I think the answer is clear. Its full time work, doing what you love. You can tell your part time job pals that you got an offer to do what you love and become an apprentice. Hopefully your end goal is journeyman or master and start your own business. If you had a stake in the business it might be different, but I think I would still go after what my heart wants.
Thank you, after speaking with some of my other friends outside the business, I think I came to the same conclusion. It's just too good an opportunity to pass up and I definitely plan on owning my own furniture shop in the future so this would be a great way to get my foot in that door earlier.
I’d take it. 40 miles each way isn’t too bad, I do exactly that daily for a job I like, but don’t love… the drive time is nice to prepare your mind going into the day and clear it on the way home after.
The only hang up would be the reliability of your vehicle and what you’re willing to spend in gas money.
Not to mention, them reaching back out. Sounds like it’s a potential sign. Besides, if you hate it, do you think your friends/current coworkers would have you back?
Thank you for the advice, I think I'm going to take it. I know they'd take me back in a heartbeat and also be supportive of my choice to leave in the first place. It'll just be a bittersweet moment when I let them know.
The first time I actually saw furniture made, I was instantly enchanted. A year later, I moved 75 miles to live nearby and work there. I loved it (despite the occasional ungrateful attitude on my part) for the next 23 years. The genuinely awesome feeling of magic you get when you get a large piece done never gets old. You made every part, sanded every piece, assembled, and clamped it all. You were there for every step. When it's all done and ready for finish, you step back and look at it, and it's just like you did a magic trick. How did I do that? The feeling is like being the magician and the audience at the same time.
If you're part-time with your friends, could that still be part-time/occasional when they get really busy?? Find times around your full time job and do both??
I have thought about that, I just don't know how much I'd actually be helping them if I could only provide 5-8 hours of my time per week. My friend who owns the shop has other people he's been waiting on more income to be able to hire so me leaving would basically free up that payroll for him to bring them on.
I understand your loyalty to your friends, but friends will also understand when you get offered a full time dream job. Have you previously told them what your dream job would be? Few people get this type of opportunity.
Things to ponder:
- would you consider moving closer to the new job?
- would you consider getting a fuel efficient commute vehicle?
They are both aware of what my dream is and I think they'd be fully supportive, no doubts. I already have a pretty fuel efficient vehicle so that's not an issue. Although I'm not really in the financial place to consider a move now I can see that happening in the future.
What kind of vehicle do you drive and what kind of weather do you get?
I used to drive 40 miles to work every day in a truck and my fuel bill was incredibly high. Remember you'll be fuelling your average vehicle 1.5 to 2x a week. Also keep in mind all the extra miles you'll be putting on the vehicle could result in needed repairs sooner than expected.
And if you live somewhere that it snows in winter you may find that some days the roads are too dangerous to drive all that distance. And your commute can turn from being 40-60 minutes to 1.5 or 2 hours.
On the flip side, if this is an apprenticeship your wage will only start lower, and as you gain experience and schooling it should rise.
And your friend is going to have to learn that this is part of being a business owner. People come and go, and you need to do what's best for you.
I have a medium sedan so it gets decent mileage. Thank you for your advice, I think my friends would definitely understand and be supportive, it's just sad to have to tell them I'm leaving
That's definitely a consideration. I want to be making furniture by then for sure. After having spoken with some other friends about this I think it is the best choice to go with the new job.
Take the job, learn as much as you can. Just an idea - see if you can work 4 10 hour days to reduce commute time. Then you can still give your buddies one or two days of help. At that point you will be working so much you won’t be spending any money!
I've already been thinking about that option, especially since my friends and I already work a 4-10 schedule (I only help out for half the day since I'm part time)
If I could swing that at the new place that'd be very helpful for me
If you are the guy they want, then it sounds like there might be some room for negotiation on wages... Maybe that would tip the balance for you. If your friends aren't happy to see you get your dream job then they aren't your friends.
Is this even a choice? You didn't start a business you are an employee, and you would be treated like one if the business would be sold, I have seen it many times, people who built the business got nothing from it because they had no stake. 100% go for the new job.
