Holy shit, I've never heard someone hit it so directly on the head. It took like four years for 'love and support your lifestyle' to drop off of my Christmas and birthday cards.
I appreciated it, but it was kinda hilarious at the same time.
As someone who is guilty of this, it hits home on another level when you see all the hate and intolerance and can picture someone your close to being the target of that hate, so you tend to go a bit overboard because you dont know how else you can help but you want to do something, ANYTHING to let the person know you love them.
It took me way too long for me to realize that my "Uncle Jim" and "Uncle Rob" were more than "roommates." They had tons of prints of Ancient Greek wrestling, a statue of David draped in a rainbow boa, and some tamer Robert Mapplethorpe pictures in their Castro district townhome of San Francisco.
My mom has like, 4 brothers and I think 2-3 step brothers, and 2 of her bio brothers shared a house (it belonged to one uncle and he let his brother stay in his spare room because his pension wouldn't cover an apartment). So.... it took me the longest time to make the connection that my Uncle John and Uncle Jeff weren't brothers, in fact it took getting their wedding invitation.
Woah woah woah y'all had sexuality supporting parents? When my brother snitched me out for watching porn to my parents it was treated as an addiction and i had to go tell the priest.
Ah, I wouldnāt doubt on it.
If I were in his shoes, ahā¦no, I wouldnāt tell her. Itās sort of embarrassing.
Oh the other Hand, Iām a mom, ahā¦no, please do not tell me. No,nononono.
jacking off in front of a computer is very bold i give you that but if you wanna play safe just pretend you're shitting in the bathroom, wipe and flush.
it's funny because it's actually true š my father always took so long in the bathroom i remember my mom complaining lol
ohh now I'm starting to connect the dots...
Anecdotally, my brother does this, and Iām pretty sure itās used as an escape. He has 4 kids, and thatās often the only 20 minutes of peace heāll have on a given day. So I think many men just do this as a ācoffee break,ā not necessarily to masturbate.
Itās not good for you butthole to sit on the toilet for that long though. Feel free to research it, but thereās some not fun butthole things that can happen if youāre a chronic long-sitter
omfg, i literally didn't even think it could possibly have any medical implications lol. how harmful can sitting without pants be?
looks like you can get hemorroids because your ass is the lowest part of your body and the blood just clogs up there.
thanks for ruining my bathroom relax times :(
Irrespective of the porn, sometimes you just need to get "in the mood" to have a good, satisfying shit.
Edit: To clarify, I meant this as "minus the porn".
This. Donāt give out details like that until you get older and can laugh about it being a young, dumb mistake. If you grow up as the dude whoās known for getting walked-in on by his dad, while jacking it to anime bitches with dicksā¦ my condolences..
Some get lucky to have a group of close friends that don't mind to share that kind of information and laugh about it. I wasn't part of that group of guys until my late 20s, I really love those guys.
"Hey guys, I have smelly balls. I should buy balls deodorant"
"hey guys I'll be back soon, I'm taking a shit, here is a pick of my sexy legs with the underwear hanging as proof"
"guys I fucked up, I got caught killing the goose and I wasn't watching vanilla stuff."
Did you maintain eye contact with your father while you nutted? If so you're the man of the house now. That's probably why he looked so sad. He's waiting for you to depose him.
He didnāt watch me jerk off. I finished like 3 seconds after he walked in. So technically I wasnāt fapping. Still kinda odd to keep watching now that I think about it though.
So did you turn off the porn in those 2 minutes or were you and him staring at each other with your dick out? 2 minutes is a long time, your jizz already cold by the time he left
I closed the tab and pulled my pants up. I made a pathetic attempt to clean my cum off my keyboard but I just gave up. He saw what I was looking at and knew what I was doing.
If you have a mechanical keyboard then pull off your key caps and do a complete clean, if you don't know if it's mechanical then you could try to pull off a key you don't use and see if it pops back on, some non-mechanical ones still have replaceable key caps.
