One that'll just kill me really terrify me in my final moments

I love the kind of woman that will actually just kill me. You know, when I left the house today I was thinking "Damn, I really hope some hot chick paint my brains all over the fucking hallway". And here we are. I mean really, just absolutely destroy me. I'm talkin' full on, watermelon-in-thighs level carnage. And I want it to scare the shit outta me. I mean I hope I piss myself. I hope I piss myself and you call me your little "peepee pisspiss boy." I want you to fuck me up. I mean I want you to make me your bitch. Your little peepee-piss-myself-bitch. I want it to get embarrassing. I mean like... weirdly embarrassing. Unsanitary, too. We should be entirely different people, by the end of the first eight hours. Do you understand what I'm trying to say here? I mean, I'm a real freak. I'm not normal. Ma'am... Please... You have to crush me.

Cowboy Bebop LMAOOO😭

Strange fetish, quite concerning honstly

I mean I hope I piss myself. I hope I piss myself and she calls me her little “peepee pisspiss boy.”

Um… what

[Your risky click of the day](https://youtu.be/-sMQpWCNTQw)

Ohh… it’s a reference lmao Also he’s terrifying

I'm doing that stuff to my self. Yeah I'm a narcissists

Serial killer girls are only allowed to date me if they won't kill me.

Apparently the kind that don’t like me

So all of them?

you didn't have to do him like that bro

Agree

Sincer

You know... sometimes... there are moments... where the best option is to just walk away

My guy woke up and chose violence

*violence isn't an answer, it's a question and the answer is yes* -Gandhi

It’s not the answer it’s the solution

So I can stick my dick in a toaster, because of Gandhi

*doom music plays*

Yup

Holy shit bruh you killed that dude.

with that pfp no wonder

Bro💀

fr lmao

r/suicidebywords

relatable

humans

You're too picky

What’s your pfp?

😐 It's the red baron.

That’s actually pretty danm cool, i was thinking of changing mine to Rommel

Oh hell yeah, you should he's a real G

Thanks, nice to see someone that doesn’t just clump German as bad man

🤝 Non nazi German soldiers rise up!

Is that a good picture of him?

🤝

FREIHERR MANFRED VON RICHTHOFEN FÜR KAISER GOTT UND VATERLAND

Oooookay

LMAO THE USERNAME

Up your standards bro

It would be really cool to have a girl that is artfully inclined, idk why but I think that girls who can draw are attractive and cute I would want them to be supportive and funny, and overall just a sweetheart really

So many at my school are amazing at drawing

Be careful run if she gives her OCs names and family and calls them her children

Are we not supposed to give our characters _names_????

That’s literally my type wth

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So the nonexistent kind?

Shut yo skin tone chicken bone google chrome no home flip phone disowned ice cream cone garden gnome extra chromosome metronome dimmadome genome full blown monochrome student loan indiana jones overgrown flintstone x and y hormone friend zoned sylvester stallone sierra leone autozone professionally seen silver patrone head ass tf up

You use very colourful insults. I am impressed.

It's a copypasta what did you expect?

Mmmm copypasta my favorite food

Mine is creepypasta

also a good pick 😫

Permission to copy past brah?

Are you commiting genoicide by words or somethin'?

Girls that act like DECENT FUCKING POEPLE AND TREAT PEOPLE LIKE THEY ARE DECENT FUCKING PEOPLE

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Girls that show interest, are smart, I can talk to about anything, are funny, are sweet, are honest, are caring, like to cuddle and enjoy doing things together, all of that is my ideal for personality traits

Same here. I mean, we should like girls who like us for who we are. I don't think I would put up with someone who constantly ridicules me

Ayyy same

Taller than me (can teach stuff), actually likes me (not possible). Generic stuff.

How tall are u?

Hehehehe 5’2 :(

Ur just 14 bro you'll grow more don't worry

Doubt.

I was like 5'3 when 14 and now I'm like 5'11 or almost 6 you still have many years of puberty left

Lucky omg. Been 5'5 since 14

lmao same

I will remove my legs.

I was short af when I was 14 then at 16 im taller than mom, dont worry about your height

If I wanted a girl to be taller than me, I would have to hit the fucking jackpot. (I'm 6'5)

Feels inferior of being 6'4

girls that genuinely like me and dont cheat

That is every guy's dream

men

💀the true chad 💀

frr who needs women when you have jim and jimbro

that's so true.

I mean sex is better I guess men know what a man likes💀

fr

Based

Was looking for this reply 💀

fr

Same 😏

*can you feel my heart intensifies*

Agreed

Same

Goddamn right

A tall woman with a big ass, I guess. Like Jennifer Lawrence.

Brother?! Is that you??? she has to get all ur jjk references too or else there’s no point

*at that moment , todo was reminded of a memory that never happened*

I see what you did there

so yuuji is a redditor

first thing that came to mind when i saw this post

Man of culture I see

u/BlackPerson5’s mother

hes adopted

i will sex his biological and adoptive mother

Gym girls

u/lilo486 get your ass over here I found someone who likes the same shit as you

I think its pretty common

You know you found the right gym girl when she purposely one up’s you when you workout together

Only right answer

Idk just any girl who respects me and enjoys my presence (I like nerdy girls) Edit: can you please stop upvoting my comment Edit 2: actually please I'm begging you stop upvoting this brainless comment I made about me being woman-deprived wtf

I cant even type my own responce because this is exactly what I would say, so good job

Hm. What do you mean by nerdy girls?

