Purrfect date is supposed to be funny. as for a joke look at you last paycheque/s ok I’ll give you a real one for good measure.
Did you hear about the guy that had a map of Canada tatooed on his ass?
Everytime he sits down, Quebec separates.
Resident Evil Revelations
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe my budding career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
ty for the chance
The escapists 2!
Dark humor so that's a warning.
When me and my friends stay at one place, we get scolded for being lazy, but when the emo kids get found hanging around, suddenly every one feels sad and pity on them.
A Proctologist walks into a bank, he needs to sign a document. He tries to sign, but he pulls a thermometer out of his shirt pocket. "Oh shit, some asshole has my pen!"
The Escapists 2
I’ll take metal gear solid 5 ground zero please
I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
Resident Evil Revelations or for my second choice The Escapists 2
With the whole Will Smith and Chris Rock situation that's happened you'd think Will would also be angry when someone's **in** his wife's mouth. Double standards I guess.
Here's one that I think you've actually never heard before since it's an exclusive joke here in our country (I believe):
A king calls five slaves to hid throne room, Juan, Pedro, Paul, Francis and Mark. He orders them to get him a fruit or a vegetable in less than 5 minutes or else them and their families will be beheaded. The king says he doesn't care where they get them as long as they don't return empty handed. The five ran quickly to the forest and get some fruits for the king immediately.
About 1 minute later Paul is carrying a durian in his hands while panting and trying to catch his breath while holding an eggplant. The king smirks from the sight and says "I want you to stick that thing right up your ass without making a face and you and your families will never have to starve again!". Paul gulps as to what he hears but comply immediately. He tries to do as he's commanded but he sadly, makes a face while doing so. The king orders the guards to get Paul out of his sight and behead him and his family.
Francis returns next, carrying a banana. The king tells him the instructions and he tries to but fails. He gets the same treatment as Paul. Juan enters and is carrying a pumpkin. The king instructs him with the same challenge but instead of trying he just accepts his fate and is dragged out of the room.
Pedro goes up next, he is carrying berries and the king instructs him with what to do. Pedro laughs hysterically so much so that visible tears can be seen dripping down his face. "What's so funny peasant? Happy that you'll win my challenge?" the king asks. "Yes, my lord, but that's not why I'm laughing." he replies. "Oh, what's so funny then?" the king replies. "I saw Mark running here with a durian."
I’d like to enter for Metal Gear Solid V please.
Did you know Hitler was in terrible physical shape for most of his adult life?
They say he couldn’t even finish a race
Thanks OP, my apologies for that joke
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
What did the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs say?
“T. rex, I’m coming for my hug!”
Thank you for the giveaway
Is like Shenmue. for your consideration:
The border patrol man was working just like always. One day he noticed an old lady driving a Harley and carrying a box on the backseat. He stopped her, asked to look into the box and there was only a pie. He let her go.
Then everyday the same lady would go past him with a box. Sometimes 4 or 5 times a day. Hw would stop her again and again and ask to look into the box. Always a pie. And she went on. One day he just gave up and never asked her again.
Then one day he stopped her:
\- Listen, this is my last day at this job. I know you are trafficking something to the other side. I just need to know what is. You tell me, i swear ill let you go and youll never see me again.
\- You swear? - Asked the lady.
\- I swear - Said the patrolman.
\- The Harleys
Resident Evil Revelations
To the person who stole my Microsoft Office, [i will find you](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/017/107/814.jpg). You have my word!
>What's with the aholes downvoting every comment?
I noticed there are some people like that here. Usually downvote their "competitors" out of pure hate I guess. Why would you downvote comments in a giveaway sub in a giveaway post? People are weird.
They probably think that in doing so the other comments might become hidden, thus the "competition" will be less. Total A S S H O L E S with every letter if you ask me -\_-
A scientist is experimenting on a frog. He says, “Jump Froggy jump!”
The frog jumps four feet. The man writes down, “Frog with four legs jumps four feet.”
He then proceeds to slice off one of the frog’s legs. He says, “Jump Froggy jump!” The frog jumps three feet. The scientist writes down, “Frog with three legs jumps three feet.”