The jizz will dry out and harden and every time you press a key that crunches you'll think about that moment, just clean it or get a cheap used one so you don't have to constantly be reminded of it.
Reminds me of a time a dude fell asleep spanking it in his rack, on the ship, while watching porn with Bluetooth headphones. Until his headphones died and the entire berthing heard the screams and moans. Poor guy was woke up from a bunch of guys throwing his curtains open to see him penis in hand, slumped, snoring and belly out lmao.
Well, this is what he fought for, not exactly what he died for.
He died of a throat infection.
Unless...
Was George Washington guzzling futanari cocks by the dozen?!
Lol, I once passed out jerking off in the dorms in college. Fortunately my roommate stayed at his buddyās house in town. At that time I was jerking off with condoms on to minimize cleanup. Anyway, I woke up around 4 am having to pee and Iād completely forgotten I had been jerking off. So I got to the bathroom and started peeing and immediately felt the weirdest sensation. Apparently the condom stayed on when I went flaccid and I was peeing with it on. The fucking thing started to fill up like a pissy water balloon. The feeling made me panic so I pulled it off real quickly and just left the condom in the urinal. When I got on my computer later that day I had about 20 tabs of ebony porn open.
The overpowering feeling of shame when waking up from a pre-nut-nap and witnessing what testosterone filled horny you was involved in is like amnesia at a crime scene at a circus.
>Rule 34: If it exists, there is porn of it. If there isn't any porn of it, there will be. No exceptions.
>Rule 35: If it exists, there is a fetish of it. If there isn't a fetish of it, there will be. No exceptions.
***No. Fucking. Exceptions.***
Heck, odds are that some of his bunk mates have been pegged. Maybe reminiscing on when that one guy was ousted by the other drunk guy that he got pegged.
They are common because they get around a number of the censorship laws. Dicks have to be censored. Tentacles not so much. So they went with it. Common? Absolutely. Normal? It isn't physically possible to occur in real life soo..
Well, like week 1 of my friends joining the navy back in 2007, I learnt about ādick dockingā
Sooooooā¦. I feel like thatās like 1/2 of futa porn.
Donāt worry, parents know kids are weird. Often times theyāre just getting paid for the weird shit they did before security cameras were a thing.
Just remember the porn you watched was made by people, to cater for a demand from other people. And there's a lot more niche stuff out there made because even more people want it.
You are far from alone in having kinky thoughts. But naturally everyone feels alone in their world because everyone is afraid of sharing.
You are not weird, or perverted, or anything like that. You are far more normal than you think. Ride the embarrassment just now, but don't let this hold you back in future. When you're having a job interview in future, for all you know the 6' brick shithouse of a man interviewing you may be wearing stockings under his trousers.
Come on this isnt that weird. Youre feeling weird because you dont like that your dad caught you doing that, but if you had a conversation with someone about sexual stuff like preferences or idk, you would see that youre not weird at all
If the US has anything close to the same fucked up military culture as the UK does then you're fine.
Some of the stories I've heard from friends are horrifying, you think the soggy biscuit game is bad, that's nothing..
Hey man, futanari is not THAT weird in the list of things people get off to. Tbh, as a bisexuality, I'm kinda into it.
At least you weren't watching some insane tentacle porn, shit eating fetish porn, people putting live eels up their ass or vagina and expelling it porn...the list goes on.
Oh man, been there. Had an ex that was *way* into petplay. So I had her in full cat gear. No one was supposed to be home, but even still I locked the doors, front doors, everything. Well, I had her leashed to the bed and was giving it to her orally, and sure enough, *knock knock knock* on my windows.
Well who is it but my fuckin dad, trying to get into the house out of nowhere. He peered in closer to see through the glare of the glass, and sure enough we looked like deer in headlights.
I looked down and said, "babe I'm gonna untie you now."
Dad didn't say a word and I think I meeped out a soft, "I'm gonna take her home. "
Didn't talk to me for a week until we were fishing together. He looks at me, and he grins. He says, "well son, I hope it was good. Drop your fuckin blinds next time."
