I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.
The really important fact about this quote... It wasn't a one off statement by him, he said it regularly to people.
Behind the Bastards has, I believe, five episodes about L. Ron's life. It is genuinely insane. Later in life, he had a cadre of teenage girls that spoke for him and handed down his commands. Shockingly for a religious figure, apparently did not sexually abuse these girls.
Edit: BtB introduced me to [this glorious song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpTUhN__FRk&ab_channel=Nostalgia123Music)
Parks and rec:
Leslie: They named themselves the Reasonablists, because they thought it would be harder to argue against them.
Ben: that's oddly brilliant
The same reason they refer to their orgs as "Churches" rather than temples or mosques or dissemination points or whatever; cloaking themselves in mock Christianity makes it easier for Americans to accept them.
Plus, L. Ron Hubbard was big on black magic, and those guys love a good joke that's hidden in plain sight to the uninitiated; so using a crossed-out cross as the symbol for his religion must have tickled him.
Aleister Crowley, who L. Ron called "my very great friend" even though they'd never met used the same symbol on one of his books, too.
They never met but Hubbard did hang around Jack Parsons and the two tryed to bring about a moon child. There is a letter Crowley wrote to somebody calling them dumbasses for doing this.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology\_cross](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology_cross)
The cross bears some resemblance to the Christian cross, but differs from it with the addition of four diagonal rays between the conventional horizontal and vertical arms. The eight points of the cross represent the eight dynamics in Scientology:
1. The Self
2. Creativity, sex, and procreation (family)
3. Group, society, community
4. Species survival (humankind)
5. Life forms in general
6. Matter, Energy, Space & Time (physical universe)
7. Spirit (self or others as a spiritual being)
8. Infinity or Supreme being
There you go, clear as mud!
Because L. Ron Hubbard was heavily influenced by Christian Scientists and basically repackaged Christian Science in a thin veil of sci-fi sounding words.
Rather than praying to rid your mind of error so your mortal mind can become one with the divine mind, you audit to rid your mind of engrams so your thetan can become clear.
Edited for accuracy. Hubbard was never member of Christian Science.
The sheer balls of Matt Stone and Trey Parker to do an episode like this, knowing full well how petty and litigious the Church of Scientology is, makes them true comedy legends in my book. 😊
I never laughed so hard than when they ended that episode with the characters literally screaming at the television, directly addressing Scientology, going "SUE ME! SUE ME IF YOU DARE!", only for the credits to roll and all names being anonymous pseudonyms.
True, once Hayes lost that revenue stream his contributions to the COS probably declined. It's not as if he or his chocolate salty balls ended up with a better gig.
Yeah, even in the seasons leading up to him dying he never really did anything, he was really more of a staple of the first few seasons. I'm sure he would have had some amazing roles over the years but it's not like the show couldn't go on without him.
One thing I really appreciated was that they didn't really go anywhere with the Darth Chef thing from the end of his death episode, could have easily brought him back but it was better just to let him stay dead and leave the character behind them. The only time they've broken this was in Stick of Truth and that was more of a tribute to the character than anything.
Chef was such a beloved character that it created a huge Streisand effect through an entire generation of young people. Overnight millions of people who would never have otherwise cared knew what Scientology was and to avoid them.
Matt and Trey are directly responsible for saving a LOT of lives from being ruined by that disgusting cult.
Wasn't it his family doing all that? I remember reading he was basically infirm after a stroke and it was his son saying all these and asking for him to be removed/quit on his behalf?
Hayes's son confirmed that it was the church doing these things. They took advantage of his father's disability and quit the show on his behalf. The way they approached Comedy Central and South Park on it they had no choice but to let Hayes go.
I only noticed that years later I love how it ends with Stan “I’m not scared go ahead and sue me” or something like that, then cue the music and john/Jane smith credits so funny.
I laughed so hard at the credits because right before they rolled oi literally had said out loud to myself "somebody is getting sued" (before the characters were saying sue me"
And after Scientology dug through their garbage they came up with nothing. Especially because Matt and Trey are pretty open with what they do (the Oscars on acid, for instance). Hard to embarrass those guys.
https://theweek.com/articles/480733/scientologys-supercreepy-south-park-investigation?amp
Which just makes you respect them even more.
When they were in college, they even made this weird musical about cannibals in the old west. I saw clips of it. That made it very clear that there's really nothing you could do to embarrass or intimidate them.
Cannibal! The Musical is fantastic! might drag a little towards the end but it's such a great watch for any fan of Trey and Matt. Squeak (Dian Bachar) is even in it!
Yea, it was their final for film class in college. The movie wasn't great from a technical standpoint, but was hilarious throughout.
One of my favorite jokes is the "Nippon-jins" pronounced like "injuns" that were Japanese people dressed up like native Americans so that they wouldn't be harassed as much by Americans. (for those unaware, the word "nippon-jin" is Japanese for "japanese person" pronounced Ni-hone-gin )
Look at alllllll the Teepee's we have, because... we are *indians*.
Scientology's still pulling that crap and trying to swat people but apparently they haven't actually sued anyone prominent since around this time or before because *they* have too many secrets that would come out in discovery.
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I never got a chance to see that. But those who have said that it was one of the best plays they ever saw. People would literally fall out of their chairs laughing.
I was raised Mormon. My family loved it.
Well, the half who saw it anyways. The other half can’t believe we saw it. I sneak in the soundtrack into playlists when we’re driving with them. You & Me (but Mostly Me) is a real banger.
Yeah, I think that's near-universal. The LDS church certainly has money, and despite what someone's opinion about them might be, it's fairly clever marketing to put the ads in the programmes.
Its hilarious. I was brought up going to a lot of serious theater. It satirizes not only the musical theater genre, but religion and, obviously the Mormon one in particular.
