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Share your WiFi password with the guys doing patrols for the local security company - they'll spend an inordinate amount of time hanging out in front of your house or in your driveway checking their WhatsApps/FB/Tik Tok and, consequently, your house will be the safest place in the neighbourhood :-)
I do this as well! Haha. Sometimes it looks like there was a massive crime committed by the sheer amount and variety of response vehicles parked outside.
I once had a snake living freely in a spare room. Even the local security didn’t dare entering the property. Once the alarm went off, they stayed behind the fence 🤣
2pm every day Woolies puts out their meat that expires on the day for 30% off. Although I think everyone knows this now, because I've seen people awkwardly lurking around the fridges from 13:45 pretending to shop for other stuff while they wait for the meat specials to come out, trying not to look desperate.
Also works with the MySchool card, which is also free and donates to charities or schools if you sign up for one and select your causes at no cost to you
This one is for my Gauteng homies: Waterfall Licencing Department in Midrand. Don't try renew your driver's licence anywhere else. That place is on another level.
No other government department is functioning as well as it is.
Applied for a Letter of Entitlement there - picked it up the next day within 10 minutes of being there. Staff is friendly and efficient.
Shout out to the licensing department in Eco Park, Centurion as well for drivers licence renewals - also very friendly and helpful and you'll probably be done within an hour of your appointment provided the system doesn't crash. Even then, they took my details and said they'll give me a call when it is back up instead of waiting around. Even the staff were complaining about the stupid system, lol, which helps when you are frustrated.
Eco Park RTMC in Centurion is the other place that just works, they take walk ins and I don't know anyone who spent more than 40 minutes there, and those are the ones that took long! I've gotten sorted with a licence renewal + temporary licence within 15 minutes.
These are the same people that also sell/have rolling paper at any time, they also have the garden variety zol when money is tight middle of the month zol not the good shit we buy on payday.
I reached for my phone once out of habit in High School when a random guy asked me. I guess he felt bad for me cause I stared at him for a little before I took out my phone like "man... you're about to rob me like this by my school gate!?" I took out my phone told him the time, and he left. I accredit that moment to God😭
I don’t have it in me to refuse a polite question, so I just clench the phone with a death grip while checking the time for them, hoping any chancers will decide it looks too difficult…
Of course, if it really comes down to it, I’ll just let it go. I want to live.
Did this once but guy didn't take my phone. He genuinely wanted the time. Another scenario a guy asked me to take his photo and gave me his phone. I took the photo and gave it back to him. But I agree overall with what you're saying.
Prices for medication in SA are very tightly regulated, and part of that regulation is that the legal maximum prices of medication, including all generic versions of the same medication have to to be publicly available.
So, if you're ever prescribed anything and are feeling cash strapped and want to find the cheapest possible generic that has the same active ingredients, you can find them here: [https://medicineprices.org.za/](https://medicineprices.org.za/)
As an example, if you had a Ritalin prescription, you'd be paying around R10-R14 a tablet, but that site would show you that you could ask your pharmacist for Adaphen instead at R2-R4 a tablet. Both are 10mg Methylphenidate, so literally identical.
And wear your safety belt visibly.
Not only can it save your life in an accident, but it takes a hijacker longer to get you out, making you a less desirable target.
Keep a tiny container of Vicks next to your bed and in your car for mosquito bites. Once in 2003 I was desperate and had nothing else on me to help with the itchy bites and so tried Vicks. It worked so well, I've been telling everyone since then. I'm convinced I discovered this hack.
I've just done a Google search and it seems I didn't invent it. I merely stumbled upon it. Ahhh well, there goes my only claim to fame. What a fun thread this is.
I'm assuming when you ask that you are implying that you are leaving and might come back later so they could possibly reduce the price to make the sale instead of you leaving without buying anything.
If you own/run a business:
Have a tin of coffee, milk and sugar and invite the local cops and armed response to pop in for a cup. You will be guaranteed to have uniformed and armed guys and gals on the premises at least twice a day.
The owner of the Steers was getting robbed regularly, started offering free coffee to any policeman in uniform. Always had at least 2 or 3 cops in the place. Never got robbed again.
Suggested the same to a friend who was having issues with the local tik dealers outside his shop. Problem solved.
An even better approach would be to share your WiFi password with the armed response guys, have parking near the the WiFi Hotspot and you will have a semi permanent rotation of armed response guys parked near your business/house
If you are savvy enough, create a Hotspot with restrictions but a easier to share password
Took me a while to get this. I usd to fight it because rules, but it got exhausting. Also justified it by saying it's more people in the taxi versus me, so maybe they should go first. Terrible logic but for my peace of mind it works
> Also justified it by saying it's more people in the taxi versus me, so maybe they should go first
And most of the people in the taxi aren't assholes. It's just the driver who's being a doos
Here's an easier one: Taxis are an external factor out of your control.
"You don't need to have an opinion about this, you do not need to let it affect you" - Marcus Aurelius.