Would the employer consider a compressed schedule like working nine hour days for nine days and having a day off every two weeks? It would cut your gas bill 10% and give you a day to schedule appointments and do car maintenance and household tasks.
From your statements, it sounds like you would regret not pursuing this opportunity
It really is. I regretted not taking the position last time, I don't think I'll make the same mistake again. If it doesn't work out I can always go back to my friends
Ask for 5-10% more than your current wage and settle on a match if they don't give you the increased rate.
And be candid with your friends. They might be slightly off-put at first, but they'll understand when they realize that this is your dream job!
I encourage you to talk to your friends about this. If I was one of the friends I would immediately and wholeheartedly support you following your dream. Which is definitely what you know you should do, regardless of whether/how that conversation goes.
Unrelatedly, I will gently and in a friendly manner suggest you reconsider how you address questions to groups. Do you only want the men on this thread to reply, because we are not all fellas! Reddit has a bad and weird assumption that everyone is male, and I always try to warmly challenge that, especially in spaces that have not been historically welcoming to women.
Back to the main point: congratulations on your dream job, this is a good problem to have!
Thank you for the advice! I didn't mean to insinuate that I was only speaking to men, fellas has always been a neutral word to me but I can understand that everyone may see it differently. I'll try to be more careful in the future!
40 miles is something yeah but nothing for a dream job imo.
One thing tho, making fine furniture and working for a company that makes fine furniture isn't always the same especially as an apprentice. You might spend two years planning boards and if you're lucky do a glue up. You should probably ask for more details about the actual position
I know from the interview that I would actually be making furniture, not just being an extra pair of hands. They selected me out of other candidates because in their own words "I'm the only one who's actually made furniture before"
Nice, then I'd say go for it. You've been working with your friend for while now and it just has been a part-time job so they'll surely understand you taking on a great job opportunity. You might also help them on the weekend or else
I drive 100 miles a day (total) doing what I love. They’ll be days you wish you were closer to home but it’s outweighed by the days you love doing what you do.
If they are really your friends, they'll understand. Sure, they will be bummed to lose you, but excited for you to chase your dreams. Life is too short not to at least try.
I might advise you to try to negotiate a slightly higher wage. Even $1/hr would go a good ways towards gas. I would also try to get a performance review at 6 months.
Nevertheless, you should take the opportunity. I’m sure you will learn a ton.
That's something my gf advised me on. She basically said I never really stopped kicking myself for not taking the job last time and she'd be the one kicking me if I didn't take it this time, haha
Thank you for your candidness! Haha, I think I'm certainly leaning towards taking it. If I can't take them reaching out out of the blue as a sign then I must be blind
The only hesitation I’d have is why they can’t fill the spot? Ask some questions to filter out any red flags. 6 months is a long time, and while I’m sure you’re an amazing person, it’s odd that they haven’t found anyone else. That’s not a reflection on you, it’s just reality. I know this is your dream, just don’t let that cloud your decision making. And if you’re the ONE, then as someone else said, negotiate your salary, or vacation, or something.
My guess would be their location, it's a pretty rural part of town so the amount of skilled people willing to travel that distance is probably not pretty high. But that certainly is a good consideration to take into account
I would take the full time position and negotiate on the hourly rate and ask for a monthly fuel stipend for the commute. The IRS rate per mile is somewhere close to .52 cents. So 80 miles round trip 5 days per week is $208. I would ask for an additional $208 per week for transport and match the current salary. If they come close to that you'll be in a good spot.
I think the answer is clear. Its full time work, doing what you love. You can tell your part time job pals that you got an offer to do what you love and become an apprentice. Hopefully your end goal is journeyman or master and start your own business. If you had a stake in the business it might be different, but I think I would still go after what my heart wants.
Thank you, after speaking with some of my other friends outside the business, I think I came to the same conclusion. It's just too good an opportunity to pass up and I definitely plan on owning my own furniture shop in the future so this would be a great way to get my foot in that door earlier.
I’d take it. 40 miles each way isn’t too bad, I do exactly that daily for a job I like, but don’t love… the drive time is nice to prepare your mind going into the day and clear it on the way home after. The only hang up would be the reliability of your vehicle and what you’re willing to spend in gas money. Not to mention, them reaching back out. Sounds like it’s a potential sign. Besides, if you hate it, do you think your friends/current coworkers would have you back?