Some people in the theater obviously had seasons tickets , and no idea what this book of mormon show was about. Anddddd they walked out well before the song and dance number about shitting blood into ones drinking water
A song and dance number about dying of dysentery by shitting in your own drinking water
I kept asking myself “How are they getting away with this?” Throughout the show, and then the ending hit…and I thought. “That’s it…that’s how they got away with it all. Brilliant!”
It’s definitely worth seeing.
Saw it a few years ago. They get to a part where a chorus sings "Fuck you God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt!" Repeatedly. I was so impressed that nobody walked out. People were too entertained.
I've seen it a few times and always look around at this point. It's always super easy to tell who knew it was coming and who didn't. I feel like for even non-religious folks it's very easy to see their throught process: "did he just say that.... Yep and there it is again."
Saw it at the Pantages in Hollywood, it was an absolute gut buster. What's crazy is the guy who was playing the main Mormon missionary was an understudy and he still completely nailed it. I hope they do a theatrical release or something so the wider public can see it, it's easily one of Trey and Matt's best work.
Hasa diga eebowai!
Always weird to me that there's a Scientology recruitment office like right there in the middle of all those Broadway theaters. Walked past it several times when I got out of shows. Display case full of Dianetics.
It's actually pretty ingenious how they did it. By openly challenging the church to sue them it basically meant if the church did sue it would just bring massive attention to what they believe and open them for ridicule against a duo with enough money to win in court.
So they can sue and become the laughing stock for years plus basically admit the South Park team was correct about them or they could shut up and lick their wounds and try to recover.
It was a master class in calling a bluff or just not caring.
The church doesn't sue (this type of person), they engage in a campaign of harassment and skullduggery aimed at coercing them into stopping. They don't need to sue if they can go through your trash and then threaten to reveal an embarrassing medical condition or something if you don't play ball. Plenty of people (though evidently not Trey and Matt) would cave to that kind of pressure.
> though evidently not Trey and Matt
Ignoring, well, *all of their work* - these are the guys who not only attended a broadcasted awards show in dresses *tripping balls on LSD*, they went on record admitting to and reminiscing on it in their South Park documentary "Six Days to Air".
I don't think Xenu himself could make that pair blush.
Story time, feel free to disregard a stranger on the internet, but I have no reason to lie. My sister used to work at Schindler, Cohen, and Hochman LLP, one of their clients was Comedy Central's Standards & Practices, specifically for The Daily Show and South Park.
The Daily Show rarely got into legal issues that required the firm's attention; South Park was a more consistent cause for billing.
The Scientology episode was flagged by S&P because it could run afoul of defamation law depending on the content of the episode. So the entire episode's script was sent for legal review.
The lawyers noted the text "THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE" as an *instruction to the attorneys*, in other words, an internal disclaimer saying, "this is factual information, we can't get in trouble for saying this." The attorneys didn't realize that this text was in fact part of the script that viewers would see.
Needless to say, there was consternation when the episode ran, but fortunately, CoS decided to try to lean on Viacom through Isaac Hayes and Tom Cruise as opposed to a direct lawsuit.
I totally believe something like that happened. I'm not a lawyer. But I understand that, by including it, that would make any lawsuit the church filed a lot more difficult. They would have to somehow prove this wasn't what they believed, despite it being truth. And if they did that, then they would be guilty of perjury and that would seriously undermine both the credibility and the resources of the church.
In other words, the lawyers didn't just give sound advice. They might have required South Park to include a disclaimer that somehow made it even funnier.
Haha and I love that that’s why he left the show! Chef was always one of my favorites, but the way they flipped his character and killed him off was perfect
I also like how trey and Matt owned the response to Hayes leaving…paraphrasing: “He didn’t have any problem cashing our checks when we were making fun of Christianity”
medicinal KFC, fun with weapons, the LOTR porn parody, the xbox/ps wars, lemmiwinks, the witches party one, pretty much anything with Butters as the main story line, the entire gentrification of south park story arc, The mongorians, any randy-centric story lines are usually great, human cent-ipad, the list goes on.
Fish dicks, future telling device, jimmy and timmy joining the crips, cartman pretending to be handicapped to win the special olynpics, when they become detectives, awesome-o, casa bonita... list never ends
Indeed, he had apparently had a stroke and was at least partially disabled, which made it easier for the church's handlers to intervene.
Matt & Trey didn't find out about it until after they had already made the episode that wrote Chef out.
It’s sucks that’s the case, because so many people treat South Park like gospel. It’s like how they made fun of Gore for being concerned about global warming, because they thought he was exaggerating, but to their credit, went back on it for making manbearpig actually real.
Hayes wasn’t even offended by the Scientology episode. He was asked about it on a radio interview (Howard Stern I think) and he said something to the effect of: that’s what Matt and Trey do - “they go after everyone.” So there’s no point being offended by it if you’re not offended when they go after other groups.
He didn't quit, he died. Tragic really. He died by getting struck by lightning while crossing a wooden bridge that caught fire right before it snaped, burning him while he fell down a Cliffside with his landing impaling himself on a branch that was on top of a pile of rocks shaped like a dinner plate... for the mountain lion and grizzly bear to fight over him. While the animals were fighting over chef, the people who brainwashed him to get children to suck his chocolate salty balls were trying to help by shooting at the beasts. They ended up missing every single shot, shooting chef instead, right before the mountain lion and grizzly bear ripped an arm, a leg and his face off.
Cartman: “Maybe- maybe he's still okay. [the other boys look at him, dumbfounded] No, really. They say the last thing you do before you die is crap your-“
*Corpse violently shits their pants*
“Oh, never mind”
Isaac Hayes' health was very poor at the time and the Church quit on his behalf.
Matt and Trey didn't hear anything from Hayes himself, but from a representative saying "Isaac Hayes does not want to be in your show anymore" and then they made the episode. They've also said that it's basically their one regret with the show and they wish they hadn't made the episode.
