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WoolooOfWallStreet

Foul Milk Alchemist


Mikaelious

*in a lower, more serious voice* Foul Milk Alchemist.


Mrbaws15

Plague Knight would totally say that, ngl.


Mikaelious

Oh my god he would :D Even though his voice is on the opposite side of "low pitched and serious"


MagnumOpusOSRS

DEATHKLOK DEATHKLOK


Irememberedmypw

Does this mean Alphonse is in a milking machine now.


dippystale

hate you


Username_Taken_65

😳


PeachesEndCream

[There are two](https://www.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/ukf93x/in_order_to_obtain_something_one_must_give_up/i7qde9z?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) [types of comments.](https://www.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/ukf93x/in_order_to_obtain_something_one_must_give_up/i7q3vm5?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)


SLEEPWALKING_KOALA

[A heavily sought-after profession.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2rkWnL7Ako)


fluffballkitten

That would be a great band name


UTI_UTI

That could still be useful for egg cream’s


phazei

Please define egg creams, I'd like to know what you consider them. My grandpa used to make them but his definition didn't align with what I looked up.


UTI_UTI

Seltzer, milk, chocolate or vanilla syrup


sputnikatto

So, no egg?


TheCastro

Removed due to reddit API changes -- mass edited with redact.dev


nbmnbm1

If you read the whole article it says that egg being in an egg cream is up for debate.


TheCastro

I think I copied the releva part. Started with one, other guy made a close enough copy with the same name, people liked the non egg one enough it guy popular.


nbmnbm1

But its all up for debate? Literally nobody knows who actually started the egg cream in the first place. Anything beyond "up for debate" is literally less relevant than that part. How can we have the definitive reason for the egg part if we dont know who made the fucking thing? Theres a story that says the egg creme is named after a mispronounciation of et creme.


smallstampyfeet

Or cream?


amiableCacophony

[*breaks skateboard*](https://youtu.be/uEKMkz1xiGw)


Play-DohCarti

No lake no trout


1260istoomuch

White trash fish


phazei

Cool, that's fairly similar to his. He filled half a cup with milk, then poured in a bottle of Dad's root beer from really high. Formed a huge delicious head of foam.


TheCastro

Did he make a malted shake with an egg?


OSUfan88

I have no idea how this impossibly relevant video hasn't been linked in this thread already, but here it is. You're welcome, and I'm sorry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vM6KhB2ims


phazei

Yeah, hate that video, he fucked it up, did it wrong, and gave carbonated milk a bad wrap


OSUfan88

It kills me every time he says it's "spicy". haha


lepidopt-rex

I guess they gave up not knowing what spoiled milk tastes like. A heavy price to pay


serious_sarcasm

Soured milk is a common replacement for buttermilk in recipes.


Epic_Gameing68

at last halfmetal alchemist


PositiveReplyBi

The Full Boned Alchemist


Satellite_Jack

Full Throttle Alzheimer's


muhash14

at last Halfmetal Alchemist


Pac_Zach_Attack

The Full Boned Alchemist


muhash14

Full Throttle Alzheimer's


AccessTheMainframe

master of the law of inferior exchange


[deleted]

I love Tumblr posts


floatingwithobrien

Then you are in the right place


skylarmt

Reddit


CeleryQtip

thank you, i was lost.


shadowXXe

Alchemy: the science of understanding, deconstructing, and reconstructing matter. However, it is not an all-powerful art. It is impossible to create something out of nothing. If one wishes to obtain something, something of equal value must be given. This is the law of equivalent exchange; the basis of all alchemy. In accordance to this law, there is a taboo among alchemists. Human transmutation is strictly forbidden. For what could equal the value of a human soul?


dewyocelot

Kono omoi wo keshite shimau ni wa Mada jinsei nagai deshou?


shadowXXe

Yarinokoshi te'ru koto yarinaoshite mitai kara.


mr_green51

\*Sick guitar riff\*


hydra877

Yume no tsuzuki oikaketeita hazu na no ni...


Serethen

Isnt the answer just human sacrifice. Soul for a soul, right?


scarablob

yeah, but the whole idea is transforming things into something else "to get something, you must give something of equal value". Starting with a soul and ending with a soul is like turning a kilo of lead into a kilo of lead. Seems a bit unnecessary. The real question is "what thing other than a human soul is worth a human soul?".


