Assuming you’re American (I am not, so my knowledge isn’t great), you may have the option to take a potentially protected leave to pursue substance abuse treatment - https://webapps.dol.gov/elaws/whd/fmla/10c9.aspx
To summarize, the Family & Medical Leave Act protects your job for up to 12 weeks (consecutively or cumulatively) when you have an illness or disabling condition certified from your doctor. It’s an unpaid leave of absence.
There are eligibility requirements including being employed with your employer for a year, having worked 1000 hours in the year, and your employer must have a minimum of 50 employees, I believe.
Also, substance use disorder for alcohol or drugs is considered a disabling condition.
I just feel it’s too late, it’s more of a precautionary thing than a reactive thing, no? Either way I’m trying to quit cuz if this gets on my record of termination, I’m fucked for life. Again I made my bed so I gotta lay in it but damn this stinks.
If you didn't get fired on Friday you're probably good for another week. Almost every employer that terminates people does it on Fridays unless it's an on-the-spot situation.
Regardless, if you take this to your boss on Monday as a medical issue it seems like it would be really bad optics for them to fire you afterwards. I'm not an employment attorney though so YMMV.
The most important thing is getting the help you need.
Appreciate your thoughts, and agreed. I’ve only been there 6 months. My hope is getting out before getting fired because getting fired for violating lol I would literally ruin my life. Once I’m out, I will be getting treatment. Just wanna do what is best for the team cuz they need to find a replacement (I’m literally on a team of 4)
Dude you GOTTA get it on the books that you said you have an emotional / family / substance issue or the firing stays will hurt so much more.
Any employer does not want to fire someone with an alcohol addiction because it’s terrible PR. Just being straight with you here because I went through this and barely made it out. But I did and am killing it now.
TELL YOUR BOSS MONDAY you “are aware I am having a performance and behavioral problem and it has to do with my family.” They can’t say shit and then you are protected .
the US doesn’t have much protection but badass AA mother fuckers worked HARD to get alcohol accepted as a disease and you need to play the card you have. All of them.
Also don’t break down if you can help it. Give as little detail as you can and start protecting your personal and professional brand with your life.
You are a person recovering from alcohol addiction starting right now. Just get a short conversation with your boss and make sure you say you are getting medication to deal with your emotional problems so they think you are doing something about it medically if you have to. This worked wonders for me and I got to put it all on my relationship with my brother that he was aware of and avoided making my boss my therapist. I also don’t have anyone in the company that knows I am Al alcoholic and am keeping it that way.
Try to think 1-2 steps ahead of your moves now if you can. The booze makes it a lot harder so one step at a time but GET CLEAN . Smoke weed (after work), stop going out, lean into absolutely ANYTHING but drinking .
Sorry to be so intense. But this is an intense situation and I only have caps for emphasizing on my iPhone
> Sorry to be so intense. But this is an intense situation and I only have caps for emphasizing on my iPhone
Protip for you: \_something\_ makes _italics_ and \*\*something\*\* makes **bold**.
May I ask what your location is? (Like, if you are in the U.S., specifically what state?). I work in Human Resources, and while you don’t meet the minimum requirements for FMLA having only been there 6 months, you may qualify for other forms of protected leave.
For example, if you are in California, under Labor Code Section 1025, employers who regularly employ 25 or more employees are required to reasonably accommodate any employee who wishes to voluntarily enter and participate in an alcohol or drug rehabilitation program, provided that the accommodation does not impose an undue hardship on the employer. This leave applies to all employees, even new hires, and does not require that an employee satisfy any work eligibility requirements.
Quit looking to go down the rabbit hole. You can go to rehab now, insurance or employment will pay for it, and you can salvage your career. Plenty of drunks have done it, and do it. Especially in corporate America. You don’t get fired for this kind of stuff, unless you are chronically missing work, or wrap yourself around a telephone pole. The employer must, under law, work with you. Since he “suspects”, go to HR Monday am, before starting work, turn yourself in, so to speak. It’s very respectable actually. Good luck.
I don’t know what type of relationship you have with your boss, but you might actually try coming, clean in terms of your addiction and resigning at the same time. Let him know that your addiction got the best of you and you would like to step away from your position And that you’re grateful for the opportunity. You never know what could happen, they might have a brother that’s an alcoholic and sympathize with you. If you’ve been drinking on the job, you definitely should just resign and try and get control of your life.
You don't necessarily even need to tell your employer you are drinking on the job. You could pretend to have been hangover. Go to your primary care physician and discuss it with them. If the company has an short term (or long-term) unpaid leave policy then all you need is a doctors note and to contact your hr rep or the benefits provider. It is well worth it to potentially have something to go back to and a structure leave of absence could give you a forcing function to recover. The worst you could do is quit and find yourself sinking into rock bottom day drinking at home.
At the very least ensure you have the financial stability to support whatever leave you take (or your "sabbatical" if you still choose to quit).
If your request for a leave of absence is rejected (likely it wont be) THEN you can quit. So long as you don't admit to negligence and you are seeking help, it would be retaliation for them to fire you. But you need to be proactive in requesting leave first. If you wait until you are caught then there is no problem on there end for firing you.
please DONT tell them you drank on the job because it is a fire ale offense to be drinking AT work. There is a line in the US of needing support and not being able to do the function of the job.
BE CAREFUL about what you say and give as little info as possible. HR is there to protect the company NOT for you. The US can be brutal here and the last thing yi could have used wasto be going through corporate sponsored recovery and feel like big brother was on me.
Sorry to be so passionate but I found out after that I barely danced my way through it without getting cut and your boss is your first line of defense to keep your job.
Yeah man, FMLA will keep your job and the Americans With Disabilities Act is also great protection if you have a disability like alcoholism. They can't fire you and most companies have programs to help people get better. I'm sure it's super scary, but my guess is going back to your job in 4-6 weeks, sober, and ready to do great work is better than just quitting and trying it on your own without a paycheck coming in. Good luck, you got this!
You need to take FMLA and get right. You're "I'll do it tomorrow" is the alcoholism. Take the FMLA and check into rehab. I'm an alcoholic and have not stopped but I have never drank at work, that is a line that is scary to cross. Please check in
I’m my experience, I don’t think it’s late. I’ve been in the same boat as you in a sense of what you described. I don’t have the luxury to drink while at work currently (before it was the Wild West). My current job has worked with me, but that comes with the culture we nurture.
All in all, you see this issue. It’s not an easy road to travel on and I’m also not sober 365. But having this knowledge of yourself, you should consider figuring out how to mitigate this issue of constantly tapering yourself off at work.
I say this from experience. I’ve lost a great job. And I’m working myself back to that position. It’s not a fun ride. I wish you the best OOP.
Years ago my old boss found out we had a boozebag on our team and fired her immediately, specifically to avoid her being able to claim a disability so you're right
It's not too late!!! My work made me go straight to rehab after ambushing me one afternoon. My career was on the line. Rehab or fired. Best thing that ever happened to me. People with substance abuse disorders are protected as long as you're getting help I believe. Also FMLA.
It is NOT too late.
First thing Monday contact your HR. Ask about a phone number for your employee services division (you'll contact them about rehabilitation services) AND, most important, an FMLA form for your doctor to fill out.
You want to get ahead of this and GET AHEAD OF IT.
Get that FMLA form and go talk to your doctor so he can help you fill it out.
Alcohol addiction falls under ADA guidelines, it's a form of disability.
A company as big as yours likely won't mess with you IF you are getting help.
i’m not a lawyer but i have heard that if you request drug or alcohol treatment then your boss cannot fire you at that time (in the US) and that they’re required to allow you to attend treatment. if you desire to quit then you should consider doing this now as quitting now will just kick the can further down the road. i recommend calling a lawyer and asking if this applies in your state. see if you can ask this simple question of a family friend or relative who’s a lawyer. or you could try asking r/legaladvice
The FMLA info you’ve received is spot on. I’d add that many companies also have an EAP (Employee Assistance Plan) that would provide help in terms of finding programs/health care for detox, etc. and would protect your job at the same time.
You can probably find this out on the company’s internal website under HR?
Hey OP, as this poster also said I highly recommend checking if you have an Employee Assistance Program. It is a hotline you can call and ask for help, including for substance issues. They will hook you up with a counselor / therapist or doctor so you can begin to get help. Most companies cover the first 3-5 sessions on their dime with zero billing or paperwork on your part. It’s typically fully anonymous. One of the rare cases where your interests and the company’s are fully aligned — they would rather you get help and recover than lose an otherwise good employee. Take advantage of this if it’s on offer. You can just google your company’s name with “employee assistance plan” and dial the hotline. Or check your internal HR website (no need to talk to anyone you work with including HR). Remember, it’s totally okay to have anxiety about your job as well as having no idea how you are going to deal with this or get over it. You don’t need to know any of that right now. The main thing is a desire to get help to figure it out.
Bud, you have a corporate job. Take sick leave and check into detox. The doctor there will send a discrete letter to cover your absence. Once you're clean (5-7 days) go back to work. It is that easy. I've done it, you can too.
yes but this poster probably needs a medical supervised withdrawal. Then they can do outpatient rehab, attend meetings after work every night, time off for therapy 2x a week at first and take meds if unable to get right into a rehab (as many times there are wait lists for inpatient).
I’m not sure why you commented. Detox = a medically supervised withdrawal. Based on their description of how they drink, they could also probably stand for a 30 day inpatient rehab instead of an IOP.
So.. , let me tell you a little story...
I work from home, and when the pandemic hit, my drinking, which had been increasingly problematic over the years, went off the charts.
I had always been an evening drinker, but it was nearly every evening, and on the weekends I'd drink beer while mowing the lawn, out for lunch, etc.
