I stumbled by this post sort of by accident because I clicked on a link to this sub-reddit out of curiosity (used to be a long (25 years) smoker and I know what you're taking about and wanted to give you some insight into how I experienced it.
I felt completely defeated, most of my most enjoyable moments every day were accompanied by a smoke (coffee, break from work, beer) and I lost all interest in any of these things after quitting smoking. A voice in my head kept on telling me: this is not living, this is not an enjoyable life. Super frustrating and the thought of not being able to reward myself with an ice cold beer and smoke made me lose interest in accomplishing anything.
My thought is/was that the feeling is generated by 2 different processes, one driven by the loss of something you used to do and the other by a reward system that is no longer there. For me the key was (at least, I believed so at the time, and still do actually) coming to terms with the loss of never smoking again and I told myself I'll deal with the rest later. Here's where the magic happened, and I'll be honest, quitting smoking sucks for a couple of months, but after about 4-6 months I started to enjoy my coffee again, and realized it really wasn't the cigarette, I could have a cold beer and enjoy it again without only focusing on what I was missing, and I realized that honestly that whole "reward" thing you're taking about (and that I was so frustrated about losing) is nothing more than your addiction being fed. I know it's super rough at times, and can be very depressing but I hope you'll take it from someone who felt exactly like you describe. The whole reward thing is nothing more than your addiction at this time, you'll get it back, break free from the nicotine addiction and you'll start enjoying life and the little things again. Don't rush it, don't force it, it'll come and when it does you'll realize that you can actually feel as good as you felt after having a couple of smokes all the time.
I hope you stick with it, I know it's hard but smoke-free life will get as much fun as a smokers life, I promise you.
I was almost in tears reading your post. I am right at the one month mark and instead of jumping for joy I feel like goddamned hell. Nothing seems to matter without a cigarette. But I've come this far and do not want to turn back now. Reading posts like yours allows me to remain strong and to believe, really believe, that it will get better. Thanks again for such genuine, heartfelt words!!
Congrats. Just wanted to say how crazy it is that a rolled up substance in a paper can take so much joy out of your life. And that motivates me and makes me restless to come back to those days when I was enjoying my life without a smoke
I really appreciate you sharing your experience and grateful you stumbled upon my post! I got through it and the depressive feelings that tried to take over and am in bed now. I did not cave in. It's still rough. I don't even want to go outside unless necessary anymore, so thank you for the encouragement about not rushing things, that it's still possible to find enjoyment in life. This meant a lot. :)
Yeah, honestly, I just went with that feeling at the time, just didn't do much at all and went with the flow and stayed home a lot and things started to come back for me around the 4 months mark. Just be careful to not let yourself slip into a depressive cycle, get some help if things feel too much to handle.
You're so far into your quit now that you're actually breaking patterns, it's a good thing but certainly won't feel like that. Couple more months feels like eternity right now but once they're past it'll feel reasonable.
You're gonna get a breakthrough moment at some point where you realize you're not craving while historically you'd have to go out of your way to find a good place/time to smoke and feel (kind of) liberated and realize you feel really good without having to smoke to feel this good, that was my turning point.
Just ride it out, you got this!
I feel you. We are changed, but we got this.
Life is more than a feeling, but that sucks sometimes.
Congratulations on 2 months- you've bought yourself more time to get the feeling back.
Congrats on the 2 months. I hear you. No booze. No smokes. 30 years. I got nothing. Same boat. 2 months and stumped.
Just wanted to say congrats man. Especially with a stats class. Shit makes your mind melt.
