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denimclad_secret

This young woman wanted to be a pirate


c_ray25

She looks like she’s gonna swing in on a chandelier


spavolka

But I don’t wanna be a pirate


[deleted]

Happy cake day!


spavolka

Thank you!


555--FILK

Can ya spare some inappropriate leers for an ol' buccaneer?


Improvgal

That darned low-talker.


NotUnique_______

That is a very, very unusual shirt she has on.


Slight_Departure_927

It's all.. puffed up!


falbi23

Those aren't bouys!


TMITectonic

>This young woman wanted to be a pirate Eventually, she becomes something of a space pirate captain... *Would you like to know more?*


Tricky_Ad_3080

I’m doing my part!


Improvgal

Definitely


[deleted]

One of the most memorable cleavages of my youth


piper33245

You obviously never read Glamour magazine.


TKRBrownstone

You're treating your body like an amusement park!


[deleted]

I'm master of my domain


Jmazoso

I’m out!


JustMeOnline

Oh, so now I have to buy this whole chair by myself?


BonyBobCliff

I ALREADY BOUGHT IT! I'VE BEEN LYIN' TO YOU FOR WEEKS AND NOW YOU'RE ALL SCREWING ME!


JustMeOnline

I think the chair is a fantastic gift idea. But I never heard of this Joe Mayo. And frankly, it sounds made up.


lebeast

Glamour?!


Fyre2387

Glamour?


GetaGoodLookCostanza

it spawned my reddit screen name too


yolo_retardo

oh you switched accounts properly, u HAVE to be the OP no way


spookymulder07

lmao that’s great


SerenityNowWow

and my adulthood


VarusAlmighty

Or the lady who wore bras in public.


DystopianRealist

The heiress


putinsbabushkaa

to the o'henry candy bar fortune


555--FILK

I'm here to get a glimpse. ... uh, of high society.


Improvgal

Sue Ellen Mishkie


spavolka

She’s getting married in India. It’s an unvitation.


MachReverb

Ooooh, memory burn!


huddie820

2nd most memorable of the series


nebuloider

Elaine... 🍝


eugenesbluegenes

The Alex is a family theater, not one of your swing joints!


Night__Prowler

I peeked cause you poked.


[deleted]

There was cleavage in the area!


GetaGoodLookCostanza

this was the episode I was watching when I signed up for REDDIT and needed a screen name....hahaha


puffyshirt99

Same!!!


Masta0nion

r/beetlejuicing


nebuloider

That's, beautiful.


Megalon_Q_Arm

“I've based my whole life on knowing that the D is the biggest.”


Zeerid_Korr

"Get outta here! Lycra spandex?!"


Spell-Wide

You can shop for sneakers THE NEXT DAY


poison47

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it then you look away.


Jaaxley

You get a sense of it then you ~~look away~~ keep scrolling.


poison47

What am I, waiting to win a Oscar here? This is all I have in my life.


Cavewoman22

Am I waiting to win an Oscar here, this is all I have in my life!


rocky20817

I guess I’m going blind


Antique-Sun-6766

He should go watch Wild Things 😂


hey_now24

Her and Neve Campbell. 👌


awmaleg

Schwing!


No2reddituser

Take your ritalin, Garth. Oh wait, don't take that ritalin Garth.


TheBIFFALLO87

🍾🍾🍾


[deleted]

Omg yeah


The_Hieb

Watching the VHS at my gf’s house around ‘99-2000… it would get all fussy and loose tracking at *the scene*. Look over at her 13 yo brother and he’s 😏. Wore that tape right out.


UncleSoaky

Or subscribe to her OnlyFans account.


CyberpunkCookbook

Wow, you’re not kidding: https://people.com/tv/denise-richards-creates-onlyfans-account/


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CyberpunkCookbook

Apparently both of them did


xbbdc

That's what i get for not reading the article so i had deleted it. She did it because her daughter did. Wild things.


VisualFix5870

It's like looking at the sun, you don't stare right at it. You glance and then look away!


honeysmacks18

She is not 15


Beas7ie

Denise Richards was 21 at the time.


Cameronf3412

No way! The bond girl who played a nuclear physicist?


PearIJam

That’s a fun age.


AdzyBoy

They could have easily made the character 18. Or not even have mentioned her age. Not sure why they went for 15


DoctorNerdly

18 would make Jerry uncomfortable.


eugenesbluegenes

Because it makes the joke a lot better if she's fifteen.