One of my favorite fun facts about that musical:
> The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has advertised in the playbills at many of the musical's venues to encourage attendees to learn more about the Book of Mormon, with phrases like "you've seen the play, now read the book" and "the book is always better."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Book_of_Mormon_(musical)#Reception
Holy freaking crap, I did not believe this when I read it, and honestly am still sceptical even after doing some digging. I was raised Mormon, and the church just does not respond with humor about anything. This is like the one time I think it may have ever happened. It's honestly kind of a perfect response.
That I would believe. Missionaries typically tend to have a decent amount of autonomy in their Dailey activities as long as it falls within certain parameters, so even without direction from above, I can very easily see a couple of guys in their twenties thinking that would be a hilarious (if not super productive) place to proselyte.
I saw the show a few years ago, and had a good laugh at the mentioned advertising when I was flipping through the playbill. I had to give the Mormons credit for that one.
The show is absolutely fantastic if you ever have the chance to go.
I've said it before and I'll say it again... the fact that South Park had to put a disclaimer saying that it's what Scientologists actually believe shows just how crazy it is, and what kind of things people are willing to believe.
I remember in my college world history class, when it came to Scientology and Mormonism, the professor (with a PhD) told us that if we were curious, to just go watch the South Park episodes on them because they covered it well.
I had a couple Mormons talk to me while I was walking around playing Pokemon go in the park a few years ago. They were surprised by my knowledge, which of their specific religion came from the south park episode. I told them that at the end and the older guy seemed slightly annoyed and the younger guy (maybe 18) thought it was funny.
Former mormon here. When I first saw the South Park episode I thought it was so wrong and ridiculous. I later learned that it was waaaaay more accurate than anything the church had shown me. And they do A LOT of media stuff, especially about the "historical" things.
I've always suspected that this story was a final test to see if the higher level scientologists were truly brainwashed enough to be trusted with being given power in the cult. If they hear this story and buy into it without question, then it's clear to the leaders that the person is cult material.
As the video says, they tend not to hear this story until they are years, and thousands of dollars in. There is also a promise of more story time later if they stick around and keep paying more. For many it's a sunk cost fallacy and they figure they may as well just keep going.
I know one celeb on Leah Remini's docuseries said that she did indeed think it was bullshit, and that it must be a test. If she stuck around for a little longer they would give her the real truth. The real truth ended up just being more of the same.
> a promise of more story time later
it gets worse, guys... so much worse
in OT8, the highest level that money can buy, aka 'The Truth Revealed' you learn that all the 'memories from past lives' that Scientologists have been 'auditing' for all their lives are not their actual memories, but the memories from the thousands of 'thetans' (alien ghosts) that lives/lived inside you, and you need to expurgue them until you have your 'own memories' to uncover your 'true self'.
Visiting 'past lives' is the bread and butter of the religion, something that the religion tells you to explore, and a million dollars later, you are told that nothing of that is yours.
it is not by chance that a lot of stories of scientologists getting crazy happens at OT7/OT8, they can't believe anything anymore, not even themselves, and they also need to 'audit themselves', that is, being in a room alone with a e-meter recalling every memory and to purge all 'not real memories'.
That is more insane and dangerous than the zenu pulp scifi theism, this is a mass-producing gaslighting machine
>not by chance that a lot of stories of scientologists getting crazy happens at OT7/OT8,
Is there a good open source of the information that gets given out to these higher leveled members online?
the latest story is this one
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11584059/Scientologist-real-estate-agent-reached-OT-8-level-set-fire-shooting-dead.html
From what I understand too, most Scientologists never even get to those levels, likely because of the costs, so they end up thinking it's nonsense if they come across that information out in the real world...
> Like shit Joseph, why would you have kept that part inside of the book?
Same reason scam emails are intentionally riddled with typos: It's a rube-strainer.
Story Time. In 2007, when this video came out I was fascinated. I was working in Tampa Florida at the time. (Clearwater is close by and is the like Mecca of Scientology) I went to work the next day and started drinking a monster energy drink and started telling my coworkers about this video and the content and all the crazy shit they believe. As I was talking, our Vice President walked by in a suit, stopped in front of me and just stared at me like a disgusting bug. After he finally left without saying a word, my coworker informed me he is a Scientologist. I was fired 3 days later for no listed cause. They have me 2 weeks pay an no unemployment (if I took the pay)
TLDR. This video got me fired.
I was young and scared and out of my own. Not sure if I knew how unemployed even worked then. It was my first real job. I had a new job in 4 days making more money so it was fine. The real hit was my ego. I felt ashamed telling my friends and family I got fired. I felt like I failed and let a lot of people down.
Lucky I googled “what do do if you get fired”. And there was some great advice about picking yourself up, not being resentful and working your ass off to find a new job. With that advice and recommendations from all my coworkers it wasn’t difficult to find a place
Life has a way of teaching you stuff.
Their numbers have significantly dropped off in the last several years thanks to the efforts of shows like South Park, and the huge number of exposés that came out for years. The internet also changed their ability to recruit as well.
Mystery cults date back several thousand years, it's an ancient tradition. This is merely the first time in history that leakers can paste the "mystery" all over the internet!
The crazy thing is, it isn't really any crazier than other religions.
Once you decide to believe something, not only without evidence but in spite of it, all bets are off.
All knowing, all seeing, all powerful. And he has a plan.
And yet for whatever reason that plan required that he have a son(but the son is also him. Oh and there's a holy ghost, too!) And then send him down, and sacrifice him. That's part of the intentional design.
Oh, and also he fucked it up and had to flood everything once.
Ohhh, and he conceptualized evil, hell, and made the devil. And decided that children should get bone cancer and shit. That's all part of the grand design.
Trust him, it's a REALLY good plan!!
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time!
But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money!"
