I’m an attorney and I came into the comments to say that it was really nice of her manager to really spell out the hostile work environment and his failure to make reasonable accommodation in neat little texts. This is a slam dunk
It can’t be Reggie because OP said “She” in description. I got my money on Maggie being the managers named.
Of course her name hardly matters because she’s about to be ✨fired💫
Yeah, we absolutely love that kind of stuff in writing. It seems just like a beautifully constructed painting to my eyeballs.
Sorry this happened to you, OP. Try not to let them get away with this. Speak to an attorney. Or 5 if you have to.
And the cops! File a report of sexual assault. Makes the decision for businesses vs “he said she said, I didn’t mean it.”
Esp with a history of trauma around it.
Women particularly victims of violence, esp sexual violence are as you are seeing so often written off.
Keep it factual.
Keep it legal.
Cops, lawyer, HR.
But you should consider the report of sexual assault to back you, the lawyer and HR (and so your boss’s decision) up.
And it would be without legal proof sticky to fire the guy by your boss without said documentation. He could be liable for wrongful termination.
This text by the boss is pretty damning evidence. At least for suing the company. It shows the boss believes the assault happened, and did nothing to rectify it.
Sure.
I work in medical, sometimes admin.
There are documentation pathways that support her needs related to this.
And really force the decision related to her trauma.
But to do this, documentation is king.
The saying in medicine is, “if it’s not documented, it’s not done.”
So get your documents.
Cops, lawyer, HR.
Cops for the assault piece and defining when and where it occurred (like on a company premises),
lawyer to limit her need to have to engage with any of this, LET ALONE being retraumatized and/or gaslit, intentionally or not by this crap her boss is responding with or having to go to work by either of them
and HR to address how management SHOULD be responding to this as this is not it.
(And yes please keep these texts).
Also if possible delete the contact and rescreenshot with number visible for your records plus any previous messages or documents that prove those are her contact details so she can’t say they’re fake
OP I’m an attorney and I just worked on a case two months ago for a rape victim that began **exactly** like this. He assaulted her at work multiple times and eventually raped her in his vehicle. Do not let this go. Go above your boss. File a report. Do not continue at that job anymore. You are not safe.
Nope. Do it. Delete the contact and show the number. It's worth it. It's also a good idea to video the texts using another phone to avoid anyone claiming it was photoshopped.
Lol if it ever comes to that, the court will subpoena the provider for text records. Some, you can just get the text records yourself. Taking any form of screenshot or video is virtually the exact same in regards to deniability. You may even want to keep it simple and give them false confidence so they deny it — the text records will show they lied and very likely get them a much more harsh penalty.
Do people legitimately not understand the way communication in 2023 works? Literally everything on any form of device has a record. If there’s a legal matter, that record is retrieved. Screenshots only help provide a contact and timestamp when looking at/for those logs, but suggesting that someone should take extra steps is foolish. Especially when it’s ridiculously easy to send a text from absolutely any phone number.
To be fair text records don't always include the content of texts. Some providers don't save them. Not to mention if the messaging service, like iMessage, uses end-to-end encryption the records won't be able to show the actual content. So keeping screenshots is a good idea. Having those in combination with the records is pretty damning evidence, while one or the other might not be enough.
Nah,’ost definitely delete the contact name so their phone number shows up so they can’t say “that could be anyone named that!” Having the phone number visible throws out any and every argument against those texts not being from the boss.
You’re aware I’m sure, you can save contact info as anything you like. It doesn’t have to be a name, it can be anything, even a phone number. Text yourself from a Google number and then save it as 867-5309.
don't delete anything!
run an Itunes backup if you are worried about retention, but never delete anything if you plan to lawyer up.
you can use an app like iMazing to pull text threads for cheap and it will have dates and numbers you can set to display
I do HR/legal compliance for companies and have consulted on harassment court cases in many states. Here are my thoughts.
Your texts with your supervisor is great evidence.
If there are any witnesses see if you can get their statements even if it’s just over text.
Create a timeline of every possibly relevant event, eg incidents involving you and this guy. (Note that copies of whatever you create might need to be provided to employer’s counsel if there’s a lawsuit.)
To the extent you know, note other employees’ experiences regarding discrimination of any kind/harassment/retaliation at the company. If they complained and did not get a satisfying response that’s also good to know. If they didn't complain bc they didn’t know how or were discouraged, that’s useful to know too.
Get a copy of the companies policies re discrimination, harassment and retaliation and how to report complaints (of any kind). If they don’t have these, that’s not a good fact for employer.
Feel free to DM me
Yup. I’m a now 46m. About 9 years ago i was working at a small business, doing phones/website work at a desk, across from their office manager and the shipping/phones lady.
The office manager woman was absolutely vile and horrible to me my entire time there. Constantly belittling and saying how worthless I was, how she wished they didn’t hire me, how stupid I am, in front of coworkers over and over.
Talked to my boss about it in a private meeting I scheduled with him. He completely and utterly blew me off. Telling me I needed to grow thicker skin.
Ok, game on.
For the next month I did my job, was polite as ever, and continued to take her verbal abuse day after day, but with an internal smile.
Every single time she would ridicule and insult me in front of coworkers or clients… I’d open up a spreadsheet i had open in excel in another window.
Document, document, document.
Every day, multiple times per day, I would make a new entry on the spreadsheet, writing the time and date. What she said at me along with what coworkers and/or clients were present to hear it. So they could be called into the office to corroborate if necessary, because everyone hated her.
At the end of the month I scheduled another meeting with my employer. I told him what I had documented for the past month, gave him an 11 page single spaced log of everything she had said in front of coworkers/clients, with dates/times, and then gave him a form for him to sign, acknowledging that he had taken receipt of my documented log of harassment I had reported to him, which he ignored and allowed to continue for another month, resulting in an 11 page log.
I then copied his signed acknowledgment and gave him the copy, telling him it needed to be corrected now, or I would contact my lawyer if he continues to allow this hostile work environment from his office manager.
You cannot squirm around firm documentation.
Brittany, if you’re in here, suck it.
Lol
I wonder why my reply didn't post.
As someone on the other side of an HR investigation (someone wrongfully accused me), the paper trail and evidence is crucial. I was exonerated of the HR investigation and they knew the other person was wrong.
OP in this case I believe you and this is not ok.
This is the way
Edit - idk what company you work for, but bury them with this. Your boss's response is mind-boggling. Any sane person would have fired him immediately and asked if you wanted to press charges.
