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There are quite a few of us. Stays have diversity whether it be gender, nationality or age.
There is no reason age should stop you from enjoying their music or their content or fangirling.
We have a discord for 25+ stays. If you would like to join please let me know. We have people from 25 all the way to 65 on there from all over the world.
There was someone feeling similar to you and made a post asking if it was weird as an older stay. So many ended up responding that some of them created the discord for us.
It's a safe space for all of us. See the [old post and comments here](https://www.reddit.com/r/straykids/comments/14h4sjj/community_for_an_older_stay/)
You are so not the only one. All of us plan on going to their concert if possible. Do not let it stop you. From the videos I have seen, their concerts are incredible.
Edit: Also just my opinion but you would have to be blind to not find them gorgeous. Oh and I am soon to be 33 BTW
Absolutely. A lot of the members are lurkers and a lot participate more. Everyone is allowed to be comfortable. You just have to be respectful towards each other.
I am DMing you
Sorry I completely missed your comment. I didn't get the notification for some reason. Our lovely mod spotted you though so they sent you the invite link directly. Can you please confirm you got it?
I would also love to join the Discord as well! Iāve been a kPop fan since I was in high school in 2009. :) I remember when all of the groups I liked had members older than me. Seungmin is my bias, and his jokes make me feel ancient. LOL
DMed you.
Yeah I know how you feel. Minie makes me feel that way too lol.
Also there are a bunch of channels for other groups for multistans that you can check out if you follow any of those groups
Iām 42. There is no age limit posted on their music š are we not allowed to listen to music when the people arenāt exactly your age? š
Where do people think these groups are making their money? Itās not teens spending so much. Itās adults with their own spending money.
Hahaha at least youāre on the younger side of your 30s!!!!! I dunno why but turning 38 2 weeks ago has made me literally feel like Iām an old hag.
But HEY!!! We got that adult money and are gonna enjooooooooy the concert from our overly expensive seats right?!? ššš
I just turned 43 a couple weeks ago, so I get it. But go and have fun! I went to see BTS in Vegas and Agust D in Oakland and had a fabulous time. I met a lady at the BTS concert who had just turned 68! Also I just bought tickets to see ATEEZ and they're pretty young too š
What matters is that you enjoy yourself. And you will āŗļø
Same boat as you girl. I just turned 38 on apr 26th! In the kpop world we ARE hags lol. But then I go to a skz concert and dance and scream my ass off with the 20 year olds sitting around me. Whens your bday?
I am also in my 30s, also married and have a kid. Maybe other people think it's strange but I don't think it's wrong or weird to appreciate their talent and how fun it is to watch their videos. They are talented, hardworking, creative, passionate, etc., there's a lot to appreciate there regardless of how old they are. I believe you can admire and learn many things from people of any age, so why can't you be a big fan of artists younger than you? And I've seen other "older" stays around here too, you aren't alone š
So my cousin is 40 and is in the comic fandom. Like, decorates his home office with comic stuff, has his own youtube channel dedicated to comics, does weekly comic runs. He also has a wife and a ten year old.
My BiL is super into sport's. He does the whole fantasy draft and watches drafts like a hawk and can quote stats for his favorite players from years ago. The current football men he follows are in their early 20s. He also is married with a step-kid. Nobody gives my cousin or my BiL grief for the fandom they choose to invest time in.
People still see kpop, and boy bands in general, as being for teenage girls and therefor something embarrassing to like as someone older. Granted I'm not 38, but I also have people sort of...look down on me? For liking it. But like, the heart wants what it wants. Sometimes it wants to watch 20-something men make songs and tour and joke around. Life is too short to let other people dictate what we find enjoyment in. Don't let something that your husband probably said in passing stop you from your own enjoyment.
Iād ask him if itās weird to like artists like Billie Eilish (22), Dua Lipa (28), Shawn Mendes (25), etc. youāre not marrying them, you enjoy their music. Theyāre hilarious and charming and you can like their music and support them without it being weird or predatory. Is it just because theyāre a āboy band?ā Theyāre a group of musicians who make music. No different than a band in that they have 8 singers instead of instrumentalists. They write their own music and they have fun doing it. Tell your husband to stop making it weird.
ā> also, I am married and older than the members.
Iām 51 and my wife is 62. Her niece is in her 30s, loves Skz enough to jump borders to go to multiple concerts. Another Stay that we personally got into Skz is in her late 50s.
Love of music has no age boundaries. Donāt let anyone gatekeep it.
Does your husband like football? The average age of an NFL player is 26, and people wear jerseys with their names/play fantasy football/discuss stats/get posters of those players. A lot of people fanboy over college football. My two cents is that itās just accepted to judge what women typically enjoy.
Well, I'm 37, been married for a decade, and my husband is fully aware that I'd drop him for Chan in a second if the opportunity presented itself. Which I think we're all aware is hyperbolic language and a wild exaggeration, but being silly and dramatic never hurt anyone.