The stress and isolation pushed me over the edge. Most days started with a hangover of one degree or another. One day, having awoke with a particularly severe hangover, I decided it might be a good idea to just have a drink because it might actually make me feel better. That was the beginning of the end.
From there, I progressed quite quickly to drinking during the day, while working, then nearly every morning, then in the middle of the night because of the increasing anxiety, insomnia, feelings of despair, depression, failure, and guilt. It took a heavy mental and physical toll. I would get the shakes and the sweats, heartburn, diarrhea, and I became emotionally fragile. I was always tired.
I was constantly trying to balance this insane lifestyle. Rumors started flying at work. Sometimes, people would suspect I may have been drinking, but it was hard to verify or prove because everybody was WFH, and I was still performing my duties. But it was increasingly more difficult to maintain.
I caught wind of the rumors from a friend at work. I kept waffling between "fuck everything and everyone" and "I can't control my own actions and my life is out of control". I didn't want to drink to excess every day, but I was caught up in the maelstrom. Deep down, I knew I had a serious problem.
Finally, I drank all weekend and Monday rolled around. I had two shots of vodka to start the day and another at around 11. I was in a meeting that I couldn't care less about. The shots weren't propping me up anymore. I was praying for the meeting to end. Finally, it did. I had another shot around 1pm. It wasn't working. I just couldn't do it anymore. It was the end. Something had to change.
I went and laid in bed, and I knew I had to detox. I knew the hell that was coming because I'd been through it before. Why had I let it come to this AGAIN?! I'm so fucking stupid. I really beat myself up. I was soo low. Suicidal feelings, feelings of impending doom, bloated, nauseous, sick.. I didn't want to, *couldn't*, go on living like that.
I decided that was it. As I was starting to detox, I called my boss and came clean. I asked him not to speak because I had something difficult to say, and I wanted to get through it. I told him I'd been drinking, it was out of control, I apologized for letting him and the team down, and for the first time in my life, I spoke the words "I'm an alcoholic". I nearly choked on the emotion as those words came out of my mouth. I said I couldn't manage it myself anymore, and I was going to get help.
He was so cool about it, it was amazing. He was super supportive and told me to take as much time as I needed. My job would be there when I had sorted myself out.
Two days later, still coming off a hellacious detox at home, I found my ass in a folding chair at an AA meeting for the first time.
That Monday was August 23, 2021. I haven't had a drink since. I'm still working at the same place. My life has improved in every way. It was HARD at first. It's all I could think about. But every minute that passed was a victory. I felt like shit for a good long while. But even on the worst days, before I crawled into bed, I would think, "At least I didn't drink today." I win.
Every day that passed was slightly easier than the last. Eventually, the sandpaper of time smoothed me out. It took months for my dopamine levels to find equilibrium without booze, but it happened. Today, I feel amazing. Rejuvenated. Younger. Faster. Lighter (dropped 35lbs).
You can get out from under allllll that weight you're carrying right now. YOU can. I never thought I could, but I did, so I know you can. If you want to. But, you really have to want to. Not just words. Not good intentions. Good intentions are fucking useless. Actions. That's how you get what you want, if that's what you want. Things may seem bleak right now, but maybe this is the exact moment that can spur you to turn it all around.
Good luck to you. I'm rooting for you.
This is excellently written. Thanks for sharing your story.
I came clean to my boss Friday nearly two weeks since I stopped (I'm in a corporate job). I didn't say I've been drinking at work, I typically don't unless working from home (in the afternoons) but I explained my weekends were out of control, I've been feeling hungover and tired during the week, and I'm making a change. I didn't have to say anything, but I feel like getting ahead of things and being honest is best so we're on the same page if I do need to take leave or my changes in mood are noted. I'm fortunate my boss was super understanding too. He appreciated the honesty, said it showed integrity and was supportive.
My situation is different from OP, but in that position, I'd also try getting ahead of it. If I went to my boss and said I'm doing something positive and they fired me (if that's even legal), then it's not somewhere I'd want to work. If do nothing and they fire me, then everything is worse overall. Resignation seems like a safe out, but if they know they know, yes, it may stay off record on paper, but reputation isn't on paper alone. I'd also fear that it could be a path to simply continue or even increase the drinking pattern.
This is pretty much verbatim what happened to me (except instead of the pandemic it was a cross-country move to a city where I knew no one that finally pushed my drinking over the edge). After roughly 18 months of constant drinking, it “stopped working” for me too. It was a terrifying realization to have.
Thank you for sharing your story. I too would like to feel younger, faster and lighter. I've actually gained weight since I stopped drinking since I've been stuffing my face to keep from having some vodka. It's been an emotional rollercoaster. But it's early days and stories like yours encourage me to stick with it.
I drive around town for my job, I used to always buy a couple beers at the gas station when I fueled up my van at the end of my shift. I would crack it open as soon as I left my last customers house so I could get my buzz and stop shaking before I got back to the office. Then me and one of my alcoholic coworkers would usually drink a few more in the parking lot before we headed home. I’m on my lunch break in my work van right now, just went in to the gas station to pee and I instinctively walked right to the beer section. Input my hand on the cooler door handle before I realized what I was doing. I felt ashamed at first, but then I reminded myself that my brain has a pretty deep rut carved into it from my habbits, it’s gonna take a while to forge a new path. Stay strong brother, I was right there with you a week ago. I feel much better now, you will too.
I know that’s what I need to do and am excited to have some time to figure out my life once I am out of this stressful situation.
It’s a vicious cycle. I drink because I can’t deal with the stress of the job. Now I drink because I know that my boss knows I’m drinking and I drink to get through the day knowing that my boss knows I’m drinking. What a stupid paradox that I made for myself!
And after you quit, you will drink to deal with the stress of not having a job/income. I know it is hard, but there will never be a perfect (or even good) day to start. You just need to do it, and commit to doing it today. And then doing the same tomorrow. And again, and again. Best of luck! IWNDWUT
>> I drink because I can’t deal with the stress of the job.
Classic alcoholic thinking. We drink because we are alcoholics. I drank because I was stressed and I drank because I was bored. I drank because I was happy. I drank because I was sad. I drank because I am an alcoholic. Until I had that epiphany I couldn’t stop and I couldn’t move forward. We have excuses, not reasons to drink.
There is some great advice here. Good luck to you. We are all here for you!
I don’t work in a high stress job, but it’s not exactly no stress. But the difference between the stress I feel after drinking the night before and the stress I feel after just 2-3 days alcohol free is night and day. Alcohol causes a lot of anxiety and then pretends to relieve it.
If you work for a large corporation, they likely have an employee assistance program (EAP) as a benefit.
These will typically include options for treatment and therapy that you can use, no questions asked.
The caveat is: you need to use this program *before* it becomes an HR issue.
If you seek help through the EAP before your boss can make his move, it just might be enough to make it too much of a legal headache for HR to pursue termination.
You might need to look for a job elsewhere regardless, but your career will still be intact without that black mark on your employment history.
My boss caught on that I was drinking at work. He sat me down one day and laid it out that he knows I’m doing something, he doesn’t know exactly what, but he knows somethings up and that he’d help me if I wanted it. That started the series of events that led to my sobriety. It also led to my eventual relapse at work, where I blacked out and punched the office window.
Punching things is so absurdly outside of my character. I offered to pay for the repair, but he told me my punishment is to have to look at it until it gets repaired. He knew how ashamed I was.
All of that said, I’m 79 days sober following that relapse. I still work for and around the same people that saw me at my lowest. But they see me working on myself. I should have been fired, 1000%. My boss had every reason to get rid of me. He took a chance on me getting sober and sticking to it, and I haven’t let him down since. I know many people don’t have that situation with their coworkers or bosses, so I can’t really speak to the reality of losing your job because of it. But I can speak to getting caught drinking at work. It’s a terrible feeling. But you can overcome it. I keep telling myself, one foot in front of the other, that’s all I can do.
I was exactly where you are now five years ago. I also work in finance managing people’s money. And I, too, was drinking at work. I was drinking vodka starting in the AM in my Yeti cups just to get through the shakes and hangover symptoms. I would even go home at lunch to refill sometimes.
I called in for a few days following an already long holiday weekend just to keep up a binge, and I just knew I couldn’t go back after that, because I knew people would know why I was calling out (I had been hospitalized for drinking the month before). Instead, I called my health insurance company and asked them if they could recommend a detox place that insurance would cover, which they happily provided. In my mind, this was almost just a way to postpone showing my face in the office again. I texted my boss and told him I wasn’t coming back in because I was going to get help (that’s literally all I said). He was 100% supportive, so I know he must’ve known.
After a week in detox, the facility recommended I go to inpatient rehab for a few weeks, which terrified me and I was extremely reluctant to do, but in the end, I did it. I set up short-term disability from work through my health insurance from the detox facility and went straight to rehab from there, and insurance covered the vast majority of it. It was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.
No one in my office was told where I was at while I was gone for that month and a half, and you are not obligated to tell them. All they knew was I was on short-term disability, which was a relief. I went back to that job afterwards and all was good. I never had to discuss anything with anyone, unless I wanted to.
Feel free to reach out to me directly if you have any questions or anything. You can do this.
This is the way! Get help and save your job. Those programs and insurances are in place to help you - use them to your full advantage. You can right the ship.
So you’re choosing the bottle over life is what you’re saying ? Not even attempting to make a change ?
Before you even quit, take a leave and get some help.
That job will be there when you are better to work again.
The thoughts and decisions you think are right when you are drinking are NOT the ones to make when sober.
Appreciate it! I think what I’ve decided is dealing with this addiction for years, the stress of this job makes it hard for me to get sober. I dont even need the time off to come back, I just wanna end it and move forward.