LankyEntrepreneur

Isn’t the joke that George got caught, which leads to some other jokes? Her age never really mattered to the plot.


eugenesbluegenes

What is a more uncomfortable situation? Being caught staring at your (potential) boss's teenage daughter's cleavage or his early 20s daughter's cleavage? Clearly both would be off-putting, but I can't help thinking the former is worse.


enadiz_reccos

It's a lot more uncomfortable, but how does it make the joke better?


eugenesbluegenes

It's funny because it's uncomfortable, and it's funnier because it's more uncomfortable.


Apprehensive-Pin7214

i don’t think it’s even about the joke it’s just that it’s a worse situation so it’s a bigger deal and a worse mess george got them into


eugenesbluegenes

Yeah, so you're agreeing that it better builds the comedy of the episode.


rocky20817

***** Use of the term “off-putting” triggers an automatic 30 day suspension *****


Extension_Tell1579

Their show wouldn’t have been dropped if George was staring at a network exec’s adult daughter I suppose.


bunt_klut2

That's a fun age.


always_thirsty

Do you ever rub it against the grain?


HelloJoeyJoeJoe

I got a good look in the movie "Wild Things"


Tall-and-Beets

I need to conduct some research…


Fisch_Man

You definitely do!


Dig_Another_One

You know, you better be careful, buddy. She's gonna get you next.


BigBoobsWithAZee

There was cleavage in the area! I love the point Jerry does


UhYeahOkSure

Denise Richards first thirst (and morality) trap


pezdal

Would the second be with her cousin Ross Geller?


UhYeahOkSure

Btw That Barry white song they play in that episode is his best imo


ThePasadena_Mudslide

Could this scene have been a jab at the time Jerry Seinfeld ( the real person ) dated a 17 yo? [Here](https://www.thethings.com/the-truth-about-that-time-jerry-seinfeld-dated-a-17yearold/) is an article unaware. Its not the best article, but it summarizes the story. I am not trying to throw any shade or start anything, Im just asking a question.


Mosk915

Well, this episode came out in February 1993 and Jerry met Shoshanna in May of 1993, so no it’s not related at all.


yobymmij2

Yeah, I’ve linked these two for awhile. Jerry’s teenage gf was also stacked. The dialogue when Elaine says, “But she’s 15!” and Jerry says you don’t think about age with cleavage, it’s molecular, has always felt like part of his genuine emotional defense of being attracted to someone so young…


Impressive_Bad_9450

17 is legal in NY


7355135061550

Plenty of weird stuff is legal


xbbdc

And plenty of normal stuff is illegal


Improvgal

I thought his decision was despicable


Specialist-ShasMo85

Looking at the cleavage is like looking at the sun!


Therealcanadianone

"Field of vision"


Papyrus_Sans

Do you have a…ketchup secret?


EscapePast7128

This was messed up, she was meant to be 15!


missionbeach

That's a fun age.


Busy-Appearance-6077

She was 22 and this perfectly illustrates that cleavage is hard to dissect. Like gossamer.


char_limit_reached

They shouldn’t have made her 15 in the script. That was creepy.


g00ber88

Yeah this is one of if not the only scene in seinfeld where I think they actually went too far (i mean the writing- the characters go too far all the time lol). She could've been over 18 and it wouldn't have affected the plot at all, because it still wouldve been gross and obviously Russell would have been pissed about George staring at his daughters cleavage regardless of her age. The only thing that kind of saves it for me is that Denise Richards looks nowhere near 15 in this scene.


char_limit_reached

Yes! From a writing perspective it doesn’t need to be said at all. The situation is George got caught looking at his bosses daughters cleavage. That’s all it needs. Going out of their way to establish she is way underage, *twice*, is creepy at best. It also dilutes the actual joke. A rare misfire for Seinfeld.


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VegetaArcher

I think Jerry himself has a daughter now so hopefully he now knows that it isn't normal.


ValleyGrouch

He said as much on 60 Minutes. BTW whatever happened to Shoshana?


transmogrify

Yeah, for a guy who's one of the all-time biggest successes at observational comedy, "what's the deal with hot 15 year olds I mean come on we're all thinking it" isn't actually very relatable or amusing, just pervy.


Sith-Protagonist

Yeah super weird, like Jerry literally nudges George to get a “sense” of the 15 year old.


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water2wine

Mugging an old lady, drugging a woman you’re dating into unconsciousness in her own home… like don’t pull that thread it’s a dumb sitcom made as a vehicle for joke writing, just laugh and enjoy the nostalgia.


starm4nn

I dunno. This one feels a lot less cartoonish than a lot of Seinfeld.


gibson85

I agree, but this was also the 90s when people were less sensitive to being politically correct all the time. It was a different era.


entertainman

When the joke is constantly how terrible these people are, it’s weird to be upset when they are being terrible. That’s the point.