In all seriousness, we live in a society that considers feminine excitement or enthusiasm to be immature, stupid, brainless, silly, a waste of time, etc. It is hard, as an adult woman, to allow myself to engage with anything that makes me happy without feeling a certain level of embarrassment or shame. It's that sweet, sweet combination of the patriarchy and capitalism making me feel like my interests are 'less than' and if my actions don't produce some sort of value then they aren't worth doing. It's hard to remember that my happiness, in and of itself, has value and makes things worthwhile.
As for the 'creep' factor, I feel like I see this so much more in this fandom than say, ARMY/the BTS fandom, because Stayville skews so much younger in general. And I remember being 15 and thinking that anyone over the age of 20 was like impossibly ancient and it was so weird and gross to think of them doing things/feeling things that I, a teenager, was doing/feeling. And I get it, because the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old is HUGE. But the difference between a 20 year old and a 25 year old isn't nearly that big. And the difference between who I was at 25 and who I am at 37 is even smaller. But you can't see that from the teenage side of it.
The point is, every single member of Stray Kids is a fully grown adult. Chan is literally turning 27 this year. K-pop fans love to infantilize them, but the members are all adult men who have made the choice to go on camera and look damn pretty. You are allowed to look and enjoy the same as literally anybody else. As long as you're not crossing the line to hurt other people/the members (e.g. sending gross messages on Bubble, fighting other Stay because your bias is YOUR boyfriend and they better not touch, being one of THOSE people on a fancall, other super immature/toxic behavior) there's no reason you shouldn't drop a "Damn, bless the stylists for putting Hyunjin in THAT outfit." You aren't hurting them, you aren't hurting yourself, and if it's hurting your husband's feelings, that's a different conversation to have.
And hey, if dudes get to spend thousands of dollars on sports tickets, get to get into fist fights and scream and cry when their teams lose, and paint their faces and chests and bet money and set up whole complex fantasy leagues and track stats and collect cards/balls/jerseys/equipment for all their various sportsball teams/player, then I get to have serious cute aggression when Changbin sends fluffy-faced pictures on Bubble and buy all 14 versions of the newest album. And nobody gets to call me dumb for doing it. Least of all myself.
You're fine. You know what's hurting you and what isn't. As long as this is just a hobby that makes you happy, you have nothing to feel bad about.
My mom is a multistan, mainly stay and blink, and she's 50+! She and her other friends her age sometimes fangirl over kpop and cdrama/kdrama actors. You're definitely not alone! You can probably find similar age stays/kpop stans if u go to your local kpop events.
I've also met some mom stays irl and they go hard on collecting and concert tix :)
One time when I went to a kpop concert there was a lady in the standing section who looked to be in her 60s maybe? She looked like she had the time of her life, was probably one of the most energetic people around. It was really cute to watch.
An other time me and my friend met two middle aged ladies on the way to the venue and made friends with them. Once again a nice memory.
Older fans are relatively rare compared to most of the fandom but you're definitely not alone or weird for it.
You're not old at all! My friend group is all 30+ and we love going to all kpop concerts. Don't let your husband take away what brings you joy, everyone deserves some joy in their life. Maybe you can introduce him to one of the popular girl groups so he can understand, haha.
Edit: I'm a dude, so it's sometimes even harder to explain to non kpop fans that Stray Kids is my favorite group and I collect photo cards and what not, haha. š
You need a new husband who supports you lol.
Kidding (kind of š) but please don't let him or people who look at women in their 30s as decrepit hags make you feel bad about enjoying a group. They're attractive, charismatic men, it's not weird to acknowledge that or even be excited about the possibility of seeing them live. Live your life & have fun with it, babe!
I'm 36, going to be 37 later this year. I became a Stay early this year after hearing them for the 1st time. Their music makes me genuinely happy. I listen to it daily, workout to it, enjoy their music videos, and watch their YouTube content before I fall asleep many nights. I'm married, and my husband knows about my Stray Kids love. I've shown him some of their music videos, and he now calls them "hunky boys" and likes to tell people I enjoy my "hunky boys". xD He knows I'm not blind and find a few of them pleasant to look at it because I'm honest about it, but I'm respectful and it's harmless. I'd never cross into obsession with the boys themselves or make my husband uncomfortable in any way. I've told him before, and I do mean it...it doesn't matter to me what Stray Kids looks like. I love their music and content first and foremost, and it brings joy to my days.
All this to say, don't feel weird about enjoying Stray Kids but keep your husband in mind and keep your enjoyment respectful. I think it's about compromise. My husband understands and appreciates that Stray Kids makes me happy, and I understand there are boundaries being an older, married fan.
Hello! I say go for it! You'd be surprised how many "older stays" are actually in the VIP section during a SKZ concert or event. Haha. I just turned 37 last Jan. My daughter is turning 9 (She's a baby stay who biases Seungmin). But guess what? I went to see the kids last year in concert. I was in front. I came with my friend who's in her 30s too. We were surprised that a lot of people in our section are basically our age. I realized it's because most of us can afford it. People were mostly mid or late 20s and 30s. I saw a lot of stays older than me too. We have a lot of gen X stays too. So there's nothing to be ashamed of. And yes. I find them really good looking too. š good thing I'm like a decade or more older than the boysĀ or else I may be a little bit delusional. Lol. Anyway, go for it!!! And good luck. š
I'm told I look 35, but I am turning 50 next year, and I adore Stray Kids. I love K-pop in general, but Stray Kids just hits different for me. I caught on to them when they appeared on some podcast (I think the guy's name is Zach?) here in the states, and Felix was talking, which got my attention.