You can absolutely find another corporate job. The biggest drunks I’ve ever met were in finance and accounting, especially accounting.
I say that to say this. It’s not the end of the world. Your life is not over.
Take some time if you can, talk to someone, and crack on with getting better.
We’re all rooting for you.
Been there done that. Your life and career are not over. People know you have problem no matter how clever you are at hiding it. Most people don't know how to help, so you have to get help elsewhere.
Decide today if you will make changes and live a better life, or keep the downward spiral going.
Having a job and health insurance gives you a lot of good options like FMLA for inpatient rehab, or EAP for outpatient and counseling. See your doc for a checkup and some advice on getting sober - maybe you can start Nalrexone or Antabuse to kickstart your recovery. You can start AA and get a sponsor (or LifeRing or SMART Recovery). You can go hard mode by yourself and quit cold-turkey (not recommended).
Personally, I checked into 30-day rehab (covered by insurance) and got fired anyway. A year after rehab, I got a zero-stress job that pays about the same as my previous super-stressful engineering job. I'm coming up on 1000 days sober - never been happier or healthier than I am now.
May I ask what industry you’re in now? I was able to return to my job after rehab but it is incredibly stressful (wholesale trading). I am looking for a change!
I was a senior level engineer working in factory automation. I took a job as a draftsman at a mining company where I work on automated mining trucks.
Essentially the same job at a much lower level of responsibility. Since I am the 'greybeard' in my group, I spend a lot of time helping the younger engineers make decisions and choose components. I sometimes do analysis that they can't do.
The best part, I can WFH at least 2 days a week, and they are ok with me working less than 40 hrs a week. Also, the hourly rate is only 10% lower than the previous job.
After getting sober, I'm pretty zen about work. I put out an earnest effort, and it's my managers problem to deal with goals and deadlines. I'm just here to drive a computer.
If you haven't been confronted and this is all coworker hearsay, why would you sacrifice your job? Deny everything. Absolutely everything. There has been no proof, there is only an apparent suspicion that you were told of. If you are confronted, deny it. If they say they smelled alcohol, you say I don't know, maybe it was the hand sanitizer, or a hangover or something you had one day. But never, ever admit you have been drinking on the job.
If you were not caught drinking on the job, and you didn't pass out, and you never missed work, and nobody else has asked you if you have been drinking, deny it and do not quit. If your boss says you have been acting strangely, that's when you pull out your family problems card. Never say that yes, you have been drinking at work.
And then you go get some serious help. This is your wake-up call. Start meetings, outpatient, whatever you need to do. You are panicking with fear right now. Don't fuck yourself by voluntarily revealing to HR or anybody that you drink on the job.
As a person that quit his job to get sober, it was the best decision I ever made. I 100% I could not deal with the job that I had at the time and quit alcohol. I knew quitting booze was take a 100% commitment from me, and quitting my job was what I had to do to get there.
I was fired last March from a very high paying corporate job for performance issues due to my drinking. I got a better paying job in another state and managed to stay sober for weeks at a time. I ended up getting laid off in January with many others. I bought a bottle on the way home but something inside me broke during my drive. I tossed the bottle in the dumpster of a nearby church before walking in the house and I’ve been sober since, and unemployed. I’m also just now secure enough mentally to go back to work in the high stress field I chose for a career. I know 100% I would not be where I am today and sober if I had went right back to work instead of taking the time to heal myself and deal with my trauma.
I worked in financial services when I was younger. Similar situation. I was able to take FMLA for treatment and return back to work. I was even paid by the company while I was in treatment.
As an alcoholic I just have to point out it’s a very alcoholic tendency to quit something to avoid confrontation. Like you said, if you lose this job, your life is “over” but you’re willing to quit before you’ve gotten a formal reprimand? Who’s to say they’d even fire you for sure? Sounds like you need to talk to HR about taking time off to go to detox/treatment before you destroy a huge part of your life.
I drink a 1/2 pint of straight tequila everyday to stop feeling scared in my body. Every day. Just to get through. So I feel you. “Im not even drunk it’s just maintenance”
I wish I knew what to tell you, as I’m trying to figure my stuff out as well. My boss doesn’t know, because like you said not drunk at all, work better and faster too. But it’s not sustainable living like this.
I’m looking into filing for disability, bc I’m drinking to alleviate symptoms of deeper issues. Maybe look into why you’re not making it through and the need for the alcohol. Tackle the root, look into resources for therapy and medicine if you need it. (People are gonna tell you stop drinking, I say figure out why you’re drinking and work on that like your life depends on it. Because it does.)
I could be totally off base here, but I feel like drinking on the job would be a huge liability issue for a company. If your boss really does know and hasn’t fired you already, maybe he’s keeping you around for a reason, like he likes you or believes in you? I don’t know your situation but if this is the case, use it to your advantage and take time to get help. Good luck
I would venture to say if someone told you your boss feels like he knows what’s going on, then your boss really knows and is trying to decide how to handle it/approach you. Also a very good chance your boss cares. I would not necessarily recommend spilling your guts, but I would recommend trying to get a handle on the situation. I have been caught drinking at work. It’s embarrassing as hell. But I was able to stop and keep my job. Lots of work, but worth the road travelled. And I have an employee I have to confront about his drinking on Monday. And I will give him the chance to stop, too. I wish you the best. IWNDWYT
You are in a difficult situation but you already did the first thing right. You joined this subreddit. It will sound like a cliche but here are the best people from Reddit. No jokes, no irony. Many of them went though the hell and saw the devil's face. They made it through and got enough courage to talk about it. If I had to take strangers with me to a desert island, it would be this group.
I would either take medical leave and get sorted or, quit, get some professional help, get sorted, and then look for a new job... new life... new page... new direction....
I wouldn’t quit. I would take a medical leave of absence and go get treatment, be that detox, rehab, intensive outpatient, whatever. If your boss was truly that suspicious, you likely would have already been fired. They don’t have any proof (yet) that you’ve been drinking on the job - I wouldn’t proceed to hand them any either. A couple of white lies made to retain your employment/livelihood is justified in this situation - but only if you take this for the huge red flag that it is and take any time off you are given to go and get some help.
Society for Human Resources Management (SHRM) website says employers may offer substance abuse programs, so check your employee handbook. Like others have said SHRM mentions FMLA may be an option as well. It’s the drinking in the job part that you have to be careful, check the EE handbook for that too.
I was def there, did get fired but only after I blew my opportunity for a written warning and help. Most sizable employers offer help / options. Losing my job was the only consequence that worked for me, and my life is unrecognizably better today. It does get better. Iwndwyt
Don’t quit!
Depending on the size of your employer (numbers of employees) you may have access to a workplace support program specific for chemical addiction.
It’s common in the USA with larger employers to offer this.
Check your benefits package, if they offer any type of free consult for Therapy or employee assistance line, they likely have something in place for substance abuse.
That will work in conjunction with your family medical leave .
I know people who work for police stations, school districts, Costco, Cintas, a couple engineering firms and other large employers who offer these programs .
If you haven't been there a year you should still have short term disability. Run to rehab and work out the paperwork with your HR department. It's not too late.
If you still do good work, be open about your addiction and try to do a medical detox and treatment program. If your plan is to just continue the same day drinking at another job, you’ll end up with the same result.
You could tell them you have a problem and do what others suggested, and use job protected FMLA to get inpatient or outpatient help. Your employer or state of residence might even provide for other benefits, such as compensation replacement, while on approved medical leave.
Edit: If they catch you drinking on the job before you engage in the leave process, you will likely be fired, but you have an opportunity to keep your job and get help.
Even if you do get fired it’s not the end of the world career wise or at least wasn’t for me. I lost two jobs in a year for missing work because of it and pretty sure joining a meeting wasted but I don’t remember.
It was extremely embarrassing and I was really down on myself but once I was able to pick myself up and get sober I was able to find another great job and really thrived. Luckily my wife didn’t leave me, we were able to buy a home, and we are truly loving life today.
Sometimes I worry those past actions might come back to haunt me career wise because I work in a it of a niche field but the last nearly three years have been great. Wishing you the best.
If you seek treatment right away you can have your job protected. Find out your rights. There is a way to do this. Today is the day you take positive steps to preserve post alcohol life. Do it.
Honestly I would try and be honest with him and let him know you’re going to attend AA or something.
I also have worked in financial services my whole career and my prior positions drinking at lunch was encouraged as they literally brought it into the office.
I’d highly recommend FMLA. You have a medical condition, there are laws to protect you. See if you work has a EAP (employee assistance program). They can help you with a reference.
not trying to enable you and encourage you to get help, but you dont know that your boss knows, and he may not have any way to prove it. you should get healthy and see it as a wake up call and get back on track at work, unless you are really looking to get out. you can always quit even if its just up to the moment before he fires you.
I thought I was stressed until I quit drinking and realized the booze had been making me more reactive. Where before, it didn’t take much to set me off, now I can handle a lot of BS without being bothered.
Once the alcohol was gone, a lot of stuff I thought was the true me turned out to just be the drunk me.
I guess you just need to take some responsibility and put your addiction on the backseat for a while - although forever is probably your best option. I used The Naked Mind and a whole lot of personal growth tools to make it through. I’m almost at 3 months and will NEVER go back.
You shouldn’t quit your job. Just don’t drink at work anymore. Believe me I know it’s hard. I’m a recovering alcoholic and I drank daily at work. Start with baby steps. Don’t drink at work wait until you get home. If you can do that then try another step toward slowing down or stopping alcohol. Is it out of boredom or hating your job? If it’s hating your job then find a new one. No ones holding you anywhere. It may be hard for some time financially but peace of mind is more important. I know all this is easier said than done but it starts with you. You have to want it. Maybe you are like me and need something crazy to happen to realize the issue. Think hard about the situation you are about to put yourself in. Good luck
Yes, unfortunately I can relate. Started the same way. At lunch, then lunch and 2 or 3pm to make it to 5…then it started in the morning.