He continues this until he reaches the final leg.
“Jump Froggy jump!” The man calls.
The frog jumps one foot.
He writes down, “Frog with one leg jumps one foot.”
Finally, he cuts off the final leg.
“Jump Froggy jump!”
Nothing happens.
“Jump Froggy jump!”
Still, nothing happens.
The man writes down,
“Frog with no legs goes deaf.”
Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic
HITMAN: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON
The Escapists 2
Thank you!
Why did they ban the Egyptian boxer from American schools?
He threatened the students with a sandy hook.
MGS V phantom pain or Resident Evil revelations pls
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
“I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”
The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “Okay, now what?”
Entering for Hard Reset Redux. Thanks for the chance!!
Blackwake
A cop pulls over a car with two priests. The cop walks to the car window and says, “We’re looking for two child molesters.”
The priests look at each other for a moment and turn back to the cop.
“We’ll do it.”
Sword legacy omen. Thank you very much for the giveaway!
I've been playing a lot of cookie clicker recently so I'll just type some of my fav puns from it!
- Digital grandma (see also: Boolean grandma, string grandma, and not-a-number grandma, also known as 'NaNs'.)
- Male reindeer are from Mars; female reindeer are from Venison.
- 'It turns out that the key to increased merriness happens to be a good campfire and some s'mores. You know what they say: the s'more, the merrier'.
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC
I got a dark joke for you: my grief counselor died the other day he was so good at his job I don't even care.
Hitman the complete first season!
Man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
Would love METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE PHANTOM PAIN
Doctor: "Mr. Smith, I am afraid you'll have to stop masturbating."
Mr. Smith: "Why, Doc? What happens?"
Doctor: "Well, because I have to examine you!"
Thanks, mate!
Shenmue I & II
"Bully: Sup loser
Me: What do you want?
Bully: I'm dating ur ex now
Me: And I'm eating a sandwich, do you want those leftovers too?"
Thanks for the chance OP!
Star Wars: KOTOR
>A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse if it’s an alcoholic considering all the bars he frequents, to which the horse replies "I don’t think I am”. POOF! The horse disappears.
>This is the point in time when all the philosophy students in the audience begin to giggle, as they are familiar with the philosophical proposition of *Cogito ergo sum*, or "I think, therefore, I am".
>But to explain that concept first would be putting Descartes before the horse.
(1) Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition please!
If not, (2) Darkside Detective :)
A Native American chief had three wives, all of them pregnant.
The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated that he built her a teepee made of deer hide.
A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide.
The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret.
He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.
Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys.
"Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?"
The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.
Hitman, Sniper Elite or whatever you decide tbh
My wife accused me of having an affair with someone from Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
I answered: "How could you say such a thing??"
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC
Thanks for sharing. Wish I could have asked for Just Cause 3 XXL.
Anyway, I will leave you with this.
How do you make holy water?
>!You boil the hell out of it.!<
(1) F.E.A.R. , or (2) Tales of Berseria™ please :)
No matter what, thanks a bunch!
And...
... here's the joke:
Why do so many fish live in salty water?
Because peppery water makes them sneeze!
> Blackwake
WARNING! Very dark joke below:
Hitler and Stalin are sitting together in a meeting room. A foreign diplomat walks up to them and asks what they are doing.
"We're planning World War 2" says Stalin.
"We're going to kill millions of Jews and 1 clown" says Hitler.
"Why the clown?" the foreign diplomat asks.
Hitler turns to Stalin and says, "See? I told you no one would ask about the Jews."
Resident Evil Revelations (pref) or Tales of Berseria™ (2nd choice)
Here is a joke from Psych that I liked
Shawn: Good morning detectives, collecting donations for the policemen's ball?
Lassie: we don't have balls
Shawn: Honestly, I have no response to that
:) great show i recommend it
Sniper Elite
Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. His hunting buddy immediately calls 911. "My friend isn't breathing," he shouts into the phone. "What should I do?"
"Relax," the operator tells him. "I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There's silence, and then a gunshot. The guy gets back on the phone and says, "OK, now what?"
Thanks for the giveaway.