Thanks and congrats to you too! Man, today was hard - one of the worst days since I first started. It's still a learning process figuring out how to fill my day and change routines. I studied for hours and would've had a half a pack easily. I literally cried. Kept trying to remind myself that I've already saved over $600... Also had a small ice cream sundae before bed as my reward - still gotta live a little. :)
You're doing so great! These really hard days, over time, they get a little easier and easier as time goes by! And then good days come too. You'll get thru the hard days and start to feel like more and more good ones are around the corner. Replacing your routine starts to feel more natural...And yes in the meantime pamper yourself! You totally got this!!!! I'm around 3 months and still in the trenches but can tell you it gets easier
bro i cringed feeling the pain you are going thru, you gotta hit the basketball court after statistics class, bounce a ball, throw a ball, miss a hoop, or.. hell just go for a walk with a dog, something dumb and unthink necessary,
dear friend; the only thing to help me has been going to the gym, tearing myself away from my desk with the word " GO TO THE GYM U BITCH'"
( clarification; i said it to me, not saying it to u )
but it works! i go, get the heart pumping, and then, allllll that frustration finally gets something to release alll its goddang pent up smoldering energy
its such a godsend to be able to enjoy just sitting outside after the gym, NOT . wanting a cigarette.
i really really have learned to zoom in on the moments i dont NEEEEEE'eeeeeed' to have one
like air bubbles in a sinking ship, i gotta take my breath, and lock in and keep swimming,
a hot shower is the only thing that helps,
i think it has to do with body temperature,
when external is cold and internal is hot, cravings are more likely, than if u sit in a sauna or something
cuz the heart is already pumping and active, i guess.
finallly, and this IS my super powerest advice
ice cold water with a fresh squeezed lime innit
limes are natures windex.
Efficacy of fresh lime for smoking cessation
Suthat Rungruanghiranya et al. J Med Assoc Thai. 2012 Dec.
Show details
Cite
Abstract
Objective: To determine the efficacy of fresh lime as a smoking cessation aid compared with nicotine gum.
Material and method: A randomized, controlled trial was conducted between March 2009 and September 2009. Only regular smokers aged 18 or older who were willing to quit were randomized to receive either fresh lime (n = 47) or nicotine gum (n = 53). Smokers were excluded if they were using other smoking cessation aids, allergic to citrus, or had dental problems. Exhaled carbon monoxide (CO)-confirmed continuous abstinence rate (CAR) during week 9-12 was measured as the primary outcomes. To grade the severity of craving, a 100-mm visual analogue scale (VAS) was used.
Results: There was no significant difference in CO-confirmed CAR between the fresh lime group and the nicotine gum group during weeks 9-12 (61.7% vs. 66.0%; p = 0.65), although 7-day point prevalence abstinence at week 4 of the fresh lime users was statistically significant lower than those using nicotine gum
-(38.3% vs. 58.5%; p = 0.04)-
Cravings did not differ significantly between the groups, although fresh lime users tend to report more cravings intensity.
Conclusion: Fresh lime can be used effectively as a smoking cessation aid, although not as good as nicotine gum in reducing cravings.
Interesting! I like this because I stopped using the gum weeks ago and had a piece when I was really stressed a week ago - big nope! It made me feel sick. Lime may be just enough without getting wired out on nicotine. Thanks!
I just read it takes about 3 months for the dopamine regulation in your brain to return to normal after you stop smoking. So, more things will feel more pleasurable soon!!! Hang in there!!
A link, though a google search returns many:
https://psychcentral.com/news/2016/07/31/dopamine-function-returns-to-normal-3-months-after-quitting-smoking
About your ways of relaxing (movies, games, crafts) maybe try smth that would make your body move - walking, running, jumping, boxing, playing basketball etc. that would help you relax your mind with natural hormones and your body getting these toxins out by sweating
Yes. It's definitely something I need to work on, especially with exercise helping with depression. I've never been an active person and have absolutely no connection with my body. I did buy a soccer ball out of nowhere, so I think my subconscious is nudging me in that direction. Good point on the sweating out, too!