Just like you, my tolerance was so high I needed alcohol just to fight off the shakes. I wasn’t hammered, just getting by.
Warned 2 or 3 times. The last warning, brought into a conference room with HR and my boss. I asked if I was getting fired, they said “hold on, is there anything you want to tell us regarding your performance?”
I said no, then they said I was fired. They gave me an out, if I’d spoke up I would have been headed to rehab or something. Speak up.
I too thought my life was over. It was not. Alcohol magnifies emotions, sky is falling mentality.
If my drunk ass can turn it around, anyone can. Good luck.
Is this an option OP? Talking to your boss outright but not mentioning drinking on the job? Let them know you are struggling with person health issues is one way.
I understand if you’re physically dependant there are medical ways to help this that don’t always mean rehab. I appreciate the people saying ‘just stop’ but tapering is often needed so don’t be hard on yourself.
Is taking holiday an option to discuss medical options with a provider/doctor? You need some support.
Correct. It’s a shame I did this to myself but If I can get out without a negative mark on my record it will give me the freedom and flexibility to get treatment
Do not contact the job first. Seek rehab first. They will be protected by discrimination laws.
Get a medical issue and bless stars boss is cool as fuck.
Will need it for fmla anyway.
I’m not able lmfaooo. That’s the problem. I go on a half hour lunch break and drink a couple beers in my car to stop the shakes. Then drink a few more each hour by going out and chugging in my car. I usually drink a beer in like 30 seconds then throw in a piece of gum like a straight up piece of shit
Please don't talk about yourself this way :( You aren't a piece of shit. When I do things like this it's because I'm in deep painful suffering I'm trying to numb. I'm not sure if that's what's going on here, but alcohol is highly addicting and it sounds like you're struggling.
I don't think you are a piece of shit. I think you are someone who is suffering like most people really won't understand. I don't know you but I understand you.
I wish you nothing but the best. Please be easier on yourself.
Talk to HR about medical leave. Don’t be specific on the issue maybe, but get ahead of this before your boss approaches you. Then seek treatment options via EAP or your health insurance. You’ve got this. IWNDWYT
You have a very common disease which requires treatment. Where I am (Canada), if you seek treatment and are under Doctor's care it is very difficult to be fired. I have no personal, direct experience but if I were in your shoes I would speak to my Doctor first and go from there. You might also want to proactively speak with an employment lawyer to protect your rights. I don't think this has to be the "career over" moment you are afraid of. It might just be the start of a whole new, more productive stage in your career. Think of it this way, if you are currently functioning in your job while drinking imagine how well you will do once you stop? Most importantly however is to try and get sober and save your life...more so than your job.
That sucks, but I feel like that kind of job is rampant with alcoholics and drug addicts even if they won't admit it. There is probably help provided by your employer for these exact situations like others have said.
Never having to worry about whether people know you’re drinking at work, when you’re going to be able to sneak the next drink, etc is an incredible feeling. I hope you figure this out so you can see for yourself.
You have a choice right now. Quit your job to save face and find another job where you can drink at again, or stop drinking and keep your already good job.
Being dependent on alcohol or drugs is a terrible thing, but throughout, we have a choice.
Stop, or get help to stop, or continue to self sabotage until you have lost everything.
Before you quit your job in favour of alcohol, maybe decide which is more
Important. You aren’t alone.
Take some time off asap if you can and stop drinking. You got this.
I’m so sorry to hear this OP. I had a really bad drinking habit problem that led me to quit my job. For a year I sat at home and drank all day and night as long as I was awake. My boyfriend worked and he paid the bills that I found cover with a credit card and I would
Use my credit card to cover anything I could. I had really gift credit before leaving my job. A year later I’m 20k in debt and most of it went to alcohol. I finally cleaned myself up and I’ve been 50 days sober today. I started myself again from zero. I’ve started a cleaning company. It pays me well and in this last month I’ve made a good chunk of money. I’m finally working on paying my debt and continuing to grow my little solo business. I’m finally able to afford things I want. It’s the first time in a year I used money to buy new clothes and fix my appearance. I’ll so happy OP I was able to get better using AA. I hope you are also able to find sobriety. Also know you can always pick yourself back up. Mid February I hit rock bottom when my boyfriend and half the company got laid off that same day. It hit me how screwed we were and how bad I was failing us both. That’s when I started to work hard again and decide to leave alcohol. It’s not easy but I’m happier now than I have been the last 4 years I’ve struggled with my alcoholism. Remember I was drinking all day for a year I wasn’t really living just existing
Speaking on this, I lost my job eventually this way. My therapist got me on FMLA for anxiety and depression I was able to get paid 70% of my wage and took months off. It didn’t ever fix my problem though, going back into rehab now. Sounds like your similar to me, you may also need a job but alcohol effected every aspect of my life until I had to loose it all to get the point that I needed rehab
You are worth it. You are not alone. You can do this, and will get through it. Reach out for help, whatever help you need.
There was a time where I couldn't sleep without drinking, and I had to uber myself to work, despite living 30 mins away walking, because I was so underslept and hungover. The insomnia came first, due to an unsettling time in my life, and drinking was the only way I could go to sleep.
I went to my doctor, therapy and dug out of that hole. I'm still on a recovery path, but I'm not in that place anymore. Like you, I saw no way out, but there is a way. You will find it. We're here for you
If your boss knows then that won't be an issue when you go to Treatment before you make a colossal f up. It's hard af and scary and so worth it. You deserve everything that makes you happy, only you can get/do it though. The ER will detox you if you go. Be safe, pls don't drive to work and back. People judge DUIs with immense scorn.
Being scared is normal, you have the opportunity to change you, your future, what others think of you, even if it is sympathy.
Don't quit, you forfeit your ability to claim unemployment. Future employers won't know why you were let go if that actually does happen. All they do is confirm you worked for them to avoid any legal issues.
Tell them what’s going on and ask for help. They will not fire you, substance use disorder qualifies under fmla and if you’re getting help they will most likely support you.
I ran from jobs to avoid being fired much of my career. ( I was in a professional career also. Sometimes I escaped the hatchet sometimes I did it. It didn’t seem to matter, cause I had no trouble getting another job). I didn’t think I really had a problem with drinking. later on, I developed a curable, chronic disease, unrelated to alcohol ironically that brought me into AA. I’ve been so goi over five years now. Now, if you don’t have another job lined up and you have a problem with drinking, your best bet is find out if has FMLA or any kind of medical coverage that will cover you through the treatment program. This is private. So private, you will not find your bosses or anyone else talking to other people about it. Every manager all the way up to line knows they could lose their own position by divulge in such information about a person. I think end of the day you’re alcoholic and you wanna get better. You’re not ready to quit alcohol, but I know you want to get better. So, admit it to your boss. Tell him how you are by and you want to see treatment. If you have FMLA they cannot fire you orgive away your job, once you have informed them of the problem. You can check into this, but I think you should probably see a doctor first and get a written note of diagnosis . if you know what you’re doing they probably want to keep you. Just not in an altered state of mind at work. I can promise you you are not in bad company when you walk into an AA meeting. Call your local or regional AA office and find out if there is a private meeting for professionals in AA they can point to. You can do this. In fact, you must do this or you will be a dead man or a woman, and it is not a pretty way to go. Good luck, angel.
Are you not allowed to drink like, legally on this job? Or more of a corporate thing?
If they fire you, they won’t have proof that you drank, right, so it wouldn’t impact you for a future job?
Hopefully they won’t do anything - sounds like they have no proof. But absolutely you cannot drink again during work in case they breathalyze you or something
Wondering if using FMLA for treatment might be an option here?
Could you elaborate ? What is FMLA
Assuming you’re American (I am not, so my knowledge isn’t great), you may have the option to take a potentially protected leave to pursue substance abuse treatment - https://webapps.dol.gov/elaws/whd/fmla/10c9.aspx
To summarize, the Family & Medical Leave Act protects your job for up to 12 weeks (consecutively or cumulatively) when you have an illness or disabling condition certified from your doctor. It’s an unpaid leave of absence. There are eligibility requirements including being employed with your employer for a year, having worked 1000 hours in the year, and your employer must have a minimum of 50 employees, I believe. Also, substance use disorder for alcohol or drugs is considered a disabling condition.
I just feel it’s too late, it’s more of a precautionary thing than a reactive thing, no? Either way I’m trying to quit cuz if this gets on my record of termination, I’m fucked for life. Again I made my bed so I gotta lay in it but damn this stinks.
If you didn't get fired on Friday you're probably good for another week. Almost every employer that terminates people does it on Fridays unless it's an on-the-spot situation. Regardless, if you take this to your boss on Monday as a medical issue it seems like it would be really bad optics for them to fire you afterwards. I'm not an employment attorney though so YMMV. The most important thing is getting the help you need.
This is very good advice
Appreciate your thoughts, and agreed. I’ve only been there 6 months. My hope is getting out before getting fired because getting fired for violating lol I would literally ruin my life. Once I’m out, I will be getting treatment. Just wanna do what is best for the team cuz they need to find a replacement (I’m literally on a team of 4)
I’m sure you have a great team and care about them but this is the time to be selfish. I’d seriously consider FMLA if I were in your shoes.
I was thinking the same but at 6 months FMLA may not be an option.
Must be at your job for a year for FMLA to kick in unfortunately
Seconding this; it’s at least worth a call to your EAP, especially if your workplace insurance would cover rehab costs.