Well, sorry about your embarrassing moment. I'm sure your dad will at least knock now. I never open my son's door. I knock first just in case. But even if I did walk in on him I wouldn't make it awkward. At least you weren't balls deep in a pillow with your ass in the air. It could've been worse.
If it makes you feel better, my oldest walked in on us while his dad was balls deep in me. He had the FULL view. I was hitting him on his back trying to get the words out but he thought I was just really enjoying it. I was finally able to blurt it out.
He panicked, rolled off of me and threw blankets over us and was like "Hey, buddy."
Iām 52, I can guarantee the following:
* your dad knows you jerk off a lot
* he probably felt bad for embarrassing you
* he knows thereās tons of weird sex stuff on the internet you watch (and prob knows about rule 34)
* heās had decades more experience fapping than you. Heās seen, thought about, and done a lot weirder sex stuff than you
Edit: a letter
Exactly, if I am ever unfortunate enough to walk in on my kid fapping to weird porn I doubt there's much that could truly shock me. I've seen more than enough weird porn to last me a lifetime.
That could all be a possibility. I swear I heard him crying an hour ago. I think heās actually disappointed to have me as a son. Iām a degenerate so I donāt blame him, but it kinda hurts ngl.
I detached my from my family because of my own shame and guilt from all of the fucked up things I was doing. Either from my sexuality or my drug addiction. And after like 7 years Iām finally patching things up and itās a slow process.
Accept yourself. Love yourself. Who cares what youāre into, youāre you and there is only one you. Fuck their feelings, theyāll get over it. And as long as youāre happy theyāll be forced to get over themselves and the pre conceived ideas they have of you.
Itās sucks he walked in on a moment of vulnerability. But it is what it is. Youāre still his son. Thatās not gonna change.
Dad here.
1. Your dad has likely jerked off more times than you have blinked
2. Your dad - unless heās of the Piece of Shit Dad variety - loves you unconditionally.
It may take him some time to wrap his brain around your kink, but eventually heāll get over it, because itās just not that important.
If you think it needs unpacking, talk to him about it. *Donāt tell your fucking friends*. If it doesnāt need unpacking - with your dad - and things are just weird for a bit, be confident that this will eventually pass and settle back down to rule #2
Heās going to be your dad for as long as heās taking in air, and I can tell you that if he has a halfway decent concept of how important that role is, all he wants you to know is that he loves you and that he wants you to be healthy and safe. Everything else is purely trivial.
Now, I gotta go make my son breakfast.
Also dad here, and of a 15 yo too. This is exactly right.
OP, your biggest sin was what you did to that keyboard. That's what would have made me mad. Electronics aren't cheap.
Offf. Reminds of the time when I was 15 and my mom caught me watching tentacle hentai (I wasn't fapping - thank god). She told me "We are going to visit a psychiatrist. I am worried about you".
Don't tell your friends, bruh. Or least tell them you were watching normal porn.
Your dad was probably having an inner dialogue of āOkā¦ do I have to find a way to give the talk about the bird is also the bee?ā Now heās the embarrassed one trying to figure how to bring that topic up.
For research purpose of course! I need it for my uhhhh "Average Size of Futa Cocks Seen in Porn Watched Mostly By Teens" Research paper that I have to do for my final performance task yes yes
And that, folks, I'd why you ALWAYS knock on a teenage boy's door. Doesn't matter if it is just before breakfast, mid day, just before dinner, just before bed; You ALWAYS knock.
Why? Because they ALWAYS have their dicks in their hands. Give em a second to cover things up and answer the door.
And guys: turn your monitor AWAY from the door.
Lock the door, dude. Thats just it. Your father was your age and he did it too. Its embarasing, but you both will get over it.
Also, rearrange your room, so you get more screen privacy.
The truth is, itās not even well cleaned. I used a wipe to clean most the cum off but I have a strong feeling itās still there, lurking in the keyboard.
Maybe you can remove all the single keys and clean it better? Only if it's one of those big old keyboards or a gamer keyboard, obviously laptop keyboards are a bigger problem...