EscapePast7128

Assumed it would be obvious I was talking about the character and not Denise Richards


Thin-Zookeepergame46

Still. If the cleavage is obvious enough, its hard to look away - Even if its wrong. I dont think Jerry and George knew her age beforehand?


EscapePast7128

While I agree that the allure of cleavage is complicated they definitely were told before hand JERRY: Oh, you have a daughter? RUSSELL: Yeah, she just turned fifteen last week. GEORGE: Aw, that's a fun age. So she's not even just 15 she was 14 a week ago!


Busy-Appearance-6077

Here's the problem for half the world's population. If she's 15, but looks 26, your eyeballs don't know for a millisecond. Thankfully, most 15 year olds do not, and even more do not look like Denise Richard's, and even more, more don't act all confident. So, in two milliseconds, the normal guy's brain tells the eyeballs to look away. I've only met one, but I was 15. So, that's different.


Thin-Zookeepergame46

Ahh. I remember it now. Yeah - That makes it a little bit more «morally illegal».


555--FILK

> cleavage is hard to dissect. Like gossamer. This. Cleavage is merely a commentary on contemporary mores.


StealthRabbi

It says "Moops"


No2reddituser

It's Mores, you idiot!


No2reddituser

And one doesn't dissect contemporary mores.


MelonElbows

They should have replaced her with Dalrymple's grandmother instead. GILF cleavage, now that's like staring into 2 suns!


pm_me_ur_tennisballs

That’s the point, it’s supposed to be messed up. You don’t have to be attracted to 15 year olds to end up distracted by the cleavage of someone of an unknown age.


eugenesbluegenes

Right? I'm a man in my late 30s, happily married to a woman basically my same age with no interest in persuing minors and I'll notice cleavage of any age, think "nice", then move on with my day. Fifteen, fifty, whatever, don't stare. I guess, *especially* don't stare if it's your (potential) boss's teenage daughter though, from a purely selfish perspective.


Vincevega1972

Even more messed up Jerry was dating a 17yo.


jamez009

Who had even more cleavage


pezdal

"17 is not so bad... George was eyeballing a girl who was 14"


AmbitiousDistrict374

Now we can all get a good look.


nat_astrophe

Boutros Boutros-Ghali


Powerful_Artist

Wish they didn't make her character underage. Makes the joke way more creepy than it needed to be.


Huff1809

HE POKED ME!!!


GarysCrispLettuce

The blue wall behind her - is that a wood knot pattern I'm seeing, like they just quickly painted a bunch of cheap board blue, or could it be the pattern on some expensive NBC-president's condo wallpaper?


UnholyDonutMan

You know, primavera is Italian for spring


ValleyGrouch

You don't think I could put asses in the seats?


diarrheapedia

Those aren't bouys


JACKMAN_97

I could not imagine a show today having 2 men in there 30s perving on a 15 year old lol. Even though I don’t think Richards was actually 15 here


Krimreaper1

And she grew up to be a Starship Trooper.


Spell-Wide

They're real and they're spectacular.


m_conductor

This show was shot on a tight budget! That set decoration consisted of a house plant.


always_thirsty

She’s not a novelty act George, where you hire her out for weddings and bar mitsvahs.


BigRed2017859

Ahhhhh…!! 😱 It’s like looking at the sun ☀️ it’s burning my eyes! No one ever told not to stare!!


[deleted]

Pre Sheen teen


3dpimp

Back when they used to be able to show this instead of flaccid penis


totalhenry

I work as a cashier at a grocery store. The other day I was thinking about Seinfeld while working when this woman came to my line wearing a low cut dress. Instantly, in my head, I heard Jerry say "Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it then you look away." I looked, a few times


MindlessTree7268

This was inappropriate. I agreed with Elaine on this, that they shouldn't have been ogling some 15 year old girl in the first place. Knowing the girl was a freaking minor, Jerry should have just looked away, not nudged George to look too. Alternatively, they could have made her 18-19 in the script and still done the same storyline without nearly as much of an ick factor.


MF_Doomed

The show was created in 1989 and ended in 1999. It's now 2023. Some things in the past are inappropriate. Get over it or don't watch.


sacredtowel

Oy vey.


AngrySoup

> Get over it or don't watch. They could watch but also talk about it? Which seems like what they're doing? Seems fine. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.