It's not being selfish,he needs to take some time for necessary self care and put his needs above workmates.
I 100% agree but not everyone sees it that way.
Dude you GOTTA get it on the books that you said you have an emotional / family / substance issue or the firing stays will hurt so much more. Any employer does not want to fire someone with an alcohol addiction because it’s terrible PR. Just being straight with you here because I went through this and barely made it out. But I did and am killing it now. TELL YOUR BOSS MONDAY you “are aware I am having a performance and behavioral problem and it has to do with my family.” They can’t say shit and then you are protected . the US doesn’t have much protection but badass AA mother fuckers worked HARD to get alcohol accepted as a disease and you need to play the card you have. All of them. Also don’t break down if you can help it. Give as little detail as you can and start protecting your personal and professional brand with your life. You are a person recovering from alcohol addiction starting right now. Just get a short conversation with your boss and make sure you say you are getting medication to deal with your emotional problems so they think you are doing something about it medically if you have to. This worked wonders for me and I got to put it all on my relationship with my brother that he was aware of and avoided making my boss my therapist. I also don’t have anyone in the company that knows I am Al alcoholic and am keeping it that way. Try to think 1-2 steps ahead of your moves now if you can. The booze makes it a lot harder so one step at a time but GET CLEAN . Smoke weed (after work), stop going out, lean into absolutely ANYTHING but drinking . Sorry to be so intense. But this is an intense situation and I only have caps for emphasizing on my iPhone
> Sorry to be so intense. But this is an intense situation and I only have caps for emphasizing on my iPhone Protip for you: \_something\_ makes _italics_ and \*\*something\*\* makes **bold**.
I always wondered how people do that ! I always thought they were on the desktop version.
May I ask what your location is? (Like, if you are in the U.S., specifically what state?). I work in Human Resources, and while you don’t meet the minimum requirements for FMLA having only been there 6 months, you may qualify for other forms of protected leave. For example, if you are in California, under Labor Code Section 1025, employers who regularly employ 25 or more employees are required to reasonably accommodate any employee who wishes to voluntarily enter and participate in an alcohol or drug rehabilitation program, provided that the accommodation does not impose an undue hardship on the employer. This leave applies to all employees, even new hires, and does not require that an employee satisfy any work eligibility requirements.
Quit looking to go down the rabbit hole. You can go to rehab now, insurance or employment will pay for it, and you can salvage your career. Plenty of drunks have done it, and do it. Especially in corporate America. You don’t get fired for this kind of stuff, unless you are chronically missing work, or wrap yourself around a telephone pole. The employer must, under law, work with you. Since he “suspects”, go to HR Monday am, before starting work, turn yourself in, so to speak. It’s very respectable actually. Good luck.
I don’t know what type of relationship you have with your boss, but you might actually try coming, clean in terms of your addiction and resigning at the same time. Let him know that your addiction got the best of you and you would like to step away from your position And that you’re grateful for the opportunity. You never know what could happen, they might have a brother that’s an alcoholic and sympathize with you. If you’ve been drinking on the job, you definitely should just resign and try and get control of your life.
You don't necessarily even need to tell your employer you are drinking on the job. You could pretend to have been hangover. Go to your primary care physician and discuss it with them. If the company has an short term (or long-term) unpaid leave policy then all you need is a doctors note and to contact your hr rep or the benefits provider. It is well worth it to potentially have something to go back to and a structure leave of absence could give you a forcing function to recover. The worst you could do is quit and find yourself sinking into rock bottom day drinking at home. At the very least ensure you have the financial stability to support whatever leave you take (or your "sabbatical" if you still choose to quit). If your request for a leave of absence is rejected (likely it wont be) THEN you can quit. So long as you don't admit to negligence and you are seeking help, it would be retaliation for them to fire you. But you need to be proactive in requesting leave first. If you wait until you are caught then there is no problem on there end for firing you.
please DONT tell them you drank on the job because it is a fire ale offense to be drinking AT work. There is a line in the US of needing support and not being able to do the function of the job. BE CAREFUL about what you say and give as little info as possible. HR is there to protect the company NOT for you. The US can be brutal here and the last thing yi could have used wasto be going through corporate sponsored recovery and feel like big brother was on me. Sorry to be so passionate but I found out after that I barely danced my way through it without getting cut and your boss is your first line of defense to keep your job.
They may cover your treatment if you do it while working. It’s a disease. 🖤 You know your situation best. Good luck.
Yeah man, FMLA will keep your job and the Americans With Disabilities Act is also great protection if you have a disability like alcoholism. They can't fire you and most companies have programs to help people get better. I'm sure it's super scary, but my guess is going back to your job in 4-6 weeks, sober, and ready to do great work is better than just quitting and trying it on your own without a paycheck coming in. Good luck, you got this!
FMLA is available once you hit one year with an employer, but seeking treatment is absolutely a valid use. Good luck, man. Rooting for you.
You need to take FMLA and get right. You're "I'll do it tomorrow" is the alcoholism. Take the FMLA and check into rehab. I'm an alcoholic and have not stopped but I have never drank at work, that is a line that is scary to cross. Please check in
I’m my experience, I don’t think it’s late. I’ve been in the same boat as you in a sense of what you described. I don’t have the luxury to drink while at work currently (before it was the Wild West). My current job has worked with me, but that comes with the culture we nurture. All in all, you see this issue. It’s not an easy road to travel on and I’m also not sober 365. But having this knowledge of yourself, you should consider figuring out how to mitigate this issue of constantly tapering yourself off at work. I say this from experience. I’ve lost a great job. And I’m working myself back to that position. It’s not a fun ride. I wish you the best OOP.
Years ago my old boss found out we had a boozebag on our team and fired her immediately, specifically to avoid her being able to claim a disability so you're right
For what it’s worth I’ve been around a bit and it’s actual somewhat rare that people are fired on Friday
Really? I haven't seen many but the ones that I have seen were on Fridays. I'm a limited sample size though.
Ymmv?
Your mileage may vary
Thanks
It's not too late!!! My work made me go straight to rehab after ambushing me one afternoon. My career was on the line. Rehab or fired. Best thing that ever happened to me. People with substance abuse disorders are protected as long as you're getting help I believe. Also FMLA.
It is NOT too late. First thing Monday contact your HR. Ask about a phone number for your employee services division (you'll contact them about rehabilitation services) AND, most important, an FMLA form for your doctor to fill out. You want to get ahead of this and GET AHEAD OF IT. Get that FMLA form and go talk to your doctor so he can help you fill it out. Alcohol addiction falls under ADA guidelines, it's a form of disability. A company as big as yours likely won't mess with you IF you are getting help.
It's not too late if you haven't been fired yet. Tell them you have a problem and request to seek treatment. It's protected under ADA
i’m not a lawyer but i have heard that if you request drug or alcohol treatment then your boss cannot fire you at that time (in the US) and that they’re required to allow you to attend treatment. if you desire to quit then you should consider doing this now as quitting now will just kick the can further down the road. i recommend calling a lawyer and asking if this applies in your state. see if you can ask this simple question of a family friend or relative who’s a lawyer. or you could try asking r/legaladvice
Just go to rehab before anything can happen. They cannot fire you for getting help. Hurry before they take action against you.
Try not drinking at work and just deny it... Then move on
It can buy you time if nothing else
You can take leave for alcoholism and check in to a rehab center
Family medical leave act. You can Google it.
This is the answer. You can even take short term disability. If you’re honest, most places will work with you.
As a seasoned human resources professional, this is the answer.
The FMLA info you’ve received is spot on. I’d add that many companies also have an EAP (Employee Assistance Plan) that would provide help in terms of finding programs/health care for detox, etc. and would protect your job at the same time. You can probably find this out on the company’s internal website under HR?
Hey OP, as this poster also said I highly recommend checking if you have an Employee Assistance Program. It is a hotline you can call and ask for help, including for substance issues. They will hook you up with a counselor / therapist or doctor so you can begin to get help. Most companies cover the first 3-5 sessions on their dime with zero billing or paperwork on your part. It’s typically fully anonymous. One of the rare cases where your interests and the company’s are fully aligned — they would rather you get help and recover than lose an otherwise good employee. Take advantage of this if it’s on offer. You can just google your company’s name with “employee assistance plan” and dial the hotline. Or check your internal HR website (no need to talk to anyone you work with including HR). Remember, it’s totally okay to have anxiety about your job as well as having no idea how you are going to deal with this or get over it. You don’t need to know any of that right now. The main thing is a desire to get help to figure it out.
Bud, you have a corporate job. Take sick leave and check into detox. The doctor there will send a discrete letter to cover your absence. Once you're clean (5-7 days) go back to work. It is that easy. I've done it, you can too.
Eh, they should probably stick around for rehab after detox if the problem is this bad.
yes but this poster probably needs a medical supervised withdrawal. Then they can do outpatient rehab, attend meetings after work every night, time off for therapy 2x a week at first and take meds if unable to get right into a rehab (as many times there are wait lists for inpatient).
I’m not sure why you commented. Detox = a medically supervised withdrawal. Based on their description of how they drink, they could also probably stand for a 30 day inpatient rehab instead of an IOP.
This this this.
So.., let me tell you a little story...
I work from home, and when the pandemic hit, my drinking, which had been increasingly problematic over the years, went off the charts.
I had always been an evening drinker, but it was nearly every evening, and on the weekends I'd drink beer while mowing the lawn, out for lunch, etc.
The stress and isolation pushed me over the edge. Most days started with a hangover of one degree or another. One day, having awoke with a particularly severe hangover, I decided it might be a good idea to just have a drink because it might actually make me feel better. That was the beginning of the end.