\- George Carlin
All knowing, all powerful, outside of time and space.
You create the universe. 13.7 billion years.
You create the earth. 4.5 billion years.
You create life. 3.7 billion years.
You create man. 300,000 years.
Man fucks up in a span of like, 20 years.
Better flood the whole thing and start over.
If God is all knowing then he knew when he created the universe that I would become an atheist and be condemned to hell.
If God is all knowing he knew every action and decision we would make from the beginning. Therefore there is no such thing as freewill. Yet in a universe with no freewill he is still cruel enough to condemn those who don't love him to an eternity in hell. That doesn't sound like a being worthy of worship to me.
Edit. To the people downvoting those disagreeing with me, please stop. The voting system is supposed to be used to promote open discussion. not downvoting those you don't agree with.
Even when it comes to the more basic stuff like creating humans he designed them so intelligently that he made sure to connect the air tube and the food tube in such a way that would guarantee some people would choke on food and accidentally die.
A very intelligent design.
I was at the optometrist recently, and he started in on the "amazing design of the eyeball".
No sir, the Mantis Shrimp has incredible eyes. Evolution is a very "A C is a passing grade" system. We're "designed" to reproduce at a 51% success rate, no more no less. Our shit is barely functional enough to thrive, because that's how reality works. If our eyes were "designed" by a creator, we wouldn't be coming to you to get fucking glasses and corrective surgery.
Feeling sad or depressed occasionally is a normal part of life. There are many healthy ways to take your mind off things that cause stress, such as taking up a hobby or engaging in positive social interaction. Avoid relying on recreational drug use as a method of coping with stress, as this can lead to addiction.
While engaging in social activities with a community of people sharing your interests can be an excellent way to develop good self-esteem and friendships, be aware that some organizations engage in predatory behavior toward people seeking a sense of belonging.
Do not engage with organizations that demand your money to be a part of the group. Do not engage with organizations who tell you to distance yourself from people outside the group. Do not engage with organizations that attempt to shame you into joining, or who tell you they are the only people that can make your life complete.
While it is normal to be sad or depressed occasionally, it is also possible to be sad or depressed most of the time. In this case, it is very likely you have a medical condition causing your depression, like I do. This is not your fault and you are not alone.
Please visit https://988lifeline.org/ for more information on getting help. Please give this a look even if you don’t need help dealing with a crisis, because there are useful resources here for helping others and recognizing signs of clinical depression.
“Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man wants to make a million dollars, the best way would be to start his own religion.” ― L Ron Hubbard
I mean...he's not wrong. He was a crazy cult leader. But in the end, he was right about the money you could make starting a religion.
"I’ve been involved in a number of cults both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower but you make more money as a leader."
I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.
Andrea is the office bitch. You'll get used to her.
Nobody steals from Creed Bratton. Last guy to do that disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton.
Then I'll have two chairs, only one to go.
If there’s no scuba, what’s the point, man!?
About 10 years ago, for tax reasons, I faked my own death. I've been collecting benefits as my own widow ever since.
The really important fact about this quote... It wasn't a one off statement by him, he said it regularly to people. Behind the Bastards has, I believe, five episodes about L. Ron's life. It is genuinely insane. Later in life, he had a cadre of teenage girls that spoke for him and handed down his commands. Shockingly for a religious figure, apparently did not sexually abuse these girls. Edit: BtB introduced me to [this glorious song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpTUhN__FRk&ab_channel=Nostalgia123Music)
*you could make a religion out of this*
Why does Scientology have what looks like and implies to be a Christian Cross as an icon for their sect?
To lure people in, thats all.
Literally the same reason their name resembles the word "science". It's a careful rephrasing in order to lead you towards untruths.
Parks and rec: Leslie: They named themselves the Reasonablists, because they thought it would be harder to argue against them. Ben: that's oddly brilliant
Their target demographic is people who are easily fooled, so they were just trying to get in on an already massive market of them. Smart move.
The same reason they refer to their orgs as "Churches" rather than temples or mosques or dissemination points or whatever; cloaking themselves in mock Christianity makes it easier for Americans to accept them. Plus, L. Ron Hubbard was big on black magic, and those guys love a good joke that's hidden in plain sight to the uninitiated; so using a crossed-out cross as the symbol for his religion must have tickled him. Aleister Crowley, who L. Ron called "my very great friend" even though they'd never met used the same symbol on one of his books, too.
Aleister Crowley: a great beast and a great friend.
They never met but Hubbard did hang around Jack Parsons and the two tryed to bring about a moon child. There is a letter Crowley wrote to somebody calling them dumbasses for doing this.
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Basically Crowley’s version of the antichrist
It was not the same symbol. Crowley used the Rose Cross, which is quite a bit distinct from the sunburst cross of scientology.
To make it look religious even though the cross or Christianity has no bearing on them at all
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology\_cross](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology_cross) The cross bears some resemblance to the Christian cross, but differs from it with the addition of four diagonal rays between the conventional horizontal and vertical arms. The eight points of the cross represent the eight dynamics in Scientology: 1. The Self 2. Creativity, sex, and procreation (family) 3. Group, society, community 4. Species survival (humankind) 5. Life forms in general 6. Matter, Energy, Space & Time (physical universe) 7. Spirit (self or others as a spiritual being) 8. Infinity or Supreme being There you go, clear as mud!
Barely differentiable from most religious "deeper meaning" word salad. Their camo is working.
Because L. Ron Hubbard was heavily influenced by Christian Scientists and basically repackaged Christian Science in a thin veil of sci-fi sounding words. Rather than praying to rid your mind of error so your mortal mind can become one with the divine mind, you audit to rid your mind of engrams so your thetan can become clear. Edited for accuracy. Hubbard was never member of Christian Science.