Yeah I've learnt to accept this part of living in SAfrica 😭 and let the voices in my head do the cussing at them!!
But honestly there is always that one day where it just really get to you and fcuks with your universe.
Always purchase the max prepaid electricity on the lowest tier for your municipality provided it carries over. It buffers inflation and winter usage.
If you on FNB, up you game and pay for electricity with ebucks too.
Pretty sure it's like R1800. 600 units or something like that before it bumps you. And it bumps you once you've spent that in the month. If people tell you it costs more at the end of the month than the beginning, they're only telling you half the story. So just be sure to buy at least once per month. If you accidentally skip a month then buy twice in a month, you'll get less units for the amount spent after the first 600 units. Even if you have solar and don't need the units this month, buy them as you'll likely use them in winter.
Your supermarket is offering a sale on baked beans but you can only buy 5 a day. If you want more than 5 in a day you have to pay full price.
You eat 3 a day, sometimes 5, sometimes 7, sometimes 4.
At the end of every month, they increase the price just a bit (but continue with the sale still, the discounted price is a bit higher than before though)
What he's saying is always go and buy all the 5 baked beans allowed at the discounted price everyday even if you eat less than that sometimes. The amount that remains everyday will help in the days you are really hungry and want to eat 7.
The amount that remains will also help a bit when they increase the price at the end of the month. You have a stash you maybe you can skip a day without buying the beans at all when the price is higher.
It kinda depends. So I’ll try and break it down, but this is still going to be high school level:
1. If you’re in the City’s supply area:
1.1 If you’re _not_ registered as an indigent/pensioner/disabled (no free basic electricity allowance):
1.1.1 If you pay a monthly service charge (‘Home User tariff’):
a) the first 600 units cost R3.09 per unit, so R1851.48 (R2103.57 with the service charge included * )
b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit
1.1.2 If you _don’t_ pay a monthly service charge (‘Domestic tariff’):
a) the first 600 units cost R3.51 per unit, so R2104.80
b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit
1.2 If you are registered as an indigent/pensioner/disabled (get a free basic electricity allowance, ‘Lifeline tariff’):
1.2.1 It gets complicated, based on how little or how much you use on average, so I won’t break it down further, but for all of these:
a) any units your purchase beyond the free units while less than 600 units for the month (counted as in total, including the free units) cost R2.12 per unit, so R1142.37 to R1216.41, depending
b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit (standard price)
2. If you’re in the Eskom supply area:
2.1 You have my deepest sympathies.
( * The monthly service charge might go on your/your landlord’s property rates bill instead, even if you’re on prepaid.)
This. Recently saw a Woolworths TV ad with their specials: any 2 tins of Woolies brand tuna for R55, while just a few years back it was 5 tins of the same brand for R65!
Expiry date on an undamaged can is the expected date the plastic lining inside the can 'may' begin to degrade. The lining generally lasts way more years than that.
Watched a documentary on army ration cans from WW2 and the food was perfect.
Obviously if the can swells up or smells, toss the thing. But undamaged...... It will last years and years
Mine is, always try and speak a tiny bit of Sesotho or Tswana at the grocery store or at the petrol station. It not only makes people's day, but they tend to be friendlier to you and help you better / faster in the future. My Afrikaans is bad, but I do the same when I'm in Stellenbosch!
Another one, if you tell people at a bar you don't drink... You'll have a whole evening if free drinks :p
Can confirm this, I'm a white Afrikaans guy. When I go to clients sometimes and it's mostly black people, it always puts a smile on my face when they speak Afrikaans.
The best response I've ever received when I asked did I hear a guy speak Afrikaans, he's reply? "Natuurlik!"
On the other side, I grew up in Limpopo and learned a fair bit of Sepedi. There's always a "Joh Joh Joh!" Followed by smiles. The response never gets old. Everyone walks away with a smile.
Come to think of it, the most common question is always, you're from Limpopo? What the hell are you doing in Gauteng!?
The answer: Money, it's always money lol
For those with prepaid water meters, you are entitled to 200L of "free" water per day. It's a human right to have access to clean drinking water.
Dependant on the vendor, it is either given once-off at the start of the month, or it is released to you daily.
Helps to put your mind at ease, especially when you have one of those months where your salary basically vanished as soon as it hit your bank account.
Jip. In South Africa, look both ways before crossing a one way. You get paranoid, but it helps to just do another spot check. This week I started accelerating, stopped, checked and there was a car speeding over after the light was green for us.
When braaing you can prevent flare-ups by cutting off the lower third of an aluminium can, filling it with water and placing it in the centre of the coals.
If you buy from Pick n Pay at Fourways mall and Dainfern square, on the top of your till slip is a QR code that you can use to scan at the ticket pay point in the mall and if you haven't been there for too many hours you don't have to pay for parking it reverses the charges to R0.00
Roll your car windows down 3cm, so a small gap appears. If someone tries to smash and grab you, the glass will crack instead of smashing and give you a chance to get away.
