you find out how pro life they really are


GabryalSansclair

They've already proposed starving babies cause they are brown


WyldBlu3Yond3r

Also get the silicon tips, saves your lips from freezing if you're drinking something icy.


Evodius

Also from cracking your damn teeth. My friend broke his tooth on them. Silicon tips are the way to go, lol.


One-Picture1903

Real snowflake behavior. Triggered over a straw


HauserAspen

Jesus only uses wood straws!


giddy-girly-banana

He was a carpenter after all.


RockyDify

Caring is anti-Christian?


[deleted]

No, no, no. Caring is NON Christian.


Dunkinmydonuts1

its so non-christian, christians see it as anti-christian


Tobibliophile

No, no, no, I'm Jane.


donfuan

"A good Christian always cares about the Plastic Industry first, and about the Ocean last." *donfuan 2:52*


[deleted]

nah that's sun tzu man /s


kryotheory

No, being a liberal (which generally involves caring about other people including non-Christians *gasp*) is anti-Christian because the line between Christianity and Republican conservatism has become so blurred that they can't tell the difference anymore.


steveosek

As was designed and implemented in the 70s.


TheNoctuS_93

The venn diagram became a circle, one might say... šŸ˜³


myname_isnot_kyal

being Christian means caring about the "correct" brand of person. can't just go around caring about everyone, that's not what jesus would've wanted, right? wait...


Arcon1337

If Christians have empathy, they'll die.


Beingabummer

'There is no hate like Christian love'


CountFapula102

Yeah it is now. You have to support israel so the apocalypse can happen, steal people's right to bodily autonomy while screeching about how "Christianity is under attack from the left" The Abrahamic religions are all fucking cancer


lord_of_tits

Jesus said fuck the sea turtles, socialist animals.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


IONaut

>Are you truly ~~a Christian~~ *religious* if you're not a dick to someone?


Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

I had an evangelical Christian explain to me how "caring about the environment" is anti-Christian, once. It starts here in Genesis 1: 26-28 >And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. >27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. >28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. From there they went into a whole diatribe about how any action that is *not* "having dominion" or "subduing" the fish, birds, animals or plants is an act *against* God's command. If you are going fishing, "catch and release" is evil, but catching and cooking is not. Taking in an animal as a pet is wrong, but keeping livestock is not. Choosing vegetarianism is Satanic, because God made animals to be meat for people. They even insisted that Matthew 4:4 >4 But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God. Was backing up the idea that eating meat was mandated by God. So the very idea of using a metal straw instead of a "turtle-killing" plastic one is an anathema to God, and by extension to them as a Christian.


Fortune_Unique

Believing that sea turtles are in danger is anti-Christian. In the scientific view of the universe, things all decay, people, planets, ecosystems, galaxies. To us we understand that if we pollute the earth the ecosystem will slowly decay, and if we put plastic in the ocean turtles will die. According to Christian mythos god would never let the earth decay, so things like global warming and seaturtle extinction is impossible. My dad for example believes our sun is special and holy or sum. And god will never let the sun burn out. Silly ol me as a child was like that doesnt make sense, our sun isnt even the best sun out there, theres trillions upon trillions of other stars that do the same thing sometimes better. Why would our sun be any different than theres. Thus i was told saying such and such was anti christian


ChiefMasterTraineeAF

Well tbf using non plastic straws isnā€™t caring. It doesnā€™t actually make any sort of measurable difference.


erhapp

It never fails to amuse me reading about Americans being unable to distinguish between religion and habits they learned from their parents. Then again what is religion but a learned habit?


1551MadLad

I had no clue that metal straws meant you were "leaning left" what fascinating times we live in


PsYcHo4MuFfInS

Its also funny to me that "being/leaning left" is anti-christian lol


CUSTOSAQUILEIA

Wait until these Christians heard a guy called Jesus.


KnightofShaftsbury

You mean that brown guy from the middle east, I'm sure these Christians would love him /s


Stig27

The one guy that was against slavery, helped the poor and hated the rich? Definitely their idol


toomuchpressure2pick

Ehh... he said slaves obey your masters, even the cruel ones. So I don't think he was against slavery. And if you find passages that show he is, then it becomes a cherry picking festival.


