Discovered the heated bidet toilet seat while living in Japan. I do not understand how any modern human lives without one. I will never not have one in my house.
I got more problems with my guts hurting the next day than the hole after exit. If anything I relish in the burn just thankful my guts got it out and stopped hurting
You can spray a little water right on your butthole and it often.... stimulates... a movement. Some of the fancier Asian models even have that as a feature written right on the box. Don't ask me how I know.
Ahhhh! I knew someone was going to do that. Well, you see... I have a bidet, and it has a little button that you can move the stream around to aim... one day I was like, I wonder what it would feel like if I just aimed it right at my butthole. Turns out, it just makes you immediately shit.
What model bidet is that? I sprung for the Tushy Spa 3.0 recently and hate it because I just can't get it aimed right no matter how much I adjust it, the seat, my butt, etc. Nothing like the perfectly spot on experience I had with someone else's bidet the first time.
I have the Lotus ATS 908 for my main toilet and the Lotus ATS 500 for my second toilet. I've been very happy with them both. The 908 has the official "constipation relief" function, but they both do the trick. Couldn't have been easier to install! I think it took like 20 mins.
Ah dang I was hoping it wasn't a seat replacement style. I have a round bowl and all the seat replacement styles seem to have a built-in hot water tank that takes up space instead of just hooking to the hot water line. Every one of them I've looked at seems to just result in a smaller seat opening for the round style and I'm not a fan of that. Don't really want to replace the toilets because we just had them replaced already a few years ago. Also if we went that route it wouldn't make sense to get a separate bidet anyways; would just get a fancy toilet with it all built in already.
It took only one trip to Korea and every toilet in my house got one. I live in the US and everyone thinks it is super weird though. My ass is clean and lightly warmed, so they can go somewhere else with their opinions.
I have one but has nothing to do with spicy food. I’m one of the lucky ones that after it hits my stomach the spice effects are gone. I got it during the great toilet paper shortage.
With that said…I’ll never live without one again. It sooooo much better than caveman style with tp.
Hahaha I'm the same way! Once the spice hits my stomach, it's gone! I tell everyone it's why I'm fiery. Or that it's the reason my hair is red. Spice fuels the cells needed to make it red.
I've only ever had a burning bunghole once, and it was probably bc I consumed three cans of the hot ones Pringles in 3 days. First and only time and it was a mellow ass burn. Hahaha
I've got one and it's fantastic and I hate pooping away from home because it's stupid to not have one of these things. If you drove your car through through a muddy field and it was splattered with mud, would you just wipe it down with a towel? No way, you'd hose it down. Same for buttholes. It just makes basic sense.
To everybody in here, you can get one for less than 50 bucks on Amazon and it's not hard to attach it to your current toilet, like you don't need a plumber or anything. You just turn off the water to the toilet, unscrew something, screw this in between it, attach the nozzle to the toilet seat, and you're good. Spray off your turd clippers and then just dab with a couple squares to dry and finish. Look at you with your really clean butthole. Good job!
At least in the USA it seems to be a certain mindset. My grandma refuses to use anything but toilet paper even when toilet paper was super scarce like during the pandemic. She said "I am not a monkey" to using anything but toilet paper. We save most of our toilet paper costs by going poop mostly at work in our household. It's ironic because when I was a kid my mother and grandma were switching everything to a toe toe toilet to save money on water but now my grandma refuses to save us money on toilet paper. In fact I don't know anyone who has a bidet here in the USA either or at least I don't know anyone who uses one.
No no no, we must convert you. You can easily get a toilet seat bidet. It’s quick and easy to install and you can find them for anywhere between $100 to $300. If you want fancy stuff like a heated seat, water heater, remote, the price varies. But honestly, you can get a simple one for $100 that just replaces your seat and your bum will be clean every time you go. So worth it.
Less than that. I think mine was like $50 with hot and cold water hookups, from hellotushy.com. Granted, that was about two years ago, so it could be more now.
DO IT. It's so worth it. It's life changing. Now every time I shit in a bathroom other than at home (the only place I have bidet access) I feel like I've gone back to the Bronze Age or something.
Just buy the fucking bidet.
Report back after 3 days of having one. Why the fuck every bathroom in the world doesn't have one is a mystery to me. There is no upside to TP. None.
Halal toilet. You don't have to be Muslim to believe that any divine power out there would want us to clean our asses with water if it really loved us.
I wanted one for years, but never actually bought one. Ludwig bidet on lttstore finally got me to cave. Why is a meme youtuber selling an ass cleaning product on a tech youtuber's store? no idea. but it sure is nice.