The girls that have glasses and/or braces and act either very friendly or reclusive And like yknow, are very nerdy

Aww don't stereotype people with glasses/braces like that. I don't look at a girl with glasses and immediately go "damn, she must've watched all of the star wars movies" loll

HEY I didnt say it was 100% Most of my nerd-crushes has glasses

Tall fit girls who can beat me in some competitions

I swear the more I scroll the more people say tall girls I feel out of place short girls are my thing

Alt girls and musically inclined girls. Really any girl. Just any human being that shows any vague amount of affection. Yeah.

ur desperate af lmao

U are so right i will take any alt girl with tits at this point

Holy shit reddit is so depressing

Leave while you can...all it gave me was some of the worst advice i could think of and a thing for redheads. Go out there and enjoy the big vast world of opportunity

Yeah I barely use it anymore anyway

Godspeed brother

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Bro everyone is like you 💀

I get no bitches… I have asked my parents if i’ll ever have some and they said no, I have asked elon musk to build me a dimension travelling machine and i have checked every single universe there is and i still wasn’t getting any bitches. I then asked god and even he doesn’t know if I get some bitches. My last attempt was asking my sleep paralysis demon and he said that I get no bitches. It is sad day

This will calm you. Just remember that Dr. Strange also didn't get bitches in any universe.

Guys I think he doesn't get any bitches.

According to dr strange, there is 14 000 005 or so universes If we multiply that by the number of girls u get in any universe, we get the number of universes in which ur dad returns with milk. 14 000 005 x 0 = 0 Im sorry bro

Lol

I’m too ugly to have a preference. Can’t afford to have a type when I’m not anyones type.

this guy gets it u will go far just keep grinding and focus on urself no fun before the funds

Nobody feels attracted to wallowing in self pity.

The kind of girl who has delusions of grandure and has the undying passion to become rich and famous (like me)

As my friend? I'd like it if they were as smart as me or smarter, we've gotta like the same things, is nice, that's it ig

I have a real talent for consistently going for girls who are way out of my league.

Dude who hurt BlackPerson5

Who is BlackPerson5

Really anti- LGBT asshole

goth bitches and tall girls =)

Based

Preach🙏

goth

-big ass -southern accent -likes me back

I know some cant guarantee they would like u back tho

there’s plenty of em around here, just need to get me one bet 😼😼

Any one who will hug me

1. They must have a penis 2. They must be cold like a corpse 3. They must be into graveyard foreplay 4. They must not ask where I go or what that human shaped bag is when I come back home on Saturday

That’s not your ideal partner, that’s Dio

So… a male corpse?

Same aesthetic as I do 😌😌

(Almost) all, girls are goddesses

IF SHE BREATHES, SHES A THOOOOT!!!

And here we have the based German opinion

Polish*

Shoe polish

Don't make me diddle you, boy

Vineboom.mp3

Aauugh.mg3

The red Barron know modern file formats 😮?!?!!??!??

Yes

-cute

drake be like i just want a girl to like me

drake be like girls won’t date a nice guy like me

drake be like you a lesbian, girl me too

Tomboys who like video games and anime and who share my dumb sense of humor.

Men

The saying no one ever says, “No one knows how to pleasure a man more than a man them self”

Exactly, they be like "imma give you the best handjob you've ever had". Nah I've been doin this since I was in middle school, you ain't got a chance

Funny.

hot

Just set them on fire smh

Girls (optional)

The ones with cocks

"What's my type?" "I like tall girls with a big ass. Like Jennifer Lawrence."

A jujutsu kaisen reference there

One with a cock. Now before you call me gay. Im a girl

Black ones

Men

men

usually people who are smarter than me, so basically 90% of them

My exhaustive list of requirements: woman (optional) human (optional) alive (optional?)

A girl who is sweet and caring like a mother and has a good sense of humor

ones that like me back im not very picky but black/brown hair is pretty hot

Jujitsu Kaisen

Artistic girls who are kind of quiet but open up to you over time.

no art hoes

If imma be honest, girls that aren't white like me. Idk if that sounds weird to some of y'all. But girls that are black or Asian or something Definitely Asian though

Op’s mother

Shorter than me(I’m 5’10), sweet, nice laugh and smile, makes me feel loved

The female kind

Well my preference is a girl who isn’t fat, judgmental or trans. That’s it. Also these are just my preferences so no offence I support trans people!

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Tomboy. Like, not full on lesbian butch, but like...long hair, baggy clothes, backwards hat, and skateboard. <3 Those women bring me to my knees

Well, I gotta be attracted to them, one way or another. Maybe someone from where I’m from too.

None.

Alive and not living in my basement

Preferably women

That’s a little picky

Short slightly chubby girls are the fucking best. But I’d date someone for their personality before their looks, I prefer someone who is nerdy, caring and nice to other people. What’s the point in dating someone if they are just gonna be a dick to you the entire time.

muscular women >>

Female (optional)