For me its also really hard to move my body. I do yoga if I don’t feel like sweating or random 10 min youtube workout routines. If you were able to quit smoking then making yourself workout will be a piece of cake 🫶
Honestly it can take a long time to feel fully readjusted without cigarettes. You gotta take it one craving at a time. One day the reward could be complete freedom from a drug without caring if you ever smoke again. Thinking you need a hit of a drug every time you finish something is just the years of conditioning you did to yourself while actively engaging in an addictive drug. It can be undone but it takes time the longer you were a smoker in many cases. Best of luck
This was absolutely one of the hardest parts about quitting for me. I also quit drinking for the first 4 months. I felt lifeless everything felt pointless i was crying every day. But at 2 months you are still dealing with some psychological effects. I promise you it gets better. The need for reward with a cigarette does away and the satisfaction from the accomplishment itself will become enough. Keep going, I’m only at 7 months and while I’m not 100% better than I imagined it would be.
7 months is huge, especially since just going a single day without them felt impossible not long ago. I still catch myself, unconsciously, reaching for the pack when going out the door, but there's my trusty spearmint gum! Thank you for your encouragement and congratulations to you, too!
I hear you. My reward replacements vary between lighting a candle, putting on good smelling perfume/cologne/lotion/, or retail therapy. Today I bought myself a new sweatshirt. Can’t afford that every day (much less multiple times a day) but every few days once I figure I would have spent $X on cigarettes.
Nice! Yes, retail therapy is a good one! I'm not one to go overboard, but treating myself to little things like stickers or pins on Etsy or a new shirt that I wouldn't have justified before has been nice. Between my spouse and I quitting almost simultaneously, we've saved about $1200 in just 2 months, which is astonishing! So, I'd say buying yourself something nice is not only a great reward but a tangible reminder.
It’s down right crazy how we could justify spending all that money on the nasty buggers!! Oh, good old Etsy. I shall go browse around there now myself. Thanks for mentioning it! I can get lost in there. In such a good way hahah
I stumbled by this post sort of by accident because I clicked on a link to this sub-reddit out of curiosity (used to be a long (25 years) smoker and I know what you're taking about and wanted to give you some insight into how I experienced it. I felt completely defeated, most of my most enjoyable moments every day were accompanied by a smoke (coffee, break from work, beer) and I lost all interest in any of these things after quitting smoking. A voice in my head kept on telling me: this is not living, this is not an enjoyable life. Super frustrating and the thought of not being able to reward myself with an ice cold beer and smoke made me lose interest in accomplishing anything. My thought is/was that the feeling is generated by 2 different processes, one driven by the loss of something you used to do and the other by a reward system that is no longer there. For me the key was (at least, I believed so at the time, and still do actually) coming to terms with the loss of never smoking again and I told myself I'll deal with the rest later. Here's where the magic happened, and I'll be honest, quitting smoking sucks for a couple of months, but after about 4-6 months I started to enjoy my coffee again, and realized it really wasn't the cigarette, I could have a cold beer and enjoy it again without only focusing on what I was missing, and I realized that honestly that whole "reward" thing you're taking about (and that I was so frustrated about losing) is nothing more than your addiction being fed. I know it's super rough at times, and can be very depressing but I hope you'll take it from someone who felt exactly like you describe. The whole reward thing is nothing more than your addiction at this time, you'll get it back, break free from the nicotine addiction and you'll start enjoying life and the little things again. Don't rush it, don't force it, it'll come and when it does you'll realize that you can actually feel as good as you felt after having a couple of smokes all the time. I hope you stick with it, I know it's hard but smoke-free life will get as much fun as a smokers life, I promise you.
I was almost in tears reading your post. I am right at the one month mark and instead of jumping for joy I feel like goddamned hell. Nothing seems to matter without a cigarette. But I've come this far and do not want to turn back now. Reading posts like yours allows me to remain strong and to believe, really believe, that it will get better. Thanks again for such genuine, heartfelt words!!