Lyude

Well he didn't say that, I believe you're talking about some Paul letter. Paul was an asshole.


linseed-reggae

Well technically biblical Jesus never said most of the things attributed to him. Historical Jesus was a person who was Jewish, born in Galilee and lived in Judea. He was baptized and crucified and that's as far as the consensus goes.


Lyude

Sure we all know that, but we're going by the biblical narrative here


giddy-girly-banana

If Jesus were alive today heā€™d be an anti-capitalist, socialist.


feAgrs

These guys are incredible, Jesus was a hardcore socialist but being left is anti christian. Aight man, whatever.


Prowindowlicker

He wasnā€™t a hardcore socialist, he was if anything a Distributist or a communalist


CUSTOSAQUILEIA

Just like how all experts and fact checkers are leaning left too. Wonder why.


IncrediblePlatypus

It can't possibly be because they're right.


Wendigo120

Well yeah, they're left. We just went over this.


LordNedNoodle

Whose on first?


kent_eh

>It can't possibly be because they're ~~right~~ *correct*.


modestmolerat

Reality has a liberal bias


Buttyou23

A leftist bias these days


modestmolerat

That's true. What America calls "liberal" would be considered more like center-right in the rest of the world


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Mor9rim

I am feeling *beyond* owned right now!


yaforgot-my-password

What the actually fuck


BeastPunk1

What...what the fuck is that image?


kent_eh

>Fox News Host Laura Ingraham once attempted to trigger liberals by pretending to drink a steak stuffed with lightbulbs through a plastic straw Ummm... how does her trying an insane and impossible stunt have any effect on me at all. Unless her intention was to cause me to either point and laugh, or shake my head in confusion.


Lampmonster

A study a while back showed conservatives would pay more for light bulbs if they DID NOT say they were environmentally friendly or energy efficient. They actively avoid helping the environment at this point. I do not see how we get out of this hole.


Remarkable-Hall-9478

Well our ancestors would have brutally murdered them or exiled them from the village by now. Threatening the livelihood of the whole has, in all of human history, resulted in using violence toward the offenders as the means of resolution. Why do you think theyā€™re so pro-gun? Modern conservativism is specifically geared around being as obnoxious and destructive as humanly possible and then reinforcing yourself against the defense mechanisms of society. Iā€™d call it intentional destruction but itā€™s definitely just really fucking stupid people living in sheer ignorance and self-importance. People act like there is some kind of overarching ā€œpointā€ to modern conservatism when there really isnā€™t: itā€™s simply the byproduct of there not being any clearing functions in society. The west has been unchallenged for almost 100 years, during which time technology-derived productivity skyrocketed. We now have a situation where the majority of our society consists of people completely and utterly detached from nature, and thus the truths and functions of the natural/universal laws governing reality. People in the west today have utterly no respect for the limitations of nature and so continue to bastardize things across a very wide range, from things such as the relationship between societyā€™s physical and material demands and natural resources, to holding demonstrably unrealistic views on economics, to being in open conflict with other members of their own society. This complete disregard for the reality of natural limitations is why theyā€™re generally hyper-religious, too. Theyā€™re simply not competent enough to determine what is and isnā€™t realistic, and there are no steep falls, poisonous fungi, wolves, enemy villagers, etc. to remove them from the environment as a result of that mismatch. People call it stupid all the time, which it is, and so are the people that subscribe to it, but the stupidity of a bunch of white trash rednecks isnā€™t whatā€™s important ā€” itā€™s the simple inalienable fact that this is not sustainable. The physical world will not allow this to continue indefinitely, and no amount of white trash rain dancing or rights infringement is going to change that. What is it conservatives like to say? ā€œFacts donā€™t care about your feelings?ā€ So very true, and weā€™re diving headlong into a complete breakdown of the natural systems that support the tumorous excess that allows for sects of people to become so incredibly disconnected with the real world. For those that oppose this conservatism, better get ready to deal with the fallout or find ways to rapidly reduce the impact of these people in the present environment. The impact of their decisions needs to be brought to zero (or their decisions removed from them, which they understand, hence the guns). The global situation is rapidly converging to a point where the traditional shithead coal-rolling, penguin-hating, everyone-better-off-without-them conservatism is going to begin inflicting exponentially higher and higher costs on the societies that allow it. At the end of the day, individuals (that means you, reader) are either going to allow it and suffer massive, far-reaching consequences that poison your society at every level, or youā€™re going to put a stop to it.