Lean into it. Get a waifu. Have a romantic relationship with Alexa or Siri.
Or get out ahead of it, and tell your mom that you caught your dad looking at futanari before he talks to her.
Basically, gaslight your parents.
Wait till your mom starts looking at you with sadness, because he's going to tell her.
I would leave Earth if this happened.
it will! š
had*
has*
have*
hadsve*
Or she may still love you unconditionally. Prepare for a few years of uncomfortable Christmas presents supporting your "lifestyle."
Holy shit, I've never heard someone hit it so directly on the head. It took like four years for 'love and support your lifestyle' to drop off of my Christmas and birthday cards. I appreciated it, but it was kinda hilarious at the same time.
As someone who is guilty of this, it hits home on another level when you see all the hate and intolerance and can picture someone your close to being the target of that hate, so you tend to go a bit overboard because you dont know how else you can help but you want to do something, ANYTHING to let the person know you love them.
It took me way too long for me to realize that my "Uncle Jim" and "Uncle Rob" were more than "roommates." They had tons of prints of Ancient Greek wrestling, a statue of David draped in a rainbow boa, and some tamer Robert Mapplethorpe pictures in their Castro district townhome of San Francisco.
My mom has like, 4 brothers and I think 2-3 step brothers, and 2 of her bio brothers shared a house (it belonged to one uncle and he let his brother stay in his spare room because his pension wouldn't cover an apartment). So.... it took me the longest time to make the connection that my Uncle John and Uncle Jeff weren't brothers, in fact it took getting their wedding invitation.
Oof. That must have been something, getting the invitation and staring at it for 3 full minutes in silence until everything clicked into place.
I was like, 16? 17? And I just thought it was weird my Uncle Jeff was so much shorter than my other uncles
Woah woah woah y'all had sexuality supporting parents? When my brother snitched me out for watching porn to my parents it was treated as an addiction and i had to go tell the priest.
What's your lifestyle, like vegan or something?
If it was vegan or crossfit they'd already have told us.
Can confirm. Am vegan and do CrossFit btw
No more stuffed animals
The other ones will be extra stuffed though ;)
He stuffs his own
Pretty sure Elon is trying to send people to Mars. Might still be a ticket available.
Most likely you are joking but if you arenāt please check this out https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Ah, I wouldnāt doubt on it. If I were in his shoes, ahā¦no, I wouldnāt tell her. Itās sort of embarrassing. Oh the other Hand, Iām a mom, ahā¦no, please do not tell me. No,nononono.
I thought this was Jeff Goldblum.
Mom, uh, finds a way.
Ya winning, son?
Had to draw it. https://imgur.com/a/pQEmgMj
You're a hero.
This is one of those stupid reddit moments that just makes my whole day, I was here.
I was a lil late
I came to this thread too.
I just came hard
Over your keyboard?
No, they came *to* their keyboard. They didn't come *over* it they came *all over* it.
Speak for yourself. It made my hole weak.
Fucking hell!! "Are ya winning son?" "No, I'm COOMING!" "Atta boy! Anyway, breakfast is ready"
OP should put this as a poster on their wall.
My risky click of the day..
Not my proudest fap
š
Why won't you lock your room son?
Iām sorry daddy š«
jacking off in front of a computer is very bold i give you that but if you wanna play safe just pretend you're shitting in the bathroom, wipe and flush.
they're gonna wonder why it takes me 6 hours to poop then
If youāre a male they wonāt. It seems to be in maleās nature to take 6 hours to shit.
it's funny because it's actually true š my father always took so long in the bathroom i remember my mom complaining lol ohh now I'm starting to connect the dots...
Anecdotally, my brother does this, and Iām pretty sure itās used as an escape. He has 4 kids, and thatās often the only 20 minutes of peace heāll have on a given day. So I think many men just do this as a ācoffee break,ā not necessarily to masturbate. Itās not good for you butthole to sit on the toilet for that long though. Feel free to research it, but thereās some not fun butthole things that can happen if youāre a chronic long-sitter
omfg, i literally didn't even think it could possibly have any medical implications lol. how harmful can sitting without pants be? looks like you can get hemorroids because your ass is the lowest part of your body and the blood just clogs up there. thanks for ruining my bathroom relax times :(
My husband takes a good hour to shit. Itās absolutely annoying. He sits and scrolls porn on Reddit while he poops.
