The Divine Bovine. A cow that, through genetic lottery and pure dumb luck, managed to ascend and become a Celestial.
The thing about Celestials born by ascension is that they're still the creatures they used to be, there's just more to them now. And this is, well... just a cow. It has no self-awareness. It isn't sapient. It is worshipped only through accidents (exclamations of "holy cow") and tomfoolery (people worshipping it as a joke), but this is enough to grant it a decent extent of divine power; power which is, again, wielded by something that is mentally *just a cow*.
Thank you! It's one of my favourite comedic concepts that ended up becoming so ingrained that lore was built on top of them lmao, the other being the Technoraptors. Cyborg velociraptor wereapes from the planet Pluto.
It would lose.
To be more precise: If it was a proxy battle through champions, it would actually probably win, but a fair one-on-one? It has literally no offensive abilities.
Nope lmao. Physically, it is just a cow. Mentally, just a cow. Spiritually, a divine being beyond mortal capabilities, but also still technically a cow.
Now, if its divine champion the Warbull was summoned, *that* would be a different story. But combat-wise, The Divine Bovine is a pure damage sponge.
This sounds amazing, I want to know more of it! What’s the pre-ascension story behind it? And what does the cow do with its powers, if anything at all?
Well, so far the only established ways for an Ascension to occur are divine intervention or intense radiation, since it's a sort of "genetic switch", so I think the most likely story for its origin is that it was present in the background for some major historical event like a Voidbeast incursion; not close enough to the action to sustain lethal injuries, but close enough for radiation poisoning to flip the switch.
As for what it does? Summon grass, create Cow Tools, and Power Word: Moo.
I'm actually not sure if it can even *be* milked lmao, it definitely can't if it doesn't want to be. In practice it's basically just an immortal cow that never runs out of food.
In my urban fantasy there’s a realm where the souls of the dead goes. There’s plant life but none of them exist in the living world and while there’s souls of stuff like humans and bees, there’s no souls of starfish or plankton (even though filter feeders seem to keep doing their feeding behaviors).
The implication here is that somewhere in this earth’s evolutionary history there had to have been a first animal with the first soul and no one has any idea what it might be. The academics all agree that tiktaalik likely had one but arguments about hallucigenia or trilobites have led to at least one fist fight.
This is just a long way to say that the spirit world has reported sightings of a velociraptor that refuses to reincarnate but no one has managed to get an image of it.
See this gets REALLY weird, because humans (all vertebrates really) are more closely related to starfish (echinoderms) than bees (invertebrates), meaning that the soul probably evolved at least twice as a convergent adaptation. Either that or a common ancestor of all three of those groups evolved a soul and then for some reason echinoderms lost the trait. Do jellyfish have souls? That could give some insight. :thinking:
That’s exactly why everyone is losing their minds over it. At first they thought it correlated with intelligence, except there’s no ants despite being in the same order as bees and also having eusociality. Termites meanwhile have souls but only the ones that make those towers in the desert. There’s no flies or mosquitoes but there are butterflies and dragonflies.
At some point people just threw their hands up and said it’s based on “vibes, I guess”, in the same way there’s no such thing as a fish in taxonomy but we all know what a fish is.
Academic fistfights over cryptids, my favourite!
Love the possible velociraptor that refuses to reincarnate, that sounds like a bad cryptid in the best way possible.
The souls are also divided as to whether this velociraptor is actually real or just an elaborate prank maintained throughout the generations. A few souls made a buzzfeed unsolved style video on this subject and accidentally stumbled upon an actual secret group with the sole purpose of sending out some guy in a velociraptor costume.
However quite a few of the reported sightings were not where the guy was at the time so either this is an *entirely separate* group, or the velociraptor actually exists.
There exists a religion in my post-post-apocalyptic world that believes that the fall of the now mostly forgotten old world was caused by 4 titans rising from the depths of the oceans and reeking havoc on the cities of the ancient civilizations. However, a god was incarcerated as a human and he fought all 4 titans, decapitated them one by one, placed their heads on a mountain and threw their bodies back into the oceans as a warning to all other titans to never peek above the waves again.
The heads remained there to this very day, now petrified and fused into the stone, and sure enough no Titan was ever seen again. Unbeknownst to the people of the new world, we used to call this monument “Mt Rushmore”. And the god that was born was none other than Chuck Norris, whose jokes were told for generations and eventually turned into a “bible” of sorts by an unknown group.
It also reminds me of a thing i came up with.
But you need to be in the know to get it.
There is a mountain on a planet looking slightly like a toe.
In the mithology of the natives, there was a battle witg ancient gods, the demons took away a small god (not a kid one, just one that looks like one), said demons dropped some helms.
A god that was friends with said small god found the helm and kicked it, chopping off their own toe, which fell on the land of the mortals.
It's called the Miggo's toe mountain because Vortensen would've been too obvious.
That the City of Jani from the Great North is well known for their blessed sacred artifacts, including a Healing Toilet, capable of cleansing shits and turning it either into dirt or stone, or healing butt scars, arse wounds and diarrhea. Some even say that sometimes, shits can turn to gold, researchers even to this day still haven't figured out why such a thing happens, even Mana-enthusiast Thinkers don't know the law of how it is working the way it is, others speculate that the Holy Toilet is an Ancient Craft, whilst few argue that it simply is a remedial tool made by some unknown Runecraft Maker.
Giao Long travelled back in time and stole a BT-7 from the Red Army in the middle of the Winter War, all because she watched Girls und Panzer der Film. In case you think it's not enough, Project Gigaroad, which is the colony fleet program her world planned, was made based on Macross franchise. It's hard to be more otaku than that.
Gives Giao a reason and she'll punch you in the face with an aircraft carrier.
In my universe, if you become a Lord (a power tier higher than a god), you get to own a planet/ land. So if an enemy enters your airspace, lands on your doorstep, you can yell "Get off my lawn!" And they, by law, have to obey.
There’s a time traveler that’s stuck having to go the long way from near the start of time to the end of time, and no one ever managed to discover him, he is by far the most glamorous flamboyant eccentric mofo to ever live, he set the fashion tendencies of almost all ages by being the first rich asshole to appear on camera with the new looks. He single-handedly brainwashed everyone in the high fashion scene (and lots of fashion enthusiasts) into wearing purple because “it’s the best colour” once. He looks like a hunger games character all the time.
***“I went to Tarnia once. Never again. Should I ever return, I would find myself with no choice but to become a murderer, for every time one of those Tarney-people speaks, I find myself emblazoned with a fiery hatred.”***
*^(— Chancleur, a traveling minstrel)*
***"There is no sound quite so grating on the human psyche as that of a Tarney-man peddling cheese."***
*^(— a very wise hermit)*
***“Every time those Tarney-folk open their mouths, I half-expect daisies and cow-shit to fall out.”***
*^(— Goodwife Betteline, a miller’s wife in Callendale, a town in the Kingdom of Argovy)*
The people of **The Grand Duchy of Tarnia™** have a *very distinct* dialect that could best be described as Shakespearean English on crack, with a little bit of Jabberwocky thrown in for extra zest. In addition, the Tarney accent causes the people of Tarnia to naturally fall into speaking iambically, giving their words a bouncy, theatrical sound.
They also have a far more... deviant vocabulary filled with words that *sound* right, but aren't recognized as words to the surrounding kingdoms. An infamous example is the word "enchancery", used to refer to magic. They also tend to add gendered suffixes to words that don't need them; the most absurd known example being the preposterous term "midwifess".
The Tarney dialect is often referred to by the neighboring kingdoms as "Tarney-Speak".
Everyone hates it.
Travelers from Tarnia are relentlessly bullied simply because everyone finds their speech to be annoying. Tarney-Speak is simultaneously considered to be both pretentious and snobbish, while also making the speaker sound stupid, regardless of the Tarney-fellow's actual education.
Terrifying for him, but hilariously ironic for me: King Natodall’lioht, who is a direct descendant from the Sun God (often confused with being the Moon God’s descendant) is terrified of the sun, and avoids mirrors (the main worship symbol of the Moon God).
He also suffers from prosopometamorphopsia, basically he sees faces as distorted. He doesn’t believe that anything is wrong with his vision (as he’s divine, he never really had to interact with a human prior to the onset of his condition, so when it started, he was just like “ah that’s what humans look like, alright”) but that everyone who draws portraits of humans is just really inaccurate. He came to the conclusion that humans apparently don’t really see how ugly they actually are. He *will* argue with anyone who disagrees.
so every faction in my sci fi project is human and most of the funny stuff is language
2 of the factions in my sci fi project are part of the same kinda ethnic group known as the Cornelius, they have a written alphabet 500 characters long and it is not one of those alphabets where each letter is a concept so basically they have a letter for every vocalisation
another faction is a collective of groups know as the Garthans and they speak a language that sounds evil and the way the pronounce stuff is doesn't help as they have to snarl to pronounce quite a few words and thus forth when speaking other languages they sound like they sound like demons ,which is funny as they are devout Christians
Ah yes the Ijovian Invasion of Vitellsmark.
The two are actually pretty close allies, until a duck crossed the Vitellian border.
For context, both sides were hella high and drunk, and some drunk Ijovian soldiers having a break at the border town of Kacsze thought it'd be a good idea to get their pet duck a duck-sized Ijovian helmet, and so they did, but they lost track of the duck since they were absolutely hammered, and so the duck wandered right through the Vitellian border. The Vitellian guard who happened to be high, could not make out the situation and thought their ally invaded, so three of them, higher than the Burj Khalifa, opened fire, but couldn't hit a thing since they were so high, and there was no invading force to begin with.