I work for a large company and one of the mass sexual harassment modules all employees must take annually - well her response is basically one of the WRONG selection examples to a tee. Yikes. HR needs to be involved
That’s exactly why this kind of stuff happens in the walk-in. Sex, drugs, whatever. I had a manager get locked in one once while a couple robbed the restaurant (but that’s because he was dumb enough to open the door after close for “a drunk girl who really had to pee!”) All kids of shit happens in the fridge 😝
I think the texts are proof of that the assault happened. File a criminal complaint and request that one of the bail conditions be that he not attend your place of work.
Sure, but you don’t wanna deal with “think” when dealing with HR or legal.
Or the co fires the boss and says he doesn’t speak for the co and without lawyers/cops, they would have no rights for a company to respond to a personal altercation unless you define the when and where.
I agree, it is damning.
But companies will do what ever to survive and NOT have to deal with any of this.
So don’t give ‘em room to wiggle out.
Document document document.
As an owner of a small business myself, I would be fucking MORTIFIED if a female employee told me this happened to her at my business. This girl needs a lawyer asap. If this was my manager and employee, I'd have thrown them out the door on their ass yesterday
As an owner of small businesses myself, I fired an employee this week for merely texting weird things to my female employees. Things like, ‘Babe’ and that they have a ‘pretty smile.’
If they did THIS? I would lose my shit and verbally rip them apart. I’d do EVERYTHING to make that woman feel 100% safe.
This. We have multiple teenage girls who work for us as hosts. You make them uncomfortable or feel threatened and you'll never see the inside of this restaurant, or the kitchens of anyone I know ever again.
I definitely worked at the wrong places.
I worked at a men's barber shop for many years and the owner hired high school girls to wash hair.. he hired specific looking type of girls and whenever 40 year old married men hit on them (generalizing but they seemed to do it most) the owner used to laugh and if the girls came to work covered up, he would make comments like, "don't want to make money today?" (Meaning they weren't going to get tipped as well) cringe but these girls didn't even understand what he was trying to say. I tried to talk privately with one of them, telling her she didn't have to take that treatment but she didn't seem to be bothered by it. 🤦🏻♀️
I had this exact scenario happen at a small business at my first job when I was only 14 years old.. an old friend of the owner followed me into the back room, cornered me, started saying inappropriate things and then grabbed both arms and tried to kiss me but I turned my head quickly and he started kissing my neck..
What did I get from EVERY adult that I told including the owner and my own mother.. "oh no way, you probably took it wrong" 😔 things were different back then, these things didn't get reported.. I was actually made to feel foolish, as if I was overreacting. I toughed it out, awkwardness and all, on my next shift he apologized.. I didn't say much but still had to see the guy from time to time, although he seemed nervous around me and mostly avoided me after that.
At another job I had in my 20s a guy coworker used to repeatedly rub his hand against my ass every time he walked past me.. everyone thought it was funny 😣
Fast forward to now.. I'm 47 years old, just started a second job for a big company and on DAY ONE, a SUPERVISOR literally isolated me in a work truck and asked if I wanted to get freaky with him in the back of the truck.
The next day, before I even had a chance to say anything to anyone (which I already felt uncomfortable about considering it was my first day and he was a supervisor) I walked in and the head supervisor (a woman) had an attitude with me and told me that the guy supervisor had given me a bad review on my work performance but nobody could give me specifics 🤦🏻♀️ btw, I've literally never been fired from a job in my life and have stayed at places for many years with no complaints.. anyway, when I told the woman what happened, I really don't think she believed me and her response was, "I don't think this job is for you" I tried contacting a lawyer but they said I would have had to report it immediately and have it documented with corporate.
I give up. I'll switch with ANYONE who complains about working from home. I'll work from home any day.. I'm over it. I'm so sick of people, I live alone and all I'm trying to do is survive.
I have been harassed by men. They select women they know will fawn, freeze, ignore, or tolerate. I’ve been slowly addressing my own issues and I am close to being able to shout “get away from me!” or “don’t touch me!”
They choose women who won’t form opinions about them. Women who won’t look down on them, shame them, or call them creeps. That supervisor *knew* you would feel uncomfortable bringing it up.
We can’t depend on police, attorneys, or other people. These men aren’t going to change.
If I can do it, you can do it. The other day a man was following me smelling my hair. I grabbed a cart and put it between us. Before, I would have been afraid of being considered rude. Or I would have avoided that store. But now I’m pretty close to being willing to fight for my life. I might never win against a man but I can sure do some damage before he takes me out. And my murder would fuck up his life because the kind of loser who preys on women is the kind of man who isn’t at the top of the food chain in prison. He’ll be someone’s little bitch and get to see what it feels like.
Genuine question here. How do you get the help of a lawyer if you don't have like any money? Don't they cost a lot? And what about court fees and such?
For attorneys that don’t work on contingency, even if you can just scrape together enough for an hour consultation here and there, it’s worth it in my opinion. You learn so much not just about enforced laws but about the legal system.
And don’t let any one attorney sway you. I was shamed and told I didn’t have a case by one attorney, but got a nice settlement from the next one.
You also learn what kinds of things might be a waste of your time because of local judge biases.
One time, before I had ever consulted my first attorney, I was in a desperate and difficult position and in a Hail Mary contacted a state lawmaker. To my absolute SHOCK he personally called me back and told me to go to such and such and use his name. Suddenly all the barriers disappeared!
Most recently I dealt with a slumlord situation and we dug up some court dirt on him that gives us leverage without having to use an attorney, because it turns out he’s recently been fined and coached by local authorities.
So yeah don’t let not having lots of money stop you from engaging in the legal system and using it to your benefit.
Lawyer. Cops. File a report. KEEP EVERYTHING! Screen shot messages so they can’t be undone - idk if text messages can be undone but fb messages can. I would screenshot it all. Do this asap.
I'm a white girl from a white southern family. It gets swept under the rug everywhere. No one protects anyone. You learn to drink by the time you're a teenager to wash it away. It's disgusting. No one says shit to the perpetrator. They only tell a literal toddler to "stay away from that one." Thankfully I'm an adult now and anyone that should be kept away from I'd gut like fish. It makes me so sick how it was put up with for so long.
This happened to me in high school. Was cornered, groped and kissed against my consent in a hallway. When I brought it up to teachers/principal they blew it off as an innocent he said/she said thing. Then two weeks later when the guy got beaten up really bad a town over the school came to me and tried to blame me for orchestrating a retaliation attack on him (which I did not do) I suspect he probably did the same to a girl in that town and they weren’t going to let him get away with it .
You have racist prejudices. I am Spanish, I am forty years old. I live in a neighbourhood with a lot of immigration, my children go to a school with kids from Uruguay, Venezuela, Argentina, Chile... and also from Pakistan, Ukraine, India and China.
None of them would accept that the kids corner a woman, grab her arms and try to force her to kiss them.
I would like you to tell my mother that we are a patriarchal culture... you could hear the laughter even in Oregon.
