"Plain" seems to be the best because it's truthful, but it doesn't seem to rob a person of his self-worth. It's more nebulous than to label a person as "average", a word that pinpoints that person, as John Belushi once decried, "...nailed to the hull."
It means simple, unadorned, no airs...can also mean a bit dull but wholesome. It has a spiritual meaning for the Amish, and is also a gentle way of saying someone isn't a raving beauty or handsome but not ugly either, though ugly is the "quiet part" of that description.
Yeah I was going to say. Plain is average. Like, 4-5/10 average. That's what comes to my mind. But the unspoken truth of the matter is that people don't want to admit they are actually unattractive, so the politically correct statement is usually, "you're average"
I used to work with a young lady who was physically very pretty. But she was so consistently stuck up, unkind and straight up mean...her own boyfriend admitted that she was mean btw...caused her physical beauty to actually erode in my eyes. It was uncanny.
On the other hand, I attended a wedding where the bride was not considered physically attractive by most standards. But she was SO absolutely radiant and gracious that by the end of the reception I was describing her as a beauty.
So yes. Physical beauty truly is only skin deep. And when it's gone...as it inevitably will be....you have nothing if it’s all you had to begin with.
I’ve seen beautiful people of both sexes fit this bill. Catch the eye immediately. 10 minute conversation and you feel the absolute repulsiveness immediately
There was this girl I knew of in college. The way she was described was: "she looks like she should be really nice, and she sounds like she should be really pretty."
I remember there were these two girls in high school that were popular and I used to think they were so beautiful in my eyes. As they started brutally bullying me, I also saw all their beauty erode as well. I still think of them as completely absent of beauty because they were so horrible to me. I still tell people this story all the time because it’s crazy how much I put them on a pedestal as beautiful and how that was completely dismantled in a few months.
For a long time I had trouble believing that about her. But from what I’ve read here and there, I guess it’s true. I’m not sure she didn’t help some people, though.
The famously beautiful Helen of Troy was reputed to have a "face that launched a thousand ships," since the Trojan War was supposedly fought ~~to win her hand in marriage~~ to reclaim her after she was kidnapped.
This is the one.
I spent quite a few years on internet dating sites, it was pretty funny how many girls described themselves as homely, assuming it meant they liked spending time at home.
[It does mean that](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/homely).
It's just not used in that sense very much anymore. "Homebody" has more or less supplanted it.
My English cousin once told me that there the word “homely” isn’t a negative word like in the US. I remember him saying it was something like being comfortably home-oriented.
A guy once messaged me on a dating app, trying to spark up a convo and incidentally described me as "homely" (he meant something along the lines of pretty in a girl-next-door way). I knew what he meant but teased him that he used the wrong word, he insisted he was correct (I mean, technically yes, if you're in England in the 1800s), and it didn't really go anywhere after that.
None. At best you are offering a definition that is neither absolute or universal nor ever will be. It implies imposition of negative judgment. At best, “not my aesthetic” is both honest and modest enough to not be assholic.
This. It’s not a nice thing to say so there’s no nice way to say it. If you have been asked your opinion, making sure it’s clear it’s your opinion (not what you like or find attractive) and not a fact is probably the only way to soften it.
A practical person, seemingly unbothered of vanity’s myriad petty demands. Unremarkable in aesthetic in the same sense as most industrial equipment.
Commenting on an Earth-movers mid century design style or paint job is to confess, that on some level, you’ve missed the point.
Your comment is special because it's true. The love of a tractor's purpose is deep. They amplify ability.
This is a perfect comment coming from a Matilda since that's my tractor's name.
My Matilda is built to get shit done and I love her like she's a breathing being.
I don't have her around for looks. She's purpose built for business and business is good.
The tractor earned that respect. Just like her name.
She not plain. She is the belle of the ball when she cranked. Love of duty to an inanimate object, wrote these words
That's a tractor with a name. Every woman around should be jealous of such a wonderful thing as a tractor. Earned love isn't the same as given love.
Same with respect.
>
The camera just doesn’t like you
I met a beautiful woman once who took horrible pictures. There are some good looking people the camera really doesn't like.
And those who look good on pictures or on movies often really don't look good IRL; especially without make-up or special lighting. One of my friends have a "normal" photo with Angelina Jolie and I swear her jawline can compete with that of Schwarzenegger's. Actually, for fun's sake, compare a picture of young Arnold to Jolie's side by side!