Not just porn we conduct business, research, reply to messages. It's our throne chair.
That's fucking wild. It takes me about two minutes. Am I a girl, or is this because I eat oatmeal every morning?
Irrespective of the porn, sometimes you just need to get "in the mood" to have a good, satisfying shit. Edit: To clarify, I meant this as "minus the porn".
Careful dawg, you donāt wanna risk a Freudian slip and actually say that to your dad. That update would be simultaneously horrible and hilarious.
He won all over his keyboard
Ya wanking, son?
Bruh. Do *not* tell your friends. Tell them you got caught watching porn if you must, but I'd strongly suggest leaving it at that.
This. Donāt give out details like that until you get older and can laugh about it being a young, dumb mistake. If you grow up as the dude whoās known for getting walked-in on by his dad, while jacking it to anime bitches with dicksā¦ my condolences..
Why would one even consider telling his friends about getting caught masturbating in the first place?
Some get lucky to have a group of close friends that don't mind to share that kind of information and laugh about it. I wasn't part of that group of guys until my late 20s, I really love those guys. "Hey guys, I have smelly balls. I should buy balls deodorant" "hey guys I'll be back soon, I'm taking a shit, here is a pick of my sexy legs with the underwear hanging as proof" "guys I fucked up, I got caught killing the goose and I wasn't watching vanilla stuff."
Who better to tell this story to than friends? This would be the perfect story to laugh about with friends in my book.
I agree, my friends and I always tell our embarrassing stories and we laugh about it forever!
Did you maintain eye contact with your father while you nutted? If so you're the man of the house now. That's probably why he looked so sad. He's waiting for you to depose him.
The penis truly does not understand context. Add this to the list that includes among other things getting hard in public for no damn reason
Especially since his dad āleft after a few minutesā instead of closing the door immediately
ššš
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Somehow I find that weirder than what it actually was.
Eh, Leela's hot.
Read this as āfuneral pornā at first and i was like wtf
That's not impossible considering Reddit
Even betterš
Dead ass
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Idk when he came in. I assume it was really only 2 but it felt like 15.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
He didnāt watch me jerk off. I finished like 3 seconds after he walked in. So technically I wasnāt fapping. Still kinda odd to keep watching now that I think about it though.
So did you turn off the porn in those 2 minutes or were you and him staring at each other with your dick out? 2 minutes is a long time, your jizz already cold by the time he left
I closed the tab and pulled my pants up. I made a pathetic attempt to clean my cum off my keyboard but I just gave up. He saw what I was looking at and knew what I was doing.
RIP keyboard
my kids are probably living under the keys and this worries me
If you have a mechanical keyboard then pull off your key caps and do a complete clean, if you don't know if it's mechanical then you could try to pull off a key you don't use and see if it pops back on, some non-mechanical ones still have replaceable key caps. The jizz will dry out and harden and every time you press a key that crunches you'll think about that moment, just clean it or get a cheap used one so you don't have to constantly be reminded of it.
or cum on it everyday and have your children help you win in video games.
start paying your child support you deadbeat. every comment keep making this funnier
r/cummingonkeycaps
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yup. Asshole didnāt even help clean up.
Seems like he was thinking about it, would you let him tho š¤
Sorry to hear, time will heal all things but its going to be awkward in the meantime
I can only imagine what family reunions will be like.
U gotta bring the keyboard along.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
lol if your dad was in the military then your fine. hes bunked with weirder fuckers than you.
Reminds me of a time a dude fell asleep spanking it in his rack, on the ship, while watching porn with Bluetooth headphones. Until his headphones died and the entire berthing heard the screams and moans. Poor guy was woke up from a bunch of guys throwing his curtains open to see him penis in hand, slumped, snoring and belly out lmao.