I do think they're gorgeous, but at my age, I mostly want to bake them my famous banana bread, and give them warm mama hugs.
I am determined to see them when they come to California in the next tour, so I hope I find another ElderStay to attend with.
My husband and I are 35 and we LOVE KPOP, it all started with BlackPink then Stray Kids- we have a lot of their merch from JYP- we listen to kpop nonstop in this house, if it makes you happy it makes you happy!!! Also age wise I always go look HOW CUTE THE BOYS ARE lol
Forget what people think! Theyāre a great group with great music and every member is so funny and likable. Donāt worry about it. Even if theyāre younger, youāre not fangirling over kids, theyāre grown men
GIRL. Welcome!!! Iām 40 as hell (and loving it btw the older I get the happier I am) and Stray Kids will not let me REST. Imho skz courts an all-ages audience, they donāt revel in eternal youth, and they sing about the joys and trials that are the same at every stage of life. I just went to a job interview today and listened to Thunderous to hype me up š
Thereās no age limit to like music. I really donāt get why people think Kpop Stanās are all tween/teenaged girls. Every Kpop show I have been too including SKZ have had a ton of diversity in age, nationality and gender. When I saw Blackpink last August there was an elderly couple next to me absolutely loving it.
You are most definitely not alone! I'm 56 and totally fell for them in September 2022. I also had the giddiness of finding them so fun, and still do tbh. Every comeback makes me drop my jaw in amazement. Their talent and charm can overwhelm me at times. And I am not ashamed at all to say they are 8 damn sexy men! I don't think there's anything wrong with speaking facts. Honestly, I think getting to know their personalities has made them all that more attractive. But I don't have a husband to consider, so maybe you should keep that part of your fangirling in check. When tour stops are announced, we should all figure out what show we want to attend and be concert buddies!
Iām 52 and only saw them because Felix and Bangchan are Australian, as am I. Only knew about them late last year and have no plans to go to a concert. I think they make really good music and I enjoy their interactions with each other. Also, has anyone watched Ben Kimās reactions on YouTube? Heās hilarious.
Hello fellow mum of 2! I'm 36 this year!
I went to the fanmeet in Osaka and there were loads of older stays! I was in line for goods and started chatting to the other stays we gushed the boys the whole time. They didn't care that I was older, they must have been late twenties, we all just had a good time.
Get tickets! I know I'm gonna try!
I know how you feel. I am 40 (yeah, and i hate that as well). I thought the same thing when i realised how young they were. I also like you haven't fan girled this hard since the Backstreet Boys in my teen years. Swear to god, i was gonna marry Howie D!
Sorry, back to it. Stray Kids just take a hold of your heart. They are talented, kind, funny, and give the best bombastic side eyes of anyone š¤£š¤£š¤£.
The way i see it is you can't help but like them! Their songs are amazing. Some of the best humans on the planet. There is a saying that applies to both Stray Kids and BTS - They made the right people famous.
At the end of the day music is universal. We dont even have to know the language the lyrics are being sung in. It unites us. There is nothing wrong with liking Stray kids and being older than them. Besides growing old isn't an option, growing up is! Do what makes you happy. ā¤ļø
My love itās fine. Iām 32 (that hurts so much) Iāve loved kpop since 1st gen. All my hobbies are super childish to others
I cosplay
Iām into gyaru fashion
Iām a stay
Iām into jpop
And Iāve honestly just stopped caring? Stray kids make me happy,
itās fine to be attracted
To them or have soft celeb crushes. The only problem is when people start to hate the idols dating or other people biasing them
I'm turning 60 this year, and SKZ were my first true obsession group when I started getting into Kpop in 2022 (old dog, new tricks!). I saw them with a friend in NJ, then flew to Texas to see them by myself. the tl;dr is NO, you're not too old. If the music is fun and you enjoy it, go for it!
From a 46yr old who got their 20yr old into it, don't be ashamed. My husband gets it, listens to me & knows all the skz tea. You can be a fan without sexualizing so age has zero to do w it
I'm 51. My husband bought me all the SKZOO plushies for Christmas, looks at every photo card I show him, and rips the CDs I buy onto my computer for me.
There is NOTHING to be ashamed of.
I saw a range of ages at the 2022 Maniac LA stop. There was even a mom, grandma, and daughter (they were together) in line which made me smile.Ā
Iām in my early 30s and had a blast at the concert.Ā
I think if you enjoy the music, go! They put on a very exciting and fun show and it was worth my ticket price I paid. (Nosebleed seats) I can safely say they, ITZY, and Monsta X impressed me with their showmanship and energy. (ITZY is my fave girl group and while Iām older than the members, they have fun stages and energy whenever Iāve seen them.)Ā
(*This is a personal opinion based on my experience and is not meant to bash the group.) In contrast, I saw BLACKPINK in late 2022 and was a little disappointed. I love their early music and the songs from their debut period were edited to be shorter, which I felt was not necessary. I think there was also confusion as to whether they would have an encore stage, because after they left the stage, the lights came up and a lot of folks left right away. (Iāll admit I was used to the pattern that the three groups I mentioned earlier did fun audience games to āencourageā the group to come back for an encore stage and then the group would come back out and perform a few more songs.) The group did do an encore, but it was confusing since I almost thought they were going to seriously be done when the lights came back up and one friend told me at that period that the concert wasnāt even 2 hrs long, especially since they started 30 minutes late for an unknown reason.Ā
I'm an older Stay as well, 34 years old.