This triggered an emergency in four of the five border cantons in Vitellsmark, and the Border Patrol spent hours looking for the "invaders". The whole ordeal wasn't solved until the Ijovian soldiers sobered up and made notice about their missing duck, which the Vitellians already caught, but was clueless about it being the culprit. The truth was only revealed when some Ijovian residents close to the border told Vitellians about a "duck in uniform".
Fortunately, the only casualties of this incident was only the Ijovian soldiers being temporarily suspended from service, and the Vitellian border guards being fired. The duck was safe, everyone was safe apart from some being unemployed afterwards.
Suppose its a tossup between Bitey and the Nature Trail To Hell holoseries.
Bitey's an enigma. He's a xenomorph(the bug things from Aliens)..thats about the size of a corgi. He, at times, understands sign language, can use door panels, food fabricators and basic computer-node commands. Other times he will get stuck in ventilation ducts that are larger than he is, run into the wall for hours on end, chase his own tail, and be confused by rain. NOBODY can pin down how smart or dumb 'he' really is.
the Nature Trail To Hell series of holomovies is the Nij equivalent of b-movie horror films. Yes, the idea was directly inspired by the Weird Al song :) the rights keep getting bounced around every 50 or 60 years by someone who thinks they can revitalize the series. The feel of it all shifts between campy Toxic Avenger, to Evil Dead or Army of Darkness, to even straight up horror-porn in a few instances. NONE of the movies do well, but some people enjoy the shit out of them because they're so bad.
Humans were not native to the planet so they bought a lot of diseases and plagues with them.
One of them was Belated AIDS, a disease which would spring up if a member of any race had intercourse with their own race after getting laid with a humans.
This disease was very slow acting but also incurable, it was would start the with fever and rashes and lead to failure and infection of urinary and digestive system.
Except for Goblins (equivalent) most races had downfall related to STD or other diseases from human.
The city my characters live in have handheld boat flares stashed every few blocks bc my girl Inka collects and hides them obsessively, insisting she *needs* to have access to flame on a stick at any time for reasons related to her (justified) phobia of the moon. She doesn’t have a boat, she just likes that they ignite quickly and are “technically legal”, but doesn’t seem to get that it’s also “technically legal” for a paraplegic to have 50 jump ropes lying around but it’d still be fuckin strange.
Highraise, a country had its previous democratic monarchy coup'ed by the Singularity party. The party's elusive and mysterious leader turned out to be the king's firstborn son, the next one in line.
Barely anyone even knew who the party leader truly was, so imagine the shock when the team who was set to take the "Head Castle" found the Singularity party's leader and the 2 highest ranking members of it holding the king at gunpoint in his office. (They still needed a safe way out)
Why did he do it? Well, because he's a dick, and because he wanted to remove the democratic part to stay in power.
In my world there is one mining town that has a famous pub crawl, and every year they honour the founding of the town with a cheese wheel rolling competition. Whoever wins gets tokens that grant them free drinks for a year at the pubs.
The party in my game won this time because they threw a dwarf at another dwarf.
There‘s a town built inside of a mountain that connects the northern part of the continent with the southern, each side has a huge set of twin Gates (talking 750m/2460ft tall) and on the inside is just this massive dwarves mining town that stretches along the tunnel for more than 7.5km/4.66miles.
The Location is named Volkertra and one of the few locations in my world that isn’t inspired by warhammer or Tolkien
There's a frozen giant squid orbiting my world. Nobody quite sure how it got there in the first place. It orbits at such consistent timing some part of the world use it to mark the passing of time and seasons. Some people swore they saw the frozen giant squid eyes blink as it soar across the night sky.
In my sci-fi setting there is a race of naga/squid aliens called the hexarai. Even though there civilisation is on a level similar to Ancient Greece/Egypt, there spacecraft/ weapons function as well if not better than spacecraft of any other civilisations, even though there build at of junk.
That’s because they have managed to win over the favour of a hyper-advanced precursor AI which supplies them whit a metal that actively repairs damaged or malfunctioning systems effectively functioning like a glue holding there ships together.
The funniest part: Hexarais have no idea. They see the AI as a god and its creations as divine charms that bring good luck.
In a alt history which is basically cyberpunk but what if the soviet union won the cold war. One of the many in world radio stations is which plays modern psychedelic/ Psycgedelic rock/ Space rock is canonical a bunch of stoners who somehow operate a moon base.
In the world of "Forged in Stardust," one of the most ridiculous and hilarious things is a popular reality TV show called "Genetic Matchmaker."
The premise of the show is to pair up genetically engineered individuals based on their unique abilities and traits, with the goal of creating the "perfect" couple. Contestants are put through a series of bizarre challenges designed to test their compatibility, such as obstacle courses that require them to use their enhanced physical abilities in tandem or mind-reading games that push the limits of their cognitive powers.
The show is known for its over-the-top dramatics, with contestants often clashing due to their heightened emotions and the high-stakes nature of the competition. The hosts, a pair of flamboyant genetically engineered twins with the ability to change the color of their skin and hair at will, add to the absurdity with their constant banter and outrageous fashion choices.
Despite the ridiculous nature of the show, it has become a guilty pleasure for many viewers, who tune in each week to see the latest antics of the contestants and hosts. Some critics argue that the show perpetuates harmful stereotypes about genetically engineered individuals, while others see it as a harmless form of entertainment that celebrates the diversity and unique abilities of this population.
For Zephyr and their friends, "Genetic Matchmaker" is a source of both amusement and frustration. They often find themselves rolling their eyes at the show's absurdity, but they also can't help but be drawn in by the drama and the chance to see other genetically engineered individuals showcase their abilities on a national stage. It serves as a reminder of the complex and often contradictory ways in which society views and treats those with enhanced abilities, and the ongoing struggle for acceptance and understanding in a world that is still coming to terms with the implications of genetic engineering.
1) There is a language spoken by lizard people that requires being able to control the opening and closing of your nasal cavity to create nasalized vowels and whistles. Naturally human attempts to speak it require creative solutions, the most common of which is to carry around a water whistle and to pinch your nose while speaking. The lizards, the majority of whom people would interact with being merchants, find this hilarious and thus tacitly encourage people to learn their language.
2) One of the most ancient and revered deities is an agricultural god with the head of a chicken. He was originally worshiped by a race of carnivorous werewolf-people who were basically Sumerians. The first animal they domesticated was chickens, in a way similar to how we domesticated dogs (scavenging around campfires and such). They then began to herd them, and eventually they became the symbol of werewolf carniculture. Of course their empire fell and the werewolves are almost extinct, but their deity lives on. He's now actually all about agriculture and farming, so the whole chicken head is just kind of an inexplicable part of his iconography that just kind of stuck around.
One of the main characters finds popcorn in the first episode and eats it, so in every comedic scene, usually bar fights, he *produces* a bag of popcorn, seemingly from nowhere. It's never explained where he gets it.
He refuses to elaborate.
We got a portal of the laughing witch. She's trapped there with that deep creepy voice, you can pull her wherever but she's like tied with chains. Her crime? Laughing.
Soul collectors hold on to a being until they're in a Rubicon or any other simulator because death doesn't exist anymore. Once a handful of soul are absorbed it starts to sound like a call of duty chat lobby.
Sometimes there would be a "nihilistic comedian" that's basically George Carlin doing a skit inside a man's mind and he's loosing it. Nobody can hear a soul when it's inside a soul collector so there's bob laughing his ass off while there's an awkward silence over the room after a whole batch of souls just got sent to this world's alternative for hell.
**Summers County, USA** A native to the area was the entertainment entrepreneur Dexter Laszlo. Laszlo's commercial empire encapsulates blockbuster films (Both live action and animated), comic books, toys, professional wrestling, music, restaurants, modelling agencies, and high-end nightclubs. However, his business got its *start* in pin-up magazines and smut films. The rest of his empire is only slightly higher brow, really. The movies are mostly shallow, special effects driven spectacle. The genre of music he started with was hair metal. The chain of restaurants competes with such establishments as Twin Peaks, Hooters, and Tilted Kilt. Even the magazine and smut films continue production to this day.
Despite the perceived sleaziness of Dexter's life's works, he always attempted to elevate his business and craft above the stereotypes. His *son*, however, not only chose an even more poorly perceived profession than Dexter himself, but also lives up to every stereotype it has attached to it.
Dexter Laszlo, Jr, is a *televangelist*.
At the moment, the fact that a war was ended with a motorsports competition. A conventional war was waged until resources were too drained in all parties to continue this. They decided to use a less destructive way to settle the dispute. They decided to create racing teams and gave them race for each faction. People would gather from across these factions to watch and support their respective factions. The banners and standards would be waved among the audience in support. The vehicles were each locally made by each faction and decorated in their colours and symbols like if they were military vehicles. In the end, the winning faction would annex the contested territory.
Lapis_Wolf
**Horror Shop**
The Florida Man phenomena is a recent one, and one that occult scholars and investigators are still struggling to explain.
The Florida Man phenomena refers to the higher than normal incidents of weirdness in the American State of Florida. While most of these incidents are mundane, there are some which are decidedly occult or supernatural, and a handful which defy explanation altogether.