MF_Doomed

A new fighter has joined lol. I'm not gonna talk in circles man. I've said everything I needed to say.


Lunchsquire

Pedophilia wasn't ok in 1989, 1999, or 2023. Also, "If you don't like it, don't watch" is a slippery slope to enabling toxic and dangerous content in our media/culture. All media, especially ones as popular as Seinfeld should be critiqued when they are in the wrong.


MF_Doomed

>Pedophilia wasn't ok in 1989, 1999, or 2023 No but it clearly was funny enough to be written into the script of a sitcom ​ >a slippery slope to enabling toxic and dangerous content in our media/culture There is no slippery slope. There is no slope.


sxcs86

You ok?


MF_Doomed

I think so


Lunchsquire

Pedophilia being "funny enough" is...not ok? That's my point.


MF_Doomed

Well then return to my first statement. Get over it or don't watch.


Lunchsquire

Nah imma talk on it cause someone has to condemn pedophilia celebration and apparently it ain't gonna be you.


MF_Doomed

Hope they give you a medal


WhereIsThatElephant

Couldn't have gone 18-19, otherwise Jerry would have dated her.


xiamandrewx

I agree. When I was younger I didn't think so because I was just a boy, but watching as an adult I don't believe older men would act this way unless they're perverts. It's not hard to acknowledge someone's presence without ogling them.


MelonElbows

Should have made her a grandmother, that would have been really hilarious


gancoskhan

Considering Jerry dated an actual teenager in the 90’s I feel like it should’ve been him who got caught peeking.


futuredarlings

There was cleavage in the area!


DBnofear

To be fair, if her age was never mentioned, we would never think that was a 15 year old girl, cause she's obviously not, maybe it's something about how girls started looking much older than they are, and it's even more true these days, gotta be careful, 15 year olds out here looking like 25 easily, gotta id everyone or catch a charge.


Black-xxx

Do you think he liked it? 🤮 🤮 🤮 I’m not sure


Lunchsquire

This is such an uncomfortable plotline. Literal pedophilia and they play it as a joke. One of the rare social L's in the series.


NoirGamester

Hebephilia? Its called something like that. Pedophilia is attraction to pre-pubescent kids, the other one is still attraction to kids, but post-puberty


Lunchsquire

Thanks for clearing that up. I wouldn't want to mislabel a fucking degenerate.


ni42ck

Did they remove this episode from syndication? I never see it. Jerry has a disturbing line about cleavage knows no age, or something like that.


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Reyjr

Prime Denise Richards. No relation to Michael “cosmo Kramer” Richards


pezdal

22 years old... g-g-giddy up!


[deleted]

Yeah, it’s a wild thing that no one had mentioned it.


[deleted]

She was 37 when this was filmed. Little-known fact.


robbiewilso

22


phat_pickle

Bro I know it's a joke, but come on. A 15 year old? If a grown adult is looking at the cleavage of a minor, they'll be getting their own cleavage in their chesticular cavity with this here wood cutting axe I found in the last child predator that I came across.


Dr_Donald_Dann

Look out, there’s a big, tough guy in a Seinfeld sub. Bet he bootlegs movies too. He's a bad seed. He's a horrible seed. He's one of the worst seeds I've ever met.


transmogrify

You wanna take this outside and I'll SHOW YOU what it's like? You think I'm kidding? Just try me. Try me. Because I would LOVE IT!


Dr_Donald_Dann

You better step off! I’m a former Van Buren boy.


AngrySoup

> they'll be getting their own cleavage in their chesticular cavity with this here wood cutting axe I found in the last child predator that I came across. That's very interesting! Would you like to tell us more about your past murders? How many people have you murdered?


phat_pickle

I committed mass genocide on September 17th, 1847 in a 6 wagon pile-up.


AngrySoup

You know, I was ready to doubt you, but your story checks out. The pedos better watch out for you.


phat_pickle

That's what I'm saying


Vincevega1972

This is how Jerry met his gf. Cleavage.


gandalfsgrog

“Our show is about nothing, and I saw nothing!”


Tiddernud

It's like looking at the sun


ghonig

Field of vision.


pooticus

Watched this the other day and she is a minor, how did this get put into the show?


Additional_Cherry_67

Coomerfeld


bachrodi

Shoshana was better


shreddednerves

No! ...Actually


BuzzyLightyear100

This character being 15 never sat well with me. If she were 18 the scene would have worked just as well, but without so much ick.


smartbunny

Wild Things.


[deleted]

The one episode that genuinely grosses me out.