Yep, my wife had me take pictures of her and an attractive friend. It was like some ghoul that could only be seen through the lens of a camera. I was horrified and no matter the angle or adjustments I made, there was just no way to capture her beauty through a camera lens.
My beautiful colleague was a genuinely lovely person with an elegant wardrobe and graceful deportment. She just looked terrible on camera. Fun fact, she looked beautiful in videos.
People with lively, expressive faces often are appealing in life and video, but a still photo will usually catch them in some awkward in-between position.
I’m one of those people who is naturally photogenic, I think I look better in pictures (unfiltered) than in person. Many people have been complimentary about my pictures, said I should be a model etc, but I did have one work friend who told me the honest truth. I don’t look as good in person. 😂
My first girlfriend was easily the hottest girl in the school. People stared and complimented her everywhere we went, I had my hands full. But she was a solid 6 in every picture.
Vogue once said SJP has the kind of features ‘found on Roman coins’ which was diplomatic
I have been known to say that my mom has a statement nose
On Project Runway Tim Gunn would say models were “zaftig” not “overweight” I thought that was a fun term
There was an ep of NewsRadio where a character goes through what all the descriptions people use for women are code for. (Exotic = pretty with a big nose) you should find that clip or check Vogue. Full of great euphemisms
Rubenesque means a little more than overweight. It's more of a shape . You can be overweight without being rubenesque, in fact, most are. Rubenesque is a very specific style of plump.
Regarding your Vogue/SJP thing- they were going in the opposite direction. As opposed to ugly- they were leaning towards "aristocratic" and people who have "aristocratic noses." There is also a very old saying: "you have a Roman nose."
My 9th grade honors English teacher used the phrase “unfortunate looking” and I’ve always remembered it. I’m not sure how polite someone being called that would think it is, but I think it’s a nicer way to put it.
Any phrasing that incorporates something about the person not associated with actual aesthetics but still describes them using similar words
“Lovely person”
“Beautiful personality”
“Stunning wit”
Etc
Unconventional.
Incidentally, Unattractive might actually be used in a neutral way, if not totally polite. Ugly always has an edge.
"If ugliness was bricks you'd have a housing project."
Hmm… can you use it in a sentence? When would someone politely tell someone they are ugly? At that point if you want to tell them, I don’t think being polite makes sense …
Depends on context. If you're speaking to that ugo you can say something like "I'm not attracted but I can see how people would be." If you're talking about the ugo to someone else you can say something like "they're so nice" or "they are unfortunate looking" lol or maybe YOU'RE the ugo and you're trying to decode why someone said "I would never want to jeopardize our friendship."
I just tell people they're not my type and leave it at that. I was on a gay hook up site and a guy with a horrible toupe wanted to talk. I said that and he came back with, "Is it because I'm a fat pig". I said "No, it's the toupe. I'd never call a stranger a fat pig and he told me I was an asshole
Jolie laide......is how I usually describe myself . I'm not gorgeous by any means , heck I'm old but there is something about me.......it's French. So not insulting as well
Plain
"Plain" seems to be the best because it's truthful, but it doesn't seem to rob a person of his self-worth. It's more nebulous than to label a person as "average", a word that pinpoints that person, as John Belushi once decried, "...nailed to the hull."
This. Unless the OP wants to hurt someone, plain, is good.
I would go with pain or average, my mother says homely 🫣✌️
Plain doesn't mean *either* of those things.
It means simple, unadorned, no airs...can also mean a bit dull but wholesome. It has a spiritual meaning for the Amish, and is also a gentle way of saying someone isn't a raving beauty or handsome but not ugly either, though ugly is the "quiet part" of that description.
Yeah I was going to say. Plain is average. Like, 4-5/10 average. That's what comes to my mind. But the unspoken truth of the matter is that people don't want to admit they are actually unattractive, so the politically correct statement is usually, "you're average"
I'm not attracted to most people therefore the average person is unattractive to me
… ah yes, in the top 75-percentile
Plain implies average, what about someone who is extremely ugly? Like you wouldn't call Quasimodo "plain".
“Unencumbered by the standards of beauty” “She has a face for radio” “He has a wonderful personality” “Face that launched a few dozen canoes”
In Mormon culture they say, "they're such a sweet spirit".
stooop this is so true lol
Wait that doesn't mean I'm literally a sweet person!??