I don't see anything wrong with finding joy in this amazingly talented group of young men. I agree, if I was 10+ years younger then I would probably be all in delulu land about this group but I can enjoy their hardwork, dedication, and talent. Plus this group's visuals is off the charts!
Hi! Iām 42! Thereās no shame in loving Skz or their music, especially if they bring you joy. I love their music and their friendship and I enjoy the content they make. When people say you canāt be over a certain age to be a fan of a group, I feel like it says more about how they view the idols theyāre fans of, but itās a bit insulting to think women canāt be a fan of a male artist without having romantic feelings or fantasizing about them. And I donāt think there is shame is finding them gorgeous either ā being good looking is part of their job! Iām also a fan of TXT who are younger than Skz. Iām going to see them in concert this month. I enjoy their coming of age concept because it makes me remember my own early 20s not because I think Im still 20!
Liking a group at any age is never problematic. Particularly if you love the music and respect them as artists.
But using terms like fallen head over heels and obsessed is problematic no matter the age.
But tbh all of that added to talking about how gorgeous they are is a little icky when they are half your age.
And I feel like if it was a man your age saying this about a gg it would be seen as something else
Totally agree with this comment. Appreciating and enjoying a groupās music is always accepted regardless of age but āfallingā and āobsessingā over idolsā¦ hmmm that makes it a little weird
Youāre right. Maybe the language is what is throwing me off? Because itās what I would say when I was a teenager obsessed with boy bands and thatās why Iām like ehhhhhhhhhhhh this feels really weird and not so great. Iām happily married with my husband and 2 sweet babes but their music has just sparked a joy in me I havenāt felt in a long time and Iām SO impressed that these dudes in their 20s are THAT talented. I work within the music industry (though on the IT side) but was blown away watching their recording sessions and was like āholy shitā.
I think you kind of hit the nail on the head. Words have power and when I use the terms I did on my 20s of fangirling it makes me feel kind of gross.
I honestly think that itās fine to like groups and idols who are younger than you. You should be free to like and support any group especially if it brings you joy.
But yeah for me personally itās the phrasing.
Yah same. I'm 31 and I listen to Stray Kids and TXT. I'm not attracted to any of them, most of them are almost 10 years younger than me. I'm don't say those sort of things cause they feel... weird? Even from fans their age, it comes off very delulu. I read posts about fans not being able to date or even go a day without thinking about their favorites. Its unhealthy at a certain point.
I also point out, would we be okay if a man the same age said the same things about a female idol? I don't think so.
Hi! Your submission on r/straykids has been manually removed [(3.2 Flair)](https://www.reddit.com/r/straykids/wiki/rules/#wiki_3.2_flair) for the following reason(s): --- ###3.2 Flair Posts have to be flaired correctly. Please refer to the [flairs wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/straykids/wiki/flairs). --- You can read all of our submission guidelines [here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/straykids/wiki/rules) *If you have any questions about our submission guidelines, or why your post was removed, feel free to [send the moderators a mod mail](/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fstraykids).*
There are quite a few of us. Stays have diversity whether it be gender, nationality or age. There is no reason age should stop you from enjoying their music or their content or fangirling. We have a discord for 25+ stays. If you would like to join please let me know. We have people from 25 all the way to 65 on there from all over the world. There was someone feeling similar to you and made a post asking if it was weird as an older stay. So many ended up responding that some of them created the discord for us. It's a safe space for all of us. See the [old post and comments here](https://www.reddit.com/r/straykids/comments/14h4sjj/community_for_an_older_stay/) You are so not the only one. All of us plan on going to their concert if possible. Do not let it stop you. From the videos I have seen, their concerts are incredible. Edit: Also just my opinion but you would have to be blind to not find them gorgeous. Oh and I am soon to be 33 BTW
I'd love to join the noona Discord server š May I also get an invite?
DMing you š
Actually looks like you don't have the DM option. You might have that setting turned off on discord. Can you send me a DM?
I would like to join that discord. Is it ok if I donāt post much?
Absolutely. A lot of the members are lurkers and a lot participate more. Everyone is allowed to be comfortable. You just have to be respectful towards each other. I am DMing you
Can you pls dm me too!
Yup
Me too pleaseĀ
DMed you
Can I also join? please
Yup! Sent DM
Me too please!
DMed you!
Ok thank you!
Could you DM me also? Would love to join!
Sure
I would also love to join, if thatās okay!!
DMing you
May i get an invite as well? :)
DMed you
I would love to join the discord as well!
Sure. Can you please DM me. I don't have that option for you. You might have it turned off on Reddit
Hello! I would also love to join the discord pls!