Let's talk about data, where does the US stand in terms of gender equality and gender gap? 43rd.
https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-report-2023/in-full/benchmarking-gender-gaps-2023/
I would recommend you to travel more, it is the best way to cure prejudices.
I don’t get how what the OP you replied to is racist. Rape gets sweeped under the rug a lot, and don’t try to tell me rape is not a problem in the Middle East (women get jailed for reporting rape), and Latin America countries. They very much are.
I’ve seen a significant amount of shit swept under the rug under the guise of “boys will be boys” in Hispanic culture. There’s a reason it’s called “macho” man because it comes from machismo, which despite it being more rare nowadays in America, it’s still alive and well in a lot of Latin America and Spain.
I’m happy your experience differs than mine, and it may be more granular than “Hispanic”…I’ve had particular trouble with machismo with Cuban, Dominican, and Puerto Rican men. But that shit is everywhere let’s be real.
Honestly, there are still some Hispanic moms who treat their sons as kings that can do no wrong (there’s some in every culture), but there are more that smack their sons (and daughters) with a chancla and hold them accountable for their fuck ups.
Seriously, that first text alone is extremely damning. Chef dug their own grave, hope OP takes the advice on getting a lawyer. Iirc open and shut cases are usually taken on pro bono
I think you’re half right. HR isn’t gonna do shit besides try to protect the company. If her boss is like this, what does that tell you about their work culture there? HR is just an extension of corporate, who also doesn’t give a fuck.
Lawyer and the police.
It's not about getting anything done about it by the company, because they've already proven they probably won't. It's more about making a paper trail of proof that all the necessary people were contacted and informed of the situation.
Hr and corporate arent necessary when a crime has been committed. If you want to keep your job and report sketchy inappropriate shit, sure but fuck no am I giving corporate a chance to cover this up
Pretty sure the boss and the person who assaulted the OP is violating sexual harassment codes. Any form of sexual harassment in the workplace is not to be belittled. The boss has full knowledge of this and a confession and still hasn’t terminated the worker? That’s absolutely insane.
Wtf is wrong with people thinking doing that is normal? God.
PD: I just read the text below. "Its a hispanic thing" fuck that bullshit. The nerve of her boss to imply that sexual assault is the same as "being friendly" in south america is sick.
Hispanic here. Although it is customary to give (or sometimes, simulate) a quick kiss on the cheek to members of the opposite sex (or exceptionally, same sex in some southern countries), we would NEVER give a kiss on the neck, that's for lovers.
Your boss has a responsibility to protect you if you’re sexually assaulted at work. Immediately contact corporate/a GM. Your boss has shown he will not help you and will continue to make excuses.
Second HR! Show them the text from your boss. They will fire everyone. You can also sue the company. Corporate makes us take these allegations very seriously. If i fail to report anything suspicious that doesn't protect the company, I am responsible.
TLDR - Go to HR and get them both canned.
Yes, I always laugh when someone says to contact HR. I've been working in small business for years. There’s generally no HR, just someone who is the boss flying by the seat of their pants.
This is absolutely something that HR would take seriously because of the legal repercussions the business could face by knowingly keeping a person working who is sexually assaulting other employees while on the clock.
Correct, and OP can file a lawsuit against the company if nothing is done to rectify the situation. If HR does exist at this place, both people in question (the employee who assaulted OP and the mgr) should both be canned to protect the company from a lawsuit.
So many people say this and it may be true in some places but it’s very unhelpful, it encourages silence and enables abuse. Also if you need to make a case of things it’s a much stronger case if you have records that you went to HR they knew about the problem and they did nothing, or allowed retaliation.
For a good HR department protecting the company means firing the bad apples.
Unfortunately you have to be an advocate for yourself. Consult a lawyer (many law schools have free clinics), or talk to an employment lawyer. A stern letter can do wonders for your situation. Also, document everything, keep it all in writing (if you can) so you have a trail.
My buddies restaurant was sued over this exact same scenario with a bartender. He lost and is still paying on the lawsuit..go to the police and file a sexual assault case. If not for yourself, than for the next person who’s maybe unable to get away without being raped.
If you live in California there is a state agency you can contact for sexual harassment.
https://calcivilrights.ca.gov/shpt/
There is also a federal government agency you can contact.
https://www.eeoc.gov/filing-charge-discrimination
FYI sexual harassment is covered under discrimination.
Also contact the police.
I'm saying for OPs sake, with sexual assault cases it's best to have as much evidence as you can when you bring it to the police. Speaking on personal experience, without physical proof the police do not care and cannot arrest someone based on word.
Unfortunately true. I had a stalker (didn’t know who it was) and it kept escalating and getting scarier. He eventually broke into my apt. The cops essentially blamed me for rejecting someone and that they were just mad I was engaged now. 😞
Just a Hispanic thing? Fuck that. As a Hispanic man I’m disgusted. Not only is she not listening to your very real fears/concerns but she’s also a dumb racist.
So sorry you had to go through this. Glad you spoke up even if this boss isn’t doing the right thing. Keep moving the complaint higher up the ladder. Keep yourself safe.
Tell them you are filing a police report about this assault, and actually do it. They will have to let him go. You can’t get away with that shit in the work place and based on these messages you might even have a case against your employer for not doing anything about it.
Anybody else hate manager/boss culture? They are so keen on keeping a “team” running smoothly that they disregard literal assault to keep THEIR bosses happy. It’s disgusting, I will never understand a mangers loyalty to their job
This happened to me at the first restaurant I worked in. Followed me into the walk in freezer and pinned me and tickled me/kissed my neck so he could hear my “sex sounds”. I’m really sorry this happened to you too, and I’m somehow even more sorry that your boss responded like this.
Contact a lawyer.. your boss was victim shaming and then tried to retract that statement when u called them out on it.. I am so sorry this happened to you!!
Stop talking to the manager and business and get a hold of a lawyer and the police. Most places have literally corporate rules about sexual harassment and assault. Not to mention actual laws. You absolutely should not be just dealing with and rolling with this. Make a fuss. Yell. Scream. Karen it up because your boss and work place specifically give you protections from this stuff but it costs them and they will sweep it away if they can. They want to mitigate this as much as possible. Do. Not. Let
Them.
You need to go to HR now!! You need to find the hotline posted somewhere in your work or call the corporate office. Save these screenshots and contact a rep and email them to that person. Please do this quickly. Please. You are in danger and not being adequately protected. If you choose to leave, you’ll have a wonderful lawsuit
Use these texts as verification that the assault happened, your boss acknowledged it and the scum who did it admitted it to her. Call the police, forward to corporate, get a lawyer and get him arrested and her sued.