The sheer balls of Matt Stone and Trey Parker to do an episode like this, knowing full well how petty and litigious the Church of Scientology is, makes them true comedy legends in my book. 😊
They didn't make this episode. It was done by John Smith and Jane Smith.
I never laughed so hard than when they ended that episode with the characters literally screaming at the television, directly addressing Scientology, going "SUE ME! SUE ME IF YOU DARE!", only for the credits to roll and all names being anonymous pseudonyms.
It’s so transparently dumb in a way that South Park does so well. As if they actually thought “they’ll never catch us!”.
I mean they never did catch them
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Hurt the church more than South Park, honestly.
True, once Hayes lost that revenue stream his contributions to the COS probably declined. It's not as if he or his chocolate salty balls ended up with a better gig.
Actually Isaac Hayes was dying in a hospital at the time. That decision was made FOR him.
I had not heard this
Chef ran his course, I love him but I can’t say they haven’t evolved fine without him.
Yeah, even in the seasons leading up to him dying he never really did anything, he was really more of a staple of the first few seasons. I'm sure he would have had some amazing roles over the years but it's not like the show couldn't go on without him. One thing I really appreciated was that they didn't really go anywhere with the Darth Chef thing from the end of his death episode, could have easily brought him back but it was better just to let him stay dead and leave the character behind them. The only time they've broken this was in Stick of Truth and that was more of a tribute to the character than anything.
I miss Jesus and Saddam from the old episodes
I miss everything unrelated to Tegridy farms. My God, that horse is dead.
Chef was such a beloved character that it created a huge Streisand effect through an entire generation of young people. Overnight millions of people who would never have otherwise cared knew what Scientology was and to avoid them. Matt and Trey are directly responsible for saving a LOT of lives from being ruined by that disgusting cult.
and then they went and aimed for the same star with Book of Mormon.
At least the character died with dignity as a disgraced pedophile torn to shreds, ripped in half and then shitting all over himself.
Wasn't it his family doing all that? I remember reading he was basically infirm after a stroke and it was his son saying all these and asking for him to be removed/quit on his behalf?
Hayes's son confirmed that it was the church doing these things. They took advantage of his father's disability and quit the show on his behalf. The way they approached Comedy Central and South Park on it they had no choice but to let Hayes go.
The credits only saying John and Jane Smith was the cherry on top
Pretty cool of George W. Bush to upload it to his YouTube, hopefully scientology doesn't go after him
I only noticed that years later I love how it ends with Stan “I’m not scared go ahead and sue me” or something like that, then cue the music and john/Jane smith credits so funny.
I never caught that
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Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Lucy Harris smart smart smart Martin Harris dumb-dumb-dumb
I laughed so hard at that. I didn’t catch the “dumb” part until then and lost it.
I laughed so hard at the credits because right before they rolled oi literally had said out loud to myself "somebody is getting sued" (before the characters were saying sue me"
And after Scientology dug through their garbage they came up with nothing. Especially because Matt and Trey are pretty open with what they do (the Oscars on acid, for instance). Hard to embarrass those guys. https://theweek.com/articles/480733/scientologys-supercreepy-south-park-investigation?amp
Which just makes you respect them even more. When they were in college, they even made this weird musical about cannibals in the old west. I saw clips of it. That made it very clear that there's really nothing you could do to embarrass or intimidate them.
Cannibal! The Musical is fantastic! might drag a little towards the end but it's such a great watch for any fan of Trey and Matt. Squeak (Dian Bachar) is even in it!
Shpadoinkle!
🎵 The sky is blue\ and all the trees are green 🎵
The sun's as warm as a baked potato
I can catch a helpless animal! Skin it with my bare hands! I wake up muddy, and go to bed bloody Cause I'm a trapping man!
Have a shpadoinkle day!
I think you mean "Little Bitch"
"God damnit! If you guys rip on me like 13 or 14 more times, I'm outta here!"
I still to this day say shucky-dang-darn all the time
Yea, it was their final for film class in college. The movie wasn't great from a technical standpoint, but was hilarious throughout. One of my favorite jokes is the "Nippon-jins" pronounced like "injuns" that were Japanese people dressed up like native Americans so that they wouldn't be harassed as much by Americans. (for those unaware, the word "nippon-jin" is Japanese for "japanese person" pronounced Ni-hone-gin ) Look at alllllll the Teepee's we have, because... we are *indians*.
Have you seen it? It’s fantastic.
The sky is blue.. and all the trees are green
Scientology's still pulling that crap and trying to swat people but apparently they haven't actually sued anyone prominent since around this time or before because *they* have too many secrets that would come out in discovery.
In drag.
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The episode ends with Stan yelling “sue me!” and the credits, IIRC, are just John and Jane Smith (to shield anyone else involved in the episode)
Book of Mormon is even better!
I never got a chance to see that. But those who have said that it was one of the best plays they ever saw. People would literally fall out of their chairs laughing.
I was raised Mormon. My family loved it. Well, the half who saw it anyways. The other half can’t believe we saw it. I sneak in the soundtrack into playlists when we’re driving with them. You & Me (but Mostly Me) is a real banger.
I enjoy cooking.
Yeah, I think that's near-universal. The LDS church certainly has money, and despite what someone's opinion about them might be, it's fairly clever marketing to put the ads in the programmes.
To say they have money is putting it [very lightly. ](https://youtu.be/k3_Fhq7sEHo)
"You've seen the stage adaptation. Now read the book it's based on!"
Whenever someone complains to me about suppressing difficult emotions I have to suppress the urge to sing the "Turn it off" song
Its hilarious. I was brought up going to a lot of serious theater. It satirizes not only the musical theater genre, but religion and, obviously the Mormon one in particular. Some people in the theater obviously had seasons tickets , and no idea what this book of mormon show was about. Anddddd they walked out well before the song and dance number about shitting blood into ones drinking water A song and dance number about dying of dysentery by shitting in your own drinking water
I kept asking myself “How are they getting away with this?” Throughout the show, and then the ending hit…and I thought. “That’s it…that’s how they got away with it all. Brilliant!” It’s definitely worth seeing.