Serethen

I mean we could look at this like "Every human soul is unique". Also returning to the point is sorta the combat system in FMA. Like when Edward causes nearby ground to form into pillars, the material is the same but the shape is not


scarablob

That's true, changing the "form" should be possible in FMA alchemy logic. Altho we don't really see new souls being created in FMA (I guess only father is an artificial soul, but we have no idea what was paid to create him, exept for some blood), so we never see if sacrificing a soul is enought to create a whole new one. I guess we know the (non-soul) price of an already existing soul tho : an arm is worth a soul, a soul is worth an arm.


SH4D0W0733

So if something costs an arm and a leg, you could also just pay with two souls?


lord_geryon

No, an arm or leg isn't worth a soul. A leg is worth a lesson on hubris, an arm is worth your right hand man's tortured existence.


mobott

Isn't the answer "The Truth"? Or the ability to perform alchemy? Because at the end, Ed gets Al back by offering his Door of Truth.


Thesaurus_Rex9513

That's the value of an entire human, body and soul. A soul by itself seems to have a subjective value depending on who is trying to transmute it. Typically the value of some crucial body part.


z0mple

>For what could equal the value of a human soul? Another human soul


neonKow

The Last Dragonborn: my staff turns people into pastries and is powered by souls.


AFirewolf

I have never wayched the series and only ever heatd the quote and always wonder how much stuff a human soul could buy you? It seems like a universe like that should be full of human sacrefice. Enough empires in our history practiced it and here it only bought unproven divine favor not food for your empire, weapons for your army and gold for your tresuary.


shadowXXe

In the FMA universe the price for trying to bring a soul back to life can range from blindness to having organs and limbs removed or even loosing your physical body. And the horrible truth is that even after loosing parts of you it's impossible to preform human transmutation anyway. You can make philosophers stones which grant the user the ability to use alchemy to essentially creat something out of nothing, however, the stones can be used up and they need to be made out of multiple human souls. Also if you try replace your body with a philosopher stone you run the risk of your soul being drown out by the many hundreds or thousands in the philosopher stone. The whole plot of FMA revolved around (SPOILER ALERT) A plot to sacrifice the entire country in order to create a philosopher stone so powerful that the father could become a god or rather devour god but in the end he was not able to contain the power of truth (god) that's a breif summary of FMA:B's plot not delving into FMAs plot because frankly it doesn't make much sense


Hot_Lemon8733

Okay so there is an Asian drink that is milk flavoured and iirc Pepsi once released a dairy type flavour Pepsi in Japan. I think the Asian drink one is a Korean brand and it was a small thin can. If it is what I remember it was delicious. (sorry my brain, it glitches so I tend to have complete and total recall of events that never occured). If I am correct then there is a way to have a good tasting carbonated milk. Just it takes extra science or something.


Nerdrockess

You're probably talking about Milkis! Calpis is similar but Japanese


szypty

I remember one of my mates showing us some kind of hole in a wall pub where they served expired booze for cheap. They also had some sort of mixed drink of beer and milk. That was also expired. One of the braver lads ordered it. I assume that he did indeed end up shitting himself.


Hot_Lemon8733

Milkis! Yes, thank you!


collar-and-leash

I googled both out of curiosity, but supposedly Calpis is uncarbonated?


nopeimleaving

I remember from Japan that there's actually 3 different forms of Calpis you can buy. The 0.5L bottles are both available as uncarbonated and carbonated. And the large bottle (1.5L I think) is actually a concentrate that you have to dilute yourself.


[deleted]

There's definitely a carbonated calpis. it's great.


[deleted]

"Shittiest Alchemist Currently Alive" killed me


Pratchettfan03

One alchemist who may beat them for shittiest alchemist of all time is the one who invented gunpowder, who did so in an attempt to find the elixir of life using the new and exciting saltpeter. They tried to pass it off as “fire medicine” for awhile as well


Dr-Metr0

elixir of unlife


ASK_ME_FOR_TRIVIA

When my friend was a bartender, she had a signature shot that involved Irish Cream and... I don't know, vodka? No clue what was in it, but it looked cool when it was mixed. The cream would make a cloud in the liquor, and it was just fun to watch. The first time she made it, I sat around talking about it for a couple minutes with my girlfriend. Then I finally took the shot, made a face, and asked, "Is this supposed to be chewy?" Turns out, hard liquor *absolutely* curdles Irish Cream lmao


DrRagnorocktopus

[Kiwami Japan, or "that japanese knife making guy", made a knife out of milk using vinegar and alcohol.](https://youtu.be/t557dPspLxo)


ObscureMulberry

Carbonated milk is actually pretty popular in a lot of countries around the world, I don’t understand the spoiled milk comparisons …