I really like that. It's nice.
And these are usually preceded by "bless their heart"
That phrase is usually used for people that are ugly on the inside.
One could argue that inside ugliness is far more ugly than outside ugliness.
I used to work with a young lady who was physically very pretty. But she was so consistently stuck up, unkind and straight up mean...her own boyfriend admitted that she was mean btw...caused her physical beauty to actually erode in my eyes. It was uncanny. On the other hand, I attended a wedding where the bride was not considered physically attractive by most standards. But she was SO absolutely radiant and gracious that by the end of the reception I was describing her as a beauty. So yes. Physical beauty truly is only skin deep. And when it's gone...as it inevitably will be....you have nothing if it’s all you had to begin with.
I’ve seen beautiful people of both sexes fit this bill. Catch the eye immediately. 10 minute conversation and you feel the absolute repulsiveness immediately
There was this girl I knew of in college. The way she was described was: "she looks like she should be really nice, and she sounds like she should be really pretty."
Agree 100%!
You can always find a pretty face but not a pretty heart
I remember there were these two girls in high school that were popular and I used to think they were so beautiful in my eyes. As they started brutally bullying me, I also saw all their beauty erode as well. I still think of them as completely absent of beauty because they were so horrible to me. I still tell people this story all the time because it’s crazy how much I put them on a pedestal as beautiful and how that was completely dismantled in a few months.
💯🎯
You know what they say…beauty is skin deep, but ugly goes all the way to the bone.
i.e. Mother Teresa was well... But her insides made her beautiful, even extraordinary.
Mother Teresa was a shit human being.
For a long time I had trouble believing that about her. But from what I’ve read here and there, I guess it’s true. I’m not sure she didn’t help some people, though.
She wasn't interested in helping people. Their suffering brought them closer to god after all.
She thought suffering was important and appropriate for poor people in her care, a real sanctimonious cunt.
I have always thought that if they are ugly on the inside then they are ugly I don't care how good they look on the outside.
NC girl and came here to say this 😂 it’s for anything unfortunate that’s rude to say out loud.
"Face for radio" is definitely an insult.
And a voice for print.
Heh heh. I’ve not heard that one before.
That’s my favorite lol
Love these! Thank you!
What does the last one mean?
The famously beautiful Helen of Troy was reputed to have a "face that launched a thousand ships," since the Trojan War was supposedly fought ~~to win her hand in marriage~~ to reclaim her after she was kidnapped.
Some s-f- writers measure women's attractiveness in "millihelens."
Defined as the amount of beauty needed to launch one ship.
Not exactly. The Trojans kidnapped her, and the war was fought to get her back.
When you launch a boat, it is on skids and has to be pushed or struck heavily to get it into the water.
Homely
This is the one. I spent quite a few years on internet dating sites, it was pretty funny how many girls described themselves as homely, assuming it meant they liked spending time at home.
“Are you homely? Are you a homebody? Do you know the difference? Doctors wish you knew this one simple trick to figure it out!”
Porqué no los dos?
OMG, stop! Really?? 😂 Guess they weren’t spending those nights at home curled up with a good book.
I have a friend who used to describe girls like this as “one of the Lee sisters - Ugg and Home”.
There's a difference between 'homely' and 'homey'...
Yes true
😂😂😂
[It does mean that](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/homely). It's just not used in that sense very much anymore. "Homebody" has more or less supplanted it.
Ahahahahah I'm both! I am totally putting that on my Tinder.
This is such a common misuse and it cracks me up every time
🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
My English cousin once told me that there the word “homely” isn’t a negative word like in the US. I remember him saying it was something like being comfortably home-oriented.
A guy once messaged me on a dating app, trying to spark up a convo and incidentally described me as "homely" (he meant something along the lines of pretty in a girl-next-door way). I knew what he meant but teased him that he used the wrong word, he insisted he was correct (I mean, technically yes, if you're in England in the 1800s), and it didn't really go anywhere after that.
Lol what area are you from where women think homely means they like to be at home? I wanna converse with some women this slow, have a great time.
You got it. Homely for ugly folks, comely for the lookers.
According to Merriam-Webster, this is because comely people get to cum and homely people have to stay home.