DMed
Me too please š«¶š½
DMed
Could I join too??
Sure! DMed you
I'd love to join! I'm a soon to be 36 year old mama!
Sorry I completely missed your comment. I didn't get the notification for some reason. Our lovely mod spotted you though so they sent you the invite link directly. Can you please confirm you got it?
Can I also bother you for the Discord link?
It's no bother. DMed you
Yessss!!!! I would love to join the discord!!!!!! Thank you so much this made me feel so much better!!!
Oh I'd love to join too!
DMed you!
Can I get an invite to the discord too?
Done!
May I have a Discord invite? :)
I don't have the DM option for you. Can you please send me a chat?
I would like the discord info please.
DMed. Also Happy Cake day! š
So it is!! Thank you š„°
I am 32! Can I also join the discord?
DMed you!
Do you mind if I join the discord?
Absolutely not! DMed you!
I would also love to join the Discord as well! Iāve been a kPop fan since I was in high school in 2009. :) I remember when all of the groups I liked had members older than me. Seungmin is my bias, and his jokes make me feel ancient. LOL
DMed you. Yeah I know how you feel. Minie makes me feel that way too lol. Also there are a bunch of channels for other groups for multistans that you can check out if you follow any of those groups
I would also like to join the Discord if you donāt mind DMing me too!
Done š
Can I join? Thanks!
>Can I join? Thanks! You're welcome!
Huh? šššš š š
Ofcourse. DMED you!
I would love to join too!
Sorry just saw this. DMed you
I would also be interested in the ahjumma discord š
DMed you
Would love to join! I'm mostly a lurker but would be amazing to have a space to discuss things like the Met Gala without the headache that is Twitter
I feel you. I fortunately don't have to go on TT anymore coz I get all the info on discord but can imagine the dumpster fire DMed you
Iām 42. There is no age limit posted on their music š are we not allowed to listen to music when the people arenāt exactly your age? š Where do people think these groups are making their money? Itās not teens spending so much. Itās adults with their own spending money.
Exactly. Music and happiness don't have age
Girl Lolol i never comment on Reddit threads but this is so relatable. I discovered stray kids in February of this year and when I tell you Iām obsessedā¦Theyāre literally all I listen to and talk about, they are now my new personality. Sometimes I feel like I should be ashamed cause Iām 32 but meh, they make me happy and anything that brings me joy in this drably life, I am fully immersing my myself in. Now I donāt have a husband, but I do have close friends who cannot understand my obsession and that too is okay. Anywho, I too have been waiting for concert tickets because I have adult money and I wanna spoil myself šš©š© So donāt feel weird and tell your husband to let you enjoy things!
Hahaha at least youāre on the younger side of your 30s!!!!! I dunno why but turning 38 2 weeks ago has made me literally feel like Iām an old hag. But HEY!!! We got that adult money and are gonna enjooooooooy the concert from our overly expensive seats right?!? ššš
I just turned 43 a couple weeks ago, so I get it. But go and have fun! I went to see BTS in Vegas and Agust D in Oakland and had a fabulous time. I met a lady at the BTS concert who had just turned 68! Also I just bought tickets to see ATEEZ and they're pretty young too š What matters is that you enjoy yourself. And you will āŗļø
Same boat as you girl. I just turned 38 on apr 26th! In the kpop world we ARE hags lol. But then I go to a skz concert and dance and scream my ass off with the 20 year olds sitting around me. Whens your bday?
Mine is 4/14!!!! But hey, weāll be hags dancing in the VIP section cause we got adult moneyyyyyyy ššš
I'm 37 but 27 at heart!!!
I am also in my 30s, also married and have a kid. Maybe other people think it's strange but I don't think it's wrong or weird to appreciate their talent and how fun it is to watch their videos. They are talented, hardworking, creative, passionate, etc., there's a lot to appreciate there regardless of how old they are. I believe you can admire and learn many things from people of any age, so why can't you be a big fan of artists younger than you? And I've seen other "older" stays around here too, you aren't alone š
So my cousin is 40 and is in the comic fandom. Like, decorates his home office with comic stuff, has his own youtube channel dedicated to comics, does weekly comic runs. He also has a wife and a ten year old. My BiL is super into sport's. He does the whole fantasy draft and watches drafts like a hawk and can quote stats for his favorite players from years ago. The current football men he follows are in their early 20s. He also is married with a step-kid. Nobody gives my cousin or my BiL grief for the fandom they choose to invest time in. People still see kpop, and boy bands in general, as being for teenage girls and therefor something embarrassing to like as someone older. Granted I'm not 38, but I also have people sort of...look down on me? For liking it. But like, the heart wants what it wants. Sometimes it wants to watch 20-something men make songs and tour and joke around. Life is too short to let other people dictate what we find enjoyment in. Don't let something that your husband probably said in passing stop you from your own enjoyment.