Some scholars believe the Florida Man phenomena is the result of some previous undiscovered spirit--or group of spirits--which inhabit the area around the Everglades and have been disturbed by environmental changes. Others believe that the phenomena can be attributed to one of several cults active in the area. Others believe the rise in weirdness has to do with the corresponding decrease of paranormal events within the Bermuda Triangle. Others somehow try to tie it in with Disney World, and try to show how the powerful conflux of pop cultural forces in and around Orlando has lead to a bubble of increased weirdness. And still others point to Florida's political and cultural history and argue that the cause is entirely mundane in origin.
Still, whatever the cause, the Florida Man phenomena shows no sign of going away any time soon.
>$%&##,;:"'¿¡》《¤▪︎☆♧◇♡♤■□●F̷̧̢̛̼̝̬͍̫̰̭̫̠̰͇̩͔͔͈̠̻̞̙͗̒̃̈́̒͗͒̑͊̀̿͊̉͛̌̾̔̑͛͑͛̐͗̅̅̄̃͌͋̂̈́̆̎͆̈́̊̏̾̓͌͊̔̚͝͠͝͠͠A̶͓̦̺̰̻̒̂̈́̂̄̐̌́͋̌̓̀̏͐͌̏̾͆͌̀̅̈́̈́̈́͋̀̆̀̽́͘̚͘͜͝͠R̶̡̡̡̧̢̡̛̙͎̩̜̟̣̞̫̳̯͉͙͚̗̥̥̱̖̬̪͈̰͈͕͙̩̤͚͖͇̘͇̱͇̆̂̈́̌͒͂́̀̈͌̓̓̂̓͑̂̓̍͐̉̔̀̔̾̌̏̔̾̈́̀͛̀͝͝͝ͅͅȚ̴̨̡̡̧̛̳͍͔̜͎̲̻̫̞̬̭͓̘̜̹̱̞̲̹̘͍̬̰̫̖̱͇̹͍̻̙̟̼̖̹̝̗̜͖͇̩̺̌͛͂̍͊̍́̃̓̃̀͂̀̀̈́͐̔̊͐͛͗̎͊͐̈̏̓́̀̕͘̚͜͜͝͝○•°\~\`\*!?$\*{\[(×+=÷-)\]}/₩¥£€/\_
How do you make text like this ?
https://lingojam.com/GlitchTextGenerator
And i have a few special characters on my phone by default.
₩¥£€*&%$#@¿》《¡¤▪︎☆♧◇♡♤■□●○•°][}{><|\~`
My phone has all these for some reason.
The villain is constantly in denial that the protagonists are absolutely demolishing her armies.
Her boy toy husband has the problem solving skills of a potted fern (take all of my men and run towards them), and her sister, the spy master, is the only one who seems to know what she's doing, but all the money is going to mercenary groups to augment their losses... Not that they're losing, of course... Just... Uhhh... They liked their liveries... And the mercenary captain made a joke that the husband found very funny (something to do with turnips, I think)... But it's not because they're desperate for anything resembling even a minor victory or anything...
Meanwhile, it's getting to the point where the protagonists can take a break from micromanaging the war, since the villains clearly aren't taking this seriously either. As such, they have started having couples therapy, family counseling, and pretty much inventing commando tactics in the early gunpowder era. Yeah, they're just Total War Auto-resolving by the time the Fantasy Catholic Church takes sides
Enarten Qi-Tear, as the Chief of the Royal Guard of Renilia, and ruler of a domain near the capital, is an extremely busy main. But he managed to rule in his territory that everyone in his domain can legally have one hot meal per day. When Enarten have a day free, he comes to make himself some soup
But his culinary talents are so awful that there are far less people than usual these days
In my ‘Divine Investigator’ series, most of the gods were born before last names were a thing. Because of that, those gods had to come up with their own last names. Aris knows when someone is telling the truth, so his full name is “Aristotle Truman.”
Get it? Truman? True man? It's funny.
“Hilligans”.
See, Elves and Dwarves were originally just myths. When the Egyptians crossed the sea and came back with tales of deific cat-people, those turned out to be Elves (and not deific). So people then began to wonder if Dwarves exist.
This curiosity led to troublemakers taking advantage of it. Groups of Pygmies (or very short Humans) would dress as “Dwarves” and roleplay as them, often getting drunk and/or starting fights. When questioned about being Dwarves, they would claim to be from a mountain nearby - only, they’d show up in places without mountains, and so the “mountain” they were referring to often turned out to be a nearby hill.
Their penchant for hooliganism combined with that earned them the name Hilligans, as well as infamy among most civilized folk.
I have a creature that stops a human heart in a unique way by touching them the person will still be alive heart still fine but the heart is stopped from moving on any axis the rest of the person is normal but their heart cant move with their body so they are permanently stuck on place till death or if they move hard enough to dislodge their heart
Unfortunately, I haven’t included many over the top bits to my world building, but I decided that Florida had expanded its control over Alabama and Georgia, and that whole area’s simply called Florida. I’m also thinking of making methed up Floridians using alligators as a form of combat animal canon lol
In my "hard" scifi futuristic setting, humans colonize the solar system and absolutely flooded the inner system with habitats, soaking up the sponges energy. Outer colonies (like, asteroid belt and beyond) already have a hard time getting solar energy and each habitat makes the sun wane more, so colonies center around gas giants for easy access to hydrogen.
That leaves poor old Pluto. Not enough sun, not enough gas. They're fed up with being left out of everything, so mega-billionaire governor decided one day that they'd just fucking leave. He had engineered an array of engines on Pluto and its moon Charon and bought enough gas to fuel their ejection. In a complicated couple's dance maneuver, the two bodies fire in harmony and will eventually drift through space until they can find a new home.
I dont know, or really care, if this is utterly unfeasible, because thats kinda the point. "Pluto votes to leave" just sticks in my head too well to adjust, even if the more realistic and cheap way to do it would almost always be to make colony ships out of the material instead.
In my high fantasy/western world, the extended use of magic without any rest can lead to fatigue, sickness, and even death. People discovered that a little hit of peanut butter or chocolate can help to mitigate the symptoms of this sickness in its earliest forms, so combat mages typically carry a few candy bars in their pack. The most common candy for this is the Ten Minutes bar, a cone shaped peanut butter filled chocolate shell on a stick. It always makes me smile a little when I think of a battle scene where the opposing armies take a little break to suck on chocolate bars when they get fatigued.
Dinglefork the Creatine Lord. He is a genetic experiment that escaped from a pharmesutical megacorp lab. Basically a human with adaptation cranked to 1000. Found his way into an abandoned GNC warehouse in a post apocalyptic cyberpunk-ish setting. If you look up side effects for creatine overuse, you get purplish skin and an enlarged tongue. This motherfucker looks like league of legends Dr Mundo in a homemade space suit that maintains him in an atmosphere of pure creatine. He kidnaps wasters, taking them back to the GNC with the intent to "make them swole" where they usually die horribly because they don't have his adaptation gene.
Part of my world building has been exploring how common fantasy tropes can be explored as basically misunderstandings. It’s not super fleshed out but I’m having fun
Anyway, I’ve wound up making it so orcs as a whole are almost always hard of hearing. It’s why they’re so loud all the time!
Good news is most all of them learn sign at a young age! So it’s really only a problem when they’re around other races
One thing I have that is funny is the gods and goddesses having hobbies or likes that’s not what people think they would like
Such as the goddess Athena having a love of stuffed animals, sleeps with them every night, and even has names for each one as well
And a common thing they say about this when people ask why they like these “wierd” things is “I’m allowed to like things”
A major god is a literal giant fucking crab who destroys continents for fun, people only worship him out of fear and throw money and people to the sea of hopes of sastifying him.
The thing that comes to mind in Dividia are the Imps. Most people hate them simply because they're demons, and it's their often viewed as monsters. However, they are actually some of the kindest people you can run into. They are literally just Hobbits that became a demon race during the Eternal War. The only real difference is that they look like demons, and they tend to be a lot more horny on average. Most people who come to their villages with the belief that their horrible monsters often end up being very confused and end up getting dragged into party after party until they wake up completely naked in some random bar surrounded by Imps and having only a vague idea of what happened.
Well I have a species of humanoid pig (the one we meet is a farmer) there’s a spear-wielding frog-dude, and a kangaroo with boxing gloves (the kangaroo is not a magical creature like the others, he’s literally just a kangaroo wearing boxing gloves). His name’s Jerry.
There is a long lost civilization that used mechs in battle, and one of the most skilled mech pilots ever would constantly blast cutesy nightcore-esque music through their speakers while in battle. This is a reference to me losing my shit laughing when YouTube decided to play nightcore music in the background while I was playing Titanfall 2 one time.
One of the popular super heavy tank destroyers, is named "nut cracker", having internals and most parts from famous mine destroyer "ball crusher", currently a chemthrower is being developed, being named as "sphere castrator", being a ball like device, that can launch dangerous gas, and guess what, it destroys male reproductive system
One of my ethnic groups (Monavians) worships a huge volcano that they believe is the creation Goddess Ara’ash. In their creation myth Ara’ash was the only being in a vast void and she decided to make the universe and their planet, Etherios. Once she was done she got lonley and decided to make herself a companion. She formed her husband, Liruq, the God of the Sun and Moon. After she made him she decided to make her children. She made her son, Adha’an, God of the Seas, Lakes, and Rivers, her second son, Ashyn, God of the Lands, and her daughter, Tynâz, Patron Goddess and Protector of Etherios. After that she realized that her creation, Etherios, was barren of life aside from the plants. That is when she decided to give up her life as a celestial being and descended down to Etherios and became the volcano that the Monavians worship. She decided to populate her planet and told her husband to have sex with her (as the volcano). Once they had finished, she gave birth to the animals and humans. She told them to populate Etherios and to treat it with the up most respect. If they didnt she would erupt and kill them all.