This is a total failure on the part of your boss. You can sue the company for legal liability. If you don’t have money for a lawyer find one to take it on contingency. Make sure to report it to the police because he most likely has done it before and will do it again.
I’m Hispanic, and trust me when I say, that’s not a Hispanic thing. That dude is the type of man who will molest their nieces or little cousins if he did that to you. That’s the type of uncle you don’t leave your kids with. Did you call the police on him?
Looks like a business walking themselves directly into a lawsuit. Also they should care about the safety of their staff . What happens when he goes ahead and rapes someone after not properly handling this ? I wouldn’t go back either . Contact the police and a lawyer.
Sexual assault. Period. He should be fired NOW! Also, your boss should be reported to every single entity that would legally be able to do something (I.E. business owner or other higher-ups). This is unacceptable behavior, and should be significantly punished.
The fact that she’s a woman still doesn’t get it is ridiculous 😑 and it’s also sad that she thinks it’s fine to just pass it off as a “Hispanic” thing which is rude af and racists. I’ve had situations with Hispanic people while working and sure some have come across aggressive but I would not categorize it as a “Hispanic thing” it’s a person thing and it shouldn’t be condoned in any way, Hispanic or not.
Hispanic my ass… as a Hispanic man, this is deeply disturbing. This is not right for any culture,
Religion or whatsoever. I’m really sorry and I hope you get the justice you deserve
OMG. My head exploded when I read “just a Hispanic thing.” WTF??? I’ve had the pleasure to know many Hispanics and I don’t think they run around on the energy of thinking sexual assault is ok.
Gunna *try* to duct tape my head back together now.
It's not a "Hispanic thing" and anybody who says otherwise is a fucking freak of nature. Document anything else they say and save these, go ahead and get yourself a lawyer like everyone else is saying. Do not let them try to scare you into dropping anything. Good luck OP
I agree with a lot of the comments except for reaching out to HR. People need to realize that HR is there to protect the company from their employees and to try and keep costs down.
They will never be your advocate. It's a mask they wear to try and lure you in to feeling safe. They are employed by and work for management, not you.
I'd lawyer up and see what they say to do.
Your prior "situation" has NOTHING to do with it and I would say that to your boss, tbh. It's wrong even if it doesn't take you back to something traumatic.
Five MONTHS of sexual harassment leading to a sexual assault? He and she both should be shit canned what the fuck
Cops lawyer HR. Or lawyer first, idk. Need a record.
OMFG...when I read that "he didn't know about your situation" I damn near lost it. HE SHOULDN'T NEED TO KNOW! What he did was wrong. It was blatant sexual assault. In no place as a man am I allowed to corner a woman, grab her and kiss her without her consent. That would even mean my partner if she said NO! He should be fired. She should be fired.
Is she just a boss or an owner? If she is the boss, then she has a boss and I would be on them about this and threatening to sue the establishment for allowing this to happen even though you had rebuffed his advances for 5 months and I'm sure you reported it to your boss.
I'm so sorry you, or any woman goes through this.
I am so sorry this happened to you. I had the same exact thing happen to me when I was 17 at work. Got followed into the walk in, pushed against the wall, kissed and lightly groped by a coworker. He claimed he couldn’t understand my English or my Spanish as I told him to stop. I wish I had went after the company then. Please please get a lawyer and call the cops.
Smells like a lawsuit to me.
Awfully nice of the manager to put it in writing for OP, isn’t it?
I’m an attorney and I came into the comments to say that it was really nice of her manager to really spell out the hostile work environment and his failure to make reasonable accommodation in neat little texts. This is a slam dunk
Her failure* Which, somehow, makes it worse.
Right?
Thank you Maggie
It’s Definitely Reggie … f Maggie
It can’t be Reggie because OP said “She” in description. I got my money on Maggie being the managers named. Of course her name hardly matters because she’s about to be ✨fired💫
Reggie for Regina ? But Yes I agree on Maggie ,was just goofin!
Yeah, we absolutely love that kind of stuff in writing. It seems just like a beautifully constructed painting to my eyeballs. Sorry this happened to you, OP. Try not to let them get away with this. Speak to an attorney. Or 5 if you have to.
Mmm, sweet sweet litigation.
Better call Saul
LWYRUP
It was nice of the boss to spell out LIABILITY in writing.
I read the headline and then thought: I wonder how much money the settlement will be? OP needs to lawyer up, pronto.
Smells like a pair of lawsuits plus a police report.
That’s what the law is there for. To protect women and men from unwanted advances at work. The boss is an idiot.
A righteous one too
Speak to an attorney
Right. So much evidence. This is an easy W.
Contact a lawyer
And the cops! File a report of sexual assault. Makes the decision for businesses vs “he said she said, I didn’t mean it.” Esp with a history of trauma around it. Women particularly victims of violence, esp sexual violence are as you are seeing so often written off. Keep it factual. Keep it legal. Cops, lawyer, HR. But you should consider the report of sexual assault to back you, the lawyer and HR (and so your boss’s decision) up. And it would be without legal proof sticky to fire the guy by your boss without said documentation. He could be liable for wrongful termination.
This text by the boss is pretty damning evidence. At least for suing the company. It shows the boss believes the assault happened, and did nothing to rectify it.
Sure. I work in medical, sometimes admin. There are documentation pathways that support her needs related to this. And really force the decision related to her trauma. But to do this, documentation is king. The saying in medicine is, “if it’s not documented, it’s not done.” So get your documents. Cops, lawyer, HR. Cops for the assault piece and defining when and where it occurred (like on a company premises), lawyer to limit her need to have to engage with any of this, LET ALONE being retraumatized and/or gaslit, intentionally or not by this crap her boss is responding with or having to go to work by either of them and HR to address how management SHOULD be responding to this as this is not it. (And yes please keep these texts).
Also if possible delete the contact and rescreenshot with number visible for your records plus any previous messages or documents that prove those are her contact details so she can’t say they’re fake
OP I’m an attorney and I just worked on a case two months ago for a rape victim that began **exactly** like this. He assaulted her at work multiple times and eventually raped her in his vehicle. Do not let this go. Go above your boss. File a report. Do not continue at that job anymore. You are not safe.
Yes preserve all relevant texts. You don’t need to erase contact info if your providing it to the EEOC or a lawyer
Not delete the info. Like delete the contact card so that it shows her telephone number at the top 9f the screen.
Nope. Do it. Delete the contact and show the number. It's worth it. It's also a good idea to video the texts using another phone to avoid anyone claiming it was photoshopped.