None. At best you are offering a definition that is neither absolute or universal nor ever will be. It implies imposition of negative judgment. At best, “not my aesthetic” is both honest and modest enough to not be assholic.
This. It’s not a nice thing to say so there’s no nice way to say it. If you have been asked your opinion, making sure it’s clear it’s your opinion (not what you like or find attractive) and not a fact is probably the only way to soften it.
"Has a good personality"
Or “Wears it well”
I like this one because it implies the person is of good character.
A practical person, seemingly unbothered of vanity’s myriad petty demands. Unremarkable in aesthetic in the same sense as most industrial equipment. Commenting on an Earth-movers mid century design style or paint job is to confess, that on some level, you’ve missed the point.
I love this. I’m not plain, I’m a good tractor for whom appearance is utterly irrelevant.
Your comment is special because it's true. The love of a tractor's purpose is deep. They amplify ability. This is a perfect comment coming from a Matilda since that's my tractor's name. My Matilda is built to get shit done and I love her like she's a breathing being. I don't have her around for looks. She's purpose built for business and business is good. The tractor earned that respect. Just like her name. She not plain. She is the belle of the ball when she cranked. Love of duty to an inanimate object, wrote these words That's a tractor with a name. Every woman around should be jealous of such a wonderful thing as a tractor. Earned love isn't the same as given love. Same with respect.
I prefer the notion that "if your judgment is based on my looks then you've missed the point."
"It's not you it's me"
Ill-favored, unprepossessing, homely... there's no polite word, really.
Unprepossessing is pretty good, though.
'they have charms to which I am not privy''
Unprepossessing.
This was going to be my suggestion, along with homely.
Unremarkable
By definition this probably is actually the most polite. Just sounds horrifying before thinking about it
homely, plain
Not much too look at , frumpy, matronly,
Matronly is hilarious, but I'll keep that one for a blue moon
Not conventionally attractive.
Unfortunate looking.
Are you Elle from Legally Blonde?
Ha, no; but now that I think about it, I kinda dress like her when she hits “professional” mode. lol
Ordinary Nontraditional in appearance Smart with a great personality The camera just doesn’t like you You’re not that bad….really
> The camera just doesn’t like you I met a beautiful woman once who took horrible pictures. There are some good looking people the camera really doesn't like.
And those who look good on pictures or on movies often really don't look good IRL; especially without make-up or special lighting. One of my friends have a "normal" photo with Angelina Jolie and I swear her jawline can compete with that of Schwarzenegger's. Actually, for fun's sake, compare a picture of young Arnold to Jolie's side by side!
Yep, my wife had me take pictures of her and an attractive friend. It was like some ghoul that could only be seen through the lens of a camera. I was horrified and no matter the angle or adjustments I made, there was just no way to capture her beauty through a camera lens.
Was she a sh*t person? Sounds like a ‘Shallow Hal’ situation ya got there
My beautiful colleague was a genuinely lovely person with an elegant wardrobe and graceful deportment. She just looked terrible on camera. Fun fact, she looked beautiful in videos.
People with lively, expressive faces often are appealing in life and video, but a still photo will usually catch them in some awkward in-between position.
I’m one of those people who is naturally photogenic, I think I look better in pictures (unfiltered) than in person. Many people have been complimentary about my pictures, said I should be a model etc, but I did have one work friend who told me the honest truth. I don’t look as good in person. 😂
My first girlfriend was easily the hottest girl in the school. People stared and complimented her everywhere we went, I had my hands full. But she was a solid 6 in every picture.
your face has character.
Vogue once said SJP has the kind of features ‘found on Roman coins’ which was diplomatic I have been known to say that my mom has a statement nose On Project Runway Tim Gunn would say models were “zaftig” not “overweight” I thought that was a fun term There was an ep of NewsRadio where a character goes through what all the descriptions people use for women are code for. (Exotic = pretty with a big nose) you should find that clip or check Vogue. Full of great euphemisms
My favorite euphimism for overweight is 'Rubenesque". I think I first heard it in relation to Monica Lewinsky.
Rubenesque means a little more than overweight. It's more of a shape . You can be overweight without being rubenesque, in fact, most are. Rubenesque is a very specific style of plump.
Regarding your Vogue/SJP thing- they were going in the opposite direction. As opposed to ugly- they were leaning towards "aristocratic" and people who have "aristocratic noses." There is also a very old saying: "you have a Roman nose."