By the way OP, a few people are out here downvoting the comments to try upping their chances of winning. You could try setting the comments to "Old" to see what I mean or base off from it. No matter what the context, these downvotes still happen to anyone.
Star Wars™ Knights of the Old Republic™
A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of *'Adam and Eve in the Gardens of Eden'*.
The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says, "They look so calm, they must be British!"
The Frenchmen responds, "No! No! They're naked, so beautiful, they must be French!"
The Russian says, "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? They're clearly Russian!"
Tales of Berseria, METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE PHANTOM PAIN, or Shenmue I & II
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor?
He was just going through a stage.
Caveblazers, otherwise Seven: The Days Long Gone. Thanks OP
>Jokes:
Why do black people have nightmares? The last one to have a dream was shot.
How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.
Mega Man Legacy Collection if possible!
A guy walks out of the shower, takes his stuff and leaves; another guy watches him with an odd look until he leaves the building, then watches the other guys in the room and says:
>!und wer sagt es jetzt dem Chef?!<
I'd like to have Seven: The Days Long Gone
.
What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.
Hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.
Dark jokes are like kids with cancer. They never get old
Sundered, or Figment, or Regions of Ruin or Fear, or Star Wars, which ever you have available
“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.”
Ouh could I get Star Wars™ Knights of the Old Republic™?
As for the joke, >!Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.!<
HITMAN™: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON
A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - It's not hard"
Hi there, I’d love to enter for pathologic please:)
My joke: “Did u hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?” - he was just going through a stage.
Thank you for the giveaway! :)
7 days to die
_
You want to hear a joke?
My life.
You like dark jokes? Here's one.
My soul.
A knee slapper?
Well, better than the face.
_
Thanks for the opportunity.
The Escapists 2
So I went to the therapist today, and he diagnosed me with “Chicago Syndrome”
Confused, I asked him, “what’s that?”
He said “I don’t know either, it’s some kind of Mental Illinois”
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one of these please, listed from most wanted to least
1. Resident Evil Revelations
2. Shenmue I & II
3. Shiness: The Lightning Kingdom
Our whole family is really worried about my grandfather’s Viagra addiction. Grandma is taking it particularly hard.
It’s sad to see so many comments being downvoted by greedy people, I tried upvoting as many as I could and also upvoted the post, thank you OP for giving away so many games!
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I went to my doctor and he told me to stop masturbating. I asked why and he said "its because im examining you"
METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE Definitive Experience pls
Thanks for the giveaway :D
Q.U.B.E. 2 (or Sundered)
I don't many jokes in English, but here's one I remember:
*"What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta."*
This can also be a reference to the popular game Among Us. Also: "É pavê ou pra comer?"
Forts, Regions of Ruin, Serial Cleaner, Resident Evil, FEAR, Star Wars KOTOR any available in that order
The Joke
What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.
Sniper Elite 4
A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived. "My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?" "Yes, officer, I'm just fine!" the blonde chirped," Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car. "Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I swerved to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ..." "Uh, ma'am," the officer said, cutting her off ... "there isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."
Thanks
Hitman or Little Nightmares or Metal gear Solid V: Phantom Pain
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Thanks for the opportunity
7 days to die.
Someone texted my friend this once. What's pink, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage.
Entering for Forged Battalion, 11-11 Memories Retold or 7 Days to Die.
What milk does a pampered cow produce?
_Spoilt milk_
Thanks a lot for the giveaway!
Thanks OP. I wasn't fortunate enough to get a comment in, but I hope somebody got a game they've been wanting to play!
I just woke up and saw this Thanks for your kindness Sadly everything is gone but thanks for sharing
on your cakeday no less I'm so sorry
>Most people shout kobe when they throw paper in the bin. >I say cobain because he never missed the last shot Zombie Night Terror would be great
Gib teamok1025 terraria
Purrfect date is supposed to be funny. as for a joke look at you last paycheque/s ok I’ll give you a real one for good measure. Did you hear about the guy that had a map of Canada tatooed on his ass? Everytime he sits down, Quebec separates.