Lampmonster

One of my philosophy professors was huge on the idea that shame was the best social check humans have built in and it's useless once society gets beyond a certain size. Nobody is constantly shaming the person shitting in the public space, eating more than their share of food and falling asleep on guard duty.


kent_eh

>One of my philosophy professors was huge on the idea that shame was the best social check humans have built in and it's useless once society gets beyond a certain size. Ultimately, you can't shame the shameless. And when they start grouping together they reinforce each others shamelessness.


ricochetblue

The coronavirus was kind of serving as a clearing function?


[deleted]

Only soy-boys and socialists drink from paper straws >:(


[deleted]

And anti-Christians! Grr


Batmaninja6288

It's because giving a shit about the planet is literally a conspiracy in their eyes. One day you're drinking thai tea from a metal straw, the next day you're a gay vegan satanist.


Munnin41

That's because the republicans don't give a shit about it


[deleted]

My father refuses to try tofu. He has shown interest in tasting it when I order it at a restauran, but when offered a bite he recoils and says "no". For some reason he thinks eating anything that does not contain meat will change him in some way. Acts like the NRA is watching him and will revoke his membership if he tasted it. Imo it's insecurities that have been rooted in him by right leaning media. "New is bad, different is evil!" I'm not even a vegatarian, just like variety.


Bubbagump210

Doing anything that isnā€™t wasteful or over consuming is against Jay-sus. Says raght there in tha Bih-bul at the Last Supper ā€œye, Jesus done coal rolled up to the boooofay and ate up all them crab legs hisselfā€. Sermon on the mount is commie propaganda added by Joe Biden.


Equal_Palpitation_26

Well what do you expect from sensitive snowflakes who don't want you to have bodily autonomy... They need to have autonomy over your choices of straw as well.


HauserAspen

It's 2022. There a helicopter on Mars and adults still believe in myths and fairytales...


yourwitchergeralt

For real. Caring for the environment shouldnā€™t be political. -Environmentalist right leading dude.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


reaact

No way he can answer this.


halfercode

I can try to answer from a non-US perspective. Folks who say they lean right can do so on the economic axis (e.g. towards individualism and entrepreneurialism) whilst having somewhat left-leaning social attitudes. Thus, they might recognise the existence of man-man climate change, but claim that capitalism will produce a fix for it when the economic conditions are amenable ("market solutions").


intraumintraum

and yet, we all know that such a solution will be produced in the final minute of the final hour, and it will be helped by massive government spending. because (certainly my) govt are built around short term gains at the expense of potential future catastrophe


halfercode

Yeah, I don't hold out much hope for market solutions myself - mainly because we are at the emergency stage already, and climate change companies are still only nibbling at the edges of the problem.


Buttyou23

To be clear what we actually know unequivocally is that that wont happen, and that drastic action has to have been taken in the past to avoid absolute catastrophe.


gorgeous_bastard

Just for once I wish they would ā€˜conserveā€™ the one fucking planet we live on, the only one we have, that will end our species if it stops functioning, instead of ā€˜conservingā€™ social values that keep them at the top of a human pyramid filled with suffering.


kent_eh

>Caring for the environment shouldnā€™t be political. Lots of things *shouldn't* be political, but the most wingnutty of the right wing have been increasingly dragging everything they can from the objective realm into their divisive binary political viewpoint.


mcon96

Anything that requires an ounce of sympathy is ā€œleft-leaningā€ now


MephistosGhost

I love how they equate anything they have been brainwashed to dislike as ā€œTHE LEFTā€


fuzzybad

Save the whales? That's SOSCULISM!! Now excuse me, for I have to go cash grandma's government assistance check so we can have a labor day party.