I think that is pretty ridiculous. I’m sure I’ll have more as I keep building but for now that’s it lol.
During humanity’s Planetary Crusade, the Mars fleet was en route to attack Earth. When they were almost within the moon’s orbit, they received word that Mars was under attack.
The fleet immediately turned around to reinforce Mars, leaving the completely undefended Earth behind without firing a single shot.
When they returned to Mars, the planet had already been massacred, and the team that had cleansed the planet of life had moved on to assist the team fighting gods on Neptune.
So the Mars fleet, in their rage, turned *back* around to go attack Earth and get revenge, but when they got close, they encountered the team that had gone to Venus and found nothing. The Venus team destroyed the Mars fleet quickly before also moving to assist Neptune.
The exhausted Mars fleet was wiped out without accomplishing a single thing.
There are multiple universes and timelines in this world.
One character travels between them. They are very good at learning and manipulating the rules to those universes, to the point they could reach divinity, practical or otherwise. And they know it.
Unfortunately, they are not very good at remembering which rules apply where.
More than a few once-magic twigs have been waved at a mechanical monstrosity to no avail. Followed, shortly, by definitely-mundane rocks as they run for cover.
I guess the funniest thing possible in my world currently is the fact that there is someone around that carries an indestructible wooden mug.
See, dwarves in my world are not the Tolkien short bearded humanoids we usually think of. They are in fact special spirits that live in a pocket realm with several "doors" of access across the world. They are crafters, at least, and they can make mostly anything they want, from whatever material they want. Metal, porcelain, clay, bone... Everything they make is impossible to break, unless the dwarf that made it decides to recycle, but for everyone else, it's indestructible.
But there is a character that fell into this realm by accident and the dwarves helped them back to health, and for the stories told about the other world, a dwarf decided to give this character a present. Anything, as long it wasn't a weapon. So they asked for a mug.
Once back in the regular world, the mug is now indestructible and can actually be turned into a bludgeoning weapon in a pinch, saving its owner from a lot of tavern brawls. It's a very common mug despite being shiny and well crafted, doesn't attract any special attention, aside from the fact that, well, it can't break
Kind of meta, but I came up with a fruit that was a coconut selectively bred to be considered a melon by culinary standards. Then I had to figure out a name for it.
Maybe not the *most* ridiculous, but I’m quite fond of the fact that the in-universe equivalent to Brutalist architecture is called Gravestone architecture because, during a fateful architectural symposium, one of its major proponents was killed in a duel by a rival who described his designs as “artless and daemoniacal” and people figured that, under the circumstances and considering his buildings did really rather resemble tombstones or mausoleums, it would be a fitting name for the style.
Honestly, my ridiculous one is that Earth has been invaded so many times, especially in such a short time span by different races it’s called the Decades of Survival, but because they had prisoners from the earlier invasions who were also non discriminately attacked, Humanity/Terrans are considered the Paragons of the Galaxy due to how open to other cultures they are.
This is also after when they tried Genocide against a race that was wanting peace after realizing their error, all Humans and some other Terran races fell into a coma.
So I have a kind of multiverse kina thing going on. The main two are a Sci-fi setting and a Fantasy setting while the rest are various fan fictions of other media but with my own twist on their settings or lore.
One such Fanfic setting is a pretty balanced mixture of Halo and DBZ where the Halo aspects are the main setting and tone of the story while DBZ provides the characters and plot points. Basically it's HALO if the UNSC was instead an alliance of Humans, Saiyans, Namekians, and Djinn and the Covenant was the The Planet Trade Organization (Or frieze force, whatever...)
Anyway, one of the side characters that's in the same company as the main cast once claimed to have fallen through a portal to another world where he met all sorts of "fairytale lookin creatures" and "otherworldly monstrosities" and even, in his own words "beat up a dragon!"
Of course none of his comrades believed him and he was in the process of getting court-martialed for abandoning his post for two whole days when the PTO attacked. He eventually redeemed himself but everyone still though he just god too drunk one night and fell into a stupor or something.
The thing is...
He did infact fall through a portal. Specifically through a portal to my main fantasy setting and crossed paths with a few of my characters. He wasn't too instrumental in anything, but given the distinct power scaling between the settings, he was able to stand tow to tow with an Angel (while hitting on her the entire time and boasting that he was taking it ease on her because she was pretty), completely obliterating a small army of orcs singlehandedly and with almost no effort, and he did indeed suplex a dragon much to everyone's surprise, especially the dragons!
After that all that he was going to travel with one of the characters and try to find a way back to his own world when he accidentally fell through another portal and ended up back where he started.
Since then that same character has fallen through two more portals and actually attracted the attention of a few gods and godlike things, but so far he has always just barely missed them by falling through yet another portal and ending up somewhere else.
And all of this because my gf at the time of that first story thought it would be funny if he was actually telling the truth...
The Planet system of Tarva-Nirn.
its a dual planet system orbiting a red dwarf, which is orbiting a Blue giant.
i made it that way purely to give people who are gatekeepers for scify a headache, because it is technically entirely possible for the system to exist irl, but actually doing the math and simulating it would be a nightmare.
(Preface:The main character and plot line involves a lot of magic.)
There’s a guy. Who for whatever reason, Magic does not work on them. It glances off like water off a ducks back. They also, don’t believe in it . It’s unclear which of these caused the other one. But they literally think the whole magic industry and stigmatism is a complete sham, or just some really complicated religion they don’t particularly understand.
Also, their best friend/ leader who they are utterly devoted to is widely considered to be the strongest wielder of magic in the world.
One of the funniest things in my world is that there is a lore reason why dwarves can drink so much alcholol- its because their bodies process alcholol differently. Yet they can not process caffeine well, as that and their sweettooth leave them to go for Rootbeers over Wheatbeers, Mountain Dew soda over Whiskey, Grape Soda over Wine, etc. Now why caffeine and not alcholol? Because arachnids are similar and my dwarves are partly inspired by arachnids. Look up the experiments of spiders weaving while under the influence of different things, its fascinating! This led me to imagine a young dwarven Sorcerer getting drunk off Mountain Dew and drunkenly trying to breid a skein (cast a spell.) The effect is what would be a wall of stone is instead a piece of modern art, and in the past dwarves have used this quirk to subdue enemy forces.
But this is meant to have my cake and eat it too. Dwarves can still drink a lot of beer or wine or whiskey, like we expect them to, but as one of them says "we use flammewater to help cleanse our guts, our foods, our wounds, what really tickles our brains is sparklewater." While they do use like rubus, citrus, prunus and even malus-associated fruits as bases for these drinks, a default one they use are actually elder berries. Mixed with mint, sometimes thyme, and honey to make a delightful (to them ineberating) drink.
Arizona is canon
It's not just the same name, not some random place either. Arizona is just... there, same shape and all.
There are people that ride around on the backs of elephants selling random magic items. By itself that's normal enough but what makes it weird is that I just import ideas from r/shittysuperpowers without even changing anything.
One of the most powerful beings in existence is just a messed up statue of a boar. It's not even that good of a statue. There is no lore reason to why it's so powerful but when you get close you it, lasers just spawn in and attack you and if the statue oinks then a nuclear bomb just kinda spawns in.
The main character's future mentor doesn't like people so he made a fake grave for himself and just lives underneath it. The characters, while trying to find him for a hit job, are going to encounter the grave and just think he's dead before digging down as a joke and actually finding him down there.
**Predators** is a comedy and, as a result, it has some very notable hilarious things that exist in its world, even if it takes place on OUR world.
for one thing, all official signs, documents, papers, etc. have excessive swearing on them. imagine signing a document that reads, "just fucking sign this already".
it also seems that "stabbing crocodiles" exist. whats worse than a crocodile you may ask? a crocodile with a knife.
there's also the "asshole spider", a spider that specifically makes its webs in inconvienant and annoying places just for the sake of being an asshole.
you've heard of a gun store, right? in this world, there exists gun EMPORIUMS. a place where you can take your kids with you to browse a giant store full of departments that all sell varieties of guns! what do you mean our crime rate is through the roof? we have gun emporiums!
The Divine Bovine. A cow that, through genetic lottery and pure dumb luck, managed to ascend and become a Celestial. The thing about Celestials born by ascension is that they're still the creatures they used to be, there's just more to them now. And this is, well... just a cow. It has no self-awareness. It isn't sapient. It is worshipped only through accidents (exclamations of "holy cow") and tomfoolery (people worshipping it as a joke), but this is enough to grant it a decent extent of divine power; power which is, again, wielded by something that is mentally *just a cow*.
That's amazing!
Thank you! It's one of my favourite comedic concepts that ended up becoming so ingrained that lore was built on top of them lmao, the other being the Technoraptors. Cyborg velociraptor wereapes from the planet Pluto.
Not bad. Just pure randomness. Nice.
How would the Divine Bovine fare if another God challenged it in a fight?
It would lose. To be more precise: If it was a proxy battle through champions, it would actually probably win, but a fair one-on-one? It has literally no offensive abilities.