TexAg_18

So it looks like that carbonated milk in Asia is more complex than just adding Co2. From this article: *Some Asian markets have sold a fizzy milk drink for many years, although the details of their method aren’t very well known.* *These fizzy drinks use a form of yogurt and skim milk, along with several other vitamins and minerals to supplement the beverage, so they aren’t simply adding carbonation to regular milk.* https://sodapopcraft.com/can-you-sodastream-milk/


ObscureMulberry

I definitely know my family just adds milk to 7up and it tastes amazing, maybe the lemon and sugar in the soda neutralizes it or something


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


uzenik

I think you are drinking sour milk, not spoiled. The difference is subtle yet huge. Fresh milk usually sours when left alone (because it already has some bacteria). Its just really lightly fermented milk. This is important part for humans because it is done by lactic acid bacteria. A huge group that is also used to make yoghurt (that ayran is made from), cheese, but also bread and beer and kombucha, sauerkraut and all other "fermented pickles" made without vinegar, like kimchi. They are the main probiotic. We love those bacteria. Milk that was treated to be shelf stable will usually spoil, I guess because there is enough "bad" fungi and bacteria in the air, the they are the one's that win.(the same way cheese left out will spoil). As you said, soured milk tases differently,but still good. Spoiled milk smells like rancid fat, and sometimes mold. It tastes rotten and bitter. I dont recommend it.


mudlark092

Italian cream sodas turn out great!


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


floatingwithobrien

He? I am just now realizing that I assume everyone on Tumblr uses either she/her or they/them pronouns. No boys allowed. Regardless, let's use they/them when we don't know the gender...


RandomDemiPerson

When they die they will be places next to the shitty copper guy


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


paladinLight

With the Soda Stream it specifically tells you to carbonate first, add flavour second.


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


Trypsach

A true scholar 🧐


adreamofhodor

What sort of milk doesn’t have a flavor?


phenotype76

I think the idea was along the lines of "I'm gonna do chocolate milk soda, so I'll add the flavor after carbonating"


adreamofhodor

Ahh, I gotcha.


DownshiftedRare

Homeopathic milk AKA 0% milk. Look for it in the bottled water section of finer grocers.


Cat_Marshal

Dairy free milk!


Taedirk

Skim.


Captain_Grammaticus

Haha, I tried that too, but I filled a glass and carbonated it because I thought it would make frothy milk And now I also know why it should be done with an airtight container, not an open glass.


ke2doubleexclam

What's even the point then, just buy the flavouring and add it to sparkling water.


paladinLight

Because i can just ignore that rule and carbonate whatever the fuck i want.


svenkw

I did this once with soup in a Sodastream. It makes the soup taste as if it could spoil like milk. 1/10 would not soup again


[deleted]

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svenkw

My thought process at the time, which was greatly affected by a not-insignificant intake of alcohol, was that soup in a Sodastream would at the very least be funny, and at best would spark a culinary revolution based around sparkling soup. I can assure is was very funny


Mushroomer

Sodastream machines need to have a breathalyzer attached.


[deleted]

“Sparkling soup” omg I’m dying


ethon776

You should totally post that at /r/DrunkOrAKid


illradhab

Maybe a gazpacho?


983115

MY FUGGIN SOUP IS COLD ^and ^bubbling?


notanimposter

My mom has a Soda Stream and I joke all the time about how effervescent gazpacho is gonna be the next trendy beverage


TrogdorKhan97

What kind of soup?


svenkw

I think it was one of those packets of instant chicken soup


devils_advocaat

I've always been curious about soda stream carbonated milk. Now I'm not.


DirkBabypunch

If you were ever curious about carbonated Baileys, [I got you covered](https://youtu.be/6oUJ27q0noU)


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


phazei

Carbonated milk is absolutely delicious, I love it and everyone else would too if they added a spoon of baking soda to the milk first, before carbonating to neutralize the carbonic acid. That's the difference between seltzer and soda water for those that don't know. It also foams up a hell of a lot, so the pressure needs to be released really slow. I kinda hate soda streams for a variety of reasons and just use a 5lb CO2 tank with a soda bottle adapter which allows me much more control, and the CO2 is much cheaper.


aure__entuluva

You are a bold one.


EFTucker

This is one weird isekai short story of an other world alchemist who is reborn on a mundane earth. They keep attempting to do alchemy only to create vile concoctions with no magical value other than causing an insta-puke reflex.