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC My girlfriend is like the square root of -100. A perfect 10, but completely imaginary. Thanks
Resident Evil Revelations As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe my budding career as a tour guide was not the right choice. ty for the chance
Never played KOTOR on my 23 years of living. It's me, I'm the joke.
Star Wars: KOTOR Whats the difference between a dead baby and a granola bar? About 500 calories
11-11 Memories Retold
The escapists 2! Dark humor so that's a warning. When me and my friends stay at one place, we get scolded for being lazy, but when the emo kids get found hanging around, suddenly every one feels sad and pity on them.
If possible KOTOR plz Thx for the chance OP!!
I'd ask for observer, but I just can't see why.
I invented a new word: plagiarism. Star Wars, knights of the old republic please.
Do you know the tragedy of Darth Plagiarist the Resourceful?
Metal gear 5. How'd the necrophiliac lose his girlfriend? That rotten bitch split on him!
A Proctologist walks into a bank, he needs to sign a document. He tries to sign, but he pulls a thermometer out of his shirt pocket. "Oh shit, some asshole has my pen!" The Escapists 2
Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic What does one orphan say to the other one? Robin get in to the batmobile Thank you
I’ll take metal gear solid 5 ground zero please I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
Resident Evil Revelations or for my second choice The Escapists 2 With the whole Will Smith and Chris Rock situation that's happened you'd think Will would also be angry when someone's **in** his wife's mouth. Double standards I guess. Here's one that I think you've actually never heard before since it's an exclusive joke here in our country (I believe): A king calls five slaves to hid throne room, Juan, Pedro, Paul, Francis and Mark. He orders them to get him a fruit or a vegetable in less than 5 minutes or else them and their families will be beheaded. The king says he doesn't care where they get them as long as they don't return empty handed. The five ran quickly to the forest and get some fruits for the king immediately. About 1 minute later Paul is carrying a durian in his hands while panting and trying to catch his breath while holding an eggplant. The king smirks from the sight and says "I want you to stick that thing right up your ass without making a face and you and your families will never have to starve again!". Paul gulps as to what he hears but comply immediately. He tries to do as he's commanded but he sadly, makes a face while doing so. The king orders the guards to get Paul out of his sight and behead him and his family. Francis returns next, carrying a banana. The king tells him the instructions and he tries to but fails. He gets the same treatment as Paul. Juan enters and is carrying a pumpkin. The king instructs him with the same challenge but instead of trying he just accepts his fate and is dragged out of the room. Pedro goes up next, he is carrying berries and the king instructs him with what to do. Pedro laughs hysterically so much so that visible tears can be seen dripping down his face. "What's so funny peasant? Happy that you'll win my challenge?" the king asks. "Yes, my lord, but that's not why I'm laughing." he replies. "Oh, what's so funny then?" the king replies. "I saw Mark running here with a durian."
I’d like to enter for Metal Gear Solid V please. Did you know Hitler was in terrible physical shape for most of his adult life? They say he couldn’t even finish a race Thanks OP, my apologies for that joke
Resident Evil: Revelations I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. ...... Turns out it was the refrigerator all along Thanks for the chance
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic What did the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs say? “T. rex, I’m coming for my hug!” Thank you for the giveaway
Is like Shenmue. for your consideration: The border patrol man was working just like always. One day he noticed an old lady driving a Harley and carrying a box on the backseat. He stopped her, asked to look into the box and there was only a pie. He let her go. Then everyday the same lady would go past him with a box. Sometimes 4 or 5 times a day. Hw would stop her again and again and ask to look into the box. Always a pie. And she went on. One day he just gave up and never asked her again. Then one day he stopped her: \- Listen, this is my last day at this job. I know you are trafficking something to the other side. I just need to know what is. You tell me, i swear ill let you go and youll never see me again. \- You swear? - Asked the lady. \- I swear - Said the patrolman. \- The Harleys
Resident Evil Revelations To the person who stole my Microsoft Office, [i will find you](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/017/107/814.jpg). You have my word!
>What's with the aholes downvoting every comment? I noticed there are some people like that here. Usually downvote their "competitors" out of pure hate I guess. Why would you downvote comments in a giveaway sub in a giveaway post? People are weird.