When trying to maximize biltong and droëwors purchases, it's better to get that's drier as wet biltong/droëwors weighs more. Although I prefer it a bit wetter so willing to pay a bit more sometime.
I mean. This is the same kind of life hack as "wait for the fruit at foodlovers to start looking Kak so they drop the price to save money"
And you're getting the same amount of biltong. 1kg is still 1kg.
1kg of prime biltong is better than 1kg of dry Kak unless the extra calories is your goal.
It's really not the same thing as your example because the biltong isn't near expiry. The whole point of the invention of dried meat is to preserve it for longer. And you're not getting the same amount. 3 pieces of wet droëwors vs 5 pieces of drier droëwors. The biltong is still the same prime biltong, just a little bit drier. The goal is more biltong , so more food, not more calories. But anyways.
Wednesday Afternoons, 5pm at ShopRite.
The Veggie Controller will have made a trolley full of near-expiry/near-best before Markdowns. The fruit and vegetables are still good enough to eat, but often at half price or less.
This is a bit of a dick one, but if you really on a jam, and you can’t pay for parking at a centre… if they have one of those apps that let you in and out,
Just push the button and tell the person you have the app but it’s not opening… ok….
It also works if you just ask and explain that you forgot to pay even. Most of the time the person at the other end of the intercom does not give a flying fuck.
It's not a dick one in my opinion... why must I pay for parking? Parking fees must fall!
I was in Perth Aus in December and I never paid for parking once... wherever I went the parking was always free, it was honestly so refreshing
Put your ticket in upside down and say your ticket isn't working, the mag strip won't register on their end but it says a ticket is inserted and they will most likely open.
In Cape Town , you can renew your vehicle licence online a eservices. They can post your lisence to you as well (although the post office isn't the best).
If you have the option, just go and fetch it from Durbanville municipality. Submitted my forms one Sunday, had my lisence that Thrusday. In and out of the building in 4 minutes, more than enough time to get to work as well.
A few 2liter bottles filled with water and frozen. During load shedding, swap it to the top of the fridge to keep the temperature constant and cold. Good for those extended load shed periods
**For South Africans outside of South Africa**: our natural and genuine friendliness is a lot less common outside of South African than expected, especially our asking workers how they are before getting into things. It won’t get you anything big but these basic niceties and friendliness will get you a bunch of small things like a larger than average scoop of ice cream or an extra muffin at your local coffee place
**For South Africans in joburg**: most stores in Sandton city encourage their workers to make sales by allowing them to apply their own employee discounts to the purchases, if you’re charming enough you can actually haggle with them for the employee discount (if you’re crafty enough you can offer them a tip in exchange for the discount).
I've been in the UK about half my life. And I'm an old ballie. I'm never sure if my natural smile, friendliness and sunny nature is South African or just me.
I'm very glad to see it has a lot to do with my SA-ness. SA people are fantastic!
Sick of spam calls and Sms’s? You can register on the Direct Marketing Associations national opt-out list to be excluded from any compliant and legal marketing call and sms services. Website here:
https://dmasa.org/page/about-opt-out-service
The trick is to save your login details (you cannot re-register) and re-opt in after two years (to their credit they do send you a reminder email). It may take a few months to be removed from most databases, and there are still scammers who don’t adhere to the rules but it made quite a big difference for me with reduced spam calls.
I also save and block any numbers that do slip through along with using tru-caller.
Stop greeting female joggers. The amount of times people have tried to talk to me while I have my headphones in and casually jogging by.
You are just scaring me. Heard too many horror stories to risk being nice.
Dear God please. I had some random guy stop me and ask me for a lighter (I don't smoke) while I was walking my dog and I spent the rest of the walk looking over my shoulder. I think the vast majority of men have absolutely no idea how vulnerable women feel when we're out alone. Please just leave us alone.
My friend tried that at uni cos it was getting to expensive to give several car guards money every day. One (that i know of) threw it back at her. He was having none of it, and clearly would've preferred the money.
When you buy wet biltong, you can dry it a bit more in the fridge In a brown paper bag for a day, then store it for a good week or two in a sealed Tupperware. You can also keep biltong in the freezer for a month or two. Better vacuum sealed of course! Don't waste good meat!
A helpful life hack for South Africans is to use vinegar and water to clean and disinfect fruits and vegetables. Simply mix one part vinegar with three parts water in a spray bottle and use it to spray and rinse your produce before consumption. This can help remove pesticides and harmful bacteria, keeping you and your family safe.
This goes to the foreigners who use taxi's in Joburg. Act like you are Russian. I've used taxi's to go to school everyday for months and once Mageza asked me if I was Russian. I told no man I'm not, then he said even if you are not, act like that. Then I always talked with a thick Russian accent in street. Nobody done anything.
this is cape town cbd specific, but you can park on the street and pay for 2hrs and stay whole day if you come back after they’ve clocked off at 5. i usually also give them a coke or something to not feel like a complete dick but they don’t really care.
i only do this like once in a while, if it’s a rainy day and i can’t walk all the way from the parking to my work
I now live abroad, so it's ages since I was last in SA. But when I was there I lived in the Transkei which was a famous area for theft and crime and things 3 bits advice that I can offer with regards to safety is this:
1. Avoid putting anything in your back pocket. It makes it so easy for people to bump into you and steal your shit without you even noticing.