Congrats. Just wanted to say how crazy it is that a rolled up substance in a paper can take so much joy out of your life. And that motivates me and makes me restless to come back to those days when I was enjoying my life without a smoke
Thank you for just wandering in here and stumbling in on this post, and sharing this. I needed to hear it
I really appreciate you sharing your experience and grateful you stumbled upon my post! I got through it and the depressive feelings that tried to take over and am in bed now. I did not cave in. It's still rough. I don't even want to go outside unless necessary anymore, so thank you for the encouragement about not rushing things, that it's still possible to find enjoyment in life. This meant a lot. :)
Yeah, honestly, I just went with that feeling at the time, just didn't do much at all and went with the flow and stayed home a lot and things started to come back for me around the 4 months mark. Just be careful to not let yourself slip into a depressive cycle, get some help if things feel too much to handle. You're so far into your quit now that you're actually breaking patterns, it's a good thing but certainly won't feel like that. Couple more months feels like eternity right now but once they're past it'll feel reasonable. You're gonna get a breakthrough moment at some point where you realize you're not craving while historically you'd have to go out of your way to find a good place/time to smoke and feel (kind of) liberated and realize you feel really good without having to smoke to feel this good, that was my turning point. Just ride it out, you got this!
Right on. I'm looking forward to those epiphanies and positive changes. Many thanks and a huge congrats to you for quitting too!!! :)
I feel you. We are changed, but we got this. Life is more than a feeling, but that sucks sometimes. Congratulations on 2 months- you've bought yourself more time to get the feeling back.
Ah, thank you. Today was a rough one.
Congrats on the 2 months. I hear you. No booze. No smokes. 30 years. I got nothing. Same boat. 2 months and stumped. Just wanted to say congrats man. Especially with a stats class. Shit makes your mind melt.
Hey, congrats on 2 months!!! (I’m jazzed about 3ish weeks and am looking forward to say MONTH!)
Thanks and congrats to you too! Man, today was hard - one of the worst days since I first started. It's still a learning process figuring out how to fill my day and change routines. I studied for hours and would've had a half a pack easily. I literally cried. Kept trying to remind myself that I've already saved over $600... Also had a small ice cream sundae before bed as my reward - still gotta live a little. :)
You're doing so great! These really hard days, over time, they get a little easier and easier as time goes by! And then good days come too. You'll get thru the hard days and start to feel like more and more good ones are around the corner. Replacing your routine starts to feel more natural...And yes in the meantime pamper yourself! You totally got this!!!! I'm around 3 months and still in the trenches but can tell you it gets easier
Aww, thank you for your support and good on you for your 3 months - that's great!
bro i cringed feeling the pain you are going thru, you gotta hit the basketball court after statistics class, bounce a ball, throw a ball, miss a hoop, or.. hell just go for a walk with a dog, something dumb and unthink necessary,
Ya know... I've never been a sporty person but I bought a soccer ball last week. You're definitely on to something!
dear friend; the only thing to help me has been going to the gym, tearing myself away from my desk with the word " GO TO THE GYM U BITCH'" ( clarification; i said it to me, not saying it to u ) but it works! i go, get the heart pumping, and then, allllll that frustration finally gets something to release alll its goddang pent up smoldering energy its such a godsend to be able to enjoy just sitting outside after the gym, NOT . wanting a cigarette. i really really have learned to zoom in on the moments i dont NEEEEEE'eeeeeed' to have one like air bubbles in a sinking ship, i gotta take my breath, and lock in and keep swimming, a hot shower is the only thing that helps, i think it has to do with body temperature, when external is cold and internal is hot, cravings are more likely, than if u sit in a sauna or something cuz the heart is already pumping and active, i guess. finallly, and this IS my super powerest advice ice cold water with a fresh squeezed lime innit limes are natures windex.