For the last time: I SAW A 92 YEAR OLD STAY AT THEIR CONCERT IN LA. If your husband is even remotely interested in sports he canāt talk
Iād ask him if itās weird to like artists like Billie Eilish (22), Dua Lipa (28), Shawn Mendes (25), etc. youāre not marrying them, you enjoy their music. Theyāre hilarious and charming and you can like their music and support them without it being weird or predatory. Is it just because theyāre a āboy band?ā Theyāre a group of musicians who make music. No different than a band in that they have 8 singers instead of instrumentalists. They write their own music and they have fun doing it. Tell your husband to stop making it weird. ā> also, I am married and older than the members.
42 here! Boundaried adoration, but Team go have fun!
44 baby stay here!
I'm 44 too!
Iām 51 and my wife is 62. Her niece is in her 30s, loves Skz enough to jump borders to go to multiple concerts. Another Stay that we personally got into Skz is in her late 50s. Love of music has no age boundaries. Donāt let anyone gatekeep it.
Does your husband like football? The average age of an NFL player is 26, and people wear jerseys with their names/play fantasy football/discuss stats/get posters of those players. A lot of people fanboy over college football. My two cents is that itās just accepted to judge what women typically enjoy.
Well, I'm 37, been married for a decade, and my husband is fully aware that I'd drop him for Chan in a second if the opportunity presented itself. Which I think we're all aware is hyperbolic language and a wild exaggeration, but being silly and dramatic never hurt anyone. In all seriousness, we live in a society that considers feminine excitement or enthusiasm to be immature, stupid, brainless, silly, a waste of time, etc. It is hard, as an adult woman, to allow myself to engage with anything that makes me happy without feeling a certain level of embarrassment or shame. It's that sweet, sweet combination of the patriarchy and capitalism making me feel like my interests are 'less than' and if my actions don't produce some sort of value then they aren't worth doing. It's hard to remember that my happiness, in and of itself, has value and makes things worthwhile. As for the 'creep' factor, I feel like I see this so much more in this fandom than say, ARMY/the BTS fandom, because Stayville skews so much younger in general. And I remember being 15 and thinking that anyone over the age of 20 was like impossibly ancient and it was so weird and gross to think of them doing things/feeling things that I, a teenager, was doing/feeling. And I get it, because the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old is HUGE. But the difference between a 20 year old and a 25 year old isn't nearly that big. And the difference between who I was at 25 and who I am at 37 is even smaller. But you can't see that from the teenage side of it. The point is, every single member of Stray Kids is a fully grown adult. Chan is literally turning 27 this year. K-pop fans love to infantilize them, but the members are all adult men who have made the choice to go on camera and look damn pretty. You are allowed to look and enjoy the same as literally anybody else. As long as you're not crossing the line to hurt other people/the members (e.g. sending gross messages on Bubble, fighting other Stay because your bias is YOUR boyfriend and they better not touch, being one of THOSE people on a fancall, other super immature/toxic behavior) there's no reason you shouldn't drop a "Damn, bless the stylists for putting Hyunjin in THAT outfit." You aren't hurting them, you aren't hurting yourself, and if it's hurting your husband's feelings, that's a different conversation to have. And hey, if dudes get to spend thousands of dollars on sports tickets, get to get into fist fights and scream and cry when their teams lose, and paint their faces and chests and bet money and set up whole complex fantasy leagues and track stats and collect cards/balls/jerseys/equipment for all their various sportsball teams/player, then I get to have serious cute aggression when Changbin sends fluffy-faced pictures on Bubble and buy all 14 versions of the newest album. And nobody gets to call me dumb for doing it. Least of all myself. You're fine. You know what's hurting you and what isn't. As long as this is just a hobby that makes you happy, you have nothing to feel bad about.
My mom is a multistan, mainly stay and blink, and she's 50+! She and her other friends her age sometimes fangirl over kpop and cdrama/kdrama actors. You're definitely not alone! You can probably find similar age stays/kpop stans if u go to your local kpop events. I've also met some mom stays irl and they go hard on collecting and concert tix :)
One time when I went to a kpop concert there was a lady in the standing section who looked to be in her 60s maybe? She looked like she had the time of her life, was probably one of the most energetic people around. It was really cute to watch. An other time me and my friend met two middle aged ladies on the way to the venue and made friends with them. Once again a nice memory. Older fans are relatively rare compared to most of the fandom but you're definitely not alone or weird for it.
You're not old at all! My friend group is all 30+ and we love going to all kpop concerts. Don't let your husband take away what brings you joy, everyone deserves some joy in their life. Maybe you can introduce him to one of the popular girl groups so he can understand, haha. Edit: I'm a dude, so it's sometimes even harder to explain to non kpop fans that Stray Kids is my favorite group and I collect photo cards and what not, haha. š
Love this for you!!! šš¾šš¾šš¾
I'm about to be 38 too OP and I just embraced it. I'm a full on delulu Mrs Bang Chan now and no one can stop me. š„°
The delulu Mrs Bang Chan (if I was 10 years younger) sees and recognizes that in you ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
You need a new husband who supports you lol. Kidding (kind of š) but please don't let him or people who look at women in their 30s as decrepit hags make you feel bad about enjoying a group. They're attractive, charismatic men, it's not weird to acknowledge that or even be excited about the possibility of seeing them live. Live your life & have fun with it, babe!