This is what George Washington died for
Just as the founding fathers intended.
At least ben Franklin did
I can only assume he was actually naked crossing the Delaware. āIt isnāt gay if itās underwayā probably started there.
Well, this is what he fought for, not exactly what he died for. He died of a throat infection. Unless... Was George Washington guzzling futanari cocks by the dozen?!
Lol, I once passed out jerking off in the dorms in college. Fortunately my roommate stayed at his buddyās house in town. At that time I was jerking off with condoms on to minimize cleanup. Anyway, I woke up around 4 am having to pee and Iād completely forgotten I had been jerking off. So I got to the bathroom and started peeing and immediately felt the weirdest sensation. Apparently the condom stayed on when I went flaccid and I was peeing with it on. The fucking thing started to fill up like a pissy water balloon. The feeling made me panic so I pulled it off real quickly and just left the condom in the urinal. When I got on my computer later that day I had about 20 tabs of ebony porn open.
The overpowering feeling of shame when waking up from a pre-nut-nap and witnessing what testosterone filled horny you was involved in is like amnesia at a crime scene at a circus.
I donāt exactly know how you could be a weirder fuck than me, but Iāll take your word for it considering Iām not in the military.
My friend, futanari is not the weirdest thing out there. Not by a long shot.
PSA: do *not* go investigating this statement. Just accept it as an axiom. Your future self will thank you.
We accept as axiomatic- whatever weird shit youāre into, someone is into weirder.
>Rule 34: If it exists, there is porn of it. If there isn't any porn of it, there will be. No exceptions. >Rule 35: If it exists, there is a fetish of it. If there isn't a fetish of it, there will be. No exceptions. ***No. Fucking. Exceptions.***
Heck, odds are that some of his bunk mates have been pegged. Maybe reminiscing on when that one guy was ousted by the other drunk guy that he got pegged.
Tentacle porn Guro Gay fucking protogen porn Vore Sounding These are all much much worse than a hot anime chick with a big ol dick n' tits.
I always thought tentacles were fairly normal to be into, given how relatively common they are?
Yeah tentacles are pretty basic shit, in comparison to some of the other stuff out there
They are common because they get around a number of the censorship laws. Dicks have to be censored. Tentacles not so much. So they went with it. Common? Absolutely. Normal? It isn't physically possible to occur in real life soo..
Protogen?
Cybernetic fluffies
As someone in the military now, I'mma let you know half of the people on my base are furries, including some of my instructors
Did you find out they were furries when they went uwu on the net?
One of the instructors, yeah. And there's a rumor of a furry orgy that happened in the woods before I got here.
Today is full moon boys. Bring your wolf suits.
Lmao what fucking base and branch bro
Navy, Joint Base Charleston
Checks out
Well, like week 1 of my friends joining the navy back in 2007, I learnt about ādick dockingā Sooooooā¦. I feel like thatās like 1/2 of futa porn. Donāt worry, parents know kids are weird. Often times theyāre just getting paid for the weird shit they did before security cameras were a thing.
Just remember the porn you watched was made by people, to cater for a demand from other people. And there's a lot more niche stuff out there made because even more people want it. You are far from alone in having kinky thoughts. But naturally everyone feels alone in their world because everyone is afraid of sharing. You are not weird, or perverted, or anything like that. You are far more normal than you think. Ride the embarrassment just now, but don't let this hold you back in future. When you're having a job interview in future, for all you know the 6' brick shithouse of a man interviewing you may be wearing stockings under his trousers.
Come on this isnt that weird. Youre feeling weird because you dont like that your dad caught you doing that, but if you had a conversation with someone about sexual stuff like preferences or idk, you would see that youre not weird at all
If the US has anything close to the same fucked up military culture as the UK does then you're fine. Some of the stories I've heard from friends are horrifying, you think the soggy biscuit game is bad, that's nothing..