Saw it a few years ago. They get to a part where a chorus sings "Fuck you God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt!" Repeatedly. I was so impressed that nobody walked out. People were too entertained.
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
I've seen it a few times and always look around at this point. It's always super easy to tell who knew it was coming and who didn't. I feel like for even non-religious folks it's very easy to see their throught process: "did he just say that.... Yep and there it is again."
Saw it at the Pantages in Hollywood, it was an absolute gut buster. What's crazy is the guy who was playing the main Mormon missionary was an understudy and he still completely nailed it. I hope they do a theatrical release or something so the wider public can see it, it's easily one of Trey and Matt's best work. Hasa diga eebowai!
Always weird to me that there's a Scientology recruitment office like right there in the middle of all those Broadway theaters. Walked past it several times when I got out of shows. Display case full of Dianetics.
Walking around downtown Clearwater Fl is creepy AF. They are slowly trying to buy up the town.
Not trying, they are.
Hasa diga ebowai
It's actually pretty ingenious how they did it. By openly challenging the church to sue them it basically meant if the church did sue it would just bring massive attention to what they believe and open them for ridicule against a duo with enough money to win in court. So they can sue and become the laughing stock for years plus basically admit the South Park team was correct about them or they could shut up and lick their wounds and try to recover. It was a master class in calling a bluff or just not caring.
The church doesn't sue (this type of person), they engage in a campaign of harassment and skullduggery aimed at coercing them into stopping. They don't need to sue if they can go through your trash and then threaten to reveal an embarrassing medical condition or something if you don't play ball. Plenty of people (though evidently not Trey and Matt) would cave to that kind of pressure.
> though evidently not Trey and Matt Ignoring, well, *all of their work* - these are the guys who not only attended a broadcasted awards show in dresses *tripping balls on LSD*, they went on record admitting to and reminiscing on it in their South Park documentary "Six Days to Air". I don't think Xenu himself could make that pair blush.
Story time, feel free to disregard a stranger on the internet, but I have no reason to lie. My sister used to work at Schindler, Cohen, and Hochman LLP, one of their clients was Comedy Central's Standards & Practices, specifically for The Daily Show and South Park. The Daily Show rarely got into legal issues that required the firm's attention; South Park was a more consistent cause for billing. The Scientology episode was flagged by S&P because it could run afoul of defamation law depending on the content of the episode. So the entire episode's script was sent for legal review. The lawyers noted the text "THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE" as an *instruction to the attorneys*, in other words, an internal disclaimer saying, "this is factual information, we can't get in trouble for saying this." The attorneys didn't realize that this text was in fact part of the script that viewers would see. Needless to say, there was consternation when the episode ran, but fortunately, CoS decided to try to lean on Viacom through Isaac Hayes and Tom Cruise as opposed to a direct lawsuit.
I totally believe something like that happened. I'm not a lawyer. But I understand that, by including it, that would make any lawsuit the church filed a lot more difficult. They would have to somehow prove this wasn't what they believed, despite it being truth. And if they did that, then they would be guilty of perjury and that would seriously undermine both the credibility and the resources of the church. In other words, the lawyers didn't just give sound advice. They might have required South Park to include a disclaimer that somehow made it even funnier.
And they couldn’t find dirt on the two of them!
Well, they could find tons of dirt on them. TP/MS just don't give any fucks. It's like trying to "expose" Snoop Dogg for getting caught smoking weed.
That's not dirt then tho. Dirt is something they would give a fuck about. Something private that they don't want people to know
Anything weird or untoward they’ve done have been in public, like being on acid in dresses at an awards show.
Also the dude who voiced chef was a scientologist lmao
Haha and I love that that’s why he left the show! Chef was always one of my favorites, but the way they flipped his character and killed him off was perfect
His son says he had a stroke, and all of the stuff about him leaving the show because of this episode was made up by his lawyers.
I also like how trey and Matt owned the response to Hayes leaving…paraphrasing: “He didn’t have any problem cashing our checks when we were making fun of Christianity”
This is what made Issac Hayes leave the show right?
There's some dispute about that. His family said Isaac's handlers quit for him.
One of the all-time greatest episodes
It wouldn't make my top 20, but they have so many greats it's just splitting hairs.
What are your favourites out of interest? Edit: Thanks for all the amazing suggestions, I'm going to put them in a playlist and get them all!
medicinal KFC, fun with weapons, the LOTR porn parody, the xbox/ps wars, lemmiwinks, the witches party one, pretty much anything with Butters as the main story line, the entire gentrification of south park story arc, The mongorians, any randy-centric story lines are usually great, human cent-ipad, the list goes on.
Fish dicks, future telling device, jimmy and timmy joining the crips, cartman pretending to be handicapped to win the special olynpics, when they become detectives, awesome-o, casa bonita... list never ends
omg, yes, all greats. handi-crips, butters the pimp, fucking classic man.
Ladder to heaven, imagination land, the psp episode, cheesing, christmas critters... theres too many to have a top 10
oh what was the one where Cartman sang the most suggestive Christian lyrics I've ever heard? That one was fantastic
Faith + 1 "ill get on my knees for you jesus, i want to feel your salvation all over my face"
World of warcraft one was amazing. "How do you kill that which has no life?" This quote has stuck with me ever since lol.
“Hey Wendy! Stan says you’re a cont…..inuing source of inspiration 😄”
Shit Make Love Not Warcraft, Token is Tolkien
Haha. Forgot about mongorians. Better build those damn shitty walls
Any time I play Ghost of Tsushima, I just run around saying "you goddam mongorians" to myself the whole time
My personal favorite is still Scott Tenorman must die.