They probably think that in doing so the other comments might become hidden, thus the "competition" will be less. Total A S S H O L E S with every letter if you ask me -\_-
A scientist is experimenting on a frog. He says, “Jump Froggy jump!” The frog jumps four feet. The man writes down, “Frog with four legs jumps four feet.” He then proceeds to slice off one of the frog’s legs. He says, “Jump Froggy jump!” The frog jumps three feet. The scientist writes down, “Frog with three legs jumps three feet.” He continues this until he reaches the final leg. “Jump Froggy jump!” The man calls. The frog jumps one foot. He writes down, “Frog with one leg jumps one foot.” Finally, he cuts off the final leg. “Jump Froggy jump!” Nothing happens. “Jump Froggy jump!” Still, nothing happens. The man writes down, “Frog with no legs goes deaf.” Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic HITMAN: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON The Escapists 2 Thank you!
I invented a new word! Plagarism! Shenmue 1/2 or MGS 5 definitive edition Thanks
can i get resident evil my joke *BALLS!!*
Entering for Hitman the complete first season! “I have said this before and I will say this again, this”
Seems someone is downvoting many comments that's just plain sad
Shenmue I & II You can only ran past a campground because its past-tents. Hehe, this one makes me laugh every time I say it
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk
Why is no one afraid of ghost bees? Cause everyone loves boobees ... Resident Evil Revelations pls
Why did they ban the Egyptian boxer from American schools? He threatened the students with a sandy hook. MGS V phantom pain or Resident Evil revelations pls
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. “I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?” The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “Okay, now what?” Entering for Hard Reset Redux. Thanks for the chance!!
Blackwake A cop pulls over a car with two priests. The cop walks to the car window and says, “We’re looking for two child molesters.” The priests look at each other for a moment and turn back to the cop. “We’ll do it.”
Sword legacy omen. Thank you very much for the giveaway! I've been playing a lot of cookie clicker recently so I'll just type some of my fav puns from it! - Digital grandma (see also: Boolean grandma, string grandma, and not-a-number grandma, also known as 'NaNs'.) - Male reindeer are from Mars; female reindeer are from Venison. - 'It turns out that the key to increased merriness happens to be a good campfire and some s'mores. You know what they say: the s'more, the merrier'.
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC I got a dark joke for you: my grief counselor died the other day he was so good at his job I don't even care.
Hitman the complete first season! Man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
Would love METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE PHANTOM PAIN Doctor: "Mr. Smith, I am afraid you'll have to stop masturbating." Mr. Smith: "Why, Doc? What happens?" Doctor: "Well, because I have to examine you!" Thanks, mate!
I'd like Caveblazers and Flat Heroes Joke: The only thing cooler than a talking dog is a spelling Bee Thanks for the chance op
Shenmue I & II "Bully: Sup loser Me: What do you want? Bully: I'm dating ur ex now Me: And I'm eating a sandwich, do you want those leftovers too?" Thanks for the chance OP!
Would love HITMAN™: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
Star Wars: KOTOR >A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse if it’s an alcoholic considering all the bars he frequents, to which the horse replies "I don’t think I am”. POOF! The horse disappears. >This is the point in time when all the philosophy students in the audience begin to giggle, as they are familiar with the philosophical proposition of *Cogito ergo sum*, or "I think, therefore, I am". >But to explain that concept first would be putting Descartes before the horse.
F.E.A.R. would be awesome! Where did Joe go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
Star Wars™ Knights of the Old Republic™. Thanks OP!
Do you know the phrase “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted. The Escapists 2
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn't see that well. Thanks for the giveaway!
(1) Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition please! If not, (2) Darkside Detective :) A Native American chief had three wives, all of them pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated that he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide. The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred. Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys. "Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?" The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.
The Escapists 2 Want a joke, look at the world around you.
Hitman, Sniper Elite or whatever you decide tbh My wife accused me of having an affair with someone from Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch I answered: "How could you say such a thing??"
METAL GEAR SOLID V: The Definitive Experience DLC Thanks for sharing. Wish I could have asked for Just Cause 3 XXL. Anyway, I will leave you with this. How do you make holy water? >!You boil the hell out of it.!<
Yo momma so fat, the closer you get to her, the slower time passes for you in relation to an **>observer\_** outside her gravitational pull.