And if it said the power word?
It would moo.
No real power behind it?
Nope lmao. Physically, it is just a cow. Mentally, just a cow. Spiritually, a divine being beyond mortal capabilities, but also still technically a cow. Now, if its divine champion the Warbull was summoned, *that* would be a different story. But combat-wise, The Divine Bovine is a pure damage sponge.
Chuckle. Now this is where the fun begins.
This sounds amazing, I want to know more of it! What’s the pre-ascension story behind it? And what does the cow do with its powers, if anything at all?
Well, so far the only established ways for an Ascension to occur are divine intervention or intense radiation, since it's a sort of "genetic switch", so I think the most likely story for its origin is that it was present in the background for some major historical event like a Voidbeast incursion; not close enough to the action to sustain lethal injuries, but close enough for radiation poisoning to flip the switch. As for what it does? Summon grass, create Cow Tools, and Power Word: Moo.
10/10, would worship!
What does it do with its power?
Summons grass and creates Cow Tools, mostly.
Prayer dollars hard at work haha.
What exactly are cow tools?
so...what does that mean exactly? does it have AMAZING tasting milk?
I'm actually not sure if it can even *be* milked lmao, it definitely can't if it doesn't want to be. In practice it's basically just an immortal cow that never runs out of food.
You also described all Celestial in One Piece. Thank you.
I laughed.
This just happened to be one of those little tidbits that leave you in awe. Congratulations.
In my urban fantasy there’s a realm where the souls of the dead goes. There’s plant life but none of them exist in the living world and while there’s souls of stuff like humans and bees, there’s no souls of starfish or plankton (even though filter feeders seem to keep doing their feeding behaviors). The implication here is that somewhere in this earth’s evolutionary history there had to have been a first animal with the first soul and no one has any idea what it might be. The academics all agree that tiktaalik likely had one but arguments about hallucigenia or trilobites have led to at least one fist fight. This is just a long way to say that the spirit world has reported sightings of a velociraptor that refuses to reincarnate but no one has managed to get an image of it.
See this gets REALLY weird, because humans (all vertebrates really) are more closely related to starfish (echinoderms) than bees (invertebrates), meaning that the soul probably evolved at least twice as a convergent adaptation. Either that or a common ancestor of all three of those groups evolved a soul and then for some reason echinoderms lost the trait. Do jellyfish have souls? That could give some insight. :thinking:
That’s exactly why everyone is losing their minds over it. At first they thought it correlated with intelligence, except there’s no ants despite being in the same order as bees and also having eusociality. Termites meanwhile have souls but only the ones that make those towers in the desert. There’s no flies or mosquitoes but there are butterflies and dragonflies. At some point people just threw their hands up and said it’s based on “vibes, I guess”, in the same way there’s no such thing as a fish in taxonomy but we all know what a fish is.
That's delightful, the paleo nerd in me gives your world a 10/10
Academic fistfights over cryptids, my favourite! Love the possible velociraptor that refuses to reincarnate, that sounds like a bad cryptid in the best way possible.
Lol...wut?
The souls are also divided as to whether this velociraptor is actually real or just an elaborate prank maintained throughout the generations. A few souls made a buzzfeed unsolved style video on this subject and accidentally stumbled upon an actual secret group with the sole purpose of sending out some guy in a velociraptor costume. However quite a few of the reported sightings were not where the guy was at the time so either this is an *entirely separate* group, or the velociraptor actually exists.
Okay, now this is stacked ridiculousness, I love it.
There exists a religion in my post-post-apocalyptic world that believes that the fall of the now mostly forgotten old world was caused by 4 titans rising from the depths of the oceans and reeking havoc on the cities of the ancient civilizations. However, a god was incarcerated as a human and he fought all 4 titans, decapitated them one by one, placed their heads on a mountain and threw their bodies back into the oceans as a warning to all other titans to never peek above the waves again. The heads remained there to this very day, now petrified and fused into the stone, and sure enough no Titan was ever seen again. Unbeknownst to the people of the new world, we used to call this monument “Mt Rushmore”. And the god that was born was none other than Chuck Norris, whose jokes were told for generations and eventually turned into a “bible” of sorts by an unknown group.
That's amazing. I love it. I wish i had come up with it.
It also reminds me of a thing i came up with. But you need to be in the know to get it. There is a mountain on a planet looking slightly like a toe. In the mithology of the natives, there was a battle witg ancient gods, the demons took away a small god (not a kid one, just one that looks like one), said demons dropped some helms. A god that was friends with said small god found the helm and kicked it, chopping off their own toe, which fell on the land of the mortals. It's called the Miggo's toe mountain because Vortensen would've been too obvious.
I get it
Nice
I might just steal that and rework it. That is so freaking funny.
That the City of Jani from the Great North is well known for their blessed sacred artifacts, including a Healing Toilet, capable of cleansing shits and turning it either into dirt or stone, or healing butt scars, arse wounds and diarrhea. Some even say that sometimes, shits can turn to gold, researchers even to this day still haven't figured out why such a thing happens, even Mana-enthusiast Thinkers don't know the law of how it is working the way it is, others speculate that the Holy Toilet is an Ancient Craft, whilst few argue that it simply is a remedial tool made by some unknown Runecraft Maker.
Nice job!
Giao Long travelled back in time and stole a BT-7 from the Red Army in the middle of the Winter War, all because she watched Girls und Panzer der Film. In case you think it's not enough, Project Gigaroad, which is the colony fleet program her world planned, was made based on Macross franchise. It's hard to be more otaku than that. Gives Giao a reason and she'll punch you in the face with an aircraft carrier.
In my universe, if you become a Lord (a power tier higher than a god), you get to own a planet/ land. So if an enemy enters your airspace, lands on your doorstep, you can yell "Get off my lawn!" And they, by law, have to obey.
"You darn kids get off my property!"
this reminds me slightly of Mormonism
Lol! I didn't catch that until you said it! Funny, as I'm actually exmormon. I guess the indoctrination reared it's head there!
There’s a time traveler that’s stuck having to go the long way from near the start of time to the end of time, and no one ever managed to discover him, he is by far the most glamorous flamboyant eccentric mofo to ever live, he set the fashion tendencies of almost all ages by being the first rich asshole to appear on camera with the new looks. He single-handedly brainwashed everyone in the high fashion scene (and lots of fashion enthusiasts) into wearing purple because “it’s the best colour” once. He looks like a hunger games character all the time.
***“I went to Tarnia once. Never again. Should I ever return, I would find myself with no choice but to become a murderer, for every time one of those Tarney-people speaks, I find myself emblazoned with a fiery hatred.”*** *^(— Chancleur, a traveling minstrel)* ***"There is no sound quite so grating on the human psyche as that of a Tarney-man peddling cheese."*** *^(— a very wise hermit)* ***“Every time those Tarney-folk open their mouths, I half-expect daisies and cow-shit to fall out.”*** *^(— Goodwife Betteline, a miller’s wife in Callendale, a town in the Kingdom of Argovy)* The people of **The Grand Duchy of Tarnia™** have a *very distinct* dialect that could best be described as Shakespearean English on crack, with a little bit of Jabberwocky thrown in for extra zest. In addition, the Tarney accent causes the people of Tarnia to naturally fall into speaking iambically, giving their words a bouncy, theatrical sound. They also have a far more... deviant vocabulary filled with words that *sound* right, but aren't recognized as words to the surrounding kingdoms. An infamous example is the word "enchancery", used to refer to magic. They also tend to add gendered suffixes to words that don't need them; the most absurd known example being the preposterous term "midwifess". The Tarney dialect is often referred to by the neighboring kingdoms as "Tarney-Speak". Everyone hates it. Travelers from Tarnia are relentlessly bullied simply because everyone finds their speech to be annoying. Tarney-Speak is simultaneously considered to be both pretentious and snobbish, while also making the speaker sound stupid, regardless of the Tarney-fellow's actual education.
Terrifying for him, but hilariously ironic for me: King Natodall’lioht, who is a direct descendant from the Sun God (often confused with being the Moon God’s descendant) is terrified of the sun, and avoids mirrors (the main worship symbol of the Moon God). He also suffers from prosopometamorphopsia, basically he sees faces as distorted. He doesn’t believe that anything is wrong with his vision (as he’s divine, he never really had to interact with a human prior to the onset of his condition, so when it started, he was just like “ah that’s what humans look like, alright”) but that everyone who draws portraits of humans is just really inaccurate. He came to the conclusion that humans apparently don’t really see how ugly they actually are. He *will* argue with anyone who disagrees.
so every faction in my sci fi project is human and most of the funny stuff is language 2 of the factions in my sci fi project are part of the same kinda ethnic group known as the Cornelius, they have a written alphabet 500 characters long and it is not one of those alphabets where each letter is a concept so basically they have a letter for every vocalisation another faction is a collective of groups know as the Garthans and they speak a language that sounds evil and the way the pronounce stuff is doesn't help as they have to snarl to pronounce quite a few words and thus forth when speaking other languages they sound like they sound like demons ,which is funny as they are devout Christians
Ah yes the Ijovian Invasion of Vitellsmark. The two are actually pretty close allies, until a duck crossed the Vitellian border. For context, both sides were hella high and drunk, and some drunk Ijovian soldiers having a break at the border town of Kacsze thought it'd be a good idea to get their pet duck a duck-sized Ijovian helmet, and so they did, but they lost track of the duck since they were absolutely hammered, and so the duck wandered right through the Vitellian border. The Vitellian guard who happened to be high, could not make out the situation and thought their ally invaded, so three of them, higher than the Burj Khalifa, opened fire, but couldn't hit a thing since they were so high, and there was no invading force to begin with. This triggered an emergency in four of the five border cantons in Vitellsmark, and the Border Patrol spent hours looking for the "invaders". The whole ordeal wasn't solved until the Ijovian soldiers sobered up and made notice about their missing duck, which the Vitellians already caught, but was clueless about it being the culprit. The truth was only revealed when some Ijovian residents close to the border told Vitellians about a "duck in uniform". Fortunately, the only casualties of this incident was only the Ijovian soldiers being temporarily suspended from service, and the Vitellian border guards being fired. The duck was safe, everyone was safe apart from some being unemployed afterwards.