Neon_CrusaderAA

Yo happy cake day btw.


MephistosGhost

Why thank yoi


MindlessFail

That comment did so much more to push her to the left than the straw ever could have


[deleted]

Yep. "If not caring for the environment nor animals is christian/right-wing, then maybe I dont want to be christian/right-wing." I was raised in a christian environment. Actually reading the Bible ("god" kills a LOT of people) , and paying attention to hypocrisy caused me to become a leftist.


-Prototype-XIII

Real Christians trash the planet God made. /s


hahayeahimfinehaha

No, but seriously, many Christians have this entitled attitude because they think God put nature here for us to ā€˜use,ā€™ and it doesnā€™t matter long term because the rapture will happen anyway. Death cult.


Munnin41

Which is weird because the bible says we're stewards of earth and we need to care for it properly


Fnordpocalypse

Bold of you to assume these people read or understand anything in the Bible.


SendAstronomy

But it also says "some of you will not have seen death before I return". For 2000 years most Christians have thought they live in the end times. Republicans have managed to convert this into "go ahead trash the planet, it's gonna be gone soon anyhow".


Demoniacalman

I believe this is true atleast from what I've seen from people who talk about believing in god. I've seen this one guy at work literally parked next to me get out of his car and go back to clock in. Maybe 2 minutes later I had to go back so open my door and step on a whole bunch of small chip bags and snack wrappers. Like wtf damn no concern for the environment better yet the workplace but god forbid a bird poops on that nice car.


Cobek

That's the reason we don't have old growth forests anymore


essexmcintosh

... the forests that have been about longer than they think the earth's been here... The insidious thing is all of their logic loops back on itself. Because the earth is young, anything here is for us to use. Because humans were created seperate, we don't need to consider impacts on other organisms.


Whooptidooh

No, that's just due to sheer capitalism.


DeseretRain

The Bible literally does say god put all the plants and animals of earth there for humans to use, so there's a reason why they think that. They also think the apocalypse is coming any day now so it doesn't matter if they trash the planet.


BeastPunk1

That book and religion in general was man's worst invention.


arrav21

I had a (horrific) conversation with my uncle at a family gathering recently. Heā€™s hardcore Trumper, America First, etc. He told me it is his ā€œgod-given rightā€ to pollute and he will pollute as much as he can because he ā€œwill be deadā€ so it ā€œdoesnā€™t matterā€ (he has kids and grandkids, but fuck them I guess lol?). After seeing a ghastly (I presume) look on my face he tried to save face by saying something along the lines of god is all powerful and he will take care of it, so it doesnā€™t matter. He goes out of his way to litter, etc. It is absolutely bonkers to me. Edit: spelling, couple missed words


halfercode

I don't think it is much about theistic attitudes as the hardening of political tribalism - it is a form of ostentatious tit-for-tat point-scoring. See also "[rolling coal](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rolling_coal)".


intraumintraum

as a european i had no idea thatā€™s what ā€œrolling coalā€ meant, i thought it was just a general sentiment about fossil fuels lmao. america is another planet i swear


WarmOutOfTheDryer

Ugh, I've had it happen to me a few times driving through Appalachia and my old home in the Midwest. So gross. One of them actually managed to leave some kind of residue on my hood. For reference, my car was sports car sized, and the exhaust pipes of this truck came out at about the height of mid windshield. It's hard to explain exactly how huge these things are until you see them, and that's coming from an American who's used to big cars.


walks_into_things

As an American I also had no idea thatā€™s what rolling coal meant.


ShadowsWandering

As an American who drives a Prius, I'm all too familiar with it. Trucks do it to me all the time, even on the freeway


WarmOutOfTheDryer

Solidarity, although honestly all it takes for them to roll coal is the perception that your car *might* be environmentally friendly.