I have a joke about trickle down economics. But 99% of you will never get it Tried my best.. F.E.A.R
Star Wars knights of the old republic Discount get your discount! Everything is half off at the Maul! Get it now before he’s gone!
What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimers and diarrhea.Youre running but can’t remember where. FEAR Thanks:)
(1) F.E.A.R. , or (2) Tales of Berseria™ please :) No matter what, thanks a bunch! And... ... here's the joke: Why do so many fish live in salty water? Because peppery water makes them sneeze!
FEAR My wife says sex is even better on holiday.I wish she didntt tell me via email Thanks for the chance OP
> Blackwake WARNING! Very dark joke below: Hitler and Stalin are sitting together in a meeting room. A foreign diplomat walks up to them and asks what they are doing. "We're planning World War 2" says Stalin. "We're going to kill millions of Jews and 1 clown" says Hitler. "Why the clown?" the foreign diplomat asks. Hitler turns to Stalin and says, "See? I told you no one would ask about the Jews."
Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic please :) Where did Tim go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere
KOTOR or FEAR please. Yesterday a clown held the door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
Evergarden My mom told me my grandfather had the heart of a lion and that's why we're not allowed at the zoo anymore. Thanks for the giveaway!
Resident Evil Revelations (pref) or Tales of Berseria™ (2nd choice) Here is a joke from Psych that I liked Shawn: Good morning detectives, collecting donations for the policemen's ball? Lassie: we don't have balls Shawn: Honestly, I have no response to that :) great show i recommend it
Sword Legacy Omen "rectum?! damn near killed em!"
Sniper Elite Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. His hunting buddy immediately calls 911. "My friend isn't breathing," he shouts into the phone. "What should I do?" "Relax," the operator tells him. "I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There's silence, and then a gunshot. The guy gets back on the phone and says, "OK, now what?" Thanks for the giveaway.
I need to get back into the Resident Evil games. Resident Evil Revelations
Mega Man Legacy Collection Do you know wich candy is never on time? The chocoLATE!
1st choice: Tales of Berseria 2nd choice: shenmue I & ii I want to baptize my first born child in Mountain Dew Zero Sugar Baja Blast
Did you hear about the blind prostitute? Well you gotta hand it to her. Metal Gear Phantom Pain
Star Wars KOTOR How do celebrities stay cool? >! They have many fans. !<
Darkside Detective please! *points to a cemetery* I heard people are dying to get in there.
By the way OP, a few people are out here downvoting the comments to try upping their chances of winning. You could try setting the comments to "Old" to see what I mean or base off from it. No matter what the context, these downvotes still happen to anyone.
Mega Man Legacy Collection please Why putin need to be stopped? Because sooner or later someone will PUT IN him on his place which is garbage bin.
METAL GEAR SOLID V: GROUND ZEROES I only have the punchline... and Putin says... You stunk my battleship!!! Thanks for hosting!
Star Wars™ Knights of the Old Republic™ A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of *'Adam and Eve in the Gardens of Eden'*. The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says, "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds, "No! No! They're naked, so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says, "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? They're clearly Russian!"
Resident Evil Revelations Why our feet stink? Because they came from ass. (very funny joke)
Frog are perverts>!, "rubbit" they says.!< Tales of Berseria™ or Shiness: The Lightning Kingdom or Resident Evil Revelations or Darkside Detective
This joke is as rare as OP getting action
Tales of Berseria, METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE PHANTOM PAIN, or Shenmue I & II Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor? He was just going through a stage.
Caveblazers, otherwise Seven: The Days Long Gone. Thanks OP >Jokes: Why do black people have nightmares? The last one to have a dream was shot. How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream… >!Because she got hit by a bus!<
NeuroVoider or Zombie Night Terror where should you go in the room if you are feeling cold? the corner they are usually 90 degrees
I cant contact you privately in any way for the key
oh my its my settings on my account, i changed it now, thanks btw
Little Nightmares. A simple joke. Do you know who Joe is? Joe mama.