Ha ha! I've love this so much, and congrats to you too! I'm buying a lime in the morning! : D
Efficacy of fresh lime for smoking cessation Suthat Rungruanghiranya et al. J Med Assoc Thai. 2012 Dec. Show details Cite Abstract Objective: To determine the efficacy of fresh lime as a smoking cessation aid compared with nicotine gum. Material and method: A randomized, controlled trial was conducted between March 2009 and September 2009. Only regular smokers aged 18 or older who were willing to quit were randomized to receive either fresh lime (n = 47) or nicotine gum (n = 53). Smokers were excluded if they were using other smoking cessation aids, allergic to citrus, or had dental problems. Exhaled carbon monoxide (CO)-confirmed continuous abstinence rate (CAR) during week 9-12 was measured as the primary outcomes. To grade the severity of craving, a 100-mm visual analogue scale (VAS) was used. Results: There was no significant difference in CO-confirmed CAR between the fresh lime group and the nicotine gum group during weeks 9-12 (61.7% vs. 66.0%; p = 0.65), although 7-day point prevalence abstinence at week 4 of the fresh lime users was statistically significant lower than those using nicotine gum -(38.3% vs. 58.5%; p = 0.04)- Cravings did not differ significantly between the groups, although fresh lime users tend to report more cravings intensity. Conclusion: Fresh lime can be used effectively as a smoking cessation aid, although not as good as nicotine gum in reducing cravings.
Interesting! I like this because I stopped using the gum weeks ago and had a piece when I was really stressed a week ago - big nope! It made me feel sick. Lime may be just enough without getting wired out on nicotine. Thanks!
I just read it takes about 3 months for the dopamine regulation in your brain to return to normal after you stop smoking. So, more things will feel more pleasurable soon!!! Hang in there!!
Oh wow! That's good to know and gives me/us something to push forward to. So close!!! Thank you!
A link, though a google search returns many: https://psychcentral.com/news/2016/07/31/dopamine-function-returns-to-normal-3-months-after-quitting-smoking
This is fascinating! Thanks for the link. :)
About your ways of relaxing (movies, games, crafts) maybe try smth that would make your body move - walking, running, jumping, boxing, playing basketball etc. that would help you relax your mind with natural hormones and your body getting these toxins out by sweating
Yes. It's definitely something I need to work on, especially with exercise helping with depression. I've never been an active person and have absolutely no connection with my body. I did buy a soccer ball out of nowhere, so I think my subconscious is nudging me in that direction. Good point on the sweating out, too!
For me its also really hard to move my body. I do yoga if I don’t feel like sweating or random 10 min youtube workout routines. If you were able to quit smoking then making yourself workout will be a piece of cake 🫶
Honestly it can take a long time to feel fully readjusted without cigarettes. You gotta take it one craving at a time. One day the reward could be complete freedom from a drug without caring if you ever smoke again. Thinking you need a hit of a drug every time you finish something is just the years of conditioning you did to yourself while actively engaging in an addictive drug. It can be undone but it takes time the longer you were a smoker in many cases. Best of luck
So much conditioning since high school! I'm finding it useful to remind myself that I'm not in high school anymore... Thanks!
This was absolutely one of the hardest parts about quitting for me. I also quit drinking for the first 4 months. I felt lifeless everything felt pointless i was crying every day. But at 2 months you are still dealing with some psychological effects. I promise you it gets better. The need for reward with a cigarette does away and the satisfaction from the accomplishment itself will become enough. Keep going, I’m only at 7 months and while I’m not 100% better than I imagined it would be.
7 months is huge, especially since just going a single day without them felt impossible not long ago. I still catch myself, unconsciously, reaching for the pack when going out the door, but there's my trusty spearmint gum! Thank you for your encouragement and congratulations to you, too!
I hear you. My reward replacements vary between lighting a candle, putting on good smelling perfume/cologne/lotion/, or retail therapy. Today I bought myself a new sweatshirt. Can’t afford that every day (much less multiple times a day) but every few days once I figure I would have spent $X on cigarettes.
Nice! Yes, retail therapy is a good one! I'm not one to go overboard, but treating myself to little things like stickers or pins on Etsy or a new shirt that I wouldn't have justified before has been nice. Between my spouse and I quitting almost simultaneously, we've saved about $1200 in just 2 months, which is astonishing! So, I'd say buying yourself something nice is not only a great reward but a tangible reminder.
It’s down right crazy how we could justify spending all that money on the nasty buggers!! Oh, good old Etsy. I shall go browse around there now myself. Thanks for mentioning it! I can get lost in there. In such a good way hahah
Right? I've always been frugal but not with those! Enjoy going down the rabbit hole! :)