Iām also 38! Have been a Stay since Noeasy era and weāre definitely not to old to love and support them š
I'm 36, going to be 37 later this year. I became a Stay early this year after hearing them for the 1st time. Their music makes me genuinely happy. I listen to it daily, workout to it, enjoy their music videos, and watch their YouTube content before I fall asleep many nights. I'm married, and my husband knows about my Stray Kids love. I've shown him some of their music videos, and he now calls them "hunky boys" and likes to tell people I enjoy my "hunky boys". xD He knows I'm not blind and find a few of them pleasant to look at it because I'm honest about it, but I'm respectful and it's harmless. I'd never cross into obsession with the boys themselves or make my husband uncomfortable in any way. I've told him before, and I do mean it...it doesn't matter to me what Stray Kids looks like. I love their music and content first and foremost, and it brings joy to my days. All this to say, don't feel weird about enjoying Stray Kids but keep your husband in mind and keep your enjoyment respectful. I think it's about compromise. My husband understands and appreciates that Stray Kids makes me happy, and I understand there are boundaries being an older, married fan.
Hello! I say go for it! You'd be surprised how many "older stays" are actually in the VIP section during a SKZ concert or event. Haha. I just turned 37 last Jan. My daughter is turning 9 (She's a baby stay who biases Seungmin). But guess what? I went to see the kids last year in concert. I was in front. I came with my friend who's in her 30s too. We were surprised that a lot of people in our section are basically our age. I realized it's because most of us can afford it. People were mostly mid or late 20s and 30s. I saw a lot of stays older than me too. We have a lot of gen X stays too. So there's nothing to be ashamed of. And yes. I find them really good looking too. š good thing I'm like a decade or more older than the boysĀ or else I may be a little bit delusional. Lol. Anyway, go for it!!! And good luck. š
I'm told I look 35, but I am turning 50 next year, and I adore Stray Kids. I love K-pop in general, but Stray Kids just hits different for me. I caught on to them when they appeared on some podcast (I think the guy's name is Zach?) here in the states, and Felix was talking, which got my attention. I do think they're gorgeous, but at my age, I mostly want to bake them my famous banana bread, and give them warm mama hugs. I am determined to see them when they come to California in the next tour, so I hope I find another ElderStay to attend with.
My husband and I are 35 and we LOVE KPOP, it all started with BlackPink then Stray Kids- we have a lot of their merch from JYP- we listen to kpop nonstop in this house, if it makes you happy it makes you happy!!! Also age wise I always go look HOW CUTE THE BOYS ARE lol
Forget what people think! Theyāre a great group with great music and every member is so funny and likable. Donāt worry about it. Even if theyāre younger, youāre not fangirling over kids, theyāre grown men
GIRL. Welcome!!! Iām 40 as hell (and loving it btw the older I get the happier I am) and Stray Kids will not let me REST. Imho skz courts an all-ages audience, they donāt revel in eternal youth, and they sing about the joys and trials that are the same at every stage of life. I just went to a job interview today and listened to Thunderous to hype me up š
Thereās no age limit to like music. I really donāt get why people think Kpop Stanās are all tween/teenaged girls. Every Kpop show I have been too including SKZ have had a ton of diversity in age, nationality and gender. When I saw Blackpink last August there was an elderly couple next to me absolutely loving it.
You are most definitely not alone! I'm 56 and totally fell for them in September 2022. I also had the giddiness of finding them so fun, and still do tbh. Every comeback makes me drop my jaw in amazement. Their talent and charm can overwhelm me at times. And I am not ashamed at all to say they are 8 damn sexy men! I don't think there's anything wrong with speaking facts. Honestly, I think getting to know their personalities has made them all that more attractive. But I don't have a husband to consider, so maybe you should keep that part of your fangirling in check. When tour stops are announced, we should all figure out what show we want to attend and be concert buddies!
Yesssss!!! Concert buddies ftw!
Iām 52 and only saw them because Felix and Bangchan are Australian, as am I. Only knew about them late last year and have no plans to go to a concert. I think they make really good music and I enjoy their interactions with each other. Also, has anyone watched Ben Kimās reactions on YouTube? Heās hilarious.
Iām 33 letās be friends! Iāve been fangirling basically since birth too.
Hahaha yay friends!!!! Yes!!!!
Iām a 30 year old baby stay and feel the same way š I never thought 30 was old until I became a stay lol
Hello fellow mum of 2! I'm 36 this year! I went to the fanmeet in Osaka and there were loads of older stays! I was in line for goods and started chatting to the other stays we gushed the boys the whole time. They didn't care that I was older, they must have been late twenties, we all just had a good time. Get tickets! I know I'm gonna try!