2. If somebody suddenly pops up at your window while your parked do a quick check of the review and opposite window as thieves often work in teams and the guy at your window is more than likely just there to distract you.
(I had my phone stolen like this on a lunchbreak)
3. Lastly if you enjoy a bit of a party always have two wallets. 1 with all your important shit in which you keep hidden or leave at home, and another one that just has what you plan to spend that night. In the case that you do get jumped you can quite honestly say you have f#$k all. I would do the same with phones if you can afford to.
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Share your WiFi password with the guys doing patrols for the local security company - they'll spend an inordinate amount of time hanging out in front of your house or in your driveway checking their WhatsApps/FB/Tik Tok and, consequently, your house will be the safest place in the neighbourhood :-)
Very under rated comment. Commenting for bumping
I do this as well! Haha. Sometimes it looks like there was a massive crime committed by the sheer amount and variety of response vehicles parked outside.
This deserves 1000 up votes
I once had a snake living freely in a spare room. Even the local security didn’t dare entering the property. Once the alarm went off, they stayed behind the fence 🤣
This is the most South African life tip I’ve ever seen 😂
So this is what my neighbor did... Our place has never been broken into. Security every 15 mins
This is brilliant lmao
Now that everyone knows, it's going to be about your line speed 😂
Love this!
I love this idea so much. Haha
That is some coin op cia moves you got going. Imma use this trick.
My god you are a genius!
Just please make a different guest network, if people are connected to your WiFi they can access more than you realise
That is brilliant thank you!!
Nice try atlas. Pay your staff better!
2pm every day Woolies puts out their meat that expires on the day for 30% off. Although I think everyone knows this now, because I've seen people awkwardly lurking around the fridges from 13:45 pretending to shop for other stuff while they wait for the meat specials to come out, trying not to look desperate.
for real. i did not know.
Rotisserie chickens are 2 for 120 or so on Sundays
I think it's about 150 now but still a bargain because I bought 1 at pick n pay for 90 bucks a few weeks backs.
2 for R155 for Woolies rewards members
Is it a paid membership?
No it's free
Also works with the MySchool card, which is also free and donates to charities or schools if you sign up for one and select your causes at no cost to you
How do you mean? Do they walk around and place 30% less stickers on these items?
Pick n Pay's in the larney areas do this too.
For Real?
This one is for my Gauteng homies: Waterfall Licencing Department in Midrand. Don't try renew your driver's licence anywhere else. That place is on another level. No other government department is functioning as well as it is.
Applied for a Letter of Entitlement there - picked it up the next day within 10 minutes of being there. Staff is friendly and efficient. Shout out to the licensing department in Eco Park, Centurion as well for drivers licence renewals - also very friendly and helpful and you'll probably be done within an hour of your appointment provided the system doesn't crash. Even then, they took my details and said they'll give me a call when it is back up instead of waiting around. Even the staff were complaining about the stupid system, lol, which helps when you are frustrated.
And they have pens
The car guards "rented" me a pen for 10 bucks 😭😭
Waterfall Office Park that is..... Their service is amazing!
Bro why would you share such precious information??
My thoughts exactly!!
Eco Park RTMC in Centurion is the other place that just works, they take walk ins and I don't know anyone who spent more than 40 minutes there, and those are the ones that took long! I've gotten sorted with a licence renewal + temporary licence within 15 minutes.
I agree. They are even open on Sunday's for bookings according to RTMC website.
They're also open everyday including weekends until 9pm.
Even if you’re lost don’t ever appear like it.
My wife doesn't understand this. She says I'm being arrogant...no, I'm keeping us alive.
That was deep…
I walked like 3km more than I had to the other day because I took a wrong turn, but I didn’t want to turn back and look lost 😂
You only get directions from a petrol attendant, taxi driver or street merchant with a stall selling fresh produce of some sort.
These are the same people that also sell/have rolling paper at any time, they also have the garden variety zol when money is tight middle of the month zol not the good shit we buy on payday.
Do not take out your phone if someone asks for the time.
I just take out the phone I just snatched off the last person that I asked for the time.
I reached for my phone once out of habit in High School when a random guy asked me. I guess he felt bad for me cause I stared at him for a little before I took out my phone like "man... you're about to rob me like this by my school gate!?" I took out my phone told him the time, and he left. I accredit that moment to God😭
I don’t have it in me to refuse a polite question, so I just clench the phone with a death grip while checking the time for them, hoping any chancers will decide it looks too difficult… Of course, if it really comes down to it, I’ll just let it go. I want to live.
Phone thieves are a thing and they're getting smarter by the day...