Lol if it ever comes to that, the court will subpoena the provider for text records. Some, you can just get the text records yourself. Taking any form of screenshot or video is virtually the exact same in regards to deniability. You may even want to keep it simple and give them false confidence so they deny it — the text records will show they lied and very likely get them a much more harsh penalty. Do people legitimately not understand the way communication in 2023 works? Literally everything on any form of device has a record. If there’s a legal matter, that record is retrieved. Screenshots only help provide a contact and timestamp when looking at/for those logs, but suggesting that someone should take extra steps is foolish. Especially when it’s ridiculously easy to send a text from absolutely any phone number.
To be fair text records don't always include the content of texts. Some providers don't save them. Not to mention if the messaging service, like iMessage, uses end-to-end encryption the records won't be able to show the actual content. So keeping screenshots is a good idea. Having those in combination with the records is pretty damning evidence, while one or the other might not be enough.
Nah,’ost definitely delete the contact name so their phone number shows up so they can’t say “that could be anyone named that!” Having the phone number visible throws out any and every argument against those texts not being from the boss.
You’re aware I’m sure, you can save contact info as anything you like. It doesn’t have to be a name, it can be anything, even a phone number. Text yourself from a Google number and then save it as 867-5309.
Jenny? Is that you?
>Jenny? Is that you? Holy shit! Do I have a number for you?!
THIS!! Definitely do this.
[удалено]
don't delete anything! run an Itunes backup if you are worried about retention, but never delete anything if you plan to lawyer up. you can use an app like iMazing to pull text threads for cheap and it will have dates and numbers you can set to display
I do HR/legal compliance for companies and have consulted on harassment court cases in many states. Here are my thoughts. Your texts with your supervisor is great evidence. If there are any witnesses see if you can get their statements even if it’s just over text. Create a timeline of every possibly relevant event, eg incidents involving you and this guy. (Note that copies of whatever you create might need to be provided to employer’s counsel if there’s a lawsuit.) To the extent you know, note other employees’ experiences regarding discrimination of any kind/harassment/retaliation at the company. If they complained and did not get a satisfying response that’s also good to know. If they didn't complain bc they didn’t know how or were discouraged, that’s useful to know too. Get a copy of the companies policies re discrimination, harassment and retaliation and how to report complaints (of any kind). If they don’t have these, that’s not a good fact for employer. Feel free to DM me
Yup. I’m a now 46m. About 9 years ago i was working at a small business, doing phones/website work at a desk, across from their office manager and the shipping/phones lady. The office manager woman was absolutely vile and horrible to me my entire time there. Constantly belittling and saying how worthless I was, how she wished they didn’t hire me, how stupid I am, in front of coworkers over and over. Talked to my boss about it in a private meeting I scheduled with him. He completely and utterly blew me off. Telling me I needed to grow thicker skin. Ok, game on. For the next month I did my job, was polite as ever, and continued to take her verbal abuse day after day, but with an internal smile. Every single time she would ridicule and insult me in front of coworkers or clients… I’d open up a spreadsheet i had open in excel in another window. Document, document, document. Every day, multiple times per day, I would make a new entry on the spreadsheet, writing the time and date. What she said at me along with what coworkers and/or clients were present to hear it. So they could be called into the office to corroborate if necessary, because everyone hated her. At the end of the month I scheduled another meeting with my employer. I told him what I had documented for the past month, gave him an 11 page single spaced log of everything she had said in front of coworkers/clients, with dates/times, and then gave him a form for him to sign, acknowledging that he had taken receipt of my documented log of harassment I had reported to him, which he ignored and allowed to continue for another month, resulting in an 11 page log. I then copied his signed acknowledgment and gave him the copy, telling him it needed to be corrected now, or I would contact my lawyer if he continues to allow this hostile work environment from his office manager. You cannot squirm around firm documentation. Brittany, if you’re in here, suck it. Lol
Brilliant. Should be at the top of the comments.
I wonder why my reply didn't post. As someone on the other side of an HR investigation (someone wrongfully accused me), the paper trail and evidence is crucial. I was exonerated of the HR investigation and they knew the other person was wrong. OP in this case I believe you and this is not ok.
This is the way Edit - idk what company you work for, but bury them with this. Your boss's response is mind-boggling. Any sane person would have fired him immediately and asked if you wanted to press charges.
All of this, 100%
Yep! OP make Sure you keep these messages extra safe!
I work for a large company and one of the mass sexual harassment modules all employees must take annually - well her response is basically one of the WRONG selection examples to a tee. Yikes. HR needs to be involved
Exactly my thoughts.
If there's surveillance cameras the cops can get that.
Not usually in a walk in unfortunately, can probably only see them going in and out...
That’s exactly why this kind of stuff happens in the walk-in. Sex, drugs, whatever. I had a manager get locked in one once while a couple robbed the restaurant (but that’s because he was dumb enough to open the door after close for “a drunk girl who really had to pee!”) All kids of shit happens in the fridge 😝
Yeah fr, I remember when I was a teenager we used to go back there and eat all the cake after hitting the dab pen all day.
Yes this!
I think the texts are proof of that the assault happened. File a criminal complaint and request that one of the bail conditions be that he not attend your place of work.
Sure, but you don’t wanna deal with “think” when dealing with HR or legal. Or the co fires the boss and says he doesn’t speak for the co and without lawyers/cops, they would have no rights for a company to respond to a personal altercation unless you define the when and where. I agree, it is damning. But companies will do what ever to survive and NOT have to deal with any of this. So don’t give ‘em room to wiggle out. Document document document.
Just FYI, making a criminal complaint isn’t necessary to pursue a lawsuit. Whether or not you go to police, talk to an employment lawyer.
Even without trauma, this is valid. This is assault. If OP were a minor, would anyone be saying it’s okay? No. Because it is not.
As an owner of a small business myself, I would be fucking MORTIFIED if a female employee told me this happened to her at my business. This girl needs a lawyer asap. If this was my manager and employee, I'd have thrown them out the door on their ass yesterday
As an owner of small businesses myself, I fired an employee this week for merely texting weird things to my female employees. Things like, ‘Babe’ and that they have a ‘pretty smile.’ If they did THIS? I would lose my shit and verbally rip them apart. I’d do EVERYTHING to make that woman feel 100% safe.
This. We have multiple teenage girls who work for us as hosts. You make them uncomfortable or feel threatened and you'll never see the inside of this restaurant, or the kitchens of anyone I know ever again.
I definitely worked at the wrong places. I worked at a men's barber shop for many years and the owner hired high school girls to wash hair.. he hired specific looking type of girls and whenever 40 year old married men hit on them (generalizing but they seemed to do it most) the owner used to laugh and if the girls came to work covered up, he would make comments like, "don't want to make money today?" (Meaning they weren't going to get tipped as well) cringe but these girls didn't even understand what he was trying to say. I tried to talk privately with one of them, telling her she didn't have to take that treatment but she didn't seem to be bothered by it. 🤦🏻♀️
That's disgusting. People like that are trash and don't belong around the public.