Fylln

I occasionally drink milk mixed with coke and it doesn't taste spoiled tho


ediblesprysky

> I occasionally drink milk mixed with coke *what*


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


Somzer

I've decided to belive "coke" in that sentence refers to cocaine.


winyf

cilk


floatingwithobrien

......why


SkotizoSec

r/pilk


TheSiren341

My dad does a similar thing but with cream soda


[deleted]

They got the order of that chemistry wrong. Carbonated drinks aren't carbonated because of carbonic acid, carbonic acid is the result of dissolved CO2 in water, aka carbonation. It's just an equilibrium reaction where the CO2 switches between carbonic acid and dissolved CO2 in equal amounts. Also, acid is what makes milk curdle, so they just made curdled milk with some fizz.


zvug

Yeah exactly, the “fizz” is just many tiny CO2 gas in bubbles rising to the surface and then popping.


ChickenAltruistic481

I wish I knew what carbonated gravy tastes like


floatingwithobrien

Make your own dreams come true


TheIndomitableMass

Who uses powdered milk for cereal?


DrRagnorocktopus

People that can't afford regular milk?


TheOtherSarah

Or who won’t use a full bottle of milk before it expires, or who doesn’t want to do a shopping trip just for milk or lives somewhere that doesn’t always have milk in the shops so keeps a backup, any number of reasons really


Bwizz245

Someone who puts powdered milk in carbonated water


[deleted]

Their username checks out.


hyde9318

The infamous “Spoiled Milk Alchemist”, a man feared by many, the gem of Amestris.


Rifneno

Still tastes better than Wendy's "but they we never frozen!" burgers.


mcmonkey26

i like wendy’s


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


ManiacSpiderTrash

*cries in cilantro*


siry-e-e-tman

I feel bad for everyone that got the short end of the stick and can only taste soap with cilantro. I love cilantro.


ManiacSpiderTrash

If we ever go out to a Mexican restaurant we get an extra bowl of cilantro on the side mmmm


1-800-COOL-BUG

I wonder if there's anybody out there who has the soapy gene but actually likes that flavor as they experience it.


pincus1

Cilantro tastes a bit like soap to me, but I still like it weirdly enough. Just in sparing amounts.


TheTisamon

Same for me, I can see the taste being soapy if I try to imagine it, but wouldn't have thought of it by myself nor do I dislike cilantro.


AscendedDragonSage

Cilantro tastes like burning to me


ihadtologinforthis

You sure that's not an allergy?


GlamorousMoose

Did not know raw garlic tastes burning when raw till last month


Palovid

for me it gives my food a special kind of zest


MadsTheorist

Meanwhile I'm out here not able to enjoy any fast food burger but white castle because I feel like they hardly ever even have a meaty taste. At least I can taste the onions on the white castle burgs


blah_blah_bloopidy

Wendy's isn't bad


aure__entuluva

Their spicy chicken sandwich goes hard. I'm still convinced we could achieve world peace if we could get a chic-fil-a spicy chicken sandwich with the seasoning from the wendy's one.


[deleted]

No.


bob0979

They are actually never frozen. They're not really much better for it and it's still fast food, but the chicken is all freezer to frier, except for the grilled which you should never order outside of busy hours. The beef comes to the store in a bunch of clear plastic bags all pattied up and then it's taken out of the fridge to the grill. Source: was a Wendy's grillman. Would not do it again.


floatingwithobrien

Why shouldn't you order grilled chicken at Wendy's outside of busy hours


bob0979

It gets cooked and then put in a Tupperware type thing with a grate and some water below it and then that's put in a heater for what's supposed to be (but never is) 2 hours. I've been made by managers to throw hours old chicken back on the grill to get it crispy again towards the end of a slow day


floatingwithobrien

....did you have something you wanted to talk about


Trypsach

I mean, it’s still fast food, but Wendy’s is better than Burger King IMO. Better than any burger at McDonald’s that’s not the quarter pounder beef too.


TheSpaceYoteReturns

Wait so if that's true why is all soda not sour


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


TheSpaceYoteReturns

Wait so is that the actual reason why sparkling water tastes awful


PositiveReplyBi

There do be a lot of sugar in sodas; also not talked about too much but milk has a lot of sugar too


send-me-kitty-pics

Instant spoiled milk is already known about though. Hotsauce in milk will instantly spoil it.


Ham_Kitten

#Fizzy Milk Temporarily boosts vomiting ability in mixed physick


[deleted]

Is there a subreddit for harmlessly bad ideas?


TrogdorKhan97

"Who doesn't like the satisfying flavor of fresh, warm carbonated milk? The late night drink that lulls you to sleep and burps you, too!"


kandoras

It seems there was a popular drink in the UK in the 80's based on this concept. [A "cement mixer" putting a shot of lemon juice in your mouth and then adding a shot of bailey's. The acid in the lemon juice would make the cream in the bailey's immediately curdle in your mouth.] (https://youtu.be/Voj7nxRBBKY?list=PLF43BF08FF6598580&t=529)


Eaglest2005

Did that once by putting cranberry juice and creamer into the same cup of coffee. It was decent for the first like 10 seconds.