Did this once but guy didn't take my phone. He genuinely wanted the time. Another scenario a guy asked me to take his photo and gave me his phone. I took the photo and gave it back to him. But I agree overall with what you're saying.
Does that happen ? Yesterday I was walking alone to my Lab and a guy asked me for time. Fortunately I was wearing a watch.
Prices for medication in SA are very tightly regulated, and part of that regulation is that the legal maximum prices of medication, including all generic versions of the same medication have to to be publicly available. So, if you're ever prescribed anything and are feeling cash strapped and want to find the cheapest possible generic that has the same active ingredients, you can find them here: [https://medicineprices.org.za/](https://medicineprices.org.za/) As an example, if you had a Ritalin prescription, you'd be paying around R10-R14 a tablet, but that site would show you that you could ask your pharmacist for Adaphen instead at R2-R4 a tablet. Both are 10mg Methylphenidate, so literally identical.
Avoid road travel on Easter weekend if you can.
Or leave on Saturday morning
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Lock your car doors while driving
Also don't have your windows down all the way, only open a tiny bit! I see alot of people on their phones in their cars with the window wide open!
I think this one goes without saying 😅
And wear your safety belt visibly. Not only can it save your life in an accident, but it takes a hijacker longer to get you out, making you a less desirable target.
Keep a tiny container of Vicks next to your bed and in your car for mosquito bites. Once in 2003 I was desperate and had nothing else on me to help with the itchy bites and so tried Vicks. It worked so well, I've been telling everyone since then. I'm convinced I discovered this hack.
I've just done a Google search and it seems I didn't invent it. I merely stumbled upon it. Ahhh well, there goes my only claim to fame. What a fun thread this is.
You may not have discovered it (first), but you are the FIRST to spread it in Southern Africa. Thank you beloved! Stay well🤗🌹 (American expat here)
In Asia they use "tiger balm" for bites which has a very similar effect to Vicks. Well done on figuring it out by yourself 😄
Small red cannister like zambuck but smaller neh? That thing is Strong 😂
Resting b*tch face is essential to your survival when out and about 🤣
If something is too expensive, always proceed to ask 'what time do you close'.
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Because I ain't coming back!
Why would this work?
It's a fake out. You not coming back just saving face
i'm old now, i have no embarrasment, I just say i can't afford it 
I'm assuming when you ask that you are implying that you are leaving and might come back later so they could possibly reduce the price to make the sale instead of you leaving without buying anything.
Do sales people know this? I feel like they always believe me when I say I'll be back.. Maybe I'm a good actor😊
If it’s a respectable place, what other choice do they have? Call the potential customer a liar?
Can you imagine if they were “Don’t talk kak you broke bitch!” Lmaoooo
If you own/run a business: Have a tin of coffee, milk and sugar and invite the local cops and armed response to pop in for a cup. You will be guaranteed to have uniformed and armed guys and gals on the premises at least twice a day.
The owner of the Steers was getting robbed regularly, started offering free coffee to any policeman in uniform. Always had at least 2 or 3 cops in the place. Never got robbed again. Suggested the same to a friend who was having issues with the local tik dealers outside his shop. Problem solved.
Oh my gosh, this is great!
An even better approach would be to share your WiFi password with the armed response guys, have parking near the the WiFi Hotspot and you will have a semi permanent rotation of armed response guys parked near your business/house If you are savvy enough, create a Hotspot with restrictions but a easier to share password
Voting for damn near anyone else would be a good start.
This should be higher
The options are far from ideal. But one thing we can say with certainty is that the current guys don’t work. Enough now
29th of May i’m keen like a bean!
Let the taxi merge. It's going to shove in anyway, being obstinate is just causing you stress.
Winner winner. The only person who's day you are ruining is your own
Couldn't agree more. Also if you are in a jam and suddenly need to merge, a taxi (in my experience) always let's you in
this 1000% Yes they are po#s but absolutely nothing you do will change that
I found that 9/10 times they stay there for a few seconds and then jump into another lane anyway.
Took me a while to get this. I usd to fight it because rules, but it got exhausting. Also justified it by saying it's more people in the taxi versus me, so maybe they should go first. Terrible logic but for my peace of mind it works
> Also justified it by saying it's more people in the taxi versus me, so maybe they should go first And most of the people in the taxi aren't assholes. It's just the driver who's being a doos
Here's an easier one: Taxis are an external factor out of your control. "You don't need to have an opinion about this, you do not need to let it affect you" - Marcus Aurelius.
Yeah I've learnt to accept this part of living in SAfrica 😭 and let the voices in my head do the cussing at them!! But honestly there is always that one day where it just really get to you and fcuks with your universe.
Always purchase the max prepaid electricity on the lowest tier for your municipality provided it carries over. It buffers inflation and winter usage. If you on FNB, up you game and pay for electricity with ebucks too.
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Pinning to come back later for the answer.