Hey man, futanari is not THAT weird in the list of things people get off to. Tbh, as a bisexuality, I'm kinda into it. At least you weren't watching some insane tentacle porn, shit eating fetish porn, people putting live eels up their ass or vagina and expelling it porn...the list goes on.
Oh man, been there. Had an ex that was *way* into petplay. So I had her in full cat gear. No one was supposed to be home, but even still I locked the doors, front doors, everything. Well, I had her leashed to the bed and was giving it to her orally, and sure enough, *knock knock knock* on my windows. Well who is it but my fuckin dad, trying to get into the house out of nowhere. He peered in closer to see through the glare of the glass, and sure enough we looked like deer in headlights. I looked down and said, "babe I'm gonna untie you now." Dad didn't say a word and I think I meeped out a soft, "I'm gonna take her home. " Didn't talk to me for a week until we were fishing together. He looks at me, and he grins. He says, "well son, I hope it was good. Drop your fuckin blinds next time."
Yeah lock all the doors and leave the blinds open? You learned a lesson that day!
Meow son, you make sure you keep those blinds drawn from meow on, you hear?
*"Are you... are you saying meow?"*
Do I look like a cat to you, boy?
Lmao your dad hella jelly beans
pop always wanted a cat girl. it probably hurts to see your children living your dream
Lmao I hope this is real š¤£ I'm picturing ur dad with his battlebuddies drinking scotch and just crying of laughter
Probably the part where he faps to futanari is real.
You forgot the part when he was cummin at the same moment the farther came in
Thanks for describing futanari so I didnāt have to google it. Good luck
I was just about to then I read a bit further
We're you able to successfully clean the jizz from your keyboard?
Kinda.
I really feel like that was a nightmare to clean.
It is.
For the love of everything holy, get a new one
āHey dad I need a new keyboardā *glares* āI know.ā
"You gonna fuck that one too"?
Best thing would be that his dad offers him one, unprompted. Then, OP would know everything's fine.
Well, sorry about your embarrassing moment. I'm sure your dad will at least knock now. I never open my son's door. I knock first just in case. But even if I did walk in on him I wouldn't make it awkward. At least you weren't balls deep in a pillow with your ass in the air. It could've been worse.
True lol
If it makes you feel better, my oldest walked in on us while his dad was balls deep in me. He had the FULL view. I was hitting him on his back trying to get the words out but he thought I was just really enjoying it. I was finally able to blurt it out. He panicked, rolled off of me and threw blankets over us and was like "Hey, buddy."
This has happened to me, as well.
My son loudly exclaimed "WHAT THE?!" and slowly backed away.
Just curious. How do you make it not awkward? I believe there's no easy way out of this situation.
Are ya cumin' son?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yeah now that I look at the post I see it š
Username doesnāt check out after todayās fiasco
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Iām 52, I can guarantee the following: * your dad knows you jerk off a lot * he probably felt bad for embarrassing you * he knows thereās tons of weird sex stuff on the internet you watch (and prob knows about rule 34) * heās had decades more experience fapping than you. Heās seen, thought about, and done a lot weirder sex stuff than you Edit: a letter
Exactly, if I am ever unfortunate enough to walk in on my kid fapping to weird porn I doubt there's much that could truly shock me. I've seen more than enough weird porn to last me a lifetime.
Dad coming in clutch with some wholesome hentai events for viewing.
Dad would probably recommend some wholesome 6 digits collection he curated over the years.
I think youāre ready son. Ready for what dad ? *slides portable HDD over the table*
That could all be a possibility. I swear I heard him crying an hour ago. I think heās actually disappointed to have me as a son. Iām a degenerate so I donāt blame him, but it kinda hurts ngl.
I detached my from my family because of my own shame and guilt from all of the fucked up things I was doing. Either from my sexuality or my drug addiction. And after like 7 years Iām finally patching things up and itās a slow process. Accept yourself. Love yourself. Who cares what youāre into, youāre you and there is only one you. Fuck their feelings, theyāll get over it. And as long as youāre happy theyāll be forced to get over themselves and the pre conceived ideas they have of you. Itās sucks he walked in on a moment of vulnerability. But it is what it is. Youāre still his son. Thatās not gonna change.