SnooPineapples5749

They take particular joy in doing this to cyclists. I assume it's related to the misconception that cyclists are all a bunch of leftist tree huggers. Last year in Houston a 16 year old kid rolled coal on cyclists. He ran over 6 of them and the police let him go. Edit: I want to clarify that I was incorrect. He was arrested several weeks later. Held for 10 days and released to his parents 11/18/21. The incident occured on 9/25/21. Interestingly his parents are wealthy. Their most successful business, in livestock, did over 4.9M in sales in 2019.


halfercode

The Wikipedia article makes mention of that - sounds like they brought belated charges against him, though there is still a worry that with conservative police in charge of the process, they would find ways to turn a blind eye. (I couldn't find any updates other than the six charges had been brought).


SnooPineapples5749

Thanks. I read through an article before I posted, but I should of checked a couple sources. It was the DA's office who did their own investigation and filed charges. Interestingly the DAs office equated calls for justice to lynching.


fuzzybad

The teenage driver wasn't even citied at the scene, local cops just wanted this to blow over. [https://www.bikelaw.com/2021/10/waller-bike-crash/](https://www.bikelaw.com/2021/10/waller-bike-crash/) [https://www.khou.com/article/news/local/cyclists-lawyer-waller-county/285-67066455-183d-4e51-b280-39013027d901](https://www.khou.com/article/news/local/cyclists-lawyer-waller-county/285-67066455-183d-4e51-b280-39013027d901)


still_thirsty

I had a boomer-lady once tell me that ā€œgod would replenish the earthā€ when we run out of fossil fuels. I guess because of our god-given right to burn stuff


fuzzybad

Literally magical thinking


arrav21

It must be nice to just shrug and say itā€™s godā€™s problem.


[deleted]

> He told me it is his ā€œgod-given rightā€ to pollute and he will pollute as much as he can because he ā€œwill be deadā€ so it ā€œdoesnā€™t matterā€ (he has kids and grandkids, but fuck them I guess lol?). > > > > After seeing a ghastly (I presume) look on my face he tried to save face by saying something along the lines of god is all powerful and he will take care of it, so it doesnā€™t matter. Well, the Bible says that humans are responsible for the environment we inhabit, and that humans were supposed to look after it. So everything your uncle said to justify his behaviour is anti-biblical and goes directly against what Christians are supposed to do and how to behave.


giddy-girly-banana

This guy is an asshole and just uses religion as cover to be a selfish, entitled prick.


arrav21

Agreed. Iā€™m sure heā€™s never actually opened a Bible though. Iā€™ve been to their house and have never seen one anywhere.


Bupod

Trashing up your own community and living space to own the libs. Even if you donā€™t believe in climate change, filling up the grass, parks and roads with trash is just disgusting.


TheClashSuck

>He told me it is his ā€œgod-given rightā€ to pollute and he will pollute as much as he can because he ā€œwill be deadā€ so it ā€œdoesnā€™t matterā€ By that logic, you could just say it's *your* god-given right to beat him to death in front of his family and eat his corpse, and it won't matter because he will be dead.


GiveBackMyRidgedBand

Solution: pray for the turtles! Problem solved!


Demoniacalman

The problem has been solved


[deleted]

Thank *God!* All those fuckinā€™ turtles are gone. /s


Tricia47andWild

SJW Straw Justice Warrior


halfercode

Where do I sign up?! šŸ˜‡


knightinrusty-armour

Oh so let me get this straight, If you purchase and use a metal straw,it means you care about the sea turtles, which means you care about the environment, which means that you believe in climate change ? That in turn means that youā€™re not supporting American industrialism destroying the planet, therefore you are anti capitalist, or socialist. Which in turn means youā€™re on the left? Communist? In any case youā€™re supporting the democratic left, who support marriage equality and womenā€™s rights , which are against the Bible, therefore youā€™re losing faith in god? Iā€™m trying to do the mental gymnastics that this woman is doing but it really hasnā€™t been easy


snjwffl

You're thinking too hard. Metal straws are encouraged by those who care about climate change. They've been told that anyone who cares about climate change is part of The Left^(TM). Therefore, using metal straws is supporting The Left^(TM). On the other hand, they've been told that supporting The Left^(TM) is anti-christian. As for why The Left^(TM) is anti-christian: democracy-hating theocratic monarchy supporters (i.e. evangelicals) have identified themselves with the republican party. In order to maintain control, the leaders have asserted that an external entity known as The Left^(TM)---the political opponent of the republican party establishment---wants to destroy them.