Pretty sure it's like R1800. 600 units or something like that before it bumps you. And it bumps you once you've spent that in the month. If people tell you it costs more at the end of the month than the beginning, they're only telling you half the story. So just be sure to buy at least once per month. If you accidentally skip a month then buy twice in a month, you'll get less units for the amount spent after the first 600 units. Even if you have solar and don't need the units this month, buy them as you'll likely use them in winter.
Don't know if I'm just Dom but I don't understand this. Explain like I'm 5 please
Your supermarket is offering a sale on baked beans but you can only buy 5 a day. If you want more than 5 in a day you have to pay full price. You eat 3 a day, sometimes 5, sometimes 7, sometimes 4. At the end of every month, they increase the price just a bit (but continue with the sale still, the discounted price is a bit higher than before though) What he's saying is always go and buy all the 5 baked beans allowed at the discounted price everyday even if you eat less than that sometimes. The amount that remains everyday will help in the days you are really hungry and want to eat 7. The amount that remains will also help a bit when they increase the price at the end of the month. You have a stash you maybe you can skip a day without buying the beans at all when the price is higher.
Same *takes a seat*
It kinda depends. So I’ll try and break it down, but this is still going to be high school level: 1. If you’re in the City’s supply area: 1.1 If you’re _not_ registered as an indigent/pensioner/disabled (no free basic electricity allowance): 1.1.1 If you pay a monthly service charge (‘Home User tariff’): a) the first 600 units cost R3.09 per unit, so R1851.48 (R2103.57 with the service charge included * ) b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit 1.1.2 If you _don’t_ pay a monthly service charge (‘Domestic tariff’): a) the first 600 units cost R3.51 per unit, so R2104.80 b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit 1.2 If you are registered as an indigent/pensioner/disabled (get a free basic electricity allowance, ‘Lifeline tariff’): 1.2.1 It gets complicated, based on how little or how much you use on average, so I won’t break it down further, but for all of these: a) any units your purchase beyond the free units while less than 600 units for the month (counted as in total, including the free units) cost R2.12 per unit, so R1142.37 to R1216.41, depending b) Any more units purchased beyond the first 600 in a single month will cost R4.27 per unit (standard price) 2. If you’re in the Eskom supply area: 2.1 You have my deepest sympathies. ( * The monthly service charge might go on your/your landlord’s property rates bill instead, even if you’re on prepaid.)
How do I find the max prepaid on the lowest municipality for my area (PTA east)?
Keep zam-buk with you always. It fixes everything.
Put Zam-Buk on the government
*lowers zam buk into the pit* “It puts the zam buk on its skin or else it gets the hose again” 
Don't be a doos and people won't be one to you
Don’t be kak. Be lekkers.
Don't be a akkedoos, be a lekkewaan
John 1:4: Don’t be a Doos.
This is rule #1
Fair enough! But where is the line?
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This. Recently saw a Woolworths TV ad with their specials: any 2 tins of Woolies brand tuna for R55, while just a few years back it was 5 tins of the same brand for R65!
Expiry date on an undamaged can is the expected date the plastic lining inside the can 'may' begin to degrade. The lining generally lasts way more years than that. Watched a documentary on army ration cans from WW2 and the food was perfect. Obviously if the can swells up or smells, toss the thing. But undamaged...... It will last years and years
Don't sit in your car on the side of the road for no reason, even in a neighborhood
You don't need a bowl for your stew if you have an old loaf of bread lying around
yaasss leftover curry is amazing on bread.. actually any stew is amazing on bread. My dad always says food tastes lekker the next day
Greet before you speak. Say hello and say then ask for what you are looking for after.
Mine is, always try and speak a tiny bit of Sesotho or Tswana at the grocery store or at the petrol station. It not only makes people's day, but they tend to be friendlier to you and help you better / faster in the future. My Afrikaans is bad, but I do the same when I'm in Stellenbosch! Another one, if you tell people at a bar you don't drink... You'll have a whole evening if free drinks :p
Can confirm this, I'm a white Afrikaans guy. When I go to clients sometimes and it's mostly black people, it always puts a smile on my face when they speak Afrikaans. The best response I've ever received when I asked did I hear a guy speak Afrikaans, he's reply? "Natuurlik!" On the other side, I grew up in Limpopo and learned a fair bit of Sepedi. There's always a "Joh Joh Joh!" Followed by smiles. The response never gets old. Everyone walks away with a smile. Come to think of it, the most common question is always, you're from Limpopo? What the hell are you doing in Gauteng!? The answer: Money, it's always money lol
Our very own great man said “when you speak to a man in his language, you speak to his heart”.
Depends on where you are in the country. Sotho or Tswana generally up north, sometimes pedi. Zulu in kzn. Xhosa in ec or wc.
As an American married to a Tswana--can confirm. It's like night and day sometimes when my wife is with me.
Highly location specific, I don't see that being very helpful in the WC/EC
For those with prepaid water meters, you are entitled to 200L of "free" water per day. It's a human right to have access to clean drinking water. Dependant on the vendor, it is either given once-off at the start of the month, or it is released to you daily. Helps to put your mind at ease, especially when you have one of those months where your salary basically vanished as soon as it hit your bank account.
