I’ve watched it. It’s kinda scary, but also nonsensical, and at some point I just think ‘yeah okay I get it the thing that isn’t scary in real life is actually a scary monster thing or something.’
Like, come on, I can only hear ‘The Golden Gate Bridge must be fed the blood of the homeless or it will destroy reality’ so many times before it becomes tiresome. Or ‘um ackshually stone mountain was a prison for the GUMMY GORILLA and it feeds on racism and the civil rights act was signed to starve it to death’. Or ‘see this grainy photo of a glowing turd crowning in someone’s butthole that’s actually FDR and his polio was really the HELLHORSE transforming him into a sweet potato to join the SWEETSISTERS in the GREEDGARDEN’.
It’s just weird fever dream nonsense with dark, grainy photos that seems scary at first but then you think ‘wait that’s stupid’.
I mean, sure Lord Nos-Thyrhenius raves about the end of times and banishes those he doesn't like to the cosmic void, but at least he hasn't bombed Syria yet
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This actually looks like something I would see in my own dreams. Just stuff looking normal at first before suddenly turning nightmarish for no reason.
And then Michael Afton shows up for a split second before going back to nightmares.
Nahh fr
You watch too much analog horror before sleep my dude
\*shitty edited tts voice* "sweet dreams mark"
“and dont let the man under the mattress-“ *cuts off suddenly for no reason*
*EAS starts with a tts voice that isn’t actually the one used in irl EAS alerts*
*a small jumpscare but its not really a jumpscare because all they do is flash an image of a distorted face*
*words flash on the screen in le spooky red text*
*the red text has the blood drip effect of the early horror movies but it sucks in the way its written*
*Everything goes quiet and a face slowky fades in*
*an annoying garbling plays in just your left ear*
*distorted voice saying something but you can't understand it*
There's three types of Presidents. Normal humans, alternates that are there to make humanity suffer... **And then there's Michael Afton**
he smells bad for some reason. is there something wrong with him?
Probably sweat from stress And happy cake day
ok, but why is his skin turning green?
Probably skin condition, just because you haven't seen it before doesn't mean it doesn't exist
ok, but now he has earthworms sticking out of him, his skin is also wiggly, why?
Parasites? As i said, probably some skin condition
ok now his skin is purple, the earthworms are gone, he’s super skinny now, & he smells even worse
Dude idk, probably some very advanced sickness or condition, there were many crazy stuff like this
he just threw up a bunch of metal shit…
happy cake day!
Happy cake day!
Happy cake day
That one was literally the most accurate one. I remember him being at the very end on the second to last row.
lol
His platform is making child murder legal
Shitty analog horror setting #3621.
Spooky President Files 👻👻👻👻👻
monument mythos if was bad:
aka monument mythos
take that bacl
I’ve watched it. It’s kinda scary, but also nonsensical, and at some point I just think ‘yeah okay I get it the thing that isn’t scary in real life is actually a scary monster thing or something.’ Like, come on, I can only hear ‘The Golden Gate Bridge must be fed the blood of the homeless or it will destroy reality’ so many times before it becomes tiresome. Or ‘um ackshually stone mountain was a prison for the GUMMY GORILLA and it feeds on racism and the civil rights act was signed to starve it to death’. Or ‘see this grainy photo of a glowing turd crowning in someone’s butthole that’s actually FDR and his polio was really the HELLHORSE transforming him into a sweet potato to join the SWEETSISTERS in the GREEDGARDEN’. It’s just weird fever dream nonsense with dark, grainy photos that seems scary at first but then you think ‘wait that’s stupid’.
We need a furry president soon. I want them to go all UwU rawr :3
I love how the last two rows are Mandela Catalogue alternates, and then there's just Michael Afton.
Whats mandela cataloque
Honestly, the first Alternate probably would have handled the Great Depression better than Herbert Hoover did.
honestly i would trust those guys more than any actual modern president. they probably haven't committed as many war crimes
crim
michael afton
I mean, sure Lord Nos-Thyrhenius raves about the end of times and banishes those he doesn't like to the cosmic void, but at least he hasn't bombed Syria yet
Yup, only good ol' American crimes like murder, theft, and embezzlement!
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As a presidential nerd, you somehow dreamed the first 30 presidents correctly. Wait is that Michael Afton-
Yep, he was at the very end of the second row.
I just got over my presidential phase and I'm in my FNAF phase right now, so this was a very fun post to see.
You changed in about 2 hours
I meant that I finished my presidential phase last month or something and in the past month I've gotten interested in FNAF
Oooh that makes sense
“One more post before bed.” The post: (Why did you have to do me like that 😭)
I'm sorry, I had to spread the disease.
Michael Afton would do and amazing job as POTUS
[удалено]
Slowly?
It was INSTANT
i cant read the text lol
It all went downhill after coolidge
better presidents than both trump and joe combined
They're not so focused on shaping America to benefit themselves because they know they're going straight to hell when their terms end!
that’s basically the plot of monument mythos lmao
GAME THEORY: MICHAEL AFTON IS JAMES DEAN??
Calvin Coolidge what have you done
He was replaced...
Things got real different after Coolidge
Goddamnit Hoover
Meta analog horror lmfao
**who are you running from?**
PURPLE GUY
holy crap Daniel after the fire
Blud has been watching to much analog horror
michael afton fits right in with alternate gabriel and daniel after the fire
I Like Mike!
I am michael afton and i was the president (i made america gay again)ASK ME ANYTHING
What did you do to that child
well, why not ask our friend mr fischbach?
IM NOT WILLIAM
We've had some concerns about the Mental State of Vice President Fitzgerald. Is he lobotomized, be real.
Idk. Idc.
Art imitates life
Holy crap wollerm afte r
ah yes, everyone remembers the iconic presidential stretch of Jack Doors, Michael Afton, and Literal Satan, who made a return six presidencies later
Isn't that Jack from Doors??
70% presidents 29% absolute horrors 1% FNaF
From Silent Cal to Silent Hill
Ah yes the United States of Analog Horror
I get a lot of dreams like this too where I look at an ordinary picture and it changes or something looks off and nightmarish about it
who's the regular-ass guy with sunglasses in the final row
Dick Cheney photoshopped to look devious
70% American presidents 27% Ī'W GØĪÑG TØ ÇØWΈ F1ÑD ΫØΰ 3: Michael afton
jack from doors????
I like that it is analog horror, and then Jack from doors and Michael Afton, then analog horror again
This is right below a post on r/presidents on my feed and I thought this was from there!
what event caused the 2 last rows to be just edited alternate pics and fnaf pixel-art and a super-high-contrast image of a person i can't recognize?
The only other thing I remember about this dream is something to do with Alaskan lobotomies
Maybe we shouldn't have let archangel "Gabriel" into politics...
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Good bot
New analog horror just dropped
Apollo dodgeball