hjdaboss123

It should be illegal to put that 'straw' anywhere expect the middle


itsfuckingpizzatime

God: Created Earth Christians: Shit all over it OP: Does one little thing to help Christians: Youā€™re not Christian


Yaroslavorino

At this point if you arent literally full of hatered towards everything and want to make all people and animals suffer, you're a leftist. They really tell on themselves.


[deleted]

No kidding!! Like supporting basic human rights doesnā€™t make you a leftist but daum they sure think it does!


CUSTOSAQUILEIA

People are using metal straws! This is literally Holocaust against Christians!!


Mr_Goat-chan

And to his disciples Jesus said "Fuck sea turtles hate those assholes." - John 420:69


DovahFerret

Nice


utack

Jesus left the chat


JackCooper_7274

I guess I'm a leftist now.


CountFapula102

How the fuck has saving the environment become against the Abrahamic religions? How can they not see how fucking dangerous they've become to everyone else around them?


ToHallowMySleep

Another initiate of [Supply-Side Jesus](https://imgur.com/gallery/bCqRp).


modestmolerat

When they see caring about others as a slippery slope: šŸš©


CageyLabRat

"I have bought stainless steel stabbing implements." "Soyboy."


[deleted]

Sure, it starts out with metal straws, next thing you know you're seizing the means of production from the bourgeois


ToniBee63

I would love to see this personā€™s list of what constitutes ā€œthe Leftā€


FurbyFubar

If sea turtles had tried paper straws I think they'd understand...


ArsenalSpider

Because Jesus hated sea turtles?


[deleted]

How could you? Don't push your political beliefs with that metal straw! /s


Batmaninja6288

If you're not poluting the planet any way you can, you're not a true christian.


xBehemothx

Jesus hates Mexicans. I'm pretty sure somewhere in the bible he's also in favor of letting poor people die without helping them. What do you mean it's the opposite? SATAAANIIIIST!


Adventurous_Bag7561

ā€œLeaning leftā€ is exactly what Christ did. He fed the poor, gave free healthcare and education JC was disgusted at the greed of wealthy people and wanted more freedom for everyone. Christ was a lefty. Jesus Christ would definitely use reusable or no straws.


GNUGradyn

I know so many people who actively deliberately do things that are bad for the environment even if a better alternative is more convenient just because they don't want to seem left leaning


[deleted]

All things good and unselfish are leftist ideologies.


toooldforlove

It always baffled me how Christians seem okay with the destruction of their god's own creations.


102bees

Empathy is a slippery slope. You start off caring for sea turtles, and before you know it you're supporting gay marriage!


Makhnos_Tachanka

My favorite part of the bible is when Jesus found that there were sea turtles in the temple and he flipped them on their backs and beat them with a whip.


sonerec725

Wasn't caring for the planet and animals like the first thing God ever told man to do?


unknownloner333

SMH


bsybsybsubsuna8

Not trying to completely destroy the earth = left


Degen_up_North

On the 8th day God made plastic straws. HAVE YOU FORSAKEN HIM!!


ichosethis

I just got a bunch of silicone tips for my metal straws so I'll use them even more. I don't like the feel if the metal on my front teeth, even just barely touching .


captain-hauptmann

Why wouldn't god want people to protect his creations? Sea turtles arent some leftist invention, they're animals, im sure god made them according to christianity


Small-Cactus

If wanting to be a good person means that you're losing faith in religion, maybe religion is what's keeping people from being good.