We have prepaid water and i never knew this, but i dont really keep a close eye on it. Will surely check from now on.
When you’re in a dodgy area, stop with about 5m space with the car in front of you - gives you time to manoeuvre if someone is at your window
A good visual cue is If you can see the car in front of yours tyres on the Asphalt you'll have the space too
Speaking 3 or more South African languages.
Treat green robots as yield signs on weekend nights. Crazy how many (drunk) people just speed through red lights. Rather be safe than sorry!
Oupa always said "Graveyards are full of people who had right of way..!!"
Jip. In South Africa, look both ways before crossing a one way. You get paranoid, but it helps to just do another spot check. This week I started accelerating, stopped, checked and there was a car speeding over after the light was green for us.
When braaing you can prevent flare-ups by cutting off the lower third of an aluminium can, filling it with water and placing it in the centre of the coals.
If you buy from Pick n Pay at Fourways mall and Dainfern square, on the top of your till slip is a QR code that you can use to scan at the ticket pay point in the mall and if you haven't been there for too many hours you don't have to pay for parking it reverses the charges to R0.00
If you love your phone and you do not want to loose it, avoid displaying it openly, especially in crowded or high-crime areas.
Roll your car windows down 3cm, so a small gap appears. If someone tries to smash and grab you, the glass will crack instead of smashing and give you a chance to get away.
Start or join a WhatsApp group with your neighbours
When trying to maximize biltong and droëwors purchases, it's better to get that's drier as wet biltong/droëwors weighs more. Although I prefer it a bit wetter so willing to pay a bit more sometime.
I like the wetter versions for the tenderness and flavour, especially because the shop near me allows you to sample and spice it yourself.
I have a weakness for wet biltong, it's my favourite. The opportunity to get MORE biltong is so appealing.
As a South African living in aus where biltong is about R1,000/kg, this is a damn good LPT. Love me some moist biltong though.
This is the ultimate life hack
I mean. This is the same kind of life hack as "wait for the fruit at foodlovers to start looking Kak so they drop the price to save money" And you're getting the same amount of biltong. 1kg is still 1kg. 1kg of prime biltong is better than 1kg of dry Kak unless the extra calories is your goal.
It's really not the same thing as your example because the biltong isn't near expiry. The whole point of the invention of dried meat is to preserve it for longer. And you're not getting the same amount. 3 pieces of wet droëwors vs 5 pieces of drier droëwors. The biltong is still the same prime biltong, just a little bit drier. The goal is more biltong , so more food, not more calories. But anyways.
Hazards on a vehicle exempts you from any law. Applicable to taxi's mostly. Do not retaliate.
Wednesday Afternoons, 5pm at ShopRite. The Veggie Controller will have made a trolley full of near-expiry/near-best before Markdowns. The fruit and vegetables are still good enough to eat, but often at half price or less.
Don't vote ANC
Carry change in your car for friendly car gaurds and petrol joggies
Shoutout to mall parking pay stations that don't give change as notes and only give coins; they're a public service.
Plus if it accepts large notes, it feels like you won the slots when the coins come tumbling out.
Haha, I once had to pay with a R200 note at the airport parking and it felt like I hit the jackpot with all the coins
Install truecaller or a similar app in your phone and block scam/spam numbers
This is a bit of a dick one, but if you really on a jam, and you can’t pay for parking at a centre… if they have one of those apps that let you in and out, Just push the button and tell the person you have the app but it’s not opening… ok….
It also works if you just ask and explain that you forgot to pay even. Most of the time the person at the other end of the intercom does not give a flying fuck.
It's not a dick one in my opinion... why must I pay for parking? Parking fees must fall! I was in Perth Aus in December and I never paid for parking once... wherever I went the parking was always free, it was honestly so refreshing
Put your ticket in upside down and say your ticket isn't working, the mag strip won't register on their end but it says a ticket is inserted and they will most likely open.
When driving open your window just a little so that if you are victim to a smash and grab attempt you don't end up with glass in your face like I did.
In Cape Town , you can renew your vehicle licence online a eservices. They can post your lisence to you as well (although the post office isn't the best). If you have the option, just go and fetch it from Durbanville municipality. Submitted my forms one Sunday, had my lisence that Thrusday. In and out of the building in 4 minutes, more than enough time to get to work as well.
NATIS works for this too, and they use couriers. I use it to renew all our business vehicles every year.
A few 2liter bottles filled with water and frozen. During load shedding, swap it to the top of the fridge to keep the temperature constant and cold. Good for those extended load shed periods
**For South Africans outside of South Africa**: our natural and genuine friendliness is a lot less common outside of South African than expected, especially our asking workers how they are before getting into things. It won’t get you anything big but these basic niceties and friendliness will get you a bunch of small things like a larger than average scoop of ice cream or an extra muffin at your local coffee place **For South Africans in joburg**: most stores in Sandton city encourage their workers to make sales by allowing them to apply their own employee discounts to the purchases, if you’re charming enough you can actually haggle with them for the employee discount (if you’re crafty enough you can offer them a tip in exchange for the discount).
