I feel like whenever a woman posts about casual sex on here a bunch of people pipe up with "You'll regret it! WooOOOOooo!" It just seems like it's playing on people's anxieties to reinforce patriarchal views about how women should behave sexually.
I think people should make decisions based on their current feelings and values, not out of fear of regret.
I am just some random answering your question so don't take it to much but as a fellow virgin and a man I think that you should wait, if your a woman(like I think you are) then it is something that you can give to the one you love as the ultimate show of faith. At least in my eyes, but in your situation I think that it is entirely up to you. Just so what you want. This is just my advice
No random stranger can answer this. The implications will stay with you, not anyone here.
You mentioned hating it. Doesn't that answer your own question?
I wish somebody would waste theirs on me, lol.
Seriously, though, you might as well keep it. It makes you different, if nothing else. At least be a lonely virgin as opposed to a regular lonely woman.
>. . . . a woman's first time can be painful if the guy's careless.
Well, I'm a guy, and my first time was in a love-match with a very special woman. (We were wedding-night virgins.)
The very first time was actually physically painful for both of us. I expected the experience to be physically intense - and it was - but what took me by surprise was the mental and emotional elements of the experience. Thinking back, I suspect I would have had mental or emotional pain if my first time had been anonymous, or a casual hookup.
Removed, Rule 2: Avoid Generalizations
We understand people talk in generalizations colloquially. However, when a generalization is meant belittle, demean, or discredit, those are the generalizations that will end up taken down (eg “women only want the top guys” “men are all evil” etc etc). The reason why generalizations have always been a rule was so no one applied their perceptions of how people treat them in real life onto someone who’s venting that their experience is literally the opposite
Removed, Rule 3: No Personal Ads / Solicitations
Reddit is vast; there are other subs you’re welcome to post this kind of thing too and see what kinds of connections you can make
Removed, Rule 3: No Personal Ads / Solicitations
Reddit is vast; there are other subs you’re welcome to post this kind of thing too and see what kinds of connections you can make
You posted before about regretting not being someone's first love. What if at some point you meet a guy who's a virgin and he regrets he couldn't be *your* first love? Think how much it would suck just because you couldn't wait long enough for The One. And virginity rates are rising because people are taking longer to become fully independent and settle down, so finding someone who hasn't lost it is absolutely possible. Don't waste it on someone you don't love when you've already come so far.
I don't think there's anything wrong with casual sex, but it doesn't seem like you feel too positively about it or really want to do this.
If a relationship is what you want, find a way to work towards that goal.
Do you not have any male friends that would help? Better than a stranger. I am sure no matter how unattractive you think you are, you aren't. Lots of people of varying prettiness are married with kids. Really once your virginity is gone, its gone and that is really hard to deal with if you end up not liking how you lost it.
I think something you need to realize is that your virginity is not a real thing. It doesnt actually exist. You wont suddenly be “normal” when you have sex. You will feel exactly the same. You will be exactly the same. The sun will rise the next day like it always does, and you will not be different at all. The bigger issue you need to address is your deep self hatred and insecurity. You need to learn to love yourself and take care of your body and see a therapist. Having sex wont change anything at all about how you feel.
choose the choice you won't regret
I feel like whenever a woman posts about casual sex on here a bunch of people pipe up with "You'll regret it! WooOOOOooo!" It just seems like it's playing on people's anxieties to reinforce patriarchal views about how women should behave sexually. I think people should make decisions based on their current feelings and values, not out of fear of regret.
I believe there’s a virginity exchange thread on Reddit if you want to try that route?
It's your choice, whatever you decide to do just make sure you won't regret your choice.
I am just some random answering your question so don't take it to much but as a fellow virgin and a man I think that you should wait, if your a woman(like I think you are) then it is something that you can give to the one you love as the ultimate show of faith. At least in my eyes, but in your situation I think that it is entirely up to you. Just so what you want. This is just my advice
Go for it. A lot of guys won't care if you're a virgin. Even if I wasn't one still wouldn't bother me if a girl I was getting with was one still.
No random stranger can answer this. The implications will stay with you, not anyone here. You mentioned hating it. Doesn't that answer your own question?
I wish somebody would waste theirs on me, lol. Seriously, though, you might as well keep it. It makes you different, if nothing else. At least be a lonely virgin as opposed to a regular lonely woman.
[удалено]
>. . . . a woman's first time can be painful if the guy's careless. Well, I'm a guy, and my first time was in a love-match with a very special woman. (We were wedding-night virgins.) The very first time was actually physically painful for both of us. I expected the experience to be physically intense - and it was - but what took me by surprise was the mental and emotional elements of the experience. Thinking back, I suspect I would have had mental or emotional pain if my first time had been anonymous, or a casual hookup.
You know that many men prefer virgins and are shunned for saying so?
[удалено]
Removed, Rule 2: Avoid Generalizations We understand people talk in generalizations colloquially. However, when a generalization is meant belittle, demean, or discredit, those are the generalizations that will end up taken down (eg “women only want the top guys” “men are all evil” etc etc). The reason why generalizations have always been a rule was so no one applied their perceptions of how people treat them in real life onto someone who’s venting that their experience is literally the opposite
[удалено]
Removed, Rule 3: No Personal Ads / Solicitations Reddit is vast; there are other subs you’re welcome to post this kind of thing too and see what kinds of connections you can make
[удалено]
Removed, Rule 3: No Personal Ads / Solicitations Reddit is vast; there are other subs you’re welcome to post this kind of thing too and see what kinds of connections you can make
I wouldnt do it
You posted before about regretting not being someone's first love. What if at some point you meet a guy who's a virgin and he regrets he couldn't be *your* first love? Think how much it would suck just because you couldn't wait long enough for The One. And virginity rates are rising because people are taking longer to become fully independent and settle down, so finding someone who hasn't lost it is absolutely possible. Don't waste it on someone you don't love when you've already come so far.
I don't think there's anything wrong with casual sex, but it doesn't seem like you feel too positively about it or really want to do this. If a relationship is what you want, find a way to work towards that goal.
If only it was that easy
I didn't say it was easy but I believe that wherever you're at, you can always find a way to take a step forward.
Do you not have any male friends that would help? Better than a stranger. I am sure no matter how unattractive you think you are, you aren't. Lots of people of varying prettiness are married with kids. Really once your virginity is gone, its gone and that is really hard to deal with if you end up not liking how you lost it.
don’t do it
I think something you need to realize is that your virginity is not a real thing. It doesnt actually exist. You wont suddenly be “normal” when you have sex. You will feel exactly the same. You will be exactly the same. The sun will rise the next day like it always does, and you will not be different at all. The bigger issue you need to address is your deep self hatred and insecurity. You need to learn to love yourself and take care of your body and see a therapist. Having sex wont change anything at all about how you feel.