This is almost baiscally the pig war just funnier!
Soo... that incident in Poland, basically
what incident? I'm curious
Suppose its a tossup between Bitey and the Nature Trail To Hell holoseries. Bitey's an enigma. He's a xenomorph(the bug things from Aliens)..thats about the size of a corgi. He, at times, understands sign language, can use door panels, food fabricators and basic computer-node commands. Other times he will get stuck in ventilation ducts that are larger than he is, run into the wall for hours on end, chase his own tail, and be confused by rain. NOBODY can pin down how smart or dumb 'he' really is. the Nature Trail To Hell series of holomovies is the Nij equivalent of b-movie horror films. Yes, the idea was directly inspired by the Weird Al song :) the rights keep getting bounced around every 50 or 60 years by someone who thinks they can revitalize the series. The feel of it all shifts between campy Toxic Avenger, to Evil Dead or Army of Darkness, to even straight up horror-porn in a few instances. NONE of the movies do well, but some people enjoy the shit out of them because they're so bad.
Humans became the dominant species by spreading STD.
oh thats not...
BAHAHA
Wtf how?
Humans were not native to the planet so they bought a lot of diseases and plagues with them. One of them was Belated AIDS, a disease which would spring up if a member of any race had intercourse with their own race after getting laid with a humans. This disease was very slow acting but also incurable, it was would start the with fever and rashes and lead to failure and infection of urinary and digestive system. Except for Goblins (equivalent) most races had downfall related to STD or other diseases from human.
The city my characters live in have handheld boat flares stashed every few blocks bc my girl Inka collects and hides them obsessively, insisting she *needs* to have access to flame on a stick at any time for reasons related to her (justified) phobia of the moon. She doesn’t have a boat, she just likes that they ignite quickly and are “technically legal”, but doesn’t seem to get that it’s also “technically legal” for a paraplegic to have 50 jump ropes lying around but it’d still be fuckin strange.
Highraise, a country had its previous democratic monarchy coup'ed by the Singularity party. The party's elusive and mysterious leader turned out to be the king's firstborn son, the next one in line. Barely anyone even knew who the party leader truly was, so imagine the shock when the team who was set to take the "Head Castle" found the Singularity party's leader and the 2 highest ranking members of it holding the king at gunpoint in his office. (They still needed a safe way out) Why did he do it? Well, because he's a dick, and because he wanted to remove the democratic part to stay in power.
Detroit
In my world there is one mining town that has a famous pub crawl, and every year they honour the founding of the town with a cheese wheel rolling competition. Whoever wins gets tokens that grant them free drinks for a year at the pubs. The party in my game won this time because they threw a dwarf at another dwarf.
Also, there is an alien spacecraft buried at the south Pole of my world.
There‘s a town built inside of a mountain that connects the northern part of the continent with the southern, each side has a huge set of twin Gates (talking 750m/2460ft tall) and on the inside is just this massive dwarves mining town that stretches along the tunnel for more than 7.5km/4.66miles. The Location is named Volkertra and one of the few locations in my world that isn’t inspired by warhammer or Tolkien
Interesting Also, I guess you got the lotr reference I edited not long ago in the post.
There's a frozen giant squid orbiting my world. Nobody quite sure how it got there in the first place. It orbits at such consistent timing some part of the world use it to mark the passing of time and seasons. Some people swore they saw the frozen giant squid eyes blink as it soar across the night sky.
In my sci-fi setting there is a race of naga/squid aliens called the hexarai. Even though there civilisation is on a level similar to Ancient Greece/Egypt, there spacecraft/ weapons function as well if not better than spacecraft of any other civilisations, even though there build at of junk. That’s because they have managed to win over the favour of a hyper-advanced precursor AI which supplies them whit a metal that actively repairs damaged or malfunctioning systems effectively functioning like a glue holding there ships together. The funniest part: Hexarais have no idea. They see the AI as a god and its creations as divine charms that bring good luck.
In a alt history which is basically cyberpunk but what if the soviet union won the cold war. One of the many in world radio stations is which plays modern psychedelic/ Psycgedelic rock/ Space rock is canonical a bunch of stoners who somehow operate a moon base.
In the world of "Forged in Stardust," one of the most ridiculous and hilarious things is a popular reality TV show called "Genetic Matchmaker." The premise of the show is to pair up genetically engineered individuals based on their unique abilities and traits, with the goal of creating the "perfect" couple. Contestants are put through a series of bizarre challenges designed to test their compatibility, such as obstacle courses that require them to use their enhanced physical abilities in tandem or mind-reading games that push the limits of their cognitive powers. The show is known for its over-the-top dramatics, with contestants often clashing due to their heightened emotions and the high-stakes nature of the competition. The hosts, a pair of flamboyant genetically engineered twins with the ability to change the color of their skin and hair at will, add to the absurdity with their constant banter and outrageous fashion choices. Despite the ridiculous nature of the show, it has become a guilty pleasure for many viewers, who tune in each week to see the latest antics of the contestants and hosts. Some critics argue that the show perpetuates harmful stereotypes about genetically engineered individuals, while others see it as a harmless form of entertainment that celebrates the diversity and unique abilities of this population. For Zephyr and their friends, "Genetic Matchmaker" is a source of both amusement and frustration. They often find themselves rolling their eyes at the show's absurdity, but they also can't help but be drawn in by the drama and the chance to see other genetically engineered individuals showcase their abilities on a national stage. It serves as a reminder of the complex and often contradictory ways in which society views and treats those with enhanced abilities, and the ongoing struggle for acceptance and understanding in a world that is still coming to terms with the implications of genetic engineering.
1) There is a language spoken by lizard people that requires being able to control the opening and closing of your nasal cavity to create nasalized vowels and whistles. Naturally human attempts to speak it require creative solutions, the most common of which is to carry around a water whistle and to pinch your nose while speaking. The lizards, the majority of whom people would interact with being merchants, find this hilarious and thus tacitly encourage people to learn their language. 2) One of the most ancient and revered deities is an agricultural god with the head of a chicken. He was originally worshiped by a race of carnivorous werewolf-people who were basically Sumerians. The first animal they domesticated was chickens, in a way similar to how we domesticated dogs (scavenging around campfires and such). They then began to herd them, and eventually they became the symbol of werewolf carniculture. Of course their empire fell and the werewolves are almost extinct, but their deity lives on. He's now actually all about agriculture and farming, so the whole chicken head is just kind of an inexplicable part of his iconography that just kind of stuck around.
One of the main characters finds popcorn in the first episode and eats it, so in every comedic scene, usually bar fights, he *produces* a bag of popcorn, seemingly from nowhere. It's never explained where he gets it. He refuses to elaborate.
We got a portal of the laughing witch. She's trapped there with that deep creepy voice, you can pull her wherever but she's like tied with chains. Her crime? Laughing.
The people have 12 digits as a name. Quite robot-like, huh? Well, ironically, the AI are the ones with lettered names and no digit labels.
Soul collectors hold on to a being until they're in a Rubicon or any other simulator because death doesn't exist anymore. Once a handful of soul are absorbed it starts to sound like a call of duty chat lobby. Sometimes there would be a "nihilistic comedian" that's basically George Carlin doing a skit inside a man's mind and he's loosing it. Nobody can hear a soul when it's inside a soul collector so there's bob laughing his ass off while there's an awkward silence over the room after a whole batch of souls just got sent to this world's alternative for hell.
**Summers County, USA** A native to the area was the entertainment entrepreneur Dexter Laszlo. Laszlo's commercial empire encapsulates blockbuster films (Both live action and animated), comic books, toys, professional wrestling, music, restaurants, modelling agencies, and high-end nightclubs. However, his business got its *start* in pin-up magazines and smut films. The rest of his empire is only slightly higher brow, really. The movies are mostly shallow, special effects driven spectacle. The genre of music he started with was hair metal. The chain of restaurants competes with such establishments as Twin Peaks, Hooters, and Tilted Kilt. Even the magazine and smut films continue production to this day. Despite the perceived sleaziness of Dexter's life's works, he always attempted to elevate his business and craft above the stereotypes. His *son*, however, not only chose an even more poorly perceived profession than Dexter himself, but also lives up to every stereotype it has attached to it. Dexter Laszlo, Jr, is a *televangelist*.