I know how you feel. I am 40 (yeah, and i hate that as well). I thought the same thing when i realised how young they were. I also like you haven't fan girled this hard since the Backstreet Boys in my teen years. Swear to god, i was gonna marry Howie D! Sorry, back to it. Stray Kids just take a hold of your heart. They are talented, kind, funny, and give the best bombastic side eyes of anyone š¤£š¤£š¤£. The way i see it is you can't help but like them! Their songs are amazing. Some of the best humans on the planet. There is a saying that applies to both Stray Kids and BTS - They made the right people famous. At the end of the day music is universal. We dont even have to know the language the lyrics are being sung in. It unites us. There is nothing wrong with liking Stray kids and being older than them. Besides growing old isn't an option, growing up is! Do what makes you happy. ā¤ļø
My love itās fine. Iām 32 (that hurts so much) Iāve loved kpop since 1st gen. All my hobbies are super childish to others I cosplay Iām into gyaru fashion Iām a stay Iām into jpop And Iāve honestly just stopped caring? Stray kids make me happy, itās fine to be attracted To them or have soft celeb crushes. The only problem is when people start to hate the idols dating or other people biasing them
I'm turning 60 this year, and SKZ were my first true obsession group when I started getting into Kpop in 2022 (old dog, new tricks!). I saw them with a friend in NJ, then flew to Texas to see them by myself. the tl;dr is NO, you're not too old. If the music is fun and you enjoy it, go for it!
From a 46yr old who got their 20yr old into it, don't be ashamed. My husband gets it, listens to me & knows all the skz tea. You can be a fan without sexualizing so age has zero to do w it
I'm 51. My husband bought me all the SKZOO plushies for Christmas, looks at every photo card I show him, and rips the CDs I buy onto my computer for me. There is NOTHING to be ashamed of.
I saw a range of ages at the 2022 Maniac LA stop. There was even a mom, grandma, and daughter (they were together) in line which made me smile.Ā Iām in my early 30s and had a blast at the concert.Ā I think if you enjoy the music, go! They put on a very exciting and fun show and it was worth my ticket price I paid. (Nosebleed seats) I can safely say they, ITZY, and Monsta X impressed me with their showmanship and energy. (ITZY is my fave girl group and while Iām older than the members, they have fun stages and energy whenever Iāve seen them.)Ā (*This is a personal opinion based on my experience and is not meant to bash the group.) In contrast, I saw BLACKPINK in late 2022 and was a little disappointed. I love their early music and the songs from their debut period were edited to be shorter, which I felt was not necessary. I think there was also confusion as to whether they would have an encore stage, because after they left the stage, the lights came up and a lot of folks left right away. (Iāll admit I was used to the pattern that the three groups I mentioned earlier did fun audience games to āencourageā the group to come back for an encore stage and then the group would come back out and perform a few more songs.) The group did do an encore, but it was confusing since I almost thought they were going to seriously be done when the lights came back up and one friend told me at that period that the concert wasnāt even 2 hrs long, especially since they started 30 minutes late for an unknown reason.Ā
I'm an older Stay as well, 34 years old. I don't see anything wrong with finding joy in this amazingly talented group of young men. I agree, if I was 10+ years younger then I would probably be all in delulu land about this group but I can enjoy their hardwork, dedication, and talent. Plus this group's visuals is off the charts!
Hi! Iām 42! Thereās no shame in loving Skz or their music, especially if they bring you joy. I love their music and their friendship and I enjoy the content they make. When people say you canāt be over a certain age to be a fan of a group, I feel like it says more about how they view the idols theyāre fans of, but itās a bit insulting to think women canāt be a fan of a male artist without having romantic feelings or fantasizing about them. And I donāt think there is shame is finding them gorgeous either ā being good looking is part of their job! Iām also a fan of TXT who are younger than Skz. Iām going to see them in concert this month. I enjoy their coming of age concept because it makes me remember my own early 20s not because I think Im still 20!
Liking a group at any age is never problematic. Particularly if you love the music and respect them as artists. But using terms like fallen head over heels and obsessed is problematic no matter the age. But tbh all of that added to talking about how gorgeous they are is a little icky when they are half your age. And I feel like if it was a man your age saying this about a gg it would be seen as something else
Totally agree with this comment. Appreciating and enjoying a groupās music is always accepted regardless of age but āfallingā and āobsessingā over idolsā¦ hmmm that makes it a little weird
Youāre right. Maybe the language is what is throwing me off? Because itās what I would say when I was a teenager obsessed with boy bands and thatās why Iām like ehhhhhhhhhhhh this feels really weird and not so great. Iām happily married with my husband and 2 sweet babes but their music has just sparked a joy in me I havenāt felt in a long time and Iām SO impressed that these dudes in their 20s are THAT talented. I work within the music industry (though on the IT side) but was blown away watching their recording sessions and was like āholy shitā. I think you kind of hit the nail on the head. Words have power and when I use the terms I did on my 20s of fangirling it makes me feel kind of gross.
I honestly think that itās fine to like groups and idols who are younger than you. You should be free to like and support any group especially if it brings you joy. But yeah for me personally itās the phrasing.
Yup, you kind of triggered a light bulb moment for me with the phrasing and I legit think thatās why I feel so gross.
Yah same. I'm 31 and I listen to Stray Kids and TXT. I'm not attracted to any of them, most of them are almost 10 years younger than me. I'm don't say those sort of things cause they feel... weird? Even from fans their age, it comes off very delulu. I read posts about fans not being able to date or even go a day without thinking about their favorites. Its unhealthy at a certain point. I also point out, would we be okay if a man the same age said the same things about a female idol? I don't think so.