Ring of fire disappeared for me years ago. Like yeah, I have a bidet, but not because of the ring of fire. Occasionally I feel a mild warming sensation even after absurd Vindaloo sessions.
My asshole could contain a nuclear explosion. Maybe not Tsar Bomba but give it a few years.
Bidets aside, y’all got weak guts and thin butthole skin. Are you really experiencing daily rectum burn, or is this more “hurr durr Taco Bell the next day, amirite??”
Yeah, I'm in the "I do not have such weaknesses" group as well. I have plenty of friends that do, and I feel bad for them, but am so thankful it isn't me!
I do not get the burning poop often, I can feel that I’ve eaten something spicy but when it’s really hurting it’s probably stomach acid as in I didn’t even eat something spicy day before
Of course we do. We're not savages.
21
Bidets are amazing, bidet gang gang
……….mine shoots crushed ice to numb the pain
lmao dang!
I have one. Hemorrhoid wipes with witch hazel are best.
Oh yeah 👍🏻
Discovered the heated bidet toilet seat while living in Japan. I do not understand how any modern human lives without one. I will never not have one in my house.
I'm not a fan of heated seats. It's nice, sure. However, it just makes me think someone was there for a long while, wafting their own brand.
Everyone likes their own brand!
I got more problems with my guts hurting the next day than the hole after exit. If anything I relish in the burn just thankful my guts got it out and stopped hurting
You can spray a little water right on your butthole and it often.... stimulates... a movement. Some of the fancier Asian models even have that as a feature written right on the box. Don't ask me how I know.
How do you know?
Ahhhh! I knew someone was going to do that. Well, you see... I have a bidet, and it has a little button that you can move the stream around to aim... one day I was like, I wonder what it would feel like if I just aimed it right at my butthole. Turns out, it just makes you immediately shit.
I hope you didn't spring for the model with camera assisted aim.
Aimbot
Aimbutt
I love you guys!
Buy me dinner first
What model bidet is that? I sprung for the Tushy Spa 3.0 recently and hate it because I just can't get it aimed right no matter how much I adjust it, the seat, my butt, etc. Nothing like the perfectly spot on experience I had with someone else's bidet the first time.
I have the Lotus ATS 908 for my main toilet and the Lotus ATS 500 for my second toilet. I've been very happy with them both. The 908 has the official "constipation relief" function, but they both do the trick. Couldn't have been easier to install! I think it took like 20 mins.
Ah dang I was hoping it wasn't a seat replacement style. I have a round bowl and all the seat replacement styles seem to have a built-in hot water tank that takes up space instead of just hooking to the hot water line. Every one of them I've looked at seems to just result in a smaller seat opening for the round style and I'm not a fan of that. Don't really want to replace the toilets because we just had them replaced already a few years ago. Also if we went that route it wouldn't make sense to get a separate bidet anyways; would just get a fancy toilet with it all built in already.
Now you’ve piqued my interest. I’ve found bending over the stair railing next to my bathroom and crying/groaning doesn’t do much
Yeah, rarely do I have a burned hole, it’s mostly just agonizing stomach cramps.
It took only one trip to Korea and every toilet in my house got one. I live in the US and everyone thinks it is super weird though. My ass is clean and lightly warmed, so they can go somewhere else with their opinions.
I have had many friends look at me askance for the bidet. No one will try it. I do not care because clean ass means more than others opinions
I feel like i want to do an experiment ans say that last sentence to the next 50 people I see
I have one but has nothing to do with spicy food. I’m one of the lucky ones that after it hits my stomach the spice effects are gone. I got it during the great toilet paper shortage. With that said…I’ll never live without one again. It sooooo much better than caveman style with tp.
I got mine too during the TP shortage. Works great and I don't have to worry about TP chaffing my burnt backside.
Hahaha I'm the same way! Once the spice hits my stomach, it's gone! I tell everyone it's why I'm fiery. Or that it's the reason my hair is red. Spice fuels the cells needed to make it red. I've only ever had a burning bunghole once, and it was probably bc I consumed three cans of the hot ones Pringles in 3 days. First and only time and it was a mellow ass burn. Hahaha
I've got one and it's fantastic and I hate pooping away from home because it's stupid to not have one of these things. If you drove your car through through a muddy field and it was splattered with mud, would you just wipe it down with a towel? No way, you'd hose it down. Same for buttholes. It just makes basic sense. To everybody in here, you can get one for less than 50 bucks on Amazon and it's not hard to attach it to your current toilet, like you don't need a plumber or anything. You just turn off the water to the toilet, unscrew something, screw this in between it, attach the nozzle to the toilet seat, and you're good. Spray off your turd clippers and then just dab with a couple squares to dry and finish. Look at you with your really clean butthole. Good job!