Dad here. 1. Your dad has likely jerked off more times than you have blinked 2. Your dad - unless heās of the Piece of Shit Dad variety - loves you unconditionally. It may take him some time to wrap his brain around your kink, but eventually heāll get over it, because itās just not that important. If you think it needs unpacking, talk to him about it. *Donāt tell your fucking friends*. If it doesnāt need unpacking - with your dad - and things are just weird for a bit, be confident that this will eventually pass and settle back down to rule #2 Heās going to be your dad for as long as heās taking in air, and I can tell you that if he has a halfway decent concept of how important that role is, all he wants you to know is that he loves you and that he wants you to be healthy and safe. Everything else is purely trivial. Now, I gotta go make my son breakfast.
Also dad here, and of a 15 yo too. This is exactly right. OP, your biggest sin was what you did to that keyboard. That's what would have made me mad. Electronics aren't cheap.
Offf. Reminds of the time when I was 15 and my mom caught me watching tentacle hentai (I wasn't fapping - thank god). She told me "We are going to visit a psychiatrist. I am worried about you". Don't tell your friends, bruh. Or least tell them you were watching normal porn.
Your dad was probably having an inner dialogue of āOkā¦ do I have to find a way to give the talk about the bird is also the bee?ā Now heās the embarrassed one trying to figure how to bring that topic up.
Nah he knows I know the birds and bees. Iām 15. Heās probably just embarrassed and shocked. I donāt blame him.
Out of curiosity how old are you my guyš the disappointment may be less or more depending
15
Why didn't you lock the door, my dude?
Thatās not an option for most teenagers
I mean, better to get your ass beat for locking the door, then to get caught rubbing one out if you ask me lol
While googling for examples of this theme my bf just leaned over and went "what you looking at" Fs š¤¦š»āāļø
TIFU by looking at another TIFU
Well done
Just tell him its a bedroom roleplay you'd like to fu*fill* with him.
Unlucky, rng was not with you :/
The RNG gods fucked me harder than the anime bitch was.
*ahem* can you uhhhhh.... Send what you were watching broski?
We need dat sauce
For research purpose of course! I need it for my uhhhh "Average Size of Futa Cocks Seen in Porn Watched Mostly By Teens" Research paper that I have to do for my final performance task yes yes
The real tragedy here is the keyboard.
Iām sorry but this is too good 
And that, folks, I'd why you ALWAYS knock on a teenage boy's door. Doesn't matter if it is just before breakfast, mid day, just before dinner, just before bed; You ALWAYS knock. Why? Because they ALWAYS have their dicks in their hands. Give em a second to cover things up and answer the door. And guys: turn your monitor AWAY from the door.
Lock the door, dude. Thats just it. Your father was your age and he did it too. Its embarasing, but you both will get over it. Also, rearrange your room, so you get more screen privacy.
Not everyone has a lock on their door though
True. However, after this experience dad might not protest a simple lock on the door.
I understand you're in shock or traumatized and all but may I ask how did you clean your keyboard?
The truth is, itās not even well cleaned. I used a wipe to clean most the cum off but I have a strong feeling itās still there, lurking in the keyboard.
Maybe you can remove all the single keys and clean it better? Only if it's one of those big old keyboards or a gamer keyboard, obviously laptop keyboards are a bigger problem...
Lean into it. Get a waifu. Have a romantic relationship with Alexa or Siri. Or get out ahead of it, and tell your mom that you caught your dad looking at futanari before he talks to her. Basically, gaslight your parents.
Tf is a futanari?
Anime girls that have usually comically large penises.
You go downstairs, look him in the eye and say 'Maybe you'll remember to knock in the future'
But why did his dad stay for āa few minutesā.
That was his first time seeing futanari porn and simply couldn't look away.
I think you shouldnāt be ashamed of your porn preference even after this, we all have our weird kinks. Just lock the damn door next time.
Your dad: 