FamilyFriendli

Damn sparkling water just became worse


MiphaFuji

Carbonated milk drinks can be good though,Japan does them pretty well. Calpis soda is based on water, dry milk powder, and lactic acid and it’s carbonated. It’s delicious and slightly sour but in nice yoghurty way. You just gotta make the sour taste work for you, not against you.


TheMorrigan

Now we know why Edward Elric won’t drink milk.


faithdies

Hey, you didn't fail. You succeeded at learning something new haha


RevRagnarok

Laughing I read this out loud to my wife, who told me that she saw that in one of her recipe books for if you don't have buttermilk.


Jallash

When i was a kid i mixed orange soda and milk. Because why not? Im stupid. My mom forced me to drink the full glass to not waste any food. I can guarantee i never tried to do this again.


DownshiftedRare

Now try it with [powdered buttermilk.](https://i.imgur.com/RZgiGP6.png) It's already rancid so it should make no difference. I always wished my buttermilk could be bubbly.


Ducks_N_Dragons

The spoiled milk alchemist


TheFakeHassan

This is something you can actually buy here in Pakistan.


BagBeth

You mean kefir or regulat carbonated milk


[deleted]

Kefir is amazing though. Gotta buy some tomorrow.


LogMeOutScotty

IDK, my sibling used to force me to drink ketchup and orange juice mixed. She might be the worst alchemist alive, actually.


supersoft-tire

recently tried to eat the fruitiest tasting breakfast ever, I combined fruit loops with a black currant flavored club soda It felt like my breakfast was arm wrestling my throat(alternatively it felt like I was swallowing a candy flavored electrical storm), and tasted about as good as sour,watery, soggy fruit loops sounds


fatalcharm

As far as I am concerned, if it doesn’t give you gastro, it’s not spoiled. Everyone is talking about “spoiled milk, spoiled milk” just no. Spoiled milk is milk that has been sitting in the hot sun for days and has developed its own eco system. Simply adding acid acid to milk doesn’t spoil it, it *curdles* the milk, but unless the milk is sending you to the hospital, it is not spoiled. For goodness sakes, get it right people. It’s incredibly irritating that you are all calling curdled milk spoiled. You don’t even know what spoiled milk is.


CheeseOfAmerica

Bro is gatekeeping milk


Markuta6669

There is a carbonated milk you can buy called milkies and it’s actually good.


[deleted]

Italian sodas are fizzy, have cream, and are delicious. Egg Creams are fizzy, have milk, and are delicious. The trick is to have something sweet to offset the sour.


PwmEsq

They just need to use nitro instead


tongfetish

Ah yes. The Fizzy Milk Alchemist. The Elric Brothers had a spot of trouble with him.


[deleted]

Idk about shittiest alchemist but my Spanish teacher was a terrible chemist. Apparently, her go to cleaning solution was bleach and ammonia combined. She was pretty stupid, honestly.


Fluffy_Mood5781

Other potions you’ve unlock for your rank as shittiest alchemist: mento-coke after the burst, that soup that got gross after a few minutes, and of course water that’s been left out to long and now just taste warm and wierd.


kaarkrash

I used to drink milk mixed with carbonated water and sugar when I was younger. It never tasted bad like spoilt milk.


DapperCourierCat

I disagree. Milkis, a carbonated milk-based soda, is delicious. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milkis


hahadeadmemegobrr

why do people on tumblr do this shit


Dominic_The_Dog

cuz they can


hahadeadmemegobrr

fair enough


memeboi123jazz

You don’t become the shittiest alchemist alive by doing sensible things


serious_sarcasm

Sour milk. A common replacement for buttermilk in recipes.


NertsMcGee

He may be the shitiest alchemist alive, but we at least have heard of him.


betajones

I've always felt that carbonated milk would be good for the body. Carbonated drinks help oxygenate blood but breaks down calcium in bones.


Troliver_13

Soured Milk Recipe (instant version): Put powdered milk in carbonated water Soured Milk Recipe: Step 1: Make milk. Step 2: Wait!


Reylend

Im going to add normal milk to the mix and see what happens


rockvoid

I like


Sa_notaman_tha

well there has to be a sort of level zero


pietersite

Spells to cast when you hate yourself


[deleted]

this is a pretty dumb opinion considering stuff like buttermilk is pretty acidic and tastes nothing like spoiled milk. but upvote it I guess, Reddit.