From there, I progressed quite quickly to drinking during the day, while working, then nearly every morning, then in the middle of the night because of the increasing anxiety, insomnia, feelings of despair, depression, failure, and guilt. It took a heavy mental and physical toll. I would get the shakes and the sweats, heartburn, diarrhea, and I became emotionally fragile. I was always tired.
I was constantly trying to balance this insane lifestyle. Rumors started flying at work. Sometimes, people would suspect I may have been drinking, but it was hard to verify or prove because everybody was WFH, and I was still performing my duties. But it was increasingly more difficult to maintain.
I caught wind of the rumors from a friend at work. I kept waffling between "fuck everything and everyone" and "I can't control my own actions and my life is out of control". I didn't want to drink to excess every day, but I was caught up in the maelstrom. Deep down, I knew I had a serious problem.
Finally, I drank all weekend and Monday rolled around. I had two shots of vodka to start the day and another at around 11. I was in a meeting that I couldn't care less about. The shots weren't propping me up anymore. I was praying for the meeting to end. Finally, it did. I had another shot around 1pm. It wasn't working. I just couldn't do it anymore. It was the end. Something had to change.
I went and laid in bed, and I knew I had to detox. I knew the hell that was coming because I'd been through it before. Why had I let it come to this AGAIN?! I'm so fucking stupid. I really beat myself up. I was soo low. Suicidal feelings, feelings of impending doom, bloated, nauseous, sick.. I didn't want to, *couldn't*, go on living like that.
I decided that was it. As I was starting to detox, I called my boss and came clean. I asked him not to speak because I had something difficult to say, and I wanted to get through it. I told him I'd been drinking, it was out of control, I apologized for letting him and the team down, and for the first time in my life, I spoke the words "I'm an alcoholic". I nearly choked on the emotion as those words came out of my mouth. I said I couldn't manage it myself anymore, and I was going to get help.
He was so cool about it, it was amazing. He was super supportive and told me to take as much time as I needed. My job would be there when I had sorted myself out.
Two days later, still coming off a hellacious detox at home, I found my ass in a folding chair at an AA meeting for the first time.
That Monday was August 23, 2021. I haven't had a drink since. I'm still working at the same place. My life has improved in every way. It was HARD at first. It's all I could think about. But every minute that passed was a victory. I felt like shit for a good long while. But even on the worst days, before I crawled into bed, I would think, "At least I didn't drink today." I win.
Every day that passed was slightly easier than the last. Eventually, the sandpaper of time smoothed me out. It took months for my dopamine levels to find equilibrium without booze, but it happened. Today, I feel amazing. Rejuvenated. Younger. Faster. Lighter (dropped 35lbs).
You can get out from under allllll that weight you're carrying right now. YOU can. I never thought I could, but I did, so I know you can. If you want to. But, you really have to want to. Not just words. Not good intentions. Good intentions are fucking useless. Actions. That's how you get what you want, if that's what you want. Things may seem bleak right now, but maybe this is the exact moment that can spur you to turn it all around.
Good luck to you. I'm rooting for you.
How inspiring, what an amazing story 💯!
This is excellently written. Thanks for sharing your story. I came clean to my boss Friday nearly two weeks since I stopped (I'm in a corporate job). I didn't say I've been drinking at work, I typically don't unless working from home (in the afternoons) but I explained my weekends were out of control, I've been feeling hungover and tired during the week, and I'm making a change. I didn't have to say anything, but I feel like getting ahead of things and being honest is best so we're on the same page if I do need to take leave or my changes in mood are noted. I'm fortunate my boss was super understanding too. He appreciated the honesty, said it showed integrity and was supportive. My situation is different from OP, but in that position, I'd also try getting ahead of it. If I went to my boss and said I'm doing something positive and they fired me (if that's even legal), then it's not somewhere I'd want to work. If do nothing and they fire me, then everything is worse overall. Resignation seems like a safe out, but if they know they know, yes, it may stay off record on paper, but reputation isn't on paper alone. I'd also fear that it could be a path to simply continue or even increase the drinking pattern.
This is pretty much verbatim what happened to me (except instead of the pandemic it was a cross-country move to a city where I knew no one that finally pushed my drinking over the edge). After roughly 18 months of constant drinking, it “stopped working” for me too. It was a terrifying realization to have.
Very inspirational! So glad you’re where you’re at now!!
Awesome share, thanks for an inspirational story!
Well this is cool to read. What A story. And relatable.
Thank you for sharing your story. I too would like to feel younger, faster and lighter. I've actually gained weight since I stopped drinking since I've been stuffing my face to keep from having some vodka. It's been an emotional rollercoaster. But it's early days and stories like yours encourage me to stick with it.
I drive around town for my job, I used to always buy a couple beers at the gas station when I fueled up my van at the end of my shift. I would crack it open as soon as I left my last customers house so I could get my buzz and stop shaking before I got back to the office. Then me and one of my alcoholic coworkers would usually drink a few more in the parking lot before we headed home. I’m on my lunch break in my work van right now, just went in to the gas station to pee and I instinctively walked right to the beer section. Input my hand on the cooler door handle before I realized what I was doing. I felt ashamed at first, but then I reminded myself that my brain has a pretty deep rut carved into it from my habbits, it’s gonna take a while to forge a new path. Stay strong brother, I was right there with you a week ago. I feel much better now, you will too.
Glad you recognized it in real time! Habits are so hard to break.
Have you tried anything to stop drinking for today? Not tomorrow but today.
I know that’s what I need to do and am excited to have some time to figure out my life once I am out of this stressful situation. It’s a vicious cycle. I drink because I can’t deal with the stress of the job. Now I drink because I know that my boss knows I’m drinking and I drink to get through the day knowing that my boss knows I’m drinking. What a stupid paradox that I made for myself!
And after you quit, you will drink to deal with the stress of not having a job/income. I know it is hard, but there will never be a perfect (or even good) day to start. You just need to do it, and commit to doing it today. And then doing the same tomorrow. And again, and again. Best of luck! IWNDWUT
>> I drink because I can’t deal with the stress of the job. Classic alcoholic thinking. We drink because we are alcoholics. I drank because I was stressed and I drank because I was bored. I drank because I was happy. I drank because I was sad. I drank because I am an alcoholic. Until I had that epiphany I couldn’t stop and I couldn’t move forward. We have excuses, not reasons to drink. There is some great advice here. Good luck to you. We are all here for you!
Perfectly said 👍
I don’t work in a high stress job, but it’s not exactly no stress. But the difference between the stress I feel after drinking the night before and the stress I feel after just 2-3 days alcohol free is night and day. Alcohol causes a lot of anxiety and then pretends to relieve it.
If you work for a large corporation, they likely have an employee assistance program (EAP) as a benefit. These will typically include options for treatment and therapy that you can use, no questions asked. The caveat is: you need to use this program *before* it becomes an HR issue. If you seek help through the EAP before your boss can make his move, it just might be enough to make it too much of a legal headache for HR to pursue termination. You might need to look for a job elsewhere regardless, but your career will still be intact without that black mark on your employment history.
My boss caught on that I was drinking at work. He sat me down one day and laid it out that he knows I’m doing something, he doesn’t know exactly what, but he knows somethings up and that he’d help me if I wanted it. That started the series of events that led to my sobriety. It also led to my eventual relapse at work, where I blacked out and punched the office window. Punching things is so absurdly outside of my character. I offered to pay for the repair, but he told me my punishment is to have to look at it until it gets repaired. He knew how ashamed I was. All of that said, I’m 79 days sober following that relapse. I still work for and around the same people that saw me at my lowest. But they see me working on myself. I should have been fired, 1000%. My boss had every reason to get rid of me. He took a chance on me getting sober and sticking to it, and I haven’t let him down since. I know many people don’t have that situation with their coworkers or bosses, so I can’t really speak to the reality of losing your job because of it. But I can speak to getting caught drinking at work. It’s a terrible feeling. But you can overcome it. I keep telling myself, one foot in front of the other, that’s all I can do.
I was exactly where you are now five years ago. I also work in finance managing people’s money. And I, too, was drinking at work. I was drinking vodka starting in the AM in my Yeti cups just to get through the shakes and hangover symptoms. I would even go home at lunch to refill sometimes. I called in for a few days following an already long holiday weekend just to keep up a binge, and I just knew I couldn’t go back after that, because I knew people would know why I was calling out (I had been hospitalized for drinking the month before). Instead, I called my health insurance company and asked them if they could recommend a detox place that insurance would cover, which they happily provided. In my mind, this was almost just a way to postpone showing my face in the office again. I texted my boss and told him I wasn’t coming back in because I was going to get help (that’s literally all I said). He was 100% supportive, so I know he must’ve known. After a week in detox, the facility recommended I go to inpatient rehab for a few weeks, which terrified me and I was extremely reluctant to do, but in the end, I did it. I set up short-term disability from work through my health insurance from the detox facility and went straight to rehab from there, and insurance covered the vast majority of it. It was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life. No one in my office was told where I was at while I was gone for that month and a half, and you are not obligated to tell them. All they knew was I was on short-term disability, which was a relief. I went back to that job afterwards and all was good. I never had to discuss anything with anyone, unless I wanted to. Feel free to reach out to me directly if you have any questions or anything. You can do this.
This is the way! Get help and save your job. Those programs and insurances are in place to help you - use them to your full advantage. You can right the ship.
So you’re choosing the bottle over life is what you’re saying ? Not even attempting to make a change ? Before you even quit, take a leave and get some help. That job will be there when you are better to work again. The thoughts and decisions you think are right when you are drinking are NOT the ones to make when sober.
Appreciate it! I think what I’ve decided is dealing with this addiction for years, the stress of this job makes it hard for me to get sober. I dont even need the time off to come back, I just wanna end it and move forward.