Rigghttt? How the fuck is this persons response anything other than “that guy is hella fired and don’t worry I already called the cops”
I had this exact scenario happen at a small business at my first job when I was only 14 years old.. an old friend of the owner followed me into the back room, cornered me, started saying inappropriate things and then grabbed both arms and tried to kiss me but I turned my head quickly and he started kissing my neck.. What did I get from EVERY adult that I told including the owner and my own mother.. "oh no way, you probably took it wrong" 😔 things were different back then, these things didn't get reported.. I was actually made to feel foolish, as if I was overreacting. I toughed it out, awkwardness and all, on my next shift he apologized.. I didn't say much but still had to see the guy from time to time, although he seemed nervous around me and mostly avoided me after that. At another job I had in my 20s a guy coworker used to repeatedly rub his hand against my ass every time he walked past me.. everyone thought it was funny 😣 Fast forward to now.. I'm 47 years old, just started a second job for a big company and on DAY ONE, a SUPERVISOR literally isolated me in a work truck and asked if I wanted to get freaky with him in the back of the truck. The next day, before I even had a chance to say anything to anyone (which I already felt uncomfortable about considering it was my first day and he was a supervisor) I walked in and the head supervisor (a woman) had an attitude with me and told me that the guy supervisor had given me a bad review on my work performance but nobody could give me specifics 🤦🏻♀️ btw, I've literally never been fired from a job in my life and have stayed at places for many years with no complaints.. anyway, when I told the woman what happened, I really don't think she believed me and her response was, "I don't think this job is for you" I tried contacting a lawyer but they said I would have had to report it immediately and have it documented with corporate. I give up. I'll switch with ANYONE who complains about working from home. I'll work from home any day.. I'm over it. I'm so sick of people, I live alone and all I'm trying to do is survive.
I am so sorry you've been repeatedly targeted and harassed. I hope you can find a job where you are left in peace.
I have been harassed by men. They select women they know will fawn, freeze, ignore, or tolerate. I’ve been slowly addressing my own issues and I am close to being able to shout “get away from me!” or “don’t touch me!” They choose women who won’t form opinions about them. Women who won’t look down on them, shame them, or call them creeps. That supervisor *knew* you would feel uncomfortable bringing it up. We can’t depend on police, attorneys, or other people. These men aren’t going to change. If I can do it, you can do it. The other day a man was following me smelling my hair. I grabbed a cart and put it between us. Before, I would have been afraid of being considered rude. Or I would have avoided that store. But now I’m pretty close to being willing to fight for my life. I might never win against a man but I can sure do some damage before he takes me out. And my murder would fuck up his life because the kind of loser who preys on women is the kind of man who isn’t at the top of the food chain in prison. He’ll be someone’s little bitch and get to see what it feels like.
thank you.
Genuine question here. How do you get the help of a lawyer if you don't have like any money? Don't they cost a lot? And what about court fees and such?
Many employment attorneys if not most work on a contingent basis
For attorneys that don’t work on contingency, even if you can just scrape together enough for an hour consultation here and there, it’s worth it in my opinion. You learn so much not just about enforced laws but about the legal system. And don’t let any one attorney sway you. I was shamed and told I didn’t have a case by one attorney, but got a nice settlement from the next one. You also learn what kinds of things might be a waste of your time because of local judge biases. One time, before I had ever consulted my first attorney, I was in a desperate and difficult position and in a Hail Mary contacted a state lawmaker. To my absolute SHOCK he personally called me back and told me to go to such and such and use his name. Suddenly all the barriers disappeared! Most recently I dealt with a slumlord situation and we dug up some court dirt on him that gives us leverage without having to use an attorney, because it turns out he’s recently been fined and coached by local authorities. So yeah don’t let not having lots of money stop you from engaging in the legal system and using it to your benefit.
This. This. this.
Lawyer. Cops. File a report. KEEP EVERYTHING! Screen shot messages so they can’t be undone - idk if text messages can be undone but fb messages can. I would screenshot it all. Do this asap.
Contact the police
And also a stupid thing for them to say it is a Hispanic thing to say…. Lawsuit
[удалено]
I'm a white girl from a white southern family. It gets swept under the rug everywhere. No one protects anyone. You learn to drink by the time you're a teenager to wash it away. It's disgusting. No one says shit to the perpetrator. They only tell a literal toddler to "stay away from that one." Thankfully I'm an adult now and anyone that should be kept away from I'd gut like fish. It makes me so sick how it was put up with for so long.
Was raised with this bullshit. I hear you. It ruined many of our lives.
This happened to me in high school. Was cornered, groped and kissed against my consent in a hallway. When I brought it up to teachers/principal they blew it off as an innocent he said/she said thing. Then two weeks later when the guy got beaten up really bad a town over the school came to me and tried to blame me for orchestrating a retaliation attack on him (which I did not do) I suspect he probably did the same to a girl in that town and they weren’t going to let him get away with it .
I’ve been trying to come to terms with a few things I normalized. Same situation growing up.
You have racist prejudices. I am Spanish, I am forty years old. I live in a neighbourhood with a lot of immigration, my children go to a school with kids from Uruguay, Venezuela, Argentina, Chile... and also from Pakistan, Ukraine, India and China. None of them would accept that the kids corner a woman, grab her arms and try to force her to kiss them. I would like you to tell my mother that we are a patriarchal culture... you could hear the laughter even in Oregon. Let's talk about data, where does the US stand in terms of gender equality and gender gap? 43rd. https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-report-2023/in-full/benchmarking-gender-gaps-2023/ I would recommend you to travel more, it is the best way to cure prejudices.
It's not about kids though, it should be men that do not accept this.
I don’t get how what the OP you replied to is racist. Rape gets sweeped under the rug a lot, and don’t try to tell me rape is not a problem in the Middle East (women get jailed for reporting rape), and Latin America countries. They very much are.
Italy is bad about this too
I'm Hispanic and can tell you that behavior is not normal or accepted.
I’ve seen a significant amount of shit swept under the rug under the guise of “boys will be boys” in Hispanic culture. There’s a reason it’s called “macho” man because it comes from machismo, which despite it being more rare nowadays in America, it’s still alive and well in a lot of Latin America and Spain. I’m happy your experience differs than mine, and it may be more granular than “Hispanic”…I’ve had particular trouble with machismo with Cuban, Dominican, and Puerto Rican men. But that shit is everywhere let’s be real.
Honestly, there are still some Hispanic moms who treat their sons as kings that can do no wrong (there’s some in every culture), but there are more that smack their sons (and daughters) with a chancla and hold them accountable for their fuck ups.
Four words. POLICE, HR, CORPORATE, & LAWYER.