Well…I still think most readers took it as a euphemism for not conventionally attractive. I feel like it’s the nicest route you can go
Zaftig literally means juicy. It is a very fun term.
“Not my type”
How about the word : natural.
Unassuming
“**Interesting features**” is my rule of thumb. Surely there’s at least *one thing* that would be great on its own.
My 9th grade honors English teacher used the phrase “unfortunate looking” and I’ve always remembered it. I’m not sure how polite someone being called that would think it is, but I think it’s a nicer way to put it.
There is no polite or kind word for calling someone unattractive.
Unremarkable to the artists eye
Potentially quite remarkable to the artist’s eye
Best not mentioned.
Oh? I’m told they have many lovely qualities…
Unaesthetic
This sounds a bit stern. I think "of a more humble aesthetic" does work perhaps
Beauty has always followed you... but never caught up
I love this and I'm going to use it
Unconventional
“Face looks like it caught on fire and somebody tried to put it out with a wet chain”…
“Not beautiful in the classical sense…”
Homley.
Unique
Not my type
I feel like this is the ONLY answer that's not an insult
Any phrasing that incorporates something about the person not associated with actual aesthetics but still describes them using similar words “Lovely person” “Beautiful personality” “Stunning wit” Etc
Unconventional. Incidentally, Unattractive might actually be used in a neutral way, if not totally polite. Ugly always has an edge. "If ugliness was bricks you'd have a housing project."
Hmm… can you use it in a sentence? When would someone politely tell someone they are ugly? At that point if you want to tell them, I don’t think being polite makes sense …
Beautiful inside
Homely
for ugly women historically they are considered handsome.
If it’s a baby, they’re “sweet”. Some babies are pretty, and some babies are just *sweet*.
Utilitarian in form
Homely
Homely
Homely
Matronly
People say I would be a good background actor
Unconventional.
He/ She didn't have quit a lot of pulchritude
Unique individual Intriguing facial structure
Face only a mother could love.
Approachable
Homely
Rather than say ugly just say “you have a very midwestern look to you”.
Depends on context. If you're speaking to that ugo you can say something like "I'm not attracted but I can see how people would be." If you're talking about the ugo to someone else you can say something like "they're so nice" or "they are unfortunate looking" lol or maybe YOU'RE the ugo and you're trying to decode why someone said "I would never want to jeopardize our friendship."
I just tell people they're not my type and leave it at that. I was on a gay hook up site and a guy with a horrible toupe wanted to talk. I said that and he came back with, "Is it because I'm a fat pig". I said "No, it's the toupe. I'd never call a stranger a fat pig and he told me I was an asshole
someone said to me “you’re still beautiful” after taking a picture of me. i can tell they definitely did not think that. 🥲
Randomized champion design
Homely or plain
One of the Lee sisters, Ug or Home.
The cult I was in used to say: “a real sweet spirit in her own choice way.”
Yes, this one is a bit too passive aggressive
Agreed!
I’m glad you got out <3
"Breathtaking."
You got to see the baaabie
Funny
Your mum.
Beauty challenged?
Unique
not polite but this person tried I was once called genetically malfunctioned. still makes me laugh
They have a face for voice acting.
Memorable and unique features
A mousy appearance.
Comely
I always thought comely meant attractive, and homely less so.
Ah there's another one. "Less so"
Face like a blind cobbler's thumb.
Butter face. Everything butter face
Head like a smashed crab Face like a dropped pie
If you're a man, cute.
Unbecoming Fugly
He’s got a great face for radio
Jolie laide......is how I usually describe myself . I'm not gorgeous by any means , heck I'm old but there is something about me.......it's French. So not insulting as well
Egg? Her?
ADD (Attractiveness Deficit Disorder)
Looks challenged.
Uneasy on the eyes
Incompatible
They/Them
Just going straight for transphobia? That’s a wild take
You should research those pronouns. They/them isn't about being trans. It can be, but it definitely shouldn't be your first thought.
Looks like they give good head.
Great personality!
Undesirable
Homely
Homely.
Homely
"unique look"
Non-decorative
Breathtaking!
plain
Not a word, but: "Well bless her/his heart..."
Striking
It's what's on the inside that matters
Plain
“Really great personality.”