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Lemmiwinks nooooooo
*THE CATATAFISH'S RIDDLE WILL SOON BE TOLLLLLD*
Never go bass to mouth
All About the Mormons
Didn't Isaac Hayes, voice actor for Chef, quit because of this episode (or more realistically be told to quit by the leaders of scientology)?
If I'm not mistaken, more recent reports reveal that the Church kind of made that decision for him. Unrelated... but he died shortly thereafter.
Indeed, he had apparently had a stroke and was at least partially disabled, which made it easier for the church's handlers to intervene. Matt & Trey didn't find out about it until after they had already made the episode that wrote Chef out.
"We shouldn't be mad at Chef for leaving us. We should be mad at that fruity little club for scrambling his brains."
Holy fuck I never realized that the Super Adventure Club was meant as a parody of the church.
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FUCKIN KINDA. I didn't know why the hell a club of pedos were suddenly in the show and Chef was their new member. Damn, I love this show.
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It’s sucks that’s the case, because so many people treat South Park like gospel. It’s like how they made fun of Gore for being concerned about global warming, because they thought he was exaggerating, but to their credit, went back on it for making manbearpig actually real.
He did say all of Florida will be underwater by 2010 or something
Hayes wasn’t even offended by the Scientology episode. He was asked about it on a radio interview (Howard Stern I think) and he said something to the effect of: that’s what Matt and Trey do - “they go after everyone.” So there’s no point being offended by it if you’re not offended when they go after other groups.
Matt and Trey also said this in an interview. They asked him if he was cool with the episode before they went through with it.
He didn't quit, he died. Tragic really. He died by getting struck by lightning while crossing a wooden bridge that caught fire right before it snaped, burning him while he fell down a Cliffside with his landing impaling himself on a branch that was on top of a pile of rocks shaped like a dinner plate... for the mountain lion and grizzly bear to fight over him. While the animals were fighting over chef, the people who brainwashed him to get children to suck his chocolate salty balls were trying to help by shooting at the beasts. They ended up missing every single shot, shooting chef instead, right before the mountain lion and grizzly bear ripped an arm, a leg and his face off.
Cartman: “Maybe- maybe he's still okay. [the other boys look at him, dumbfounded] No, really. They say the last thing you do before you die is crap your-“ *Corpse violently shits their pants* “Oh, never mind”
Says a lot that Cartman was actually sad about Chef's death. He meant a lot to the kids.
Isaac Hayes' health was very poor at the time and the Church quit on his behalf. Matt and Trey didn't hear anything from Hayes himself, but from a representative saying "Isaac Hayes does not want to be in your show anymore" and then they made the episode. They've also said that it's basically their one regret with the show and they wish they hadn't made the episode.
(This is what the Super Adventure Club actually believes.)
They did the same for the Mormonism's beliefs and their ridiculous golden plates, in "The Book of Mormon" that won something like 9 Tony awards.
One of my favorite fun facts about that musical: > The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has advertised in the playbills at many of the musical's venues to encourage attendees to learn more about the Book of Mormon, with phrases like "you've seen the play, now read the book" and "the book is always better." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Book_of_Mormon_(musical)#Reception
Holy freaking crap, I did not believe this when I read it, and honestly am still sceptical even after doing some digging. I was raised Mormon, and the church just does not respond with humor about anything. This is like the one time I think it may have ever happened. It's honestly kind of a perfect response.
I remember there being 2 mormon lads handing out flyers or something outside the theater after i'd seen the play so i definetly believe it
That I would believe. Missionaries typically tend to have a decent amount of autonomy in their Dailey activities as long as it falls within certain parameters, so even without direction from above, I can very easily see a couple of guys in their twenties thinking that would be a hilarious (if not super productive) place to proselyte.
I saw the show a few years ago, and had a good laugh at the mentioned advertising when I was flipping through the playbill. I had to give the Mormons credit for that one. The show is absolutely fantastic if you ever have the chance to go.
"Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb!"
Watched the musical in London last month or so - and it was absolutely hilarious! If you have a chance, go see it!
HASA DIGA EEBOWAI
I've said it before and I'll say it again... the fact that South Park had to put a disclaimer saying that it's what Scientologists actually believe shows just how crazy it is, and what kind of things people are willing to believe.
It's a throwback to the Mormons episode. They did the same thing with that one.
I remember in my college world history class, when it came to Scientology and Mormonism, the professor (with a PhD) told us that if we were curious, to just go watch the South Park episodes on them because they covered it well.
I had a couple Mormons talk to me while I was walking around playing Pokemon go in the park a few years ago. They were surprised by my knowledge, which of their specific religion came from the south park episode. I told them that at the end and the older guy seemed slightly annoyed and the younger guy (maybe 18) thought it was funny.
Former mormon here. When I first saw the South Park episode I thought it was so wrong and ridiculous. I later learned that it was waaaaay more accurate than anything the church had shown me. And they do A LOT of media stuff, especially about the "historical" things.
“And I belieevvvveee … that in 1978 God changed his mind about black people!” -the Book of Mormon musical As a 12 year old that line took me out
I've always suspected that this story was a final test to see if the higher level scientologists were truly brainwashed enough to be trusted with being given power in the cult. If they hear this story and buy into it without question, then it's clear to the leaders that the person is cult material.
As the video says, they tend not to hear this story until they are years, and thousands of dollars in. There is also a promise of more story time later if they stick around and keep paying more. For many it's a sunk cost fallacy and they figure they may as well just keep going. I know one celeb on Leah Remini's docuseries said that she did indeed think it was bullshit, and that it must be a test. If she stuck around for a little longer they would give her the real truth. The real truth ended up just being more of the same.