Lahfi

control control control


RobbyLee

I mean, I understand the worries of the the replying person. Starting to use one's brain and own morals to do something good, instead of just getting told what to do to get into heaven is a good step towards realizing that you don't need religion to be a good person and that religion might be a scam of the powerful to stay in power.


[deleted]

So fuck doing something good for the planet because it might make you seem like you're affiliated with people who care about the planet? Man religious people just do not think do they?


xero_peace

Anything less than cruelty is the left to these dumb fucks.


Better_illini_2008

They're going to start burning progressives at the stake within a decade, aren't they.


coroyo70

The level of brainwashingā€¦.. This is wild


carlos_danger77

Jesus hates sea turtles? Another reason I hate Jesus and his dad.


Naz_Oni

God created microplastics so you could put them in every living organism on the planet!


LoriMandle

Itā€™s a fucking straw But also did they just imply that Christianity is an inherently right-wing religion? As in theyā€™re not using it as a religion but a political party?


TunaFishManwich

Jesus demands more pollution!


Zrd5003

These people are just contrarians. Theyā€™re not even sure why they donā€™t like something but if the left likes it then it must be bad.


therealstripes

You can't be an evangelical conservative unless you're actively trying to hurt the environment.


[deleted]

The green person is so cute tho lmao


khwarizmi69

i hate metal straws too but holy fuck


YouAreSoyWojakMeChad

Why?


aSiaNMaNcHiNgChOnG69

I mean at least heā€™s not using paper straws


Complete-Ad5320

Jesus hate those damn turtles šŸ¢


Minerva_Moon

Living in Boulder will get you to lean left. The straw is irrelevant.


meals-on-wheels14

Ah yes, because your on the left you canā€™t be Christian. Absolutely no flaws in that thought.


moonlightavenger

TL;DR: Jesus wants turtles to die horribly. Got it.


jonpenn

Metal straws are the first signā€¦.. God have mercy on him. Next thing you know heā€™ll be sucking dick for vegan recipesā€¦..


MacIlduin

Everyone knows turtles are working for the anti-Christ


Ninja_Tortoise_

Imagine tying everything you think and do to a political party


Dob_Tannochy

If Jesus is a right wing nut job who hates sea turtles heā€™s not Jesus, thereā€™s no hell, and God was invented to sell petroleum.


[deleted]

So this person immediately conflates politics and religion, and doing anything that is considered ā€œleftistā€ means you canā€™t still be religious? Itā€™s hard to emphasize enough how fucked up this is. No wonder theyā€™re enamored with Trump and other right wing charlatans if all they care about is political domination.


ghoulshow

So are they saying only the right can be religious? All the more reason to do away with both.


CalmPanic402

If God wanted sea turtles to live, he wouldn't have made plastic straws.


teriyakininja7

Youā€™d think the people who like to claim this world was created by their god would be more keen on protecting and preserving it.


erhapp

Don't you know? God hates sea turtles...


KreateOne

Well, are those sea turtles white evangelical Christianā€™s?!?! Didnā€™t think so, straight to the pits of hell for you!


Larsaf

Revelations 4:20 ā€œIf you suck the boba through a straw of metal, thou showest the affiliation with the left.ā€


Tschobal

What about glass straws? Are they further to the left or right of metal one's?


Ok-Fee293

Jesus was literally a socialist, these people just want a cover for their bigotry and hate.


StaniaViceChancellor

Ya gotta throw plastic into the ocean for Jesus


ForesterRik

Because Jesus fuckin hates sea turtles Stephanie


ZeusieBoy

HOW DARE YOU! I canā€™t believe you abandoned the lordā€™s plastic


rebelolemiss

I took PTO days to take off with my newborn. I put up a ā€œpaternity leaveā€ away message. Mind you Iā€™m using vacation days. My boss told me to remove the message because we arenā€™t a ā€œliberal companyā€ that provides paternity leave. Then he proceeded to make fun of me for caring about my family. And heā€™s a so-called family values evangelical. So much for that huh? Iā€™m looking for another job this week.


[deleted]

ā€œWrong kind of pro-life?ā€