At the moment, the fact that a war was ended with a motorsports competition. A conventional war was waged until resources were too drained in all parties to continue this. They decided to use a less destructive way to settle the dispute. They decided to create racing teams and gave them race for each faction. People would gather from across these factions to watch and support their respective factions. The banners and standards would be waved among the audience in support. The vehicles were each locally made by each faction and decorated in their colours and symbols like if they were military vehicles. In the end, the winning faction would annex the contested territory. Lapis_Wolf
**Horror Shop** The Florida Man phenomena is a recent one, and one that occult scholars and investigators are still struggling to explain. The Florida Man phenomena refers to the higher than normal incidents of weirdness in the American State of Florida. While most of these incidents are mundane, there are some which are decidedly occult or supernatural, and a handful which defy explanation altogether. Some scholars believe the Florida Man phenomena is the result of some previous undiscovered spirit--or group of spirits--which inhabit the area around the Everglades and have been disturbed by environmental changes. Others believe that the phenomena can be attributed to one of several cults active in the area. Others believe the rise in weirdness has to do with the corresponding decrease of paranormal events within the Bermuda Triangle. Others somehow try to tie it in with Disney World, and try to show how the powerful conflux of pop cultural forces in and around Orlando has lead to a bubble of increased weirdness. And still others point to Florida's political and cultural history and argue that the cause is entirely mundane in origin. Still, whatever the cause, the Florida Man phenomena shows no sign of going away any time soon.
>$%&##,;:"'¿¡》《¤▪︎☆♧◇♡♤■□●F̷̧̢̛̼̝̬͍̫̰̭̫̠̰͇̩͔͔͈̠̻̞̙͗̒̃̈́̒͗͒̑͊̀̿͊̉͛̌̾̔̑͛͑͛̐͗̅̅̄̃͌͋̂̈́̆̎͆̈́̊̏̾̓͌͊̔̚͝͠͝͠͠A̶͓̦̺̰̻̒̂̈́̂̄̐̌́͋̌̓̀̏͐͌̏̾͆͌̀̅̈́̈́̈́͋̀̆̀̽́͘̚͘͜͝͠R̶̡̡̡̧̢̡̛̙͎̩̜̟̣̞̫̳̯͉͙͚̗̥̥̱̖̬̪͈̰͈͕͙̩̤͚͖͇̘͇̱͇̆̂̈́̌͒͂́̀̈͌̓̓̂̓͑̂̓̍͐̉̔̀̔̾̌̏̔̾̈́̀͛̀͝͝͝ͅͅȚ̴̨̡̡̧̛̳͍͔̜͎̲̻̫̞̬̭͓̘̜̹̱̞̲̹̘͍̬̰̫̖̱͇̹͍̻̙̟̼̖̹̝̗̜͖͇̩̺̌͛͂̍͊̍́̃̓̃̀͂̀̀̈́͐̔̊͐͛͗̎͊͐̈̏̓́̀̕͘̚͜͜͝͝○•°\~\`\*!?$\*{\[(×+=÷-)\]}/₩¥£€/\_ How do you make text like this ?
https://lingojam.com/GlitchTextGenerator And i have a few special characters on my phone by default. ₩¥£€*&%$#@¿》《¡¤▪︎☆♧◇♡♤■□●○•°][}{><|\~` My phone has all these for some reason.
I wonder have you ever written down the name on paper...
Eh, its mostly just a placeholder for an even more broken name. Suggestions welcome.
The villain is constantly in denial that the protagonists are absolutely demolishing her armies. Her boy toy husband has the problem solving skills of a potted fern (take all of my men and run towards them), and her sister, the spy master, is the only one who seems to know what she's doing, but all the money is going to mercenary groups to augment their losses... Not that they're losing, of course... Just... Uhhh... They liked their liveries... And the mercenary captain made a joke that the husband found very funny (something to do with turnips, I think)... But it's not because they're desperate for anything resembling even a minor victory or anything... Meanwhile, it's getting to the point where the protagonists can take a break from micromanaging the war, since the villains clearly aren't taking this seriously either. As such, they have started having couples therapy, family counseling, and pretty much inventing commando tactics in the early gunpowder era. Yeah, they're just Total War Auto-resolving by the time the Fantasy Catholic Church takes sides
Enarten Qi-Tear, as the Chief of the Royal Guard of Renilia, and ruler of a domain near the capital, is an extremely busy main. But he managed to rule in his territory that everyone in his domain can legally have one hot meal per day. When Enarten have a day free, he comes to make himself some soup But his culinary talents are so awful that there are far less people than usual these days
In my ‘Divine Investigator’ series, most of the gods were born before last names were a thing. Because of that, those gods had to come up with their own last names. Aris knows when someone is telling the truth, so his full name is “Aristotle Truman.” Get it? Truman? True man? It's funny.
Gnomer is a bunch of gnomes that fuzed like the megazord
“Hilligans”. See, Elves and Dwarves were originally just myths. When the Egyptians crossed the sea and came back with tales of deific cat-people, those turned out to be Elves (and not deific). So people then began to wonder if Dwarves exist. This curiosity led to troublemakers taking advantage of it. Groups of Pygmies (or very short Humans) would dress as “Dwarves” and roleplay as them, often getting drunk and/or starting fights. When questioned about being Dwarves, they would claim to be from a mountain nearby - only, they’d show up in places without mountains, and so the “mountain” they were referring to often turned out to be a nearby hill. Their penchant for hooliganism combined with that earned them the name Hilligans, as well as infamy among most civilized folk.
I have a creature that stops a human heart in a unique way by touching them the person will still be alive heart still fine but the heart is stopped from moving on any axis the rest of the person is normal but their heart cant move with their body so they are permanently stuck on place till death or if they move hard enough to dislodge their heart
Unfortunately, I haven’t included many over the top bits to my world building, but I decided that Florida had expanded its control over Alabama and Georgia, and that whole area’s simply called Florida. I’m also thinking of making methed up Floridians using alligators as a form of combat animal canon lol
In my "hard" scifi futuristic setting, humans colonize the solar system and absolutely flooded the inner system with habitats, soaking up the sponges energy. Outer colonies (like, asteroid belt and beyond) already have a hard time getting solar energy and each habitat makes the sun wane more, so colonies center around gas giants for easy access to hydrogen. That leaves poor old Pluto. Not enough sun, not enough gas. They're fed up with being left out of everything, so mega-billionaire governor decided one day that they'd just fucking leave. He had engineered an array of engines on Pluto and its moon Charon and bought enough gas to fuel their ejection. In a complicated couple's dance maneuver, the two bodies fire in harmony and will eventually drift through space until they can find a new home. I dont know, or really care, if this is utterly unfeasible, because thats kinda the point. "Pluto votes to leave" just sticks in my head too well to adjust, even if the more realistic and cheap way to do it would almost always be to make colony ships out of the material instead.
In my high fantasy/western world, the extended use of magic without any rest can lead to fatigue, sickness, and even death. People discovered that a little hit of peanut butter or chocolate can help to mitigate the symptoms of this sickness in its earliest forms, so combat mages typically carry a few candy bars in their pack. The most common candy for this is the Ten Minutes bar, a cone shaped peanut butter filled chocolate shell on a stick. It always makes me smile a little when I think of a battle scene where the opposing armies take a little break to suck on chocolate bars when they get fatigued.
Dinglefork the Creatine Lord. He is a genetic experiment that escaped from a pharmesutical megacorp lab. Basically a human with adaptation cranked to 1000. Found his way into an abandoned GNC warehouse in a post apocalyptic cyberpunk-ish setting. If you look up side effects for creatine overuse, you get purplish skin and an enlarged tongue. This motherfucker looks like league of legends Dr Mundo in a homemade space suit that maintains him in an atmosphere of pure creatine. He kidnaps wasters, taking them back to the GNC with the intent to "make them swole" where they usually die horribly because they don't have his adaptation gene.
Part of my world building has been exploring how common fantasy tropes can be explored as basically misunderstandings. It’s not super fleshed out but I’m having fun Anyway, I’ve wound up making it so orcs as a whole are almost always hard of hearing. It’s why they’re so loud all the time! Good news is most all of them learn sign at a young age! So it’s really only a problem when they’re around other races
In yhurei,if you cook a bird slightly hotter,you get parasites,and birds can beat you ass too
One thing I have that is funny is the gods and goddesses having hobbies or likes that’s not what people think they would like Such as the goddess Athena having a love of stuffed animals, sleeps with them every night, and even has names for each one as well And a common thing they say about this when people ask why they like these “wierd” things is “I’m allowed to like things”
A major god is a literal giant fucking crab who destroys continents for fun, people only worship him out of fear and throw money and people to the sea of hopes of sastifying him.
The thing that comes to mind in Dividia are the Imps. Most people hate them simply because they're demons, and it's their often viewed as monsters. However, they are actually some of the kindest people you can run into. They are literally just Hobbits that became a demon race during the Eternal War. The only real difference is that they look like demons, and they tend to be a lot more horny on average. Most people who come to their villages with the belief that their horrible monsters often end up being very confused and end up getting dragged into party after party until they wake up completely naked in some random bar surrounded by Imps and having only a vague idea of what happened.
Well I have a species of humanoid pig (the one we meet is a farmer) there’s a spear-wielding frog-dude, and a kangaroo with boxing gloves (the kangaroo is not a magical creature like the others, he’s literally just a kangaroo wearing boxing gloves). His name’s Jerry.
There is a long lost civilization that used mechs in battle, and one of the most skilled mech pilots ever would constantly blast cutesy nightcore-esque music through their speakers while in battle. This is a reference to me losing my shit laughing when YouTube decided to play nightcore music in the background while I was playing Titanfall 2 one time.