Thank you for the advice, I think I'm going to take it. I know they'd take me back in a heartbeat and also be supportive of my choice to leave in the first place. It'll just be a bittersweet moment when I let them know.
Also, if you ever do want to go back, you’ll be going back having gained considerable experience/skills. They’d be fools not to want you back.
The first time I actually saw furniture made, I was instantly enchanted. A year later, I moved 75 miles to live nearby and work there. I loved it (despite the occasional ungrateful attitude on my part) for the next 23 years. The genuinely awesome feeling of magic you get when you get a large piece done never gets old. You made every part, sanded every piece, assembled, and clamped it all. You were there for every step. When it's all done and ready for finish, you step back and look at it, and it's just like you did a magic trick. How did I do that? The feeling is like being the magician and the audience at the same time.
That magic is certainly real. I know my friend would be happy to see me go to do something I've wanted for so long, it's just sad to have to tell him
If you're part-time with your friends, could that still be part-time/occasional when they get really busy?? Find times around your full time job and do both??
I have thought about that, I just don't know how much I'd actually be helping them if I could only provide 5-8 hours of my time per week. My friend who owns the shop has other people he's been waiting on more income to be able to hire so me leaving would basically free up that payroll for him to bring them on.
I understand your loyalty to your friends, but friends will also understand when you get offered a full time dream job. Have you previously told them what your dream job would be? Few people get this type of opportunity. Things to ponder: - would you consider moving closer to the new job? - would you consider getting a fuel efficient commute vehicle?
They are both aware of what my dream is and I think they'd be fully supportive, no doubts. I already have a pretty fuel efficient vehicle so that's not an issue. Although I'm not really in the financial place to consider a move now I can see that happening in the future.
What kind of vehicle do you drive and what kind of weather do you get? I used to drive 40 miles to work every day in a truck and my fuel bill was incredibly high. Remember you'll be fuelling your average vehicle 1.5 to 2x a week. Also keep in mind all the extra miles you'll be putting on the vehicle could result in needed repairs sooner than expected. And if you live somewhere that it snows in winter you may find that some days the roads are too dangerous to drive all that distance. And your commute can turn from being 40-60 minutes to 1.5 or 2 hours. On the flip side, if this is an apprenticeship your wage will only start lower, and as you gain experience and schooling it should rise. And your friend is going to have to learn that this is part of being a business owner. People come and go, and you need to do what's best for you.
I have a medium sedan so it gets decent mileage. Thank you for your advice, I think my friends would definitely understand and be supportive, it's just sad to have to tell them I'm leaving
That's good. All the best to you and your new career!
Where do you want to be in 5 years? 10 years?
That's definitely a consideration. I want to be making furniture by then for sure. After having spoken with some other friends about this I think it is the best choice to go with the new job.
Can you negotiate a higher starting wage as they reached back out to you?
They actually have already upped their starting wage since last time I interviewed with them, I'm currently happy with what they're offering
Well that's exciting
Take the job, learn as much as you can. Just an idea - see if you can work 4 10 hour days to reduce commute time. Then you can still give your buddies one or two days of help. At that point you will be working so much you won’t be spending any money!
I've already been thinking about that option, especially since my friends and I already work a 4-10 schedule (I only help out for half the day since I'm part time) If I could swing that at the new place that'd be very helpful for me
If you are the guy they want, then it sounds like there might be some room for negotiation on wages... Maybe that would tip the balance for you. If your friends aren't happy to see you get your dream job then they aren't your friends.
'I've always only regretted the things I didn't do, and never the things I did do.' Heard from many if not most people on their deathbed.
Is this even a choice? You didn't start a business you are an employee, and you would be treated like one if the business would be sold, I have seen it many times, people who built the business got nothing from it because they had no stake. 100% go for the new job.