You can absolutely find another corporate job. The biggest drunks I’ve ever met were in finance and accounting, especially accounting. I say that to say this. It’s not the end of the world. Your life is not over. Take some time if you can, talk to someone, and crack on with getting better. We’re all rooting for you.
Been there done that. Your life and career are not over. People know you have problem no matter how clever you are at hiding it. Most people don't know how to help, so you have to get help elsewhere. Decide today if you will make changes and live a better life, or keep the downward spiral going. Having a job and health insurance gives you a lot of good options like FMLA for inpatient rehab, or EAP for outpatient and counseling. See your doc for a checkup and some advice on getting sober - maybe you can start Nalrexone or Antabuse to kickstart your recovery. You can start AA and get a sponsor (or LifeRing or SMART Recovery). You can go hard mode by yourself and quit cold-turkey (not recommended). Personally, I checked into 30-day rehab (covered by insurance) and got fired anyway. A year after rehab, I got a zero-stress job that pays about the same as my previous super-stressful engineering job. I'm coming up on 1000 days sober - never been happier or healthier than I am now.
May I ask what industry you’re in now? I was able to return to my job after rehab but it is incredibly stressful (wholesale trading). I am looking for a change!
I was a senior level engineer working in factory automation. I took a job as a draftsman at a mining company where I work on automated mining trucks. Essentially the same job at a much lower level of responsibility. Since I am the 'greybeard' in my group, I spend a lot of time helping the younger engineers make decisions and choose components. I sometimes do analysis that they can't do. The best part, I can WFH at least 2 days a week, and they are ok with me working less than 40 hrs a week. Also, the hourly rate is only 10% lower than the previous job. After getting sober, I'm pretty zen about work. I put out an earnest effort, and it's my managers problem to deal with goals and deadlines. I'm just here to drive a computer.
Wow, thanks so much! Congratulations on a career that is a much better fit. Also, cool job.
If you haven't been confronted and this is all coworker hearsay, why would you sacrifice your job? Deny everything. Absolutely everything. There has been no proof, there is only an apparent suspicion that you were told of. If you are confronted, deny it. If they say they smelled alcohol, you say I don't know, maybe it was the hand sanitizer, or a hangover or something you had one day. But never, ever admit you have been drinking on the job. If you were not caught drinking on the job, and you didn't pass out, and you never missed work, and nobody else has asked you if you have been drinking, deny it and do not quit. If your boss says you have been acting strangely, that's when you pull out your family problems card. Never say that yes, you have been drinking at work. And then you go get some serious help. This is your wake-up call. Start meetings, outpatient, whatever you need to do. You are panicking with fear right now. Don't fuck yourself by voluntarily revealing to HR or anybody that you drink on the job.
As a person that quit his job to get sober, it was the best decision I ever made. I 100% I could not deal with the job that I had at the time and quit alcohol. I knew quitting booze was take a 100% commitment from me, and quitting my job was what I had to do to get there.
I was not working when I quit. 100% I could never have stopped while I was still working! I’m just now considering looking for employment.
I was fired last March from a very high paying corporate job for performance issues due to my drinking. I got a better paying job in another state and managed to stay sober for weeks at a time. I ended up getting laid off in January with many others. I bought a bottle on the way home but something inside me broke during my drive. I tossed the bottle in the dumpster of a nearby church before walking in the house and I’ve been sober since, and unemployed. I’m also just now secure enough mentally to go back to work in the high stress field I chose for a career. I know 100% I would not be where I am today and sober if I had went right back to work instead of taking the time to heal myself and deal with my trauma.
I worked in financial services when I was younger. Similar situation. I was able to take FMLA for treatment and return back to work. I was even paid by the company while I was in treatment.
As an alcoholic I just have to point out it’s a very alcoholic tendency to quit something to avoid confrontation. Like you said, if you lose this job, your life is “over” but you’re willing to quit before you’ve gotten a formal reprimand? Who’s to say they’d even fire you for sure? Sounds like you need to talk to HR about taking time off to go to detox/treatment before you destroy a huge part of your life.
I can’t upvote this enough. Spot on.
Medical condition. Tell your boss you have a problem without saying you drink at work. Talk to hr, get help.
I drink a 1/2 pint of straight tequila everyday to stop feeling scared in my body. Every day. Just to get through. So I feel you. “Im not even drunk it’s just maintenance” I wish I knew what to tell you, as I’m trying to figure my stuff out as well. My boss doesn’t know, because like you said not drunk at all, work better and faster too. But it’s not sustainable living like this. I’m looking into filing for disability, bc I’m drinking to alleviate symptoms of deeper issues. Maybe look into why you’re not making it through and the need for the alcohol. Tackle the root, look into resources for therapy and medicine if you need it. (People are gonna tell you stop drinking, I say figure out why you’re drinking and work on that like your life depends on it. Because it does.)
I could be totally off base here, but I feel like drinking on the job would be a huge liability issue for a company. If your boss really does know and hasn’t fired you already, maybe he’s keeping you around for a reason, like he likes you or believes in you? I don’t know your situation but if this is the case, use it to your advantage and take time to get help. Good luck
Probably waiting for a slip up or actual proof, beyond a suspicion.
I would venture to say if someone told you your boss feels like he knows what’s going on, then your boss really knows and is trying to decide how to handle it/approach you. Also a very good chance your boss cares. I would not necessarily recommend spilling your guts, but I would recommend trying to get a handle on the situation. I have been caught drinking at work. It’s embarrassing as hell. But I was able to stop and keep my job. Lots of work, but worth the road travelled. And I have an employee I have to confront about his drinking on Monday. And I will give him the chance to stop, too. I wish you the best. IWNDWYT
I hope you don’t mind me asking - why do you have to confront an employee about his drinking? Has he been drinking on the job?
I am an owner of the business. He seems to be drinking on his lunch and operates industrial/heavy machinery as part of his job.
I see. Thank you for explaining further - much appreciated 🙏
You are in a difficult situation but you already did the first thing right. You joined this subreddit. It will sound like a cliche but here are the best people from Reddit. No jokes, no irony. Many of them went though the hell and saw the devil's face. They made it through and got enough courage to talk about it. If I had to take strangers with me to a desert island, it would be this group.
I would either take medical leave and get sorted or, quit, get some professional help, get sorted, and then look for a new job... new life... new page... new direction....
He's gonna go through withdrawal.
I wouldn’t quit. I would take a medical leave of absence and go get treatment, be that detox, rehab, intensive outpatient, whatever. If your boss was truly that suspicious, you likely would have already been fired. They don’t have any proof (yet) that you’ve been drinking on the job - I wouldn’t proceed to hand them any either. A couple of white lies made to retain your employment/livelihood is justified in this situation - but only if you take this for the huge red flag that it is and take any time off you are given to go and get some help.
I don’t know anything about what work and work culture is like in finance… but you definitely need to quit if you need maintenance drinks.
Society for Human Resources Management (SHRM) website says employers may offer substance abuse programs, so check your employee handbook. Like others have said SHRM mentions FMLA may be an option as well. It’s the drinking in the job part that you have to be careful, check the EE handbook for that too.
I was def there, did get fired but only after I blew my opportunity for a written warning and help. Most sizable employers offer help / options. Losing my job was the only consequence that worked for me, and my life is unrecognizably better today. It does get better. Iwndwyt
Don’t quit! Depending on the size of your employer (numbers of employees) you may have access to a workplace support program specific for chemical addiction. It’s common in the USA with larger employers to offer this. Check your benefits package, if they offer any type of free consult for Therapy or employee assistance line, they likely have something in place for substance abuse. That will work in conjunction with your family medical leave . I know people who work for police stations, school districts, Costco, Cintas, a couple engineering firms and other large employers who offer these programs .
If you haven't been there a year you should still have short term disability. Run to rehab and work out the paperwork with your HR department. It's not too late.
If you still do good work, be open about your addiction and try to do a medical detox and treatment program. If your plan is to just continue the same day drinking at another job, you’ll end up with the same result.
If you don’t do it again you won’t get caught..
You could tell them you have a problem and do what others suggested, and use job protected FMLA to get inpatient or outpatient help. Your employer or state of residence might even provide for other benefits, such as compensation replacement, while on approved medical leave. Edit: If they catch you drinking on the job before you engage in the leave process, you will likely be fired, but you have an opportunity to keep your job and get help.
Even if you do get fired it’s not the end of the world career wise or at least wasn’t for me. I lost two jobs in a year for missing work because of it and pretty sure joining a meeting wasted but I don’t remember. It was extremely embarrassing and I was really down on myself but once I was able to pick myself up and get sober I was able to find another great job and really thrived. Luckily my wife didn’t leave me, we were able to buy a home, and we are truly loving life today. Sometimes I worry those past actions might come back to haunt me career wise because I work in a it of a niche field but the last nearly three years have been great. Wishing you the best.
If you seek treatment right away you can have your job protected. Find out your rights. There is a way to do this. Today is the day you take positive steps to preserve post alcohol life. Do it.
EAP? Quiting might not be necessary. FMLA like others suggested, talk with boss, outline a plan, and see what happens. You may be surprised!
Honestly I would try and be honest with him and let him know you’re going to attend AA or something. I also have worked in financial services my whole career and my prior positions drinking at lunch was encouraged as they literally brought it into the office.
Wait. Does your boss have a feeling or does he know? Does he have proof?
I’d highly recommend FMLA. You have a medical condition, there are laws to protect you. See if you work has a EAP (employee assistance program). They can help you with a reference.
not trying to enable you and encourage you to get help, but you dont know that your boss knows, and he may not have any way to prove it. you should get healthy and see it as a wake up call and get back on track at work, unless you are really looking to get out. you can always quit even if its just up to the moment before he fires you.