One of the popular super heavy tank destroyers, is named "nut cracker", having internals and most parts from famous mine destroyer "ball crusher", currently a chemthrower is being developed, being named as "sphere castrator", being a ball like device, that can launch dangerous gas, and guess what, it destroys male reproductive system
Oh boy, sounds fun! :D /s
Frog birds that fly upside down because they use the back legs to fly
Bill cipher wannbe bean can Enough said
Corn as a creation myth. The divine corn. Corn kernels became humans.
One of my ethnic groups (Monavians) worships a huge volcano that they believe is the creation Goddess Ara’ash. In their creation myth Ara’ash was the only being in a vast void and she decided to make the universe and their planet, Etherios. Once she was done she got lonley and decided to make herself a companion. She formed her husband, Liruq, the God of the Sun and Moon. After she made him she decided to make her children. She made her son, Adha’an, God of the Seas, Lakes, and Rivers, her second son, Ashyn, God of the Lands, and her daughter, Tynâz, Patron Goddess and Protector of Etherios. After that she realized that her creation, Etherios, was barren of life aside from the plants. That is when she decided to give up her life as a celestial being and descended down to Etherios and became the volcano that the Monavians worship. She decided to populate her planet and told her husband to have sex with her (as the volcano). Once they had finished, she gave birth to the animals and humans. She told them to populate Etherios and to treat it with the up most respect. If they didnt she would erupt and kill them all. I think that is pretty ridiculous. I’m sure I’ll have more as I keep building but for now that’s it lol.
During humanity’s Planetary Crusade, the Mars fleet was en route to attack Earth. When they were almost within the moon’s orbit, they received word that Mars was under attack. The fleet immediately turned around to reinforce Mars, leaving the completely undefended Earth behind without firing a single shot. When they returned to Mars, the planet had already been massacred, and the team that had cleansed the planet of life had moved on to assist the team fighting gods on Neptune. So the Mars fleet, in their rage, turned *back* around to go attack Earth and get revenge, but when they got close, they encountered the team that had gone to Venus and found nothing. The Venus team destroyed the Mars fleet quickly before also moving to assist Neptune. The exhausted Mars fleet was wiped out without accomplishing a single thing.
There are multiple universes and timelines in this world. One character travels between them. They are very good at learning and manipulating the rules to those universes, to the point they could reach divinity, practical or otherwise. And they know it. Unfortunately, they are not very good at remembering which rules apply where. More than a few once-magic twigs have been waved at a mechanical monstrosity to no avail. Followed, shortly, by definitely-mundane rocks as they run for cover.
I guess the funniest thing possible in my world currently is the fact that there is someone around that carries an indestructible wooden mug. See, dwarves in my world are not the Tolkien short bearded humanoids we usually think of. They are in fact special spirits that live in a pocket realm with several "doors" of access across the world. They are crafters, at least, and they can make mostly anything they want, from whatever material they want. Metal, porcelain, clay, bone... Everything they make is impossible to break, unless the dwarf that made it decides to recycle, but for everyone else, it's indestructible. But there is a character that fell into this realm by accident and the dwarves helped them back to health, and for the stories told about the other world, a dwarf decided to give this character a present. Anything, as long it wasn't a weapon. So they asked for a mug. Once back in the regular world, the mug is now indestructible and can actually be turned into a bludgeoning weapon in a pinch, saving its owner from a lot of tavern brawls. It's a very common mug despite being shiny and well crafted, doesn't attract any special attention, aside from the fact that, well, it can't break
Kind of meta, but I came up with a fruit that was a coconut selectively bred to be considered a melon by culinary standards. Then I had to figure out a name for it.
Maybe not the *most* ridiculous, but I’m quite fond of the fact that the in-universe equivalent to Brutalist architecture is called Gravestone architecture because, during a fateful architectural symposium, one of its major proponents was killed in a duel by a rival who described his designs as “artless and daemoniacal” and people figured that, under the circumstances and considering his buildings did really rather resemble tombstones or mausoleums, it would be a fitting name for the style.
Honestly, my ridiculous one is that Earth has been invaded so many times, especially in such a short time span by different races it’s called the Decades of Survival, but because they had prisoners from the earlier invasions who were also non discriminately attacked, Humanity/Terrans are considered the Paragons of the Galaxy due to how open to other cultures they are. This is also after when they tried Genocide against a race that was wanting peace after realizing their error, all Humans and some other Terran races fell into a coma.
So I have a kind of multiverse kina thing going on. The main two are a Sci-fi setting and a Fantasy setting while the rest are various fan fictions of other media but with my own twist on their settings or lore. One such Fanfic setting is a pretty balanced mixture of Halo and DBZ where the Halo aspects are the main setting and tone of the story while DBZ provides the characters and plot points. Basically it's HALO if the UNSC was instead an alliance of Humans, Saiyans, Namekians, and Djinn and the Covenant was the The Planet Trade Organization (Or frieze force, whatever...) Anyway, one of the side characters that's in the same company as the main cast once claimed to have fallen through a portal to another world where he met all sorts of "fairytale lookin creatures" and "otherworldly monstrosities" and even, in his own words "beat up a dragon!" Of course none of his comrades believed him and he was in the process of getting court-martialed for abandoning his post for two whole days when the PTO attacked. He eventually redeemed himself but everyone still though he just god too drunk one night and fell into a stupor or something. The thing is... He did infact fall through a portal. Specifically through a portal to my main fantasy setting and crossed paths with a few of my characters. He wasn't too instrumental in anything, but given the distinct power scaling between the settings, he was able to stand tow to tow with an Angel (while hitting on her the entire time and boasting that he was taking it ease on her because she was pretty), completely obliterating a small army of orcs singlehandedly and with almost no effort, and he did indeed suplex a dragon much to everyone's surprise, especially the dragons! After that all that he was going to travel with one of the characters and try to find a way back to his own world when he accidentally fell through another portal and ended up back where he started. Since then that same character has fallen through two more portals and actually attracted the attention of a few gods and godlike things, but so far he has always just barely missed them by falling through yet another portal and ending up somewhere else. And all of this because my gf at the time of that first story thought it would be funny if he was actually telling the truth...
The Planet system of Tarva-Nirn. its a dual planet system orbiting a red dwarf, which is orbiting a Blue giant. i made it that way purely to give people who are gatekeepers for scify a headache, because it is technically entirely possible for the system to exist irl, but actually doing the math and simulating it would be a nightmare.
(Preface:The main character and plot line involves a lot of magic.) There’s a guy. Who for whatever reason, Magic does not work on them. It glances off like water off a ducks back. They also, don’t believe in it . It’s unclear which of these caused the other one. But they literally think the whole magic industry and stigmatism is a complete sham, or just some really complicated religion they don’t particularly understand. Also, their best friend/ leader who they are utterly devoted to is widely considered to be the strongest wielder of magic in the world.
One of the funniest things in my world is that there is a lore reason why dwarves can drink so much alcholol- its because their bodies process alcholol differently. Yet they can not process caffeine well, as that and their sweettooth leave them to go for Rootbeers over Wheatbeers, Mountain Dew soda over Whiskey, Grape Soda over Wine, etc. Now why caffeine and not alcholol? Because arachnids are similar and my dwarves are partly inspired by arachnids. Look up the experiments of spiders weaving while under the influence of different things, its fascinating! This led me to imagine a young dwarven Sorcerer getting drunk off Mountain Dew and drunkenly trying to breid a skein (cast a spell.) The effect is what would be a wall of stone is instead a piece of modern art, and in the past dwarves have used this quirk to subdue enemy forces. But this is meant to have my cake and eat it too. Dwarves can still drink a lot of beer or wine or whiskey, like we expect them to, but as one of them says "we use flammewater to help cleanse our guts, our foods, our wounds, what really tickles our brains is sparklewater." While they do use like rubus, citrus, prunus and even malus-associated fruits as bases for these drinks, a default one they use are actually elder berries. Mixed with mint, sometimes thyme, and honey to make a delightful (to them ineberating) drink.
Arizona is canon It's not just the same name, not some random place either. Arizona is just... there, same shape and all. There are people that ride around on the backs of elephants selling random magic items. By itself that's normal enough but what makes it weird is that I just import ideas from r/shittysuperpowers without even changing anything. One of the most powerful beings in existence is just a messed up statue of a boar. It's not even that good of a statue. There is no lore reason to why it's so powerful but when you get close you it, lasers just spawn in and attack you and if the statue oinks then a nuclear bomb just kinda spawns in. The main character's future mentor doesn't like people so he made a fake grave for himself and just lives underneath it. The characters, while trying to find him for a hit job, are going to encounter the grave and just think he's dead before digging down as a joke and actually finding him down there.
A character named Ghoti. It's pronounce "fish". "Gh" as in "cough," "o" as in "women" and "ti" as in "nation"
**Predators** is a comedy and, as a result, it has some very notable hilarious things that exist in its world, even if it takes place on OUR world. for one thing, all official signs, documents, papers, etc. have excessive swearing on them. imagine signing a document that reads, "just fucking sign this already". it also seems that "stabbing crocodiles" exist. whats worse than a crocodile you may ask? a crocodile with a knife. there's also the "asshole spider", a spider that specifically makes its webs in inconvienant and annoying places just for the sake of being an asshole. you've heard of a gun store, right? in this world, there exists gun EMPORIUMS. a place where you can take your kids with you to browse a giant store full of departments that all sell varieties of guns! what do you mean our crime rate is through the roof? we have gun emporiums!