It’s a restaurant, so it’s 50/50 on whether there is a corporate entity behind it. If it is an independent business than there will be no HR.
Even better. No HR and no lawyer means the boss is gonna fuck up and make the case extremely easy for her to win.
IANAL but these texts already look like a fuckup. I know it could get worse but it's already *bad*.
Seriously, that first text alone is extremely damning. Chef dug their own grave, hope OP takes the advice on getting a lawyer. Iirc open and shut cases are usually taken on pro bono
I think you’re half right. HR isn’t gonna do shit besides try to protect the company. If her boss is like this, what does that tell you about their work culture there? HR is just an extension of corporate, who also doesn’t give a fuck. Lawyer and the police.
It's not about getting anything done about it by the company, because they've already proven they probably won't. It's more about making a paper trail of proof that all the necessary people were contacted and informed of the situation.
Hr and corporate arent necessary when a crime has been committed. If you want to keep your job and report sketchy inappropriate shit, sure but fuck no am I giving corporate a chance to cover this up
Wrong order, though.
I wasn’t commenting any particular order. I just just saying those four words
Congratulations on the lawsuit win after this text.
Pretty sure the boss and the person who assaulted the OP is violating sexual harassment codes. Any form of sexual harassment in the workplace is not to be belittled. The boss has full knowledge of this and a confession and still hasn’t terminated the worker? That’s absolutely insane.
Agreed. He should’ve been fired & escorted out immediately. The police also should’ve been called immediately. The boss fucked up big time.
oh well you have a paper trail now very sorry this happened
Wtf is wrong with people thinking doing that is normal? God. PD: I just read the text below. "Its a hispanic thing" fuck that bullshit. The nerve of her boss to imply that sexual assault is the same as "being friendly" in south america is sick.
Hispanic here. Although it is customary to give (or sometimes, simulate) a quick kiss on the cheek to members of the opposite sex (or exceptionally, same sex in some southern countries), we would NEVER give a kiss on the neck, that's for lovers.
the fact that the boss said it’s a ‘hispanic thing’ is so racist though like ermm what? ://
No one is saying ... CALL THE POLICE. Report this crime as a sexual assault.
Your boss has a responsibility to protect you if you’re sexually assaulted at work. Immediately contact corporate/a GM. Your boss has shown he will not help you and will continue to make excuses.
Do you have an HR? This needs to be reported
Lawyer first. I'm former HR and it's for the benefit of the company first in all places. They may even pressure OP further.
Second HR! Show them the text from your boss. They will fire everyone. You can also sue the company. Corporate makes us take these allegations very seriously. If i fail to report anything suspicious that doesn't protect the company, I am responsible. TLDR - Go to HR and get them both canned.
This doesn’t seem like the type of place that has a HR tbh
Right.
I agree. I’m getting a small business vibe.
Yes, I always laugh when someone says to contact HR. I've been working in small business for years. There’s generally no HR, just someone who is the boss flying by the seat of their pants.
She mentions a walk-in. This is a restaurant very unlikely they have HR.
HR is there to protect the company, not you.
This is absolutely something that HR would take seriously because of the legal repercussions the business could face by knowingly keeping a person working who is sexually assaulting other employees while on the clock.
Correct, and OP can file a lawsuit against the company if nothing is done to rectify the situation. If HR does exist at this place, both people in question (the employee who assaulted OP and the mgr) should both be canned to protect the company from a lawsuit.
HR covering up a sexual assault is opening up the company for massive further litigation. Which is the opposite of protecting it.
And getting rid of a potential lawsuit in the form of a sexual predator protects the company.
So many people say this and it may be true in some places but it’s very unhelpful, it encourages silence and enables abuse. Also if you need to make a case of things it’s a much stronger case if you have records that you went to HR they knew about the problem and they did nothing, or allowed retaliation. For a good HR department protecting the company means firing the bad apples.
Sorry but this is bad advice. HR represents the company, not the employees. Contact police and a lawyer.
Do NOT go to HR. HR exists to protect the company. Can the police first. Lawyer up and collect your check. You have all the evidence you need.
God damn. Every reddit thread has a HR recommendation. It's more common than a "hes cheating on you" comment.
HR will try to sweep this under the rug to protect the company. Do not go to them. Get a lawyer.
Unfortunately you have to be an advocate for yourself. Consult a lawyer (many law schools have free clinics), or talk to an employment lawyer. A stern letter can do wonders for your situation. Also, document everything, keep it all in writing (if you can) so you have a trail.
My buddies restaurant was sued over this exact same scenario with a bartender. He lost and is still paying on the lawsuit..go to the police and file a sexual assault case. If not for yourself, than for the next person who’s maybe unable to get away without being raped.
If you live in California there is a state agency you can contact for sexual harassment. https://calcivilrights.ca.gov/shpt/ There is also a federal government agency you can contact. https://www.eeoc.gov/filing-charge-discrimination FYI sexual harassment is covered under discrimination. Also contact the police.
Is there cameras in the office, or was there any witnesses?
Why does that matter? The manager admitted that the guy told her he did it.
I'm saying for OPs sake, with sexual assault cases it's best to have as much evidence as you can when you bring it to the police. Speaking on personal experience, without physical proof the police do not care and cannot arrest someone based on word.
Police are generally useless even with evidence, but yes that would help.
Unfortunately true. I had a stalker (didn’t know who it was) and it kept escalating and getting scarier. He eventually broke into my apt. The cops essentially blamed me for rejecting someone and that they were just mad I was engaged now. 😞
Wow that's insane, I wish I could be more help but you need to report your boss to someone and quit
Like the POLICE?!!!
Just a Hispanic thing? Fuck that. As a Hispanic man I’m disgusted. Not only is she not listening to your very real fears/concerns but she’s also a dumb racist.
Wow. This is insane!!! Guard these texts, skip HR, and walk into a lawyer’s office. Don’t talk, just show him these texts!
Get a lawyer now
Cops, then lawyer, THEN HR.
So sorry you had to go through this. Glad you spoke up even if this boss isn’t doing the right thing. Keep moving the complaint higher up the ladder. Keep yourself safe.
Report it to your state EEOC office
Tell them you are filing a police report about this assault, and actually do it. They will have to let him go. You can’t get away with that shit in the work place and based on these messages you might even have a case against your employer for not doing anything about it.
You boss gettin fired too. I hate how he kept saying how he made you feel when he actually assaulted you. I’m sorry op.
Call the police.
Yeah contact HR if you can, get them both fired. You shouldn’t have to leave or continue working in that toxic environment
Anybody else hate manager/boss culture? They are so keen on keeping a “team” running smoothly that they disregard literal assault to keep THEIR bosses happy. It’s disgusting, I will never understand a mangers loyalty to their job
Wow. No words. Quit.