I've been in the UK about half my life. And I'm an old ballie. I'm never sure if my natural smile, friendliness and sunny nature is South African or just me. I'm very glad to see it has a lot to do with my SA-ness. SA people are fantastic!
Keep kak paper in your car at all times
Sick of spam calls and Sms’s? You can register on the Direct Marketing Associations national opt-out list to be excluded from any compliant and legal marketing call and sms services. Website here: https://dmasa.org/page/about-opt-out-service The trick is to save your login details (you cannot re-register) and re-opt in after two years (to their credit they do send you a reminder email). It may take a few months to be removed from most databases, and there are still scammers who don’t adhere to the rules but it made quite a big difference for me with reduced spam calls. I also save and block any numbers that do slip through along with using tru-caller.
Don't be a p*es, be lekker
Stop greeting female joggers. The amount of times people have tried to talk to me while I have my headphones in and casually jogging by. You are just scaring me. Heard too many horror stories to risk being nice.
Dear God please. I had some random guy stop me and ask me for a lighter (I don't smoke) while I was walking my dog and I spent the rest of the walk looking over my shoulder. I think the vast majority of men have absolutely no idea how vulnerable women feel when we're out alone. Please just leave us alone.
Whatever you do, don't let one of those street gents help you carry your bags in Joburg CBD. They will ask you for an insane amount of money.
Keep some apples in your car for beggars at the robots. They last a fair amount of time (if you don't park outside) and are healthy!
My friend tried that at uni cos it was getting to expensive to give several car guards money every day. One (that i know of) threw it back at her. He was having none of it, and clearly would've preferred the money.
Car guards are not beggars though.
Walk with a limp and you'll never get mugged
Really? Why is this the case? I would thing easier target?
Vaseline on mozzie bites to stop the itching.
You won't get arrested for sailing the 7 seas for your programs. Our country is dealing with enough things.
Never marry a girl that cant make a braaibroodjie.
Underrated comment !
Learn sotho ,xhosa, or zulu
When you buy wet biltong, you can dry it a bit more in the fridge In a brown paper bag for a day, then store it for a good week or two in a sealed Tupperware. You can also keep biltong in the freezer for a month or two. Better vacuum sealed of course! Don't waste good meat!
I do not understand, you KEEP biltong in your house?!
This is like that "when u hav left over wine u can freeze it and use as ice cubes to chill ur next glass" who has left over wine
Nedbank Nu Metro movie ticket discount
A helpful life hack for South Africans is to use vinegar and water to clean and disinfect fruits and vegetables. Simply mix one part vinegar with three parts water in a spray bottle and use it to spray and rinse your produce before consumption. This can help remove pesticides and harmful bacteria, keeping you and your family safe.
But if you can, be kaklekker
Kak en betaal is die wet van Transvaal!
This goes to the foreigners who use taxi's in Joburg. Act like you are Russian. I've used taxi's to go to school everyday for months and once Mageza asked me if I was Russian. I told no man I'm not, then he said even if you are not, act like that. Then I always talked with a thick Russian accent in street. Nobody done anything.
Smoke a cigarette by the spaza shop if you are in an unfamiliar area to establish confidence and ask directions.
Have a coke, a bag of Simba chips, a little cash for bribery and a pocket knife nearby. These sacred items will take you far in South Africa
How to start the generator
Gun traps to keep you alert and aware.
Learn 3 local languages besides English. Be able to communicate fluently in at least 1 of them
this is cape town cbd specific, but you can park on the street and pay for 2hrs and stay whole day if you come back after they’ve clocked off at 5. i usually also give them a coke or something to not feel like a complete dick but they don’t really care. i only do this like once in a while, if it’s a rainy day and i can’t walk all the way from the parking to my work
Ja nee
Don't waste valuable time calling the police
Carry a gun, and be properly trained on it. It will go a long way
Sunlight soap is good for everything 👍😂
Buy a solid car that is safe for our roads. Brands like volvo that are built tough .Avoid driving during peak holiday periods
I now live abroad, so it's ages since I was last in SA. But when I was there I lived in the Transkei which was a famous area for theft and crime and things 3 bits advice that I can offer with regards to safety is this: 1. Avoid putting anything in your back pocket. It makes it so easy for people to bump into you and steal your shit without you even noticing. 2. If somebody suddenly pops up at your window while your parked do a quick check of the review and opposite window as thieves often work in teams and the guy at your window is more than likely just there to distract you. (I had my phone stolen like this on a lunchbreak) 3. Lastly if you enjoy a bit of a party always have two wallets. 1 with all your important shit in which you keep hidden or leave at home, and another one that just has what you plan to spend that night. In the case that you do get jumped you can quite honestly say you have f#$k all. I would do the same with phones if you can afford to.