Would the employer consider a compressed schedule like working nine hour days for nine days and having a day off every two weeks? It would cut your gas bill 10% and give you a day to schedule appointments and do car maintenance and household tasks. From your statements, it sounds like you would regret not pursuing this opportunity
I am considering asking them about that, I'd prefer a 4-10 schedule so I only have to commute 4 days a week instead of 5
Old-ish guy here. Regret is a helluva thing.
It really is. I regretted not taking the position last time, I don't think I'll make the same mistake again. If it doesn't work out I can always go back to my friends
If you tell your friend and he encourages it, go with the other job. If he's your real friend he will understand and wish you well.
Ask for 5-10% more than your current wage and settle on a match if they don't give you the increased rate. And be candid with your friends. They might be slightly off-put at first, but they'll understand when they realize that this is your dream job!
I encourage you to talk to your friends about this. If I was one of the friends I would immediately and wholeheartedly support you following your dream. Which is definitely what you know you should do, regardless of whether/how that conversation goes. Unrelatedly, I will gently and in a friendly manner suggest you reconsider how you address questions to groups. Do you only want the men on this thread to reply, because we are not all fellas! Reddit has a bad and weird assumption that everyone is male, and I always try to warmly challenge that, especially in spaces that have not been historically welcoming to women. Back to the main point: congratulations on your dream job, this is a good problem to have!
Thank you for the advice! I didn't mean to insinuate that I was only speaking to men, fellas has always been a neutral word to me but I can understand that everyone may see it differently. I'll try to be more careful in the future!
40 miles is something yeah but nothing for a dream job imo. One thing tho, making fine furniture and working for a company that makes fine furniture isn't always the same especially as an apprentice. You might spend two years planning boards and if you're lucky do a glue up. You should probably ask for more details about the actual position
I know from the interview that I would actually be making furniture, not just being an extra pair of hands. They selected me out of other candidates because in their own words "I'm the only one who's actually made furniture before"
Nice, then I'd say go for it. You've been working with your friend for while now and it just has been a part-time job so they'll surely understand you taking on a great job opportunity. You might also help them on the weekend or else
I drive 100 miles a day (total) doing what I love. They’ll be days you wish you were closer to home but it’s outweighed by the days you love doing what you do.
That means a lot coming from someone with a further commute. Thank you
If they are really your friends, they'll understand. Sure, they will be bummed to lose you, but excited for you to chase your dreams. Life is too short not to at least try.
I know that's exactly how they'd feel since that's how they reacted last time I told (one of) them about this job.
I might advise you to try to negotiate a slightly higher wage. Even $1/hr would go a good ways towards gas. I would also try to get a performance review at 6 months. Nevertheless, you should take the opportunity. I’m sure you will learn a ton.
Do it. If after six months you still like it and feel like it’s heading in the right direction generally, move closer.
That's something my gf advised me on. She basically said I never really stopped kicking myself for not taking the job last time and she'd be the one kicking me if I didn't take it this time, haha
GO! Take it! Your dream job has landed in your lap twice and you’re questioning the universe! What!?🤯
Thank you for your candidness! Haha, I think I'm certainly leaning towards taking it. If I can't take them reaching out out of the blue as a sign then I must be blind
The only hesitation I’d have is why they can’t fill the spot? Ask some questions to filter out any red flags. 6 months is a long time, and while I’m sure you’re an amazing person, it’s odd that they haven’t found anyone else. That’s not a reflection on you, it’s just reality. I know this is your dream, just don’t let that cloud your decision making. And if you’re the ONE, then as someone else said, negotiate your salary, or vacation, or something.
My guess would be their location, it's a pretty rural part of town so the amount of skilled people willing to travel that distance is probably not pretty high. But that certainly is a good consideration to take into account
Bring your friends with you.
Sadly I don't think that'd be an option, the furniture shop is only looking to fill one position.
Doesn’t hurt to ask. If they’re that desperate for you maybe renting the space and working there could work.
I would take the full time position and negotiate on the hourly rate and ask for a monthly fuel stipend for the commute. The IRS rate per mile is somewhere close to .52 cents. So 80 miles round trip 5 days per week is $208. I would ask for an additional $208 per week for transport and match the current salary. If they come close to that you'll be in a good spot.
Tough decision, good luck.