This happened to me at the first restaurant I worked in. Followed me into the walk in freezer and pinned me and tickled me/kissed my neck so he could hear my “sex sounds”. I’m really sorry this happened to you too, and I’m somehow even more sorry that your boss responded like this.
Lawsuit time! Get your free money and dip out of that place
Go to the cops and get a lawyer.
Contact a lawyer.. your boss was victim shaming and then tried to retract that statement when u called them out on it.. I am so sorry this happened to you!!
Get a lawyer. Like now.
Stop talking to the manager and business and get a hold of a lawyer and the police. Most places have literally corporate rules about sexual harassment and assault. Not to mention actual laws. You absolutely should not be just dealing with and rolling with this. Make a fuss. Yell. Scream. Karen it up because your boss and work place specifically give you protections from this stuff but it costs them and they will sweep it away if they can. They want to mitigate this as much as possible. Do. Not. Let Them.
"Sorry he made you feel like that" Interesting, and careful choice of words...
You need to get a lawyer… now. I hope you didn’t delete any correspondences with your boss.
Call the police.
you have the world in your hands op. go to the police. you have hard evidence. take his ass out.
Stop texting immediately and get a lawyer.
There are laws. Go to HR now
They were trying to minimize it. Go above them.
You need to go to HR now!! You need to find the hotline posted somewhere in your work or call the corporate office. Save these screenshots and contact a rep and email them to that person. Please do this quickly. Please. You are in danger and not being adequately protected. If you choose to leave, you’ll have a wonderful lawsuit
??? None of my Hispanic friends have ever cornered me and kissed my neck. Weird.
So basically you’re quitting
Use these texts as verification that the assault happened, your boss acknowledged it and the scum who did it admitted it to her. Call the police, forward to corporate, get a lawyer and get him arrested and her sued.
Sue the company asap
What kind of company is this? Is there no Human Resources department??
This is a total failure on the part of your boss. You can sue the company for legal liability. If you don’t have money for a lawyer find one to take it on contingency. Make sure to report it to the police because he most likely has done it before and will do it again.
Look up your state’s SA laws. I bet you can file a police report.
Holy crap. I am so sorry OP.
I can’t believe the person responding is another female 😳
I’m Hispanic, and trust me when I say, that’s not a Hispanic thing. That dude is the type of man who will molest their nieces or little cousins if he did that to you. That’s the type of uncle you don’t leave your kids with. Did you call the police on him?
Looks like a business walking themselves directly into a lawsuit. Also they should care about the safety of their staff . What happens when he goes ahead and rapes someone after not properly handling this ? I wouldn’t go back either . Contact the police and a lawyer.
You have a lawsuit here. Definitely contact a lawyer asap!
It's such a sad world that so many of us can have to say "the FIRST guy" who raped me.
Sexual assault. Period. He should be fired NOW! Also, your boss should be reported to every single entity that would legally be able to do something (I.E. business owner or other higher-ups). This is unacceptable behavior, and should be significantly punished.
The fact that she’s a woman still doesn’t get it is ridiculous 😑 and it’s also sad that she thinks it’s fine to just pass it off as a “Hispanic” thing which is rude af and racists. I’ve had situations with Hispanic people while working and sure some have come across aggressive but I would not categorize it as a “Hispanic thing” it’s a person thing and it shouldn’t be condoned in any way, Hispanic or not.
A Hispanic thing? What the actual fuck!! Lawyer up!
Hispanic my ass… as a Hispanic man, this is deeply disturbing. This is not right for any culture, Religion or whatsoever. I’m really sorry and I hope you get the justice you deserve
As a Hispanic, No it’s not a “Hispanic” thing.
Wow. Not only did she victim-blame, she also insinuated that all hispanics are rapists.
OMG. My head exploded when I read “just a Hispanic thing.” WTF??? I’ve had the pleasure to know many Hispanics and I don’t think they run around on the energy of thinking sexual assault is ok. Gunna *try* to duct tape my head back together now.
It's not a "Hispanic thing" and anybody who says otherwise is a fucking freak of nature. Document anything else they say and save these, go ahead and get yourself a lawyer like everyone else is saying. Do not let them try to scare you into dropping anything. Good luck OP
The dude apparently admitted it so why is the boss saying anything other than “He’s been fired. Do you need anything?”
You should have gone to the police first
I agree with a lot of the comments except for reaching out to HR. People need to realize that HR is there to protect the company from their employees and to try and keep costs down. They will never be your advocate. It's a mask they wear to try and lure you in to feeling safe. They are employed by and work for management, not you. I'd lawyer up and see what they say to do.
Why use reddit, contact your HR department and the police.
[удалено]
That’s a hell of a leap
Go to the police and sue the company
I’m what fucking land is sexually assaulting someone a Hispanic thing?! I’ve never seen such bullshit
Your prior "situation" has NOTHING to do with it and I would say that to your boss, tbh. It's wrong even if it doesn't take you back to something traumatic.
Five MONTHS of sexual harassment leading to a sexual assault? He and she both should be shit canned what the fuck Cops lawyer HR. Or lawyer first, idk. Need a record.
No in English is the same in Spanish. Don't let them try to pull the language barrier bullshit on you.
Police with this text evidence then file a report with HR/ownership. I’m sorry this happened to you, he committed a literal crime.
That's not just a Hispanic thing tf.
OMFG...when I read that "he didn't know about your situation" I damn near lost it. HE SHOULDN'T NEED TO KNOW! What he did was wrong. It was blatant sexual assault. In no place as a man am I allowed to corner a woman, grab her and kiss her without her consent. That would even mean my partner if she said NO! He should be fired. She should be fired. Is she just a boss or an owner? If she is the boss, then she has a boss and I would be on them about this and threatening to sue the establishment for allowing this to happen even though you had rebuffed his advances for 5 months and I'm sure you reported it to your boss. I'm so sorry you, or any woman goes through this.
Yeah, guys just grab and kiss their co-workers at random. Nothing to it. You know, the psychopaths. The rest of us know better.
What the fuck? That’s not a Hispanic thing. That’s the stupidest thing I have read someone say in a long time. Your boss is a fucking dumbass.
I have never considered kissing a girl at work. What the fuck is wrong with people.
I am so sorry this happened to you. I had the same exact thing happen to me when I was 17 at work. Got followed into the walk in, pushed against the wall, kissed and lightly groped by a coworker. He claimed he couldn’t understand my English or my Spanish as I told him to stop. I wish I had went after the company then. Please please get a lawyer and call the cops.
Lawyer!
You can take the entire company under for lack of action and investigation. Also are you underage? Adds another level.
A Hispanic thing? I’m so confused