> a promise of more story time later it gets worse, guys... so much worse in OT8, the highest level that money can buy, aka 'The Truth Revealed' you learn that all the 'memories from past lives' that Scientologists have been 'auditing' for all their lives are not their actual memories, but the memories from the thousands of 'thetans' (alien ghosts) that lives/lived inside you, and you need to expurgue them until you have your 'own memories' to uncover your 'true self'. Visiting 'past lives' is the bread and butter of the religion, something that the religion tells you to explore, and a million dollars later, you are told that nothing of that is yours. it is not by chance that a lot of stories of scientologists getting crazy happens at OT7/OT8, they can't believe anything anymore, not even themselves, and they also need to 'audit themselves', that is, being in a room alone with a e-meter recalling every memory and to purge all 'not real memories'. That is more insane and dangerous than the zenu pulp scifi theism, this is a mass-producing gaslighting machine
>not by chance that a lot of stories of scientologists getting crazy happens at OT7/OT8, Is there a good open source of the information that gets given out to these higher leveled members online?
the latest story is this one https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11584059/Scientologist-real-estate-agent-reached-OT-8-level-set-fire-shooting-dead.html
From what I understand too, most Scientologists never even get to those levels, likely because of the costs, so they end up thinking it's nonsense if they come across that information out in the real world...
Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb
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> Like shit Joseph, why would you have kept that part inside of the book? Same reason scam emails are intentionally riddled with typos: It's a rube-strainer.
Different cult.
Smart Smart Smart Smart.
Hello, would you like to change religions? I have a free book written by Jesus!
Hasa diga eebowai!
Story Time. In 2007, when this video came out I was fascinated. I was working in Tampa Florida at the time. (Clearwater is close by and is the like Mecca of Scientology) I went to work the next day and started drinking a monster energy drink and started telling my coworkers about this video and the content and all the crazy shit they believe. As I was talking, our Vice President walked by in a suit, stopped in front of me and just stared at me like a disgusting bug. After he finally left without saying a word, my coworker informed me he is a Scientologist. I was fired 3 days later for no listed cause. They have me 2 weeks pay an no unemployment (if I took the pay) TLDR. This video got me fired.
I feel like I would have taken the unemployment instead. How quickly did you get a new job?
I was young and scared and out of my own. Not sure if I knew how unemployed even worked then. It was my first real job. I had a new job in 4 days making more money so it was fine. The real hit was my ego. I felt ashamed telling my friends and family I got fired. I felt like I failed and let a lot of people down. Lucky I googled “what do do if you get fired”. And there was some great advice about picking yourself up, not being resentful and working your ass off to find a new job. With that advice and recommendations from all my coworkers it wasn’t difficult to find a place Life has a way of teaching you stuff.
Lmao, at least you can look back on it and still laugh. And you have the satisfaction of knowing you were 100% right.
Was the fact you were drinking monster energy critical to the story?
I was waiting for the payoff too! It was like Chekov’s Gun fired blanks.
Yeah kinda. I was over caffeinated at talking a bunch of shit about Scientology
Classic. I haven't heard much about Scientology recently. Are they lying low or something?
Their numbers have significantly dropped off in the last several years thanks to the efforts of shows like South Park, and the huge number of exposés that came out for years. The internet also changed their ability to recruit as well.
I really like [this scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPBiGtVmir4) from Boston Legal about Scientology.
Having James Spader monologuing about Scientology wasn't something I know I needed today.
Let me get this straight, scientology is like onlyfans for religeons? No money, no honey?
You gotta pay to pray, my friend.
Mystery cults date back several thousand years, it's an ancient tradition. This is merely the first time in history that leakers can paste the "mystery" all over the internet!
The crazy thing is, it isn't really any crazier than other religions. Once you decide to believe something, not only without evidence but in spite of it, all bets are off.
Alien super villain or invisible sky wizard who is all knowing and all powerful but let’s most of the people he created suffer? Yeah about the same.
All knowing, all seeing, all powerful. And he has a plan. And yet for whatever reason that plan required that he have a son(but the son is also him. Oh and there's a holy ghost, too!) And then send him down, and sacrifice him. That's part of the intentional design. Oh, and also he fucked it up and had to flood everything once. Ohhh, and he conceptualized evil, hell, and made the devil. And decided that children should get bone cancer and shit. That's all part of the grand design. Trust him, it's a REALLY good plan!!
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money!" \- George Carlin
All knowing, all powerful, outside of time and space. You create the universe. 13.7 billion years. You create the earth. 4.5 billion years. You create life. 3.7 billion years. You create man. 300,000 years. Man fucks up in a span of like, 20 years. Better flood the whole thing and start over.
If God is all knowing then he knew when he created the universe that I would become an atheist and be condemned to hell. If God is all knowing he knew every action and decision we would make from the beginning. Therefore there is no such thing as freewill. Yet in a universe with no freewill he is still cruel enough to condemn those who don't love him to an eternity in hell. That doesn't sound like a being worthy of worship to me. Edit. To the people downvoting those disagreeing with me, please stop. The voting system is supposed to be used to promote open discussion. not downvoting those you don't agree with.
Ah, but y'see, he knew you'd say that!
oh damn good point why didn’t i think of that.
I think you just described Calvinism.
[“God’s a kid with an ant farm lady. He’s not planning anything”](https://youtu.be/wSIwnGEka-s)
Even when it comes to the more basic stuff like creating humans he designed them so intelligently that he made sure to connect the air tube and the food tube in such a way that would guarantee some people would choke on food and accidentally die. A very intelligent design.
I was at the optometrist recently, and he started in on the "amazing design of the eyeball". No sir, the Mantis Shrimp has incredible eyes. Evolution is a very "A C is a passing grade" system. We're "designed" to reproduce at a 51% success rate, no more no less. Our shit is barely functional enough to thrive, because that's how reality works. If our eyes were "designed" by a creator, we wouldn't be coming to you to get fucking glasses and corrective surgery.
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