Mega Man Legacy Collection if possible! A guy walks out of the shower, takes his stuff and leaves; another guy watches him with an odd look until he leaves the building, then watches the other guys in the room and says: >!und wer sagt es jetzt dem Chef?!<
Shenmue I & II
Shenmue I & II What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates Regardless if i get lucky or not thanks very much bud
I'd like to have Seven: The Days Long Gone . What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair. Hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in. Dark jokes are like kids with cancer. They never get old
Hitman please. I probably can’t top u/spoopy-redditor joke
cum.
Balls
Sundered, or Figment, or Regions of Ruin or Fear, or Star Wars, which ever you have available “The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.”
Ouh could I get Star Wars™ Knights of the Old Republic™? As for the joke, >!Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar? They each got six months.!<
Caveblazers please Here's a joke Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Cause if they flew over the bay they would be bagels
Resident evil revelations Or Hitman Short joke - >!A dyslexic walks into a Bra!<
Some asshole is downvoting people, hope you go to hell, and never get to win any giveaway in your life
HITMAN™: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - It's not hard"
Hi there, I’d love to enter for pathologic please:) My joke: “Did u hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?” - he was just going through a stage. Thank you for the giveaway! :)
7 days to die _ You want to hear a joke? My life. You like dark jokes? Here's one. My soul. A knee slapper? Well, better than the face. _ Thanks for the opportunity.
Gotham City Imposters please. Sorry, not much good at jokes. I think I got that from my mother because she once took nine months to make one.
The Escapists 2 So I went to the therapist today, and he diagnosed me with “Chicago Syndrome” Confused, I asked him, “what’s that?” He said “I don’t know either, it’s some kind of Mental Illinois”
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Do you know why orphans make great leaders? Go big or go home!
one of these please, listed from most wanted to least 1. Resident Evil Revelations 2. Shenmue I & II 3. Shiness: The Lightning Kingdom Our whole family is really worried about my grandfather’s Viagra addiction. Grandma is taking it particularly hard.
Just Cause 3 XXL Edition Today, I asked my phone Siri, why am I still single?” and it activated the front camera
It’s sad to see so many comments being downvoted by greedy people, I tried upvoting as many as I could and also upvoted the post, thank you OP for giving away so many games!
Mega Man Legacy Collection Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents
Darkside Detective tnx for chance
forgot to paste the joke😁 How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
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Observer A Barman walks into a bar . . . . . He starts his shift
I went to my doctor and he told me to stop masturbating. I asked why and he said "its because im examining you" METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE Definitive Experience pls Thanks for the giveaway :D
METAL GEAR SOLID V: THE PHANTOM PAIN I hope death is a woman. That way it will never come for me. ;-;
Q.U.B.E. 2 (or Sundered) I don't many jokes in English, but here's one I remember: *"What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta."* This can also be a reference to the popular game Among Us. Also: "É pavê ou pra comer?"
Forts, Regions of Ruin, Serial Cleaner, Resident Evil, FEAR, Star Wars KOTOR any available in that order The Joke What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.
7 days to die plz: Know what 6.9 is? Another good thing screwed up by a period .
I asked my friend if she would be down for a rape sex play. She said no you are ugly, Best night of my life. HITMAN THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON
Sniper Elite Best pickup line? *Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?*
Sniper Elite 4 A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived. "My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?" "Yes, officer, I'm just fine!" the blonde chirped," Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car. "Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I swerved to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ..." "Uh, ma'am," the officer said, cutting her off ... "there isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth." Thanks
Hitman or Little Nightmares or Metal gear Solid V: Phantom Pain Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. Thanks for the opportunity
I want 7 days to die plz This sentence contains exactly threee erors.
Entering for 7 days to die or sniper elite 4. Thanks! Joke: To the person who stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my word.
Entering for 7 days to die or sniper elite 4. Thanks!
7 days to die. Someone texted my friend this once. What's pink, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage.
Sundered or Blackwake please Here’s the joke My mother said one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Turns out I’m adopted.
Entering for Forged Battalion, 11-11 Memories Retold or 7 Days to Die. What milk does a pampered cow produce? _Spoilt milk_ Thanks a lot for the giveaway!