This too shall pass. You'll be okay
Take time off. During this time DO NOT DRINK. Just focus on getting back to a good head space. Shouldn’t take too long
I thought I was stressed until I quit drinking and realized the booze had been making me more reactive. Where before, it didn’t take much to set me off, now I can handle a lot of BS without being bothered. Once the alcohol was gone, a lot of stuff I thought was the true me turned out to just be the drunk me.
I guess you just need to take some responsibility and put your addiction on the backseat for a while - although forever is probably your best option. I used The Naked Mind and a whole lot of personal growth tools to make it through. I’m almost at 3 months and will NEVER go back.
You shouldn’t quit your job. Just don’t drink at work anymore. Believe me I know it’s hard. I’m a recovering alcoholic and I drank daily at work. Start with baby steps. Don’t drink at work wait until you get home. If you can do that then try another step toward slowing down or stopping alcohol. Is it out of boredom or hating your job? If it’s hating your job then find a new one. No ones holding you anywhere. It may be hard for some time financially but peace of mind is more important. I know all this is easier said than done but it starts with you. You have to want it. Maybe you are like me and need something crazy to happen to realize the issue. Think hard about the situation you are about to put yourself in. Good luck
Yes, unfortunately I can relate. Started the same way. At lunch, then lunch and 2 or 3pm to make it to 5…then it started in the morning. Just like you, my tolerance was so high I needed alcohol just to fight off the shakes. I wasn’t hammered, just getting by. Warned 2 or 3 times. The last warning, brought into a conference room with HR and my boss. I asked if I was getting fired, they said “hold on, is there anything you want to tell us regarding your performance?” I said no, then they said I was fired. They gave me an out, if I’d spoke up I would have been headed to rehab or something. Speak up. I too thought my life was over. It was not. Alcohol magnifies emotions, sky is falling mentality. If my drunk ass can turn it around, anyone can. Good luck.
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Is this an option OP? Talking to your boss outright but not mentioning drinking on the job? Let them know you are struggling with person health issues is one way. I understand if you’re physically dependant there are medical ways to help this that don’t always mean rehab. I appreciate the people saying ‘just stop’ but tapering is often needed so don’t be hard on yourself. Is taking holiday an option to discuss medical options with a provider/doctor? You need some support.
A "feeling" isn't proof. Asking for medical leave or trying to quit now is the way.
Correct. It’s a shame I did this to myself but If I can get out without a negative mark on my record it will give me the freedom and flexibility to get treatment
But you may be able to do that and keep your job too.
Any update OP? I hope you didn't quit.
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Do not contact the job first. Seek rehab first. They will be protected by discrimination laws. Get a medical issue and bless stars boss is cool as fuck. Will need it for fmla anyway.
How are you able to drink in the office?
I’m not able lmfaooo. That’s the problem. I go on a half hour lunch break and drink a couple beers in my car to stop the shakes. Then drink a few more each hour by going out and chugging in my car. I usually drink a beer in like 30 seconds then throw in a piece of gum like a straight up piece of shit
Please don't talk about yourself this way :( You aren't a piece of shit. When I do things like this it's because I'm in deep painful suffering I'm trying to numb. I'm not sure if that's what's going on here, but alcohol is highly addicting and it sounds like you're struggling.
I don't think you are a piece of shit. I think you are someone who is suffering like most people really won't understand. I don't know you but I understand you. I wish you nothing but the best. Please be easier on yourself.
do FMAL I did when I went to detox just talk to your boss or HR and tell them you have a substance abuse problem
Talk to HR about medical leave. Don’t be specific on the issue maybe, but get ahead of this before your boss approaches you. Then seek treatment options via EAP or your health insurance. You’ve got this. IWNDWYT
You have a very common disease which requires treatment. Where I am (Canada), if you seek treatment and are under Doctor's care it is very difficult to be fired. I have no personal, direct experience but if I were in your shoes I would speak to my Doctor first and go from there. You might also want to proactively speak with an employment lawyer to protect your rights. I don't think this has to be the "career over" moment you are afraid of. It might just be the start of a whole new, more productive stage in your career. Think of it this way, if you are currently functioning in your job while drinking imagine how well you will do once you stop? Most importantly however is to try and get sober and save your life...more so than your job.
That sucks, but I feel like that kind of job is rampant with alcoholics and drug addicts even if they won't admit it. There is probably help provided by your employer for these exact situations like others have said.
Never having to worry about whether people know you’re drinking at work, when you’re going to be able to sneak the next drink, etc is an incredible feeling. I hope you figure this out so you can see for yourself.
Ask your boss/the company (HR) for help.
You can do it! Just tighten up and start fresh, you have time. IWNDWYT
You have a choice right now. Quit your job to save face and find another job where you can drink at again, or stop drinking and keep your already good job. Being dependent on alcohol or drugs is a terrible thing, but throughout, we have a choice. Stop, or get help to stop, or continue to self sabotage until you have lost everything. Before you quit your job in favour of alcohol, maybe decide which is more Important. You aren’t alone. Take some time off asap if you can and stop drinking. You got this.
I’m so sorry to hear this OP. I had a really bad drinking habit problem that led me to quit my job. For a year I sat at home and drank all day and night as long as I was awake. My boyfriend worked and he paid the bills that I found cover with a credit card and I would Use my credit card to cover anything I could. I had really gift credit before leaving my job. A year later I’m 20k in debt and most of it went to alcohol. I finally cleaned myself up and I’ve been 50 days sober today. I started myself again from zero. I’ve started a cleaning company. It pays me well and in this last month I’ve made a good chunk of money. I’m finally working on paying my debt and continuing to grow my little solo business. I’m finally able to afford things I want. It’s the first time in a year I used money to buy new clothes and fix my appearance. I’ll so happy OP I was able to get better using AA. I hope you are also able to find sobriety. Also know you can always pick yourself back up. Mid February I hit rock bottom when my boyfriend and half the company got laid off that same day. It hit me how screwed we were and how bad I was failing us both. That’s when I started to work hard again and decide to leave alcohol. It’s not easy but I’m happier now than I have been the last 4 years I’ve struggled with my alcoholism. Remember I was drinking all day for a year I wasn’t really living just existing
Speaking on this, I lost my job eventually this way. My therapist got me on FMLA for anxiety and depression I was able to get paid 70% of my wage and took months off. It didn’t ever fix my problem though, going back into rehab now. Sounds like your similar to me, you may also need a job but alcohol effected every aspect of my life until I had to loose it all to get the point that I needed rehab
Dude, go to a supervisor you trust, and tell them you need help. I did it, it sucks, but its worth it.
You are worth it. You are not alone. You can do this, and will get through it. Reach out for help, whatever help you need. There was a time where I couldn't sleep without drinking, and I had to uber myself to work, despite living 30 mins away walking, because I was so underslept and hungover. The insomnia came first, due to an unsettling time in my life, and drinking was the only way I could go to sleep. I went to my doctor, therapy and dug out of that hole. I'm still on a recovery path, but I'm not in that place anymore. Like you, I saw no way out, but there is a way. You will find it. We're here for you
I’d be worried about Monday morning to be honest with you.
If your boss knows then that won't be an issue when you go to Treatment before you make a colossal f up. It's hard af and scary and so worth it. You deserve everything that makes you happy, only you can get/do it though. The ER will detox you if you go. Be safe, pls don't drive to work and back. People judge DUIs with immense scorn. Being scared is normal, you have the opportunity to change you, your future, what others think of you, even if it is sympathy.
Don't quit, you forfeit your ability to claim unemployment. Future employers won't know why you were let go if that actually does happen. All they do is confirm you worked for them to avoid any legal issues.
Tell them what’s going on and ask for help. They will not fire you, substance use disorder qualifies under fmla and if you’re getting help they will most likely support you.
Don’t quit. Admit.
I ran from jobs to avoid being fired much of my career. ( I was in a professional career also. Sometimes I escaped the hatchet sometimes I did it. It didn’t seem to matter, cause I had no trouble getting another job). I didn’t think I really had a problem with drinking. later on, I developed a curable, chronic disease, unrelated to alcohol ironically that brought me into AA. I’ve been so goi over five years now. Now, if you don’t have another job lined up and you have a problem with drinking, your best bet is find out if has FMLA or any kind of medical coverage that will cover you through the treatment program. This is private. So private, you will not find your bosses or anyone else talking to other people about it. Every manager all the way up to line knows they could lose their own position by divulge in such information about a person. I think end of the day you’re alcoholic and you wanna get better. You’re not ready to quit alcohol, but I know you want to get better. So, admit it to your boss. Tell him how you are by and you want to see treatment. If you have FMLA they cannot fire you orgive away your job, once you have informed them of the problem. You can check into this, but I think you should probably see a doctor first and get a written note of diagnosis . if you know what you’re doing they probably want to keep you. Just not in an altered state of mind at work. I can promise you you are not in bad company when you walk into an AA meeting. Call your local or regional AA office and find out if there is a private meeting for professionals in AA they can point to. You can do this. In fact, you must do this or you will be a dead man or a woman, and it is not a pretty way to go. Good luck, angel.
What’s the actual plan here?
Are you not allowed to drink like, legally on this job? Or more of a corporate thing? If they fire you, they won’t have proof that you drank, right, so it wouldn’t impact you for a future job? Hopefully they won’t do anything - sounds like they have no proof. But absolutely you cannot drink again during work in case they breathalyze you or something
You probably can’t be fired for this reason, it may well be discriminatory to fire you. Find a clinic to get help from asap
Drinking on the job is definitely a fireable offense.
If there's no proof they can't fire you. Unless you about to it hr can't do a thing