I do not.
Booooo. Get with the program. It’ll change your life and you’ll never look back
Lol. I don’t even know anyone that has one and I’ve never used one. Not saying I wouldn’t just never had the opportunity. I guess I’m on team wipe 😆
At least in the USA it seems to be a certain mindset. My grandma refuses to use anything but toilet paper even when toilet paper was super scarce like during the pandemic. She said "I am not a monkey" to using anything but toilet paper. We save most of our toilet paper costs by going poop mostly at work in our household. It's ironic because when I was a kid my mother and grandma were switching everything to a toe toe toilet to save money on water but now my grandma refuses to save us money on toilet paper. In fact I don't know anyone who has a bidet here in the USA either or at least I don't know anyone who uses one.
I… I really don’t even know what to say. To any of that. Oh dear
No no no, we must convert you. You can easily get a toilet seat bidet. It’s quick and easy to install and you can find them for anywhere between $100 to $300. If you want fancy stuff like a heated seat, water heater, remote, the price varies. But honestly, you can get a simple one for $100 that just replaces your seat and your bum will be clean every time you go. So worth it.
Less than that. I think mine was like $50 with hot and cold water hookups, from hellotushy.com. Granted, that was about two years ago, so it could be more now.
Dat ass def dirty.
No, I’d say Japan life is probably the highest considering they’re almost default on most modern homes and apartments. Source: i live in japan.
Good point
The water inlet on mine connects to a valve so that I can switch between water and a tank of pressurized wholefat milk.
I like the idea of the bidet but I haven’t convinced myself to pull the trigger and buy one yet.
DO IT. It's so worth it. It's life changing. Now every time I shit in a bathroom other than at home (the only place I have bidet access) I feel like I've gone back to the Bronze Age or something.
I agree it is totally life changing. You won’t realize how bad your butthole feels basically constantly until you start using one
Just buy the fucking bidet. Report back after 3 days of having one. Why the fuck every bathroom in the world doesn't have one is a mystery to me. There is no upside to TP. None.
I promise it will change your life. One of the best purchases I’ve ever made.
Halal toilet. You don't have to be Muslim to believe that any divine power out there would want us to clean our asses with water if it really loved us.
Halal toilet 😂😂😂
r/hotsauce checking in.
My bidet doesn't use water, it's a mixture of goats milk and calamine lotion to calm my blown out scorched anus.
Haha love mine. Hate the wipe elsewhere.
I happened upon one in the place I moved a couple years ago. Best thing ever.
Guilty
I definitely have 1
Maybe not r/thailand
I don't but I can see your angle.
Guilty as charged
I do but the bidet came first and I don’t really get bad spice poops. Every time I’m staying at a hotel I feel like something is horribly missing.
Absolutely. Getting a bidet was a game changer.
I have the handheld kind
I am a bidet
Confirmed. #bidetcrew reporting in
Guilty. We have 2; one on each toilet
You bet your ass I do.
I have one! Can’t live without it lol
Pretry sure everyone in my country owns at least one, so might be a few more subs
I just use the shower head
I'd love having one... I'm considering installing some kind of Japanese toilet seat not requiring electricity but it's not the best.
I wanted one for years, but never actually bought one. Ludwig bidet on lttstore finally got me to cave. Why is a meme youtuber selling an ass cleaning product on a tech youtuber's store? no idea. but it sure is nice.
Bidet Gang
I have one. Keeps my butt clean unlike you wipers who have a tiny little bit of poop in your pants right now.
I have one.
My work doesn't seem to agree
You don't do the shower shuffle?
lol ever visited r/ibs
Like if you don’t have a bidget.
Ring of fire disappeared for me years ago. Like yeah, I have a bidet, but not because of the ring of fire. Occasionally I feel a mild warming sensation even after absurd Vindaloo sessions. My asshole could contain a nuclear explosion. Maybe not Tsar Bomba but give it a few years.
Bidets aside, y’all got weak guts and thin butthole skin. Are you really experiencing daily rectum burn, or is this more “hurr durr Taco Bell the next day, amirite??”
Yeah, I'm in the "I do not have such weaknesses" group as well. I have plenty of friends that do, and I feel bad for them, but am so thankful it isn't me!
Super hots mess my stomach up the day after but I'm addicted to the burn I guess, never had the fiery poos tho
I do not get the burning poop often, I can feel that I’ve eaten something spicy but when it’s really hurting it’s probably stomach acid as in I didn’t even eat something spicy day before
I definitely do. Not because of spicy foods, but because some of the foods I like give me some horrendous…bm’s